Text Message Magic

[@lukehennessy3006]

Doctor: Hello. You have 3 weeks to live Jack. Jack: Ten of hearts.

[@rasmasinternational4487]

😂

[@pausebeforeviewtube]

that's both funny and sad :( :D

[@ryanekapanjisuhartanto7167]

Or else he will be fired

[@bojackson3073]

pausebeforeviewtube dark humor

[@KirbyMobile1]

Wow. That's completely accurate

[@CookingWithJackDaniels]

So when you say “hey VSauce, Michael here.” You’ve really been telling us that it’s a 5 of hearts?

[@syrenityx]

Tyler Nichols underrated comment

[@durdleduc8520]

he has five hearts pumping in that overactively omniscient body of his

[@shlok975]

It's ! Not .

[@sliut1]

Damm, that is a progamer move

[@Horeeification]

This should have way more likes

[@notvsauce4999]

Other people: *Make a cut to avoid unnecessary parts in the video* Michael: *Talks about the psychic energy between him and his friend in the bathroom*

[@Blizzard199X]

*Testing Room A

[@nolanwestrich2602]

It's fun to imagine other youtubers doing the same. 3blue1brown: "Ah yes, I can feel the psychic energy of this derivative. It's moving through me.. wispering to me... that the answer is 2e+π²!"

[@quinn7894]

*and hannah who's worshiping a butcher knife*

[@General12th]

@@nolanwestrich2602 I'm trying to imagine a situation where the solution to a definite derivative or integral could be 2e + pi^2. Outside of some trivial cases -- like what's the first derivative of (2e + pi^2)x -- I can't actually think of anything yet.

[@sh1nryel754]

@@quinn7894Its her friend, excuse you

[@LukaJebo]

Michael: Hey VSauce, Michael here. Me: 5 of hearts

[@jplveiga]

Luka Jebisashvili 6 of hearts

[@2xmc757]

@@jplveiga Depends on whether you take vsauce or michael for his name

[@austinbryan6759]

@@2xmc757 and Michael did specify proper name so it should be the Michael one.

[@ShadowRyutoji]

@@austinbryan6759 He also said any proper name, so...

[@johnparker9345]

Also this sentence probably ends with an exclamation mark.

[@Oshimimers]

Michael: Let’s just go and find Jack.... Hannah: 🔪

[@Endorcer]

Typical hannah

[@catalyst2.095]

_help him they're trapped_

[@ff3c74]

_and i just finished playing DDLC too..._

[@3ckitani]

@@ff3c74 Yuri be like

[@Jose-or3hq]

@@3ckitani that's my line

[@imaginary_Kyle]

When Michael found out that he had become a meme, he had two choices: fight it, or embrace it. And boy, did he embrace it.

[@DaxterL]

Or it has corrupted him

[@combine8269]

He has not embraced the meme, the meme has embraced him.

[@tea-tea-t]

@@combine8269 He's Russian?

[@PsyFyFungi]

@@tea-tea-t hes not russian, hes taking his time

[@earomc]

He isn’t a meme

[@user-lp7tx1fe6t]

I believe this channel is just elaborate vsauce shitposting

[@darkmatter69420]

Spitposting*

[@heyandy889]

@@darkmatter69420 exactly. this is a family show. remember that, ding-dongers!

[@AnotherAnon]

Ex-squeeze me?

[@BrnBear]

But I do respect these guys' intellect

[@christopherramsey7027]

Sh!tposting

[@dragonhunter485]

An elaborate setup of mirrors from the bathroom to the studio would be more impressive

[@psyche9580]

386 likes and no reply’s? wtf 🤣

[@7scarld170]

425 likes and 2 replies? wtf 🤣

[@NotFine]

433 likes and 3 replies wtf? 🤣

[@bagel040]

443 likes and 4 replies?! Wtf 😆😉😳

[@imamhossain4801]

I have decided to break this trend because I have no idea what the hell these people are trying to do.

[@sixthreload4057]

Hannah:*is dragging a body bag out of the studio Michael: "there's Hannah"

[@edvinisgaming3509]

but she wasnt dragging body

[@jeremiah9913]

mincegaming350&minecraft But you don’t understand humor

[@edvinisgaming3509]

Jeremiah that is disgusting humor then

[@theterribleanimator1793]

@@edvinisgaming3509 learn to take a joke. Edit: mispell.

[@Satan-lb8pu]

@@edvinisgaming3509 "I don't understand" "That was a joke" "The joke must be dumb, I certainly am not the problem"

[@theskewbicleus6763]

17:15 "ACE OF SPADES" I also love how he was so confident when he said it.

[@qwertacious.]

I didn't realize he said ace of spades instead of eight of spades

[@mariovelez578]

wait he said ace of spades? I just heard 8 of spades and went along with it

[@livedandletdie]

yup he said ace of spades, however 8 and ace is similar enough that just the visual of the 8 throw you off and think he said 8.

[@notglenn1703]

I heard that too and I immediately went to comments to see if anyone else noticed it lmao.

[@Iradicos]

"EVERY, TIME!"

[@shpoogly]

It feels like the bigger Michael's beard gets, the weirder he becomes.

[@darraghclarke2884]

Cringalicious when it reaches Santa Claus lengths he will actually start going down chimneys.

[@sapphiro]

But that's how all beards work 😄

[@h4724-q6j]

Michael's beard will continue to grow until he uploads on the main channel. D!NG Michael and Vsauce Michael are in an eternal battle of the beards.

[@astolenusername7675]

Cringalicious why would someone’s beard dictate their mental state?

[@NeverGonnaGiveyuCheese]

Tru

[@TheScienceNerd100]

Lawyer: Hi, jack, we have your divorce papers. Jack: 2 of hearts

[@t-rex9809]

Epic, I left 200th like.

[@supremeleaderchase7339]

Epic, I left 506th like.

[@ali_seyedin]

Epic I left 542th like.

[@playeruan]

Epic, I left 550th like

[@scottcarothers837]

Epic, I left 582nd like.

[@KashNoK]

1:28 We have taken Jack-who works here at Vsauce-and locked him away. Man, it must be fun to work with Michael.

[@MJA-05]

ᴸᴼᴸ

[@cheesecakelasagna]

He's a tyrant like Link from GMM.

[@Forester_Master]

14:17 Rare sight of Michael letting out his dark side.

[@danielmarroquin5106]

Why no comments

[@eliyahupyasik526]

"He might've gone back to work... which is NOT acceptable!"

[@208xj]

Lol

[@pops3212]

Rare?

[@vincentpenschke500]

Sounds like tourette syndrome lol

[@AxiomApe]

1:39 *"K. There's Hannah"* 🔪 ( _casually holding a large knife_ ) *normal, totally normal.* 🔪

[@CaveyMoth]

I think she turned into Chara.

[@ninof_yt8303]

Right there like Not planning murder

[@HungryGuyStories]

There must be a rival for her senpai around...

[@None17555]

I think it's really cool that you watched the video and noticed that and then shared it.

[@buckykaiser]

Hannnah, Give me your friend.

[@LivingParadox87]

"Maybe he's in the refrigerator? Oh no, of course he wouldn't be. That would not be safe."

[@Polylep]

Maybe he is in the trashcan?

[@whenthe531]

@@Polylep probably in testing room b, not sure tho

[@motazfawzi2504]

17:16 "Ace of spades" Michael claimed confidently.

[@DiegoPerez08]

Motaz Fawzi that was an ester egg to the song

[@orvinal2883]

yea saw that

[@MarcelAlexandra]

I glad I not the only one who noticed

[@austinbryan6759]

Woah I didn't notuce the first time

[@James-le8gd]

@@MarcelAlexandra yeah i heard that too but maybe he was trying to say eighth of spades

[@nathanalbrightmusic]

17:16 *Michael throws down and EIGHT of spades* Michael: BOOM! ACE of Spades!

[@EagleJet420]

*EVERY* *TIME*

[@jared8515]

*IT'S THE ACE OF SPADES!* *THE ACE OF SPADES!*

[@xmbovlogs]

its the only one he needs

[@MrSen4lifE]

It sounds like he realized as he was saying it. _"Aceghts of spades"_

[@gingapi2493]

'EVERYTIME'

[@cliffsmith8286]

17:16 *flips over 8 of spades* “ACE OF SPADES!”

[@darrenmikes]

eight is pronounced similarly to ace

[@robertnagy3942]

*_IF YOU WANNA GAMBLE, I'LL TELL YOU HOW IT'S DONE, YOU WIN SOME , LOSE SOME, IT'S ALL A GAME TO ME.._*

[@qmelon4263]

Like having sex with someone who can’t speak is it consent or is it not ItS A gAmBLe

[@DarkShroom]

@@qmelon4263 but admittedly if you where just to ungag her she could probably talk fine

[@andrewreese6342]

@@darrenmikes turn on subtitles. It's Ace.

[@X-Gen-001]

I'd be more concerned about Hannah walking aimlessly around with a butcher knife. Micheal: Whatcha doing today Hannah? Hannah: Whatever the voices tell me. Micheal: Alrighty then.

[@Adam-xf6sq]

Ready? jack, it’s time to guess the card. This is Hannah, jack had an... accident Okay then

[@karenbenton1503]

@@Adam-xf6sq how could he have had an accident he was on the pooper 🚽

[@lubomirkubasdQw4w9WgXcQ]

You spelled his name wrong

[@X-Gen-001]

@@lubomirkubasdQw4w9WgXcQ I'm so glad you're around to let me know. lol Yeah I know my spelling is horrendous.

[@sclompers]

It's more concerning the knife is her friend

[@GermaphobeMusic]

0:45 When someone asks me why I'm subscribed to D!NG

[@doctornewell4771]

"I-I watch it for the plot!"

[@keagandunham5014]

What happened to the name DONG? Was it inappropriate

[@federicomariacampisi]

@@keagandunham5014 what do you mean? this channel has always been called D!NG

[@BraxtonKovary]

Thicc booty

[@yaboicash6666]

Federico Maria Campisi You say that as if their could have been any possible other name for this channel D!NG

[@Lioncub56]

Hannah: *is holding a knife and being suspicious* Michale: There’s Hannah Hannah: 👁👄👁🔪

[@emmettsantos1204]

💁🏼‍♀️🔪

[@DrewWutsit]

Glad I'm not the only one who noticed

[@Tosh.O]

hannah is someone you always need to keep an eye on

[@lemonsaaa]

Mic (in) hale

[@laila4146]

Yuno Gasai kin

[@republicofsingapore177]

Jack: My dad speed walks Michael: He might not be your real dad

[@braidenbetts1518]

Miguel Angel 3:04

[@livedandletdie]

Sick burn. Although I guess it's just text filler to not show anything they've written in the past.. in the video.

[@coyotedomino]

It’s all special effects or robots or mirrors. There’s no way.

[@coyotedomino]

Matrix29bear (correct that to faux pa and your pun is totally amazing)

[@goxs9999]

Or is he?????

[@xijinping1099]

“Hannah, give me your friend.” *hands Michael a kitchen knife*

[@thecoolaxolotlnova8523]

Hand over the friend hannah!

[@tuesdaywithanh]

I'm for sure friends with my kitchen knives. It's dangerous to go in there otherwise

[@jonahs92]

It's for him to use to circumcise her!

[@Fedico7000]

Jonah S Seek help

[@fogscourt]

Michael: "Hannah, give me your friend" Me: *Shudders*

[@suyashmullick2333]

12:35 Jack's contract says, " Stay in the bathroom or you will be fired!" That's brutal, or is it?

[@realbland]

REALEASE THE CONTRACT

[@zakramsey3508]

Is that a joke?

[@tecked5609]

Zak Ramsey of course

[@nadaotk]

@@zakramsey3508 no.

[@willevans6032]

@@zakramsey3508 no

[@BlyeGuy]

I hope Jack is conditioned now: "Hey Jack, have you finished *work task*?" "5 of spades!" "No, we are done with this video Jack!" "Ace of Diamonds, I'd say" "Okay Jack, you can stop" "Ace again, but this time Ace of Clubs" "I hope you're still in that bathroom.." "I don't know, I feel like somethings missing..."

[@AlexKnauth]

hahhhaahaa!

[@Yusso]

"Hello, Jack? Your wife called me in the middle of the night because you haven't been at home yet and she is worried! Where are you?" "8 of spades!"

[@MCWaffles2003-1]

Jacks wife: "Hello? Jack? the police are here asking me when/where I last saw you. Just come home were worried about you!" Jack:"Jack of diamonds!" Jacks wife: "Michael here. NO! Queen of diamonds jack! You're fired!" Jack: "Ace of Diamonds"

[@MiMiBrokenbourgh]

Ace of Heaarts (yes that extra a was intentional)

[@PeepsMichael]

Michael is being held hostage by Hannah. Blink twice if it’s true, Michael.

[@oogaboogaboy4525]

Ace of Hearts

[@buubaku]

He can't, he never blinks

[@kandyappleview]

Hannah was holding jake hostage. He got away but not before Hannah could cut off his e with her knife and got Michael. So now jack is hiding in the bathroom using marked cards to communicate with Michael.

[@pixelpuddinge2888]

0_0 -_- 0_0 -_-

[@mkm8535]

@@buubaku Blink once

[@eliredacted8130]

My name is Jack and hearing Michael look for someone named Jack activated my fight or flight response

[@durdleduc8520]

Michael: Jack’s in the bathroom, let’s find him A random Jack on the toilet: that caveman spongebob meme

[@GuyMichaely]

Which option did you choose

[@nickjonathan4043]

When he opened test room A it would open up into your bedroom where you are peacefully sleeping. You see Michael during sleep paralysis. Hey Jack, Michael here

[@jezer8325]

@@nickjonathan4043 "Where are your fingers?" *stares into your soul*

[@mertgokce7332]

he will find you

[@SaadAhmed3000]

I'm convinced that this studio is a crack house, and these guys just do quirky math/science videos on the side.

[@mended8774]

Saad Ahmed because of the crack

[@kenworthkid998]

That just it that's the cover to keep the authority at bay

[@heathhall-muir2537]

Saad Ahmed 😂😂😂

[@rana4410]

You can tell 'cause Hannah

[@janmazur3111]

Ready? I love you Michael. You are the King of my Heart.

[@reyesbiencarlo1893]

r/wholesome

[@salvinorindoge3811]

hes more like the king of the universe but ok

[@deactivatedaccount6685]

Jan Mazur r/gay

[@tri99er_]

:3

[@vigilantcosmicpenguin8721]

This is actually a pretty good line.

[@nozra_z]

Jack: *Gets out of bathroom* Michael: "You're fired."

[@eldritchraz]

Jack: "Ace of hearts"

[@masoneaglin7545]

Jake from Vsauce 3 is hiding in Michael’s beard

[@majortom4543]

He was under the table going down under

[@iilikecereal]

if you look closely in certain frames you can see jake struggling to escape his beard

[@fartmerchant762]

@@majortom4543 Sucky sucky

[@Phychologik]

Knife: Exists Ad revenue: I'll stop you right there

[@clex2349]

Michael has abandoned Vsauce to become a living meme on D!ng

[@firefish111]

MemeSauce everyone

[@sossololpipi9633]

d o n g

[@ludwiggalaxy4277]

Memes On Piano yeah

[@GamebossUKB]

Michael: jack is honestly only in there with his phone. Also Michael: jack has a cheat sheet to translate our code.

[@zergterran7409]

Maybe rhe cheat aheet ia in hia phone 👀

[@ahahm3]

zerg terran yeah, maybe rhe cheat aheet really is in hia mobile phone

[@dreamguest3597]

it's really irrelevant cuz it can easily be memorized

[@LucidMlem]

@@zergterran7409 Beat me to it

[@sutfolsemaj]

@@zergterran7409 How do you have 4 typos in an 8 word sentence?

[@danielson894]

Michael: honey, whats the Vsauce password? Her: our aniversery, silly Michael: guess ill post on D!ng then

[@DanishAra]

*dong

[@JorgetePanete]

what's* I'll*

[@TrueFlameslinger]

@@DanishAra What's that? It sounds very Family Unfriendly and definitely not the channel name. It always has, and always will be, D!ng, just D!ng, and nothing but D!ng

[@TimelessTimothy]

@@TrueFlameslinger Sorry to break it to ya, but this channel's original name was... "Dong." Which stands for, "Do Online Now, Guys."

[@TrueFlameslinger]

@@TimelessTimothy Yes, we all know that. It's a joke. Go watch the start of the Topsy Turvy episode.

[@aloisio7975]

3:03 Michael: "It's all special effects or robots or mirrors. Theres no way" Jack: "My dad speedwalks!" Michael: "Im sorry but I doubt that. If he says he does then he is not your real dad"

[@mikecoffin9236]

Was looking for this comment.

[@giuseppenicotra2305]

Or is he? *Vsauce music starts*

[@RoNiobium]

oOo aAa eEe iIi mM M is my favorite show on KZbin (This is my most-liked comment so far. Thanks pals. Drink some water today)

[@tirarose]

That's my favorite part of just life. 😅😅😅

[@blankiecat9302]

oarim

[@robotronixgaming2933]

ici

[@duality6918]

I love the sub-plot of Hannah being crazy and possibly murderous

[@knrz2562]

Uh

[@hubbahubba5887]

Michael really never recovered from being inside that white room :(

[@jameswallace9906]

I knew something was up when the first text was sent to jack using jacks name No one does that

[@blokvader8283]

Yeah the hello was weird to me as well

[@streitsmith5306]

@@prakhar9473 JACK OF DIAMONDS

[@gabe6475]

Seems like something vsauce Mikhail would do

[@lxminesque9497]

Gabe Jones-Lang Michael*

[@t.2917]

I do, my friends do.

[@jasonwhyttes1679]

Texts: Micheal: "...Isn't even real." Micheal: "It's all special effects or robots or mirrors. Theres no way" Jack: "My dad speedwalks!" Micheal: "I'm sorry but I doubt that. If he says he does then he's not your real dad." Jack: *worried emoji* Micheal: *Cowboy emoji* Jack: *sad emoji* Micheal: *corn emoji* Jack: *chef emoji*?

[@Jamie-tx7pn]

Michael is such a memelord

[@durdleduc8520]

i believe it

[@southcoastairsports]

What’s the name of the cards and where can I buy them

[@dandelion6716]

No dude its an eggplant

[@HerbQuest]

17:16 "The ace of spades! Every time" *shows the 8 of spades*

[@wyattstevens8574]

Maybe he didn't remember it was the 8 and not the ace in initial position 40 or something.

[@willking1382]

I love ding! D- Michaels I- Descent N- Into G- Madness

[@Unknown50677]

err... that needs fixing

[@matiasgarciacasas558]

Unknown that's the joke

[@Unknown50677]

welp.. i didnt get it

[@Chevycamaro-rg6sd]

R/woooosh

[@disuko]

@@Chevycamaro-rg6sd Linking to subreddits outside of Reddit neither makes you cool nor interesting

[@bolson42]

Soon enough michaels beard is gonna develop its own conscious

[@grandpanoogie2665]

BOY, TO ME!

[@moto2442]

Hey Vsauce, Michael Here Beard with sauce in it: wow that is really upsetting I didn't choose to be like this. You did this to me

[@theoristnumber1173]

Are you implying that already hasn’t

[@loveordeath33]

*consciousness

[@parthgupta5058]

do you live in Australia?

[@mismag822]

I do something similar. First, the spectator picks a card. Let’s say it’s the 5 of hearts. I call Jack. He answers the phone and starts saying ACE, TWO THREE FOUR FIVE .... all the way to King. The second he says FIVE, I interrupt and say HI Jack. Jack now knows it’s a FIVE, so he starts saying CLUBS, HEARTS, SPADES DIAMONDS... as soon as he says HEARTS I interrupt and say “Name The Card”, so now Jack knows it’s a HEART. So you hand the phone to your spectator and Jack tells him the 5 of Hearts...... without you saying anything but “Hi Jack” and “Name the card”

[@johnchessant3012]

That's really good

[@Glatier]

damn I think I should try this

[@EVILGORIA]

That’s too obvious

[@nomekop777]

"You can feel the psychic energy between me, jack, the phone, and Hannah a little bit" Nah I think Hannah's just psycho 🔪

[@zaytaz9331]

@@avw5kt no, psycho is a psychopath, a person who has a tendency to love and do violence, its a sort of disease. The thing you are talking about is something all different tho, what ur talking about is phycic, magicians i think

[@tommyoreal]

​@@zaytaz9331🤓☝️

[@noahgraglia8025]

The longer his beard gets the more insane he becomes

[@SophTheLaunchTechnician]

soon he will do a video about how to vanquish his consious beard

[@tafarithehooligan]

Broooooooooo

[@matteofabbris7877]

And now he also gives you homeworks

[@wombat4191]

So he's like Wilson form Don't Starve? Well, Wilson gains sanity when shaving instead of losing it when growing it, but almost.

[@tofuuuuuuuuuuuuu]

Wombat Ah, I see that you are a man of culture as well.

[@catfoodsoda]

the thumbnail really reflects Michael's personality

[@dr.avalanche4994]

N i c o l e Erratic

[@mr.goochthethird1222]

*Looks at thumbnail* ...Yeah he knows what he's become

[@-qualitytop10things-81]

Hannah is holding a knife in the dark with a murderous face Michel:oh hey hannah

[@DanDart]

this is normal

[@voltaixlux1697]

"oOo-aAa-eEe-iIi-mMM" -Michael Stevens 2k19

[@CaveyMoth]

This episode felt like MMM and Michael's Toys combined into one.

[@yamen7998]

Yeah he definitely forgot his vsauce channel password....

[@majortom4543]

Mindfield hijacked Vsauce

[@yamen7998]

Lol

[@thinkingemoji5924]

Michael kilby That doesn’t sound true

[@ggs1019]

@@thinkingemoji5924 We have no evidence if its true or not lol so maybe true maybe not

[@Cpt_John_Price]

CheatsOn Not related to anything but. Your profile pic is disgusting btw.

[@omen2332]

3:02 look at the text messages Michael: "My dad speedwalks !" Jack: "I'm sorry but I doubt that. If he says he does then he's not your real dad."

[@scott_the_tatertaut3185]

That is amazing..

[@ChickenBiscuits]

You got the names wrong. It was Jack who was saying his dad speedwalks.

[@azureaqua_1177]

Lol

[@YesOkayButWhy]

My heart broke the moment Michael sent that message without fixing the lack of an apostrophe. Never meet your heroes indeed.

[@NikolajLepka]

Just as he wrote the text my immediate thought was: He's loaded the sentence somehow

[@NoriMori1992]

Niko L Same. Especially when the second one said "Hello ok Jack" which is a very unnatural phrasing.

[@NikolajLepka]

@@NoriMori1992 The way both sentences were structured immediately clued me into this

[@DarkPossum95]

I'm just waiting for a video where at the end Michael is like, "This actually wasn't math magic at all, it was sorcery, I am a wizard."

[@EnZoDxGaming]

Vrchat lewd? Judging by pfp

[@DarkPossum95]

@@EnZoDxGaming Lmao, mayyybe.

[@DarkPossum95]

@@theendarkenedilluminatus4342 Shh, we don't speak of that name.

[@doma3554]

And then he throws his beard over his shoulder by whipping it using his neck movement, hands free.

[@nonusernoyoutube]

"The card will be 8 of Spades! " "Down, under, down, under, down, under, down, under, down, under, Ace of Spades!"

[@DanielPfender]

I laughed hard especially when he just rolled with it

[@Spilled_Pizza]

I’d like to imagine this is how Michael talks to texts to everyone and he’s sending secret messages to everyone

[@ChadwickMann]

Nobody: Hannah: *Casually Inspects Knife*

[@zuko1569]

Michael trying to remember his password for Vsauce 0:00 - 0:09

[@opalxi]

I never knew zuzu watched vsauce-

[@SCRedstone]

@@opalxi who doesn't watch Vsauce tho

[@Ahmad-lz2ne]

maybe that's his actual password

[@nayankulkarni5131]

Michael forgetting his password to VSauce channel joke will never get old😂😂😂

[@Benzy670]

Zuzu it’s sad but Michael-forgetting-the-Vsauce-password jokes almost always make me laugh 😂 Please remember, Michael. 😩

[@magentamoth621]

*1:24* *We have taken Jack who works here at vsauce and locked him away...* *466 likes? I've gotten more : l*

[@MisterHunterWolf]

@Luke Kounkel ?

[@magentamoth621]

@Petraplexity wrong magenta avatar

[@MisterHunterWolf]

@Petraplexity magenta is just bright purple. That is bright purple.

[@magentamoth621]

@@MisterHunterWolf no it's not! (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

[@MisterHunterWolf]

@@magentamoth621 how else do i describe magenta?

[@Xezian]

michael's and jacks text conversation before he asks him about the card is really interesting, the last message with actual text we can see, we only see the bottom, and it just says "your real dad"

[@GunsandGuitars69]

You can see the whole conversation if you pause it at the right time

[@TeriyakiTakeout]

"Dear diary, after 3,724 takes, we have finally successfully matched the cards to the texts in one go. Sincerely, Michael"

[@sambalam]

i wonder if 3,724 is good luck or bad

[@plav6067]

king of clubs

[@johnrubensaragi4125]

@@sambalam very, very bad luck. You are expected to guessing it right with 52 attempts.

[@sibanbgd100]

@@johnrubensaragi4125 try 10^100

[@alexwang982]

@@johnrubensaragi4125 no, it can overlap

[@rohitchaoji]

"I leave that as an exercise for you, the viewer" It's like reading university textbooks all over again.

[@alexismandelias]

Obviously that's the joke

[@rohitchaoji]

@@alexismandelias Obviously everybody got it.

[@cappew22]

"Hey Vsauce, Michael here!" Sooo, 6 of Diamonds? (or hearts, clubs)

[@cybersilver5816]

That would be diamonds, because of the exclamation mark.

[@WhiteLie---------------------1]

It's one of ace and many more

[@brandont1940]

5 of diamonds because the pronoun/name is the first word after the salutations.

[@peshal0]

Vsause : I forgot my password to Vsauce ! Also Vsauce : O R D I D I ?

[@krisdoesart9643]

Ace of diamonds

[@RoNiobium]

That's the password

[@shellydas1416]

What is a password

[@comradecameron3726]

Me: Hey wasn’t this channels name dong? Micheal: Ding Dong your opinion is wrong.

[@Endorcer]

No need an explanation we just don't want any demonitization

[@amethystsamia]

It used to be Vsauce. dong was another channel I think. Then Vsauce be one Dong, then Dong became Ding. I’m so confused.

[@joe9832]

Wait, what's DONG? You mean D!ING, right?

[@dusty4102]

I think you mean “Ding D!ng your opinion is wrong”

[@coolusername6647]

He has already talked about this This channel was always Ding if you thing it was something more pg-13 you are wrong So nothing is different obviously

[@OMGLOL381]

Michael’s favourite playing card. 6 of Diamond How? You might ask. ‘Hey, vsauce, Michael here!’

[@mematthewme]

Mr.EDM Brilliant.

[@eddiefirstenberg1000]

Mr.EDM No, it’s 5 of diamonds

[@IudiciumInfernalum]

The proper name here is Micheal so you're a little off.

[@IudiciumInfernalum]

@Suani Avila Yeah but the position of the name is what determines the number.

[@OMGLOL381]

@@IudiciumInfernalum Google Michael Stevens dude and look how it's spelt

[@electricbuttercup7954]

*Hannah casually holding a knife in the background*

[@lucaslucas191202]

3:03 Michael: ...isn't even real. Michael: It's all special effects or robots or mirrors. Theres no way Jack: My dad speedwalks! Michael: I'm sorry but I doubt that. If he says he does then he's not your real dad Then they start sending smileys. Uhm wtf

[@hickyxnicky411]

omg why?!

[@lucaslucas191202]

@@hickyxnicky411 Probably to cover up their earlier texts and as a little joke. If you wanted a serious answer.

[@Klaevin]

6:44 grabs knife and acratches neck NO MICHAEL! DON'T DO IT! YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!!

[@DrorF]

2 of diamond?

[@DukeBG]

Hannah just casually showing off with a good clean knife is the best

[@Jamato-sUn]

A lesser-known, but commonly used tool in math magic :D

[@oscarmears607]

Fun fact: The text "Hey, Vsauce, Michael here." Would translate to the card being a 5 of Hearts. Hey=5, 6, 7 Vsauce/Michael= 5 Here"."= Heart Thank me later

[@blokvader8283]

Ooh except you're six months late.

[@krisdoesart9643]

Blok Vader you were two months late to their comment

[@jeelpatel231]

@@krisdoesart9643 4-1 = 3

[@schizoidman5957]

@@jeelpatel231 2+2-1 = 3÷1

[@Atm_0s]

"These are regular old bicycle playing cards..." Oh ok... wait a minute!

[@OF01975]

Sorry can u dumb down this joke a lil for all us non academic viewers

[@Benana-lq4ss]

@@OF01975 They're not standard bicycle cards, they're marked.

[@OF01975]

Benana2222 wait so they arent actual bicycles?

[@Jamie-tx7pn]

Bicycle playing cards is a brand of playing cards.

[@peterhu7039]

Nobody talking about Jack's real dad? Who doesn't speedwalk?

[@R2Cv1]

Oh, you said Jack and I thought "Jake". The guy in the testing room surprised me.

[@meaniepoopoo]

I knew something was up when Michael said "Hello Jack" on the second text

[@m0thy249]

3:03 Jack: "My dad speedwalks!" Micheal: "I'm sorry I doubt that. If he says he does, then he's not your real dad." Classic Micheal.

[@CoolMintMC]

*Michael. FFS

[@edwardzita3479]

That made me laugh, the subtle and hidden jokes in his videos are insane now

[@vgamerul4617]

@@CoolMintMC _michelle_*

[@nessbailey7931]

“It’s all special effects or robots or mirrors. There’s no way.”

[@NocturnalNick]

Jack: Sad face Michael: Cowboy face Jack: :O face (?) Michael: Corn cob Jack: Pig

[@stumbling]

Michael: Hey, Jack. Where the hell are you? You were supposed to be in the office 3 hours ago! Jack: 5 of diamonds!

[@zoe.h.nelson04]

I got a little suspicious when the texts were more complicated when they needed to be and were different every time, but had now idea how flexible the code was! Good trick man

[@Mr_Autastic]

Michael: "Hannah, give me your friend." *Hands Michael knife* Michael: "Thank you very much."

[@tuesdaywithanh]

You need to be friends with your knives, the kitchen becomes far too dangerous if you aren't

[@treve452]

"My dad speedwalks!" "I'm sorry but I doubt that. If he says he does then he's not your real dad." What's... What's the context behind this

[@mark-jf5ik]

It actually starts wayyyy back in maybe mid to late 20-digestion around the month of “begins in” the day of “the mouth” Anyway, what is a speedwalk?

[@trinalps]

speedwalking dad issues

[@lights473]

It's just Michael being Michael

[@revolver265]

"Hello ok Jack" sounded like an odd greeting so I felt like it was code, but I didn't realize you went dirty enough to mark the deck. Semantic satiation is also making "down" and "under" not sound like words anymore.

[@blackbox-music7637]

He would make the perfect supervillain. The kind that you can not predict his next move. The most dangerous kind.

[@DarqIce]

"He may have gotten back to work, which is NOT acceptable"... Man, I'd love to work at a place, where I get fired if I leave the WC or actually work :D :D :D

[@Gramer05]

I swear Michael is going insane/crazy every episode/video

[@MommaLuigi]

All great people are.

[@aaaaaaada]

micheal , blink twice if dOnG is holding you hostage

[@AnnikaBM7]

aada Hol’ up! That’s not very advertiser friendly!

[@raisu_5864]

No wonder hannah is standing there with a knife

[@ronny64bs]

@@AnnikaBM7 what's up with the D word? The even changed the name...

[@CoolMintMC]

*Michael

[@TheGodEmperorOfMankind_]

He's the one holding them hostage

[@mojojoji5493]

Michael debunking magic tricks before we even get to buy the box

[@mephistovonfaust]

Well, tbf... Marked decks are as old as playing cards and are used in card magic in actually forever. As a collector of playing cards I'm actually happy to have them in my collection, as a (hobby) magician I wouldn't have bought them though. I don't like to perform with gimmicks all that much.

[@mojojoji5493]

DezzyTee truuuuueeeeeee

[@overseerfifteen5383]

Michael, why are the restrooms labelled Test Rooms? *_why?_*

[@justnate01]

shh don't question it. or do, i'm just a shitposter

[@wyntryx7977]

*_DO NOT QUESTION THE EGG MAN_*

[@TheEgglet]

who summoned me

[@farazkhawaja4402]

Ace of Spades

[@lettuceman483]

Ace of spades

[@Prokuku5]

Anybody else questioning why Testing Room A is a bathroom?? Testing Room B should Be a Bathroom

[@RoNiobium]

It's A bathroom :3

[@mandiecarson1949]

Ding ding**

[@mujackanims3098]

An athroom

[@Nemo_Doko]

We'll never know^^

[@coolusername6647]

A is men’s room B is women’s room Because men before women obviously

[@u1timatepotato930]

No one: Michael: If he speedwalks, he can’t be your real Dad, Jack.

[@joefrayling9263]

Jack: Ace of hearts?

[@remboldt03]

*PLEASE* make a Video on VSouce in *old style* . Just throw it in randomly. Begin the Video with: _"Hey, VSouce. Michael here!"_ And then explain something unnecessary. I loved it so much. PLEASE. Make it for your og Community who loved your old videos so much!

[@channingtatum3356]

AOUCE

[@SaturnPaninaro]

"Hey, VSauce. Michael here!" Me after watching this video: SIX OF DIAMONDS

[@remboldt03]

KuroPaninaro xD

[@xorenpowell9675]

Yes

[@austinbryan6759]

He makes what he wants now, get over it

[@ВгостяхуЭндеркинга]

-Hey Vsauce, Michael here ! -6 of diamonds -Oh, hello, listen Jack, you were fired for leaving testing room A, remember? -Nine of spades -I’m serious Jack, the video is over. -Ace of hearts -Hannah, give me your friend -Ace of clubs -Hey Jack, how fast can you run ? -5 of spades ?

[@therationale2289]

I swear that D!NG videos keep on getting more and more cursed

[@OxyPox]

it's d!ng, this is a FAMILY FRIENDLY, ADVERTISER FRIENDLY show

[@logon-oe6un]

It has never been called anything but D¡NG.

[@andressegarra2376]

@@logon-oe6un It was called Dong.

[@logon-oe6un]

@@andressegarra2376 'Tis, of course, a reference, to a thing Michael of Vsauce said on the subject of the name change himself.

[@simonk4174]

@@andressegarra2376 no it wasn't whatre you talking about!?

[@OriLOK2]

When I subscribed to VSauce many many years ago I never thought it would lead to this moment, many channels later, watching Michael hold a dude hostage in a bathroom and making him text back codes.

[@virukinovicini9554]

3:03 "It's all special effects or robots or magnets. There's no way" "My dad speedwalks" "I'm sorry but I doubt that. If he says he does then he's not your real dad."

[@damamoot2291]

*shoves down 8 of spades* Michael: ACE OF SPADES!

[@farazkhawaja4402]

Da mamoot Ace of Diamonds

[@zidanidane]

-"my dad speedwalks!" -"that isn't your real dad"