Living with Relationship OCD

Natalie is diagnosed with OCD. At times in her life this condition has been debilitating, but with the help of exposure response prevention therapy her mental health has greatly improved. Natalie wants others to know that it is still possible to live a beautiful life with OCD.
Connect with Natalie at / natalie.jeanettee and / natalie.jeanette
Support SBSK at / sbsk

[@vanessas6827]

Well said...OCD grabs onto what you care about. It's a horrendous disorder.

[@Vegancutie]

Yes! It is a saboteur, taunting and lurking to try to catch you at a weak moment. F ocd!!

[@nataliej.d]

yes;( its really tough. hugs

[@kinebrenna]

Yeah agree and I can relate 100%

[@zye....]

Isn't it normal to worry about stuff that matters u the most tho? If it is a lot, I'd say you're maybe very insecure or either very thoughtful, so a personality trait and not a sickness. For me, i worry a hecking lot, both applies

[@nerida3347]

​@@zye....Ocd obsessions are marked by the obsession being unreasonable , or technically knowing its impossible

[@artcoughlin8403]

So grateful to see OCD represented frankly and not sensationalized. It's an extremely painful way to live, solidarity to all my fellow OCD folks.

[@katherineashley5712]

🤗

[@jsncrso]

Not sensationalized? LMAO a top 10 debilitating illness by the WHO? What a joke. OCD sucks, but this chick is just embellishing her illness. SBSK needs to focus on real illnesses, not crazy people

[@nataliej.d]

thank you for seeing my genuine passion as my authentic self!

[@elizabethheintz8747]

Agreed!!! This is the best/most relatable example I’ve heard! It totally resonates!

[@OTnerd7]

My goodness, I also feel the same way. So glad this is being talked about!

[@Dipsxi]

As a person who suffers from OCD, Chris asked some great genuine and thoughtful questions.

[@nataliej.d]

yes! thank you 'Chris-Chris!'

[@giovannarandolph5454]

My husband was diagnosed with OCD a year ago and it’s been so eye opening for me. He’s always had some anxiety but after our dog had a seizure, his OCD totally came out and it scared us both. He’s been doing really well with therapy but it’s still tough sometimes. Everyone who deals with this disorder is a warrior and they deserve the utmost respect and understanding. Thank you for sharing your story!

[@MoonightVR]

My mom has OCD

[@AngelaVEdwards]

@@MoonightVR So does my mom.

[@katrinakollmann5265]

❤

[@big0561]

*May God bless both of you*

[@nataliej.d]

aww wow! it seems like you have such an amazing and compassionate outlook on your husband's experience. thank you so much for your loving words that lift up me and the community

[@gracie5451]

Thank you for bringing awareness to this extremely misunderstood disorder

[@alaads5944]

stop being so fragile you need to man up and act as a mature person and take responsibility, the weak don't survive and they shouldn't

[@carlos66965]

@@alaads5944 Needing attention through belittling comments is sad. Do better.

[@pradyumnpurohit5597]

@@alaads5944 huh

[@Ace-3.]

@@alaads5944why do you have to say that? It only discourages people. Either way God bless you and have a good day ❤

[@Sunset1705]

@@alaads5944Nope, that’s not it.

[@bridge7425]

I experienced this OCD in the beginning of all of my relationships- and I thought I was just broken. I settled on the idea that I would never get married because the anxiety was so intense and life altering. Thankfully I found help and have been with my partner for 5 years. It wasn’t an overnight change, but recovery (or at least functioning without such distress!) is possible!!!

[@chris1806]

explain more

[@quirogatnonerrat3214]

❤❤❤❤I am so happy you found love! I wish you both a long happy and healthy life! 🎉🎉 Sending love and hugs from Romania! 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

[@jellyrcw12]

So glad you're doing better

[@dianeibsen5994]

Cute pictures that your sister?

[@chillednshit]

I'm a 29 year old male from Australia diagnosed with OCD. I have experienced a lot of the symptoms Natalie describes and they are horrible. With time, therapy, medication and openness with friends and family I have gotten so much better but it still lives in the background and gains strength at times, usually due to environmental factors that wear me down. My heart goes out to anyone experiencing symptoms of OCD, my advice is to walk into the mouth of the beast; face the fears head on and you might be surprised at how weak they are in the light, be open with people you care about; you're doing the best you can and supportive friends/family will understand this, get professional help; it's not going to make it all go away but it's a useful tool on your journey, and consider giving up on a med-free life; it's not perfect but its immeasurably better than living in the hell that is the depths of OCD. You can do this if I did, I'm essentially fine now and I was BAD haha. Thanks for this video Natalie and SBSK.

[@Ace-3.]

Yea it is truly rough to deal with ❤ God bless

[@nataliej.d]

i am so glad you are in a stronger place. walking towards the fears is the scariest thing anyone can do, but also the most rewarding and relieving because you are proving to yourself time and again you can and will handle anything. sending best wishes to your healing journey!

[@dianeibsen5994]

Can you describe supportive family? This has never been my experience. Do you have relationship OCD, CPTSD? Childhood trauma?

[@JazzyASMR]

This is such a scary to talk about because most people who don't understand will tell us we're just being dramatic. Thank you for making a whole video dedicated to this!

[@nataliej.d]

yes, it is so hard to hear that! but, i just say they can keep living in their "la la land" if they want to believe that 🤐

[@linekoen8941]

Yes exactly! They say "but we also think things like that" but what they don't understand is that the doubts that we have may be the same as theirs, the difference is our ability to rationalise these doubts to not consume our lives

[@chris1806]

Well, yes you are

[@kennethmontoya7111]

I have a mild intellectual disability myself and very healthy and independent I'm 29 years old and i don't let my disability stop me from doing anything!! I participate for the Special Olympics bowling and track and field!!! I also help out my community a lot with a kind heart! People know that i have a kind a caring heart!!

[@katrinakollmann5265]

I have autism etc and I am stoked for you!

[@kennethmontoya7111]

@@katrinakollmann5265 I have a little brother that has autism he has a low autism he's just in his own world I have a mild intellectual disability and very healthy and independent!! My brother has autism too!! I'm a guy and very attractive to young ladies my age I'm 29 years old gonna be 30 next year! I Pray to THE GOOD LORD JESUS CHRIST That He'll find me a bride to get married and raise a family!!

[@Overthemoon1111]

God bless you !❤

[@edie4321]

Good for you. It's wonderful that your disability is not debilitating like OCD, and other mental and physical disorders.

[@kebasanders6200]

You go!!! Be an inspiration. I have Asperger's, and I don't let that stop me either. I also enjoy volunteering❤❤

[@vivianshome]

Wow, just saw this pop up right when it was published. I’ve had this kind of OCD (alongside others) for years and never heard it discussed. It’s so exhausting, especially when you don’t know what’s going on. So glad to see this video and awareness being brought to this very real form of OCD.

[@nataliej.d]

i am so excited it is being discussed on this type of platform and still dumbfounded as to how i got this magical opportunity. xoxoxoxo

[@opiateutopia]

For a person suspecting they might have OCD, it was such a helpful video. I also didn't know there were 300 subtypes of OCD so I looked up the list and found an explanation for many fears and behaviours I had for years. It might take time to get a professional opinion, but noticing obsessions and naming them as such already feels like a step in the right direction.

[@gemmag.2988]

Wishing you the very best of luck on your ocd journey. I was hospitalised for 3 months with ocd 30 years ago and have now fully recovered. I am proof that with the right support - CBT and loving family and friends in my case - you can lead a normal life. ❤

[@user-js3pe7xx6m]

wishing you the best, although, could you tell me where you found the 300 subtypes explained? i couldnt seem to find all of them in one place myself

[@annonimiss6422]

​​@@user-js3pe7xx6mLeaving my comment here because I'm interested in seeing them too

[@binabi]

@@user-js3pe7xx6m Commenting bc I wanna know too

[@nataliej.d]

i'm so glad.

[@kristen7623]

Wow girl, thank you. I relate to A LOT of why you talked about. “Confidence is not knowing exactly what is going to happen, but knowing that you can handle whatever may happen.” This really spoke to me.

[@nataliej.d]

aww. this is still a daily process for me to remember! but, that quote always stood out to me, i actually made a watercolor painting of it in my room! i love that quote because it applies to humanity

[@Hellokitty25422]

Thank you for reiterating this. I think thats the final step i need to take to get better! I was wondering how you are so knowledgable? All these lessons u shared i wish i knew 10 years ago! I just thought i was anxious but the official ocd diagnosis made a big difference

[@Mobiustransformation]

I started to cry when I heard you. This is exactly what happens to me, I have relationship OCD too -though is not the only one-, and knowing there are other people who just sit there, thinking for HOURS, and all those guilt and apparent laziness -which is in reality the struggle and the fear-, is... kind of comforting. I always feel like I am alone, that I am the only person in the world who has this and that there is something fundamentally wrong with me. But know I know I'm not alone. And I'm not diagnosed with OCD because I haven't went to therapy as often as I should, due to economic reasons, but I do have these exhausting thoughts and I can't stop them. I've tried with many, many unhealthy mechanisms such as psychoactive drugs, they do help me but in the end they're very brain damaging, specially if you take ridiculous doses like I do. As long as I hear you is like someone put a mic inside my brain haha:( I do the google searching too, I even have kind of advanced chemistry and neurology knowledge for a non-med student due to the constant research haha...

[@nataliej.d]

aw oh my goodness. hopefully happy tears! oh yes, i would be on my bed, junior year of college, wrapped in my blanket, crying and staring at the ceiling, thinking... the worst. every day was spent that way, and thats all i wanted to do because i "needed to figure things out" definitely navigate treatment the way you see fit but what you are the most comfortable with! stay healthy here for you!

[@gjnybrbb]

I actually believe that psychodelics did play a huge role in the development of my OCD. After one trip I had so much anxiety that it contaminated my whole life for the next several years. Themes changed but the core fear of that I have done or have thought something extremely wrong and life crashing is always deep inside me just waiting to get triggered. It's hard to be in a relationships, it's very hard to get friends because I always fear that vulnerability that is required to be close with other people

[@alexanderwilliams6377]

You’re obviously helping so many people just by being open. Thank you.

[@nataliej.d]

wow, thank you 🥰

[@nji2300]

I just wanted to say that watching this video was extremely comforting to me. I was recently diagnosed with OCD (relationship type) and hearing her talk about what she has dealt with in a relationship like what I am going through right now made me feel SO much less alone. Thank you for bringing light to this topic

[@Natalie-gp2du]

OCD has to be so exhausting. Best wishes, Natalie! I can see you have put the work in to conquer your challenges! Thank you for sharing your story!

[@nataliej.d]

it is! but life is much brighter now. xoxo thank you so much for watching

[@daughterofaking9003]

It’s extremely mentally draining. I used to just cry from how tired I was about thinking so much. Over the years I have been able to control it more but it is honestly like being in a mental prison and you’re just stuck.

[@JohnyKoksu]

@@nataliej.d hey you said in video there is more than 300 subtypes of ocd. Could you give some article or source please?

[@jouleteon6186]

It was through one of SBSK's previous interviews that I finally realized I had OCD. I never thought it was OCD because I only knew it as the mental illness focused on cleanliness or things being "just right". But, these videos shine a light onto OCD, and the complexities of it. It was through these videos that I finally sought out help, and I will be forever grateful for that. Sending much love to Natalie; I related to just about everything - and I mean everything - she said. OCD is a beast and I wouldn't wish it on my own enemy. It literally will have you convinced your worst fears are true, I can't think of any other way to describe it. Before therapy and medication, I remember being unable to leave the house for longer than a couple minutes without bursting into tears. Keep being brave! Know you're not alone : )

[@lucyii]

YES! This comment xoxoxox

[@lalalallamas]

Same!!! I figured out I had ocd after another one of his videos too ❤

[@umi2751]

I'm glad you were able to figure it out and hope you got yourself the support you needed ❤

[@nataliej.d]

aw!! such sweet words. when i was so depressed by this illness, i would say the exact same thing - i wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. that's how disabling this is. you are brave!

[@edie4321]

That sounds like OCPD. It is different.

[@chillcatz]

OCD is annoying af, I was diagnosed as a child, and it's been a hell of a journey for me! We all eventually find our ways of coping and soon after, conquering this condition! I advocate for those who are currently battling it in their daily lives! You got this, Natalie ❤

[@deborahfairbanks4012]

I used cognitive behavioral therapy. So if I fixate on something, I tell myself that it was really something else that happened. Like, I lost my iPod and was grieving over it, I told myself that my sister that died has it and is enjoying it. That works for me. It stopped me from fixating on the loss and chastising myself for losing it.

[@shalacarter6658]

CBT is great!

[@esm1817]

I did that once. I lost some cash while overseas (long story). I was starting to obsess, so I made up a story about how the person who took it had a relative with cancer or some other terrible terminal illness and they were desperate for money. It made me stop obsessing even though I knew probably the thief was just greedy.

[@kieran3862]

I’m sitting here crying watching this video because it’s nice to know someone else is going through the same thing I’m dealing with. I’ve been struggling with my OCD for years now and am really lost.

[@nataliej.d]

aw oh my goodness. i remember those overwhelming feelings of feeling seen and being able to relate and feeling much less alone on this boat. there are avenues to get help and feel more found! i am so glad this was cathartic for you

[@Rootbeeroverseer]

Some subtypes, from when my ocd first started manifesting at around ages 13-14, seem almost laughable to the ones I have now. I'm 34 now and some have revisisted, some are gone, but overall just learning over the years has been the biggest victory. Knowing what ocd, how it works, what it is and where it comes from is a large portion of living with it. Videos like this and folk like Natalie help a lot to make sufferers feel less isolated. Things get better; stick with getting help and learning!

[@HanzIsGerman]

Grew up with a OCD stay at home mom. She cared about us as kids and loved us but her OCDs were constantly more important than her children. She has cleaning OCDs to this day. I developed major anxiety and ocds myself but I have mentally overcome it. Having experienced it myself, the best way I can explain it is your mind feels like it’s not yours and you have to constantly battle someone in your head who isn’t even a part of you. Like an intruder that you can’t get rid of.

[@edie4321]

There is OCD, and OCPD. The PD is different. I think that may be your mothers thing.

[@orcashadow8989]

Holy crap. I thought I had a good understanding about OCD but there's a whole rabbit hole I didn't know existed. Thank you Natalie for teaching me so much! I'm glad your therapy is helping you. You've come a llong way.

[@nataliej.d]

AH! i'm so glad this opened your eyes and you are learning so much. us in the community appreciate this so much!

[@blondie3743]

There's 100s of subtypes, so thank you even it's just scratching the surface. It's truly an isolating disorder.

[@vitoriakipnis4149]

As someone with autism that wasn’t able to see the ocd in me, I think I’m finally realizing there are more things other then cleanliness and organizing… this is very informative. Thank you

[@Plethorality]

Than. And yes.

[@EMILYHERRERA]

Autism has some of these behaviors that exist just due to being autistic, not also having OCD. The two things can occur together, but they are two different things.

[@esm1817]

Yeah, I can see why autistic adults are so often diagnosed with OCD either as a preexisting diagnosis or a comorbid diagnosis.

[@elleg3651]

​@@PlethoralityYou must be a genius😮

[@blondie3743]

There are so many subtypes of OCD, it's sorta like a spectrum like autism. In terms of traits and symptoms they are very similar but there are some key differences

[@toomuchtotype6079]

Listening to her story really made me wonder about my own mental health. I seem to deal with a lot of what she described. These videos are helpful on so many levels. TY 🙏🏼

[@MarianaArboledaF]

Why am i crying??? You're such an amazing person. Thank you

[@nataliej.d]

AW what! i cried too hehe. days later when reality hit me such a huge dream was reality🥰

[@commandery3574]

i'm really truly so grateful for this video,. a therapist i trust recently diagnosed me with OCD, and at first it was a struggle to accept the diagnosis but now i feel it is right. when she said "OCD grabs on to what you care about" that really resonated so deeply within me. it's a struggle every day not to let to thought and emotions scrape my mind bare and raw. i struggle everyday with extremely obsessive and difficult thought loops and thought trains. i have to force myself to do things because i have goals i want to accomplish, but OCD is so much more than germs. it's the fucking endless loop your mind goes and for some reason it just can't let go of it and feel normal. sometimes it feels like you can't breathe. thank you for this video.

[@ClaraFall]

Omg just recently got an appointment to get diagnosed with potential (R)OCD, this video comes on the perfect time for me❣️ I feel this video so hard! Stay strong people, we can do it❤️

[@toddburgess5056]

She seems like such a bright, loving, and happy young woman. I am sorry that she struggles so much with her illness.

[@nataliej.d]

thank you so much! i don't struggle now, but i may again, and thats okay, because i am prepared and have so many tools

[@toddburgess5056]

@@nataliej.d you're quite welcome. I came from a time when conditions were drastically under-diagnosed, or blamed on "over-reacting" etc... I know that I began feeling the effects of these conditions in highschool, and never really got any help for them unfortunately. I'm so happy that this channel exists so that people can share their stories of success, and possibly pass that on to others. ☺️😊☺️

[@Alcoholpad]

Thank you for doing this I never realized I had ocd. Being that it’s portrayed on media as extreme cleanliness and organization, counting your steps type stuff when in fact. At my hardest times in life the rumination is so tiring replaying old things you don’t even care about anymore over and over in your head, continuously checking the door to make sure I locked it cause I forgot. I’m also a mother so I struggle with perfectionism sometimes people tell me to relax, kiddos hair looks fine. It’s so exhausting and hard for me to relax at times. I’d describe it as an elephant sitting on a mouse’s lap, the anxiety and depression that comes with it is debilitating. It’s a very exhausting disorder

[@PalaszewskiFamily]

Natalie, I am grateful to you for enlightening me about OCD. Ignorance and misdiagnosis has kept me from seeing these same traits in myself. You seem brave and kind and I love what you said about not knowing what will happen, but knowing you can get through it. Thank you, SBSK! 🙏🏻💖♥️💜

[@nataliej.d]

aw, i can tell you are so self-aware! thank you so much for your beautiful words. yes, that statement is so beautiful and meaningful to me, something that is relevant to anyone

[@sabinethegaydragongeek]

Hi Natalie, I am an OCDER myself and a lot what you described I was feeling when I first got diagnosed. I couldn’t have the words to describe it when I was 14, but I relate to what you said about OCD changing overtime. My OCDemon is a Frenemie of mine, sometimes they help me be responsible and sometimes they force me into finishing a task. I may be biased but I am also Autistic and may be an ADHDer as well, so I don’t think of the OCD as a parasite anymore. Anyway, thank you for being so wise and so sweet. What a wonderful interview you gave! Sabine ❤

[@emilyament3085]

You helped one person over here. I'm going to ask my therapist to watch this video. I've been wondering if all of my anxieties could be caused by ocd and the way you described that endless cycle of worry of what ifs and even more specifically the sub types, and how they interact together. Girl you may have just helped me more than you know. I've been feeling really down on myself and everything feels like too much lately. Thank you so much for sharing. ❤

[@nataliej.d]

AH! look at that moment of clarity. they do exist, things come up that can change our lives for the better. i am so glad you stumbled upon this 🍹cheers to this new road of discovery for you xoxoxo

[@catherinehart3775]

Oh my goodness!!!!! I’ve never seen ROCD represented before!!! It was like I was hearing my exact story. I have this type of OCD plus magical thinking and the way you described it made me feel so seen and understood. It took so long to get my diagnosis because having fear around relationships isn’t necessary out of the ordinary so people didn’t take me seriously at first. It took over my life and I eventually ended up in 3 month inpatient treatment. THANK YOU THANK YOU for this video!!!! I don’t even have the words for what it felt like to finally see someone else talk about this. I’m so grateful ❤❤❤❤

[@AspieMoonWoman]

I can see from the way she explains the struggle of self doubts in relations and fear of being abandonned and alone and interpretation of every minor behaviour(their freind is late) as "theyre leaving me.." "i am not worthy" these thoughts can be interpreted by a therapist as signs of borderline personality disorder. Thats really insightful cause it means OCD can easily get misdiagnosed . Its probably best to look at the pattern of the way your brain think about everything..not just at one stage in life.

[@rosanagutierrez7635]

Thank you for putting up this content and for telling this story. I was diagnosed earlier this year with OCD and everything that Natalie said was true. It brought tears to my eye because I am also in the best point I have been in a long time. Recovery is possible and in the end, you return stronger and more resilient the ever. Anyone with OCD is a worrier!

[@balaam_7087]

Hi Natalie, and thank you for sharing your story. It was nice to hear your experience first hand, and you express yourself rather well. There’s no telling how many other people with similar difficulties you’re helping through videos like this, and that’s something to be proud of.

[@lucyii]

This was so eye opening. I realised I may have pure OCD after watching another SBSK video!!! I’m planning to put myself on the waiting list to get evaluated for it, I was late diagnosed at 27 for ADHD and have severe anxiety. The different sub types are so interesting to hear about too; no wonder OCD is so hard & vast to diagnose. So many pathways/situations could take the form of OCD. Thank you Natalie for being so open and bringing more awareness to the world. And as usual- hugs to Chris 🤗

[@bloot1140]

Thank you so much for this. I mean I'm sorry she has to go through OCD, because it is such a horrible and hidden disorder. But thank you for sharing this and spreading awareness. It makes me feel so seen and heard.

[@roosm1546]

Thanks SBSK for another video on relationship OCD! It's comforting to know I'm definitely not the only one experiencing it. Nathalie explained everything so well

[@nataliej.d]

thank you so much. it is so comforting for me to have exposure to this community, i need to remember this!

[@Betty484]

This video is eye-opening for me. She articulates her thoughts so well. This helps me so much.

[@lemondedetr]

I suffer from various mental illnesses, I am actually disabled because of them, and not one of them being OCD and listening to "you can't really trust anything" was just... how I feel on a day to day basis. So, regardless of your mental illness, we're here, we have things in common and, needless to say, of course, I support you and your story. Thank you for sharing.

[@emmajost-price2421]

I am so thankful for you telling your story Natalie! I have struggled with Relationship OCD and this really makes me feel seen. Thank you to SBSK for bringing light to OCD (especially types of OCD that involve mental compulsions)!

[@nataliej.d]

thank you to Chris-Chris always! i am so thankful for this opportunity and for you to listen keep going xo

[@daniellekeen]

Have OCD & started crying hearing you say “Confidence is not knowing exactly what’s going to happen, but knowing that you can handle whatever may happen.” So helpful hearing this, wrote it in my notes!

[@LindaKayHolevas]

This is a very helpful video. Natalie is a breath of fresh air & has amazing self-awareness. While my OCD is much more mild & I’ve been in therapy for over 30 years for it, it’s always good to stay on top of it & be part of a supportive community. I think Natalie will help a lot of people with this video. She is a bright light in this world & I wish her nothing but the best! Please never dim your light for anyone or anything, Natalie! I am sending you so much love & healing light~! 🫶✨

[@janehayes8840]

You are really articulate about explaining your OCD, rumination, and subtypes. Thank you for your honesty and openness. You are helping others through this video🧡

[@nataliej.d]

ah! thank u thank u thank u

[@martybob55]

Natalie, you are an amazing person! Whatever your diagnosis and subtypes..I feel that you are still deserving of love and compassion and happiness. Thank you for illuminating and sharing your journey with us. You are a beautiful person and Chris is awesome.

[@Mr.E419]

I learned more about my OCD in 30 minutes than i have in almost 30 years! My wife struggles with Epilepsy and severe bipolar. With all of her doctors appointments, I dont see doctors very often myself (and thats against my wife's wishes). At first, when you said that OCD can't be cured (only managed), my heart sank. But i kept listening and hearing that youre managing a severe case, that gave me my hope back. Most of the time, mine is very manageable and now i know i can get myself thru the more intense moments. Great video and amazing channel! Thank you to all involved 💜

[@emilyscheideler5432]

Yes more OCD content!!!! Plz. You’re validating so many people. Thank you thank you.

[@cobblecattt]

OMG I think I have this too. I researched this a bit because every time the romantic phase started in a relationship my whole mentality would change about the person. Some feel like the relationship is threatened or the other person is some threat too. Makes sense, because being in the relationship IS causing us to question ourselves ALL THE FREAKIN TIME. The way it would surface in me (was) extreme focus on every perceived flaw. I would have huge fear about seeing him because I never knew how I'd feel, if I'd be happy to see him or repulsed. It was hell, a very different time for both of us. The amazing thing is I was finally able to come out of it because I held onto the faith that I eventually would, and also he had amazing determination and patience to deal with me, lol. Now we're married with a house and a baby and 5 kids combined. I would've never imagined myself here but I'm so glad I am❤

[@elliec9035]

This video is amazing! I was diagnosed with OCD a little under 2 years ago and I relate to so much of what she is saying! I have so many of the same thoughts and compulsions as she does and I also do not have any cleaning or lining up compulsions. Thank you for making this video, this is SO relatable and reassuring about my OCD.

[@clarec3]

This was so interesting! She is extremely articulate at explaining the various aspects of OCD, Thanks so much!

[@iloveyou4680]

I struggle with contamination OCD as my main theme, then hit & run OCD, checking OCD (stove,door locks) & relationship OCD & even though she sounds bubbly in describing this, it is because she is not currently in a "OCD episode". There are times were we can keep the thoughts "at bay" but when we cant keep them at bay, we cant eat, we cant sleep, and all we can think about is "WHAT IF". I didnt realize i had OCD because google definition is way off.

[@abc_13579]

Natalie, your focus on being a good person, daughter, partner, citizen, etc., is admirable; I hope you're also paying attention to your responsibility to yourself. When we focus only on our responsibilities to others, we can lose our ability to enjoy life- our days become full of fears over whether we acted appropriately. Over time, this can be quite draining. The challenge of life is figuring out how to take care of our own needs while respecting the needs of others and while fulfilling our obligations to the world around us.

[@nataliej.d]

hi! 100%. that's why i took matters into my own hands and was ready to get better as soon as possible for myself! nobody told me to get better, i did!

[@shLjkah]

natalie thank you so much for speaking on your experiences with relationship ocd the whole time listening to you i kept thinking “wow this is me” and you explain things so eloquently!!!

[@nataliej.d]

aww warms my heart. i'm so glad you feel like i explained it well! i was nervous about that

[@lauradellorto94]

I don't have OCD but I struggle with anxiety and depression and the last part hit me soooo hard. "Nothing that you go through can take you away from yourself." Thank you so much! ❤

[@AliFinNoble]

Next do morbid thoughts OCD. I've only ever seen one other person talk about it. It was right around the time I was diagnosed and it was incredible I thought I was a horrible awful person who was going to hurt the people I love. I'm doing much better but I now have a physical disability which means these morbid thoughts often are no longer associated with the people around me but are just about myself. Its hard but the older i get the easier it has become.

[@ribby109]

Allegra Kastens, if you don’t already follow her, may be a good resource for you. She talks a lot about the more taboo obsessions and has a pretty large following/community.

[@blondie3743]

I have the Morbid thoughts myself and I get you completely. I feel so disgusted by myself and I'm always afraid god will judge me for the way I am.

[@Wolfstar26]

i have had severe OCD most of my life and was only recently diagnosed as an adult. it's amazing to hear a fellow OCDer perfectly describe everything that i experienced growing up and now.

[@LeandraGraves]

Thank you for being so honest about ROCD. It’s my main subtype, and as open as I try to be about having OCD(I have a soft white underbelly interview about my OCD), there is so much shame attached to having ROCD specifically, I always have fear getting into the details. So I appreciate you bravely bringing it into the light🖤 I have also had such a difficult time separating my magical thinking from having religious faith. What a mess that can be.

[@calliewright2946]

That last sentence - same over here! Listening to this video, the magical thinking part ahe described hit home so much for me - but instead of "is this a sign," for me it's "is this God trying to tell me something?" Is that similar for you? I am and remain a person of faith but it's so frustrating to navigate. I'm learning to trust in a God who said He didn't give us a spirit of fear, so this must not be Him speaking, but.....argh.

[@blondie3743]

Oh God same girl. I'm very spiritual and it's hard to navigate cause im afraid it's magical thinking OCD manifesting (even though im not currently diagnosed with it)

[@lindaalvarez8855]

I can definitely relate to this person living with OCD. I've spent many hours of the night & early mornings obsessing about my fears. Although I'm married, I still wonder if I should be married because of my trust issues. It's nice to know I'm not alone. I'm the one person who you've helped. Thank you for doing this important interview. I've learned a lot from you & your struggles are real! You don't have to research it. I also relate to almost everything you do, just a little differently.

[@nataliej.d]

wow! see its interesting because i look up to you because you are married, you are actively proving ROCD wrong! keep going and you made a commitment with your values in check, ocd is just trying to grasp at anything it can but you won't let it!

[@lindaalvarez8855]

@@nataliej.d Thank you so much for your positive reply! Marriage is hard & living with ROCD makes life a major challenge. But, I take it hour by hour sometimes.

[@bunniesprite]

“You can’t trust anything” omg u put so many of my thoughts into words holy shit! Since learning I have ocd so much has made sense and this video is so validating

[@nataliej.d]

ah! this fills me up. i am so happy my words resonated and that i continue to hear from others in the community who feel validated. yay

[@ShonanMiura]

These videos are so illuminating and educational. Thank you for making these. Natalie's honesty is really helpful in understanding OCD.

[@taylorjarvisDP]

I’ve been through this a couple times and I didn’t understand at all what was going on. Those times when I was suffering from ROCD were the absolute worst times of my life. Something else that can happen when you have OCD is it can jump around to make you focus on different aspects of your life. But one thing is for certain, OCD always goes after what you love the most. For me it was my relationships, and then for a while my Faith. But now, after 6 years of consistent therapy, support from family and friends, and good meds, I feel like I’m finally understanding myself and learning to trust myself. And that, I have found, is the best weapon against OCD. Trust in yourself.

[@pessoacomdeficiencia]

Assisti ao seu vídeo sobre viver com TOC e fiquei profundamente tocado pela sua coragem e sinceridade ao compartilhar sua jornada. É incrível ver como você enfrenta os desafios diários com determinação e positividade. Sua história é verdadeiramente inspiradora e tenho certeza de que está ajudando muitas pessoas que passam por situações semelhantes. A empatia que você demonstra ao compartilhar suas experiências é admirável. Continue sendo essa luz para os outros, mostrando que é possível viver uma vida plena, mesmo com TOC. Muita força e gratidão por compartilhar sua história!" ✨💪🌟 #TOC #Força #Inspirador

[@TheFamunited]

Thank you Natalie and Chris. Natalie, you are telling my story - at least parts of it. So many parts are just the same way as I experienced them. I also seemed to be the happy person to others. And I talk just the same way about my diagnosis - with a happy face. I found some very good therapists and I feel much better now, but I always will need help. Stay strong

[@TheFamunited]

I want to add, that I "love" to think about things and ask myself, if it is right to think about them or if I shouldn't do it. Should I stop thinking, do I think the right or the wrong way? Why do I think about it? How can I stop to think about it? etc. Somehow funny, but it isn't

[@morganmariephotography]

I went through very intense ROCD episode a few years ago before I received my OCD diagnosis. Since receiving treatment my life has improved significantly. I resonate with Natalie's story so much to the point where it literally brings me right back to my episode. In a way it was very cathartic to hear such a similar story to mine articulated so eloquently back to me. It feels as though you've given a voice to the feelings that have lived in my mind for so long. It's truly healing. Thank you.

[@dunewyrm3071]

It’s like she’s reading my mind with some of this stuff. So relatable. Remember, it also gets better with age everyone. ❤❤❤

[@nataliej.d]

awwww. xoxoxo so true

[@jellyrcw12]

Thank you for being so open and honest. I've struggled with relationship OCD too, very stressful and exhausting.

[@xKumei]

There was a study done semi-recently that showed that up to 80% of people with OCD would get misdiagnosed if they presented as anything other than stereotypes. It's really frustrating that even medical professionals don't know enough about it, and they can even make the problem worse!

[@nataliej.d]

so tough;( thank you for this data! this is so validating to hear that other people go through this, even though it should be the complete opposite

[@godsfool5284]

Yeah I’m convinced I have it but two therapists just concluded GAD

[@emilybarczewski2684]

This is so SPOT on. I have been seeing an OCD specialist for two years now for my ROCD. Hearing other stories I can relate to will always be special to me.

[@kacielackey3129]

I was diagnosed with OCD at 7, and I have tried to describe to others how things like manifestation can be really difficult for me. I feel like it gives my OCD too much "power". I've never heard anyone else describe having this same experience, and I so appreciate you, Natalie, for sharing your story with us.

[@Milkytears222]

As somebody who has undiagnosed OCD or at least suspects they have it, bless this woman

[@DarkOne7777]

Don't be afraid to ask for help my friend. These things are more manageable with help

[@dovestone_]

@@DarkOne7777yes, I had it badly for ten years between 7-17 and it only got better due to CBT

[@nataliej.d]

AW! hehe thank you! so sweet

[@Milkytears222]

@@nataliej.d OMGGGGGGGGGGGGG UR SO WELCOME AAAAHHHHHH

[@PurpleNoir]

@@dovestone_ I’m happy that things got better for ya pal :)

[@michaelmcardle906]

This is so great. Thank you for sharing. OCD is never satisfied. Such a great explanation.

[@CleverButClueless]

This was so eye-opening! I had no clue OCD comes in so many forms. Thanks for sharing!

[@nataliej.d]

[@arielgirl22]

Thank you so much for this video. I relate to almost every word Natalie said and its so hard. The worst thing with ROCD (and every other type of pure O) is that it's so hard to diagnose. It took years for me to understand why relationships, even good ones, can cause me such horror. It's a lot better with therapy and medications but there are still downfalls. Anyways, it was very comforting to watch. Stay safe and take care fellow OCDers❤

[@alexisbrodie9684]

Wow, thank you for representing one of my disorders so accurately. It is almost painful to watch this, because it is so true. Mine is managed a lot with medication and therapy, but when you don’t have those resources, it can be debilitating. Thank you for the work you do!

[@Ms777MIMI]

I’m so glad to see other types of OCD represented! I also have ROCD which is currently in remission. Before I found out what it was life was miserable. Even after learning about it, for a long time it can feel like you are in a prison in your own mind. ERP is what has gotten me out of my episodes every single time. Thank you Natalie, you’re amazing!

[@susansharp985]

You know what I got from all this? I really like this young woman, I'd feel privileged to be her friend! I wish her a happy, fulfilled life.

[@nataliej.d]

aw! such a sweet comment. i wish u a happy, fulfilled life!

[@susansharp985]

@@nataliej.d Aww!!!! Thank YOU so much for your reply!! I hope you are doing well, dear 😌

[@wyn2681]

Tysm for giving visibility about this disorder. And to all of you there suffering from it, you are not alone and it can get better 💝

[@christinevradenburgh507]

She is such a bright light ☀️

[@Fishful_Thinking4]

As a person with OCD that didn’t develop it until after a traumatic event in 2016, I’ve never felt so validated by another person describing theirs. It’s both a blessing and a curse to be so painfully aware of what your brain is doing in those moments. I also didn’t know about the subtypes within OCD, which provided me with even more validation - so grateful I came across this video!

[@katrinakollmann5265]

When I found out about ADHD and especially Autism, it blew my mind too. ♡ Happy for you and your therapyyyyy

[@katrinakollmann5265]

I have the big anxiety too ❤

[@IamEduD]

Thanks for your words Nat. Really means a lot. I´m happy she is showing OCD in such a clear way normalizing and not just for showing. Such an awesome person, really interesting interview!

[@andreafahnestock9349]

This is exactly how I felt before starting treatment for my OCD and depression. 6 years later I’m married with our first baby and my mental health is well managed. I’m so happy I stuck it out and found treatment 💕 there’s hope!

[@allisonvalenzuela95]

May I ask what does treatment look like for you?

[@nataliej.d]

ah i love this moment! gives me so much hope as well even if i'm at this place of recovery, because ocd still will always doubt. xo

[@andreafahnestock9349]

@@allisonvalenzuela95 absolutely! I take daily medication (Lexapro and Wellbutrin) and have biweekly Skype calls with my therapist I’ve been seeing for years - finding a good fit is crucial. I also do some CBT exercises where I retrace my thinking, identify the irrational thoughts and try to reframe as best I can. It’s by no means perfect but certainly worlds away from where I was. Hope this helps 💜

[@Deannaa100]

Powerful and insightful. 😊 didn’t know there was a term for this!! I struggle with many of these compulsions. Makes me wonder

[@CaRo-cw9id]

I think i have ocd. Here in germany it is bot known very well. I have to wait for my appointment to be diagnosed. I'm in therapy because of generalized anxiety disorder but that doesn't seem to fit a 100% at least in my oppinion. Thank you. You're such a strong woman. Live from Germany

[@marials9245]

Natalie, you have explained yourself and your diagnosis very clearly. You are a really nice person with a bubbly and positive personality, and I really wish you the very best in your future. ❤

[@beccaw74]

I relate to Natalie so so so much! I also have OCD, I've had relationship themes, sexual orientation themes, sexually taboo themes, perfectionism themes, and religious themes. I constantly had check boxes in my head if if something was right or not. It was tough.

[@pixiedrop4893]

Thankyou for sharing. OCD can be so stressful sometimes and a lot of people don't understand it properly. It affects you everyday with everything in your life. It's exhausting and can be so draining.

[@nataliej.d]

so so true.

[@kerrianneiapicca7480]

This really struck a chord with me as I was recently officially diagnosed with OCD. thank you so much for sharing. I hope other people see this and understand that ocd is more than washing your hands 300 times a day

[@jdhiv4]

Thank you Natalie for your bravery and for your story and I'm sure you have helped more than just one person!

[@nataliej.d]

thank you so much i am going to use these kind words as daily inspiration!

[@maja_ensaladas]

Dear Natalie, thank you for sharing some of your life experience and expertise with me. You found so many clear words and that made it easy for me to keep listening and to understand the thoughts and situations you have lived through. I have learned new things about OCD and that will help me in the interaction with some of my friends and with myself. To me, finding words to describe what is going on and giving names seem to be a big milestone on the way to getting control over the steering wheel again. Congratulations to you for all the steps you have taken so far and wishing you courage for the next ones. @SBSK, thank you for creating this positive space for people to share their stories.

[@AngelaVEdwards]

My mom has OCD and it made my childhood a nightmare. OCD is a disease based on fear. No, they can’t “just stop” and they get no pleasure from their rituals. My mom’s fear morphed into a huge fear of what would happen to her after death. And we’re a Christian family. My mom’s OCD was about germs and pathogens and such.

[@Ace-3.]

God bless her ❤

[@Froggele]

In what ways did it affect you as a child?

[@AngelaVEdwards]

@@Froggele Everything was contaminated and we had to watch out for germs in ridiculous ways. It was so bad that my grandpa (her father) made a joking picture of buckets of bleach water that he said you had to dip your feet into before you could go into the house. It wasn't quite that bad but it was pretty bad. She'd have things like a laundry basket in a corner of the dining room that she said was germy and if we even breathed near it, she would totally freak out. Stuff like that. Her OCD was all about germs and pathogens and the like.

[@Pixargirl85]

Thank you for doing this. It’s amazing to me how good at talking and explaining everything you feel and OCD stuff. Wish you all the best ❤

[@nataliej.d]

ah!! thank you so so much i was definitely nervous but i felt so welcomed🥰

[@adamnejmaoui1922]

This is like watching myself in the mirror. Thank you so much for having the courage

[@nataliej.d]

love this! courage and bravery gets you far

[@federico1046]

I am an Italian and I also suffer from obsessive compulsive disorder. I went through a period when I was prey to the craziest thoughts that I thought were real (the fear of being psychopathic, crazy and hallucinating). These obsessive thoughts gnawed at my mind and I had a mania for disinfecting my hands (a mania I still have now). And then there are the compulsions and phobias, but thanks to medication and music I am better, I can have a much more social life than before. I wish everyone who suffers from this disorder to deal with it in time and not wait as long as I did, because the longer you wait, the worse it gets. The only solution is to face it and try not to get caged by the vicious cycle that are compulsions. I apologize for my English but I translated everything with deepl.

[@lxlx7941]

Il tuo inglese è fantastico! Ho capito tutto, buon lavoro! ❤❤❤

[@IanGreenPiano]

This is such an amazing story. Thank you for sharing. What a beautiful young lady, so bright and full of life. So honest, and sincere. What a blessing to learn of her story.

[@nataliej.d]

what a blessing to read these words! wow ah these compliments made my night thank u!!!

[@kee-tu4cq]

This is a great interview! I spent 7 months of 2017-2018 in McLean residential OCD program and it saved my life. While I didn’t have relationship OCD I had many other subtypes including harm. It was destroying my life to the point I couldn’t function at all. I find it so sad how misunderstood it is, especially when so many people still refer to a neat organized preference as “I’m so OCD”. I wish I was like that (and didn’t have OCD). My ocd since my 2nd stay at McLean is manageable. I’m still in therapy and work very hard to catch my triggers, realize it’s my ocd (and do ERP with them asap) early on, so they don’t completely take over my life again.

[@ribby109]

Congratulations on getting ERP therapy! 👏🏻🎉 best wishes for continued recovery. My fiancé has lived with OCD for 15 years and has described the way it works in very similar ways.

[@myboyrocks05]

Thank you for sharing your experience with OCD. My son is 18 and has extremely bad OCD. It is such a horrible disease. Prayers for everyone going through this.

[@yoxyz]

Praying for you and your son

[@nataliej.d]

i am so happy your son has you there for him, and that you see ocd for what it is! you are doing the most you can