Steven Seagal Abnormal Moments

My original video was taken down by KZbin, I had to censor some titties and reupload it.
Viewcount on the original video was 307 488 at the time of deletion, with 4718 likes.

[@ahyman7778]

Steven Seagal is the real life version, of a 7 year old’s imagination.

[@theauditor5275]

lmao that describes him perfectly

[@miguelnieto3176]

Hahaha

[@trojan403]

Gold.

[@walroz87]

Spot on!!!

[@donQpublic]

Correct🤣

[@yemalad1.]

When he was asked about sexual assault allegations, that was the fastest he's moved since 1989

[@christiananderson4909]

I'm not going to name her, but I had a roommate that worked as a boom girl on set of one of his movies. Apparently he harrassed nearly every woman on set constantly, and grabbed her ass one day. She kicked him in the nuts and made him cry. I wasn't there, but heard the story corroborated by some of her friends that worked on the same film. He had her fired for it, but I always got the sense that she didn't mind.

[@yemalad1.]

@@christiananderson4909 he's definitely a sex pest 🤮

[@duke9974]

" Mayby faster " LOL

[@leaslangen28]

@@christiananderson4909 🤣🤡

[@mikehunt3746]

🤣🤣🤣👍

[@lowercasej23]

Steven Segal is like a living South Park character

[@xskrish]

exactly. the literal perfect description for him lmao

[@20FreeWill]

I feel like he was in southpark?

[@lowercasej23]

@@20FreeWill more than likely. if not, then they've missed a trick there, albeit an easy one

[@5891jonathan]

Cartman for sure

[@5891jonathan]

A walking D-Bag

[@jackburton7483]

"I think Steven Seagal is arguably one of the greatest martial artists of all time." - Steven Seagal

[@salvadordollyparton666]

he'd never say arguably one of... he definitely is THE greatest ever. to himself.

[@UnderTheTableGremlin]

He sat, in the same interview in which he said he correctly predicted that a bulled would be found at the scene of the obviously deceased Brandon Lee, and essentially said that all of the best artists and action stars in Hollywood were not as good as him. I 100% think he both believes that this is true (it isn’t) and that he would say this (he likely has as well). It’s like comparing clothing from Walmart to clothing from Gucci

[@lionelhutz5137]

It's all in the reflexes

[@MrJakePaddy]

Sensei Seagal would never argue about that.

[@Ljay-us7rc3ev8t]

you mean a wannabe martial artist and a bad actor to boot.

[@KaniToken]

Seagull lives by the George Costanza quote: "it's not a lie if you believe it"

[@whatlurks_]

All due respect, that quote is factual 😂

[@ethanwiley7605]

it's amazing how he speaks with whatever accent of the race of the person he's talking to. A true master of the arts

[@nunyabidness3429]

Be water my friend!

[@dariusmondolar]

The king of improv …

[@suzyqualcast6269]

Imitating actuating Mr potatoe man. Never was a hwood chublleski tho.

[@williamdolyniuk7804]

And good at self promotion..

[@maplebear6527]

Yeah we all saw Segura's bit

[@JimmyJones666]

As a "karate" master, his fighting skills are about as useful as a glass hammer.

[@1234567890a77]

The lack of self awareness in this man is beyond astonishing, no words to describe it.

[@cameroncoop7878]

exactly what I was thinking, cringy to watch him go haha! Big ups to the creator of this vid!

[@Thes4LT]

Narcissism is a perfectly accurate word.

[@FirstnameLastname-py3bc]

He's like president of Turkmenistan, 1 to 1 comparison

[@BuxarooBanzai]

Idiots usually lack self awareness.

[@mikehancock6280]

How dare you challenge the great one! His lack of self awareness is his greatest strength.

[@stevesteiner6844]

"He's got the charisma, he's got the look, he's got the action" His opinion about himself.

[@Julius1225]

Steiner....you are just jealous on him...because he is not of your family member :) You see..if his name was a Stain or Weber or something like this then you will loved him forever :))))

[@stevesteiner6844]

@@Julius1225 That's actually very true.

[@Julius1225]

@@stevesteiner6844 Thank you:) Finally someone onest :)

[@johnr5252]

Women desire him, men want to be him. A true legend in his own mind.

[@mattwilkinson5858]

As quoted from Steven

[@chrisfromsouthaus2735]

"I sort of lied" a brief moment of genuine honesty from Steven

[@sulev111]

"You wash dishes fast." And thus Steven Seagal was born. That explains his fighting style.

[@djLagwayEnjoyer]

Of course, why wouldn’t there be a karate master working as a cook at a local restaurant, I thought all cooks were black belts?

[@johnhareiel5118]

Wax on Wax off. Gotta learn to crawl before one walks

[@es68951]

@@johnhareiel5118 Seagal is more like "Gotta learn to sit before one sits"

[@BigbuddhaBuddy]

He’s literally all the mistakes you make when you’re drunk but it’s like he never wakes up and regrets them 😂

[@tomsdottir]

You've clearly never seen the Catherine Tate sketch, "Not Drunk Enough"

[@bodyrumuae2914]

I've never made false claims of my military service when drunk, or sober. My time in service was never that special. A lot of people are awed by what I got to drive and some other menial things (seriously, some people think driving a bus or HEMTT, etc. is pretty cool), but it's not movie worthy. Maybe a few things I did or seen as a quick joke, but not to base one on.

[@BigbuddhaBuddy]

@@bodyrumuae2914 I was also in the military so I feel it brotha

[@JackRed6666]

I wish i would be perma drunk

[@avokado9444]

Lool thats exactly right

[@hamduddinmasrur4614]

When Seagal started to sing, my cat woke up and took a shit right infront of me. He has never done that so far. Brilliant.

[@MrMozzo]

😂

[@respawn3598]

At least your cat lived 😢

[@cyrusblackwood33]

Steven Seagal has got to be the most ridiculous human being on the planet, it's unbelievable that he actually exists. Totally laughable

[@ashishavin8748]

You gonna regret saying this when the zombie ninja aliens attack, he is our only line of defence.

[@chrisbaron1706]

and who the f are you what have you done u aint got shit on him and never will your f laughable he would kick your punk ass on the planet huh u are dumb

[@benstakowitz3034]

He's just like trump but with black paint and dye.

[@YuTuboTuTubas]

Well, a true entertainer.

[@strelok5661]

@@benstakowitz3034 Trump derangement syndrome on effect

[@DerDemokrat86]

A real sportsman, genuine A-List actor, serious politician, charismatic speaker, humble when talking about his success - that's Schwarzenegger. And then there's Seagal.

[@dalehood1846]

SEAGULL

[@benitomaldonado7080]

“Screw your freedom “ - Schwarzenegger 🤨

[@DerDemokrat86]

@@benitomaldonado7080 Yeah, so which of the described attributes is contradicted by that? I've seen the video btw, which puts the sentence into it's context. One can cheaply try to reduce the statement to that sentence, but is a reaction to those who use their freedoms as a shield.

[@shirotonbo6315]

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie 😂

[@crusty21]

Schwarzenegger is a dickhead and commie libral. LA smog rotted out his common sense.

[@thebonerfromhell]

One time when I was walking through a rough area of Japan or America or something, I was attacked by a group of ninjas or yakuza or gangsters or whatever, when suddenly Steven Seagal appeared out of nowhere and spoke to them, real low, in Japanese or native American or something like that and they all bowed and then turned to me and apologised and then left. I turned to thank Steven but he was slowly disappearing into the shadows while awkwardly maintaining eye contact. If you're reading this, thankyou Steven.

[@ezzar8165]

Brilliant!!!! 😂😂😂

[@Adara007]

Rofl!

[@seymourscagnetti1413]

Spot on comment (or something like that). Did anyone ever find out "who killed Bobby Lupo"?

[@Kaido_928]

I believe you, this happened.

[@TheWardagh]

😂😂😂

[@DrRynsta]

I also love how his ego is so big, he never takes a scratch of damage or has to overcome anything remotely resembling an obstacle in all his movies.

[@justinbrown3053]

Not true. He was killed pretty early on in that Kurt Russell movie on the airplane.

[@alanjamesh.zamorano1677]

@@justinbrown3053 Yeah, but the ones that say "written by Steven Seagal" do. So if it's up to him, his character will always be the most powerful one in the movie.

[@gordonggrey6548]

He got hit once when he was looking for Ritchie

[@alexmartin3143]

He got effed up in the one with Kelly Lebrock… Shot to shit and put in a coma… But yes in the last 22 years you’re right..

[@Awesum]

He also only ever uses the same the hand motions, that shit is hilarious to me

[@chefmagneto]

No one loves him more than Steven Seagal

[@Tokolos]

He's just the guy for him.

[@jesseolson3142]

Legend in his own mind

[@jaystreet46]

Sensei Segal is a living meme, and the fact that he doesn’t realize that he makes a fool of himself every time he opens his mouth is hilarious to me

[@bg22757]

This word gets thrown around a lot these days, but he is a true narcissist.

[@solomoon3083]

@@bg22757 there is a reason for that. Because a LARGE percentage of the human population are narcissists. It is a phenomena that should studied more intensely. Must mean something.

[@bg22757]

@@solomoon3083 if you think the majority of people are narcissists you've never met one for real

[@vinewood1554]

@@solomoon3083 I don't think most of people are narcissist, it's normal for a human being to love himself tho but going too far makes him narcissist, also people think that everyone is like them, a thieve doesn't trust others because he thinks people will steal from him, a narcissist thinks that awesomeness is a competition because he thinks everyone is like him

[@The-Host]

And this man was never heard from again. Never bad mouth Steven seagull. Or you'll get got, or something like that.

[@adoredpariah]

Ah man, bringing back some memories of that time that I too was an underage dishwasher when a ninjutsu master approached me and said "I like to way you wash those dishes boy, you have what it takes to become the next ninja master of the world" and so I did.

[@sik59rt]

It must have killed him to flip that table of food

[@enricohocho]

Not if they promised him a 1000 Dollar Happy Meal at Mc Donald´s

[@cameronjones8641]

🤣🤣🤣Bloody hilarious

[@nuttysquirrel8816]

🤣😂😂

[@muthafuckawhatchusay]

Acting!

[@sik59rt]

@@muthafuckawhatchusay i read that in Jon Lovitz' voice

[@jarule275]

Steven is SO fast he thinks in Japanese and translates it into French then into English.

[@persuasivebarrier2419]

This needs to be a tshirt lol

[@Ziggy_Stark.]

Such a refreshingly humble man.

[@Doorsofprcptn]

If we only could have more of these people around. Zen is what he radiates.

[@vorpalblades]

Best dishwasher ever.

[@robpelick7460]

Would that there were many more like him ....the world would be a much better place

[@paul7t5]

Best comment on here hahaha

[@ldarm]

Fucking got me 😂😂😂

[@punkavaug]

If I ever develop a terminal illness, tell the make-a-wish people I wanna fight seagal

[@jesseolson3142]

The best part is he really believes deep down that people take him serious. its amazing I can watch every Seagal interview over and over

[@fallingattic8507]

Been watching heaps...the guys fried, it's hilarious

[@adabsurdum3314]

what a horrible addiction

[@JoeR203]

Kudos to the interviewers who see his BS, but act like they believe everything he tells them. I'd love to see an interviewer do that, and after the interview is over and Seagal walks away, the interviewer looks at the camera and says "What a dick!".

[@jesseolson3142]

@@JoeR203 He actually believes he showed Aderson Silva how to do a front kick. One of the most basic kicks that pretty much anyone can do.

[@JoeR203]

@@jesseolson3142 Yeah but in the shape Seagal is currently in, he probably only kicked an ankle.

[@jodecraecker2669]

The man doesn't do pushups, he just pulls the world towards him.

[@dingdingdingdiiiiing]

I'm fascinated, he is always in character.

[@vborovikov]

he is a method actor

[@RJLbwb]

I am left with the impression that Steven Seagal has been in a perpetual mid life crises since the age fourteen.

[@--pussypatroll--]

Steven Seagal was discovered because of dish-washing skills.

[@sumo-ninja]

Because a martial arts expert was also a dishwasher and noticed how fast he could wash dishes that has to be the greatest origin story ever

[@ninh05]

He was flailing his arms when he washed dishes. That’s when the masters knew, he is special.

[@bruiseleeroy7010]

@@ninh05 Special ed maybe. He literally ripped off Karate Kid

[@emilianosintarias7337]

he moved fast on them, and the karate master who worked there was like damn

[@MetaITurtle]

So is his fighting style dishwasher?

[@markwebster1238]

“All the old masters and senpai introduced me as their senpai” the level of narcissist you have to be to say that sentence with a straight face is astonishing.

[@dknf4036]

its mind blowing, truly

[@puppylove3781]

No no, only the delivery man would call him "master"! Delivery guy: "It's 2am, what do you want?" Steven "Send pie! It's an emergency!" (senpai = send pie! 🤣)

[@nutmeg0144]

@@puppylove3781 😂😂👌

[@useitwice]

Ive been studying this man for 57 years now (Im 34 btw) and Ive come to the conclusion that he is god. Thank you. (Im also a russian mongol.)

[@blackagent4754]

There is only one God, and it can't be Steven. He's mocked by everyone. (I know you're joking, btw)

[@j.muckafignotti4226]

I want to extend my heartfelt admiration to you and your studies on the “Seagul!” Very few people have shown the aptitude for studies of this depth. That being said, you will forever be known as the leading Seagulologist on the planet.

[@SkeletorJenkins]

Are you his father?

[@metalfatigue2100]

I swear when Steven talks, it has about as much depth as a 4 year old explaining which ninja turtle is his favorite. Although I do get a chuckle watching his movies as he waddles around, firing weapons wrong, and bad writing.

[@josef2861]

The guy has a knack for making anything visibly false

[@enricohocho]

Either it´s him or what makes more sense..... All of us.

[@howlinmadmurdock9553]

It's amazing how his "shoe polish" hair piece hasn't changed for many many years 😂

[@irvinmorales1409]

It has. On a movie he was doing, he fell into the water and all his "real hair" started leaking out!

[@andrewpolasek5524]

Kiwi shoe polish, when only the best will do...

[@thegargoylecumeth7932]

"There is no actor I've ever met who has the abilities as an actor and a lover like Steven Seagal has."- Steven Seagal

[@Gerald0613]

he never even said that...

[@thegargoylecumeth7932]

@@Gerald0613 being humor deficient is okay, and nothing to be ashamed of. You're still a person who matters

[@Rockit-]

His lack of self awareness coupled with his insane amount of delusions of grandeur is a quality he has that would be hard for anyone else to come even close to or even replicate.

[@SofaKingQuick]

Trump.

[@Rockit-]

@@SofaKingQuick close

[@konradheumann8342]

I don't know much. But I know that Steven Seagal must have voted for Donald T****. They're cut from the same fake-macho cloth.

[@mikewheeler3994]

@@SofaKingQuick not even close

[@brianwalsh1401]

@@mikewheeler3994 You're right, trump far surpasses Segal's rich fantasy life. I actually think trump should pick Segal as his running mate. That would cap off perfectly the state of the republican party. The only problem would be Segal wouldn't want to be vice president.

[@slicebergtrim737]

This guy is either a comedic genius or he never grew out of the Bruce Lee fantasy phase of childhood 😂😂😂

[@trixylizard6970]

Hey! Bruce Lee was real!

[@spacegoat0133]

Idk something like that

[@robertmaguire1067]

I think the same thing every damn day

[@onyx9857]

He explained string theory to Einstein. He taught Michae Jordan to dunk. He invented Cinnamon Buns. He discovered pheromones. He math’d all the possible maths.

[@FizzleFX]

He divided by zero... Twice. Using the alphabet.

[@poornendusp6192]

He thaught Will Smith to slap

[@049-m7m]

His dad works at Xbox as well

[@THEKING-tt5rp]

please stop your killing me 😂

[@poornendusp6192]

He inspired Chuck Norris to write all the Chuck Norris jokes

[@LeviGC93]

"Many consider me one of the great masters in my own field" is such a nice line.

[@Budukhong]

Amazing isn't it? Like not even THE greatest in his own field, ONE OF the greatest. Implying there's some dude out there who's outstevenseagalling Steven Seagal. The retardedness of this shameful blob never ceases to amaze me.

[@EightOneGulf]

I just might use that one on my next job interview

[@attackpatterndelta8949]

It’s just no one really knows what field that is.

[@miaouew]

yeah, the other cows got nothin on him

[@f_ck_putinswar1014]

Truly a legend in his own lunchtime.

[@felkikid]

Ive known a few compulsive liars in my life and they are all exactly like this. They don't even care if its believable after a while, and they lie when there's no reason to hide the truth. Its truly a compulsion. The best thing you can do is have them guide you on a build your own adventure story.

[@chucknorrisffs]

Sometimes I wonder about my choices in life man. Look at where he is now, him shoveling manure has got him so far lol..

[@el34glo59]

@@chucknorrisffs bingo

[@Pissgremlin5964]

Aaron carter was like that.

[@leebarbs7176]

Thought I was the only person who enjoys rolling with the choose your own adventure story approach when encountering that 😂

[@vatoloco1528]

Steven is still SOOOOOOO fast! So fast you don't even see his fingers move when he's playing guitar!

[@wakazuzu]

So fast you can't see him eating at a buffet. The food just disappears, as if by magic!

[@MutarFuqueer]

He's the wind

[@johnk.7523]

Or doing dishes apparently

[@robpelick7460]

He can literally make a guitar talk, as in: ...."Put me back in my case, please!"

[@Kpink744]

@@MutarFuqueer he looks like he has trapped wind 💨

[@MatoBateman]

I'm a plumber too, and when I fixed that toilet, the family was so satisfied. They literally said they'd never seen plumbing like that. Just fills me with great joy!!

[@j-son221]

It's almost like this guy has tried his hardest to become the opposite of what Keanu Reeves is.

[@vanderlei1765]

Except in acting and movie quality, they both suck at that.

[@theonlyplain]

@@vanderlei1765 Wtf dawg keanu has been in john wick, the matrix, constantine and many other movies that are highly praised upon while steven has like one

[@vanderlei1765]

@@theonlyplain lol "highly praised", although he hasnt dropped as low as Seagel those films can hardly be called the pinnacle of filmmaking and his acting skills are close to none.

[@DankPope]

Steven Seagal needs to be the villain in John Wick 5.

[@corvopsyroach9040]

@@DankPope oh my god i need that!!!

[@kurtroberts2305]

The funniest 🤣 thing about Steven seagal is he truly believes everything he says

[@michaellawlor5625]

Because he is a narcissist.

[@mikewheeler3994]

Or sad

[@desertmulehunter]

He is master sensei

[@niksarass]

Until Jean Claude VD defied him, then he had the only short moment of clarity in his life and apologised and ran away

[@Rig0r_M0rtis]

He's the Donald Trump of Hollywood

[@autopilotlevel7296]

I’ve known many guys like him. The desire to feel like the world only exists for them to have a place to be seen is unbelievable.

[@deltabluesdavidraye]

It is called Antisocial Narcissism.He is actually a very dangerous criminal.

[@not.supermario]

I took martial arts lessons as a kid and one thing I've learned is that it is important to have discipline, fight fair and be a good sportsman. Steven has none of these qualities.

[@stanleywhite4404]

He’s an actor who played a cool guy one time and never wanted to stop

[@Gerald0613]

He actually was a cool guy and a good actor and let's be honest an OUTSTANDING martial artist too. You're probably just jelous. - Steven Seagal

[@LordGadwin]

Steven reminds me of a kid I went to school with, he thought he was the biggest toughest badass in the school yard yet he was never in a fight in his life.

[@JoeMama-yd1ve]

I had a friend growing up who was a pathological liar and he acted like that too, but then when some of my friends got in a big brawl with these other kids, tough guy just watched from the sidelines and a girl who wasn’t there told us later that he said he not only fought but punched one of them so hard that he flew up and out of his shoes.

[@NovaSniper12]

@@JoeMama-yd1ve damn, he sounds like a badass

[@resident_alien595]

Abnormal is probably the best word to describe this man.

[@enricohocho]

Well at least he is memorable... i think there are many ppl that envy him for all of his godgiven talents

[@deusvlad2.083]

@@enricohocho God given talents? name me 1 talent he has hes bad at everything, and when you think hes good at something hes actually a pathalogical liar

[@yewtewbstew547]

He also kinda looks like an abnormal from Attack on Titan.

[@charlesc.fuentes1033]

Is there gonna be a movie named like that starting him in the future?

[@danielmoran9902]

Bell-end is a good one, too.

[@taramathews7391]

When cops, the army, master martial artist, and the CIA need a man on top of his game to give them advice they call this overweight b list actor who is almost 70 years old. Thank you for your service to the world Steven

[@mattberg6816]

B level? You are very generous with that one

[@MinscFromBaldursGate92]

He was considered A-list in the nineties before his ego ruined everything.

[@personalspace6270]

​@@MinscFromBaldursGate92 That went away fast after two good movies.

[@bob23301]

You want to defeat Segal these days just tell him you will fight him at the top of the stairs. Lol

[@Quazi-Moto]

But then you'd have to face his double!

[@NowLedgeOutpost]

@@Quazi-Moto lmao

[@mattberg6816]

Obviously he can levitate

[@grease430]

What if he's fatass takes the elevator?

[@flightofthebumblebee9529]

Didn't you hear him? He gets FASTER with age! He's almost 70 so by the time he is 100 he will be in his prime.

[@GreatContinentofAfrica]

There has never been a more evil looking antagonist, playing heroes in film history

[@ThumbsHunter]

To this day, nobody has seen Richie.

[@hrhbettylivingstoned]

He is on a hill, overlooking a river, with pine cones all around.

[@ivorypoacherplays]

Whoever put this together is a genius

[@jayxtacee5695]

💯% co-sign

[@m-train2334]

Sometimes the comedy writes itself.

[@MaxStArlyn]

Would all this hate towards Steven Segal have anything to do with his great relationship with Rυςςια?., I wonder if this is just part of the hundreds of CIA propaganda programs. “…Operation Earnest Voice is an astroturfing campaign by the federal government of the United States.The main aim of the initiative are to use sockpuppet accounts to spread pro-American propaganda on social networking services based outside of the United States….”

[@melvert33]

The guy bravely grew his hair back, not one man who ever existed has done that...only Steven. Why can't people just let him eat in peace.

[@ThreeBeingOne]

Comment is low key incredible

[@uppercutgrandma4425]

He eats on the toilet

[@FirstnameLastname-py3bc]

Elon Musk is the second person

[@DrMurdercock]

@@uppercutgrandma4425 That's a bit over the line. Have a heart, man!

[@cameronjones8641]

Agreed, I could not explain this post better than N C. Low key incredible! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@BillyMcMorran]

“The fish is an important, sentient, being” - Steven Seagull

[@Rule-of-two]

What a boring place the world would be without this legend. A walking parody. Gotta love him!

[@anomonyous]

Never breaks character.

[@ErlendFlatin]

Steven would be a genius comedy actor, instead he is a sad action actor

[@enricohocho]

Bro you just missed his unfailable strategy of becoming an eternal meme god. Shame on your pathetic short ass vision. btw youre a disgrace to martial arts.

[@c0m4g1bb]

Bad agent or terrible self awareness?

[@ErlendFlatin]

@@c0m4g1bb definitely zero self awareness, he seems incapable of laughing at himself because he is obsessed with appearing like a super badass, but in reality he just comes of as a douche

[@jordansnell6849]

@@c0m4g1bb both

[@Hack3r91]

Seagal is such a character that I can't even tell when he's "acting" and when he's just being himself...

[@fixinggrace]

The man, the myth, the legend in his own mind Steven Seagal.

[@TonyThaTigerr]

@IStevenSeagalyours too. Don’t lie

[@jortiz1451]

“One of the cooks there, his name was Sakamoto Sense.” 😂 That’s like saying I met a cook called John The Teacher. 😂

[@lasskinn474]

Teacher is a legit western surname tho. At this point i question if he can understand japanese tho

[@mrbobert6312]

Unrealistic, Steven would NEVER flip a table full of food like that! He'd eat all that food at lighting speed, but very gracefully, while sitting and kicking everyone in the shins to death!

[@DDFYO]

I can't wait until he's 90 telling us how equipped his wheelchair is

[@weiSane]

Steven seagal probably thinks that him talking slowly with a monotone sounding voice and mumbling his way through the scenes makes him such a cool tough guy 😂

[@King-balloon]

Can’t believe they used Morgan freeman to play God in Bruce almighty, when we had Steven an actual deity and actor, missed opportunity I say

[@whocanitbenow13]

He was too busy arresting criminals in Louisiana while killing ISIS members in Iraq simultaneously training with the ninjas in Japan and giving interviews for TV news networks.

[@King-balloon]

@@whocanitbenow13 what a guy, I’ll let them off then

[@whocanitbenow13]

@@King-balloon I’m amazed that many of us women aren’t lining up to bare his children. I mean, c’mon! Who wouldn’t want some of his seed?! What’s wrong with us?

[@bloodangel19]

@@whocanitbenow13 he is like Zeus.... you must be chosen by him.

[@whocanitbenow13]

@@bloodangel19 Makes perfect sense.

[@JohnnyApp1eseed]

Hes got a serious personality disorder 😅 Gotta love that every one of his movies, no matter the odds, no one can touch him in a fight. He never has to overcome any adversity cuz he’s always in god mode killing everyone lol. And not even a scratch, even though his karate looks like he’s doing shadow puppetry 😂

[@Padopoulosman]

We all laugh at his lack of self awareness, but, I mean, look how far its got him lmao

[@ryanmeredith4620]

Bankruptcy?

[@FatFrogChonk]

SA allegations?

[@FatFrogChonk]

The inability to gain any skill besides clearing an entire buffet of a week's worth of food?

[@umarthdc]

It totally didn't have anything to do with his friends in the mafia

[@gwkiv1458]

How far? The guy has no dignity and sexually assaults people. Yeah, we see how far it got him

[@hoch316]

God bless whoever made this.

[@default5790]

Steven Seagal is the type of guy where he sees something he considers badass and then he applies it to his real life story.

[@Sinclair80]

His music video is EXACTLY what I expected it would look like.

[@AdamOwenBrowning]

9:34 He's even ambidextrous! This man's legendary ability knows no bounds

[@leewright1]

Nobody considers Seagal a master of anything but egotism, SA, bullying and the craft service table.

[@cargo_vroom9729]

I love how in all the fight clips he's literally just murdering people. And also, how his main method of attack seems to be quick editing cuts.

[@enricohocho]

and over the years he probably became even quicker 👁👄👁

[@whatlurks_]

😂😂😂

[@space302]

He was indeed ahead of his time. A very stable genius who rated himself 10/10 before it was cool.

[@juliemount1219]

I see exactly what you see. Presidential levels of talent.

[@SchmuckAmok]

The current dude is literally retarded

[@YuTuboTuTubas]

If Steven Seagal lived in Gotham city, Batman would be fried..😂😂😂

[@setnomA]

He was suppose to play Batman but thank god he didn’t and it ended up being Michael Keaton 😅

[@heels-villeshoerepairs8613]

He is the best singer, actor, martial artist, dancer, shooter, runner, sitter, actor, writer, embassador, CIA, FBI, SHERIFF, SPY, navy seal, boxer, expert at street fighting, karate, kung foo, coach, master. he is an amazing playboy, most attractive stud, he is Russian, Italian Japanese, American, Chinese, Polish, Mexican, he speaks 30 languages. He is humble, vibrant, caring and virtuous. He is a religious icon and a poet. He can use numchuks and knives better than anyone. He is a diver, swimmer, warrior, gymnast, sensai, killer, wrestler chef. He is omni present, a councillor, and pacifist. He can play every instrument, a master at blues, rock n roll and metal, a Zen master, Buddhist, teacher, eater, humorist... have i missed anything?! These are all integral before you can truly be called a great exponent of BULLSHIDO!

[@Sunny_Doom]

Steven seagal really is proof that you can be whatever you want as long as u believe. Lmao

[@robertdesrosiers2382]

He is truly the gift that keeps giving.

[@ezzar8165]

haha

[@attackpatterndelta8949]

He’s the gift that won’t fuck off.

[@TheHippieGunner]

I heard you studied nuclear physics? Steven: …and bio chemistry but I’m not at liberty to talk about that.

[@JamesGhodbane]

With Steven Seagal a serious situation is a hilarious situation.

[@onyx9857]

He uses Aikido to move out of the path of any acting coaches or nutritionists.

[@sleepydragonzarinthal3533]

I love the old demos he claims are real, where you can clearly see the hesitation between his "throws" and their jumps. There are different degrees of assistance a demo partner will use to finish out the moves, much of which is for their own safety, but in every Seagal demo I've ever seen, the people being thrown are doing 99% of the work while Stevo just flips his hands around a little. The delay is caused by the partner not following the move correctly, where if Stevo were actually doing it right, could cause injury, but he is barely doing anything and the partners are just jumping summersaults. It's not any kind of realistic if you've ever participated in a demo, it looks more like practice or like Stevo can't stick to the right way the demo was practiced, and the partners have to make it up as they go, causing hesitations and falls that don't fit the moves because they were meant for a different move. Basically, Seagal is a fraud, and it's unbelievable anyone taught him anything given his personality, attitude, and clear lack of discipline and willingness to practice.

[@patrickpaez]

Usually as you get older you tend to calm down and reflect on past decisions. You try and learn from your mistakes. This dude appears to have done the opposite. It’s a shame because he was one of my favorites back in the day.

[@jarrodhall3686]

So long as you’ve learned from your mistake.

[@h2w25]

Best response ever^^^

[@koningklootzak7788]

When was he ever your favorite?

[@patrickpaez]

@@koningklootzak7788 i always loved his fight style from his Under Siege and Above the Law days. He had a brutal yet simple look. I never saw it again until Donnie Yen’s Ip Man came about. I am aware Steven was very hard on costars and stunt men too. Around the Fire Down Below time frame he got a bit too preachy for my taste. He got over weight and generally imaged himself out of the roles he looked best in. I really wish he had cleaned up his act for the Expendables movies.

[@koningklootzak7788]

@@patrickpaez that's embarrassing. Don't tell people around you about it.

[@Its_Papa_John]

I think "Abnormal" is a perfect word choice for describing a majority of Steven Seagal's actions.

[@ronenTheBarbarian]

He's the Steven Segal of Martial Arts, a master in his own field.

[@gasalpha879]

Science still tries to find out what that field is

[@salvadorjimenez2872]

This guy knows Aikido, Karate, Jujitsu & many other deadly words. He's also a specialist in Kung-Food.

[@Jonathan_Strange]

....and a super fast dish washer. (apparently)

[@chrisredfield6274]

I love how the takeaway of Brandon Lee's death is that they called Steven and said "You're amazing"

[@OttoTheWeim]

And the extra hole leaking blood that wasn’t there prior to gun being fired wasn’t a clue that there was “a projectile” that caused it. Thankfully CSI Seagull was on hand to help solve that brain buster.

[@justVengeance]

"Steven Seagal is the best compared to all action stars from the 70s, 80s, 90s, 2000s until now. He is actually the legend among all legends" - Steven Seagal, 85 years ago

[@doublep1980]

Man, I would pay good money to watch Sensei Seagull trying to take on Michael Jai White or JCVD. Maybe he could use that super secret kick, that he tought Anderson Silva on them. Btw. In the same interview he trashtalks on Chuck Norris. Here's the deal, Chuck Norris all memes aside, was an actual Military Police officer in the US Air Force and served as security for an Air Force base in S.Korea, during the late 1950's. He didn't pretent to be a cop, with a camera team following around.

[@tonyjones1560]

So would I. I think it’d be a *VERY* short video in either case.💸💸💸💸but worth the laughs 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@maaagicman]

With every movie he makes, his gut gets bigger and his audience gets smaller

[@armandblake]

Let’s all be grateful there’s Steven out there checking on how the world is going

[@YiaMdj]

I'm so happy this guy exist. He has no right being this famous but he is and it's beautiful

[@colbolt54]

He's a total jerk and a fake! Married 3 times to 3 different women at the same time bigamist SOB. Had kids with all 3. Scared of juan claud van dam

[@YiaMdj]

@@colbolt54 I agree that he is a dick but I am polygamous and I resent that argument

[@benitomaldonado7080]

I wonder sometimes if he’s trolling us 😂

[@devinallen4708]

Oh... he's not trust me

[@phillbarnes8513]

Yep, I was wondering the same thing. Like he’s doing some Sasha Baron Cohen ‘Borat’ thing… except he’s been doing it for 30 plus years now.

[@TheReelDealFilmReviews]

“He is severely hurt, maybe dead” 🤣

[@Austin-nx9vd]

His lack of self awareness is astounding.

[@robpelick7460]

Some day....somehow....Steven Seagal will astonish everyone and act like a normal human being

[@FatFrogChonk]

He is starring in an unending loop of his perceived past glories. We will never get to see him outside of that.

[@Chafflives]

'Normal' would be boring. Characters like him are needed to bring a smile to people.

[@MidTierVillain]

He’s so ridiculous, and absolutely absurd, that he’s entertaining.. they could just follow him around with a camera, and I’d watch it. *The Sensational Life Of Sensei Seagal*

[@chesterfieldthe3rd929]

Now that would be low level content 😉

[@GhostSal]

I can’t imagine his response to someone saying, “you’re amazing”, is “why”? Much more like, someone says “you’re amazing”, Seagal’s actually response “I Know”.

[@enricohocho]

not even close "hey steven youre amazing" "Steven: i was raised in a nuclear warzone while we were fighting the radioactive rats as infants, our parents taught us the way of the shaolin...(something in shitty japanese) and thats why you will turn around and go home now

[@dustondoesit3913]

10:45 this aged so poorly. Bones is literally the fighter Segal thinks he is.