Nicks Friends Script

[@mrfeeny349]

the spec script is so far removed from anything on friends yet somehow completely captures the spirit of every friends storyline. incredible

[@thomas6600]

singlehandedly the best episode ever not made

[@coreygolphenee9633]

That is Nick's gift, he can perfectly capture the rhythm of whatever he's making fun of while also being completely in left field

[@elijahfordsidioticvarietys8770]

This is the episode the writers wanted to make but weren’t allowed to.

[@ProudFilthyCasual]

@@coreygolphenee9633 Nick is the Ween of comedians.

[@adriaticvenetians]

@@ProudFilthyCasual absolutely

[@nairbas392]

So no one told you life was going be this gay.

[@PeterBondeVillain]

Hell yeah dude

[@inktoxicant]

(instead of the claps) GaySexGaySex

[@caseytatum5837]

@@inktoxicant nah its clapping its just asscheeks

[@berbobloo]

👏👏👏👏

[@AVerySillySausage]

I feel like there was an unsaid bit, it was so obvious that he didn't do it on purpose.

[@philsmith4333]

have listened to this bit so many times and I think Nick genuinely thought that doctors bleached assholes and he just played it cool when Stav pointed out how ridiculous that premise is

[@Avengerie]

I like how Ross thinking the doctor is a woman is the reverse of Carmella thinking Tony's psychiatrist was a man.

[@fct4life]

very allegorical

[@miseryisme]

But she wasnt getting off to the thought of said male doctor

[@Vesterpester]

Again, it’s like poetry - they rhyme

[@dogdog6815]

Curb but it's the curb from American History X

[@jimmyrustler8983]

And Michael Richards plays Edward Nortons role.

[@AM-xh9iq]

Curb Your N-thusiasm

[@josephlinden1630]

Curb your blackmouthism

[@caderlocke8869]

They came up with what would have been the funniest episode of friends ever on the spot,

[@nuancecontraire]

I always felt Friends was the type of show that almost writes itself

[@sarahhughes4437]

Its a low bar

[@drrockkso8882]

Nick comes up with fucking hilarious script ideas for all kinds of movies/shows on the fly. I wish we lived in a universe where these actually turned into real films and episodes.

[@iwazhear77]

"they" literally just nick

[@Slopdoggy]

I love laughing with my best friends Nate, Steve, and Alan. It makes me feel more secure as a gay man.

[@ezmurdelore1777]

As a homophobic man this makes me uncomfortable.

[@nuancecontraire]

@@ezmurdelore1777 as a homophobe-phobe it makes me uncomfortable that you are uncomfortable

[@ezmurdelore1777]

@@nuancecontraire as a homophobic gay black conservative, I’m very uncomfortable right now.

[@nuancecontraire]

@@ezmurdelore1777 ok I guess you win This time

[@nuancecontraire]

@@ezmurdelore1777 i have returned as a transphobic nonbinary demisexual furry anarcho-communist to defeat you

[@VideoGamesIncorporated]

The boys actually made a parody song without any sexual references in the beginning.

[@mattyb8752]

No they just sang the actual theme song lol

[@Deffected]

The homosexuality is implied just by the regular song/TV show. That's the genius of the bit.

[@andrewfinch76]

I'm really impressed and disappointed that they didn't go for the low hanging fruit "So no one told you life was gonna be that gay"

[@chickensalad7199]

​@@andrewfinch76yeah. That really fucked with my GOCD. I was hoping and waiting, and it never dropped.

[@SoulshineWavy]

Susan is the masculine women who steals Ross’ lesbian wife

[@helpIthinkmylegsaregone]

I thought that was Adam

[@xjamesxreedx]

He said masculine

[@ldmt1995]

Damn Nick just made a mid summers dream mad lib totally improvised his writing abilities are uncanny.

[@shone4947]

Gay friends, followed by Gay Seinfeld, and then Regular Frazier

[@alistairwhite4768]

this line still gets me months after hearing this bit for the first time

[@penguano5514]

Whenever someone calls straight Frazier on his show about their problems he just calls them gay and hangs up on them

[@ZeranZeran]

2:33 "Oh, you wanna go back to this? And then their friend TJ Maxx is all like "WHAAAAT?" That actually made me laugh hard. So stupid.

[@rileymcdonough7976]

Nick mullen is a national hero. He should be on the $100 bill

[@ZeranZeran]

I'd rather vote for that, than Joe Biden

[@ChristopherFodor]

​@@ZeranZeranvoting is gay

[@ZeranZeran]

@@ChristopherFodor hell yeah dude

[@alexdavis7090]

Next to his portrait it would say “ *Actual size “

[@Tunkkis]

​@@ChristopherFodor I mean, you could always just write "Donald Duck" or "Ted Kaczynski" or whatever on the ballot.

[@elijahfordsidioticvarietys8770]

There actually was a Friends episode where Joey and Chandler found a “free porn channel” and kept it constantly on for the entire episode to ensure they didn’t lose it. I’m not joking. That was a real episode. It was called “The One With The Free Porn”. Oh, and they presumably STILL have the free porn for the rest of the show given the episode’s ending.

[@chickensalad7199]

That's awesome.

[@drrockkso8882]

I remember that episode and thinking that their logic of not changing the porn channel because if they did they'd lose the free porn made no sense. That's not how cable TV worked in the 90s. If you were receiving a channel you didn't pay for it was either because of a system error on the cable company's end or because you had an illegally modded cable box that unscrambled the channel. Either way, the feed was always being piped into your TV. Changing the channel wouldn't affect anything.

[@Friarbuck619]

​@@drrockkso8882you're right that is a better premise for an episode of a sitcom

[@notkyle9204]

Nicks spec test for friends is the best thing ever

[@Randomname8383]

Very disappointed Nick missed the obvious “life was gonna be this gayyyyyy”

[@chrisallen9743]

Lol i know i sung along and said gay thinking he was about to say it too...but he didnt. Also missed ''always feels like your so fucking gueer...''

[@susrev88]

@@chrisallen9743 i think he did say that on a different podcast.

[@dustinanderson1862]

No one told you STAV was gonna be this GAYYYYYYYY

[@coheteos]

"Your fucking wife just left and took the kids awaaaaaaaaaay"

[@quantrellbishop9263]

It was too easy so he didnt do it

[@nuancecontraire]

Stav's cackling brings THE PEOPLE great joy

[@knightscroftsquire-muldoon]

It makes me slap my knee 3 times.

[@cat_city2009]

Hell yeah dude Best laugh track on a podcast.

[@teoteo3522]

He will be missed :(

[@nuancecontraire]

@@teoteo3522 wym he'll be missed

[@teoteo3522]

@@nuancecontraire he is not on the podcast any more

[@leopardii6565]

A conversation about friends with my gay friends Nick, Stav and Adam

[@stonewithagun6045]

Can you please spent less time with my friends im there best friend and not you. Im also the gay lover of adam

[@n-wordheelflips2648]

you guys are sad.. can't wait to gossip about these comments later with my boyfriend Adam & our gay best friends, Nick & Stavros.

[@icey984]

I’m gay.

[@dongiano]

I told you I'm gay and you guys still left me out of this one

[@Deadman1000]

I've never seen a single episode of friends until last year. Glad I missed out on it

[@Whocareslol]

watching some of these vids now feels like watching it after 1 of them died

[@roryslaine7896]

Stav actually has a beautiful singing voice. Wow. I'm also gay.

[@anduin1]

I watched part of that reunion episode they just did and most of them look like they’ve been hitting the plastic surgeon heavily. Ross might be trying to turn into a woman now

[@Trenz0]

"Dr. Beverley... Something." Fuckin' nerd almost said Crusher

[@BIacklce]

hes only seen 2-3 episodes guys

[@Shrubchucker]

SO NO ONE TOLD YOU LIFE WAS GONNA BE THIS WAAAAAAY *gunshot *gunshot *gunshot *gunshot You're hooked on smack and crack Welfares late todaaaaaaaay The car you stole is stuck in second geeeeeaaaar and your baby daddy don't get out of jail for another 5 yeeeaaars

[@coheteos]

Nice

[@grandmaskisses4321]

Rip matthew perry

[@profoundbathroomgraffiti]

doin' k in h, rip

[@SimonStrange]

No Play Joke :(

[@2framer]

That TJ Maxx line from Adam might have been the funniest thing he’s ever thought of. By the way I’m gay

[@drugsmadilla]

As a deeply closeted homosexual, this comment makes me uncomfortable

[@madeconomist458]

4:15 has Nick finally accepted the greatness of The Wire?

[@roryoc18]

Calling the wire bad is just the final phase of loving it

[@Vegitaled]

I’m glad you don’t try to sell us some shitty silver bars like another channel I know

[@DonnySimpanero]

Ross where you can crossdress for less.

[@n-wordheelflips2648]

damn you must've created this account right at the end of HH lol

[@agitationfree5980]

The 3rd bit is one of mulldogs best bits

[@nsaxman91082]

Friends is mostly funny in a "Remember what Xers in the 90s thought problems were?" Kinda way

[@nuancecontraire]

Legit 😂 like all having a grand old time and worried about petty drama...like just smash already dude get it over with get her pregnant cause you obviously want both want to and shut the fuck up 😭

[@nathanikeda9723]

I don’t see how life is any different

[@elijahfordsidioticvarietys8770]

People probably had more serious problems in the ‘90s too. They just kept shows like that light because they didn’t want them to be depressing. The whole idea of it was to be kind of escapist.

[@nsaxman91082]

@@elijahfordsidioticvarietys8770 Matthew Perry clearly did. I don't mean that to shit on him, I think he's funny and I hope he's alright

[@elijahfordsidioticvarietys8770]

@@nsaxman91082 oh yeah, he was like, addicted to drugs at the time.

[@joeedwards3586]

I can't believe nick missed the opportunity to sing 'life will be this gay'

[@brunomoutinho962]

i shed tears laughing at leather gay ross, i love this show

[@truegreenbeard7874]

For once Cumtown lives up to its name.

[@IAmRileyMan326]

This bit is Nick’s equivalent of Michael Jordan winning Game 5 of the 1997 NBA finals against the Utah Jazz with the stomach flu

[@HarrisonHollers]

10:14 This is absolutely hilarious and incredibly stupid! “LIGHT!”

[@Shotty262]

The Tobias funke paradox: wearing something for some reason and getting roped into shenanigans that involve bdsm.

[@drrockkso8882]

"Gothic Asshole?"

[@Deucze]

I respect a comedian that honest enough to say that Seinfeld sucks balls.

[@Dan_Ben_Michael]

🎶So no one told life was gonna be this gay… 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🎶 Gay Joey sees a well hung guy at a urinal…. “😱 So, how *you* doin’?”

[@telophasemusic]

There's a podcast here on KZbin called Legends of The Internet; that's like a polar opposite of this show. Absolute black hole of comedy and charisma. The main host is a genuine autistic man who's a die hard sonic fan. Like chris chan, but if he was a bit less disabled

[@telophasemusic]

@@aidancalfee2634 oh totally. Their show is awful. They read off encyclopedia dramatica for sources

[@LiquidVegeta]

Is it Joe Dini?

[@knightscroftsquire-muldoon]

That's what's up.

[@CO1GEE]

it’s not any worse than whatever bullshit this is…and i say that as a fan. It’s all subjective to be fair …

[@themostdiabolicalhater5986]

>genuine autistic >die hard sonic fan “They’re the same picture”

[@toeknee7324]

No one told you life was gonna be this gay

[@noway4879]

Dude, I always thought D.O.A. stood for dead or alive. lol, mind blown.

[@knightscroftsquire-muldoon]

So did I.

[@dr.2335]

I always thought it stood for Dicks, Oral, Anal. But then I am gay.

[@videogamenostalgia]

My mind was blown when I first learned it stands for Dick On Ass

[@salutations8705]

That seinfeld impression🤣🤣🤣

[@jonw3462]

🎶So no one told you blowing guys would be this gay 🎶 AKAKAKAK! 🤮

[@zamnodorszk7898]

… … … .. … …. … … … … … .., … … … … … … and they were ROOMMATES

[@AMMAZZARE]

Remember store that is currently in every shopping center?

[@trevordrexler5652]

The fuckin Chandler and Joey show hahaha oh shit

[@jonvia]

The theme song for Friends is about being gay probably.

[@wowweenamkk33]

How about black Friends and its called Ni-

[@dogdog6815]

Donald Glover will make that show within 5 years to further assert that he is black

[@huytl4136]

Nooo nooo nooo

[@lancecameron183]

There's already a black "Friends." It's called "Living Single."

[@antrod7151]

@@lancecameron183 and it’s much better

[@zg9445]

Yeah Seinfeld would have been much better if Jerry hadn’t been involved

[@momatotsosrorudodi]

So no one told you life was going to be this gay.

[@JohnnysChingaderas]

Omg I can’t fucken take it no more lolollllll my wife came into my office frighten because I was laughing so fucken hard I was crying and in pain because my stomach was hurting so much holy shit lloollllllll

[@drugsmadilla]

Sounds gay

[@kylelumpkin7517]

You don’t have a wife but message received.

[@JohnnysChingaderas]

@@drugsmadilla because i am gay

[@JohnnysChingaderas]

@@kylelumpkin7517 my wife is my left hand

[@Rikodesinko]

I'm really disappointed. When Nick sang the theme song, I was certain he was going to say, "No one ever told you life was going to be this gay".

[@Radiohomunculus]

Me too 😔

[@ATBatmanMALS31]

Everyone did :^(

[@MegaMan-bs3oy]

Jerry had the Best supporting cast ever. They where anyone at else shows canned after season 1

[@GeraldGruenigMedia1]

Noone told you stav was gonna be this gay

[@ericclaptonsrobotpilot7276]

My weekly gay friend(s) simulator

[@pseudovibes98]

So none one told you life was gonna be this "GAY" CLAPAPAP

[@madeconomist458]

I'm gay

[@n-wordheelflips2648]

everyone watches Seinfeld in spite of Jerry

[@ColonelMetus]

I have an idea for a show, Gay Friends

[@TheDutch231]

Bleachologist

[@Blake_.Dryden]

I hate Friends and friends, but I really like arroz con pollo which just means rice with chicken but it does have melted white American cheese on it, very Mexican indeed. Huitzilopochtli bless you Don Jesus.

[@Evs78101]

RIP Matthew Perry

[@billytitus1519]

“🎵No one told you life was going to be this gay🎶”

[@crass340]

Which show is "Homicide"?

[@NickatNite511]

Match-sturbating recliners

[@bryanmccarthy2464]

Who’s the guy on the far right in the thumbnail

[@StevenSeagull]

Brandon Wardell

[@squigpeels.1021]

I'll be gay for yoooou! 'cause you're gay for me too!

[@DonnySimpanero]

Jennifer Hamfisting

[@Gerald5000]

Isn't there an episode where Nick reads a Friends script he wrote?

[@roronoadzoro9429]

He does read a script he wrote but I dont think its friends it could be I cant remember 😂

[@TheBaioken]

It was friends

[@seanconcannon5436]

Is the guy on the right from I Think You Should Leave or am I gay?

[@jakecravens8833]

Brandon Wardell I think.

[@Kyryyn_Lyyh]

The correct version is: “So no one told you life was; Gonna give you AIIIIIDS” You can’t use something that fits too well, ruins the joke.

[@Doooooooooooood]

I share a name with a character from Friends, i like to pretend my FRIENDS here are talking about me.

[@ZanderPingu]

So no one told you life was gonna be this Gay. Clap Clap Clap Clap

[@Chewsywoozy]

I'm straight. No, wait, I'm actually gay.

[@FuzzyDancingBear]

I actually love sitting around, watching Baywatch and getting high all day. Does that make me......... gay?

[@Erisblackstone]

“Oh yeah I forget how that works” Nick Mullen is definitely gay he forgets you can date women

[@KeatonMcAdams]

Nick, Stav, and Aaron. And they’re all gay!

[@jakecravens8833]

Aaron?

[@aaronjewish3258]

@@jakecravens8833 yh

[@jakecravens8833]

@@aaronjewish3258 thank God you're here Aaron. I've been waiting all this time. There is important work to be done.

[@Bobbleheads56]

The friends spec script is so funny but its also schizophrenic and no one but under-25 yr old jaded male nerds will find it humorous

[@oofowie8882]

Hey I’m a 29 year old jaded male nerd and I loved it

[@nathanieledwards3302]

I'm 38 and I've listened to this over 5 times since the pandemic started. I'm also not gay. Straight as hell dude

[@namedidii]

The What's her number bit is all time my girlfriend loves it

[@telophasemusic]

Checkmate nerd, I'm 26

[@TheBaioken]

Over 30year old love it

[@loganrocksmith362]

Member that old number?

[@asdfasfasdfful]

This ruined my Ska cover band

[@kevinstarmack7103]

Friends, which Steven Seagull has none of

[@bluechalk6275]

If I was the showrunner on Friends I'd fire the female cast members and call it Boyfriends

[@Jchasser]

martin skrelli is actually dope he got some of Hillary dna

[@johncamarillo8320]

I always compared Senfield with always sunny in philadelphia, but then i never seen Curb.

[@StevenSeagull]

Curb is really funny. I would highly recommend it

[@petecarter5170]

@@StevenSeagull for a season or two.

[@Cinerary]

They’re all the same shows. All tv is based on itself

[@jap7384]

acting like they don't know the words, cha cha cha cha

[@normstoner5603]

Hell yea dude. Im gas as fuck

[@nonamesinenomine]

snl is gonna steal this one too

[@nonamesinenomine]

Never said they stole the good ones

[@detectivemikehunt]

Leather daddy bit

[@GriffinDuyThespian]

3:43 couldn't be any more correct boiuz

[@timkopf5400]

You Eva finga ya cheeks?

[@christopherknowles]

Fuck yeah FTL

[@wordup7844]

This is so cute 🥰

[@jiggy57]

FTL rules

[@chilltown11]

When I was 12 years old I got pulled into a mall bathroom it was a very gay year

[@Some_Beach]

Frie *n* ds

[@DoctorCyan]

Friends with Benefits (gay).

[@cinemacynic980]

No sound?

[@Hazzard2885]

FTL still rules ass

[@StevenSeagull]

You know it!

[@Ribbet_brown]

Has anyone ever commented about how much Adam sucks at conversations in general?