Surprising NYC Locals by Speaking Perfect Corporate Jargon

I’ve studied some of the most complex languages in the world but this week I took on my biggest challenge yet: learning to speak fluent corporate jargon. Yes, the comments are always telling me to get a real job so I set up a job interview with my friend who works in the corporate world and then spent weeks browsing LinkedIn to master the business lingo necessary to pass the interview, but of course first I had to practice by surprising locals in the ancestral homeland of this unusual dialect, midtown Manhattan.
This was a collab with the very funny Mikey Greenblatt, check out his IG here: / jewishvibes
And check out the bespoke tailoring at Michael Andrews Bespoke, amazing custom tailor: www.michaelandrews.com/
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[@DoJoStan]

The tailor was spot on with his responses 😂. Xiao Ma: "I'm not sure it's moving the needle for me" Tailor: "Despite the single needle stitching?" 😂😂😂

[@CanthusOfCandE]

I think he cut it there as the response caught him offguard and started laughing

[@HCHSKaraoke]

​@@CanthusOfCandEat 0:48 you can see him juuuust crack a smile before he cuts away

[@syproductions456]

Came here to say this!

[@SocajowaRS]

I died

[@jamsolid]

That one broke the mold.

[@cb9600]

I just wanted to touch base and tell you this is a win-win video. You definitely were thinking outside the box. At the end of the day, you really hit it out of the park. Keep me in the loop if you have any similar videos. I'm glad we're on the same page.

[@aloknathsingh4647]

brilliant comment

[@fll0w]

game changer

[@sheevpalps3846]

Well, I think we should circle back to it sooner rather than later. Keep in touch.

[@lutherevans968]

After touching base, he hit the ground running and used outside the box thinking to hit the nail on the head and hit it out of the park. A game changer, indeed!

[@catedoge3206]

Lmao

[@JamesRoth]

You didn't say "thanks in advance." That's the corporate way of ordering someone around while pretending to have gratitude.

[@UnknownEntity420]

Damn, I gotta stop saying "TIA" when asking questions on the internet then

[@themariokartlick]

@@UnknownEntity420nah on the internet it’s different than when your boss says that shit

[@redcatofdeath]

Nothing wrong with a boss saying that, though. They are in charge. I'm more annoyed if a superior tries to pretend like we are collaborating as equals. Just tell me what to do, that's your role.

[@JamesRoth]

@@redcatofdeathAgree, but passive aggressive language can build contempt while adding nothing.

[@redcatofdeath]

I don't think that's passive aggressive. It's passive aggressive, maybe, if someone who is at the same level as you says it. Your boss can say that since they are in position to assume you will be doing it.@@JamesRoth

[@petesvoice1313]

The tailor is a good listener. He used the words of his customer back to him. This creates a feeling of being understood and makes the sale easy.

[@recursion.]

not really.

[@frostech3149]

​@@recursion.elaborate?

[@fernandofigueirinhas7110]

yeah@@recursion.

[@stevemuzak8526]

@@recursion. it is very effective technique. Listening to your clients is important.

[@user-pq2mu5xc2x]

@@recursion. hes a straight joker

[@jesseg1217]

Just to piggy back off of Xiaoma, I'd like to circle back and say this really was a game changer, he hit the nail on the head

[@katl1489]

I'd like to circle back to the part where you said circle back and could I get these minuets from our last meeting so I can circle back just once more before piggy-backing home? Game changer.

[@CornyBum]

the ol' piggy back/circle back combo...a real level 90 serf maneuver, also hard on the back

[@neptunemike]

Do you think he definitely SHOCKED that local?

[@JericBrual]

Xiaoma, you’re two months early for April Fools 😆

[@Nekoala]

I don't see any joke here.

[@jaccrazy21]

😂 Missed the boat on the opportunity I did. 💀 😂

[@PowerNGlory]

@@Nekoala Lighten up Karen.

[@gamophyte]

@@PowerNGlory whooosh.

[@JSLing-vv5go]

My thoughts exactly...

[@kevinjones5560]

Hilarious parody…… My wife was a corporate attorney for 34 years and the things she would say I just had to shake my head.

[@topdog5252]

Legalese is a whole family of languages!

[@syriusgreen6335]

@@topdog5252 explain

[@svartiske3283]

@@syriusgreen6335 well, the first thing is

[@whatsomeonesaidwastaken9216]

can someone touch base and pay it forward to synergize and get me on the same page here with what type of things she would say please keep in touch I need these delivered by q4

[@KS.Caffeine]

Please create a video so we can enjoy the humor as well.

[@Hexalyse]

Lmao the confidence with which you delivered those lines to the tailor was hilarious. His answers were spot on too, this guy has some serious wit!

[@Piemur1]

No, that's only because he was fluent in Corporate Jargon as well.

[@theseangle]

​@@Piemur1he's a native speaker, why are y'all surprised xD?

[@Piemur1]

@@theseangle Wasn't surprised, I was just saying the tailor was fluent in the language too.

[@strophariacaerulea]

You are really showing some cutting-edge creativity, setting a new benchmark that I believe will resonate with audiences globally! Best-in-class content, Kudos!

[@organist1982]

😅

[@PersianPlatypus]

Wow you speak so fluently!! Is your wife corporate?

[@MxJJM]

It’s crazy that this is exactly what Zuckerberg sounds like every time he speaks or posts

[@BUTTERVISION]

@@MxJJMhow did you even think of that 🤣 so true

[@anemicsilence]

😂😂😂👍

[@Psrj-ad]

"SHOCKING Wallstreet locals using PERFECT Corporate Jargon"

[@lizradzick5342]

To be fully transparent, there is significant alignment between your suiting goals and your wardrobing consultant's recommendation. You could optimize your wardrobing situation if you leveraged the value of bespoke clothing to accommodate future expansion targets. At the end of the day, it's your call.

[@JK360noscope]

The opportunity exceeds the current market cap, it's an ABSOLUTE BANGER

[@JoeBauers]

This week I’m teaching how to avoid jargon and cliches in my business writing class-definitely showing students this video. Nice job!

[@fluffyrolls]

I'm curious, why avoid jargon? Isn't writing with familiar words the easiest way to be understood?

[@jasonowens7829]

@@fluffyrollsYou may want to review the definition of jargon.

[@JoeBauers]

@@jasonowens7829 Generally, you should avoid or limit using jargon. If you review the definition, you’ll find it has a negative connotation. However, in some cases it’s unavoidable as the terms and phrases are commonly used in the industry. So it depends on your audience and purpose. Yes, you should know the industry-specific jargon, but also avoid its excessive use. Cheers.

[@JoeBauers]

@@fluffyrolls It’s a good question, so here goes: Generally, you should avoid or limit using jargon. If you review the definition, you’ll find it has a negative connotation. However, in some cases it’s unavoidable as the terms and phrases are commonly used in the industry. So it depends on your audience and purpose. Yes, you should know the industry-specific jargon, but avoid its excessive use. That’s my two cents…Cheers.

[@fluffyrolls]

​@@JoeBauers We have a different meaning of 'avoid'. To me 'avoid' means don't use at all cost. But for you 'avoid' means don't overuse. Funnily enough, this is why people use jargon in the first place. So we don't have to clarify/ add context to our statements all the time. The negative connotations are because jargon creates in and out groups, but business writing is only communicating with fellow in-groupers so I don't think it applies. Another reason for the negative connotation is because it too repetitive compared to other forms of English writing where we are taught to use synonyms and creativity. But using new words increases the possibility of more confusion, like we just had with 'avoid'. As always, everything in moderation. I wouldn't advocate to never use it in business writing but I also wouldn't say its good to overuse it, and I think you agree. Anyway, these word meaning disagreements are what keep the lawyers employed.

[@amado1swgi]

Dear Xiaoma, Please accept my highest commendation for your evident fluency optimization in the corporate lexicon - undertaken through rigorous immersive analysis across monetization models. Whether strategically procuring bespoke tailored apparel, assessing asset allocation amidst light roast brews, maximizing citrus ROI, or aligning competencies during recruitment screens - your utilization of results-driven vocabulary proves mission-critical, moving needles that drive shareholder value. This viral traction and semantic influence warrant additional visibility to harness such solution-oriented dynamism. Expect further leadership responsibilities to fuel the type of laser-focused, Tier One synergy legitimate enterprises take pride in. Heartiest congratulations on your traction - I trust you’ll continue to leverage this momentum. Onwards and upwards, GV

[@namasteavl]

HA! Love this!

[@tobyfitzpatrick3914]

I used Google Translate for this

[@JinglesRasco]

This comment deserves way more love than it currently has.

[@haulwen0564]

Great comment! A masterclass of bs language 😂

[@cynnajackson4556]

This is perfection.

[@samanthagasmire9508]

I know it’s low hanging fruit but I’ll just take the orange juice 😂 best line, gotta love such dry humor

[@famfeld]

I was a teacher for 14 years and we had "eduspeak". Definitely another language as well. Love this humor!

[@Primaltreeman]

studying teaching rn and the jargon has me going wtf

[@JRyan-lu5im]

After being through a gauntlet of AP classes and debate courses, the academic speak was strong, and ever more apparent in Marine Corps Boot Camp lol.

[@oleg_kagan]

*Frowns in Freire*

[@SyenPie]

Can you give an example of this "eduspeak"?

[@famfeld]

For one the massachusetts learning standards are called "frameworks". Then lots of acronyms MCAS, ELL, ESL, SPED Liason, Parenets are called guardians which actually makes sense. The word cognizant is used a lot and never should be anywhere. Also "proactive". That's a big one.

[@abenson1985]

Props to you man, only a brave soul would willingly learn this language....I cringed, so you were spot on with the vocabulary, pronunciation, and delivery 😂

[@zb2363]

I feel nauseous. I fled the corporate world decades ago and now it’s all flashing before my eyes!

[@professional.commentator]

Wait so this jargon has been a thing for decades?

[@tstcikhthys]

You probably mean _nauseated,_ unless you really meant to say that you're spreading nausea.

[@kenshii7404]

@@tstcikhthys no, the above is standard for American English.

[@tstcikhthys]

@@kenshii7404 No, it's just wrong. It parallels the distinction between _infectious_ and _infected,_ which obviously mean two different things, _nauseous_ and _nauseated_ mean two different things.

[@elteescat]

"If you're GROWING!" 😂

[@MrUnidyne]

Merciful God, it *IS* another language!!!

[@rockyember]

1:57 “i think you’re a game changer, you’d be a great game changer, and you’d really be a game changer 😃”

[@swackhammer2139]

I'm really impressed how you nailed the logistics and, wouldn't be shocked if they wanted to take about compensation off line.

[@argonwheatbelly637]

Wow! 😂 You definitely minimized the negative impact of anxiety-driven interpersonal interactions. That's a win in the plus-delta column. 🎉

[@mailbox4820]

🤣 About right! Though I did not hear "Level-set," "Bandwidth," or "On my plate."

[@RespectLoveUnityPeace]

Whoever the suit salesman is, give him a raise. Bravo 👏🏻

[@gail3762]

You really went on a personal journey with this one. You put yourself t out there with you go getter energy. Blue sky thinking, happy to wear the correct hat for the occasion. Keep bringing it to the table. 🥴🥴🥴

[@LordCunningRoan]

As a native speaker, very impressed by how far you've come. Keep up the great work

[@D4RKBRU73]

OMG the tailor is hilarios and so quick-witted, what an icon 🤣 Also he looks a bit like Ethan Hawke, he should definitely consider an acting or comedy career ;)

[@noahc1789]

Best video so far. I can't believe you spent the time to master this. I applaud you, my good sir. The work it must have taken to do this is insane. Thank you.

[@dr.woozie7500]

Outstanding work Xiaoma! Truly inspiring for aspiring communicators seeking to leverage linguistic prowess for impactful engagement and fostering meaningful connections in any setting. Kudos to Xiaoma for this enlightening demonstration of linguistic finesse!

[@amyj.s.9610]

LOL I just quit 28 yrs of corporate life, this is hilarious and giving me PTSD! So on point, it’s scary! Don’t forget to circle back! 😝

[@katesample523]

Priceless!!! Xiaoma, you brilliantly handled your critics! 😄 I love your channel!

[@dianaklien1560]

Thank you for the smiles and chuckles this brought me. Such a cute and funny concept, which you pulled off wonderfully!

[@devinodonnell1989]

It's impressive that you've had the bandwidth to leverage this platform to crowd source interest in languages and build concencus that you're a key player. Collaboration with your partners has allowed you to blue-sky a lot of key enablers for the community.

[@tstcikhthys]

*consensus. You should really research how to leverage the tools of your trade to address such POI that are low-hanging fruits in the future to exponentially scale your returns.

[@frankieslight]

bruh the way this has me cracking up man 🤣🤣🤣 Loved the tailor guy sense of humor lmao

[@LowerTheBoom]

Don't forget "Circle Back"!!!! Remember "Circle Back Psaki"! 🤣

[@jayk7781]

This was genius! LoL! Loved it, you really crushed our Q1 Expectations w/that forward thinking attitude!

[@Designed1]

As the face of a soulless corporate enterprise that currently has a monopoly over the entire fishing industry in the Northern Atlantic Ocean, I can attest that his accent and mannerisms absolutely hit the mark here.

[@waltroskoh8650]

Curious, what company is this that has the fishing monopoly?

[@Designed1]

@@waltroskoh8650 i made it up for the joke but there's prob a real one out there idk

[@neptunemike]

Did he SHOCK the locals? 😂

[@TheCommentsWhisperer]

Xiaoma, you already have a real job. It's a new world. It's true, with your college degree, foreign language, and people skills--- you could probably have any job you wanted, at a higher wage. But, you are doing what you want. You can set your own hours. You're self employed. You have financial subscribers and advertisers. You are being recognized even in foreign countries. You also sell a product-- your language learning programs. Don't let anyone tell you that you don't have a real job. I think you have one of the best jobs in the world. You are doing what you like, and most importantly you are serving humanity by spreading love, appreciation, and community wherever you go. Keep up the great work, and the new world real job. ❤❤❤❤

[@astroorbis]

New Yorker here, I'd say you synergize well with the environment and really bring a lot to the table

[@engineear5571]

You clearly did you due diligence studying and leveraged your understanding of how languages work. This video exceeded my expectations.

[@SixStringHarmonies]

Just touching base - Well done. Bringing so much value to your customers. The synergy is oozing from every orifice. Keep in touch.

[@Unamusedtroll]

Love you showcasing your funny and self aware side more

[@BlastedBilly]

thanks for the laughs!

[@burritoshake]

the perfect april fools video, more joking videos like these would be amazing

[@RedwoodGeorge]

What a wonderfully creative curve ball! Glad to see your skills apply in other areas as well!

[@user-245er4ud]

More of this, please!

[@jbjaguar2717]

With my gratitude hat on, I'd just like to say this video really ticks all the boxes. I'm super passionate about the added value you delivered and I'll be sure to slot in more impressions of your content into my calendar.

[@andrewhardwick4480]

lol

[@jamesmcadory1322]

This is incredible I’m so glad you made this video😂

[@My2ndnephew]

This is hilarious! Thanks for the humor.

[@sbsftw4232]

This is one of the funniest ones you've done, wouldn't mind more of this style haha

[@quentinl6256]

Xiaoma really brings a lot to the table in this video. Great integration of key concepts and good synergies in the short video format.

[@_ao101]

This video was exceptionally well-crafted, showcasing a remarkable blend of strategic insight and creative execution. A true testament to collaborative excellence within the corporate sphere. The team has certainly set a high bar for industry standards, underscoring our commitment to innovation and thought leadership. Well done on achieving such a significant milestone.

[@corporalclegg914]

perfect. at the end of the day, it is what it is & throwing her under the bus was a way of deflecting accountability. we weren’t projected to be doing this well at scale, but the Q3 numbers don’t lie…and with nominal growth in Q4, we expect to see the trend line shift upward as the market settles.

[@pinakadhara7650]

Hilarious! The suit salesman had a great presence of mind!

[@private464]

LOVE IT...concept and follow-through!

[@dammitjim9131]

omg ... this is so hilarious! 🤣Love this skit. Hope Xiaomanyc does more of these.

[@clivepereira123]

Impressive how you've pivoted to a new realm without reinventing the wheel. It really maximise ROI while keeping overheads down. Great job 👍

[@Dan5819]

Real job? You have a full time REAL JOB, Ari! You are one in a zillion!

[@lastuberman]

Great video. You are a rock star and really hit this out of the park.

[@cb9600]

🤣🤣I wanted to reach out and tell you that was funny.

[@HarlekinGer1]

I'll circulate this in the wider group of my IB buddies. Very innovative and stellar execution. Keep pushing!

[@ragtop63]

As someone who spent 30 years in the corporate world, I absolutely can’t stand when people talk like this. This is pretty funny though 😂

[@sdjslkdjlsskldjslkdjsl8262]

Speaking corporate jargon with optimal levels of diversity, synergy and dynamism has always been the flywheel of Xiaoma.

[@mrq127]

This video is a game changer. It really hit the nail on the head, especially since it hit the ground running. I'll keep in touch, see you after Q4.

[@ThaiTalkwithPaddy]

That was a hilarious idea for a video! 😂

[@hheaterr]

Piggy-backing off the other comments, this video really pushed the boundaries of innovation and inspired us to revamp our content strategy for Q4. We''ll be in touch about next steps. Cheers Xiaoma!

[@Grnch970]

I never knew this was a language

[@codyf3419]

CEOs talk like this. They all suck.

[@organizedmicrowave4414]

@@codyf3419 Even students at my college talk like this. It's annoying, but pretty funny sometimes lol

[@paigechu]

100% spot on. Also glad to see everyone chiming in.

[@TravFletch]

If someone is in your comments saying get a real job they need to get a life!! You’re amazing!!

[@freakstarrguy]

That one is not easy, you did pretty good.

[@andpini]

this is hilarious!

[@nelz2012]

Best one yet. A real game changer.

[@NearShoreLiving]

Looooolll! This was easily your best video yet.

[@clonebin0]

this is genius LOL

[@joker3092]

Corporate jargon is more lingo than language. 😂

[@charlieg2262]

This is my favourite video you’ve done

[@Andrea-xs4ny]

Pleased to receive this before EOD. Let's circle back soon. I'm excited to see what language you bring to the table next!

[@zombie1376]

Did he just copy everyone of my interviews am from Chicago I talk like this lmfao how would you do this interview with the Chicago accent 💀 NYC kid with a Chicago accent I would be dying I have been watching your video for many years now and It always brings me joy stay salf in your travels much love ❤

[@mprovin7320]

Lol the shithousery

[@joanneb3524]

I have to go to therapy now. I worked so hard to get over my trauma of corporate life. Years of work undone in a few minutes. I'll get on that performance improvement plan and submit my outline in bullet point format by eob today. Thx!

[@namasteavl]

This is hilarious! Well done.

[@aaronwasserman3637]

This video is spot on! Too funny.

[@Amharizz]

This was fun. I want a longer video.

[@MeganOliveri]

Good god, you got the corporate bro outfit down perfectly. This was hilarious, great video!

[@bhambhole]

A creative concept. Well produced.

[@Brettastic8740]

This is really funny. Great video!

[@jhirst7323]

More comedy sketches please. This was brilliant.

[@SyenPie]

LMFAOOO this was actually brilliant, you should make skits more often!

[@Clipzilla95]

This is nuts, I subconsciously have picked up (and use) all of these terms at work 🤣

[@natenatters]

I thought it take years of practice for corporate jargon, you always amaze me how quickly you pick these languages up! Although, the transoations didnt work, it was still all in jargon 😆

[@sleepylovesu431]

Yep this is legendary amazing man

[@yb3604]

this is a serious channel lmao how is the skit so fire

[@IndianaJake]

Funny stuff!! should have more views

[@vonSmash]

Hahahha best thing I've seen in a long while! And your pokerface is solid xD I would crack after everything single thing you said 😁

[@am74343]

And with this video, I really felt that you've undergone a massive paradigm shift to the year 2005! It was almost as if you laid a new foundation to further your unequaled passion for climbing the corporate ladder! We'll have to catch up soon and touch base over a latte one day after the daily grind! Ciao!

[@egohicsum]

omg that language seems so complicated really impressive what you pulled off ❤️

[@Sam-shushu]

How exciting! At last, my native mode of communication is on display! 继续努力， 你会达到目标的。

[@israel_started_it_ALL_in_1948]

your best video yet.

[@fredngo]

OK bravo, this was hilarious!😆

[@Automatik234]

This has got to be your most hilarious language learning video so far!

[@jameslittle2137]

A work of art 🫡