Thanks, Dad | Ep. 124 - Lifeline

[@SupergoodStudios]

Bonus episodes over on patreon.com/lifelineluxury

[@lasvegascrisis]

@@SupergoodStudios this is just for Chris, Mobile Alabama sounds like Mo Beel

[@DranoelKing]

comment for the algo

[@DeAshaNapier]

47:28 that synchronization of them both emerging from laughter is everything

[@mattdelia]

Didn’t even know this happened until I watched the episode. Crazy!

[@tomsensale2104]

was gonna comment this lmao

[@ryanforesta1803]

Literally ugly-cry-laughing at "Nicholas Cage as a quarterback" damn that killed me.

[@rplgrime8006]

I'm putting in a formal complaint that the episode isn't called "The Mechanism of the Nuts by Nicholas Cage in the movie The Quarterback".

[@evanmackey2982]

The one timers when they’re imitating something is absolutely the best thing.

[@fadingtoblack1]

“S’too many hats” 😂😂😂

[@harlieannelarsen]

I was uncontrollably crying laughing at “mechanism of the nuts”

[@LouiDali]

Absolutely cried laughing 😂😂

[@bushwickerman]

Class...? Whats happening here?... Class??? ahahahhahaa

[@brianmarquez2819]

Silence😂😂

[@shaeanemusic]

Tears. Streaming. Down. My face. Absolute all time top tier episode

[@tjvuuren8136]

“Mechanism of the nuts” will be a memory that carries me through some rainy days. 😂

[@beet_feet]

I'm pissed that this episode wasn't called Mechanism of the Nut.

[@rosedalegeneral]

Sundays aren't Sundays till i hear "Runk"

[@lasvegascrisis]

a-runkin-men

[@SpaceGhostMars94]

HELLO--HELLO--HELLO--HELLO

[@quickHitter5080]

S’deeper

[@ComplexSkepsisvehementalbeats]

legit

[@joshuahood754]

😂. I always say “RUNK” with the intro.

[@Dmeny]

2 of the best bits of all time "The mechanism of the nuts" & "Nicolas cage as a quarterback"

[@Hammifornia24]

“Quarterback” made me actually hyperventilate 😂😂😂

[@mattdelia]

Haha!!! Yessssss

[@alexdatoss8962]

Rewatched at least 50x ☠️

[@AirDwindler402]

“Quarterback” frunkn killed me😂😂

[@mattdelia]

Lmaooooo

[@Wesley-Insley-Comedy]

Mechanism of the nuts bit killed me and deserves to be in a special

[@c23marie]

This has to be the funniest episode in 2024 😂😂😂 thanks dad! 😂 can we also get a compilation video for 2024 of the funniest moments for lifeline!

[@mattdelia]

Yes pleez

[@scottsmithfilms]

Matt setting up Chris for his bits is top tier entertainment.

[@LucoMcc]

That’s brotherly love 💙

[@mattdelia]

Feelin’ seen rn 🙏🏼🤙🏼🙏🏼

[@scottsmithfilms]

@@mattdelia big up

[@alexdatoss8962]

@mattdelia IS the quarterback 😂

[@kevine8862]

Change. The episode. Title. To. Mechanism of the Nuts. And that’s obvious

[@Handlewithluv]

Also the fact Chris is wearing a number on his back adds to the qtrback comment lmao man I love laughing this hard

[@user-ve5eu2es1d]

correct!

[@jwjitsu]

Chris and Team: Well, the comments, and the channels, and the typing... Matt: * banging head on desk *

[@CompetitiveWitch]

This part had me crying laughing

[@jordanwomack44]

Well with the history of Chris , you know he was panicking inside 😂

[@mattdelia]

LOLOLOL still can’t get over this

[@LouiDali]

Laughed my ass off to the "Nicholas cage in quarterback" part 😂😂

[@katiebeliba]

This episode is a prime example of why you HAVE to WATCH this podcast. You just have to. 👏🏻

[@VanGoHAF]

31:50 the Kanye shirt got Chris looking like he's got no arms, and not small arms as a diss like GONE 😂😂😂

[@davidallen5061]

einstien writing a chalkboard e=mc2 with a speech bubble saying yes got outa that one, is the next t shirt lifeline should make.

[@AngelinaSkye1695]

This episode should have been called "The mechanism of the nuts"😂😂

[@Dehsera]

Solid contender for funniest fucking episode yet

[@megabam35]

this episode made me laugh so hard, and i really needed it. thank you guys!🥰🫶🏽

[@mattdelia]

❤️❤️❤️

[@user-yb6gt5kc4t]

“I’m not gonna lie” is almost always used when the person saying it is about to tell you something they assume is contrary to what they expect you to say/feel about something.

[@4Timesdafunky]

24:39 "What are Gulf of Tonkin about?" 🤣💀🤣💀🤣💀

[@rosten2k]

Chris humming in class had me weak 😂

[@SimonaLisaBuRR]

Chris we support you rocking out to anything when it comes to your boys- we’re proud of how far you’ve come.. actually that you came back and didn’t leave when Shit got hard ❤️

[@GKTorn.]

Matt's hat + Chris' shirt = not enough towels

[@paologis]

I just audibly let out a ahhhyesssss when I opened YT to see a new Lifeline

[@mikejimenez6470]

Me favorite thing about this podcast is reading the title and just guessing what ride we’re going to take as listeners. And also Matt is GQ man of the year. Never had a crush on a man but that’s it. Chris is beef, Matt is lean turkey.

[@mkwilson38]

I’d be all-in with watching y’all on Rumble.

[@CrucifiedPecker]

💯

[@CR_22]

I need that callers phone number so I can leave super long voice memos 😂

[@GKTorn.]

About just absolutely nothing 😂

[@ryanczarnecki33]

Who ever edited this podcast, I see what you did there at 45:38, and I like it.

[@user-ve5eu2es1d]

yeah but sp?

[@SKgoon]

Funny af

[@wojcik1239]

Came here to say that

[@MrChoobsabre]

Finally my Sunday has meaning

[@Downes_Indrome]

Find God and it will always have meaning 😊

[@robertmfdavis878]

The way y’all laughed and did the EXACT same thing after “quarterback” cracked me up.

[@treav]

I fully support the rumble channel 😅

[@BIGDEZUL]

“Quarterback” I almost wrecked😂😂😂

[@noahmiller4953]

I laughed SO damn hard at the story of the dude spilling his drink on himself. Have him on the show. I thought I was the only undercover athlete.

[@footbagQueen92]

Crying at the brotherly banter at the nick cage explanation

[@VladTsverov]

About the elevator shenanigans. Personally i’ve never done that, nor do i think it helps… however.. think about how many times you leave the house having to use the restroom vs coming home to use the restroom. having that elevator open up right away when your coming home could be the deciding factor of whether or not you come home with soiled plants.

[@mrmoore1423]

Not gunna lie, this episode is the bees knees

[@Dmg6um]

Why doesn’t this pod have all the views and follows. “Can I have a word”. I’m dying 😂

[@AmandaHeffelfinger7]

I don’t think I’ve ever laughed as hard as I’ve laughed during another episode. The mechanism of the nuts absolutely killed me 😂

[@NewNoise02]

46:20 Chris is at his best when he just rolls with an insane bit like this. No one makes me laugh harder than he does when he does bits like this

[@abejasasesinasafricanas]

about the elevator question: it's better to send it to the garage floor because most people getting home might be in a rush to get to the bathroom, but if you are levaing your house you probably have time bc you were just there bro, think about it that is the truth and everyone knows that YESgotoutofthatone

[@mrodrez1]

I don't watch the episodes on YT, I just listen when I'm driving but I had to stop by to see the actual visual result of "quarterback..." and it made it even better

[@christopherjones9862]

The Nic Cage in Quarterback / elevator jizz / Health teacher part is some of the funniest shit I've ever seen and heard! The looks I get on public transport thanks to you two! 😂😂😂😂😂

[@brendan7258]

The Quarterback call got me in tears. That's the episode title.

[@144SLRP]

I look forward to Lifeline all week

[@alexissaldana3084]

Great episode, balling because im trying to not laugh while at work and im crying shaking cuz its so stupidly funny 🤣. Last time that happened was the Disagree Police... Yous killing me with these.

[@pjhido5950]

Mechanism of the Nuts is a top five bit. I was howling laughing!!

[@--_V_--]

The mechanism of the nuts bit was amazing.

[@brggz]

One of the best episodes Blows my mind that Chris doesn't know or care if people comment for him. Mechanism of the nuts.

[@Jessicarhv]

lmaaooo actually and absolutely fell out of my chair at "quarterback". THE BEST one

[@An93la.]

Calvin in school already ??😮😢 time is flying and Billy walking ..... soooo cute ... wow thanks for sharing life with us Matt and Chris

[@StevenKaneCo]

Who the frink edits these? At 35:40 Matt literally does something you need to see and the editor cuts to a reaction shot WAY too early. Whatchu doing?!?! BRM. Respect Matt

[@StevenKaneCo]

54:10 !!! Chris does physical comedy and you cut to Matt. Editor, ya playing with us. Do a god damn two shot if you must. Jfc.

[@Downes_Indrome]

Get help...

[@TheGreenGoblinYT]

Hey editor. Walk into the sea.

[@SupergoodStudios]

Shut up, ok

[@jumpboys1408]

​@@SupergoodStudioswas that Chris saying to shut up?? Or one of his underlings??

[@Mind_Splitter]

The slow motion running away and getting stuck to the wall 💀😭

[@Kaylaspersonalchannel]

24:43 Thank you, Matt, for perfectly expressing how some of us feel about thee most vague, convoluted answer to her question 💀❤

[@Blackenedin92]

mechanism of the nuts might be the funniest bit thus far on this podcast. and that's saying a lot. i was scream laughing for 10 minutes

[@brandonhooper37]

Matt cuts his hair with a knife. Rambo style. 😂

[@mattdelia]

LOL

[@patrickhagood5407]

If “The Mechanism of the Nuts” is an example of the Patreon I really need to sign up

[@yansmith9562]

Uhhhh, yah😃

[@tourdefrance]

If he’s sending the elevator down around the time people are returning from work, say 5 PM, then most people are needing to come UP from the garage, and so sending the elevator back down makes sense. Doing it in the morning wouldn’t make much sense. The final answer is: It depends on the time of day, and neither the husband or wife are wrong or right.

[@jayyb1832]

A lot of assumptions, for something that maybe would save someone 15 seconds . But also inconvenience away going down . Making the husband reasoning stupid and impractical

[@jumpboys1408]

​@@jayyb1832no you're the only impractical stupid one because there's a guy in the comment section that broke that shit down to percentages and averages and it makes a lot more sense than your hair brained asshole talking

[@hyperbaroque]

@@tourdefrance Right? You can weigh the correct choice so ma y ways. Perfection suggests sending the elevator to the most-called floor at specific times of day, requiring some record keeping device. Convenience suggests auto-sending the elevator to the 2nd floor after it isn't used for whatever, an hour or so, as that is the floor central to the entire height. (P, 1, 2, 3, 4) But Efficiency suggests not using any more energy than is requested at any time and placing the burden of loss on the user, in the form of having to spend time waiting for the elevator to come from some random place. But here's the cool thing about the last choice: the elevator could be anywhere at any time, and could be requested anywhere at any time. So all of the "odds" of this and that are evened out at the end of the lifetime of the elevator. Think about that one. The only way to beat the Efficient method (let the elevator just sit and rest wherever it was sent,) is to use the Perfectionist method which, again, requires some dynamic record keeping device that can create a schedule of pre-calls based on what typically happens at certain times of day.

[@shanesmith3060]

Bro the mechanism of the nuts clip is easily top 5 lifeline clips ever

[@jwjitsu]

I hate word problems. ChatGPT, however... Given that the apartment complex has four floors plus a basement parking garage, and assuming that each floor has an equal number of residents who use the elevator with equal likelihood, we can calculate the probability that the next rider will be calling the elevator from any given location. Locations: 1. Basement (B) 2. First Floor (1) 3. Second Floor (2) 4. Third Floor (3) 5. Fourth Floor (4) Assumptions: - The number of residents on each floor is equal. - Everyone uses the elevator for both going up and down. - The probability of the next rider calling the elevator from any location is proportional to the number of residents who might be at that location. Probability Calculation: - For any given resident, there's a 50% chance they might be at the parking garage (going up) and a 50% chance they might be on their floor (going down). Thus, if there are equal numbers of residents on each floor: - The probability that the elevator is needed in the parking garage is 1/2, since half of the time, a resident will be going up from the garage. - For any individual floor, the probability that the elevator is needed on that floor is 1/8. This is because there's a 50% chance a resident is on the floor (not in the garage), and for four floors, this results in 1/8 for each floor. Summary of Probabilities: - Parking Garage (B): 1/2 or 50% - First Floor (1): 1/8 or 12.5% - Second Floor (2): 1/8 or 12.5% - Third Floor (3): 1/8 or 12.5% - Fourth Floor (4): 1/8 or 12.5% Thus, sending the elevator back to the parking garage does maximize the odds of it being where the next rider will need it (50% chance), compared to any specific floor (12.5% chance). Husband is right.

[@Downes_Indrome]

I was wondering if my high school math teacher was on YT... now I know!

[@dbcooperslilbrother]

there is however one flaw with this logic, and that is that the people who live on the upper floors (especially the 4th) would now have to wait for the elevator to come up from the basement basically every single time, so the people on the 1st floor would probably quite content with this system and the people on the 4th floor would absolutely hate it. chris and matt are correct, s'doing too much.

[@xDMG15x]

First of all, obviously the husband is right. These two LA sociopaths 👆🏼👆🏼 lack the capacity to be considerate to strangers. Assuming that most residents work a standard work day, there is a more efficient solution if you account for the time of day. Also, residents of Level 1 should be removed from the equation, if they’re waiting for the elevator rather than taking the stairs, they obviously don’t care about saving time.

[@jwjitsu]

@@dbcooperslilbrother Fourth floor residents would only have to wait for it on their way down, though, which only represents 12.5% of the building's rides. It would be in the garage waiting for them the other half of the time, as it would for everyone else. Sooo, husband is looking out for the greater good. Fourth floor residents enjoy the luxury of the best view and no footsteps on their ceiling, they can wait ten seconds for a ride down. Speaking of, did they ever find your brother or his booty?

[@jumpboys1408]

​@@dbcooperslilbrothernah I agree with the math tutor. Send that fucker downstairs. It takes an elevator an extra 10 seconds to travel from the 1st to 4th floor without stops

[@joshtolbert3561]

“What is this, a dream?” 💀 Matt rules

[@mattdelia]

LOLLLLL 🤙🏼

[@Fisherdec]

around 45 mins is one of the greatest podcast moments on the show 😂

[@MatthewM770]

"Quarterback!" had me crying!

[@djeufd834923lkfrkj]

The Nicholas Cage callout mid O destroyed me! 😂

[@Wesley-Insley-Comedy]

The best intro that I don’t skip

[@TheSarahRose131313]

Mad this episode wasn’t called Mechanism of the nuts

[@LucoMcc]

No one has ever grown on me as fast at Mathew. I love the fella 🥹

[@jhall900]

Finally curing my hangover

[@rooster-bh6td]

the nick cage qb bit 🤣

[@e_gad]

47:16 this and the next few minutes are some of the funniest moments ever lmaoooo

[@CompetitiveWitch]

I swore voice notes had a “raise to listen” feature. Basically where you can hold your phone like you’re on a phone call to listen to whatever voice note is sent to you.

[@CompetitiveWitch]

However, I only gotten sent two in my life. 😂 years ago. I could be wrong.

[@thefutureisrobot]

Yep

[@alejandrobrown1499]

If y'all would have played pastor Troy I'd have died 😂

[@autogenes]

This episode should absolutely be called "silence, the mechanism of the nuts"

[@racheller8753]

The reason they're being vague about commenting back is because they don't want their fans to think some rando is responding!!

[@TheFinisher669]

Then say it's them.

[@jvajdos]

It’s definitely because of what everyone knows it’s about and that’s why Matt is ripping them, because everyone knows and they’re making it more weird.

[@brentnuttall3559]

At 47:23 (quarterback comment) I had just taken a big drink of water and I spewed that shit all over my car bc that comment was HILARIOUS and perfectly timed..

[@trentwomack5293]

That whole part with the shinning c*m bit 😂

[@trentwomack5293]

Oh God 😂 my cheeks hurt after that one. Gayest thing I could write. As Matt would say.

[@Xpzilla]

Annoyed workplace woman was hilarious

[@MillieBillie-zv5eb]

how is this episode not called "mechanism of the nuts"

[@TylerG69]

“Quarterback” 😂

[@Downes_Indrome]

Thank you very mjch Matt and Chris and everyone. Another great episode. Much love to you all and your fams. That goes for anyone reading comments as well ❤️

[@kyleturner3779]

So with the elevator thing, in taller buildings there’s logic in the systems to kind of divide where the elevators are and which takes what call. For something like a small apartment complex it is probably best to just leave it where it is. In an office building sometimes they make the cars all recall to the first floor because most people when they reach their destination don’t use the elevator until they leave for the day. S’deeper for me 😂

[@gigi0066]

I would love to see you guys with Bad Friends, giving advices and just messing around. Great episode. I thought when you both went down laughing, that Matt was going to come up wearing another hat.

[@ohthatmollie]

this episode is in the top 5 best ever. ❣️

[@adri_rck]

😂 oh my god. The Hats Parade. Best one so far with that blue one 🤠

[@blondezilla87]

One of the funniest episodes 😁 ty

[@thecorrectoification]

So, you guys are wrong about the can of smashed A-holes. It's not that it would look like nothing, you're thinking about it the complete wrong way. It would look like a can of ground up thrombosed hemorrhoid flaps and wrinkly discolored brownish hairy meat tissue. It would look like something from the end of the 1988 Brian Yuzna film "Society."

[@mattdelia]

Interesting point!!! Also, good on you for knowing and referencing ‘Society’. Great film.

[@JoeMofKZoo]

The real brother moment… Yes!

[@WallStreetKing]

Got tickets to Thunder Bay Show 😎🔥🔥🔥

[@realtyrocker]

Chris' level of genius or IQ to be able to improv the things he does

[@user-ve5eu2es1d]

I mean HAD to come watch the end after listening to the pod!

[@diannawilliams6923]

Very funny Matt! You say, “I’m ugly”, but you don’t really believe it because you spend so much time with fashion.

[@erinpicard7403]

The lady who has the guy at work who drives her crazy. The only thing that would make this better is if her and her husband both work from home😂

[@nics8969]

Rewatched mechanisms of the nuts 2 times cryingggggggggggg

[@leifer5604]

How was this episode not called “the mechanism of the nuts”

[@donnychastain81]

Dang laughing so hard hahahahahahahha mechanism of the nutts. Hahahahahahahahaha 😂