THE FILIPINAS' PRESSURE WHEN DATING A FOREIGNER!!

Join me as we delve into into the experiences that Filipinas have when dating and being with a foreigner. This is only my opinion based on what I've seen and experienced. So, yes. I hope you'll watch it. Enjoy!

[@miketurpin4959]

I love it here and want to live here for the rest of my life. The Philippines makes me feel younger and healthier than ever. I'm 51 and feel like I'm 10yrs younger😊

[@isreeramotar3868]

Absolutely 💯 correct…I married my wife in the Philippines 🇵🇭 6 years ago, love ❤️ everything about it and no regrets…I’m only 55 years old, thanks to god, I’m a bit privileged. NYC 🇺🇸 got to me after awhile, so I only travel back and forth now. I could tell you the history, but you get the picture. Work on it my friend, it’s not that difficult…stay strong and healthy!

[@platoon1081]

Can you be more specific of what you like about the Phillipines? I am a 63 year old retired male and am interested in the Phillipines. Thank you.

[@kingbeestacker873]

I'm coming next month to be with my LDR of 5 months. I'm about to turn 49 and I hope that I feel like I'm 10 years younger. I can't wait to experience life there.

[@rrrrrrny]

@@platoon1081 prepare to support the whole family of a girl you are going to be with.

[@PaulRobbins-uu2ew]

I'm shopping for tickets, doing my homework & plan on coming if I can get there without the vaccine or a stick being run up my nose & into my brain.

[@ministryoftruth8588]

Well I was correct. Seems I'm the 1st comment too. It'$ all about the Benji$. I catch some grief for this, but after a few trips to the PI I've learned my lesson. I now have a 'Policy': NO "meeting the family" UNTIL I've dated the Pinay a significant period of time. & if I DO 'meet the family' it means I'm considering her for a VERY LTR or Marriage. If her family bombards me with 'loan application$' & '$hopping list$', then unfortunately I'll have to 'cut ties & Run'. I'm a generou$ man, but if the lady 'doe$n't fit in the budget', $he'$ gotta GO! I do a 'cost/benefit analysis' with EVERYTHING I get involved with in my life, INCLUDING 'Love' ... 'Cold' I know, but this is WHY I can AFFORD to travel abroad!

[@isreeramotar3868]

Absolutely 💯 I always lived by this principle 😊NO is my first name! Stay safe 😊

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Always set your boundaries! Always!

[@secretagent86]

hi Mia, you have come a long way in your language and confidence. Congratulations on your marriage. As a foreigner i am aware i would be in the top 2 % there. I worked hard and no one helped me. the whole concept of helping/ lending is a way to continue poverty. One guest on the filipina pea (a gorgeous pinay, married to a rich man... she had six sisters. NEVER gave them cash. but set each one up with their one beauty shop and trained them!). "feed a man a fish, feed him for a day. teach a man to fish, feed him for life". We SHOULD NOT endlessly send money. If someone wants to help their girlfriend's family, i would suggest showing up once in a while with a huge bag of rice and tons of food. If my girlfriend (i don't have one... in Canada now) there wanted to work, she could give her salary to the family. that is her business. sometimes i think finding an orphan there is the best solution. yes, it is complex, but NEEDS ARE ENDLESS there, and even if a millionaire you could lose all of your money. ps. foreigners should not build a house. buy a condo perhaps. if i cannot have 100 percent title or joint with wife, i would NEVER think about land/house. sorry for the long message.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank youuu :-). Yes, it's better to help them by giving them something that they can work on and have an income. You can lead the horse to the water, but it's up to them if they want to drink or not.

[@richardlane1130]

Wow, great video! Validated my observations with my fiancée's family and friends. Life certainly changes for Filipinas dating foreigners. There is a perception that we have MONEY trees. As you said, "You must set rules, boundaries, and limitations." Once a money precedent is set ... there is no turning back! This can be started with a birthday gift, paying for a family meal, or even a vacation for the family. I call this "FEEDING THE TRIBE!"

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Yep. It's a big change for us Filipinas. Yep, always be firm with your decision, especially when we are talking about money here. You will never know.

[@DianaOldfield]

I was already a nurse working abroad when I met my English husband and all my brothers have got jobs and houses but being married to my husband has definitely upgraded my lifestyle. But it's so nice not to have the guilt that I have got a good life because my brothers have got good lives too.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Lucky you :-)

[@colemant6845]

My Son Married a Peruvian Woman... SAME FAMILY EXPECTATIONS. His new wife Expenses suddenly became ours. Not the American WAY AT ALL! This is a Huge Cultural difference and should be CLEARLY UNDERSTOOD before entering into a relationship... Especially Marriage. Good Topic to fully clarify. Thanks!

[@evansmaketo1643]

"Feeling guilty because you are eating a delicious meal when your family members are eating a simple meal...". This clearly shows how responsible, caring and loving you are. This is what differentiates you from women from other countries. This perhaps explains why there is a gold rush for good women for marriage in the Phillipines

[@michaelshaffer2813]

Hello from Clovis, California, USA. I don't think I'm a good fit for a Filipina. All the things you discussed here and several more will be terrible obstacles for me. As I watch this video I began to feel as if I am being groomed, manipulated, pressured and led to slaughter. I could go on to explain why, I'll not bore you. I just don't think a relationship with a Filipina would work for me. I do love your videos! Thank you.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you. But you know, it is up to you if you want them to manipulate you. You can always change the situation.

[@michaelshaffer2813]

@@filipinalifewithmia5208 Yes you are correct. "Change the situation" sounds to me like, change the Filipina. As we all know you can't change a person. Trying to change a person is not love for that person. Perhaps I'm getting a little too old for the dating scene.Thanks for the reply, love your videos.

[@humpy936]

I married a Filipina, I have never been pressured by my wife to support her family, and her family has never pressured her or me, Filipinas have much more to offer than western women, I have left it to my Filipina wife that if she wants to work she can send some money to the Philippines now and then, but it was made known I expected her to contribute to our household first, it’s never been a problem.

[@mikesimpson9997]

Good subject. I see supporting her parents in another house if they are not well off and helping provide for them. Everyones different but i know it would make a philpina happy to see her parents living a dream life too. That would make a lot of guys happy to knowing his wife is happy

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

It's entirely up to you whether you want to support her family or not. Whatever makes you happy, of course.

[@isreeramotar3868]

The many things most of us takes for granted, it is just a dream for a lot of Filipinos…I can relate to what Mia is saying, because my Filipina wife was halfway there, and working in Kuwait 🇰🇼 at a young age, until she met me. Now we have a family of our own and she is living the dream, which I proudly gave her and my daughter. She came from a family of 7, but nobody bothers me or her for anything. We chose to move from Bicol to north of Manila in Bulacan, where she works a good paying job and our child 🧒 is at school 🏫 I’m no where close to retirement yet, but for me , NYC 🇺🇸 to the Philippines 🇵🇭 is a hop and a skip …I love ❤️ it. Stay safe, healthy and blessed y’all.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Wow, that's nice :-)

[@bohiorepublic]

Excellent points...we often take for granted things you just pointed out are incredibly significant...great video

[@miketurpin4959]

My Filipina has a job. She's worked there for 10yrs and I will never tell her that she can't work. She loves her work and her boss treats her like family and has basically been a father figure to her since she's worked there. It's a Private catholic school and she loves it so much

[@user-jp7ms1zt7r]

I can't imagine thinking it's my prerogative to tell my wife she can't work.

[@thomashouser6515]

Hi Mia! What an important topic. I met my Filipina wife in 72. She was helping her family long before that. She is the oldest of 8. This will destroy an average relationship. The Filipina Pea once said. If we don’t want to deal with the family, Marry an Orphan! My wife has a kind heart! I told her I help the family for Her! Not them! Also it is a big Blessing to be able to help and not be asking for help! God Bless! You also have a kind heart!

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you, Thomas. That's really nice of you :-)

[@MrDoobie834]

you are lovely and very informative. I married a girl from Cebu and life is better. I can validate much of what you tell people. Thank you because people will benefit from your insight to your wonderful culture

[@MG77740]

What’s funny are the terms Filipina and foreigner. In all of my dealings and friendships with Filipinos in the states, I don’t recall hearing those terms even once. I’ve never used them with my wife or daughter in law. I wonder if it’s because of my area in the US or just a states-side thing. I suppose it could be that there’s a concept that we are all Americans over here and there’s lots of people with heritage from all over the world. For us, I was the one to offer to sponsor and assist the parents. My wife never asked for money but occasionally worked when the kids were older and I believe helped a sister out or family member, with her own money and I never asked about it. The Dad stayed with us a few years before he passed away. He had his corner of the downstairs and it was never a problem. He helped me with a lot of house projects and I’m really glad we had him with us and that our kids got to know him.

[@michaelausburn1755]

This was a good video Mia. I honestly wondered what kind of pressures my Filipina might be facing from her family. I have considered this and asked her but she would actually do her best to avoid speaking with me about this topic. Thank for opening up and explaining some of the pressures. Much appreciated Mia. You, your family and Paul take care there always and God bless.

[@rrrrrrny]

That’s a red flag 🚩 if she is not telling you.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

We Filipinas don't talk about such things. The best we can do is just hide it from you guys and try to find solutions to it.

[@rianneanne6582]

Im a public servant so its not a fitst time for me stayed in hotel, no pressure about it as long as you could do what you are😀...gossip of nieghbor inevitable because of jealousy..

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Yep.

[@puravida5683]

I really appreciate your frankness! I have lived and traveled around the world as a U.S. expat. I currently live in Costa Rica. I am single, and of vast means. I grew up in poor and humble circumstances. I truly understand what it means to have been poor! However, after 40 years of working hard, sacrificing and investing. I achieved financial success. As much as I would like to have a relationship with a Filipina, I could not culturally support her family. No one financially supported me, beyond childhood.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you :-). Yeah, when you are poor, you will have to do everything just to get out of that situation. Well, it's up to you, sir, if you want to support her or not. It's your decision to make, not hers.

[@mtkidbigsky7230]

Thanks for the video. It’s always nice to see from the perspective of a Filipina.!

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

No problem :-)

[@tessmencidor9590]

Excellent Video Mia. One of the reasons pertaining some of these issues between foreigners and their Filipinas partners is that most of these women come from the most impoverished levels of The Philippines. Many times they are very young single mothers, with little education and see a foreigner as their only way to escape poverty.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

And I couldn't agree more. These Filipinas see them as a way to escape their situation and have a better life.

[@bryankoziar2867]

That was a good video Mia. Your husband is a lucky guy to have a good wife like you. The message is a good one for Foreigners that are hoping to make the Philippines their home. I wish you all the happiness in the world.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

I am also lucky, sir :-)

[@miketurpin4959]

Luckily my Filipinas family has their own jobs and we only take care of mama. I love my future mother in law. We have a great relationship and she will always live with us unless she doesn't want to. We live in Marikina city for now and when we move mama can move with us or stay with her son. It's up to her. We don't have to worry about sending money to her family because they all work hard to take care of their families but we do help if we need to.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Oh, good for you :-)

[@petepinal8415]

Hi Mia, Thank you for sharing this great & valuable information. I wish more, and more Filipina bloggers would talk more, on this subject, with their subscribers. When we foreigners come to the Philippines, and enter into a serious, long term, and loving relationship with a Filipina, we count on, and expect our beloved wives/girlfriends, to protect us from that type of being taken advantage of. Keep up the great topics, and say hi Paul for me, love you guys, 😎😉👍🏼❤️.

[@bradleyb.425]

Men expecting their women to set boundaries for them and protect them? Shameful. Grow up, act like a man and set your own boundaries. Men are the protectors.

[@davidwright5619]

Hi Mia thank you for the simplest and most honest description of Filipina motives and pressures they experience. This helped me to understand more in depth and will help me when I meet a Filipina. Because of your direct honesty and clarity I have subscribed.

[@HemiChrysler]

Based upon my experience, a friend has advised me to inform girls that, should we start dating, her father is very likely to fall ill.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HAHAHA that's the usual reason why they ask for money.

[@HemiChrysler]

@@filipinalifewithmia5208 exactly correct

[@chandie5298]

I can only speak for myself.... so your mileage may vary. I have been married before (I'm from the US) and although I don't know the experiences of others... I did take care of some of the expenses of my mother-in-law. My point is... it is not completely unheard of for western men to put out some effort to care for their in-laws or their own biological family. And I would not be opposed to helping the family of my filipina spouse. HOWEVER... for me, it is not an obligation. I am doing it out of the goodness of my heart. And I will decide how much and when I will provide. I won't take it very well if the relatives are demanding things of me and treating me or my spouse as if I am obligated. And if I am providing something for them...and they consistently are always expecting more....it is clear that they only see me as an alternative bank account and my reaction will be to provide LESS, not more. And if they pressure my filipina to leave me to find a better alternative bank account then she will have to make her own choices.. I won't try to stop her. I'm sure I will be quite sad, but sometimes life is sad. It is her own family who are spitting in my face when I am already helping them and it is they who are using their own daughter without any thoughts of her happiness. This is the difficulty with combining different cultures. There has to be a meeting half-way. There must be understanding on both sides.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

When it comes to providing support to family members, it is important that both sides have mutual understanding, respect, and clear limits. Each situation is unique, and it is important for individuals to prioritize their personal well-being and happiness while also taking into account their partner's and respective families' needs and expectations. Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts and experiences.

[@andyreiben]

Thanks for your honest replies, perhaps the best thing to do is to know more about the family of the Filipina girl/woman and also put clear bounderies.

[@alanbarnes3569]

This was a very good video, thanks. The differences between foreigners and Filipinos are polar opposites. It takes time and patience, if this is what you really want. You may think you are getting a pretty girl that looks good on your arm but you just swap one set of problems for another. The grass is not always greener on the other side. Have a great day 😊

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you for watching. I agree.

[@The-Cat]

Nice to learn the perspective of a Filipina in this situation. I'm taking notes cause this is interesting and very useful to know thank you 👍

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HEHE thank you :-)

[@SunRise-ul7ko]

It's the 21st century. I'm not living in the stone age. Woman asked for equal rights. They got the right to vote over a century ago. I exspect them to pay equally.

[@westwonic]

Best you don't go to the Philippines then.......

[@SunRise-ul7ko]

Rights without responsibility is called privilage. If they don't want the responsibility, I'm fine with that, so long as they take the rights away.

[@Hoochie243]

Mia, I wish you could talk about the struggles of a foreigner dating a Filipina....most of us don't complain about how hard it is to date a Filipina and something so simple as the cooking....I don't like Filipino food...it's very salty...and I can't even bare to look at Filipino pasta....it's a insult to my Italian culture...it would be like if I served a Filipina rice from a Box.... Filipino time is a big deal for me. I spent 25 yrs in the US Military so organization and being on Time is important....I never hear men in the Philippines talk about some real life issues especially the Heat...I think it's easier for a foreigner to adjust to the Philippines than a Filipina to the US

[@hubriswonk]

I don't care for Filipino food either and the always late mindset concerning being on time really aggravates me as well.......and then Tampo.......I taught my Filipina how to cook, she is now a GM at her job and her time skills greatly improved and she doesn't like my answers for her Tampo BS at all! hahaha! It has taken some time, but better now........still a lot of work to keep her from burning down the house after ironing clothes!

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

That's a good topic. Thanks.

[@damncars2618]

Suprised to hear that your experience is similar to ours. I've dealt with money issues by giving my Filipina an allowance. I don't give to anyone else. She makes all the decisions based on her judgement. Of course it's never enough, but I explain, everybody has a budget. We have to live within our budget and make the best of it. I also explain that I can't save everyone, because only God can do that. As far as the Bad us foreigners tolerate, chismis is the worse. So I don't friend all that I should. Many missed opportunity for friendship because of chismis. Even the local police and firemen want to know my story. They assume I'm a chickboy and that hurts. 😢. But they all know my name and are friendly now. I'm also constantly a target of begging and have to be on guard for scams and "special prices". Anyway the love and kindness of my Filipina makes everything worth it. I'm sure you agree.

[@JohnSmith-nx7rx]

Crybaby...gossip back OMG LoL

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

I am so sorry to hear that. Hahaha, yes, it's the best news station here in the Philippines, the Chismis or Chika-Chika. You will just know that you are the talk of the town because of the way they look at you when you walk past them.

[@raydunn3501]

Great content Mia,,, and so true. I wish the rest of the Filipino nation see this,,, and understand it. Best Wishes

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you. I hope so too :-)

[@danielvillareal2569]

Just subscribed. Watched and like many of your vids. Your understanding and honesty about relationships between foreigners and Filipinos is fantastic! Keep doing what you do and thanks!!!

[@Lync1111]

This situation is a catch 22 so to speak. When a man wants a Filipina he should do research on the culture to learn of the situations over there. Note: Once he do this he should already understand there may need to be some assistance if he truly love her and I mean love her to the point through research of learning how close nit the families are and what this truly means as for a bread winner of a family. All situation are slightly different, It truly depends. Yes there should be a serious conversation from the foreigner and the Filipina up front and if the two are in agreement go forward but! keep everyone out of your business. Me saying this is aimed at those judging or telling the outsider to avoid her reality creating issues between her and his new love. Again this takes deep connection between two people agreeing to love each other into a marriage that bonds him her and extended family. Remember the culture there relies on each other, It's just the way it is. So Do you really love her or is it an illusions drive by lust. You Decide - to each and every man whom falls for a Pinay and want her for a wife.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

It is important that both partners have an open and honest discussion regarding expectations, obligations, and financial support. Love should be the foundation of the relationship, and it's critical that both parties are on the same page in terms of their commitment and readiness to support each other, including possible commitments to extended family. Finally, rather than superficial standards, the choice to seek marriage should be based on true love and an in-depth connection.

[@Lync1111]

@@filipinalifewithmia5208 Amen!

[@robertg1450]

I know I'm 42 and love the Philippines and love my wife and my life

[@jerrymylove1754]

I’m 44 and my Filipina gf is 34. We get so much hatred towards us everywhere we go. I mean literally everywhere we go someone has some problem with us. Do you encounter this as well? I’m asking as you are only a few years younger than I am.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Good for you, sir.

[@StephenYurick-qk3ib]

Mia, I want to share with you how impressed I am with your postings and performances. You are coming into your own as a blogger. I have enjoyed seeing your confidence grow and congratulations on learning a new valuable skill.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HEHE thank youuuu 😅

[@donaldsvnnh3161]

This was a awesome vlog and possibly your very best ever ! My compliments and appreciation for your knowledge, break down, honesty, and personal experience. Simply amazing, Great job 😊

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you so much :-)

[@ronindude9640]

Great video. I loved the honesty. ✔✔✔✔✔✔

[@coms00]

This content is some of the best counsel and advice I’ve received via PH videos, very thought provoking. Thanks Mia 😊

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HEHE thanks 😅

[@wasblindbutnowsee]

Have taken a lot of Filipinas to a lot of nice restaurants, then they tell me their friends, relatives , and their dog is starving. Each time I told them we could send all the money we spend on eating out to their family and eat at home. None of them thought that was a good idea.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Very true!

[@Srichardson64]

hi hun.... LMAO @ food O's... but you still kept your figure....girl power!!!!

[@therealsuperkyl3]

I really like your videos but i'm interested in your opinions and takes on Filipina-Foreigner from moving to the foreigner's country perspective. In my case, my filipina is moving here. Great video!

[@briankendall65]

From my own perspective and personal experience.. You are going about the situation backwards.. You should come to the Philippines and live here with her .. She's going to end up Homesick in whatever country she goes too.. The culture shock is going to be less for you than her .. trust me.. If you really love her ,Come live here .. Or that beautiful girl who you fell in love with IS GOING TO CHANGE INTO SOMETHING THAT YOU BOTH AREN'T PREPARED.. FOR..😢 1ST LIVE HERE

[@isreeramotar3868]

Absolutely 💯 correct 👍 You might not be able to handle the heartaches…so don’t do it mate! You have a better chance in the Philippines 🇵🇭 Good luck 🍀

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thanks, Kyle. But with your situation, I can't really say anything since I don't know your Filipina. You have to assess her properly if she's not the type of girl who will dump you once she gets a green card. And if she's a good girl, well congrats. But I think she will surely miss her family.

[@franknorman1383]

The reason why so many do not get involved with Filipino women is because when you marry someone like a Filipino women it's required to financially support all family members, another words, a walking atm machine

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

No, you don't have to support her family. It is up to you whether you want to support her family or not. It's not the girl's or the family's decision if you will support them or not. It is your money, and they never worked a single penny for that. It is yours, so it is your decision and yours only.

[@spyritwind2540]

I've watched a couple of your video's and thank you for covering some topics or sides to certain issue's that are not always pleasant. It's nice to see a Filipina being honest about some potential down sides. Unfortunately I've experienced many of the dark or bad sides. :( Filipina's should come with a warning label :P

[@JohnSmith-nx7rx]

Exactly my friend... exactly!

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Of course, I don't do biases. I mean, sometimes I do. HEHE. I am so sorry to hear that, I hope you're okay.

[@ejtaylor73]

I think a lot of the hate towards foreigner relationships comes from jealousy, because it isn't them that is benefiting from it. Many say communication and adapting to each others cultures will be the hardest thing, but I think it's dealing with all the marites and people JUDGING them (Against the word of God they PRETEND to have faith in) is going to be the Filipina's biggest challenge, that "crab mentality" sets in hard against her. She needs to be mindful of what she says and around who she says it, don't put the ammunition in the gun the marites will turn and use on you. If others can make her relationship fail, then they can try to move in and be the "lucky" one. The next problem will be managing EXPECTATIONS, not just her own, but her family and friends as well. Just because she's with a foreigner does NOT mean her friends/family are going to profit off of it as well, and she needs to be mindful of their actions towards the foreigner as well. Me personally, I am financially responsible for myself, my wife (live in girlfriend) and OUR child/ren (Should we have any together), NO ONE ELSE, anything beyond that is me being kind and generous. I didn't work most of my life to pay for someone else's early retirement. A relationship can be easily destroyed by her friends/family's greed. Another thing she will need to do is REMAIN HUMBLE, don't think you are better than anyone else is and look down on others, what is given can be taken away. A Filipina with a foreigner may have it better off financially and a bit better life than she would have, but it is in no way going to be easier on her because of all the negative people around her trying to bring her down.

[@rorybellamy2533]

Thanks! like hearing Mia share her happiness

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you, Rory.

[@mikee5654]

It's so nice seeing you as we met you. Happy to be with Paul, Now you shine your love of life and love. I'm blessed to be allowed to see such a union. Amping always and salamat

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you, Mike :-). You too :-)

[@jacquesjtheripper5922]

The 1st 20secs are spot on already.. What a mess it can be if the family of your sweetie is in a bad mess situation and all around them the same. And only problems, and bad decisions , habits, choices around them, only adding more problems.. It can be endless, and only get worse. Even if u say no, they will pressure her until she's in a nervous breakdown, does anything to change this, like end herself or earn in bad ways. And will affect constantly your relationship from the stress she gets. Cheers..

[@Starbat88]

I love your videos, Mia. You always cover interesting topics.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you for that :-)

[@awilliams310]

Love your channel. I'm from Canada and looking forward to coming over soon.

[@George-ux6zz]

Have an amazing day, take care and God bless you Mia 🙏 😊

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

You too.

[@ForceMajorex]

Thank you Mia for your video. Every time you look more and more beautiful. Your videos look good, your language is clean and professional.wish you all the best.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you :-)

[@backontherighttrack.]

Very clear and helpful explanation. I have set my sights on marrying a Filipina ever since i met one for the first time in the UK 7yrs ago but i must say the more i watch videos like this from yourself and others im beginning to have second thoughts and think i may be better off alone.😞

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

You don't have to be alone. Just be careful and wise with your choice of a Filipina.

[@humpy936]

Great video as always Mia, there is a large cultural difference between supporting families in the west compared to the Philippines.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

So true!

[@offthecuffadventureswithjamie]

When I saw the link I had thought of a few things. You nailed them all! Great Mia!

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank youuuu

[@jeffcoleman7859]

I think Paul is a very lucky man

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

And so am I :-)

[@George-ux6zz]

The funniest ones are the ones who ask for money the first time you chat. I've had a couple send me a first message asking for a loan bcuz her parents had a car accident and breeds emergency surgery. I don't even respond to those, I block them immediately.

[@isreeramotar3868]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂the trick of the trade….

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HAHAHAHA that's the usual LMAO

[@TobbeVisby]

The attraction for men is manly beauty and youth (fertility), the attraction for women is manly social-economic status (provider/protector). If we give away all our money, the only reason left for attraction is the family-bond. What woman would knowingly give away her beauty and fertile years, without getting anything for it?

[@panan7777]

In other words: Sex was NEVER free.....

[@eddietowe8897]

Very good advice. Thank you so much. I hope I don’t experience that. I will be firm about my boundaries !

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you for watching. Just be firm when it comes to your decisions, and I'm sure it'll be okay.

[@jerrymylove1754]

I am 44 and my gf is 34. Every time we walk around and go anywhere we get so much hatred and bad comments towards us. I’m relatively fit, and i am always polite, respectful, to people I meet no matter how much money I think they have and what they do. I don’t drink, smoke, or do drugs eother. It boggles my mind why we get so much hatred and anger towards us. We live in Cebu and have been in the Philippines together a year. We traveled from north to south and it seems to be pretty much everywhere we go. The guys seemed to really have an issue with me. I feel bad for my gf as she has to sit there and listen to all the bad things from them. Not sure what to do but leave as I don’t want to put her through that.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Oh, I am so sorry to hear that you experienced such a thing. It's just sad that people make bad comments about other people's relationships without minding their own business. Oh well, that's what you get here in the Philippines, the so-called "chika-chika".

[@jacquesjtheripper5922]

Yh cebu and big cities is worse it seems. They mock the gf with comments like 'You like big pets' etc 🤦 No moral education seems.

[@pierre931]

thankyou for talk honestly and againt you interests.....anyone must manage his originary family and dont permitt that they ruine the happyness of the new couple.......family and parents must never put their nose in the couple if not for ammeliorate it and create harmonie

[@BetoMelancia]

Im from Portugal and You got yourself a point iv benn having lots of arguments with my gf from Cebu bec she worked 6 years only for the her family and still she wants part of our money to go to her family so we trying figure out a solution so the family can have a stable income and we can save for ourselves too. sometimes its overwelming that issue

[@tomdailey4819]

Great video I love your honesty.... I told my philippine a girlfriend... That I will never ever support her family. I hate people who are bums... And I have no problem telling somebody no... We've been together for about 8 months, and none of their family remembers ever asked me for money....

[@owenmarshall78]

enjoying you life in philippines

[@platoplombo15]

This was enlightening...thanks.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you :-)

[@boblynnekal]

Thanks so much for your honesty

[@leotorres1709]

Good point. Excellent coverage of motives andintent.

[@Dutchy-1168]

Why should a foreigner support her family ? What moral obligation does he have to total strangers …. Give me a break ‼️‼️🇨🇦

[@Galactica55]

is an important topic I was also traveling with a filipina in March, even if I wasn't in very expensive hotels you have to be aware that you spend more per day than she pay rent per month the way back to the boarding house is then certainly not that easy

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Yah. That's a lot of money here already.

[@NYMagicPlaya]

Great video. Keep up the great work and keep it coming

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you. Will do!

[@NYMagicPlaya]

@@filipinalifewithmia5208 You welcome

[@williambreeze2659]

What a well thought out video!

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thanks!

[@alberthead4806]

bow that was very good advice and warnings,

[@garygilliard8628]

Very good Mia. Great information

[@FindingAFilipina]

Aw, i wasnt aware that my filipina endures this much pressure from the fam 😬

[@tilapiadave3234]

That makes your wife a GOOD Filipina

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

We tried to hide it :-)

[@antonthemanton3065]

So family and friends can sabotage a relationship.... gotcha. I have experienced something like this in the west, but just in different ways.

[@dilpickles5928]

I think a lot of problems that arise in relationships are a complete lack of cultural and social/economical awareness. I think if you're going to move to a new country you owe it to yourself and your future partner to have at least a rudimentary understanding of such precepts. The Phillipines has a population of 1/3 of the United States crammed into a relatively small land mass by comparison. This means there is fierce competition for employment and by and large it's very difficult for young people to find work, particularly those that live out in the provinces. There is documentation required before most places will hire you and given how slow and burecratic the Philippines can be this can be very daunting when looking for work. There are no social supports in the Phillipines. Think about that for a moment. Many foreigners have the luxury of retiring in the Philippines as a direct result of thier social supports by thier respective countries. Now imagine having none. What would you do? Where would you go? There are very little social supports in the Phillipines. Many fillpino's will not meet eligibility requirements and even those that do, such supports may be grossly inadequate. As you can see, it's very difficult to build any kind of generational wealth. So it often falls on the children to help support thier families as they get older. Fillipino males are often unreliable so much of the burden falls upon the fillipina. Yes if you're in a long term relationship and or are contemplating marriage then yes you should have frank and open conversations with what your expectations are "without" judgment. Personally I wouldn't mind helping someone's family as long as it wasn't expected all the time and I felt it was genuinely appreciated. The fact that foreigners can provide much needed income and support to people that genuinely need it, isnt such a huge price to pay as long as it's done in moderation and doesn't adversely effect the lifesyle you're trying to live. To many have too little in this world and to few have too much.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

You make reasonable observations regarding the value of cultural and socioeconomic understanding in relationships, particularly when moving to a foreign country. Understanding the Philippines' issues and realities, such as the competitive labor market, a lack of social services, and the burden typically placed on Filipinos to support their families, is crucial. It is important to have honest and nonjudgmental discussions with your partner about expectations and boundaries. It's critical to find a balance in which you can help your partner's family if desired while also ensuring that it doesn't become an unsustainable burden that hinders the lifestyle you both prefer.

[@rodrigo1965]

Great information and advice Mia, thanks for sharing..

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank you for watching!

[@gim6109]

I agree, when I was dating my late husband I heard those pressure from my friends or people knew me not in my family luckily I came from a small family😁

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Yah, it's funny how they put pressure on you, not knowing that they don't even contribute a single penny to your life.

[@kalasatwater2224]

Subscribed coz you're not afraid to say it how it really is

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thanks 🙏

[@xrpwatts2116]

I told my wife i will support her not her family before we got married and in the future if they haven't bothered us about support and i come into money i will help them out. The main thing a Philippines family should want is their daughter to be happy and taken care of. After 10 years i started buying them medical supplies huge bag of rice a month gotten the father out of jail twice brought two babies into the world, healed one brothers son from walking pneumonia. And as soon as i retire and we have house we want i will invite parents to live with us. I do lover her family they are all nuts lol But as a foreigner you have to make sure the family knows this before marriage if not you might be miserable because you didnt. it is bad enough for her parents to go thru all the behind their back talking in the village because their daughter is married to a American. the village people can be brutal. They even thought i was going to pay for a burial. I told them they've been doing this for hundreds of years without a foreigners help they can do it now, I refuse to pay for funerals unless its direct family i will bring a baby into this world but i wont take part in most burials.

[@xrpwatts2116]

When i asked my wife to marry me i put it out there before the marriage even to her parents that im only responsible for supporting their daughter and our future child. So they never asked me for anything they were to afraid to lol I did tell them that if they treat me with respect and honor my wishes in the future if i had money i would help their situation. Which i now do. But i still dont support them i mean medically big bag of rice monthly. Now i do give my wife a large amount of money to pay bills i do not ask her what she does with the rest so if she helps them out more thats up to her.

[@user-jp7ms1zt7r]

Mia, how do you recommend that a Filipina manage this kind of situation? Is it realistic for the Filipina to tell her family that she refuses to be the middle person? If the foreigner tells the family he'll "teach them to fish, but won't go fishing for them," how would they feel about that?

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Managing such a scenario as a Filipina might be difficult, but not impossible. The Filipina must set clear boundaries and talk frankly with her family about her expectations and limits. She can explain that, while she values their relationship, she may not always be able to meet their financial needs. Encouragement of her family's independence and empowerment to discover their own solutions might be a beneficial attitude. If family members have grown to rely on the Filipina for financial assistance, they may be unhappy or even angry. Lastly, it is critical to find a balance between helping family members within appropriate limitations and keeping personal boundaries. To handle this circumstance in a way that respects everyone's needs and constraints, the Filipina, her husband, and her family may need to compromise, empathize, and communicate openly.

[@jacquesjtheripper5922]

​@filipinalifewithmia5208 if the family is in bad situation, it will never end, even if u say no. Push, stress your gf until she ends herself, or does bad things to earn to help her family. Especially for basic needs, food, health issues, rent, bills..

[@patrickmanley4943]

An excellent video.

[@kevinreist7718]

So, even in the States the best way to handle family wanting money can be to give them some type of work to do so they can earn the money. They could wash your car or mow your lawn or clean your house or cook for your family or do your laundry or maybe even go shopping for you to avoid "Joe" marked up prices because merchants like to charge foreigners extra. There are lots of ways to meet them halfway if they want some money. No need to just give up your money for free.

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

You are entirely correct! Providing opportunities for family members to earn money through labor or responsibilities can be a fair and mutually beneficial method. It creates a sense of empowerment, dignity, and reciprocity within the family dynamic.

[@kevinreist7718]

@@filipinalifewithmia5208 It seems more than fair to me, because the "money under the table" method means they earned it tax free.

[@rona8663]

Great video and so true. Thanks Mia

[@WineSippingCowboy]

Similar to Latinas with foreigners. Problem: entrepreneurship is not stressed in Eastern nations including The Philippines 🇵🇭. Thus, many Pinoy families become dependent instead of independent. Some foreigners will leave Pinays + The Philippines 🇵🇭 because of the exploitation. I would do the same. Observation: a good number of Chinese and Indians who are in The Philippines 🇵🇭 live comfortably 😊 They learn to be entrepreneurs as well as doctors, lawyers and engineers. Many Pinoys do not become entrepreneurs or engineers. Thus, they lose their chance to thrive. 😖 I , an American 🇺🇸, was in The Philippines 🇵🇭 in 2022 and many years beforehand. ✈ I noticed these. 👀

[@Tmidiman]

New information here about the family moving in and the guilt the Filipina feels. That makes sense.

[@bellwetherone5739]

So how do you deal with these pressures? How can you politely set boundaries?

[@kennethedwards1677]

Great work Calvin, keep more of these coming. Men need to know the pitfalls. In the US, unfortunately we're raised to be chumps, and are ripe for the slaughter :(

[@justaskKj]

Every time I hear you say yummy 😋 food 🥘 it made me smile 😊

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HEHEHE :-)

[@torbjrnmelbye6823]

Thanks. This is interesting 😊

[@morrisbingman4956]

Great video good info really adjusted my expectations 😊 TY

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thanks for watching!

[@Alesor1989]

That's true relate much, not from my family but the far relatives, neighbors and friends even a person that i didn't know but they know me😅 Crazy if they know you have a foreign boyfriend or husband the way they look at you is dollar.

[@winalitetexas1]

Has anybody found a reasonable airline to get to the Philippines...

[@isreeramotar3868]

There are, if you want to do 35 to 40 hours before getting there….I’m in NYC 🇺🇸and PAL flies 3 times a week…the fare now is about $2,000 round trip and 16 hours direct…about $900 + if you take 2 days to get there. Good luck 🍀

[@lifeuncommon1116]

Yep Air China. £530 London to Manila, 14 hours. Bargain

[@rocrobert783]

Very good video

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Thank youu

[@dustinquinton]

If I was in a serious relationship, or married to a Filipina, I wouldn’t want to see her parents live in poverty. I would gladly help. I really don’t want to see anyone live in poverty. Also, I don’t lend family money, I just give it and don’t expect anything in return or ask to pay it back. That way, there are never any issues. I’m a kind guy, not a nice guy. Nice guys expect something in return.

[@markoneill771]

It be interesting to hear your opinion of what a fair and just allowance for your Girlfriend or Wife Filipina family?

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

HMMM, I can't really say anything about that.

[@michaeladams9250]

Have The ledger how much money you willing to lend about twenty-five hundred pesos to start about$50 no more money if they don't pay you back. If they do pay you back you may up it 1,000 pesos or $20 absolutely set a time limit to be paid back. May cost you $50 but you can absolutely get rid of the leeches on your back, that has no attention on paying you back. This works only if they ask you for a loan. Make sure you write it all down in your ledger.

[@nolove857]

It's not your obligation to support the Filipinas family. They have fully capable brothers and sisters that can support themselves. They are not disabled or uneducated. They can go to school and get a job. They can go work with their fathers and mothers that work on the farm and earn. They have to learn how to "stand on their 2 feet". I'm just sayin.....

[@filipinalifewithmia5208]

Yep, that's true. It's not your responsibility, but only theirs. If they can work, then why not?