The HARD TRUTHS About Living in KOREA 🇰🇷 Dating, Culture Shock, and Friendships

[@marlonaleister]

I will be making an FAQ video coming up soon! any questions or thoughts you have that you wanna see in the upcoming video, leave them here and I'll do my best to answer! this video is something I've wanted to make for a while, but debated back and forth on whether I was being to blunt with my thought process on this hahah but I hope that another pair of eyes or opinions can help you potentially break out of your comfort zone/prepare for the realities of living abroad :-) any questions or concerns, feel free to ask away. as always, thank you for the love and support

[@rechanrechan]

Have you tried haggling in Korea? How was it? (like in the fish market etc).

[@이나윤-p5i]

South Koreans will be very friendly to foreigners who make an effort to speak at least a little Korean. The owner of this KZbin channel emphasizes the "importance of language" in this video, which is perfectly true. Let me say one more thing about cultural differences. In South Korea, there is no culture of 'small talk' with strangers. (Don't have a culture of saying 'Hello' to strangers). Even if you meet your neighbors in the same apartment building, you often don't say hello. The same is true when you ride in an elevator together. Generally, stay quiet in an elevator, avoiding eye contact with others. So, people in the U.S. or Latin America who don't know Korean culture may misunderstand that "South Koreans are cold". It's not racism, and it's not intentional coldness. It's just South Korean culture. (There are similarities to the behavior of people in Russia and some Nordic countries). This culture may be better for introverts. Because there is no need to smile, greet, and make small talk with strangers.

[@marlonaleister]

thank you for sharing this! very helpful info for anyone looking to come live in or visit korea :-)

[@karinmichanek]

As someone from a nordic country (Sweden) I really identify with your comment on no small talk, not talking to strangers, or neighbors and in the elevator.

[@Smoses_senpai]

As an introvert i think that sounds great

[@maniacqueenie4578]

I should be Korean 😍 I don't want to talk to randomers and talk about what her boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends sister did last night. Why would I even care 😂. All introverts need to immigrate ❤

[@jiminswriter4209]

That is not always true. There are some apartments where neighbors do greet each other. Of course, it depends on where you are.

[@rechanrechan]

I lived in Japan for 7 years (I'm Indonesian) and I relate a lot to what you said. The culture shocks, the friendship and language barrier, and even tho I come from another Asian country, a lot cultural values differ greatly. As people say, "When in Rome do as the Romans do". But to be able to do that, you need to know what the Romans actually do. So learn, study, and open your mind. Good luck guys!

[@marlonaleister]

im so glad you said this! this is definitely not just a korea life experience, so many people around the world experience this as immigrants and foreigners around the world. adapting, getting used to, and doing our best to learn is all we can do :-) thank you for sharing your experience!

[@1Skorpia]

This should be a series. You are helping many people with the reality check.

[@ohboy3841]

As someone considering becoming an EFL/ESL teacher in Korea, thank you so much for this video

[@marlonaleister]

teaching can be suuuuch a great experience, so long as you keep an open heart and mind and do your very best! I hope you can find your way to korea!

[@bethb.6813]

I appreciate your sensitivity and honesty. My Dad used to say, "You can't deal with anything but the truth." I totally agree. Thanks for sharing your experiences with those of us who have experienced Korea only from afar and want to learn more. Happy New Year to you, Marlon Aleistar!

[@enriquepalacios7833]

Thank you for the honesty, and I'm grateful for the truth to be told. much love.

[@tati79ana]

Even though I like your shorts that bring valuable information quickly, I love these sincere videos talking about life in Korea. I just didn't understand what you meant by "people in the military" when you mentioned the kind of people that you can develop a relationship with when you don't speak Korean. I'm moving there in February (counting the days!!!) and those videos are always very helpful, thank you so much!

[@marlonaleister]

thank you so much for enjoying my content! it means a ton, really really really. what I meant by “people in the military” is that korea has quite a lot of american army bases, so a lot of soldiers/people in the military that speak english that other people who speak english living in korea tend to meet while living in korea. I hope you have such a great time when you come to korea, it’s so so close! best wishes :-)

[@Chrislw35]

I appreciate the real approach to the hardships most will face moving there. I personally would love to have you do a real in depth video on dating. That would be a great watch. Thanks.

[@Meithesnowman]

this is exactly what i was looking for!!! thank you, Marlon. this is something that i really needed to hear from someone with experience in Korea, your video is realistic and not romanticized at all, it really motivated me to practice the language even more and to also be ready for these experiences that most of the people who move there will probably experience :)) new sub btw!

[@libbywish7123]

As always, thank you for your honesty and candor. I don’t think anything you said here was negative or bad, just useful information and very helpful. My daughter and I want to visit Korea and not offend the people we whose country we’re visiting.❤️💜♥️🙏

[@BegaW]

공유해 주셔서 감사합니다. 좋은하루 되세요 🙂🐬🎵🍀

[@dylanthekoreanteacher]

너무 재미있게 봤습니다! Really enjoyed this video :)

[@leylawalkingbyfaith]

Thank you for this video 🤍 love watching your videos.

[@enriquepalacios7833]

Thanks!

[@gabriellep9866]

Well stated! 👏👏👏 You bring up some good points.

[@user-pc8dl4cy3i]

Please give examples of “culture shocks” to help me understand more about the adjustment to Korea. Thank you so much!

[@aisuhe]

Heyy, love your videos!! Could you also do one explaining your language school experience? I want to go to one as well in Seoul.

[@dwightsimpson18]

I'll never find myself in Korea , ever , but I watched the entirety of the video ❤

[@dwightsimpson18]

You're beautiful keep up the great work extremely informative content only criticism I would have is sometimes you get to talking just a little too fast but otherwise thumbs way up 👍👍❤️❤️😘

[@Tomtom12654]

Keep it up! 👍 you’re doing great 😊

[@SKULLkidDEATHOMATIC]

I really love that the people I follow that live in other adroad are very real about it. I have I have seen and met quite a few people that were living in delusion just to find their "happy place". It's not something I like to see. Just accept reality isn't always pretty and try to work with or around those things. Move on if you can. That "happy place" is a facade, and it won't last forever, and if it does, you're not really right in the head.

[@KathySmith-ei9yw]

How is your Korean so good? Wow, I’ve only seen your shorts in English. I had no idea. Your Korean is 🔥🔥🔥

[@Little_Lycan]

Fyi, ngl, i think ur eyes are beautiful, its the light hitting them and idk why but I'm kinda mesmerized by it. 😂

[@marlonaleister]

stoooop ur gonna make me blush 😳 hahah thank you

[@Little_Lycan]

​@@marlonaleisteryou're welcome 😇

[@heycd]

Everything you said can definitely be applied to any country. I've lived in other countries and it always applies. It's not just Korea for sure. I think you're okay to not clarify so often about offending people :) because offence is a choice, so people are going to be offended if they want to be offended. That's on them. You're good, don't worry 😊

[@Gateoperations-z2z]

i love you Marlon ❤️

[@jfqzx]

I lived overseas for some years and while it was a place where I was comfortable languagewise the culture was very different, as in asian to western. Interestingly, ended up learning Japanese and made so many friends from all over. It was a big step out of my small country comfort zone and as an introvert I grew a lot. So I found my friends through interest groups and billingual spaces. I literally made myself arrange meetups online and I had no idea want sort of people would attend. I have to say my luck was good and managed to make long term friends, some who still to meetup when we stop by our current cities. Sometimes you just gotta be the one to start it.

[@gean4890]

You will be my new bestie 😅 I have subscribed 😁

[@ChandlerNWilson]

Thanks for sharing your experiences! How long have you been learning Korean for? And how hard/easy is it to visit Korea if you don’t speak much Korean? I’m trying to visit Korea over the summer so I’ve been studying but I doubt I’ll be able to learn toooooo much hahaha.

[@IsActuallyDennis]

Korea is very foreigner friendly in the sense that basically everywhere you go there is an English translation. Learning some small phrases will help, but you could really get by with just small basics. I’ve lived there for almost two years and my Korean is still very bad, but I survive just fine.

[@KiayaNaia]

Ehm... this is going to sound weird. But how personal questions are you willing to answer? And with that I mean like, would you be willing to talk about bad experiences or mishaps you've had so far? Things you don't think anyone to do or try? Places where people shouldn't waste their money or is overrated? I am asking because you seem to be such a sweet guy and I don't want to make you uncomfortable by asking for too personal questions. Thank you in advance.

[@Anonymous_422]

Lookism plays a vital role bruh......sad reality

[@G-Geography-su3lx]

There aren't perfect people and perfect culture any countries so people should accept the country culture when I am there rather than criticiste

[@_w0mbat_878]

I want to learn more about how much gender impacts your way of life, and how you will be treated compared to more western countries.

[@TheOtherSteel]

People will have trouble if they can't speak the local language? In other news, water is wet.

[@1Skorpia]

The problem with Westerners is they ASSUME everyone knows a lil English or will bend over to accommodate them. Like if you travel to other countries they have English translations and people think like them. They assume koreans will have western values or mentality. They're conservative, they keep to themselves, they have clear social bounderies and behavior. Learning the language is the LEAST and the most important thing a person can do going over there. It clears up alot and shows respect .

[@TerribleEnglish]

Are you saying that you have Korean friends or girlfriends who aren't interested in English and just treat you like a Korean? I find that very hard to believe.

[@marlonaleister]

I never said they treat me as if “I am Korean”, but rather I have friends and relationships that treat me just as I prefer, as a person. Sometimes, people will look to make friends with foreigners purely as an avenue to learn English, and I’m saying this from experience. In those instances, it’s hard to feel any closeness when your relationship is inately transactional. But I have plenty of relationships now where I use Korean and I don’t feel “other”. This is also not to say that relationships that come from language learning cannot be good relationships, but in my experience, it’s hard, especially if there is a strong language barrier.

[@TerribleEnglish]

@@marlonaleister I agree with that. I've seen many "if you just speak the language you can fit in" videos from many countries, so I was reacting to that, mainly. Because in my experience, you can't- especially when you're clearly a foreigner, like in Asia. We have to shoot for a happy medium where our friends (who are highly likely to be into foreign things or English, let's be honest) aren't just using us for that. That's a hard enough goal to reach, because their English is likely to be better than our Korean, or Japanese or whatever, for some time..

[@marlonaleister]

Sure, and that’s why I made this video! I wanted to emphasize the reality of the difficulty it can be to make friendships for English speakers in a country where English isn’t the dominant language, this is not just Korea. Some people move abroad just thinking of the positives or the honeymoon phase, but there are real struggles people should consider before moving abroad. That was what I was saying in this video :p

[@TerribleEnglish]

@@marlonaleister Yes, I suppose most people don't even get the point where I have frustration; starting to speak the language a bit and trying to get friends to not just speak English with me, which makes you quite cynical (sorry).. let alone your level of speaking it very well. 👍

[@ArtyomGonzarenko]

Can you make a video on how to find an apartment in Korea as a foreigner? The Jeonse rental system is very unique to Korea, and there is not much info online about this topic. I think many people would like to hear about your experience.

[@marlonaleister]

im actually planning on moving very soon, so I’ll make a video about the process and information about all the different kinds of contracts, types of places, etc! great recommendation :)

[@bethb.6813]

​​@@marlonaleisterWould you please also consider making a video on how to arrange a short-term stay, say 3 months in the summer. I am a senior who has come to love K-dramas and K-pop and finds lots to love about the family values and the commercial culture as well. I also love the sound of the language and will definitely become proficient before I go. But the logistics of finding a place to stay and of how to best immerse myself into Korean life and culture for such a short stay as 3 months while I am there are something I would be grateful to you for your knowledge and insights. Thank you, Malcom Aleistar (hope I got the spelling right, sorry if not).

[@MahnazRajabiEslami]

Can you talk about racism in Korea in your next videos?And thank you for all the first-hand and trustworthy information you share with as

[@andrewstewart5195]

I think the idea of having to speak Korean well to date Koreans isn't very accurate. It implies most Koreans wouldn't be able to speak in English, which isn't true. Most Koreans who you would want to date are university educated, and should be able to speak English well enough to date foreigners. For those Koreans that aren't educated to that level, or for those who don't speak any English, they would likely have little or no interest in dating foreigners at all to begin with.

[@dutchess6414]

Time stamps! ❤ 3:15 Culture shock 6:32 Friendships 9:15 Dating Btw Marlon it would be interesting to do story time about dating in Korea. Especially from a guy point of view. Spill the tea 😂👌🏼

[@HunterjMcgrew]

Outside of language barrier have you ever experienced a race barrier? For example I'm a white male from America and I'm interested in living in Korea one day, if I spoke the language fluently would I still have a difficult time making Korean friends and dating Korean women simply based on being an outsider?

[@무말랭이무침-x5s]

Korea do have a race barrier, but it would be not that bad if you are white.

[@house3933]

Your best vlog yet 💜

[@Smoses_senpai]

I support more actual Korean talking in the videos^^

[@8journey8]

I have heard that in many Asian countries, elderly people are looked after well and are honored for their wisdom. They are included in gatherings, well respected, and are even catered to. You have said that age has a hierarchy there in Korea. My question is: do the Korean people actually take care of their elderly? I live in the States and past a certain age, old people are discarded. They're abandoned in nursing homes or they live alone with few visits from family. Do you know about this topic, or have you not encountered it? Thank you.

[@cristinamayumi7322]

Great content. Based on a very good reflective skill + experience. If people get offended, that would say more about them than you.

[@RichFreedomDragon]

😎Good video. I travel around the world and may get to Korea soon. Could you make videos on how to look for for good affordable apartments that don't require huge deposit?

[@RichFreedomDragon]

It will be great if you could get to the main points in 1 minute of the video.