The Expectation Trap vs Cycle For Success

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

How to Calm Down a Temper Tantrum - kzbin.info/www/bejne/h2jbpZeHZc6emsU

[@maryperrysmith5815]

This was amazing.

[@maryannekendall3344]

Nicholeen, I would hug you if I were listening to this in person. All I keep saying to myself as you are speaking and articulating is "Of course! This is exactly what is happening! How did I not articulate this myself? " You clearly have done a lot of personal work and research. Thank yo so much for this!

[@jenniferrush8231]

I just want to say thank you for making this video. I can not tell you how accurately you just described my life… I have struggled so much to put it into words and change… I’ve felt like I’ve been drowning everyday… I need this mental shift in perspective and the strategies you are teaching. I hope great change will be happening in my life and in my family’s. Thank you, seriously so much. Please keep making videos.

[@mdbarnes21]

Parenting is hard work, but worth it! Praying for everyone working to implement self-government in their families and I appreciate prayers for ours as well!

[@nancypanasyuk8860]

All praise and glory be to God for my search question leading me to your videos and channel. Thank you for all that you’re offering. May God bless your work, your family, and your life. I’m eager to listen to more of your content🙏🏼♥️

[@roxyperson8328]

You’re stepping on my toes but I needed it! I just realized that when I get frustrated or depressed about not meeting a goal or expectation it reveals that my motivation was pride and selfishness. Ouch.😣

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I'm glad you were able to self-analyze and be inspired! It can be rough hearing that you need to change, but it's part of life and it's how (and why) we move forward in life. Thanks for sharing your "ah-hah!" moment with me!

[@reganbarnes6424]

Wow, I feel like you’ve been watching me! I absolutely go off track when my expectations don’t come about. 😬

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You're not alone. This is a really common trap for people to fall into. It's so easy to set ourselves up for failure if we don't prepare properly.

[@hollerusc]

Thank you for these videos. With 5 kids- 3 of them teenagers- all of a sudden parenting got real. It is so hard to relinquish control and responsibility to your teens, and the power struggle is constant (along with selfish attitudes) in our house. One bad attitude or misbehavior spreads like wildfire, especially when it comes from one of the older kids. We are trying to implement your great ideas, and so appreciate your channel.

[@christyloucm]

This video is amazing! I have been doing this for so long...the trap. My life is gonna be different today!! Thank you for relieving some stress and bringing some positivity in my life!! Love your videos!!

[@elunico13]

@28:20 The Idealist stays focused on the vision. The "right" expectation

[@here5D]

I really appreciate this knowledge, I had a lot of what you teach in my heart but didn't know how to put it into practice. So glad you're putting it out there for us 🥰🥰🥰

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Glad it was helpful! It seems to be that way with many parents, so I'm glad I can present a system to make it happen.

[@maryannekendall3344]

Why didn't I find you when I was in the thick of homeschooling and how come in 20 years of homeschooling, I've never heard of your message? Ugh! I'm homeschooling my last hild in his last year as a widow and have been doing this as a widow for 6 years. If I had seen this 6 years ago, homeschooling while grieving might have been a lot more successful.

[@ClaudiaHelmkeMiller]

Thank you for all that you do for all of us Nicoleen! I’m so grateful for you! 🙏💕🥰

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You are so welcome

[@MonicaBU]

This was so so so spot on for me. Thank you 🙏🏽

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Yay! I'm so glad! You're very welcome.

[@Nathan_Delannoy]

I never comment on KZbin videos, but this was great! Very valuable content, loved it.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@ashleyallen1858]

Sooo powerful. This is KEY! Thank you Nicoleen! 💗

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Agreed! You're welcome!

[@stmaryarchangelmichaelthea8191]

You are the best ,I don't remember I ever wrote a comment .and English is not my first language and it was really easy to listen to you and understand every single word. something enter the heart directly .something touch you so hard while you are talking. God bless you from all my heart .

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Thank you! You are so sweet to say such nice things. I'm glad my message has touched your heart.

[@christineb2640]

Watching again 😁thank you ❤

[@cheyennedarneal2304]

Thank you! Laugh out loud at the lawn bit!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

You're welcome! :)

[@queenoftiming]

Excellent breakdown.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I'm glad it was helpful!

[@stuartharper5646]

Thank you for this. This is transforming our family.

[@jesstinasteiner5741]

Thank you Nicholeen, for bringing clarity into my life,now is up to me to change to the cycle of success! So looking forward to being a better being, as wife, mother of 5 teens n friend!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I'm sorry it took me so long to get to this. You're most welcome! You're absolutely right. You've got this!

[@SS-in1ts]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ you’re a life saver!!

[@karentingler4937]

Wow, thank you! I will have my hubby watch this with me!!! Thanks

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Yay! It's always better when both spouses are on the same page!

[@TheUnstoppableEntrepreneur]

Nicholeen, you are GOOD!!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Thank you so much!

[@samanthasarah77]

What about single parents with 50/50 ,custody. Can you have different parenting styles and still use your techniques?

[@Philippians2..10]

Yes!!

[@constanceholden2411]

Do you have any special advice for a single parent household - a Dad with one son ?

[@lindsaydain8437]

Have you considered creating the children’s books in softcover so they are more affordable? I am a self published author. I would love to help you.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Oh yes. We're working on putting them all in one softcover book so that those outside of the US can get them for cheaper.

[@omvxop]

Hello.. I have been listening to you since November last year when I lost my job. I'm a tradie now so you are in my ear for 8 hours solid.. I have bought your books all the journal and cue card poster . I was a little disappointed more dishearten that I could not print these to make life easier. Single mother of 3 I truggke to re write it out. After trying many times I gave up.. I've had these now for 6 months and cannot print.. why is this not printable since we pay for it.. I mean I could have bought 1 journal book rather than 3 and photo copy.. I was told it was so people don't copy? But its doing nothing on my computer.. I now after nearly a year have it down pat and after reading self gov book 3 times I am now about to re read it with my children.. please can you make it so we are able to print 🙏🏼 God bless

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

I'm so sorry I'm just now seeing this! I would recommend you reach out to Richard. He's the one that helps people with struggles like yours. You can email him at [e-mail] and he'll help you figure it out!

[@jennifertiitinen9006]

I love my stepsons and also so annoyed by them

[@Unicorncain1]

😂 couldn't hold my breathe after smoking 😂❤🎉

[@preetygirlc]

How I may receive these books?

[@SCORPI0SAVAG3]

Link to purchase the books lol

[@kathleenpugh2641]

Idealistically, I've met roadblocks. What does the single, full-time working mother (that works nearly an hr away) do? I've thought that I've had a firm grasp. But, I'm now being faced with the reality of 2hrs before bed. Of course, mutual accountability comes into play. Can you provide a suitable script that I can adapt? Or an outline of the script?

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Sorry for the late reply. That is a great question! The full response to your question is too long to type up here, but I'd love to learn more about your situation and have the opportunity to answer your question on one of my weekly Support Group calls that happen Wednesday mornings at 8am MST. That way, other people that have similar questions and concerns to yours can hear the answer too! If you’re interested in talking with me more about it, check out the link for more information: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!

[@robertabrown4123]

What if your spouse will not work with you and your whole house and life is not organized or consistent...at all! I just feel like when I'm hearing you talk, it's with a brady bunch marriage and family.

[@chrisstroesser6563]

How about an ex who is a malignant narcissist who routinely manipulates the children?

[@pastthefog6514]

@@chrisstroesser6563 😮 that would be very hard.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

That is a great question! The full response to your question is too long to type up here, but I'd love to learn more about your situation and have the opportunity to answer your question on one of my weekly Support Group calls that happen Wednesday mornings at 8am MST. That way, other people that have similar questions and concerns to yours can hear the answer too! If you’re interested in talking with me more about it, check out the link for more information: teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope this helps!

[@maryperrysmith5815]

You actually made me laugh check check check

[@benjaminpetty7696]

What if you just want to be left alone. No kids. No spouse. Quiet. No dishes....nothing.

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

There's definitely a time or place for that. It's doable with a little planning ahead and communication. Even I need some alone time now and then. :)

[@jennifertiitinen9006]

No I don’t feel that way at all.

[@michelinapalmer6035]

Please how do I order those 4 skill set books for the children?? I don’t see a link to purchase in the description. Thank you for what you do!

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Sure. Order the books at this site for the best price. teachingselfgovernment.com/store/

[@Truth.419]

How about the stepmom who will never be given the same respect as the stepdad

[@TeachingSelfGovernment]

Great question! I've added it to my list of video topic ideas, so hopefully there will be some content about it in the future! You can also ask this question on my weekly Support Group live conference call, where it's recorded and answered in a group setting so others with similar concerns and questions can get answers too. I'd love to take the time there to go in depth! teachingselfgovernment.com/store/support-group/ I hope to hear from you soon!

[@jennifertiitinen9006]

I don’t get her at all