The Gray Speckled Walls Encroach: The Perks and Liabilities of Frequent Flying

In which John makes an old school vlogbrothers video from an airport. OBVIOUSLY I MADE THIS BEFORE WE HIT 1,000,000 SUBSCRIBERS. To celebrate, let's get the nerdfighter kiva group to $2,000,000 in loans: www.kiva.org/in...
Thanks to all of you for creating this amazing community with us. I feel so lucky to be a nerdfighter. Your commitment to increasing awesome and decreasing suck inspires me every day. DFTBA.

[@andreahernaiz7776]

Is anyone else watching this is 2020 and Johns comments about the apocalypse are weirdly accurate to what we’re living now?

[@TheKingShyGuy.]

🙋‍♂️

[@annakeet]

+

[@devanshichandak3605]

Yess

[@aditi_05]

Yup!

[@catherineonodera3174]

Still lands true in 2021

[@swastiksahu6889]

Wow. The Plague joke didn't age well. And congratulations, John! You haven't been affected by it and we're glad

[@joshuashain5891]

John talking about the plague 7 years early

[@lumenjoslin4301]

0:49 JOHN MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE JUST PREDICTED 2020

[@karenweiner1857]

I WAS JUST THINKING THE SAME THING!!

[@Joesphfffffff]

So weird watching this in the Corona pandemic. Don't get out in front of John, stay home!!!!!!

[@callannowacki1356]

This video aged... Glad you weren't in an airport when Covid-19 hit

[@kashiusford9361]

The irony is that when the plague came, John avoided catching it

[@dorissaclaire]

“When the plague comes that’s going to devastate humanity” oofffff tooooo soon. It did start on planes and in airports.

[@sabrina-wq4uu]

Your perception of half-naked is a little skewed imo.

[@notsam7928]

How do you know if it is a zombie apocalypse if you become a zombie early. It's gonna be super lame if you become a zombie and then the zombies get defeated right after.

[@alaska7766]

Covid 19 foreshadowing

[@pancake3027]

plague speculations hit different nowdays

[@j-money2337]

John: wow that's a cool status! Super Elite gold platinum status guy: filthy casual.

[@paulina7047]

the people in the airport think that i'm crazy. the people in the airport think that i'm crazy

[@maddydissinger6049]

John seven years ago: I want to be at the forefront of this upcoming plague. John now: actually following COVID guidelines for some reason?

[@Carrie25]

"Oh my God, I have to go hide somewhere." Relatable.

[@clarab9597]

Carrie Parsons I

[@andrewrobertson1473]

0:49 It has begun

[@Beansandbeansinc]

0:50 you mean coronavirus

[@TheYambo121]

Watching this in an airport... In front of grey speckled walls... Weird...

[@teas-party]

lmao, ill probably be doing the same thing in a week..! which is also funny considering this was from a week ago ;3

[@queenwyntir]

"I have to move because the risen sun is too bright in my losing eyes." John Green, you brilliant word-man.

[@tmkf2692]

That guy with the ten million miles sounds quite similar to the protagonist of the movie "up in the air". actually the only similarity is that the guy in the movie had to fly a lot as well

[@Trumpetguy1109]

The "plague that devastates humanity" comment hits different these days

[@Efflorescentey]

Omg more people need to see this. “So as soon as the next rabbit plague hits... it’ll be me to get it first.”

[@katiewhoop24]

the fact that new book is put so casually into this has made me freak out quite a lot!!

[@lucymoon]

"...and I'm going to work on my new book" WHOA THERE JOHN, BACK UP. THIS MAKES ME TREMENDOUSLY HAPPY.

[@j-lee72]

I wish i had a writers way with words.

[@3LostRings]

"I have to move because the risen sun is too bright in my losing eyes" OHMYGOD. I cannot take these TFIOS quotes coming from the man who wrote them. They make me want to jump up and down and cry and scream and giggle hysterically all at the same time. Super-intensive fangirling.

[@Jasmine-mh3kf]

I don't agree with you. My dad works away, and sometimes I don't see him for an entire month. When he does come home, it's only for a few days. However, he is a wonderful father. Besides the fact that he works away to provide for us (us being his family), what he does with the limited time he has with us is what makes him so great. So, it's not how often my dad is home, but what he does with his time home and how much he loves his family is what makes him a great dad.

[@AbandonTheFort]

Someone (or multiple someones) have probably already said this, but this quote was is The Fault in Our Stars.

[@KatzePiano]

Your message about the fact that being a parent means being around is the exact same message the most recent episode of Call the Midwife had, interestingly. Probably not that interesting to most people, but I just thought it was an unlikely coincidence to have almost the same sentence/moral in two things I watched within a week of each other.

[@totallynameless7592]

So, speaking of plague...

[@namewithay]

> when the plague comes really gonna need you to stop this, guys.

[@taramercer4370]

Soooooooooo... John Green predicted COVID-19?

[@cat860]

I start crying every time John uses a quote from TFiOS.

[@EphemeraAeterna]

Love this video. You are an awesome person, John.

[@ace21pwndff13]

John, shouldn't the people in 'your' airport b e used to you talking to a video camera? I mean... the staff and what-not.

[@lukeb1351]

I am from Dayton, Ohio!!! haha

[@anasophia8759]

You blinked!!!

[@ririnyy]

I FELT THE SAME WAY. He said it so nonchalantly and I was like "NEW BOOK JOHN DON'T FOOL ME BRO."

[@michellehoehne]

"I have to move because the risen sun is too bright in my losing eyes." OHMYGODSTOP. STOP YOU PERFECT BEING. *begins to sob*

[@saturnday160]

Honestly kinda miss airports. Actually no, REALLY miss airports.

[@Bea_Esser]

0:53 is kinda spooky, but I can say that the plague predicted did come & John lived.

[@IshtaVlogs]

Go to Verla Kay's Blue Boards - you'll have to google it, since we can't post links in the comments - and join SCBWI (an international professional organization for writers of works for kids and teens) and ask around on their boards for people who are in or want to start an online critique group. SCBWI also has a board where people can post their work for feedback and also give feedback to others. Know that critiquing is usually a give-and-take thing. Also read writing blogs. :-) And WriteOnCon.

[@laurenjohnson5983]

New book!

[@qwertyface72]

Yes he is a writer. They tend to write many books.

[@juhjinkies]

I think we all think you're such a good father because you were there with your son and because you include him in things you like to do and let him make decisions like what to eat and drink. You talk to him and interact with him and don't treat him like a silly little kid, but like someone whom you love and care for.

[@GowanRavin]

Oh hey Ruairi - fancy seeing you here ^_^

[@Knyajo]

I'd never thought of "first to die" as a perk of anything before.

[@suppusan1]

"I have to move because the risen sun is too bright in my losing eyes" yes good.

[@RadiantSun478]

The Land of Nerdfighteria just reach a population of 1,000,0000! Someone break out the champagne poppers!! (also with the dancing lobsters and Hanklerfish)

[@Ladyknightthebrave]

John Green is it bad that your frustration made me giggle so hard my stomach hurts? I feel like thats mean

[@snowflower419]

I like the old school video's!!

[@P00P0STER0US]

With the unbuttoned shirt, he'd have looked perfect in the airport lounge.

[@rowdy35967]

I got upgraded to first class once and that was cool, but what was even better was a 14 hour flight home from Germany where there were like 60 people total on the airplane, I had a row of seats entirely to myself. Sleeping on the plane is so much easier when you can raise arm rests and lay down. The flight attendants made sure I had a seat belt on, but otherwise didn't care. The tiny number of people also made everyone more relaxed, and I got to know some of the other passengers. It was awesome.

[@Chouetterargentee]

Is anyone else wondering when exactly airport videos became old school? I don't want to be a hipster fan and pine for the days when this less-polished aesthetic was normal, but I'd be lying if I said I'm not going to miss these if they become less frequent. There's a way to justify this, I hope? Maybe it's a more intimate experience if things aren't quite so legit? I don't know, I'm glad this whole thing exists in the first place. It's pretty amazing. DFTBA :)

[@renragged]

Don't worry about the shirt John. I was fully naked the whole time I was watching your video.

[@thetrilliantwin]

Guys. I just did the math, and John is going to stay home the next few months because THE YETI IS GOING TO GIVE BIRTH.

[@JoshuaHerbison_this_is_my_URL]

New goal: find a way to get John Green paged next time he's in an airport.

[@RedSox379]

Next time I'm in an airport, I'm going to page John Green. Just in case.

[@radio_static6222]

Who else paused the video when he said "Work on my new book"?? YES!!!!!!!

[@sheaelliott942]

Still waiting for that new book, John. Any updates for us?

[@123Snapedudette]

Um so last summer I sat in a seat... In the middle... of the second to last row... Makes me so happy :-)

[@encanta411]

NOPE totally thought the same thing, when you fly in creative mode!

[@elspeth73]

I've only been paged at the airport once, and that was because they wanted to tell me that they'd found my luggage that they'd lost on my outward flight 3 days before. I'd rather they just hadn't lost it in the first place. Oh and John, how do you cope with flying so frequently in light of your fear of heights?

[@kenzacamel]

It has been my dream to somehow meet you in an airport sometime while you're vlogging

[@c11z]

I humbly request a list of the least horrible airlines in your experience.

[@kaaaaaaaaaaaatherine]

YES. And me.

[@hiqwertyhi]

3:14 I have to move because the risen sun is too bright in my losing eyes

[@CoadyL]

This didn't age well.

[@maddieperry7988]

Who else went back to see if his shirt actually was undone the entire video?

[@dramaismydurg]

Did he say....new book? 8o I have always said, you want to meet John Green? Then go hang out in an airport.

[@linsey1717]

NEW BOOK. YOU BETTER STAY HOME & WRITE THAT

[@fromscratchauntybindy9743]

2015 - thankfully Ebola hasn't taken us down that rabbit hole, yet

[@IJustWantToUseMyName]

2020 - now COVID 19, on the other hand...

[@celenameg]

My dad is recently retired from the military and he has been on deployments so many times, it honestly became a routine thing. Its a normal part of life for a military family to have one (if not both) parents gone for an extended amount of time. And the normalcy of it is what is so terrible. While my dad is an excellent dad and husband, I think that all of that time spent away actually made us a closer family. We appreciate each other so much more for it.

[@FirstFallSnow]

Hooray for good parenting plans, mild nudity, and A NEW FLOOPING BOOK!

[@savindafishies6832]

Pandemic-relevant

[@annainwood49]

the first vlogbrothers video I watched was Tumblr: A Musical

[@VivianJade]

You keep mentioning the people in the airport thinking that you're crazy, but apart from that hallway scene, we almost NEVER see anyone else at these airports. They all look abandoned.

[@carriechameleon]

Watching this in 2021, like...

[@MyFriendIrene]

"I've got to move because the risen sun is too bright in my loosing eyes" I ACTUALLY SCREAMED OMFG

[@strangecharm1962]

i travel a lot and my immune system has perfected its germ fighting properties

[@rowanowl]

Wait!! John! Are you going to London leakycon!???

[@KY_CPA]

Good news... You weren't the first when the plague came!

[@mahadragon]

John's ability to come up with random interesting thoughts is amazing. My brain doesn't work like that, I don't know how to think random like that. I think more in terms of linear thoughts that go in a chain instead of broken links. Unfortunately listening to linear thoughts takes longer and doesn't translate well into Vlogging.

[@theTofuCube]

The Nerdfighteria has been behind so many awesome things that I assumed the million milestone was passed ages ago. In fact I would have guessed in the neighborhood of 2 million. I guess that shows how much concentrated awesome there is. Love what you do, guys.

[@Alexa-jh6fu]

Where is this new book you speak of?

[@Zedstergal]

I'm sure you do care about environmental issues, but it seemed odd to me that in a video all about flying you didn't mention the harm it's doing to the Earth. But I hope this was just a slip up!

[@pinehill2408]

Soooooo...how's that 'being in an airport will put me at the front of any plague that might befall us...." working out for you? (She asks, while she, in her 2014 time zone is currently listening to the woes of airports as they fly people who are stricken with Ebola all over the world, sometimes twice. )

[@saranna00]

My dad would easily spend four nights a week on business trips when I was a kid and I know that doesn't put him the Best Dads-category, but he's still the best dad for me.

[@7HomemadeProductions]

The problem is that you went to Windsor, Ontario. I've heard that Windsor has some of the toughest border security EVER. And, yes. I live in Canada.

[@emmetgirl]

Us infrequent flyers make more frequent mistakes. I've flown like three times in my entire life, and the last time I did, I had to be paged because I asked my mom to hold my sweater for me while I got my boarding pass, and then neither of us realised she was still holding it until after I'd gone through security. It had the word QUEER on it in giant yellow letters, which I'm usually proud of, but in that instance, coming back to claim it I felt like, "Yes, hi, I'm the forgetful homosexual..."

[@SirOwllin]

Is quoting a line that you made up for a fake book written by a fake author narrated by a double fake girl still quoting yourself, or have we just gone too deep to know anymore? That aside, I'm not a very frequent flier myself, though I love flying. I even like the food, to be honest. Of course, I have not yet traveled without at least one member of my family with me and I'm almost always going to see family, so that might have some affect on my feelings.

[@zoeredadams]

True story: my local park, Victoria Park, Bath, UK, is named so because of a rather funny story concerning our late Queen Victoria when she visited once. There were crowds of hundreds, thousands of people anticipating her visit. When she arrived, she hitched up her skirts a little more than usually when stepping out the carriage. A little boy near the front shouted "Hey, look! I can see her ankles!" She was so embarrassed that she jumped back into her carriage and was briskly driven away.

[@RincewindIsMyHero]

My dad was away growing up for weeks at a time. Just be a good dad when you're there and never underestimate the value of bringing back presents when you come back (my dad brought me those little hotel shampoo & soap bottles, so cheap, free things are fine). Also, understand that your kiddo will likely not be dependent on you or need you around as much because they...well, get around just fine when you're not there. So...don't force it when you come back, or it might lead to frustration.

[@elwynbrooks]

Dear Yeti, This is probably presumptuous and not-my-place to say, but: sometimes it is really easy to objectively know that your partner is busy or has a lot of responsibilities and still subjectively still feel left behind. I pray to God that you don't ever feel that, but just in case you do: Remember that your husband loves you so much, even if that left-behind feeling sucks. Thank you for being so great and supportive

[@emilizabify]

want to know why people get paged? They get paged because someone else took the seat they were supposed to sit in (that was near the front of the plane) so they ended up in the second-to-last row, and had to wait (even though their connection was only 20 minutes after this flight was scheduled to land, and this one had been delayed by 12 minutes) while the old people in front of them very slowly disembarked, and then had to sprint to a different part of the airport, all the while being paged.

[@mynar_lenahan]

I don't know. I'm kind of keen on the no-fighting, just blankly watching the zombies as they take over. Like a complete depression, before, after weeks and weeks of staring out the windows, they just open the door, lie down and wait. Which is morbid, I'll admit. Yeah, I guess that could be funny, but it'd be funny to see the zombie getting somewhere interesting, then SPLAT, but it'd be cool if he was just crippled, rather than actually dying. He loses half his torso. Because zombies stay alive.

[@EllieElectric35]

You're absolutely right. I didn't think about it that way. A friend of mine actually wrote a play that follows that sort of plot line. The characters start out fighting but in the end they realize that it's pointless and they decide to just give in. And here I go again with the comedic aspect, but what if they follow the zombies point of view, and just as things are getting "interesting..." SPLAT. Zombie dies.. ...re-dies? ...is vanquished? Either way. That could be funny.

[@elizabethw3813]

Dear John, so I today my english teacher assigned a new project and its on great authors. Obviously I thought of you as the author I would pick. So I'm patiently waiting to tell her the author I plan on writing a biography when this girl in front of me says,"I would like to pick John Green the author of Perks of Being a Wallflower and Fault in Our Stars." No Just No. First of all dang it! And second of all Perks of Being a Wallflower?

[@mynar_lenahan]

To be honest, I don't agree with that. I think that it could be a very long and interesting movie. Instead of just having these people fighting zombies all the way through for minor survival, we watch them as the zombie apocalypse builds up, and show scenes of zombie attacks all over the world and then they pretty much come to the realization that they're screwed. So they run into the crowd and die. Or maybe they become a zombie, and we just follow the zombie epidemic from their view.