Spider-Man Is (Definitely Not) Murdering People

[@LARAUJO_0]

Rare clip of Brian before he went mad and started analyzing the Geneva Convention and solving the Zelda timeline

[@8Rincewind]

He didn't go mad; he ascended to a higher plain of thinking, which is difficult for us mere mortals to comprehend.

[@Roma-kp4qg]

This was the first BDG video I ever watched

[@pigeon1178]

Have you seen the jorts video? He was existing on another plane of consciousness since the day that man was born

[@JustSomebody5]

And fell into the depths of the Halo Expanded Universe.

[@thatoneguy9582]

I think this is the last BDG video before he started doing Unravelled so

[@theryanbard]

I'm sure they're fine. It's fine. Everyone is fine.

[@AstraIVagabond]

A New York henchman, inside an armoured car that's on fire and also about to explode: "This is fine."

[@1tylerq127]

@@AstraIVagabond Spiderman: "See, even he said it was fine"

[@electricjellyfish375]

Everything is fine.

[@armanchoudhary8354]

I'm sure everything is fine

[@blaxplays8215]

🙂yeah it's fine

[@papasquat9026]

“Defendant what’s your defence” “Your Honour the victim fucking deserved it”

[@janm3781]

Seems legit 🤔

[@northernlights9533]

Seems legit you good

[@aphato2770]

"You get what you fucking deserve" - Spiderman

[@janm3781]

@@aphato2770 Ripping quotes out of context and assigning them to other people can be a fun game. 😄 "I'm the best there is at what I do, but what I do best, isn't very nice." - Johnny Sins

[@AIOG7]

@@janm3781 lol

[@juanjuri6127]

"Peter Parker is a really smart guy and he probably put something in the web that is healing" Yeah nothing like some aloe vera to treat my I-BEAM CAUSED INTRACRANIAL HEMORRHAGE

[@thomazhonda9839]

Out there, somewhere, is a Karen agreeing with you. She’s at a vaccine protest and thinking, “Yeah, lavender oil works really well on internal bleeding”

[@Relgar47]

Hey man! Dont knock the healing powers of aloe vera! I knew a guy who got shot in the foot once. All they did was rub his neck with some aloe and it was like nothing ever happened!

[@periclod1877]

@@Relgar47 CPR also works if you get shot in the head

[@NakAlienEd]

@@periclod1877 a fellow man of culture I see...

[@What-ish]

9 months late but just wanted to let you know: This is a Good Comment™

[@editor633]

Alternative title: spider man’s lawyer attempted to explain to the court on how Spider-Man definitely did’t break several Geneva codes

[@thatowenperson7745]

no you have it wrong he tried to explain why he didn’t do it you said he defiantly did break several geneva codes which is either bad grammar or a bad comprehension of how language works as a whole

[@thatowenperson7745]

@@editor633 r/whoooosh

[@thatowenperson7745]

@@editor633 because when you wooshed me that meant the joke i made went over your head and now i’m realizing just how dumb you are

[@armageddongirl612]

@@editor633 redditor, also Owen tried to point out how the word defiantly was used incorrectly in this sentence, so OP probably tried to spell definitely

[@Grintock]

Definitely*

[@Alex.0470]

“For all legal purposes, it will be the truck that murders you”

[@finchhawthorne1302]

The great power of Truck-kun.

[@flamingcat1101]

@@finchhawthorne1302 yeah dude sending somebody to a different dimension isn't killing them

[@blairbird8022]

They don't die, they just get real tuckered out after fighting Spider-Man and fall asleep.

[@Horseshoecrabwarrior]

This reminds me of a Batman skit...

[@DeathGodRiku]

Forever

[@ThePsychicFish]

@@Horseshoecrabwarrior *DR FISHYYYY!! NOOOOOOO!!*

[@ledge1220]

@@ThePsychicFish I over-fed these men?!?!

[@skyens9037]

Permanently

[@pcg13]

"Hey Spider-Man, you're not going to do a murder here, are you?" "Not to worry, I have a permit." "This just says 'I can do what I want.'"

[@jesseking1403]

Sounds like something Deadpool would do lol

[@jennpenn10]

+Jesse King I agree. Very much like Deadpool.

[@KennedyRichard90]

I've heard this before... sort of, at least: "The way I see it... WE can do whatever WE want! Do WE have a deal?"

[@adrimm]

love that parks and rec reference

[@leprechaunluck24]

That is a RON SWANSON move! Nice!

[@ActivelyVacant]

Note that Spider-Man's webbing lasts for about an hour before disintegrating. So all those guys webbed onto the side of unoccupied skyscrapers in the middle of the night are living on borrowed time.

[@the2401]

but in the game it varies, the webs are still stuck to the backpacks which have been there for years, so it's possible that they can last several years or even be permanent. Which means that if the police don't see them (I'm assuming that the police travel to the scene after and take all of the criminals) they will die slowly of starvation/dehydration and they could also die from being pulled extremely suddenly and quickly backwards while falling

[@somedorkydude6483]

​@@the2401disregarding that they still are probably aren't walking after that one way or another

[@Joethemerciless]

Everyone knows that being kicked off a skyscraper and landing/hitting a building at terminal velocity is perfectly survivable as long as you're protected by a thin layer of silk. That's how parachutes work, right?

[@thomasstone3480]

as spidey's air juggling demonstrates, gravity just.... works different... in marvel

[@takeabowtothemoon]

there’s also when the distance to the ground isn’t quite enough for it to kick in and the baddie bounces off the ground before being webbed to the wall...

[@DrGandW]

Joethemerciless It’s definitely not terminal velocity, they haven’t been falling for long enough.

[@asher6477]

The way it is depicted in the game thy probably would survive, as they kind of stop midair, and then get pulled towards the building, however irl, with real gravity, they definitely would. Instead of gently being pulled towards the building, they would just swing into it at terminal velocity.

[@SirSethery]

@@DrGandW Though it probably is in-game terminal velocity. I doubt in-game physics would have it still accelerating after that much time.

[@fayept]

These are basically the mental gymnastics that Batman does

[@eora5142]

Exactly. Like, living someone in a train which is about to explode knowing that it's about to explode definitely doesn't count as murder

[@gengarvenom1180]

On steroids

[@brooksbrigmon2533]

I like how for most of them he’s not making the case that it’s not killing people, just that it’s manslaughter rather than murder.

[@katyamsden7624]

Thank you for making it completely utterly clear that Spider-Man does not in any way shape or form at all ever at any point murder people...except in self-defence and also if they definitely deserved it. I can sleep easier at night thanks to this video!

[@neferpitou.]

😂😂😂😂

[@DanielLCarrier]

Killing people in self-defense is not murder. Sure most heroes try to avoid killing entirely, but all Polygon said was that he didn't murder, and that's all that's legally required.

[@neferpitou.]

@@DanielLCarrier TECHNICALLY if you kill someone you have murdered its just when done in self defense you have a somewhat better reason for what you did and i dont believe this video was to be taking seriously.

[@DanielLCarrier]

@@neferpitou. Source? Google's dictionary gives the definitions: "the unlawful premeditated killing of one human being by another" and "kill (someone) unlawfully and with premeditation". If you kill someone in self defense, it's not illegal and it's not murder. Though given that in a lot of these Spider-Man is attacking people he could have just stayed away from, I doubt the courts would actually consider it self defense.

[@TheGrumbliestPuppy]

@@DanielLCarrier You right. If it's self defense, or defense of another, then it's non-criminal homicide in the US.

[@shadownode5970]

Spider-Man: *snaps someone’s neck* Polygon: S E L F D E F E N S E

[@dylanw.1740]

Peter parker was a professional wrester I think he knows what he's doing.

[@shadownode5970]

@@dylanw.1740 not when he’s SNAPPING SOMEONE’S NECK!

[@tomlegere8756]

@@shadownode5970 he’s making them punch themselves in the face. Not a neck snap

[@leafyeaveeey]

@@shadownode5970 you seem a little upset, I think you need a gentle reminder that spiderman does not kill, may I point you to the video above?

[@radranger55]

@@leafyeaveeey How the Frick is he not killing the person this is a joke this video is a joke

[@UltimateKyuubiFox]

J. Jonah Jameson Was Right

[@knockoutroundabout]

I can't belive Jalex Joneson was right all along

[@thomasstone3480]

you know they have jameson make a bunch of comments about how the omnipresent police spying system you repair is maybe not great and uh. i kinda agree

[@Feasco]

SPIDER-MAN: MASKED MENACE, DEFINITELY NOT *NOT* A VICIOUS MURDERER

[@PeterParker-ff7ub]

He wishes

[@coreylevine3856]

well now he do but what happen when he is wrong and get egg on he face when the true come out

[@JoJo_Reference2]

When Spider-Man’s attorney Peter Parker is trying to get Spider-Man off for 164 counts of murder a day

[@ironwraith852]

Ha ha ha.

[@Windrunner8]

Pretty sure Matt Murdock can back him up at trial.

[@eyeballheadinalabcoat]

This is why J. J. Jameson doesn't like him.

[@shaggyrogers1851]

@@Windrunner8 he does at least once in the comics. matt even helped him prison break one time

[@blazerheata6479]

honestly, BDG does look like a Peter Parker, and talks like one at least in this video lmao

[@aidanrobertson4720]

no murder here

[@yingmei-s4t]

Aidan R you can web the enemy to a train track to kill them when the train comes

[@taakotuesdays]

Mr. Blank not Spider-Man, that’s the train killing him

[@creamcrop1433]

@@taakotuesdays You can say that about any murder if you think about it

[@JonasAmick]

Indeed

[@guzturnal1793]

Ok

[@shawnyboi3756]

The “snapping neck finisher” isn’t a neck snap, he just forces them to punch themselves very hard

[@radranger55]

If that was the case then how did they get knocked out with a single Punch Spiderman the person who can lift 10 tons we’re just a single punch can’t knock a person out as seen in the game but when a person that does not have any super powers punches of self they got knocked out instantly what is the logic here

[@shawnyboi3756]

@@radranger55 are you foreign buddy?

[@radranger55]

@@shawnyboi3756 what

[@radranger55]

@@shawnyboi3756 no What does that have to do with my question

[@shawnyboi3756]

@@radranger55 you’re from America?

[@sugimototeru]

the webs just send the bad guys to Dairy Queen!

[@kyro8559]

Morgan F omfg

[@ethanelliott5096]

You're gonna love the safety zone! It's got hot eats and cool treats!

[@justinolson3757]

You do the crime, you get the crime!

[@angryyogbuscus1578]

They make the crime, and he eats it!

[@rhodes449]

The big Dairy Queen in the sky!

[@Korgano]

Spider-man doesn’t murder people. He just makes other people, and weapons, and objects murder people.

[@gavinwalsh9860]

I didn't murder him, all I did was kick him off a building and gravity decided to violently pull him to the ground.

[@alfonsoviquez286]

it wasnt me sir, it was the steel beam I threw against him at high speeds that killed him

[@HeadCannon19]

It wasn't me that killed him, it was the bullet. All I did was press a "button" on the gun

[@Wertsir]

You know like, technically humans don’t have free will, so really it was the starting conditions of the Big Bang that killed those people, your honor.

[@eora5142]

Reminds me of a certain very gloomy superhero

[@Grambee]

"The hardest part about this job is... you can't always save everyone."

[@GrassPokeKing]

Grambee *BOOM!*

[@Young_Special]

@@GrassPokeKing .........what exploded or what does this reference mean

[@GrassPokeKing]

young special I'm pretty sure it was supposed to be like Iron Man's "I think I did okay" _distant explosion_

[@robbiestrong-morse730]

and sometimes you are just mad at someone so you attach them to a truck and save the people in the truck but let the truck explode killing them because you just didn't really want to.

[@lemonadx]

Isn’t this from spiderman into the spider verse

[@rainwalkerstudios3388]

As the saying goes, "I won't kill you, but your hospital bills will."

[@SkynetT-1944]

If only health care was free

[@exu7325]

Only in good ole' USA.

[@ekki1993]

The US has some fucked up sayings.

[@janinemurdock2043]

My favorite is that you can kick a bad guy off of a rooftop all the way over to another, lower rooftop, and if that second rooftop isn't low enough to trigger them getting webbed into the wall, they will just... slam violently into that other roof. Which is totally ok, because again, Spider-Man is super smart, I'm sure he's calculated the exact height and trajectory at which someone can be dropped onto another roof and only sustain...very grievous injury, right?

[@KickyFut]

We're totally not going to mention that the force he would have to put into a kick that is strong enough to throw a person to another building certainly can't harm the person kicked...😐

[@f.i.r.e.5119]

@@KickyFut We're also totally not going to mention that even if they get webbed to the wall, the whiplash from that would probably kill them. It's a miracle he didn't kill any of the pigeons that way, either.

[@ryank278]

And we're also definitely not going to mention his ability to throw a bloody pipe at someone's face and only give the person a very minor case of serious brain damage...

[@creamcrop1433]

@@ryank278 Definitely not going talk about him throwing people off of 10 story buildings, because I'm sure that those people only suffered minor death and pain.

[@lowekycodm]

@@creamcrop1433 definitely not gonna talk About rapid dementia and paralysis that the enemies had to suffer for 5 months before being euthanized

[@trondordoesstuff]

"Technically not murder, Definitely bad!" -BDG

[@alaineneuburger2830]

"Instead of turning into a butterfly, they'll have lasting brain damage."

[@goldinthefurnace]

The excuses here were EPIC 😆🤣

[@teabisquitter1593]

Story of my life

[@wessltov]

Hey, that sounds like my going through puberty!

[@AIOG7]

Lol

[@clefadrylwires1348]

Hearing Brians "Um"s and "Uh"s getting more intense is pure gold

[@MrMrUmad]

This is the closest to old Polygon content we have gotten in a month. Thank you Brian. You are a good boi

[@deathschool91]

He's the only reason I'm still subscribed to this channel.

[@MrMrUmad]

Cooper Olm they have become Vox Media. All happened right after Gill and Gilbert ended and Pat and Brian said they needed to change some things on the KZbin. Think vox media execs are trying to chase money where there won't be

[@carlosrojas1012]

Does that mean we won't be seeing any more board games videos?

[@meowthra6515]

This feels like the alternative timeline where BDG got to practice law because he did NOT grow a crab claw

[@trueaidooo]

It's okay, Spider-Man specified he'd do nonlethal damage so as long as he doesn't do double their hp they're alright

[@jazzy4830]

yeah and as an arachnid wildsoul vigilante he probably doesn't even have improved unarmed strike so all his punches and kicks will only do 1d3+str mod nonlethal damage

[@shadowkat678]

@@jazzy4830 he does get super strength from those powers though so there COULD be an additional ability. I also,think,he probably could've taken a monk level or two.

[@ZargosK]

@@shadowkat678 to run through walls like that I think he took more than just one or two.

[@Sinsults]

@@jazzy4830 not in 5th Ed. Unarmed is 1+str mod damage. That is 1. Not 1 D-anything. And you do have to specify non-lethal, even for unarmed. Since Spiderman primarily, like 99% of the time, fights without weapons, monk is best bet for class. Most of his web attacks can count as ranged but he doesn't attack with webbing a lot because it's usually not very damaging. It's usually used for utility. So his damage is all based on unarmed really. So pretty much any class besides monk or something homebrew wouldn't make sense.

[@jazzy4830]

​@@Sinsults I'm talking about pathfinder, specifically an archetype which is a clear homage to Spider-Man, all of what i said is correct in pathfinder. To make a spider-man style vigilante fight with unarmed attacks however, you would probably take the "fist of the avenger" talent, improved unarmed strike feat or Variant multiclass into monk for better unarmed damage. However neither 5E nor Pathfinder is currently well equipped to produce Spider-Man as a viable player character. I would more likely go for a monk or kineticist to represent his suite of abilities.

[@bryansnaylor]

The neck snap I always thought was the classic "stop hitting yourself" since he webs the fists and jams them into their own face.

[@SaveDareDevil-Mx]

^^^ FR I don't see how everyone else doesn't see it this way or at least consider that viewpoint a possibility after having seen the move so many times

[@notimportant6733]

Finally someone gets it

[@IDK-lt5dl]

ACTUALLY, if you web them up, then do the finisher, the hands will stay in place, and it looks like you are killing them via neck snap.

[@secret-mage]

Spider-Man: Threat or Menace? HE'S BOTH!!

[@leons.kennedy2747]

Sometimes he's a menacing threat, sometimes he's a threatening menace.

[@Unpandorics]

2:33 The way the guy crumbles right there is just full of the exaggerated swagger of a dead prisoner

[@davidjperez8243]

He's not snapping their necks. He's using the dude's own fists to knock him out. At least that's what it looks like to me. 🤔 I actually followed the first guy I kicked off a roof and was really impressed when I saw Spidey had attached a web bomb to him somehow and he was just webbed onto the side of the building.

[@bladerj]

yeah,but his webbind dissolves in a hour, who is going to rescue the guy from the side of the building,also depending how high he is, it would be freezing as spider-man webings are not isolant

[@davidjperez8243]

@@bladerj Hey, that's on gravity and nature, respectively!

[@fritzytg]

It's definitely a "stop hitting yourself" attack and is wrenching the neck.

[@lenlimbo]

@@bladerj In fact, they had been used as isolants a few times. Either to protect spidey when he is forced to touch something REALLY hot, to protect his modesty and body temperature when something happened to his costume (too many times for Pete's comfort, and one is already too many) and I think they even isolate him to a degree from electricity, but I'm not sure of that one.

[@Kaunte]

@@lenlimbo He did make the webbing isolate electricity after realizing Electro was a thing in his life.

[@bonniebunbuns1782]

Judge: “Spider-Man what is your defence for killing people?” Spider-Man: *”It WaS sElF dEfEnSe”*

[@ciaphas3794]

ah, the Yakuza / Kazuma Kiryu method of resolving ludonarrative dissonance: absolute and adamant refusal to acknowledge it I love it

[@Young_Special]

.....what

[@NaughtiusMaximmus]

@@Young_Special yes

[@CommodoreFluffy]

Kiryu to the Sunflower kids:"you can't solve all your problems with violence" ... Kiryu: Proceeds to solve everything from random teenager's home life issues to exorcizing ghosts just with punching people

[@Young_Special]

@@CommodoreFluffy.........what?

[@Young_Special]

@@NaughtiusMaximmus yes of what

[@laurahoughton5911]

"we never said spider man couldn't murder someone psychologically" 😂

[@thetruephoenixful]

The neck snapping finisher: it looked more like he was making themselves punch themself. Worst case both their arms broke. Assault? Definitely. Murder? Eh

[@Young_Special]

Or fingers......the worst and brutal Finisher is when he grabs a dude with his webs....flips over him and slams him into the ground.....causing to prob break his spine and neck

[@janesmith1840]

@@Young_Special Probably? I think it's safe to assume they all die immediately upon impact. Nobody's bones are that strong.

[@ryanhutchinson4467]

I agree. I always interpreted that finisher as Spider-Man making the guy punch himself in the face. If you slow it down you can definitely see it.

[@2ndYHWH]

BRO THAT SOUND IS NOT HEALTHY, EITHER WAY THEY ARE DEAD

[@cooperwilliams3220]

@@Young_Special ya he flings them at a speed where they die on impact at that point

[@coss4vaee8-marciovinicius13]

This was one of the most funniest things I've ever seen

[@Yokeki]

Nothing bad ever happened to 'em! I'm talkin' no murders! Death? In this game? Never heard of it!

[@danbirch9739]

Epic reference

[@thisistheborkvoice.718]

buy my spidey suit!

[@yenee94]

What is it? No one has explained it to me

[@ZomBunny]

@@yenee94 kzbin.info/www/bejne/fZDViJ9jn8Z0n7c I believe this is what they mean. Ain't nothing bad ever happen

[@yenee94]

@@ZomBunny yes I was referencing that video too

[@jacob-un4xc]

This guy would be a great lawyer

[@Techninjaspeaks]

OK - this legit made me laugh lol

[@sabonnzm7193]

Same

[@zylnexxd842]

Lol....

[@theanxoiushero800]

Meanwhile miles literally electrifies people with thousands of joules of electricity then Volleys them into a car causing it to explode

[@Emrirwastaken]

also miles: throws a tank barrel at a guy, then proceeds to dodge a rocket launcher and the guy gets hit with the rocket launcher, then beat him up, then use a finisher to break the guys back

[@Dracinard]

Now for the pressure valve.

[@Miunim]

Now for the pressure valve

[@smoothiemcguffin2721]

Now for the pressure valve.

[@thetechw1z]

Somewhere in the game, you can web someone into a door and trigger a cutscene that opens the door, tearing them in half. Props to Slimecicle for figuring it out!

[@getoveryourself2212]

My jaw dropped when I saw he’s throwing a manhole LMAOOO

[@darthraider6652]

“Spidey doesnt murder” Spidey:*activate install kill*

[@ZonnexNecton]

Massive head trauma, neck snapping, drowning, explosions, and bullets in the head. Yeah, just scratches I guess.

[@psyducktective]

Spider man is a good boy who would never do a murder thank you for clarifying this

[@caramandunga100]

According to Marvel Spyder-Man database, he is able to lift 40 tons.It makes no sense kicking and punching punching people unless they might be meta humans.So it makes a lot of sense that MCU Spyder-man does not punch or fight average thugs,for example when he stop a Robert at an arm .

[@ziephel-6780]

@@caramandunga100 Some of the ones on the video, are average though lmao

[@Skarix]

Just goes from “he’s not killing anyone, it’s fiiiiine” to “ehh who cares” in just a few minutes

[@Hannah-xh2cc]

the balance of that patented BDG Humor (TM) and SEO-friendly, timely coverage of a AAA game is 👌👌👌 it’s good content, Tara

[@javieralmodovar2068]

Judge:we’re prepared to exonerate you of your crimes of murder for your protection of the city what say the defendant? Spider-Man: I’ll fucking do it again.

[@narutofan9tf]

Number 11 If you think about it, spidey kicks them first before slamming their heads into the ground, to knock them out so they don't feel the pain of their necks snapping, what a nice guy. XD

[@dallonpainter2674]

so he crushes their ribcage with his kick and then destroys their skull and spine.

[@personalspace6270]

@@dallonpainter2674 Its a videogame anyway if he punches a normal human they would probably die im sure he hits harder then a proboxer.

[@dallonpainter2674]

@@personalspace6270 He actually pulls his punches as shown when Doc ock accidentally punches scorpion's jaw off when he inhabits peter's body

[@azoidwolfpro]

What about the part of somebody getting thrown into a fire stuck in a web by spider-man

[@jzargofromelsweyr4733]

I was watching the gameplay, looking at all the ways he (definitely isn't) killing people, and it's like... "That KILLS people, Peter!"

[@Poglavnit_Pferdefuhrer]

"What happened to their hands, Peeeeeter?" "I, I don't know what you're talking about man!" "Their hands, where are their hands? They're missing their hands, Peeeeeter!"

[@JANCOff1al]

1:20 “for all legal purposes, you commited suicide” * wasted sign pops up *

[@foggynarcoleptic7058]

So, Green Goblin was just giving Gwen Stacy some unlicensed chiropractic ?

[@invock]

No, Green Goblin is a villain. Which means he murdered her. Pay attention.

[@cooperwilliams3220]

Actually Spider-Man was the chiropractor he caught her with the web knowing her neck would feel loose later so considerate

[@adamking5215]

yeah Spiderman tooooootally gave her some unlicensed chiropractic!! she's probably alright... right?

[@cooperwilliams3220]

@@adamking5215 ya I mean blood dripping from nose and ears and like not moving Judd’s means they r asleep and had a bloody nose right?

[@taufiqmahmud4637]

"relax in a pond", sounds legit

[@snazzy]

This is gold.

[@kaapicino]

Rendi

[@Abe-Lau]

hey buddy

[@zylnexxd842]

Yeah...

[@TIOLIOfficial]

"No, Amber didn't punch him, she *"HIT"* him, your honor".

[@eren7340]

Lmao I was just watching a video about this

[@Gixel_]

75% of those can be countered with "well they survive it anyway"

[@GrassPokeKing]

Gixel At worst it's ATTEMPTED murder

[@MrEden152]

i like how at a certain point he stops saying that spiderman isn't killing and just begins to justify why it's ok

[@Yokeki]

Hey Tara? It's good content Tara.

[@shadowvillefox]

Spider-Man literally says “Live By the Beatdown, Die By The Beatdown” He definitely has no intention to be murderous I agree with him being 100% innocent.

[@moopshcelroy]

Unlicensed chiropracty 😂

[@MrBates-le1ql]

3:17 "The truck killed him, I had nothing to do with it!"

[@wasabij]

I don't want video game journalism on the KZbin channel. There's a lot of that available elsewhere. I want video game adjacent entertainment on the KZbin channel. That's the transcendent content that we all loved.

[@Daniel-cz9gt]

Check this channel kzbin.infosubscriptions/UC2eEGT06FrWFU6VBnPOR9lg

[@Sara3346]

@@Daniel-cz9gt How do you get to that /feed/subscriptions thing normally?

[@Daniel-cz9gt]

I don't know, I thought that I had linked just the main page of the channel.

[@lbolen4304]

Rare footage of peter trying to justify his methods of fighting without getting his cover blown

[@artemissharp1227]

How did I know this was a Brian vid.....

[@qazwsxedc562]

Now I get why J. Jonah Jameson was calling Spiderman a menace

[@fiveyearmission]

These arguments will 100% for sure will hold up in all legal matters vis-à-vis Peter Parker's defense before a grand jury. (Also digging the haircut, Brian!)

[@danieljung785]

3:36 “That guy deserved it so who ducking cares right?” Had me laughing so hard 😂

[@TaigaXsenpai]

also comics physics humans are naturally more resistent to anything and nobody dies, unless somebody chooses to kill somebody

[@runeanonymous9760]

The Death of Gwen Stacy is an example of Spidey’s actions killing someone he meant to save, due to the nature of physics

[@ViridianForests]

@@runeanonymous9760 Which was intentional and probably one of the very few cases of breaking comic book physics for plot reasons

[@JANCOff1al]

1:36 “friendly fire will not be tolerated”

[@Infiniteimpossibilty]

Im either gonna need longer videos, or like 4 times the uploads Polygon. I’m starving for more of your good good content

[@meganhash7840]

Move aside, Matt Murdock, there's a NEW superhero lawyer in town

[@handfulmousefly]

*resting head on a Spiderman pillow* *Looks at Spiderman poster on the wall* *Smiles and nods to myself, knowing without a shadow of a doubt that my favorite superhero is not and never will be a murderer*

[@frigontech]

The way he was trying his best to protect his friendly neighbourhood spider-man is just amazing!

[@diegobrando3409]

You forgot the move where spiderman upper cuts enemies and sends them almost 8 feet in the air. A punch with that much for behind it would not only cause brain damage, but will rip all your neck muscles like putty, shard your teeth, and completely disconnect your neck vertebrae in two halfs. The only thing keeping your head on would be if you had thicker than normal neck muscle. However all enemies have the average build of an adult man, so yeah spiderman can literally knock your damn head off.

[@mister_lad]

Also something I like to do- I mean something Spider-man can do in the game is tie people with webs to throwable objects like those mailbox things in the street and then throw those things at a wall or at the floor at full speed. Seems pretty damaging.

[@nightingem]

Theatre kids know how to justify anything is the thing. Source: am theatre kid.

[@AlexStarkiller1]

Same but usually it's how to turn not murder INTO murder so I'm lost here.

[@Nugcon]

Theater kids should become lawers

[@bearfaery737]

Ran into the knife.

[@translarrybutz]

Dear evan hansen and spring awakening spoilers Common fandom excuses Uuummm Evan he just...... has anxiety........ he didnt MEAN to manipulate a grieving family....... he just wanted to get out of the situation, he is a GOOD GUY And Connor? Yeah, he wasnt abusive AT ALL, hes just a misunderstood tol bean uwu And Melchior? He just didnt understand what he was doing, he didnt understand the emotional aspects of smex, hes just as uneducated as Wendla Ok we done

[@enbybunny9940]

Justify this Spider man burns down a warehouse used for money laundering with every criminal involved still inside with no available exits because he webbed the doors shut

[@thecuchikiller]

3:35 I love that punchline after many "Well, that's just self-defense".

[@watahmelawn9282]

I always thought the snapping neck finisher was him making the bad guys punch themselves

[@otaviocavalo4453]

This is what I love most about this game, the moderate amount of violence. Peter Parker doesn't hurt a butterfly, but Spiderman does, cuz he needs to. It is not like Spidey wants to kill anyone, but being a hero is extremelly dangerous and he can't be gentle with thugs

[@Hannah-xh2cc]

the zooms on this were so good holy shit

[@jakinluk2513]

Game director: remember, spider man doesn't kill Combat designer: spider man always kills. Gotcha

[@philippebeauchamp2827]

If there's no blood, it's not a murder, right? Ain't that how it works?

[@yellobanana6456]

"Your honor, it's not murder because the victim fucking deserved it"

[@emperorjoker9240]

Spider-Man, much like Kiryu, has never killed everyone.

[@RamenNoodlez347]

Last one made me genuinely laugh. Good work man! You’ve earned a subscriber

[@No-vq1iv]

There's also the fact that the "safety web" doesn't seem to work like half... like 90% of the time. In fact it seems like the higher up you are the less likely it is to work, I guess it's not murder if you don't see them hit the ground?

[@Manu-yw2nu]

Insomniac! Spider-Man, Deadpool and The Punisher working together would be a crossover to kill for!!

[@vincentwoodhead6411]

That van explosion actually made me gasp

[@brixle1306]

2:40 The way he leaps off of rooftops and flips backwards to face the camera before falling into a head first dive is just FULL of the exaggerated swagger of a black teen.

[@moopshcelroy]

think, Brian, think

[@TheLegendofphantom]

"Think Brian, think" LMAO this is some comedy gold. 2nd to last one had me absolutely laughing like a madman

[@Mystravian]

I think the neck snap is actually him making them punch themselves.

[@therealdmoneyy]

Broooooo, thank god. He's not like others that take way too long to show the scene or get to the point.

[@magnamerda1]

You can tell that BDG's brother either is or was a public defender, and bless that work all the way to the dang grave

[@mariosmithjr.3298]

2:16 if you look closely the snap neck finisher it’s not a next step at all the webbing is actually around the persons fist and forearm so when he pulls it they actually punch themselves in the face knocking them out

[@Loalrikowki]

I see Spiderman has been taking tips from also very good not-at-all-murder-boi Batman.

[@heathdionne7717]

When I first started playing it, during the car accident side mission, I webbed a bunch of guys to the side of the vehicle you flip over to save a person. It was dark