SOCIAL MEDIA IS RUINING YOUR LIFE | I tried to be ‘THAT GIRL’

why this is problematic . . .
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[@georgia1986]

Funny how we don't have a 'that boy' stereotype - double standards but also shows how girls are meant to be well presentable/put together all the time :)

[@HollyGabrielle]

this is SO true and it got me as well! it doesn’t make sense and as you said, holds females to high abs unrealistic expectations!

[@georgia1986]

@@StudyWithShreyality yes 100%. the pressure to be skinny and attractive as a woman is insane

[@MasiaMaksymowicz]

Actually, I think there is a 'that boy' stereotype, it's just not showing on social media. If you think about it, there is a lot of pressure on guys to be handsome, muscular, strong, brave, able to support a family, earn a lot, have a pretty girlfriend, etc. And it is a huge problem for those who were not born handsome or healthy enough to get muscular - very often they will not go for therapy or write a journal. They will not do makeup to look better. And if they come from low-income families from a small village, they possibly will not be able to go to uni and become 'that boy'.

[@georgia1986]

@@MasiaMaksymowicz getting muscular is way healthier than starving yourself to nothing

[@MasiaMaksymowicz]

@@georgia1986 but it’s not about what is healthier physically, because still there is a pressure that affects mental health. And I didn’t say only about having muscles but about othet pressures put on the man. I am a girl and I feel the pressure on me. But I know a lot of guys who also feel bad because they are not as perfect as social media wants them to be.

[@vaishnaviambatkar4353]

Maybe "That girl" means for me is that being herself and not faking anything, not letting others effect her happiness, be confident in whatever she does, being punctual, flexible, adaptable, having knowledge about everything happening around, doing things which makes her happy

[@emmahardey7132]

That's me . Yeah.

[@HollyGabrielle]

exactly! i love this 🤗✨

[@coffeetimestudies1643]

problem is it's not realistic. you can obviously be that person, but i think it takes a way a lot of humanity from you (we all make mistakes, have day/weeks/even months off,) I've never seen 'that girl' as an achievable goal, in my head is more of a 'i can be that if i stop living life as a normal human being'

[@__-gn3tp]

I wake up at 8:30 and I have my life 100% together. Do people not realise that waking up hours have nothing to do with productivity. If you wakeup early you'll sleep early. So Frankly, we still get the same available hours everyday lol. Focus on what matters, when you wake up is not one of those things

[@cinnamonbun216]

I think it depends from people to people. When I wake up early, I feel motivated to do a lot of things just because I had that me time when everyone else was asleep For me waking up early has everything to do with productivity

[@dantepepper]

Many young people fall into the trap of comparing there selves to many people which can lead to Dissatisfied and in extreme cases depression compare yourself only to the person you see in the mirror every day and you will improve 💪🏾❤️

[@HollyGabrielle]

YES to this!! 🙌🏻

[@AugherAndy]

I acc totally agree. It's a hard one cos we all use it to comunicate

[@user-km4yx6dq5p]

Tbh you are 'that girl' though. You wake up, exercise, have a journal, work etc. No massive difference compared to what you normally do based on your other videos.

[@HollyGabrielle]

without even trying, yes I do show similarities to the ‘that girl’ stereotype / aesthetic, as I said in the video, but my main point is that you just need to do what makes *you* happy and not do stuff just because you want to fit a certain mould. and of course, to emphasise that you’ll only ever see a tiny tiny fraction of someone’s life. even if it looks ‘perfect’ from the outside, it’s never the whole truth!

[@coffeetimestudies1643]

yeah but 'that' girl has normal behaviours. put together, you know it's not realistic nor sustainable, but journaling has been around since humans were around, meditation has existed for thousands of years and only now is popular bc white people decided to glamorise it (same for matcha tea), and being "productive" isn't really a big thing, you're just working.

[@AhmetKaan]

*"All is mental, change your thoughts and you will change your entire life."*

[@DemetriPanici]

*"Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking." - Marcus Aurelius*

[@pallavipatel9082]

💯

[@aesthetic-kl6hk]

MARKETING...🤥

[@circlinq]

Fun German fact about the end part of the bread: depending on where someone is from in Germany, the end has a different name (and we like to argue about it 😂). In the Swabian region we like to call it "Ärschle" - from "Arsch" meaning "arse, butt" 😂 And I agree, it's the best part 😍

[@not-a-ghost2206]

In franconian its "oarscherl" though i dont know if we picked it up from my bavarian grandpa-and we also call the first piece of cake like that :D

[@violine3446]

In Saxony it's "Ränftel"😁

[@DemetriPanici]

Loved the soft music intro

[@HollyGabrielle]

glad you liked it ☺️😌

[@whiteskull1067]

I think there's nothing wrong with having a "That Girl" trend. So many humans are coasting through life when there's so much we need to do to prepare this world for the next generation. I think people just need to remember that "That Girl" reflects 'perfection', which is unattainable for any human (this is made difficult by how social media awakens tribal instincts in people at a large scale). But there's nothing wrong with "striving" to be That Girl or That Guy, as long as we recognize that falling short is human. But the effort is to be applauded and rewarded.

[@jenniferanastasia]

the crust of the bread is the ✨best✨, i always save it for the end.

[@thistleteastudies]

Definitely not the only one who prefers the crust of toast!! My other half LOVES the crust of cake and sweet things, but will actively avoid the crust of bread and I just find that entire concept so strange! 😂

[@rochellavanderwal9320]

Actually never been bothered by social media and whatever it portrays. I did however struggle somewhat with the social norms that 'That girl' derives from. The whole idea that you have to have a routine, be very productive, healthy and get up early. That part of society isn't new, it just got a new way of infiltrating on people. I have multiple disorders and illnesses that prevent me from doing all those things even if I wanted to. I'm still unlearning the ways of 'having your life together' in that sense. Having my life together now means I feed myself with things that won't make me ill, I move when I can but I no longer really exercise the way I felt I should. I no longer try to get up early if I don't have to be anywhere. I basically no longer do things that truly make me unhappy or don't get me anything in return for some unhappiness. Being 'That girl' or rather 'that person' now just means do whatever it is you need to, to get through this life well and with a happy heart. Don't let others decide what that means to you ❤

[@s-9889]

I don't think the "that girl" hype is problematic and about being someone else. For me it's more about becoming a better version of yourself and taking good care of yourself. You don't become less you from waking up a little earlier or eating healthier :)

[@HollyGabrielle]

that's very true! whilst i decided to talk about how it could air on the more 'toxic' side, your point is totally valid and i 100% agree! 🙌🏻

[@manidipabhattacharjee8777]

I was legit just heading over to your channel after a long day of studying, and seeing that you just uploaded made my day. I love you Holly! ❤️

[@magda.glitters]

When I think if "that girl" I think about the perfection, productivity and to get done things "on point". Not every person needs to wake up around 5 a.m., drink matcha (if you don't like it) or doing joga etc. What a pity that "that girl" shows what kind of person you should be to fit into this "world". For me "that girl" should mean a girl who is THAT that makes her "one and the only" and lives her life that suits her the best. Everyone is different and this makes our world beautiful and colorful and not boring.

[@momentmemos]

I loved this video, the editing was so calming in a way. Also damn, those waves suit you so well! I actually just gave up the curly girl method a while back but you make me want to try again haha

[@monikafolwarczna2879]

The best 'that girl' video I've ever seen! Thanks for the motivational speech at the end :D but yeah I've kind of realised myself recently that different people have different opinions and things they like to do and honestly realising that makes me feels so much happier and freer.

[@lisahamann1647]

Hi Holly, how did you develop your routines? How did you find what makes you feel good about yourself and your life? I tried doing the "that girl" routine but it's just unrealistic. I want to live a life I enjoy but I can't figure out what's good for me. Do you have any tips?

[@shristiprabha7793]

Holly seeing your videos I feel so energetic and I just realized that your exercise routine looks similar like mine also you always nail those video aesthetics 👏👏👏👏 magnificent.

[@fanny.barrier]

I really don't see THAT GIRL as you described though... I think yes on the paper it really is stereotypical but in the end, THAT GIRL is the girl that prioritise herself, that makes everything possible to have a healthy body and mind, that prioritise her wellbeing. This is my definition of "that girl". You don't have to drink matcha, if you prefer tea or coffee or even just hot water, but the ritual of having a hot beverage in the morning that sets you up for a good day, you don't have to practise yoga, but find an activity that makes you feel at peace and happy, you don't have to eat avocado on toast, but overall eat balanced and nourishing foods, you don't have to read books if drawing is more your thing, but actually find some nurturing activity instead of scrolling on tiktok... Anyway, I think my point is clear, that "that girl" is the girl who looks after herself through little actions every day. It should be every single one of us 😘😅 Nevertheless, I think your video is really interesting and inspiring for all those lovelies who associated "That girl" to something a bit toxic or unrealistic. Yes, trying to be someone you're not, or just to fit into a stereotype isn't realistic and it's pretty toxic BUT you can always adapt this trend to your life and your authenticity. WOW sorry for the essay 😶

[@HollyGabrielle]

fanny! firstly, don't apologise for the essay (i loveeeeee a good essay 😅) and i totally agree with you 🙌🏻 the concept of 'that girl' *should* be used to help inspire and motivate us to simply be the best version of ourselves. however as you said, i wanted to emphasise how it could have more negative implications and talk more broadly about social media in our generation. because sadly, a lot of people do find themselves making comparisons, setting unrealistic goals, and trying to fit a stereotypical mould! as i said in the video too, i'm not an expert but i just wanted to share some of my thoughts in the hope that it helps some people, even if it was just through one small thing i said! ✨

[@emanabumadi3813]

I love the crust too..you’re not alone😂😂

[@petitmeowmeow]

Overnight oats are amazing. I use skyr yoghurt because I like mine super thick, so filling

[@vanitiwari1611]

My Holly is already that girl I always look up to! ❤❤❤❤❤

[@Vicky-io2gj]

Yeees, the crust is definitely the BEST!!!👌

[@_J_S_]

I am thankful for those like you out there who willingly like the crust. Its impossible for any piece of toast to be bad, but at the same time, the crust just feels a bit like eating the bottom of an elephant's foot

[@HollyGabrielle]

😂😂😂 “bottom of an elephant’s foot” omg I’m literally laughing to myself on the train right now 😂

[@maneskinnnnn7190]

I love the crust

[@_J_S_]

@@HollyGabrielle sorry if you never forget that when eating crust from now on 😄

[@_J_S_]

@@maneskinnnnn7190 I'll never understand lol. Its like its missing all the good bit!! 😂

[@maneskinnnnn7190]

@@_J_S_ real bread is mostly crusts, only the processed stuff has no crusts

[@jennifercharlotte6203]

Your attempts at headstands the second time made me laugh, thanks for showing that and bringing some realness to the vlog!

[@ameliamerrick6277]

Yes to the crust of the toast!! My Grandad and I used to fight over it every morning a new loaf was opened...

[@emmahardey7132]

I ENJOYED this video. I always like your videos and put a lot of attention into every single of them. And it's WORTH it. We have so many things in common which makes me FEEL YOU and continue watching you til the end. 🌷🌷🌷🙌😍😍😍😍😉

[@linneawestberg6435]

i do my matcha by putting a small teaspoon in a cup with just a little bit of water and mix that with a spoon to a smooth watery paste. then i pour in hot water and take the opportunity to rinse off my spoon so i can then use if to grab a small teaspoon honey, mix, add milk of choice:) i really prefer the "high" i get from matcha rather than coffee, i get more hyper and jittery from coffee, just focused and energetic from matcha. great study companion imo:)

[@theanshikaaas]

9:45 You are not the only one who love crust of the toast 😌 I also love❤ it

[@AsenathWaiteDerby]

the green smoothie you had for breakfast every morning immediately makes me think of 'that girl'

[@maryamalatawi]

Thank you SO SO much for this video!!! Also we can be That girl and wake up 12PM , productive things and reading journaling etc we can make it @ evening or any time we want .. Great video Holly

[@Doris-sb9rx]

HOLLY THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR MAKING THESE AMAZING VIDEOS!!!! love you!!

[@theswiftvet7107]

I'm 19 and I've always wanted to do ballet ever since I was little, do you think it's too late for me to learn?

[@jadevandieman]

Hallo machen! I really enjoyed the intro music as well. Thanks for your videos

[@paulinag]

Thank you so much, the timing of publishing this video is unconditionally perfect, I needed that so much right now, it helped to clear my head.

[@lucybayes961]

Love the end bit of bread ! The best bit defo! 🥰

[@leticiagomes8668]

holly, the videos was amazing, and I just wanted to say your hair looks beautiful!!! love from Brazil ✨😘

[@JehanneMarie]

You Freed your hair and you are so beautiful ❤❤❤🇫🇷❤

[@svetayordanova2545]

Matcha latte is best when made with coconut milk

[@Faith-sr8zw]

Loving the hair and glasses! What a beauty!

[@AugherAndy]

Yes social media is so toxic fr me especially Instagram. I just compare although I know it isn't Instagram's fault entirely. My problem is when I'm bored I never know what else to do ugh so much time is wasted by us all scrolling

[@JoJo-is-the-name]

I see a lot of people saying this isn't the "real" "that girl" in the tiktok and insta trends...but this is really how a lot (majority) of people see it, especially younger viewers. You might be able to think of it objectively, but most people aren't looking through the phone apps 24/7 with an eye critical analysis. Most will just subconsciously absorb this message, which is the very reason why social media is BAD for mental health.

[@danicarobinson4866]

If you are going to make matcha then add your sweetener after you have wisked the matcha with the water

[@mylenarocha4542]

holly, your videos are a true motivation to me, I feel really inspired after I watch them

[@girlfromsomewhere4770]

Thank you for this video Holly. I'm constantly finding myself comparing to other people whenever I use social media. This idea of being productive all the time and having your life all figured out is not realistic. And it's sad that a lot of people think that it is. But somehow you put this pressure on yourself to 'fit in' torturing your body and your mind. Then in reality you might not be realizing that you aren't LIVING your own life, you're just trying to create this idea of productivity so you don't feel 'guilty' :(

[@NehaGokhale]

I totally agree with the opinion on the crust of the toast!❤️

[@anuththarakodithuwakku7015]

Yes ..Holly..this is the bitter truth...love this..its feel soo relieved 😌..thanks for your effort

[@davidthescottishvegan]

Excellent video Holly and I don't use Facebook or Instagram and don't think I am missing out by not having them. I do use WhatsApp but try to have a balance by not responding to every single message. I am selective what I view on KZbin for example I don't view cooking channels that are non vegan and don't agree with my ethics and religious beliefs. Love 🥰 the video and love 💕Holly.

[@OHaguChanO]

If it’s quality matcha it tastes like seafood! At least when you first drink it! I like it a lot and I simply drink matcha with water (that has to be at 70°C and for that you’ll a thermometer)

[@ce71994]

Absolutely LOVED this video!

[@ralucacontu4464]

Now I when I look at you I always feel like there's something different and then realise it's the hair! You look so good with your hair down like this. Anyway thanks for bringing some truth and reality to social media beacuse it's needed and appreciated✌🏼

[@okay4ngel]

just discovered your channel and WOW i love it!!!!!

[@amedeetje]

I love your hair and your new glasses. You look amazing! Lovely video btw x

[@aishaalmokhtar4174]

Holly I just want to say that I love you so much and my whole family knows you because im always talking about you !! I'm from Libya ❤️

[@Joana-iy1uy]

Loving these videos holly!!

[@Blanaka5]

I don't like routines beyond the basic ones like washing your teeth twice a day - but even this has no specific time set. It just sounds boring, but in a scary way, like I'm trapped by something. I need freedom (of course in a reasonable way so that I can still live comfortably). That's it.

[@user-bm3hk7by2h]

I just LOVED the advice. Thanks Holly

[@AugherAndy]

Ps Holly your videos like this are great you can see the effort in them. Really enjoyed this xx

[@lamisragab637]

You seem calmer now I like that

[@gwynethdelacruz9456]

YOUR HAIR LOOKS SO GOOD!!

[@kajol5376]

Holly you are working from home and studied from home how you keep your self productive because its hard to focus or be motivated can you please tell us or make a video

[@racheltang8116]

Holley, the real part is so funny, but you are very cute!!🥰

[@beepboop9976]

Thank you. I needed to hear this.

[@narenderkumar4310]

It was the best video this year

[@yeganehsetayeshnia7262]

Oky but Holly’s hair looks incredible today love it 😍

[@NoaElliott]

I like cold matcha latte, however when it's hot it kinda tastes like the ocean ahaha, sounds so weird

[@abirlemkadem8379]

Yes the crust in the best

[@someonee5084]

I HATE the crust! It's the worst part of the bed, I always make other people eat it for me.

[@holliesweet6736]

I love the crust!!

[@yogini9123]

Holly you look gorgeous with your long hair

[@joyce144]

Wearing bar top hiking too. Mosquito best food for them actually

[@danicarobinson4866]

You should use an electric frother to mix the matcha

[@tvdstatus5614]

That bread though 😂😂😂

[@ComputerBoyc-boy]

I eat the crust of the bread 🍞; I like it and sometimes goes number two 💩.

[@alexwang6248]

I am really want to just focus on myself. But somethimes I will just feel guilty when I want to live like those who live in "that" kind of lives.

[@PlanetImo]

My dad likes the crust best, too.

[@AugherAndy]

Could you do a video about friendships as an adult etc. Maybe it doesn't eve relate to you. I feel so lonely, all my friends are from different circles and I fee it's usually me to reach out etc noone cares.... Like also about outgrowing people. Eg I used to drink loads when I was younger and the girls from school are now into that but I'm not into that stuff anymore etc I'm a runner and love fitness. Most of my running friends are older and a lot of male.... I just feel lost. Maybe it's social media is seeing groups of girl friends and everything who knows

[@vaishnaviambatkar4353]

Happy Diwali holly ✨sending you love, happiness from india

[@HollyGabrielle]

returning the love 💚 happy Diwali ✨

[@_daissh_]

Is matcha like mint? 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️ I like the crust as well but I prefer it for bread not toast 🤣

[@flaviealbert]

I really needed this video thank you Holly🤍

[@clariseulim4745]

What fountain pen do you use?

[@janinaxxx]

Thanks for reminding us that we are enough the way we are!

[@sunnys2434]

LOVED this video!

[@despinabastianou7154]

I looooooveee this video!!!! Great job ! ❤️ Keep going!

[@savannaleehodgkinson189]

That matcha looked weak Holly haha

[@emmahardey7132]

You ARE SO PRETTY!!! 🌷🌷

[@fazaraufa]

YOU'RE SO FUNNYY WKWKWK cuteeeee

[@whiteskull1067]

What I absolutely can't stand are people on the other end of the spectrum. Every modern human is living off of the backs of other humans that came before us who strived hard to achieve great things. Even the laziest human gets to live in a house, eat food conveniently, and use technology because someone with 1000x more work ethic made it happen. If you live in modern human civilization, you automatically have a duty to strive and be more than a talking animal who takes more than he gives. Humans who want to just coast through life can live off the grid and live off the land. I feel like the universe got sick of feeding useless lifeforms that it threw us "That Girl" to the extreme in response.

[@aromafromheaven]

Fantastic video

[@Diana05050]

This was such a great video!

[@okay4ngel]

i loved this video so much!!!

[@nomingary369]

I love the new hairstyle, oh you look so pretty. You shouldn't overdose on your coffee, as it is too addicting. I'm that person who can't get out of bed without the thought of having it to breakfast.

[@petra20216]

When I think of 'that girl' I think of a perfectly organised, super productive, eating healthy 24/7, working out several times a week, even daily, reading every day, with a perfect skin care routine, someone super disciplines in terms of studying. Someone where everything seems perfect and where you think: That's want I want, I should be 'that girl' too. But that's bullshit! Because even though you might be as perfect as 'that girl' It doesn't make you happier, often even worse, more sad then you were, when you were yourself. Of course 'that girl' can be happy as well, but I by myself often have the feeling, that these people put themselves so much pressure into their lives, to be 100% perfect, that at the end of the day, there not happy at all. Otherwise I myself also feel bad, that I'm not 'that girl', which is wrong, because you don't need to be 'that girl' to be perfect the way you are!!!

[@explicitlyme7497]

With this one, I think you tried to do commentary on something you don't understand. Most people who have made posts and videos about the "that girl" trend have spoken about trying to be their best self and that it's an unachievable goal to be perfect, but having a goal and working towards it is not wrong.

[@HollyGabrielle]

i appreciate your comment but i'm not too sure how you can judge how well i understand this? of course, i'm not trying to claim that i know everything about this topic or these broader issues within our generation, but i don't feel that means i can't make a video about it and give my interpretation of the effects or implications of the 'that girl' trend on consumers of social media (i.e. ourselves). besides, whilst this video was themed around the 'that girl' trend, the bigger picture was about social media in general, perfectionism, making comparisons etc.

[@explicitlyme7497]

@@HollyGabrielle Well you said you don't understand why people would want to be "that girl" and why they'd want to be someone else, but the "that girl" trend is not about being someone else. It's about being the best version of yourself that you know you can be. We call it "that girl" because a lot of times we see other people doing the things we wished we had the time to do or drive to do. You don't get it because you already do a lot of the things other people apsire to do in their daily lives that they haven't made time for yet. A lot of people don't have a stable workout routine or study routine. A lot of people don't have consistent work. A lot of people don't eat the way they'd like to or take time for themselves. They want to do these things because it would genuinely make them happy, but working these things into their lives is a process. A lot of people at your age don't have the luxury of living at home in a big house with free food.

[@chocofruits1534]

btw your hair looks ✨stunning✨ holly

[@AhmetKaan]

*"Life is much simpler when you stop explaining yourself to people and just do what works for you."* To literally 1% who saw this comment, I hope you have an amazing day.

[@kristine2923]

I like your glasses! 🥰

[@xLydd]

When I was a child I'd refuse to eat toast if it wasn't the crust, everyone thought I was so weird!