the ending of every 7 hour video essay

the long awaited sequel
Twitter: / mancarrying
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[@cherriegetison6093]

Don't these videos usually end with a 30-minute segment of a sleep-deprived KZbinr thanking their patrons and talking about all the traumatic experiences that happened in the past 6 months?

[@YaamFel]

Ah, a fellow Quinton Reviews enjoyer

[@nuxmitikuna7718]

Omg you just described every essay video I've seen and didn't even realized

[@jonesjermaine4387]

Annabelle Lane or Bailey Jay sexiest woman of 2022 change my mind

[@Lexivor]

@@YaamFel I honestly can't wait for Quinton's next 7 hour video.

[@siukong]

That's if you're lucky. Often they _start_ with that segment.

[@lauchlanbagley1934]

"Ooh hey a new hbomb video about the funny Roblox sound!" 2 hours and several counts of fraud later:

[@ManCarryingThing]

that video was amazing

[@niharsheth]

Tommy's mother is very proud.

[@linkofvev]

@@niharsheth Tommy's mother? Is that a game Tommy worked on?

[@Vellzi]

@@niharsheth Everyone should have a fountain in their bedroom!

[@eclipserepeater2466]

"Thank you for watching this 30 minute video and accompanying feature-length meltdown."

[@anthonyrosenthal3674]

I personally like it when they end with “so at the end of the day…is he a good person? It’s hard to say, and there aren’t really any clear answers.”

[@KasumiRINA]

I just watched a long Essay on Noam Chomsky, and it was mostly summarizing Bosnian war... I will be sick for the next few years after that... At least there weren't any questions about the guy's moral integrity, people in comments pointed out more genocides he supported. Then there was a video on "realists" by same guy, Kraut, and I decided that I had enough of watching things done to us now done to other people before for this decade.

[@Xeyal1001]

Soooo TRO hahaha

[@cara-setun]

And you end the vid wondering “then why did you even make this if you’re not gonna say anything definitive?”

[@secretname2670]

Yes i hate this, It's just like reading what AI wrote, no opinions to debate

[@drowsyvt]

It's even better when the title of the video is like "WHY (INSERT RANDOM FAMOUS POLITICIAN, CELEBRITY, WHATEVER) IS EVIL" or something like that.

[@Diwalia]

I, too, listened to a man go from talking about a Roblox sound effect to exposing a company for investor fraud over the course of 2 hours.

[@SheepUndefined]

Not just exposing investor fraud, but possibly having taken down a falsified world record in the process!

[@MrSamwise25]

This was made in direct response to hbomberguy's video, wasn't it

[@0y1on]

What video?

[@SuperNuclearUnicorn]

Could have also been about Defunctland's vid that went from "what's the deal with the Disney jingle?" to a touching tribute to a man's legacy

[@Syncopiia]

@@0y1on It's the most recent Hbomberguy video.

[@ElPanadero18]

I can’t imagine how many 7 hour video essays you watched to research for this.

[@mgg9416]

Don't worry, he just had to watch the endings.

[@jacobd1984]

I bet he watched 7 of them.

[@ginge641]

Idk man, I've never seen anything like this.

[@kelvinkarter9757]

Fucking genius

[@qwopiretyu]

I can't watch how many 7 hour video essays you imagined to research for this.

[@dusty2366]

Can't believe Tommy Tallarico lied about being on Jimmy Fallon

[@maxlap7855]

Well played.

[@drewsauveterre8867]

He holds the Guinness World Record for most Jimmy Fallon appearances. (His mother is so proud.)

[@20electric]

He posted a picture of himself shaking hands with Jimmy Fallon, what's really funny is Jimmy did the EXACT same pose they used in his Madame Tussauds statue, very funny guy.

[@cartilagehead6326]

I can’t believe that boy ate that whole pizza

[@paulmiller7374]

His mother's very proud

[@fireknight4151]

My favorite part is that the image used for the "Italian Mafia" is just a pizza

[@shytendeakatamanoir9740]

It started with Jimmy Fallon talking about the disgusting pizza he ate after all.

[@vasyan123]

Forgetaboutit!

[@leonmayne797]

Goodfellas.

[@MenchieExtrakt]

Aww man now im hungry

[@amberhernandez]

I COOKA DA PIZZA

[@ijpg-fd7qn]

Don't forget the half hour pateron scroll over a monologue about how this video has caused them to overwork into an 80hr work week for 3 months straight

[@Briskeeeen]

And then they disappear for 9-22 months while they do it again, all the while not doing another job to support them.

[@HelenHunt69]

Better than plagarizing other people's work and passing it off as your own to fit more sponsorship deals into each week. Quality usually takes time.

[@drewwhitney7327]

Audience: too bad it wasn’t worth it.

[@8thlvlMage]

The video also has about 20 edits, all of which are simple cuts.

[@maxbrownrigg6859]

Just make a video essay we all know you want to

[@ManCarryingThing]

i did

[@Vulkuvier]

@@ManCarryingThing i watched it at like 2am when i had class the next day

[@Raisinininin]

@@Vulkuvier procrastinating, as you should

[@bob1789]

@@ManCarryingThing Make more you coward

[@Satellaview1889]

He is making it, he's just slowly uploading it over the course of a number of small videos.

[@maximiliancordedda1492]

this sure as hell says a lot about the ending of every 7 hour essay

[@QueenDodogondo]

this sure as hell says a lot about the ending of "the ending of every 7 hour essay"

[@psibarpsi]

@@QueenDodogondo This sure as hell says a lot about what says a lot about 'the ending of every 7 hour essay'.

[@revolverjesus98]

7 hours is long, but have you ever seen a 21 hour video recapping a story? (that's not even finished)

[@rosefulmadness]

​@Dhar_C yes, I've seen a 24h one actually... it was summer

[@Villajumpy]

Absolutely! At least 18 seconds worth!

[@antekpatyk9425]

I can't wait when this channel has more videos about video essays than books. And then in the final evolution it becomes about regular essays, with detailed 20 second analysis, released weekly.

[@shytendeakatamanoir9740]

And 7 hours parody movies in-between.

[@wotfanedit]

And a book release about the essay videos.

[@DashingSteel]

Actually, all 3-7 hour essays I've watched usually end like "Well, I guess that's it. Boy that sure was long huh? Fuggin' like and subscribe I guess" [visibly relieved that they finished this absolute beast of a project and clearly don't have the energy for better final words]

[@Bala_Niranna]

read that in quinton reviews voice exactly

[@Psychodelicphil]

I can’t believe I watched a 7 hour essay about why Jimmy Fallon actually has an anti-capitalist message just for it to end like this. He didn’t even start with early cinema SMHMH

[@Nilmand]

I especially like the part where he demonstrates that James Corden's Carpool Karaoke has anarcho-communist underlying messages

[@rae-everything]

Jimmy Fallon is actually a wholesome capitalist king.

[@phoenixRose1724]

jimmy fallon is proof capitalism isn't a meritocracy because he's so unfunny

[@Bruh-zx2mc]

"The government have begun altering their records..." 3 seconds later "This video analysis started as analysis of Jimmy Fallon"

[@cavemann_]

"Look, I was only going to find out whO mAdE the OOF sOunD EffECt. GIVE ME A BREAK!"

[@cavemann_]

Oh I see that's the joke huh, anyway hbomb is based

[@krombopulos_michael]

I actually have the Guinness World Record for the longest video essay. My mother is very proud.

[@insertsomememereferenceher8483]

Hi mauler

[@fatherdog346]

This channel doesn't have any content

[@raxdrive]

This channel doesn't have any content

[@holyfrackledang]

This content doesn’t have any channel

[@julianobarbisan4193]

"Yeah, i've gotten the guinness record for longest video essay a couple times, my mother is very proud"

[@thatboisamu_l425]

can’t forget the part at the end where they play the emotional music, their voice gets a lot quieter, and they tie the whole video into how life is a beautiful thing

[@MineralTown]

saw one that did that and they harkened back to when they were a kid and their dad was still alive with seemingly no connection to subject matter. i have no idea what the video was about but it was either a cartoon or a video game naturally

[@deadmatt666]

having just finished the hbomberguy's video essay minutes before this video came out, this literally feels like a 20 sec summary of the entire video xD

[@greenefieldmann3014]

It's a year later and same.

[@atocanboi409]

glad i'm not the only one who's already binged through the 2-hour long descent into madness about a funny sound effect when it's been out for 2 days

[@Pathoslogical]

Don’t forget the half hour intro about who Jimmy Fallon is, what late night tv shows are, whether you like late night tv shows, the history of all late night tv, and then the history of TV itself for good measure

[@TheTrueRandomGamer]

Long Man Carrying Thing.

[@shan4680]

I understood that reference!

[@Drdarktouch2]

(7 hours into an average efap) Fringo: "insert Simpsons reference" Moobler: "is a man not worth his bungalow" -bigedius Ragsi's:(Joe Brandon moment) Mootle: the racetisms

[@owainglyndwrlastprinceofwa2486]

I also understood that reference

[@hammerbeam]

Man carrying thing is just going to have to release a seven hour long video to give us the full experience

[@adriancarrillo9918]

They usually end up saying, “but just take it with a grain of salt,” as they spent hours talking about the thing

[@happytoaster5682]

I love long KZbin videos. It makes me feel like I'm part of investigative journalism with the KZbin editing style and sense of humor while I'm actually just all cozy in bed

[@rafaelc2029]

The abrupt ending after tasking meticulous care to nail the timing of everything else in the vid is the most accurate part.

[@AvengingEnder]

I like how him making this parody implies he has actually watched enough 7 hour video essays to consider this as an accurate parody of them.

[@jamieclarke42]

It's just part of the aesthetic of them. If it doesn't end like this, my 7 hours have been wasted, frankly.

[@sossboyRyan]

my favorite will always be *"And as always, thanks for watching." (Vsauce music kicks in)*

[@MasterEth]

Pyrocynical and Hbomberguy are SHAKING rn

[@qstionblomens6138]

But Quinton Reviews is unaffected

[@MasterEth]

@@qstionblomens6138 I forgot about him lol

[@MariktheGunslinger]

@@qstionblomens6138 literally who

[@rinnest]

Jay Exci shaking while holding his Doctor Who essay

[@amberhernandez]

​@@rinnestAbsolute _queen_ for making me sit through an entire five-hour video on a series I deliberately avoided for the longest time lmao

[@reallycool]

hey hbomberguy this guy stole my video, get him

[@luci2k153]

truly, one of the most life-changing, thought provoking video essays i have ever seen, the part where you blew into a kazoo for 45 uncut minutes as an illustration of the evolution of language since the early mesolithic era was truly inspiring, which is why i will be recording a 14 hour breakdown analysis of your 7 hour video essay. thank you, man carrying thing.

[@shytendeakatamanoir9740]

OK. Finally watched your breakdown of this video and... I have thoughts. So much in fact I made a 21 hours video about it. There's also gonna be a future 7 part serie about that pasta anecdote you made at 11:36:27, because it led me to a rabbit hole that will probably ends up changing our conception of reality as we know it.

[@Luna-Fox]

When people approach video essays like they do high school level papers

[@mrtoast244]

I love these long essays because it feels like you're going on a whole journey of discovery with the creator. The rabbitholes are too fun

[@hannahw2863]

I once watched a like 2 hr video about the history of homestuck by Sarah Z that was then followed up with another 1.5 hr long video talking about the all the weird ass legal action homestuck tried to take against her for her video

[@tomtommerson6320]

Your passive aggression towards video essays gives me the impression of what the Sith mean by "let the hate flow through you" I like it

[@Taikamuna]

I would love to see the full 7 hour version

[@Epsilonsama]

My favorite video essays are about some young kid born in the late 90s and early 2000s talking about how some mid game is actually good because they had that game for Xmas in 2006. *Goes back at playing a totally awesome underappreciated gem that Santa gave me in 1994 as an Xmas present*

[@U_N_Owen]

I blame Kevin Perjurer for being too good at his job. Every time Defunctland posts a video, it creates this huge demand for impossibly good feature-length video essays that nobody can fill at KZbin prices.

[@OrionCenturion]

Need more than 7 hours for a Jimmy Fallon analysis

[@shytendeakatamanoir9740]

It's part of a trilogy about Jimmy Fallon with multiple spinoffs

[@bluedemontr-whisperofwind-2296]

oh hey it happened again

[@MiX0195]

Hbombomberguy moment

[@sebastianfors4491]

Yes, but I’m too fat and slimy to look into it fully so I’ll just pretend all of this is true and tell my friends I read a peer-reviewed study about it.

[@its_elkku135]

I feel so exposed

[@MrCreeepe]

forsen

[@WanhanAjanMansikka]

I retained the same amount of information as if I had watched the actual 7 hour video essay

[@koboldcatgirl]

The most important thing is for it to end with, "So what should we do about it? ... idk!! but it's pretty neat/fucked up!"

[@jestagoon8408]

Wow! Absolutely blown away by the My Little Pony lore breakdown on this one!

[@nono-xm8yl]

I think that, typically, if the length of a video essay exceeds the time it takes to consume the work it's based on, then it's not worth watching. Most of that time will likely be spent on redundant points, tangent subjects and comedy. A notable exception, I feel, is YMS' review of the 2019 Lion King remake. It's more than a review of the film. It's a well-researched deep dive into the production, marketing, and reception of the film that manages to be funny while remaining focused.

[@Epsilonsama]

I think 45 minutes to 80 minutes is as long as a video essay should be. At that point you need to cut down the video and try to summarize the information better. Unless you are making a video series on something where you can go on more specifics but asking people hours of their time is presumptuous unless is some free form conversation or a podcast.

[@user-yo7hz8gw4t]

That is a poor metric. For example, by that standard, if you wanted to discuss a specific line from a movie or book you would only be allowed the time it takes to say it, which makes any meaningful commentary impossible. It almost always should take longer to talk about the thing than the thing itself if you want it to not be shallow, so my criteria tend to be the reverse of yours.

[@Crystal_Dylan]

Wasn’t quite 7 hours but this coming out right after Hbomberguy’s last video is certainly something

[@tomas.bednar]

Usualy your skits feel much longer than they are, but this 7-hour one felt much shorter, I guess time flies when person is entertained

[@isaiahhogen8270]

I remember a time when KZbinrs would split a 20 min vid into two parts because analytics told them viewers didn't like long videos. Now anything under 30 mins is considered a short video and people demand hour long videos every month so they can have something on in the background to focus on their homework. Not that all of this is bad, its just strange/funny how much KZbin has changed

[@jmeMK64]

So that's why Spongebob is a really good show

[@thomasedison3700]

I feel called out because these are exactly the type of videos I watch

[@VanDvorak]

I always stop watching theses video essays after 4 or 5 hours!! So thank you for showing us how it ends EVERYTIME

[@lexuamzaled5515]

This is precisely why I love Sarah Z's videos, they tell so much and still they wrap up so well it's perfect

[@DjIceCnS]

god i love your videos

[@monkeyheist]

I’m gonna watch this for 7 hours until it makes sense.

[@mksketchms]

The hello fresh ads in the middle of a true crime murder story are very important

[@joeyxcx]

Thank you so much this saved me from watching a 7 hour video essay now that I know how it ends

[@tmac326]

This ending of every 7 hour video essay really is an ending of all time!

[@IntelligenceCorn]

In my experience, video essays end with Chopin's Nocturne op.9 No.2 in order for the essayist to lend an emotional impact that is not supported by the writing, delivery or subject matter of the essay.

[@rayesafan9628]

How can These videos about video essays be so true, but make me want to watch video essays more?

[@projekttaku1]

I love when multi hour long video's cater towards my shortening time span.

[@aidanmallon9879]

This aged somewhat well

[@monkasteele6050]

I always get looped into these video essays they will literally tell me a dog shit movie from my childhood is actually a cinematic masterpiece followed by a several hour long crash course into film history and overanalyzes of characters and the meaning of the movie.

[@just1it1moko]

I hate when they hit you with that "ofcourse this is all speculation and you need to think to yourself if this is true or not" at the end of those long videos.

[@regularsama412]

The only excuse long essays have to even exist is the fact you can listen to them while doing chores. I don't think anyone sane unironically sits down to *watch* them

[@Hedgpig]

Imagine a 7 hour video essay made and narrated by Jimmy Fallon

[@Awesome2000WasTaken]

I loved the part where he said something about the moment where they go back in time to the first Thanksgiving to get Turkeys off the menu.

[@williamkesner781]

I’ve never seen any of your other videos. Instant subscribe. 🎉

[@venlamiila]

Seeing this recommended to me right as I was about to watch another 4 hours long video essay feels like a desperate attempt of a wake-up call destined to go ignored against my better judgement

[@noooiisloth]

hbomberguy... is that you?!?!?

[@ZofiaQ]

Jimmy Fallon is an international threat

[@vi18379]

i need recommendations for video essays like this i love them

[@soabac0835]

and yet we're all here for it. watching video essays til death

[@christianmilnamow6360]

These essays are always about someone who HATES something. Why can't we have an extensive essay about something people LOVE?

[@felipeopazo8375]

I've seen many of those

[@LiamAnthony_]

And then the patreon read

[@mrhater2284]

This is why very long video essays are my favorite. Especially if they delve into abstract concepts in philosophy

[@archive4389]

“while this video started as…” perfect💀

[@caradine898]

I really appreciate that the roblox oof video is recommended below this

[@shanepigg1629]

Me just browsing through KZbin happy 😃 KZbin : here’s a 5 hour video essay shitting on a game/show/movie you like Me:😮😢😢😢

[@Kabutoes]

Very nice you pick up patterns/stereotypes on things I never thought of

[@indoor_vaping]

You nailed it with the cease and desist letters

[@Manuel-gk3rv]

And thanks again to Iranian Government Inc. for sponsoring this video! I wouldn't be able to do what I love without your support

[@alexleach4488]

Roblox oof sound video 😭

[@ZomboidMania]

I used 2 bass bosting apps at the same time for the ending seconds there and it was absolutly hallarious 🤣🤣

[@JaleelBeig]

Scrolling through recommendations, i saw this video & the thumbnail was immediately demanding me "Mission Report december 16 1991"

[@n1ppe]

I agree

[@purplerain6260]

Can we just appreciate the amount of effort he put into that 7 hour video essay about jimmy fallon🙏

[@vloqy]

I've only ever watched one 7 hour vid but it was pretty good

[@mateuszmateuszowy]

I like when it ends with a montage so long, everyone skips it

[@SudoProxy]

Not to knock 2 hour essays but if it comprises mostly of mental gymnastics you can reach any conclusion you want.

[@YourCapybaraAmigo_17yrsago]

✔️☑️ Life changing ☑️✔️ Enlightening ✔️☑️ Informative Thanks, KZbin!

[@Drekromancer]

Thank you for making this. I feel so seen.

[@sammyuel7329]

I’m so glad I watched this 7 hour essay if not I wouldn’t have been able to see the ending

[@willehster9467]

the genius part of this is no one can criticize this take because no one else has actually made it to the end of one of those videos

[@p.e.miranda2038]

About that

[@DunSolVa]

ahaha yeahhhhhhhh............

[@Pacavi]

the play next video was hbomb's latest video 💀

[@carljones9640]

I have never watched a 7 hour video essay, so I'll take your word for it.

[@frankalonso5899]

You forgot the part where Tim Rogers says “And now it’s time for THE BOTTOM LINE”

[@justinreece8195]

Lmao this vid gets recommended to me the day Jimmy Fallon is getting cancelled

[@mafiousbj]

I love when videos ask a simple "yes or no" question in the title and proceed to make a 2 hour essay explaining the reasoning before giving the answer. If you only care for the answer because it picked your curiosity you are better of skipping till the end ^^

[@jatsko3113]

if you only care for the answer you're better off typing the question into a search engine

[@JacF6734]

“And I base that on absolutely nothing.”

[@Mark.Taylor.]

Love the pause after "and I don't like him"