Starting over - Day 1 - Opiate Withdrawal - Percocet Withdrawal

I'm starting over, Day one. I've got a positive attitude this time, I'm reloaded, laced up, and ready to fight.
Thanks for the support, guys
Peace and good vibes! 💛
Jay

[@Tote-ln4ls]

1 year 4 months off opiates. I remember watching these videos never making it past 14 days clean myself personally. Every day pushing back the truth which is and always has been WE ALL KNOW WHAT WE NEED TO DO we need the courage to say Goodbye to something that was there for us in the dark comforting us with warmth and making us feel what we long for...happiness. Saying goodbye was the hardest thing for me. But like that High school break up that you thought you would never get over...time truly heals all. I wish you each the Happiness i found on the other side.

[@TheseFourWalls]

CONGRATULATIONS! And there is so much truth to this comment, I have to pin it. ✌🙏💪😊 Rock on, my friend! And thanks for this comment! Kudos!!

[@Managerie]

Its a totally different world when your on that crap!! and when coming off is horrifying. Im talking depression × 1000 I've got over 2 years clean thank goodness anybody up that struggling you got this

[@neo7566]

Man, your animals help you so much. They help get through the pain and bring you such comfort. My baby girl helped me get off Tramadol. Hang in there. YOU CAN DO IT.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks so much for the supportive comment. Yes, our animals help a lot, and bring much needed comfort. Thanks for watching and commenting; and CONGRATULATIONS for your success in getting off the Tramadol. ✌😊

[@rockinroberta9925]

I’ve been going through the same things. I have to focus on me, I can’t expect others to be on the same page as me. Recovery is hard. I am learning not to have expectations with others. Round 2 baby!!! Xoxoox No matter what just keep being honest. You’re on the right track.

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm gonna keep Rockin! I'm reloaded, and ready to do this shit for ME! Xoxoxo 💛 Thank you for inspiring me to keep it real. With myself, and with others. 😊

[@CMoore8539]

One good thing is the fact that you are coming off of short acting opiates. They will be out of your system very soon. By this time next week, you should be feeling a whole lot Better!!!😊♥️ Stay Strong, Warrior. Thank you for your honesty and keeping it Real.♥️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks, Cindy. Your kindness, and faith in me... It truly warms me. I appreciate everyone's support, and I won't ever take it for granted. I recognise that I'm so lucky to have this new recovery family, cheering me on. It makes all the difference. 💛💪😊

[@CMoore8539]

These Four Walls, I really appreciate your honesty. Keeping it Real is a Huge Part Of Recovering. You got this. Lots of Love and Respect.♥️✌️

[@heathermcclain4497]

Can anyone please let me know if you guys are there still?.I want to go cold turkey but it will help if I have some support

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm here to support you, in any way I can. I'm not a doctor, and going cold turkey can be dangerous, depending on what you're drug of choice is. Feel free to email me at Zennorjd82 at gmail dot com. (Sorry I had to write it that way. It won't let me link my email.) I'm proud of you for making this decision to fight for your life back. Much love and respect, friend. ✌

[@heathermcclain4497]

@@TheseFourWalls I've been taking lortab 10 mg for 5 years but I break them in half and take them and Percocet but I just want to be done but I don't want to kill myself either detoxing at home so I guess I shouldn't do that huh?:(

[@kevinwells3864]

Day 18 off Percs. It has been a battle. But I promise you that it gets easier. My battle is now the mental battle. I get frustrated because I'm not sure what happiness feels like anymore. But lots of vitamins and taking time to myself has helped. Stay focused and remember the reason why you want to quit!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks so much for you comment. Congratulations on 18 days off the Percs! That's awesome! I'm on day 35 today. It's been a battle, but you're right. The battle is mental, at this point. I'm relearning how to be happy as well. It feels like having to relearn how to live life again, and it is frustrating. But I'm just so happy to be feeling again. I was numb for 13 years. So it's hard dealing with life sober now... Cuz it's so new. But I'm practicing patience with myself, and that's been helping. Staying sober one day at a time is a MUCH easier thought to deal with right now. Stay strong, man. And thanks for the support. 💪😊✌

[@kevinwells3864]

@@TheseFourWalls 35 days is AWESOME!! You are looking better brother! I was a year clean and let depression put me right back to using again. Its a slippery slope we face. But it's so worth keeping up the fight. You are right about feeling again. My brain is trying to cope with having all these emotions again. But I feel like feeling any emotions is better than none!

[@danielarias8311]

Kevin Wells you nailed it. That is what I go through when I’m trying to quit. What is my happiness now after these pills?

[@FransceneJK98]

How long do the mental cravings last??? Do they ever go away

[@Mayorewey12]

McCauley Caulkin

[@TheseFourWalls]

😂 I hear that all the time. ✌😊

[@laurakutzler7432]

Literally thought so too

[@goawayandlearnsomedamnmann1391]

@@TheseFourWalls it's interesting because I don't see the resemblance, I think he's much more attractive than Macauley but everyone has different tastes and opinions 😊

[@TheseFourWalls]

💛☺💛

[@quaneshamajette7621]

@@goawayandlearnsomedamnmann1391 yeah way cuter than mculley but they could be like brothers for real

[@CMoore8539]

You look Much Better today. Jason, I had to cut a lot of people out of my life. All healthy people have to. Stay Strong and keep going. I’m very proud of you.

[@sarabrown5011]

Part of being in recovery!!! Slip ups happen. Don't get yoursslf down over it. You're learning and accepting you messed up and thats a sign you're ready for change. Have you considered suboxone and then taper down when you feel ready? It saved my life and many others too. I couldnt stay clean cold turkey...i tried and tried and kept fucking up and gave the MAT program a chance and it changed my life. Better days are coming. Keep your head up!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for your comment, and the support. I'm actually on a waiting list for Suboxone treatment, just in case I need it. So, that's kind of my plan B right now. I'm so glad it helped you. I know several people that it literally saved. 😊

[@MaineReactor]

Making me so proud Jason! You are already learning new life skills, even with a relapse, there are very important lessons to be learned and you seem very aware of your thoughts and how your actions are swayed by those thoughts. I have found recovery much like a process of learning how to think differently and positively, now I am not saying I do this 100% of the time, but I am ultra aware of how my addict brain constantly tries to sabotage every decision I make. As I progress in my recovery, making positive decisions becomes a bit easier. Recovery is hard work and it honestly gets overwhelming sometimes brotha but when it does, I sit and take deep breaths and tell myself, “You are ok Shane. You are overreacting and over analyzing everything. You are fine, everything’s fine.” May sound dumb but it honestly calms me down. I force myself to smile and within a minute or two I forget what even triggered my anxiety in the first place. Recovery has forced me to really dig deep Jason and learn things about myself I had forgot over time due to opiate use. Thanksgiving day, I met up with my first friend, my buddy Braden who I have known my entire life and he means the world to me. I got to spend a couple hours on Thanksgiving with my best friend and then with my family the rest of the day. This sounds normal to most people, but to me this was huge. Truly enjoying my holidays with friends and family again and realizing how huge this is and how fulfilling it is. You have so much to look forward to Jason! I was just like you man, I didn’t leave my house unless I absolutely had to for many years. Today most of my anxiety comes from not being able to sit still and trying to find something, anything to do! 🤣 Keep believing in yourself bro and you are going to be successful and happy. Let people know, I am gonna feel like shit for a while, but I am getting better and being a dish rag for a month or so is what I have to do to get healthy again. Your brain will reach homeostasis bud, mine has not reached it yet but I know it will eventually and I focus on how far I have come so I acknowledge my progress. Like I said, it is a different way of thinking about everything. Be patient with yourself my friend. I have 100% faith in you as I am sure you can see, you remind me of myself in how mentally aware you are. I also struggle with being stuck in my own head and being over concerned about what people think of me. I am learning how to deal with that as well... it’s a trip man, just stay motivated and NEVER give up! Always here bud! Peace and love! ✌🏼❤️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Shane, you're a constant reminder to me of where I can be, if I just put my mind to it. I can't wait to start feeling again. The good AND the bad, frankly. I had just numbed everything for soooo long that I had forgotten how to process, I think... and I felt flooded with emotion, all at once... and I kept trying to push it away. I fell into my old routine, of trying to please everyone, and try to pretend I'm doing great, and everything's super... When I should have just been facing shit, and admitting that I was having a hard time. (And the damn benzos... I never should have taken them. I should have toughed it out, which I plan on doing this time.) I want, so badly, to enjoy the simple things in life... The things that used to bring me so much joy... The things I took for granted back then. But, I know I'll get there. I'm working my way back up... Rewiring this brain of mine, that got jammed up 13 years ago. I'm accepting the fact that it's gonna take awhile. I'm in a better headspace this time. I've got all my tools lined up, and I know what to use, and when to use it. Oh, and I got a sponser, which it great! So, I feel like it's coming together. Finally. Thanks so much for sharing your story with me. Reading your comments, being able to identify, and realising I have a new friend who understands cuz he's been there, and who's cheering me on... man, it means the world to me. Thank you. 😊🙏

[@MaineReactor]

You are welcome man! I am always here like I said bud. I work but I always see my comments so if you ever need something man just shoot me a comment and I will try to answer as fast as possible for you. You have a friend in me man and I got your back! You are gonna get through this! Get some rest if you can! Peace and love! ✌🏼❤️

[@filgood76]

Glad you're back on track. One day at the time bro😊

[@backbudbonsai]

I’m just about to start my attempt at getting clean…….. 17yrs of opiate abuse, at my worst I was gobbling 240mgs of perc 30s a day (some snorting of em too). Then I was on suboxone for 6yrs. I got off subs but quickly relapsed AGAIN with Vicodins…….. and I hate myself for it!!!! My issue is ALL MENTAL! But of course there is some physical dependence too…… I’ve been “dirty” for 4 months now and I’m scared I’m gonna get too deep again!!!! I know this video is 4yrs old, but I hope you have found peace and happiness, we all deserve peace and happiness………. Sometimes I think that I don’t though. Idk……… I am hopeful for the day that I can be normal/happy WITHOUT drugs or drinking!

[@TheseFourWalls]

I believe in you, my friend. You are stronger than the drugs. You are worth the good life, and you deserve all the best. 🙏🏻

[@MyBenzoHell]

Seems like just yesterday 😮 glad to still know you since day #1 I love this community it’s so special to me. Proud of you pal 💪👊

[@TheseFourWalls]

Same here, George. It's easy to do this when you've got someone understanding what you're going thru. I understand you, my friend. And I'm mega-proud of everything you've improved in your life. 💪😊👍👊✌

[@sarah29880]

Coming from a home with a narcissistic mom, I had to tip toe around my home for 25 years not to upset her. I totally understand trying to please others before yourself. I went to grad school thinking that I had to in order to please my parents and have that “conditional” love. Since the love in my home was based on success and productivity. Well that ruined me, 100 percent. And my body just stopped functioning. If I didn’t get out of the house, it would have been bad. I feel like if we acknowledge the hard times and feelings then it’s a form of letting go of that control that we all so desperately want. By not running away from feelings and confronting these it eases the process. Just allowing what is to be and not judging the feelings, letting it kinda do its thing helps release it. This actually breads mental toughness and even changes the way one looks at life in general. I can get to this place but it takes hard work. Each time I stress myself out again I have to find a way to bring my body back each time to a better place. You seem like you are in a good place right now. Keep doing whatever it is you are doing 💜💜. I know it still must suck but you can get through it.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for sharing a bit of your story, Sarah. We have a lot of similarities. I'm approaching this "round two" of my recovery differently. I have to do this my way, setting boundaries with certain loved ones. And it's something I've never done before, but I know I must. In order to get better.... Thanks for your support and kindness. 💛

[@cece3194]

Hang in there. It's not easy. We are not perfect although others seem to think we should be. . Don't give up. People care.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for understanding, and being so supportive. :)

[@cece3194]

Can you sign up for suboxone?@@TheseFourWalls

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@cece3194 I'm on a waiting list. I'm hoping I can do it without, but am open to the idea. I've seen it really save some people.

[@tammymacdougall6915]

Your cat looks just like mine! Keep up the good work you CAN do this and I wish you the very best. What you are doing is the best thing for you.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you so very much, for your kind and encouraging comment. I actually just recently celebrated one year clean. ✌😊🎉🎊 Happy Holidays!

[@techchick3485]

I just found your channel while looking up Percocet withdrawal. I totally relate to you here. Especially how you want to help others and end up exhausted. I'll be watching your other video's. This is inspiring to me as I myself need to start taking my meds as prescribed or I will just have to stop taking them at all. I'll follow your future video for inspiration. Stay strong 😊👊

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm so glad you found me, thanks so much for your comment and for being here! I started this channel to talk about my mental health struggles, and it kinda morphed into a recovery channel. I've received so much support and kindness through the comments and connections I've made with others, and I'm now almost 4 months sober. So, reaching out to others who understand the struggle has been really beneficial for me. 😊 Thanks for your supportive comment.

[@alirpa77]

You’re doing so well! I’d stay down for weeks/months before I got back up - as is common for so many of us. So you’re such a success story for hopping right back on! I’m rooting for you. 💕💙

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for supporting me! The support means so much to me, You have no idea! 💛😊💛

[@alirpa77]

You’re welcome! And oh Honey, yes I do. ;)

[@jaimereynolds258]

Beautiful kitty. It is nice to see you smile.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you, Jaime, for the continued kindness and support. Round two, here I come. I'm pumped, and ready to do this!

[@1060michaelg]

For anyone seeing this now...Do Not go off benzos cold turkey. There is a real danger of checking out, rolling a 7---Dying. It happened to me more than once. If you've been on benzos for a good while, let's just say a year for the sake of discussion (although 6 months would be enough)...it will take at least a couple of years of SLOW tapering to get there...maybe longer. GREAT VIDEO, TFW!! How are you now?

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yes, great advice! Benzos are no joke to just try hopping off. I'm so glad you're still here, my friend, and able to share your advice, experiences with us. 🙏

[@angel-sm2iy]

Been there

[@angel-sm2iy]

I was on for 10 year, yes 10! I decided to put myself in the hospital and finally come of safely and they took me off cold turkey and I started having silent seizures and they had to give me a short term med to stop the seizures.

[@1060michaelg]

@@TheseFourWalls I am afraid I bungled the affair...could you do the friend request hassle again? I am very sorry---I DO take it seriously. Thanks!

[@1060michaelg]

@@angel-sm2iy My mind boggles at the fact that you are even still WITH us, angel! For a HOSPITAL to try cold turkey on a long term benzo patient...no matter he dosel=gambling with your life! That the "war on drug" (read: war on pain patients and physicians) has completely taken over the philosophy of the hospital, even in oncology...it is a shameful, lost cause and a return to barbarism.

[@TheEdoardoCC]

Im actually going through percocet withdrawals right now. Its been one and a half say since i took the last pill . I hope i can do it without going crazy and trying to find a way to get some more pills

[@TheseFourWalls]

You're stronger than you think, my friend. (Especially now.) The first 8 days were hell on earth. But it slowly began getting easier. It becomes a mental battle after that. Finding support is #1. (Feel free to reach out to me if you need to talk or vent.) Making new coping skills is also key. Find what works best for you... (I go to online meetings at intherooms, I talk to friends, call my sponser, listen to music, watch horror movies, write down all the reasons I want to be sober.... It's all about finding what distracts you the best, while your brain is healing. Best of luck, my friend. Remember, recovery isn't always perfect. We fall. But slips can be filled with lessons... To expect instant perfection can set you up to feel like a failure. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING; if you relapse, tell someone, and then get right back up and try again... don't be ashamed or discouraged, because that isn't going to help. You're a warrior. Don't forget that. And I, for one, am proud of you. ✌

[@jamesforest5245]

TheEdwardCC what happened

[@NTiVE-tq7tj]

I feel your pain bruh i been on pills since early 2017 and i quit in 2018 for 2 months felt so amazing then i relapsed after a gym injury now since 2018 ive tried 3 times to quit and outta the 3 trys my longest was 2 weeks now i cant make it past 24hrs it feels like death!

[@TheEdoardoCC]

@@NTiVE-tq7tj i exactly know how you feel. I relapsed again . And right now Im getting it again prescribed from my doctor. And honestly I just stopped thinking to get off of then

[@TheEdoardoCC]

@@NTiVE-tq7tj how are you feeling now?

[@lynnpatenaude5548]

I completely understand you when you talk about putting a face for everyone. I hope I can start my detox but I’m afraid of doing it alone. I have no family and no friends. You should be proud of yourself!!!!

[@dredre8103]

It's my day one today I feel like shit already. I'm not looking forward for tomorrow but I'm gonna try my hardest to fight that shit. Wish me luck.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey man, I'm proud of you for soldiering through your first day. Those first 3 to 4 days (and nights) are a living hell. It's kinda like our rite of passage tho... We've gotta walk through the fire, and experience all the bullshit, so that we can get to the other side - and remember I never want to go through that shit again.... Having support helps, especially in early recovery. I'm here if you need someone to talk to, my friend. I'm now 7 months sober (minus one day I slipped.) I know how hard it is, going thru what you're going thru. So I'm sending you all my best wishes and strength.... And my respect, for facing this shit head-on. It's not easy... but once you get past the beginning withdrawal, it's all mental after that. You can do this. Give it everything you've got, and take care of yourself. You're a warrior! Don't be afraid to reach out. We all need support. Keep me updated, and remember, I'm here if you want some support. Zennorjd82 @gmail .com

[@TheseFourWalls]

How are you doing, my friend?

[@heathermcclain4497]

Hey I hope you guys are well and I am going to go cold turkey so if you guys have any advice please let me know so I can stay strong and start ASAP

[@1060michaelg]

These Four Walls Never be concerned of a lengthy comment, Jason--- I really deeply appreciate one who is generous with their language. So many aren't! (one of the many dark dividends of the "social" media) Your words and sharing of yourself so freely have touched me. I somehow KNEW you would be a devotee of Uncle Bill! All of my Burroughs books are taped together from MANY readings...Oh, have you read The Letters of William S. Burroughs 1945-1959? If not you MUST get a hold of it (you'll probably have to order it). This priceless collection of letters, mostly from Burroughs to Allen Ginsberg, literally shows us the development of William the writer. The letters are delightfully bawdy and often hysterically funny! In the letters we find the "routines" that would be included in NAKED LUNCH, and also the back and forth battle to publish JUNKY. I only recommend it to people I know really appreciate the man. Another quote that just hit me (from JUNKY), concerning junk sickness; "A man might die simply because he could not stand to remain in his own body." Whoa! That was me every couple of months or so...you know how it starts; you do an inventory and let's say it's pills---and you're way short. That's when JUNKIE MATH kicks in..."Well, I'll treat myself tonight---150 mg. and 3mg Xanax, watch "Junky's Christmas" on KZbin...ahh. Now TOMORROW? Time for austerity program, DAMMIT!! I'll cut the rest of these in HALF...then the halves in half...then...Oh shit I am IN IT! AGAIN! This didn't work last month or the month before...hey, I know; I'll do one day on and tough it out the next...get some Robotussin DM, that nasty Kratom (Jesus wept!)...Oh shit...I am really IN IT!!" Thanks for your pinning my comment, Jason. Listen, I don't do this, but here is my email: [e-mail] OR Michael Groetzinger on Facebook just send me a friend request. It's just that I think we have a lot in common and it's rare to encounter someone you want to hear from again. Let me know...If that's not your thing, I won't have hurt feelings...Talk to you soon.

[@scottpayne4969]

Keep on keeping on Jason, you can do it! GOD loves you and will help you, Talk to him and reach out to him! He will help.....GUARANTEED! Already said a prayer for you, GOD bless,

[@TheseFourWalls]

🙏 Thank you so much, my friend.

[@danielarias8311]

I would like to know how you made it out. I am watching this video and going through the same thing only a year after you.

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm sorry, friend. I just noticed this comment. I made it out by building up a support system. That was most important. I'm here to support you in any way I can. If you want to talk, or have any questions, my email is Zennorjd82 at gmail dot com (sorry, it wouldn't let me link my email, so I had to write it out that way.) I have faith that you can do this, my friend. 💪😊✌ Much respect to you. And, again, sorry for not seeing this comment sooner. Hope you're well.

[@evalu3260]

Cute kitty. Has your eyes. 😍

[@TheseFourWalls]

😊💖

[@CherylLynnAKALopez]

Yep , u do everything to make everyone happy and ur not , now u need to really get to the point when u realize you have to be true to yourself, I see how strong u are , YOU can do this , get around the people who will help you walk this journey ur on to recovery, those are the people that what u to seceded. You look better today and a little more determined....you can make it ...keep moving forward and dont get discouraged it's not that we fell that matters.....its how we GET BACK UP !

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you for your comment. The support from people like you, and the kindness, is so appreciated. I'm going into this second attempt with a much better attitude, and a better awareness of my triggers. Thanks for following my journey, and cheering me on. 😊💛

[@kellyandersen3856]

God bless you. You have great wisdom

[@travisclymer4481]

I’ve had to even cut off people from AA/Recovery cuz they were too toxic! Put yourself first always! You can’t pour from an empty cup.

[@PED19777]

wow, you look remarkebly calm for someone who is on their first day, i have had first days- many of them, come back when your ready to talk WITHDRAWL on day 60, and how long have you used opiates? not that its a competition, i dont want to see anyone with an opiate withdrawl, , however you have to do it right. what you need to think about. 1- a doctor 1b- Do NOT In jest benzodiazapines then inject opiates(including methadone), this is the number 1 killer in my area as Valium and such drugs depress the respiratory system and you just stop breathing, don't do it! 2-something to do( cause you aint high anymore!!) trust me your going to want to think about number 2 3-aha, just when i say number 2, you should be prepared to have some discomfort in your stomach after a couple of days, you MUST force the toilet out if your not running(that's later!) 4-Bath salts for those late nights, yeah guys us too, when your 4 days into withdrawal and you go for a bath, you almost feel human again. 5-i'm gonna stress the importance of something to do, if you have been on opiates years and tried to come off then youll know how important it is, Ive quit like 3 times out of boredom 6-(preference)DO NOT GO ON METHADONE ...this should never have been invented, this is a chemical that is way worse then Percocet damn- even heroin. if your using opiates see number 1 7-Be ready 8-why now? 9-How ya gonna cope on day 30 cleaning cat shit up? just sayin, she/he will help but having someone to help is a good idea. 10- keep positive listen percocet isn't a hard opiate to kick , but it is still an opiate so be careful. this is me on 4 months at 16mls of methadone, i only used heroin for 2 years, i have been on Methadone for 20 years Its my worst addiction ever, try and avoid methadone if you can, i was on 60mls for the last 7 years gradualy reducing this year in 5ml increments 4/52(monthly) then down to 2ml every 4/52, got another 2 weeks then come down to 14mls, damn gets boreing... listen this is 2019, how did you get on? would love to hear that you did it, all the very best for the future, and enjoy life people, drugs are for mugs.TRUE Listen my friend, relapse is on the way to recovery, you may relapse a few times before you finally quit, positive mind is good! I have a dog and she is great, out at 4am wandering the streets in my area your asking to be arrested just for being suspicious so my dog does really help, ive had a few run ins with police at night but after they search me and i tell them whats going on, they have been good, 2 stopped me the other day and I never got searched but they were like super awesome, i had to tell them i couldnt remember them lol, sleep deprivation is hardcore lol, anyway, now all those friends i have(the ones that have not died) i have had to cut myself off from because those were my triggers, now im lonely siting on youtube withdrawing like crazy, but hey not long now right!!...... Every relapse is a learning curve, youll do better next time, the fact that you actually realize that you have relapsed is good and then you go again, never give up brother. How ya doin bros and sis's be safe, your all beautiful people. song in here kzbin.info/www/bejne/jKarh42VYsdrbJo for encouragement plus i wanna listen to it !!! bye and good luck and this is a classic full length for version when you just feel like shit enjoy, and its a classic and it has helped me more kzbin.info/www/bejne/iqfRiqCNpamSipo

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks so much for this comment. I got to 6 and a half months sober, after releasing this video... But unfortunately had a relapse the other day. But, I confessed it to everyone, I'm working harder with my sponser, and I'm right back on track. Thank you for sharing your hard earned wisdom/advice. ✌

[@Delveinformation1]

You are a brave man, at least at the point that I'm watching.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you for your comment, friend. It's certainly hard to put yourself out here, and be vulnerable for thousands to see and judge... But despite the ruts, stumbles and set-backs, I've been (freely) given so much love and support by total strangers (who now feel like family) and my main goal now is to help others see what life can be on the other side of addiction, once they're ready to begin their journey. Thanks, Jonas, for kindly commenting.

[@shanmitch205]

Hi 👋 how are you doing if I may ask how did your recovery process go I hope all is well and you beat the withdrawals I know it’s not easy but when you take control of your life it makes the process and life so much better I hope your okay 😉

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm almost 8 months sober, and life is still tough. But, one day at a time, I'm getting there. Thank you for your support. ✌

[@dawnie]

you got this.

[@DuckGoddies]

God bless u brother

[@piercedxangel]

I'm on day 5 of oxycodone withdrawal. I have taken them for over 2 years for back pain from a tractor trailer accident. I literally can't drink water, I feel electricity pulsing through my body & I'm just done. I have been using Klonopin to help me sleep but I feel like they really dont do anything but help with sleep & RLS. I just want it to be over at this point.

[@TheseFourWalls]

I believe in you, friend.

[@gattiyon]

sucks man. I feel for ya man , hope youre doing good.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for the comment, friend! I'm coming up on one year sober next month. ✌☺

[@danielalmond1932]

How did everything go with you ? 🙏I tought you seems such a sympatic guy. Bless and prayers from Norway ❤️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you for the kind words. I'm doing well. I've been sober for over 2 and a half years, with two relapses that only lasted two days each, and then I got right back on track. The kindness of strangers has been an enormous help. Kindness, love, and support can turn everything around for someone. Thanks for showing your kind support, my friend. ✌☺

[@lilshoota19]

First day off 30mg perc feeling great so far

[@TheseFourWalls]

Keep fighting hard, my friend

[@SAMEntalhealth]

It really is tough...... dark place

[@TheseFourWalls]

I know it's tough, my friend. Support really helps. I'm here if you need to talk, or have any questions. I'm proud of you. Stay strong.

[@SAMEntalhealth]

Checking up, update???

[@noellemerry514]

Luna is lovely! But you are the focus...and you will push on!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you for the positivity, and for the support. I really appreciate it. (And Luna appreciates the compliment.) 😊✌

[@honeyd1p353]

❤️

[@gio1985s]

I'm on hour 36 and it's already a battle 😔

[@TheseFourWalls]

The first 2-3 days are the toughest, in my opinion. Congratulations on reclaiming your life. I'm proud of you. Even if you slip, and have to get back up, I'm proud of you. There's no judgement here, just support. ✌

[@Grozzny_dov]

How is it going so far my friend give us a update.

[@MaineReactor]

Oh and check out Tim Johnson on youtube bro! This man has some amazing videos and wisdom!

[@dontforgettolike7127]

How ya doing bud? Did you kick it? All the best.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey friend! November 23ed, it'll be one year. (Minus a few lapses, that never lasted longer than a day.) I finally feel I'm on the other side it. And life looks so much better. Thanks again for your supportive comment!

[@muk420425]

These Four Walls hope you’re feeling alright man. Allot of people don’t talk about the long term. It took me almost 2 years to feel like a normal human again. I spent 10 years smoking oxy and heroin. All the best my man. 👍🤘💪

[@SAMEntalhealth]

I suffer from major depressive disorder it's so hard on or off drugs.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yes, I imagine that's increadably hard to cope with. Do you take medication for your depression? And see a therapist? And getting off drugs can at least balance out some of the lows... Well, what I mean is is going to be easier to find the best remedies (medications, exercise, diet, things like that) and the right balance, when you're clean. I believe in you, my friend. ✌

[@SAMEntalhealth]

@@TheseFourWalls I'm now a week clean and never going back to opiates ;-)

[@TheseFourWalls]

Congratulations!! You're a warrior, and I'm super proud of you. Reach out if you need any encouragement, advice or support.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Also, check out intherooms.com for added support. 🙏🙏

[@monicamorris4212]

Tomorrow I'm gonna start day 1 again...had 7 months clean then relapsed for 1 month. Made it to day 3 last week and gave in. Gonna start again tomorrow, my DOC is fetty btw..

[@TheseFourWalls]

I believe in you. You can do this, friend. You're so much stronger than you realize. 🙏🏻

[@SAMEntalhealth]

My man your room is way too depressing with the shade lol

[@jacobbrill3729]

Dsutphin91 Ds my room asf. Moved to a new house right b4 I detoxed and the lighting was terrible and had black furniture and a town where I knew no one. Being sober without friends all the sudden coming off of a 2 year addiction of snorting fentanyl and oxy at 19 years old is so hard. Feel like I’m in hell.

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@jacobbrill3729 Hey friend, sorry I didn't see this message till now. How are you doing with your recovery journey? Don't be frustrated with yourself if you're not currently where you want to be. Every small victory is massive when it comes to getting sober. Two years ago, I had ideations of death every night. I was so miserable with life, I just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up. Every day was the same. Kinda like the movie Groundhogs Day, but more like if it was written by Stephen King. Today, almost two years later, I am happier than I've been in 14 years, which is when I first got hooked on pills. We're stronger creatures than we believe, and than we give ourselves credit for. 💪☺🙏

[@robertolopez2282]

I love you bro

[@TheseFourWalls]

Love right back at you, brother. ✌

[@CMoore8539]

Jason, please check out Derek Lambert. He’s making some Awesome Live Streams this weekend. It’s Very Helpful and Informative. Take good care of you, and stay Strong.♥️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yes, I've jyst discovered his videos and watched his live stream! Very inspirational guy!

[@Ron-ec4pf]

Quit last week and it's rough. I'ma stay sober

[@TheseFourWalls]

The first twoYou're a warrior. Reach out if you need to talk/vent. Welcome back to your life. ☺

[@kerryirving2949]

Wish you the best Jason. Like I said your trying- which my ex never did

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you, Kerry! Yes, I'm trying even harder this time. Thanks for your continued support. 💛

[@JAMESk3gs]

I am terrified of turning back into an alcoholic when I quit heroin

[@TheseFourWalls]

I believe in you. Your a warrior, man. I'm here if you every need to chat.

[@deweycrim8097]

I can’t get past day one so way to go dude.

[@TheseFourWalls]

I failed getting past "day one" many, many, MANY times. The more frequently I got back up, and kept trying, the stronger I got.... It's like a series of wires crossed... But you'll get there, when you're ready, and your life will "reboot" in the best way. 🙏👍 I believe in you, my friend.

[@NTiVE-tq7tj]

Same here and i tried kratom took like 30 capsules of reds and malay and didnt feel a thing my heart started pounding and bad bad cold sweats and body aches i had to get back on pills its harder now ive done it before 2yrs ago i quit for 2 months then relapsed and ive tried 3 times since and its hard now i can barely go 24hrs cold turkey i feel like im gonna die so im gonna try again soon

[@tango-bravo]

Is it possible to have withdrawal symptoms after taking 15 5mg Percosets over a 15 day period in the wake of surgical recovery?

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yes, it's possible. But they shouldn't be bad, nor should they last long. It would just feel like the flu. Thanks for watching, friend.

[@JeffreyZak-c7w]

Hope you doing good now

[@TheseFourWalls]

Coming up on 4 years sober! 🙏🏻 We do recover.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you for your comment. Thanks for watching, friend.

[@susannec659]

Hi Jason. I don't think you should be hung up on day one kind of thing and sober dates and stuff like that this is really not day one this is just part of the journey that you have begun last week.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you, that's true. That's a better way of looking at it. :)

[@annaespinoza4305]

Don't know how bad want to get off but I always make the excuse I need to lower my doses before I stop and withdraw the withdraws suks and it's harder cuz all I do is want to lay in bed give me 4 days and I'm gonna comment on how I'm doin

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yes, my friend, withdrawing truly dose suck, and getting down as low as you can before jumping is always best. But I know that you can successfully do this, Anna. For me, it came down to wanting it bad enough ... Wanting soberity more than anything else. Now, I've had bad days where I've slipped up... But, overall, the person I was three years ago is gone... I've just been left with the lessons. I have faith in you, friend. Keep fighting! 💪😊🙏

[@wendyrowland17]

Are you still on here for support or advice? Thank You 🙏 much love 💕 and support

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hello friend. Thank you for your kind, supportive comment. And yes, I'm still here for anyone needing advice and/or support. I've just had a lot less time to upload and respond, due to some family issues. But I'm here - never hesitate to reach out. 🙏 Much love & support in return! 💙✌

[@mariadavis3832]

you look like that guy "Tyler" that does celebrity readings

[@TheseFourWalls]

😂 I've heard that kid, and the kid from Home Alone. Lol

[@MaineReactor]

kzbin.info/door/ZWNH10D7ztlDASSApHTzZg Tim Johnsons channel!

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm gonna check this out now, Thanks for suggesting. :)

[@MaineReactor]

Yeah man, his videos are very inspiring! Hope you enjoy them! He is active in the recovery family and will answer his comments too so I wanted to share this channel with you. Roberta actually introduced me to his channel! Proud of ya man!

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@MaineReactor Very inspirational videos! I'm already binge-watching before going to bed... Filling my head up with some positivity. :) Thanks for sharing and thanks for everything. 🙏😊

[@MaineReactor]

Anytime man!

[@NTiVE-tq7tj]

Honest question bro you still sober? I know how pills can be and we all end up fallin off the wagon

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey, my friend. Yes, I'm over 2 and a half years sober. I had two set backs (fell off the wagon for a day, twice, but got right back up, with the help of my sponser). It certainly feels good feeling life again... The good and the bad. I can handle hard times now... And the good times are really good. Thanks for asking, and checking in, my friend. I appreciate it. ✌

[@SAMEntalhealth]

How long were you addicted?

[@TheseFourWalls]

I was addicted for over 13 years. I've now been clean a year and 45 days. ✌

[@Butterfly4675]

@@TheseFourWalls you're so lucky! I can't wait to be there hun...

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@Butterfly4675 Yes, you WILL be here! I believe in you, and am proud that you're making the first steps. Kudos to you, my friend. ✌🙏😊 Congratulations on taking the first steps.

[@SAMEntalhealth]

@@TheseFourWalls oh wow 13 years damn you outweigh mine sheesh. You doing ok? I just commented to check up

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yeah, I'm still going strong! I've actually gained 30 pounds as well, so I feel like a new man, with a brand new chance at life.

[@memyselfi5994]

Please take care of yourself!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for the kind comment, my friend. I'm doing really well. I've now been sober for over 2 and a half years. ✌🙏

[@idunno512]

Christ - imagine going back to day 1. No thank you

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yeah, starting all over was horrible; and it's something I'd now never go back to. I've been sober for 2 and a half years now, and life's truly been great! ✌

[@amyburns5199]

Anyone tried that new drug that helps lucmyra??

[@TheseFourWalls]

I don't know anyone that's tried it personally. But I've read really promising things about it helping opiate dependency. 😊✌

[@ShawnTylerMusic]

Jason! How are you bro?!

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm doing well, man. Thanks for checking in. Just dealing with difficulties in my personal life ... dealing with shit sober, so yay for that ... But, FUCK. Some days are harder than others ... But today's a good day, so I'ma smile, count my blessings, and focus on the gratitude. How you been? Hope you're well, friend.

[@1060michaelg]

Jason---If I dropped the ball receiving your F request---I SWEAR I saw it and was sure I confirmed it but my memory is Screwed!! We can all relate to that malady, yes? If I am mistaken...no worries. I hope you are doing Exceedingly well and that your holidays were Great...they are tricky for me sometimes with melancholia...but they're over...(and I have a family around me...what a BABY I am!!!). Drop me a line...I could leave my email again but if that's not your jam, cool. Take care and keep up the important work you do, my friend!!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey friend - I was just scrolling through all the messages on this channel, and I came across this one. I see that I hearted it, but didn't respond. I wanted to first say you are NOT a baby. Mentally tricky times bring about tears, often. You're a man with an empathetic heart. And nostalgia is a funny, bittersweet thing... always comes knocking around those damn holidays. Sorry for the long delay in a response. I haven't signed on in awhile. (I think C*vid, and being couped up made people meaner. Lol.) Everytime I signed on, I would read comment after comment.... People saying I'm fuck#ed up in all my videos, telling me to "fuck off and drop dead" (that seemed a bit excessive), people saying how annoying my voice is, how ugly I am, calling me a fag. Silly, childish, bullying. It just got old. Normally stuff like that doesn't bother me, but when it's comment after comment, day after day... I just felt like taking a break, for my mental health, was the best thing to do. I've made SOOO many amazing friends on here that I try to keep in contact with, but it all just became overwhelming. I knew I needed to take a mental vacation, and then do some work on myself, so that I wasn't taking on others misery. (Or dealing with their bullying.) But I wanted to reach out to a few people, and just check in... remain connected, ya know? I hope you're doing well, my friend. Reach out anytime. ✌

[@1060michaelg]

@@TheseFourWalls Thanks, Jason--- I am a complete scatter brain lately and I think I need you to send ANOTHER friend request!! Sorry, my friend...I'm just a bona fide MESS! We will talk at length when we have our MESSENGER at long last set up...I promise to check for it in a timely manner. I think that's what happened...and strange things happen on Fb anyway (understatement).. Jason, people like us tend to be the whipping boys for a lot of angry, sometimes people who are influenced by the Dark---they see the light and they care nothing for it's well fare, just that they suck up as much of it as they can. Psychic vampires, to be sure!

[@Shawnbzilla]

🌱

[@TheseFourWalls]

🌿

[@Shawnbzilla]

I did it. 🙏 Hope you're doing well. 2 months clean now.. I remember the first day I made the decision and I found you.. It really helped me gear up for the fight. 💚 I'll never touch them again.

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@Shawnbzilla Congratulations on your two months!! And I promise you, it keeps getting easier. We're so much stronger than we think. I'm proud of you, my friend. Keep strong!

[@vegasbarbie4186]

Hey Jason, can I ask how many you were talking a day? Did you go cold turkey or did you taper at all??

[@TheseFourWalls]

I was taking 100 mgs (of Percocet) a day, and went cold turkey. I took like 10 mgs one day, and 5 the next... Then nothing but gabapentin, to help with withdrawals.

[@vegasbarbie4186]

These Four Walls ugh I take about 100mg of hydros too. I’m probably going to go through the same withdrawals you are. I heard Imodium will help curb the withdrawals

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@vegasbarbie4186 It can help, BUT don't take more than like 6 pills at once, and don't do it more than once. It can mess with your heart, so be careful. Research everything before trying anything. It didn't help me much. Detoxing in the past, when I'd go a few days not being able to get pills, I'd use small amounts of Kratom to help during the bad withdrawal moments. (Kratom is safer than popping those Imodium to feel better.) BUT, the problem is - we're addicts, right? So, we end up ABUSING Imodium and ABUSING Kratom. And one crutch becomes another. So, I'd encourage you to talk to your doctor, and tell him/her you'd like to detox off pills. If you're going to do it on your own, RESEARCH, RESEARCH, RESEARCH. Take in the advice that makes sense to you, get a support network, and be gentle with yourself. (But be prepared for some bad, sleepless nights... BUT, they end. You can get through them.) Whatever route you decide to take, there's lots of people like me, who are right here to cheer you on. 💪😉💛

[@vegasbarbie4186]

These Four Walls good to know because I was watching a video of that Cohen guy that recommended taking like 30 every couple of hours 😕

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@vegasbarbie4186 yeah, there are lots of people out there, saying that b.s. But I promise you, it'll fuck with your heart. You don't want that happening. 💛

[@dandougie363]

They left mcully home alone too long 😂🤦‍♂️

[@TheseFourWalls]

😂😂😂

[@blue-pb7mn]

Look up GABEPENTIN. It'll help more then you could imagine.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you so much for your comment! Gabapentin felt like an absolute LIFESAVER during my early recovery. Now that I'm approaching 5 months sober, I'm beginning to taper off the Gabapentin. Which is a battle in and of itself. But it helped me get to where I am. Thanks so much for commenting. 😊🌻

[@blue-pb7mn]

@@TheseFourWalls 💟💟

[@julieharrison5772]

Not true. B Gabapentin is addicting as well.

[@julieharrison5772]

@@TheseFourWalls yes definitely taper because it is addicting. 🙏

[@TheseFourWalls]

Yes, it's absolutely a drug you MUST taper off. Doctors don't really tell you that your brain and your central nervous system become dependent on the calming effect it has. And going off Gaba cold-turkey was impossible for me. I (foolishly) tried, and I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep.... I was overwhelmed by anxiety and depression. Gaba is no joke. A wonderful drug for many. But if I had to do it all over again, PERSONALLY I wouldn't have used the Gaba. I would have leaned heavily on others, and just toughed it out. ✌

[@brandycolwell747]

Can we please talk?

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey friend! My email is always open, and I'd be happy to chat with you. ✌🏼 [e-mail]

[@goawayandlearnsomedamnmann1391]

You are beautiful and strong.

[@TheseFourWalls]

🙏💛🙏

[@TheseFourWalls]

My email is Zennorjd82 at gmail dot com. (Sorry I had to write it out like that, but it blocks links.) Feel free to reach out anytime.