Make Marmite | Full Task | Taskmaster

Bob Mortimer, Aisling Bea, Sally Phillips, Nish Kumar and Mark Watson attempt to make the best possible Marmite spread from memory in this full task from series 5.
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In this Broadcast Award-winning, BAFTA and Emmy Award-nominated entertainment show, Taskmaster tyrant Greg Davies (Man Down, Cuckoo), with the help of his loyal assistant Alex Horne (The Horne Section and the show’s creator), sets out to test the wiles, wit and wisdom of five hyper-competitive comedians.
Comedians that have risked life, limb, and dignity in the hope of making the Taskmaster proud so far include: Frank Skinner (The Frank Skinner Show), Mel Giedroyc (The Great British Bake Off), Romesh Ranganathan (Asian Provocateur), Hugh Dennis (Outnumbered), Sally Phillips (Bridget Jones’ Diary), Rose Matafeo (Edinburgh Comedy Award Winner 2018), and Russell Howard (The Russell Howard Hour). Unaware of what awaits them in each wax-sealed envelope, only one competitor can become the victorious owner of His Royal Task-ness’ golden head and be crowned the next Taskmaster Champion.

[@del_eris]

"So your main selling point is it's all edible?" I think that is the main selling point of real Marmite.

[@del_eris]

Kinda goes with Sally saying, "This is the best Marmite because it is NOT Marmite." 6:57

[@marvinkitfox3386]

Marmite is EDIBLE? wow, I learn new things every day. I mean I know he stuff is tasty. I love it actually. But it is about as edible and healthy as black-burned toast that had been drowned in salt. .....tastes a bit like that, too, come to think of it.

[@del_eris]

@@marvinkitfox3386 I thought it being yeast-based was supposed to make it kind of healthy? Or at least have good nutritional value.

[@bruhmoment1835]

@@del_eris vaginal infections are also yeast-based. Not very nutritious.

[@marvinkitfox3386]

@@del_eris Good nutrition, yes. If you ignore that it consists of about 10 percent PURE SALT

[@uwu-pe2nt]

I’m not from a country where Marmite is being sold. Before this video I had no idea what it tasted like, and I feel like I’m even further from the answer now

[@u.s.1974]

Be glad your taste buds never had to have contact with that salty goo. Never eat anything that ends in -mite. No Marmite, no vegemite. I am sure even termites are more edible.

[@hawc243]

@@u.s.1974 With marmite less is more.

[@mr.rabbit5642]

I hoped I'd find the explanation in the video, then in comment section, yet I'm still wondering if marmite isn't some type of manure mix LMAO

[@hawc243]

@@mr.rabbit5642 it's a dark coloured tar like spread made from yeast extract. It's quite strong & salty and has iron, foliate etc in it too well at least the NZ one does

[@lazydroidproductions1087]

Well you see, it taste like the most delicious salty burnt dirt you would have ever had, and traditionally has the consistency of engine grease. Quite lovely really

[@iamarprestar]

"put a cow in a room till it withers"

[@JarvisChrist]

gotta get that residue

[@zdw306]

After about 40 days of the cow being in the room, you can scrape a bit off the hoof

[@ahobbit1273]

I’ve seen this before, but I forgot about that line and almost choked on the biscuit I was eating when he said that

[@js0988]

Or take a shit in a jar.

[@LazarusIsBackBaby]

Sometimes I think this show and/or all of human history is just an interdimensional alien's random word generator.

[@hayleighbond9132]

The dedication Alex has for the show is admirable.

[@KodakYarr]

Well it's apparently his show so I'm not surprised!

[@melonlord1114]

But at the same time, he really didn’t have to take such big bites 😂

[@superd9072]

Always he's been a big eater

[@SennaAugustus]

"Have you ever regretted doing this show?"

[@Czeckie]

he's paid a lot of money

[@danieljensen2626]

The real question is how did Bob get the cow to wither in 10 minutes instead of 40 days?

[@petertaylor4980]

He used a pre-withered cow.

[@del_eris]

just a couple of quick jaunts in a TARDIS imagine Bob - or any of them - as The Doctor, but just playing it as themselves/their comedy personas.

[@del_eris]

@@petertaylor4980 is that the same as jerky?

[@TheKeebster1]

Fuji 9, of course!

[@waynedas873]

The other real question is how he made the best Marmite, while obviously trying to make Bovril.

[@darthplagueis13]

Sally abandoning the concept of marmite and instead just having absinthe on toast is a mood if I've ever seen one...

[@ConstantChaos1]

If you have 2 pieces the 2nd will taste exactly like what you remember marmite tasting like

[@ett100]

The more I watch of Sally the more I’m convinced she’s an absolute nutter!

[@lxathu]

Her decisions between playing the game or being a lovely lunatic gives her the well-deserved image of an eternal adolescent.

[@Lainge]

god I wish you kids would just talk like normal fucking people

[@shehranazim4784]

@@Lainge Us kids are now the "normal fucking people", old man. Now go get back on your Zimmer frame and shuffle back to the hospice please.

[@KrisCasey4]

it’s not the color that I’m worried about... it’s the SOUND

[@del_eris]

Nish gagging on that concoction while Alex maintains his composure is great. Alex's skills are underrated.

[@jhugs4books227]

@@del_eris Alex liked it lol

[@benjaminlamothe2093]

When I first saw Nish's concoction I thought he'd litterally had shat in the jar

[@WhirligigStudios]

I'm fairly certain Sally's plan was to get Alex so pissed he couldn't remember what Marmite was supposed to taste like.

[@zanizone3617]

I'm convinced Bob Mortimer must have magic powers. The man can do anything. His own dentistry? Piece of cake. Cut hairs for an entire camp of football fans in Spain? Easy peasy. Chase the Gulf Stream in a grotesque latex mask? That's just what you do on a holiday. Create a proper marmite substitute in 10 minutes? Pftt! Not even a challenge!

[@enixon8268]

Don't forget...rip an apple in two with his hands.

[@Sammie1053]

Not just cut hair for an entire camp of football fans. Cut hair for an entire camp of football fans, paid exclusively in egg sandwiches.

[@sparo_splat]

Also haunt gardens in his spare time.

[@georgiegan]

If you got FUJI 9, you're a dentist.

[@zanizone3617]

@@enixon8268 can't believe I forgot that! And peel an egg shell in one without breaking it!

[@LindsayRaeToro]

i would've loved to see Rhod do this one. he wouldn't even try to win, he'd throw the worst stuff in possible just because he knew Alex would have to taste it.

[@alotofthings22]

From what I've seen of this show, it would have been just as likely for the second part of the challenge to be for them to eat it themselves.

[@jackjon7763]

Yeah one episode was make an exotic sandwich. The. The next task was eat it as fast as possible

[@schwig44]

@@jackjon7763 poor mel, that sandwich was bigger than she was

[@michaeldiaz5469]

Sally seemed like she had the most fun possible on this show that she coulda ever had

[@benglaser1345]

I mean Rhod might have given her a run for her money.

[@A-G-A-G]

Drinking absinthe will do that to you

[@michaeldiaz5469]

@@A-G-A-G thanks for replying to me, it got me to rewatch this amazing clip again.

[@aadler1000]

@@michaeldiaz5469 And rewatch it a second time :)

[@nommyyt]

One of my favorite tasks. My three favorite moments are Alex's reaction to Sally's Absinthe Toast, Bob going "Oh fuck!" at Nish's marmite, and "he told me it tasted fuck all like marmite". This season was great.

[@anitasusan9865]

I DO NOT know how Alex is still alive.... It's like he's punishing himself 😂😂

[@del_eris]

Maybe he, um... maybe he likes it. 👉👈

[@electromika]

@@del_eris This show is just an easy way of getting his masochistic side satisfied

[@SixteenJacobsCreams]

Honestly it looked pretty fun

[@giantnerd14]

My favorite moment is still the absinthe toast.

[@carjaroo]

We need the extended version of Alex on Absinthe!

[@ConstantChaos1]

We also need absinthe

[@ZanraiKid]

"Fuck all like marmite" is such an iconic line.

[@del_eris]

- Bob's entrance: *the best* - Nish says "How's it hangin'?" & Alex says "What do you mean?" : *also the best* - Sally + absinthe: *ULTRA the best*

[@doublelxp]

I completely empathize with Alex's inability to process casual greetings.

[@marvinkitfox3386]

Beef cubes, and *dark* soy sauce. Virtually indistinguishable from Marmite by appearance or taste, although without a very good blender the texture will be a bit grainy.

[@ConstantChaos1]

I mean it kinda makes sense

[@Jtngetabettername]

That's probably what Bob did

[@LemonGrinder]

Oo, I might try this, since I have both dark soy sauce and a sort of creamy beef bouillon that doesn't have the same granularity. I also think that you could get rid of the grains by just heating the soy sauce up a bit so it'll melt the cube.

[@LemonGrinder]

8:10 Love that Nish's jar is labeled Kumarmite 😂

[@GordonHugenay]

Love the clinging-glass-sound effect at 4:19

[@del_eris]

I hadn't noticed that before. 😆

[@Orangecatinahoodie]

It was perfect

[@ConstantChaos1]

I watch alot of a specific drag youtube show than I'm sure I don't need to specify, that has alot of sound effects so it didn't even register to me but now that I remember this was on like actual TV that's hilarious

[@briancorr3668]

Sally Phillips is the most charming woman alive.

[@bryandavis8812]

I find her incredibly attractive. She’s stunning

[@nommyyt]

She's a charming lunatic. And probably my favorite contestant along with Mel.

[@poxyclypse]

You should see her in _Year of the Rabbit._ She's in a couple of episodes of that. With the magnificent Matt Berry.

[@AeroGold1]

She's hilarious in the tv show Veep as the Finnish Prime Minister

[@sarairina]

@@AeroGold1 and she actually does the english accent of a Finn quite well. It does remind Swedish, but she says some words like a Finn speaking English would. I know cuz I am a Finn haha

[@martijnkosters9024]

Sally went: ‘I can’t make marmite, but I can make Alex eat Absynthe’.

[@KellyJoule]

I love the idea that Alex has never heard the phrase "how's it hanging" all of his life lol

[@madalinam6183]

He does this to Nish at almost every task. And he always sounds like he means it! Like he never heard anything other than "hi" or "hello" as a greeting

[@del_eris]

@@madalinam6183 His joy when someone called him "dude" was fantastic. Can't remember who it was. Maybe that was Nish too?

[@madalinam6183]

@@del_eris I think it was Doc Brown in season 2.

[@sparo_splat]

@@madalinam6183 Yes it was Doc Brown at the trolley task during his bridge rant.

[@del_eris]

@@sparo_splat Awesome. Thanks, I'm gonna rewatch that ep right now cuz I need some joy.

[@tensecondsplit5471]

Bob's smile at 5:20 makes me so happy. He's so proud he did well

[@NivMizzet89]

The instantaneous "8 pounds" delivery is still one of my favorite lines from Alex. Especially considering he knew what the rest of the task involved. :D

[@devonyhof516]

As an American, I am always distracted by how Greg says "puma".

[@joeyDrivez]

@@JonoRig it’s pooma for sure

[@allisonjohns4623]

I feel like he specifically plays it up and also says it constantly lolol

[@sbilldmilk]

The funniest part is how I pretty much expected the results to be the opposite. Nish was literally using marmite, Bob thought it was "beef extract"

[@Orangepie86]

Task: Make Marmite On paper: Horribly boring idea In practice: Hilarious and entertaining

[@shaukahodan2373]

Dont you just squeeze the life out of random vegetables, add salt and yeast, then let the pulp rot.

[@basstrammel1322]

What you said is quite like a stand up comedian's routine written out in text?

[@RoseKindred]

I have never had marmite but I want the Absinthemite.

[@ConstantChaos1]

You and me both

[@gkm2928]

It looks like it could incinerate your nose hair. But what the hell! You only live once

[@iheartbusterk82]

Nish’s concoction looks horrible. I couldn’t even imagine eating it. The absinthe toast continues Sally’s barrage at Little Alex Horne. I genuinely love when someone goes at him like that. And Bob Mortimer continues to be a national treasure. Also, Marmite is gross.

[@Jennyfisch]

The last sentence alone deserves an upvote

[@del_eris]

I really want to know what exactly was in Sally's two other jars.

[@SharinganMan]

nish's is horrible purely on the basis of containing marmite

[@del_eris]

1:57 for all your hearing Greg Davies saying, "I will be on you like a puma" needs.

[@madalinam6183]

Thank you! I needed that :)

[@del_eris]

@@madalinam6183 I figured someone on here would appreciate it. 😉

[@missharlendahyde]

Want a near death experience? Either watch this and nearly die laughing, or eat enough of these “marmite” concoctions...

[@cameronsmith3047]

or just eat marmite in general

[@amalofoto]

Definitely had the first one of those

[@austin9675]

My ribs, my face and the rest of my body hurts of laughter and I couldn't stop for a full 5 minutes. I was freaking crying😂😂😂

[@macm.3889]

Especially Sally’s one, but you have to eat it first, and then go for the rest

[@teampendragon8406]

Did anyone else outside the UK try Marmite for the first time because of this? I did. Tried it thinly spread on buttered toast. I didn't love it... but I didn't hate it, either. "Salt plus memories of meat" is a pretty good description, but throw in "slightly burnt toast" and that's pretty much it.

[@em4151]

Mix it with some whipped cream cheese to start. I love eating it and that’s how I’ve introduced others to it.

[@cassindra438]

how to make marmite: get marmite

[@frostyflames7864]

then find a way to make the marmite worse by pumping it with vinegar

[@sarahlabbe9779]

Get vegemite, add a drop of something else

[@99ilana]

Sally being a delightful lunatic as always

[@wiiuandmii7619]

Bob's Marmite: Another example of why he deserved to win. Also provided the titledrop! Aisling's Marmite: I do think she honestly thought it tasted like marmite. Not trying to cheat or anything, even. Mark's Marmite: Never thought something that looked indistinguishable from coagulated ink would taste like marmite. Sally's Marmites: God, Sally is the stateliest psychopath. Abesinthe marmite does not sound terrible though. Kumarmite: No.

[@kwamikiki5968]

Aisling there just gaslighting Alex the entire time 🤣

[@edwardv1255]

Sally is no doubt the #1 person on the list of people I'd like to stay home binge drinking with.

[@DerpingIsDerp]

I love alex horne!!

[@iheartbusterk82]

Never heard of him before watching Taskmaster and now I just love him to bits.

[@DerpingIsDerp]

@@iheartbusterk82 yeah same here! I dont know any of the contestants and then fall in love with all of them

[@adamarens3520]

Little Alex Horne. Never forget his littleness 😉.

[@iheartbusterk82]

@Adam Arens If I ever met him, I’d honestly have to refrain myself from loudly saying Little Alex Horne at him à la the Taskmaster.

[@adamarens3520]

Miranda Hester me too 😂

[@Sammie1053]

Am I the only one who wants to try absinthe on toast now?

[@marchanarch1728]

I love how Greg acts as if regular marmite doesnt look like sh*t

[@auronlupin1014]

Bob mortimer is a living legend.

[@BenRangel]

Gotta low how the recipe that used actual Marmite looked the shittiest, and the winner was the man who thought marmite was withered cow.

[@richard26193]

Sally is such a treat of a person!

[@TheChocolateEagle]

oh lord sally had me in literal tears

[@WadjetEye100]

“Have you ever regretted?” is a mood

[@russelljohnson7004]

2:24 is such a powerful moment

[@JayRutley]

"I will be on you like a puma"

[@calvinthegreat69]

Nish has such an infectious laugh. Gets me everytime.

[@rubberface1424]

Sally Marmite is definitely one of Bob's real childhood friends.

[@simsandsurgery1]

I freaking love Bob Mortimer. 😂

[@emilyche1101]

Honestly thought Sally will get on my nerves but i love her unique brand of quirkiness.

[@La_sagne]

The Man, the Myth, the Mortimer... Bob Mortimer!

[@RealBenda]

Alex is reaching Steve-o levels of dedication.

[@thefrub]

Based on my wikipedia knowledge of what marmite is, I would mix soy sauce and hummus

[@somni6756]

It's amazing to me that the man who's first thought of how to make marmite was to "leave a cow in a room till it withers, and scrape up the residue" is the closest to Marmite. When he was in competition with someone who used actual Marmite. (Though technically Nish started with 100% Marmite and then diluted it so he found a new one creative way to lose.)

[@riaranta3150]

When she says “I have a yeast infection” And you reply 0:52 But you decide to go down on her anyway and on your first deep dive you come up for a breathe and tell her 6:23

[@trucy1337]

One of the best tasks of the show

[@megaverner]

The British: "That doesn't really have the colour or consistency of marmite, but he mostly used the correct ingredients, I wouldn't mind having that on my toast!" The world: "WTF IS MARMITE AND HOW CAN WE MAKE IT STOP?!"

[@eamonnwalker4512]

If you've had neither Marmite nor Vegemite, then your experience of this vast world and its... two sovereign states is sadly lacking, and it's high time to expand your horizons. (-- said the intoxicated yank who's spent a grand total of... _perhaps_ four months in the UK in his miserable life, and should undoubtedly be ignored flat out -- unless Lord Davies is reading this, in which case he should probably be flown into the UK in the interest of international bugger... that is to say, diplomacy).

[@shmwmlam3953]

Probably not world. Many countries familiar with Marmite and Vegemite. I am from Sri Lanka and Marmite is quite popular here. Also Vegemite is from Autraila which is also exactly same like marmite.

[@ghostarmies]

Bob Marmite also sounds like the name of a character in a Bob Mortimer on Wilty anecdote.

[@russelljohnson7004]

I just want a woman to look at me the way Aisling looks at Alex

[@innitbruv2]

Nish is the only person to make marmite worse 😂

[@sashwap]

there needs to be a whole series with just sally phillips

[@baitedlol6972]

I've never felt so sick after watching Taskmaster

[@felpshehe]

i never thought a toast could get you drunk... im adding it to my breakfast

[@timmyteehee9490]

I never thought id see absinthe on toast. Thank you taskmaster.

[@JoeMakaFloe]

Omg I just love Aisling Bea

[@del_eris]

Same. Very same.

[@iheartbusterk82]

I do too! I don’t get the people who think that she isn’t funny.

[@KalleJon10]

Miranda Hester I like her but she IS a bit much at times.

[@junlge1513]

The eyes, so angry.

[@Scartomuffin]

I love Bob

[@elizabethenas5640]

Somehow this is one my top favorite tasks

[@CodeCraftCouture]

i think about this one all the time.

[@HHh-ej4rl]

8:48 Us Irish will get you back for Marmite!! 🤣😁

[@JGILLENKY]

Best season ever!

[@Adrianovaz2007]

_tastes Marmite_ *SHIT* well you're on the right path Bob, lol

[@Cowlyyy]

Alex really makes this show.

[@barakul5648]

Literally. I believe it was his concept XD

[@Shearper2]

i have no idea what is going on in this series, but am quite enjoying it. youtube's algorithm works 1/100 times

[@victorianme3668]

I've never had Marmite in my life and I feel like an alien studying human

[@marvinkitfox3386]

Just be very, very careful to not get the Australian equivalent... the dreaded VEGEMITE. . that stuff is... it's.... well.... Let's just say it's an acquired taste.

[@sequae]

Bob Marmite, can I be your friend ?

[@rocketraccoon77]

My goodness Sally is so lovely and cute. 🥰🥰

[@10NobodyElse]

"What is yeast" GOT ME GOOD

[@strawberrylemonadelioness]

Strangely, this actually made me hungry

[@loriziell]

Little Alex Horne's Little Moments

[@sfshinz]

I would love to have Sally feed me absinthe toast.

[@auntlynnie]

6:10 “Have you ever regretted this show?” “NOT YET.”

[@fatgods2921]

Absinthe: the crystal meth of booze

[@Malzagi]

40 days and you get your first residue around the hoof.

[@EddieBayside]

Guess who's got nil POUA... Crying. 🤣

[@spellbinder3113]

I'm craving Marmite now... it's past midnight!

[@brianwalters8641]

As an American, and having watched this entire video....I still have no fucking idea what marmite is nor consists of.

[@parryyotter]

This is not disproving the widely held belief that Sally is UNHINGED.

[@fedipoiana]

Oh god, I lost my breath laughing

[@sambyers7653]

Imagine they had one American guest star this episode who read the task and just went "Marmite? What's marmite?"

[@iliketrains3495]

That pretty much happened in series 12 when Desiree was momentarily confused about ‘snukker balls’

[@echognomecal6742]

This task was originally proposed while Rhod & Noel were contestants &, unsurprisingly, Alex begged that it wait until they were no longer factors.

[@kenetabansi5016]

Meaning that Bob was onto something about that beef 🤔

[@AlexM-WI]

about the same production method as actual marmite: just scrap the gonk of whatever you happen to have at hand (in case of actual marmite: out of the brewing vessels)... ; )

[@randyastle3301]

I somehow managed to live two years in London without ever hearing of the existence of marmite. And now that I’ve seen this and looked it up I hope I never do again. Great job to Nish, though.

[@isabellaearnhardt6380]

Love it

[@zacwicht3189]

honestly ive had some miso soup that tasted like it was made by mixing marmite and hot water

[@GhostBear3067]

The best part is that the one who did not even know what is in marmite won.🤣

[@chumbawomba3298]

You know, he could've just looked at the ingredients on the marmite and then followed that to make his marmite

[@newrev9er]

Isn't Marmite made from a yeast byproduct left over from brewing? That might have been difficult to replicate.