🤔 The BIGGEST Lesson I've Learned as a Blender YouTuber

[@CurtisHolt]

To condense this: the desire to create is cancelled by the fear of bad performance, causing a mental block that prevents work from being done (the dysfunction), even if that work completely transcends the platform (like a tool or resource separate from KZbin). Instead, we comfortably settle into far less significant but more comfortably-performing work (like formulaic content), reducing the value of our contribution to a community (by extension, our legacy). This is me reporting *my* experience, of which many people will have different opinions (as our brains don't work in the same way). But different opinions do not devalue or re-write my experience. If this video resonates with a few other creators, then its purpose has been fulfilled.

[@NICK....]

to further condense: capitalism is the death of art

[@Pixel_Pulse_3D]

I love that you talk not just about 3D and art but also about the artist and the psychology behind it all. Its very rare to find videos like these so I find great value in it. I will save this one for later rewatch to do some digging and reflecting on my own as well. Cheers Curtis!

[@KevBinge]

YES. There are so many relevant points in this video I can’t address them all. Executive disfunction, algo-led conditioning, disfunctional upbringings, anxiety, caffeine, etc…. I’d used to love teaching on KZbin, now I would rather just do it on Patreon and not have to deal with the YT bs. Sharing over 2 decades of production experience and seeing those videos bomb isn’t worth my time. I even took 8 months off of YT to clear the toxicity and bury my head in real-life production. I’m back now but with AI crap (including Blender videos, sadly,) flooding the platform, who knows if this will last lol. Rock the nails, screw the emotionally stunted haters. 🤘😁🤘

[@munkmade]

Only a few minutes in but your doing a great job describing a struggle many of us have! Finding value in making things that are just for the art and so on. Keeping that original passion

[@BenLevin]

I always get a lot out of your videos and appreciate your wisdom, compassion, and artistry! 🦄

[@Sah.4D]

Hey CURTIS. You are right about everything. I started doing youtube content in January of 2023 with the purpose of sharing art and how to overcome struggles as an artist. Those videos don't do well and i started doing the "10 best addons" videos and a lot of people watched that and i've been chasing that for a while (maybe because i'm chasing monetization) and not doing any art or learning anything new because i feel people aren't going to watch them. I don't feel excited anymore toward 3D because i think when i share on any platform. The metrics are low! I have to take a step back and do what i want and start new project and learn new things (i'm on my way Pierrick Alive course!!!) Thank YOU for this video

[@WCCOMPUTERGRAPHICS]

Man, that is one of the most interesting videos I have seen recently. I also have a channel on youtube and ended up in the same dilema, going to the same conclusion and discovering similar solution. Thanks to share.

[@SpencerMagnusson]

I like the idea of subscribing to topics or playlists within subscribers. I wish playlists had a way to notify you when they're changed/added to. That would easily solve that. It would limit the need for multiple channels for creators: the "Theory" channels could all be in one channel with different topics, theoretically (pun intended). I know even Markiplier talked about the idea of KZbinr "curators", where they can be monetized for curating playlists without having to compile others' videos into their own.

[@KevinMerinoCreations]

🦄I come to your channel as I enjoy and share many of your thoughts about your variety of interests. I do feel like your authentic self comes through in all your content. I think your approach of creating a filter for the feedback is a good one. You value it, though you want to be in the proper state or modality when you analyze it. 👏👏👏

[@Markom3D]

Oh man, so jealous of the new space lol

[@Markom3D]

28.... such a baby lol I am 40 in two months

[@Markom3D]

🦄

[@nrdkraft]

Curtis I appreciate you talking about executive distinction, because I recently began to understand that that is what I am struggling with, and I’m wanting to START my KZbin channel with the hopes of if become at least a part of my career in the future, but so far I’ve just had a lot of false starts, which granted has accumulated almost a thousand subs anyway. But I’m still leaning how to navigate my executive dysfunction so that I can have a more stable and satisfying life and support others as well as myself. So hearing your perspective and your journey thus far is very valuable. Thank you Curtis🦄

[@JoacimSvedlund]

🦄 I appriciate all the thought that goes into this and how you share it with vulnerability. Also, love the blocking of hate by doing what's you right in their face 😜(nails). I'm here for all you content as long as you keep sharing your thoughts and struggles.

[@Just3DThings]

Loved this video! Artist and Reporter concept and show don’t tell these are the ones I am taking away from this video 💅🦄

[@ericpatrick2779]

🦄 I think you just hit the nail on the head on the cause of most people's executive dysfunction with various types of creative works. It's awesome that you are seeing success with all the effort you've put into retraining yourself into a healthier work lifestyle. I've taken your advice in a previous video of dividing up my never-ending projects into a number of pools, and that has helped me avoid burnout by switching gears without feeling despair over a lack of forward momentum. Perhaps there's something here, too, that I might be able to make use of for retraining myself. Thanks for putting this one out!

[@Thingsbydesign]

KZbin certainly has some problems. Part of the problem is there is insane amount videos uploaded every day, its hard to pick the good videos to show to everyone. In my ideal KZbin subscribers would matter. There would be space to always show subscribed channel videos and new videos. You should be even able to select "I will watch this later" or this video is not for me, but I still want to see when this creator makes a new video. Now subscribers are just a number with any meaning. Currently it serves more to viewers than to creator which is pretty sad in my opinion...I would want to see more videos from my favorite creators but it doesn't work like that.

[@baddkatt9504]

I love your nails ❤ and your content... Thx for this vid, I'm sure it will help a lot of people...🦄

[@SaintVincient]

🦄Your thought process is impeccable. As an artist who struggles with having to been taught to critique myself based on what other people thought, I've been dealing with this sort of thing long before social media, KZbin, or algorithms took over the world. I really like the idea of letting oneself take in criticism, but as a different entity. I think more artists should probably endeavor to recapture the childish and innocent form of creativity where we just make something and work with the process instead of letting the critical voices--internal and external--dictate our worth. I appreciate that you regularly get me thinking.

[@oppixargent]

Good points there... idem! I call it Fast Food content, the one that you need the algorhythms to pick for starts. Then, the disconnecting one, that is the one you do out of your regular topic (cause eating pizza all days ain't healthy and gets one tired; pity social media platforms in grl doesn't like that too much). And last, the content that you know has community value, and you wish doesn't get lost in algorythms.

[@Aptass]

Great stuff Curtis, I'm so tired of getting served algoritmic content on all platforms these days. And as a content creator it must be super frustrating not being able to reach through. Being old and wise I've learned you should be creative for the sake of being creative. Do stuff and learn new things. Evolve, repeat. Trying to please everyone doesn't make any interesting content. Aim to have fun and enjoy whatever you do. The right crowd will find it and enjoy the content keep doing what you do already! 💯🦄

[@ethdavis]

Great video and insights Curtis. Cheers!

[@etherlonX]

🦄 Dude! I watch these particular vids to the end for the philosophy you talk about (very relatable). The Blender stuff is a bonus.

[@keremyokuva5185]

I guess you can do anything you want. And glad to see you ok.

[@LonnonFoster]

🦄To the Reporter: just play more Curtis. To the Artist: just be more Curtis!

[@ChristopherSchiller]

🦄 and as for comment, I'm always impressed with the thought that goes into every video you share, regardless of the content or intention. It's that consistent value that I find most rewarding while watching. Thanks for that.

[@DonChups]

I'm in a small blender discord server and everyone is oh so worried about their numbers. Linked your video there. Thanks for expressing in words much better than I can. 🦄

[@mind_of_a_darkhorse]

As always you do an amazing job! 🦄

[@bouncycow3010]

Fantastic video, there's a lot I really took from this little video. Really like that idea of separating the artist and the reporter to make sure you keep creating what's important to you. 🦄 edit: actually there's another thing I'd like to add. I think the same sort of mentality should be used when thinking about artist improvement as well. The idea that you certainly "improve" at making things in the sense of making your ideas clearer, or more presentable, but we shouldn't try to change what's at the heart of our creations, they should come first, and what we learn just compliments them, not the other way around.

[@ravendaee]

🦄HI Curtis, I watch both of your content btw. Really happy for you for the new work space 😊

[@CurtisHolt]

Thank you! I appreciate it 😊💖

[@WaterShowsProd]

The KZbin feedback you describe is a product of corporate feedback, and is what psycholgy would refer to as "negative feedback", and it's exactly what's thrown Hollywood off the rails. Also, your map of the KZbinr trap displays the things that have caused me to lose interest in some channels that used to be enjoyable. Well, as they used to say on ship galleys, if the boat is going fast enough, whip the rowers harder. That's how this system is designed to operate. A workhouse analogy would work well here as well. Perhaps an updated version of Oliver Twist could come out of this. 🦄

[@vinay0arts]

The lesson on 2:32 is just reading the minds and No BS, How creatives work and what they experience Great video as always

[@AroundTheHouseShow]

🦄Been doing some low key talking and shooting myself, trying to orient to letting go and just talking through process. Good to hear your thoughts on that and see the experimentation.

[@andysellers8298]

Interesting topic. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. 👍

[@AzazeoAinamart]

Disrupt the algorithm! 🦄

[@kjelm]

🦄Hello Curtis. What you say is very revealing of our modern world touching the world of artists. Many films are created with the aim of making a profit. We seek to please as many people as possible, which lowers the level of creativity. This is also true for the novel. Standards are required and publishers make a modification that destroys the work. As soon as the platform becomes paid as in the case of KZbin, degradation begins. Thank you for this comment explained intelligently, as always. Above all, don't change.

[@infotoons212]

Sorry don't do unicorns but I did make it that far. 😁Good stuff!

[@susanyoung6579]

Thank you so much for creating this video. Solid gold content. I always love your philosophical thoughts. unicorn emoji

[@kelthekonqrr]

🦄 Been a while

[@openroomxyz]

Thanks for creating this video you are awsome keep creating and yea I agree with you🦄

[@nrdkraft]

Also forgot to add I’m a ‘96 kid too haha🦄

[@MichaelBridges3D]

Great video - I do love how you articulate your thoughts. A lot of what you say resonates 🐴+ 🍦

[@YakOfArt]

You are a beautiful 🦄

[@davidpringuer3553]

You are describing burnout

[@CurtisHolt]

Not quite. The very first video I made reference to is one of my previous videos called ‘avoiding creative burnout (for some people)’. But here specifically I’m talking about the desire to create being present (unlike burnout), but a cognitive block caused by the fear of performance preventing that from happening. That’s dysfunction. If it was burnout alone, the desire to create would not be present.

[@planefusionart]

Dang. Seems like you're being way to hard on yourself and over analyzing things. Though, I get the putting hard work in, and not seeing results making it feel pointless. Seems like you've definitely taken on the reporter role the past couple or so years. I discovered your channel when you dived deep into the nebula creation with blender. I loved the videos you made like that.

[@3dParadox]

My mom has a horse training channel and she is obssessed with views, everything is for views, a video is bad if it doesnt have alot of views. Her past eight videos and exactly eight (shes counting) have all performed "bad" and she is constantly asking herself what she is doing wrong. While the content is about training horses and not creating artwork, the video making in itself can be considered an artform at least in my book. Her artist is pretty much a slave to generating views. This has been going on for 2 years. Its disheartening and i feel anything that comes from me has no impact. I feel it needs to run its course and in the end she will quit youtube or if she keeps going she will have found a better way like you have. Although im so very far from be being a youtube creator this video still may help me break a mindset before it starts. My two monstrosity of videos in the eyes of my reporter on this channel was just me trying to familiarize myself with the video making process a bit. Also it was fun which means my artist is in good health. 🦄

[@davidspiers6638]

great message, but the jump cuts are a little jarring for me. 🦄

[@CurtisHolt]

Sadly the jump cuts are a side effect of improv discussions, but I find that if I plan exactly what I want to say beforehand then I overthink it and never start recording, so it's a bit of a tradeoff.

[@21st44]

I 've an Idea

[@byAndreasEkberg]

🦄🌽

[@grahamhurst6212]

🦄be you but also pays the bills, welcome to the capitalist world of nonsense

[@AnthonyRosbottom]

🦄Great video. On my own channel I struggle with the concept of just posting my artwork and art process without narration. The dopamine hound in me wants the view numbers that a properly narrated tutorial video would get me but the artist in me doesn't want to plan out a script / talking points, do the extra editing etc. The artist is winning over the dopamine hound.... so far... click here to see if the dopamine hound can fight back!!!!!! >>>>> 😁

[@halafradrimx]

Viewership maximization is killing content on this platform. I am tired of this post 2018 format we have today on KZbin.

[@HaydenHatTrick]

First

[@CurtisHolt]

👋👋

[@HaydenHatTrick]

🦄

[@PavelSusin]

Love the analogy of being two entities and I'm going to try it myself.🦄 I feel this could be a good way for you to create healthy boundaries against your inner critic.

[@ROBOTRIX_eu]

..🦄 ..i prefer no painted nails, i admit !