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@hollywiley56682 жыл бұрын
I would say expectations u have on the other person..too many is not a good thing, they have a tendency to feel like they’re not meeting them..
@trumpvance420242 жыл бұрын
We all are blessings when Jesus is found, he is smart man.
@dennischin8399 Жыл бұрын
@@hollywiley5668 8
@BC-ds3vv Жыл бұрын
@@hollywiley56685:28
@BC-ds3vv Жыл бұрын
@dragonrasp5:43
@rules4life3372 жыл бұрын
To have Dr Peterson in the world at this time is such a blessing .
@gareththomas22032 жыл бұрын
Yes We are blessed (not lucky) to have him and his family !
@OkxziRL2 жыл бұрын
More than a blessing. Its NECESSARY.
@sabejreid20722 жыл бұрын
An educated Human being is something to behold - not just educated, thinking and honest. We love him. I realise that there are some things I have to change in order to progress.
@cooliipie2 жыл бұрын
It's incredible
@cacaoscotti48272 жыл бұрын
too late
@_PJW_2 жыл бұрын
'Telling the truth' is about respectful honesty, not about hurting the other or being abrasive.
@CRISSGRULLON8 ай бұрын
Exactly, some people weaponize truth to manipulate guilty emotions like saying "just being honest".
@rejectionisprotection44487 ай бұрын
@@CRISSGRULLONWho generally can't take others being honest to them.
@dazza528611 күн бұрын
His a blessing to the world 🎉
@bestoddisee Жыл бұрын
50 years here for my husband and I. Honesty, laughter, being willing to step up and carry more than the other when your spouse is tired and hurts, saying thank you and a good debate.. I married my best friend. Best decision I ever made.
@ruthmurray9520 Жыл бұрын
This is good advice
@AuntiePinkEmma Жыл бұрын
Thank you for your wisdom. 👍
@irinaivanovic979212 күн бұрын
I dated my best friend of 20 years and it only lasted 5 months before ending in a total hell fire. WORST decision we ever made. And this is a man who many years ago in our 20’s (we started our relationship in our 40’s) told his coworkers he was going to marry me one day. Well sadly, it doesn’t always work out that way, ladies and gentlemen. Now hate each other and will never communicate again.
@elchucapablas3 күн бұрын
Please please tell that to younger women. It’s your responsibility because modern women detest to hear this from men.
@brentmckee51112 жыл бұрын
You are spot on in your summary of a relationship. We have been married for 46 years. My loving relationship with my wife is the most important and best part of my life. In 46 years you experience most of the challenges life throws at us. To me honesty, fidelity, mutual trust, communication and planning tomorrow and into the future has made our relationship something I wish every couple could experience.
@erikaarreguin76502 жыл бұрын
Wow!
@ritablanchard81332 жыл бұрын
I agree wholeheartedly with you. We’ll celebrate our 40th next month. It’s been an amazing experience. We are having a wonderful time now in our newly acquired retirement. We do a lot of negotiating.
@brentmckee51112 жыл бұрын
@@schmingusss Hi Gorrie, If you have a long history together and especially if you have children, it's worth seeking professional counselling. Sparks can be reignited. Cheers Brent
@susanbowman38652 жыл бұрын
@@schmingusss other people in our lives only act as mirrors for ourselves. Perhaps some honest self dialogue and reflection is in order.
@sizesmall17562 жыл бұрын
That's beautiful man.
@juliamalan Жыл бұрын
My husband told me when we got engaged "I don't believe in this 50/50 business in marriage... I believe in both trying to give 100%...so that if one day you can't quite make your '50%', it's okay.. I'll have it covered for you" ❤️ the sweetest and one of the most helpful quotes in our marriage. He really is one of the good ones 🙏🏻❤️😍
@johndummy337011 ай бұрын
So women are OK with not being treated as an equal now? You want a traditional man but still get the benefits of equality in society via equal pay? You women are confusing AF 😂😂😂
@seniorita328711 ай бұрын
Smart woman to have married this man
@Talgi9nv11 ай бұрын
Absolutely beautiful!!! Omggg 💕😊🥰🙏🏾
@ElisabethMaassen10 ай бұрын
Or 80% - 20%. Or 60% - 40% . You are blessed ! You probably deserved such a man.
@lukitaking256410 ай бұрын
BEAUTIFUL!!!
@millermanhal Жыл бұрын
Wife and I are opposites but complement eachothers. Once heard a couple who was married 75years. They were in their 90s. The man said the key to marriage was "not falling out of love at the same time." We all have bad moments and argue. But we never go to bed without saying we love eachother and kiss goodnight. I get mad or hurt sometimes as well as her but never effects our love and bond. 4 beautiful kids and 15years so far and I love and admire her more every day. ❤️ learned to listen to her better and carve out alone time to reconnect and show her she is loved.
@blackeneddove8 ай бұрын
How did you learn this? Through therapy, or just conversations?
@naturecare60722 жыл бұрын
The key is maturity. And stop any unnecessary drama. Accept, learn and evolve. Think what’s good for both of you, not just yourself. Lastly, happiness is an inside job. It’s not your partner’s job to fill your happiness. Your partner or spouse is just a bonus. Be grateful for the love.
@gaia72402 жыл бұрын
This deserve more likes
@culturecoroner2 жыл бұрын
No. They are not a bonus. To me, that view makes them seem to auxiliary, and makes you central. And self-centered, afraid to engage entirely. Does they make sense?
@naturecare60722 жыл бұрын
@@culturecoroner You attract what you project. You can't love no body if you don't love yourself. If you learn how to love unconditionally, you'll be rewarded with great love. Great love start from within. Without self love you can't find true love. You focus on yourself of doing what is right. Start from there. You're not gonna be selfish if you're intention is to love without any condition. Treat him right, respect and accept their personal views. Self love is doing the right thing for love not just for your partner but everybody.
@simonam7255 Жыл бұрын
I actually think this comment from NATURAL CARE@ is quite right. I am in my 16th year of marriage, and I have just recently realised the part with “happiness being an inside job”. It truly is my responsability to try to feel happy with my life, otherwise I end up having unrealistic expectations from my husband (and the other way around). Of course, this doesn’t mean your spouse should be indifferent to your sense of happiness; but often times, another human cannot make you fully happy and this expectation puts unnecessary pressure on a relationship that is nowadays increasingly difficult to celebrate in our society. I think a man and a woman who know their minds and have decided to live life together while maintaining personal autonomy have better chances to enjoy life together.
@tasnimshamsuddin7727 Жыл бұрын
One of the best comment!
@GLORYWIELDERS2 жыл бұрын
A powerful statement, "It takes a lot of trust to have a real conversation about what you need and want".👏👍♥️
@HelloBeautiful518 Жыл бұрын
Vulnerability in its highest form❤
@gibster96242 жыл бұрын
Met a couple that was married for over 60 years. I asked the husband what is the key to such a long marriage. I'll never forget his response. He turned to me as far as his body allowed him to turn in his chair and said "son, I don't hear so good." Such a powerful response.
@GabrielleTollerson2 жыл бұрын
and everyone clapped?
@gibster96242 жыл бұрын
@@GabrielleTollerson You missed the part that this was a joke right?
@lavinder112 жыл бұрын
@@gibster9624 sorry it wasn't that funny esp given the tone of the comment section
@gibster96242 жыл бұрын
@@lavinder11 jeezus. Pull the stick out of you but. Clearly plenty of others found it funny. No use being a stick in the mud because you can't take a joke very well.
@tim30622 жыл бұрын
dry
@ryanmoonshorts2 жыл бұрын
“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you ‘ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.” ~Socrates
@redblock13822 жыл бұрын
did he really say that haha
@ryanmoonshorts2 жыл бұрын
@@redblock1382 yes he did look it up hahaha
@IncineratedHam2 жыл бұрын
I love how this implies that being a philosopher and being happy is mutually exclusive 😂
@sorryilikeyou98032 жыл бұрын
Thats such a bruh moment lol🤣
@sammybolton25912 жыл бұрын
Nowadays, homeless.
@scrappppy42 жыл бұрын
JP seems to fit far better on a morning coffee talk show than in the trenches with culture warriors. He’s so peaceful and introspective; I’m always happy to see him in nurture mode, not combat.
@theancientsam2 жыл бұрын
I expected this interview to get nasty but it never did lol
@greyhunter32712 жыл бұрын
@@theancientsam it was a pleasant surprise. No ambushes or loaded questions. They Just let the man talk and had a chill time and asked questions
@Maxim.Teleguz2 жыл бұрын
He is discussing things about his wife.
@abundanceimani17112 жыл бұрын
yes.
@Blake4625kHz2 жыл бұрын
I like both moods
@HonestKeyboard17712 жыл бұрын
It's one thing to discusses different opinions with honesty, allowing for civil disagreement, versus someone attacking your character and diminishing you as a person. One is healthy conflict, the other is toxic. As always, thanks Dr. JP.
@rosros27952 жыл бұрын
Agreed.My wife is kind of passive aggressive caracter.It is a very stupid idea to try to argue with such an individual...Yaah man,they are always right...
@themetalhead14632 жыл бұрын
My relationship is completely toxic. I hate it. No way to fix it though.
@AlexHernandez-ee5hd2 жыл бұрын
But right-wingers aren't people, so it's a moot point...
@sabrinaclarus62902 жыл бұрын
@@themetalhead1463 How so? Do you need to explain? I've been there....
@ananascarpenter Жыл бұрын
So true!
@steinarbruun38522 жыл бұрын
We've been married 53 years. We have never stopped dating. Once a week if only coffee from a thermos in a neighbouring park. Conversation improves when you are away from your comfort zone. And we do not fight. Fights have winners and losers. Devastating in a relationship. We have conflicts which we resolve. One time it took us 3 days and nights. No sleep. Went to work, came home, talked. It was that important. Finally we were both content. That was 50 years ago. 8 years after that conflict we could not remember what it had been about. Paul Tillich wrote that you marry for the conflict. And that one becomes the right person for each other over time. Life is change. How it differs from the rocks.
@ianjones27312 жыл бұрын
53 years is amazing but just can't happen these days barring the absolute exception because women have been deeply indoctrinated into feminism which is cancer on any relationship.
@steinarbruun38522 жыл бұрын
@@ianjones2731 Sadly, you have a point. My wife has never had the feeling of being oppressed. We are equal partners and she enjoys being treated like a lady. Relationship problems usually arise when folks are unquestioning slaves to their inherited belief systems and trendy opinions and set them above all else. Relationships with the other in second place rarely do well. The root of the problem is that too many people let others think for them. As Albert Einstein said, "Thinking is hard work. That is why so few people do it."
@ianjones27312 жыл бұрын
@@steinarbruun3852 Thank you, there is so much wisdom in what you said and thanks for taking the time to share it. Bless you both!!
@shantim57627 ай бұрын
It makes me happy that there are couples who really have a great marriage.
@reploidphoenix2 ай бұрын
The sex life can only be maintained when ur partner is intimate in other ways that are meaningful. When your spouse will only engage in intimacy through sex and neglects the rest of the relationship..its a world of hurt and trouble
@holdinon77192 жыл бұрын
What changed my life was when someone said "Do you want to be right or happy?" It put everything in perspective. I only stand my ground on extreme moral issues. Most things are open to compromise.
@JM-bl3ih Жыл бұрын
thats a terrible statement to run your life by
@holdinon7719 Жыл бұрын
@@JM-bl3ih why
@idalily3810 Жыл бұрын
@@JM-bl3ih Why? It is impossible to always insist on being right and maintaining a relationship. Impossible. Picking one's battles is the only way to live happily with another person.
@Jake24378 Жыл бұрын
When ppl say “pick your battles” what do they actually mean?
@holdinon7719 Жыл бұрын
@@Jake24378 I guess don't fuss about everything little or big. Decide what you feel is important to stand your ground over. Life is too short to stay aggravated over dumb stuff
@stanleymartins-o3s3 ай бұрын
Interesting video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her
@linamoon-mi7wd3 ай бұрын
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go,i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
@stanleymartins-o3s3 ай бұрын
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
@linamoon-mi7wd3 ай бұрын
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
@stanleymartins-o3s3 ай бұрын
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
@francesctorrent51863 ай бұрын
You have to grief, underestand the good things happened and they are still good experiences just now they hurt. The the time to forget and move on comes. First get up the walk then run then sprint
@charmainemiles40892 жыл бұрын
When Dr Peterson talks about his wife Tammy I admire him more for all he has said and expresses his love for her. They are a beautiful story.
@tommac2111 ай бұрын
That's all he bases it on. Who wants his marrige. And nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors. Everyone thought my ex and I had a great marrige. Boy they couldn't have been more wrong
@bekind30502 жыл бұрын
I've been married for 25 years. It's been very tough. A lot of crying, laughter, struggles, etc. My advice is not to expect too much from your spouse. Try hard to fall in love again and again!
@peterrose5373 Жыл бұрын
You don't have to fall in love. You can get up and walk.
@rosad538 Жыл бұрын
My daughter asked me a while ago how I had stayed with her father and without thinking I said” I dropped my expectations “, which was true.
@kehindeakinsanya9336 Жыл бұрын
I can relate 😊
@adrienneanderson-smith2257 Жыл бұрын
Life is simple. Appreciate. Love. Respect. Be happy!
@bekind3050 Жыл бұрын
@EnchantedLove30 Yes indeed🤣
@somewhereisgone2 жыл бұрын
It's a red flag if your partner won't tolerate you standing up to them.That person can't be reasoned with.
@carmenrosario55392 жыл бұрын
Exactly what made me run from the "perfect guy" , even though I was broken. Impossible to get along with somebody who can not accept criticism or opinion.
@spencerkim47553 ай бұрын
That is my life. Walking on eggshells. Everything stays at the surface. Not fun.
@lala5061Ай бұрын
Yep that means they don't understand boundaries...they don't understand respect or solid lines not to cross 💯
@andrewmachado698816 күн бұрын
Yep. Many of my cousins are divorced because of this. They wanted to be the bosses in the relationship and you can get away with that for a certain amount of time until the day comes that your partner gets fed up of it and stands up to you. Marriages like that never end well.
@irinaivanovic979212 күн бұрын
Usually it’s narcissism at the root cause of that person’s toxic behavior. And this is true, it CANNOT work with that type of individual.
@helensmith73572 жыл бұрын
I just love Jordan Peterson’s frankness and bluntness in talking about relationships, e.g., how important it is to be able to tell each other the truth, and to be able to spar with each other. I keep learning new important things.
@RealAdvocateForLiberty2 жыл бұрын
The 12 steps of addiction recovery work, if you work them. Miracles and revelation happened for me in each step.
@hanshuman13822 жыл бұрын
We agree. Negotiate and plan together. Married 52 years.
@potapotapotapotapotapota2 жыл бұрын
honesty allows authenticity, just make sure you're honesty is borne out of love. It's possible to honestly say mean things to someone and not care about them.
@hopefull612562 жыл бұрын
Yes this comment is so true.
@sheiladyck47682 жыл бұрын
My husband and I just celebrated 43 years of marriage yesterday! People are always shocked when we say how many years - I think it's because people give up too easily these days, instead of fighting for the marriage.
@Carolmaizy2 жыл бұрын
But you both have to be willing to work on the marriage, or it won't survive. My solution to a bad marriage was : one- stay too long because I thought I could fix it all by myself, if I just tried hard enough. two: leave after 20 years and find a better person to love.
@mm-w54622 жыл бұрын
@@Carolmaizy a true relationship is a work in progress you find something new all the time and how you interact with each other to deal with it is so important. Also is respecting each others decisions on what path to take on any question in your relationship because your trust in your other half's judgement of a situation is intrinsic to their trust in you. Good luck to you Carol I am sure you will make the right decision. Sheila congrats to you 43 years this year for us is 41 years and basically we just respect each other.
@Daylesvk Жыл бұрын
@@Carolmaizy yeah the only reason a marriage or relationship could fail is only because one or both partners are being selfish
@dipthongthathongthongthong9691 Жыл бұрын
@@Carolmaizy Exactly. "Fighting for the marriage" is in large part code for "obeying the cultural institutions you have been conditioned into to that tell you you will have failed or will be deemed morally inferior if you opt out of a flawed relationship." Plenty of people "give up" on marriages and find happiness within or without others. "Fighting for it" is over-romanticized Hollywood stuff
@ShadaeBalancesKnightAstro Жыл бұрын
@@dipthongthathongthongthong9691 Yeah there’s a social stigma on divorce as marriage represents a certain degree of status. I do think that getting divorced un-amicably is a huge issue more so than the separation itself. The courts, bitterness, manipulation of finances, children causes significant consequences on the divorcees and the children.
@threadflowers9844 Жыл бұрын
I love that Mr. Peterson mentioned trust as being a huge element. I believe trust is everything.
@volkswagenation Жыл бұрын
Honesty will always build trust even if the honesty is unpleasant at times. Dishonesty for the sake of protecting your partner or self will almost always be found out. It will result in distrust and a sense of betrayal and that is really difficult to repair. Honesty = trust.
@UntilAllThePiecesFit2 жыл бұрын
The man’s wisdom And mentorship is so needed. Mr. Peterson please don’t ever STOP caring about the state of our affairs♥️ you are touching so many lives
@Abhishek-vz6ud Жыл бұрын
After 10 Years of Married Life, the most important key i feel to a Happy Marriage is communication. It means Sharing everyting from thoughts, feelings and expectations. For that sometimes we play couple questions games like “Lovify”. In this game, we have to guess what our partner expects. With small efforts, we are constantly improving our relationship ❤
@mangafq8 Жыл бұрын
Ugh. No wonder I'm not married 😂 To each his own.
@bontexx2 жыл бұрын
The man is a legend. I thank God for blessing this time in our existence with Jordan Peterson. He is an absolute necessity.
@tedharvick90102 жыл бұрын
Nearly 30yrs with my wife. Compromise has been what's kept us together. Like the song says, " I start walking your way, you start walking mine. We meet in the middle" Trust, faithfulness, and envisioning yourselves together 30, 40, 50 years down the road. If you can't see growing old with that person, let them go. So they, and you, might find that someone.
@mm-w54622 жыл бұрын
Your relationship does not have to be 50/50 you must sometimes give more than you receive and in the end it all balances out done right a respectful and loving relationship is a lifetime blessing.
@rosyapplekitchen635 Жыл бұрын
The thing is the older I get the more I see it as a bit of luck and also a willingness or lack of being willing to sacrifice. Dynamics change and sometimes one person doesn’t want to sacrifice but should they? For example, something I see a lot nowadays - what do you do if your sex drives are ill-matched? You can try all you like but it could mean years of one partner being unhappy and sucking it up just for the sake of the marriage. Or even resorting to other solutions…sometimes people need to reason or let each other go!
@SWags-ly7dp Жыл бұрын
"We gain a lot of ground when we both give a little. There ain't no road too long when we meet in the middle."
@MissHannah2036 Жыл бұрын
@@rosyapplekitchen635 yes that's exactly what happened with a close family member who had been together over 30 years. The wife lost interest in sex where the husband still had the desire and she was unwilling to meet half way. It meant he moved out because of the tension and resentment. They still speak everyday have 4 kids together, but if the both of you are not willing to compromise it will be the demise of the relationship.
@robnemily2 жыл бұрын
My mentor in College worked with Francis Shaeffer for 20 years in L'Abri - his number one advice in finding a husband/wife is to marry someone who you can fight with and "fights fairly"
@jBigjohndoe19712 жыл бұрын
I'm happy that Dr. Peterson was born in my generation, he's helped me with so many acts in life and is amazing how accurate he is with all his analogies..
@michellemichelle91432 жыл бұрын
I asked my older brother once how he’s stayed married so long- like what the secret is and he said “you just work it out” 😆 idk why but that has been the most profound marriage advice I had ever heard ♥️
@Peonies9252 жыл бұрын
LOL! I married a man that I shouldnt have and we have worked it out.
@markpitchford73752 жыл бұрын
@@Peonies925 sounds like he married a woman that he shouldn't have too.
@malyvo0 Жыл бұрын
Real story - I asked my old uncle when I was getting merried, since he'd been married for over 60 years at that point, He told me: "Don't you worry, you'll work it out. Just remember, marriage is always tough for like the first 60 years or so..." :-D
@htetaung04 Жыл бұрын
I believe that advice is great because like dr Peterson said people aren’t willing or able to know what they want and negotiate. Working it out means you think through what you want what they want and find possible compromise by negotiating
@destroyermaker Жыл бұрын
Yup, takes two very stubborn people
@jimmcfarland93182 жыл бұрын
Important to listen to a potential spouse's voice - in sweetness and in anger. Amazing how terrifying a voice can be, used malevolently. Listen to her or him when you have a spat, before you marry! What you hear could frighten you, and serve as a warning.
@thereaction182 жыл бұрын
Just saw a meme where a woman admitted how sexy it is when her husband breaks out the thundering man voice when the kids don't listen at bedtime.
@sitcomchristian6886 Жыл бұрын
My great-grandmother told my mother the trick was to never expect your spouse will change. Further, those annoying quirks they have? They will only become more annoying lol but they stayed married until he died! That always stuck with me. My parents gave me a lot of marriage training though, starting when I was about 11. What to look for, what a red flag would be, etc, and how to spot those things before you're too invested in someone (because you will totally lie to yourself lol)
@idalily3810 Жыл бұрын
Yes, my mother taught me that too: how to spot problems with someone before you get emotionally invested. Today's young people would think that's cold blooded, but it's really not. It's common sense.
@harleyseelbinder2 жыл бұрын
I debate with my girlfriend at least every week. Some people would say that that is unhealthy. But I would say that it has helped us both learn to negotiate and listen. I learned about negotiation when reading 12 Rules for Life and he explains that marriage is like 2 cats being chained together in a barrel. Everything is worth fighting for.
@brewerbrewer59882 жыл бұрын
So do i with my wife! I'd rate our marriage 9/10, 9 because never will there be anything perfect in this world. Its only when Judgements day Comes that God Will make everything new. In the mean time we've got to keep the relationship engine running. We both do that with love and zeal and because it is our Godly obligation.
@RomanDobs2 жыл бұрын
Repent for the day of the lord is near ( Sunday I mean)
@craterous2 жыл бұрын
Marriage was "invented" to help people grow. A bit of conflict, learning how to - and have the courage to- communicate, learning how to be content amidst it all, etc. helps us come to "fruition" as people.
@FedeArgentina2 жыл бұрын
Cats metaphore is about 2 people who doesnt solve their problems, hate conflict. And 20 years laters they are like cats, colected a lot of resentful, like afraid a bit of each other, any small intereaction could end in short words, cuts.. their brains are always in defensive mode
@extremeresponsibility2 жыл бұрын
Well done 👏 ✔️
@christinat.71712 жыл бұрын
We've been together almost 30 years. But doesn't feel like it. Things I know that work: respect for the other person's perspective/needs/wishes. Compromise helps a lot (within your values). Trust.
@rmmichael952 жыл бұрын
This really helps me get over my ex. Couldn't have basic objective conversation about reality much less difficult conversations.
@jesh8792 жыл бұрын
Sounds like most girls I know tbh
@osirusj2752 жыл бұрын
Like what?
@erwangaillard16374 ай бұрын
This is the case for most western women
@kristinmoore4624 Жыл бұрын
My grandparents have been married for over 77 years, my parents will celebrate 50 years next month and my husband and I are close to the 20 year mark. 💕
@TheDYNAMITE001 Жыл бұрын
These are great precedents. It matters to me if the woman I'm dating comes from such a background because like begets like
@likebubba Жыл бұрын
may you get to 77 yrs too 🙏
@kimgiles8748 Жыл бұрын
My parents have been married for 48 years, my husband and will be married for 11 years this year. We're still going strong, because of God; our third strand in our rope. Ecclesiastes 4:12 Easy-to-Read Version 12 An enemy might be able to defeat one person, but two people can stand back-to-back to defend each other. And three people are even stronger. They are like a rope that has three parts wrapped together-it is very hard to break.
@denisserivera89 Жыл бұрын
Brutally honest “I don’t care”
@tommac2111 ай бұрын
My parents have 64 and if you ask them how did they do it. Both will say they don't really know. Because there's no rules.But the love they have foe one another is undeniable
@SAOProductions19552 жыл бұрын
Keep short accounts. "Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger..." and being able to say "I'm sorry" and "forgive me" and common acts of courtesy are essential ingredients to any successful marriage.
@xcw4934 Жыл бұрын
"They have to be satisfied when you get what you want which is also a very difficult thing to manage." A really important nugget of wisdom buried there. I get the feeling a lot of people haven't really worked out what they want so they are easily persuaded by others by things they're told they "should" want. How many people pursued a particular career because their parents pushed them in that direction rather than an inherent interest or desire? How many people had kids because of societal and partner expectations rather than inherently want them? And then there are those who are motivated by the chase rather than the attainment of their goals. Great if they're some corporate visionary like Steve Jobs but I'd never want to live with someone like that, it'd be too exhausting!
@dawnofthedelts Жыл бұрын
Intimacy and effort. Those 2 things are so easy to let go when you become comfortable in a marriage.
@dennismcfadden7066 Жыл бұрын
I've been a Marriage and Family Therapist for 36 years. After observing a number of couples that appeared to have affectionate and amiable relationships (not in a counseling setting), I asked what their "secret" was. Certain behavior patterns popped up over and over: Respectful treatment of each other (especially in conflict), patience, gentleness and kindness. Dr. Tim Keller has an excellent book on marriage- "The Meaning of Marriage." Highly recommend it.
@delightfulgenius4635 Жыл бұрын
I read (in _Blink)_ about a guy who would record couples talking to each other about conflicts in their marriage, analyze their facial expressions, and feed it into an algorithm, and he could predict with 95% accuracy whe
@roxanatalmaciu7833 Жыл бұрын
Mr Peterson is a voice of reason that we desperately need in theese shallow times ❤️
@CarrieNoble-j4q9 ай бұрын
My husband and I married at the age of 18 and 19 years old . That was 59 years ago. We had six children and eleven grandchildren . The key to staying together is caring about each other as much as you care about your own happiness. Married life is a roller coaster. You share together , hold on and laugh a lot . Really simple, love and care about eachother 🙏
@vh86742 жыл бұрын
I always look nice no matter where I go. Especially going out with my hubby and his friends. I want to look nicer than other wives. We should take pride in how we look. Inside and outside.
@nicolemurphy26292 жыл бұрын
all i can say is read that back to yourself.
@judyclifford72382 жыл бұрын
I agree I have been married 40 years and I look nice everyday...I feel confident in myself and my husband always has a new girl everyday
@anonymousunknown34622 жыл бұрын
You want to look nicer than other wives? Why are you competing with other wives looks? What will happen if you they look nicer than you? What does their looks have to do with your marriage?
@sarahm85742 жыл бұрын
Same here, and nothing wrong with that.My mum and my sister both have amazing fashion sense so I suppose it runs in my family.I feel better when i look good ,and when i feel good I'm nicer to be around...
@markpitchford73752 жыл бұрын
@@anonymousunknown3462 She wants to make her husband look good and feel good among his peers. She'll remain married. WIll you?
@calmblueocean1177 Жыл бұрын
My spouse and I have been married 20+ years. Mutual respect, honesty and humour are key factors to a successful union. Yes, like any couple, we argue. If we weren’t honest, did not respect each other, or could not laugh to ease tension, then we simply wouldn’t be together.
@sgtigereye2 жыл бұрын
My husband and I have been together for 10 years, something I love about our relationship is that we continue to make each other laugh. His wittiness was what attracted me to him in the first place, wittiness takes intelligence. I think we challenge each other all the time with our come backs and ability to still make each other laugh.
@chiefswife12122 жыл бұрын
If you honestly believe he does not day dream about having his own life as an adult you're living in non reality
@sgtigereye2 жыл бұрын
@@chiefswife1212 ok Debbie Downer relax
@scotttabak67552 жыл бұрын
Until the wittiness zooms way over the head of your partner and all you hear is crickets
@awatson8832 Жыл бұрын
You're so fortunate. I love fun, humour, spontaneity, games, wit. So crucial. Be boring otherwise.
@idalily3810 Жыл бұрын
@@chiefswife1212 Huh? How does marriage prevent someone from having their own life? And what does that have to do with what the OP said? I'm confused.
@stoneyascension7250 Жыл бұрын
After 51 years of happy marriage I can attest to the wisdom of this man. He is wise & spot on!
@TamarAllen Жыл бұрын
I'm seeing JP speak tomorrow night, and I am having difficulty sleeping from the excitement of hearing him speak live. It feels like Christmas as a kid.
@happylatter-daysaint35032 жыл бұрын
My husband is ALWAYS honest about what I wear. I want his opinion & then I make my own decisions. He doesn't like my pink blouse with puffy sleeves, but I wear it anyway.👚😉 However, I don't wear it on our dates. I wear things that he loves to see me in. 🥰
@Jasiel.952 жыл бұрын
That’s so sweet! I kinda love you for that, you’re awesome. ❤️❤️
@happylatter-daysaint35032 жыл бұрын
@@Jasiel.95 My husband & I will celebrate 20 years of marriage this November. It hasn't always been easy, but we don't give up on each other. That's the key. Pray together & keep dating. It's tough sometimes, but it works. 🙏🏼😇
@Asdfgfdmn2 жыл бұрын
Women 🤦🏻♂️
@happylatter-daysaint35032 жыл бұрын
Women!! 💪😎
@Asdfgfdmn2 жыл бұрын
@@happylatter-daysaint3503 touchè
@davidr78722 жыл бұрын
I've been married for 38+ years and quite simply the best advice is to always put the OTHER persons best interest first. Obviously, you both have to do it. But you can't go wrong, I promise.
@geraldineheimy77482 жыл бұрын
I did that to my husband for 32 years and it’s not working and giving up.
@belottee2 жыл бұрын
I'm doing that to my husband of 24 yrs but its a one way thing. I want to be prioritized too. I'm not happy anymore. Can't leave because I'm still thinking what will happen to him if I leave him.
@leamaka20822 жыл бұрын
@david r. In theory, you’re right! However, some people’s personality is to always dominate and have the last word, hence an unbalanced relationship, then it doesn’t work, no matter how hard you try. You can trust me on that!
@maka32302 жыл бұрын
I disagree. You don't put others interests first if its at the expense of losing your sense of self. Some partners are selfish and just toxic.
@anabolicamv31002 жыл бұрын
@@geraldineheimy7748 You absolutely cannot stop.Listen, if you are truly devoting yourself like that to him he knows at least deep down so he wouldn't want to lose you. That means that the best thing you can do for him right now is to put your own interest in front, boldly. Also he probably has underlying reasons to act this way, make him comfortable opening up. This is the only way, unless the intimacy rules or other fundamental rules were broken.
@Shadislecrou2 жыл бұрын
My wife and I get along great and agree on almost everything. So we get to spend more time doing things that we both love, and less time disagreeing. He's spot on about scheduling time for sex, though. If it's important enough that it can end marriages, it's important enough to be a priority in your relationship.
@rvalerio77 Жыл бұрын
He is extremely interesting in his approach, articulating very complicated things in a way that is easy to follow and relate to. Life is complicated because human beings are multi-faceted and you can get along with someone in some areas but not so well in others. You have to find a way to get along with the other person without giving up being yourself.
@miriba86082 жыл бұрын
Thanks Jordan P. for bringing reality back into marriage.
@kathylovelady496 Жыл бұрын
Thanks!
@jiqbalg2 жыл бұрын
For healthy relationship I think one should get ready to be patient and tolerant under all circumstances. One should leave no bad impression in the memory
@shannonwilley52462 жыл бұрын
Having your input on marriage publicly.......may change the world one piece at a time. Its been so long since anyone defended marriage.......it almost became not cool to defend it. The most sacred thing on planet earth. Bravo JP!!!!!! Keep going.....you have an amazing platform. Why others have not taken the opportunity is stunning.
@bannedbycommieyoutube5time9202 жыл бұрын
Debate is good. Fundamental disagreements on values is a recipe for disaster.
@CaptainFights2 жыл бұрын
He’s a smart man and an amazing communicator. Listen to him.
@carmenrosario55392 жыл бұрын
Dr. Peterson, THANK YOU! My husband abandoned us years ago, when my 3 children were in college. We lost it all..including hope and trust in people. I send your videos every day to them. Thank you for being a father figure to my kids. They just love you! I am an evangelical Christian who prays for you and your family constantly. Faith in Jesus only, salvation , health and protection to you and your household. I love you like family, honestly I do. I can only pay with my prayers to the Soverign God. THANK YOU! ☆Please talk about dating in your 60s, loneliness is so sad and paralizing.
@bootsmade4walking2 жыл бұрын
May God bless you and your family! May your life be full of love and peace
@ianjones27312 жыл бұрын
Next time find a man who puts Jesus first never mix yokes. On the other hand don't let being single paralise you embrace it. I've been single and free for 10yrs I'd rather be single than get treated like shit.
@justinecamille74262 жыл бұрын
Sister, there is strength and comfort in The Lord Jesus. I pray for the Peace of God to cover you.
@Getitonwhenucan2 жыл бұрын
Same thing happened to me after 25 years shortly after I became disabled with a progressive disease... Only it was my wife that abandoned me and our 3 college aged kids, including a teen mom, plus our 1 year old grandson.
@ianjones27312 жыл бұрын
@@Getitonwhenucan She is devoid of a soul you're all better off without her.
@karenlubeck32943 ай бұрын
It takes two people who love each other, to be emotionally strong and flexible, and to remain determined to face life together daily. What Dr. Peterson point is there shouldn't be too much comfort in your relationship that you become bored. It is good to spar as its brings passion into a relationship. He means to spark discussion and bring each other's opinions out. Growth comes from differences of opinion, not necessary in your core values but in perspective about the world around you.
@anoopg70062 жыл бұрын
What makes people happy is being themselves. The more you be yourself, the happier you feel. You want to be in a relationship where the other person gets to be who they are in their essence. Same for you. Depending on where you are on your journey, you will attract relationships that will prompt you to be more of who you are and it's a flowing river through life experiences. If the idea is to skip heartbreak, you take enough time to be who you are to a considerable degree and then if you enter into relationship, you will be able to achieve more flow cuz you have achieved enough flow within yourself
@marthaanderson29672 жыл бұрын
Beautifully thought & written ! Authenticity , truth lead to good self esteem that flows over the toxic .
@blessedly4499 Жыл бұрын
The way Jordan & Tammy talk about their relationships is so beautiful, if only more romantic relationships were like this, the world would truly be a better place ❤️
@DrPatrickKingsep2 жыл бұрын
so true - to be authentic in a relationship or marriage and feel you can share your opinion and understand each other
@topper19582 жыл бұрын
Spot on. All engaged people need to see and hear this video.
@paulvantongeren27802 жыл бұрын
My summary: Find someone: 1. Based on attractiveness. Stay in shape, both parties 2. Someone who's interestingly different from you, but not so different that you can't communicate. A little bit of tension, trouble, mystery and combativeness. Keep your interest heightened, do not get bored. 3. Someone you can spar with, discuss your problems, get input and cognitive power. Someone you can trust and be open with. The ability to exchange opinions forthrightly and tell each other the truth. Someone that you can negotiate with a. tell you what they think and what they want b. continually update c. build a view of the future 4. Be romantic and intimate. Work at that. Make time for each other. You need to spend 90 minutes a week with your partner a. telling each other about your life b. what needs to be done to keep the household running c. mutually acceptable vision of next weeks or months d. spend intimate time together once a week or twice and that has to be negotiated
@sissi5598 Жыл бұрын
Excellent summary! Thank you so much!
@eugenejoseph7076 Жыл бұрын
After 40 years of marriage, we still argue, disagree, confront each other when its needed but we realized that these conflicts we discuss until a solution or agreement is reached are actually bricks we made to build a huge protective wall around our marriage that no evil could penetrate and we feel safe. BUT, one of my most important task in my life is to make her laugh out loud! I can never get enough of her giggles and laughter. Needless to say, we seldom argue anymore, but we're ready for a 'battle' anytime she lays the hammer down!!
@katiej55512 жыл бұрын
Thank God for you Dr.Peterson. Finally someone that makes sense. I always say “make it make sense” regarding politics or relationships and you do. I’m also a psychologist and you make me proud to be a psychologist!
@Lijericosas2 жыл бұрын
this man words are pure gold, the TECHNICAL TRUE at its best, you can just feel it
@ood298 Жыл бұрын
I think finding someone who understands what they are getting into is very important. Barely a year into mine, my partner went chatting with her ex after I told her not to do such and denied it even when the evidence was right before me. Words cannot express her denial and coupled with the fact that she is a professing Christian has given me trust issues. I have come to the conclusion that trust must be earned. The first point of trust is through their phone. If your to be partner or partner is very peculiar about their phone as if they work for the CIA, just forget it. Infidelity kills marriage and will forever kill it.
@mariatorres978911 ай бұрын
Well to be fair, they might not have feelings for each other at ask anymore, & he might just be a good friend at this point. Don't be so jealous. If she's having coffee, so what? If she wants to go drinking at the bar with him, dump her.
@DanielKoch-kw6fw10 ай бұрын
Hey beautiful.. we all need someone to love 💕 us more then we love not cheating 💔😢 on us.. my ex-wife was cheating on me so I head to call 🤙 for a divorce. That was 6yrs back.. how're you doing today.. and where are you from ..?
@susanhenderson33692 жыл бұрын
I have been married for 32 years. I have always wanted a level of emotional intimacy that my husband cannot provide. I'm not sure if he's unwilling or incapable. I discovered that if I wanted to stay married to him I was going to need to get my emotional needs met elsewhere so I have good (mostly women) friends. I could have run to someone else and had an affair. I could have divorced. My husband is a good man, though, and has always taken his responsibility to be there for and provide for our family seriously. He is always kind and good to me but I do have to tell him what I want. I have chosen to love him as he is rather than be dissatisfied with not having the type of deep conversations I thrive on. I focus on gratitude for the many good things he does for me and try to help him out as much as possible. We do negotiate and have had to work thru some pretty tough times. Having a shared religion (and believing in/accepting/conveying forgiveness and admitting our sins towards each other and not building up resentments) and worldview have been our glue. And his sense of humor. I'm not as happy as I could be if we had a deeper relationship but I am not unhappy either. I figured out a long time ago that my happiness is my responsibility. As someone who has suffered through some pretty severe depressions, I'm glad my husband stuck with me when I was hard to live with.
@jenniferroy2493 Жыл бұрын
This is the most emotionally and spiritually mature comment on here.❤
@brandydanielle65163 ай бұрын
I just learned how to use a feminine approach, myself. Us women tend to forget that we are emotional creatures and sometimes men need us to talk them through their emotions. I've struggled with this in my relationship bc he never opened up. I watched a few feminine videos and and sure enough I learned how to speak differently in a way that is more accepting and then when I started to open up he just opened right up too. We had a very emotional moment and I just listened. It was like he has never been able to open up to anyone before. Men need women and women need men. ❤
@sherparoyale Жыл бұрын
It’s really important to understand why you’re together and the lasting power of it, that can transcend time. Everything falls out from reminding yourself of that - love, communication, attractiveness, patience, debate, loyalty, roles and responsibilities, compromises, financials, intimacy - through thick and thin. About to hit 20 years and have had all variations of each.
@chrism3790 Жыл бұрын
You need - Someone who doesn't give up. - Someone who practices gratitude. - Possess the first two attributes yourself. That's really it. It's worked for me for the last 15 years.
@jeanninecausey Жыл бұрын
Have to let go of the expectation that as you get older your relationship with your spouse is always peaceful. Conflict is necessary to work things out. Learn to negotiate and fight well. Thanks, Dr. Peterson.
@idalily3810 Жыл бұрын
The best advice I can give is the advice my mother gave me: choose your partner wisely. Choose someone who is kind and responsible and thoughtful and loyal. So many people pay attention to all the wrong things. Sexual chemistry, good looks, these are the least important things to true love and lasting marriage.
@dwcoffey Жыл бұрын
Your mother is a wise woman!
@idalily3810 Жыл бұрын
@@dwcoffey She was, heaven bless her. She and my dad were great parents. I was truly blessed.
@destroyermaker Жыл бұрын
Sexual chemistry is a key component to making the hard times bearable
@svwerner2877 Жыл бұрын
I chose for wrong reasons. We have absolutely nothing in common. Been married 37 years. Our youngest is 21 still in college. I’m lonely. He also doesn’t like that I am a Christian. He wants nothing to do with God. Living as roommates. He is good with just not talking to me.
@destroyermaker Жыл бұрын
@@svwerner2877 The religion thing can work if you're both respectful of each other's beliefs
@FushiguroMegumi792 жыл бұрын
Healthy disagreements mean that you discuss and work out some sort of Compromise that is best for both parties. My dad always told me to never resort to name calling, and that advice has always stuck with me. Your ideal partner is someone you respect, so you should treat them with respect.
@LifeHacks_Central Жыл бұрын
Hey there! Great video title! It's so true that many people overlook this important factor when it comes to a happy marriage. The key ingredient we often forget about is effective communication. It's essential to openly and honestly express our thoughts, feelings, and needs with our partner. So, let's remember to keep those lines of communication open and flowing for a strong and thriving marriage. Awesome content, keep it up!
@2040431404 ай бұрын
This guy explained to me in < ~8 minutes what I truly needed (& have been seeking) to know vs. weeks of watching other YT vids.
@johncondon46472 жыл бұрын
Communication is a spectrum that ranges from combat (on one side) to communion (on the other). 'but' is on the combat side. 'and' is on the communion side. Both of which resembles a dance of sorts. Recognizing which province you are in is an important step towards harmony. The stereo of two minds working together on a problem is a wonder to behold and a joy to experience. .
@jasonrocksvegas2 жыл бұрын
Trying to find someone who isn't selfish is a momentous challenge. It all starts with yourself first.
@tellyhow62812 жыл бұрын
JBP does not run out of facts or opinion for any topic. He also has good pulmonary function. I have.not observed him huffing or puffing or turning blue from those long long statements. You're precious, JBP and it doesn't seem to go to your head. Like a doting uncle with an IQ way over 140 and EQ way above!
@KCapp2 жыл бұрын
The trouble I have with chronic truth telling is: to what end? If you are sharing your opinions you must have some aspirations for an actionable outcome… or, are you just releasing words to the universe? Practicing phonics? Testing out new vocabulary? If you frequently share your internal monologue and have some subconscious motivations to see it acted upon, I would argue some of these intentions convey as micro-managerial… controlling, even. The savvy communicator primes an audience for anticipated outcomes and is prepared to have those expectations refuted or otherwise runs a cost/benefit analysis and determines that losses outweigh gains.
@dbalgp10472 жыл бұрын
Word release and internal monologues don't seem to fit into the category of "truth" though. That seems to reduce the advice to "talk a lot and don't say false things while you're at it." There's a difference between telling the truth and going out of your way to deliver bad news. As a favor, could you rewrite your last sentence? I find it hard to parse.
@The__serpent.6.6.62 жыл бұрын
I Love U Mr Jordan Peterson. ❤️❤️ Thank U For The Lovely Advice As Always. It Helps With My Day To Day.
@rosemwright1958 Жыл бұрын
Jordon your love and respect for your wife speaks volumes on many levels of honesty and respect is what true love is. If those factors are not set in place, then it wont work, Your right a Husband and a wife or relationship should always be built on trust and respect, with unconditional love. If there is conditions with I do this for you, so then I expect it back from you, Will never work. Love is the main factor of what holds a marriage together and if one looks up love the definition is unconditional love is the key to a long lasting relationship. You and your wife have something very special and its nice to see how you don't have to pretend, and how you both share your inner most feeling and still look at eachothers imperfections and admire and respect and love for eachother is the key.
@tinylilmonster282 жыл бұрын
My Father always told me find a man you can still like as your friend when you find yourself in moments you can't bring yourself to love him. Friendship with your partner is more important than love. Love is a fleeting emotional response. Friendship takes effort every day.
@alchemenergyacademy62312 жыл бұрын
It’s more than just a good attribute to be honest. The only way we have true free agency is having the ability yo make an informed decision. There’s no way to do that without the honesty of others. (Unless one can read others minds.)
@spmoran47032 жыл бұрын
Dr Peterson. Is very down to earth . I dont agree with all he says . But, I agree with much he says .
@unchargedpickles637211 ай бұрын
I've noted myself and everyone in the comments seem to have these amazing long term relationships and I think it's literally because we care enough to look up and watch things like this and it helps maintain and have happy, loving relationships.
@SomeOne-mp6ym2 жыл бұрын
I totally agree Dr. Peterson! Most people don't understand that intelligent dialogue is essential. It's not about truth telling exactly..it's about being compatible in intelligence and interest.
@raohnniejackson85682 жыл бұрын
Trust is definitely one of, if not the most important components of a thriving relationship. The truth shall set you free.
@crazyleaf2572 жыл бұрын
Love it! If only we could have the courage to be so honest
@greyline1012 Жыл бұрын
I’m quite an indecisive person and to and fro about things, whilst on the other hand my partner is clear and concise and cuts through all the needless stuff I tend to worry about. We just work! After over 25 years we couldn’t be happier. I still get that lovely feeling in my stomach when I hear his car door close and know he’s home. We communicate great and always make time for each other. That works for us and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
@JuliaPedro Жыл бұрын
I look forward to having that after 25 years of marriage. It means we both partnered with God to do things right.
@gregnixon12962 жыл бұрын
I asked a friend once who had been married 40 years how she made the relationship last so long. She said, “Don’t get divorced.”
@kingdomassettv Жыл бұрын
Wow, this is deep
@lusianacaucau9094 Жыл бұрын
😅
@johndummy337011 ай бұрын
You'd better take note ladies, with most of women initiating divorce these days us men are about done with marriage, It's almost a thing of the past.
@verenamaharajah60828 ай бұрын
That doesn’t sound like a happy/good relationship, it sounds like they barely tolerate one another. In my experience of the world, there are actually very few genuinely happy marriages, most people just tolerate one another. I always told my children, living with another person is HARD, even if you really love each other. Far too many people marry out of lust ~ the thing you really need for a good marriage is that you should both LIKE each other first. Look out for people who only pretend to like you~ that kind of mask can be difficult to see past, so remember this……. Love isn’t what you say, it’s what you do. And if someone does bad things to you, they are not good marriage material so end it before you get trapped.
@gregnixon12968 ай бұрын
@@verenamaharajah6082 The message of “Don’t get divorced” Is don’t be quick to give up.
@hanlie4072 жыл бұрын
oh man. my husband is Dutch, and they are so brutal when it comes to telling the truth. As first i struggle until i learn also to say what's on my mind.
@deonrobbertse44942 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your teachings Internet Dad!
@samplautz5586 Жыл бұрын
I think one thing that helps is to thank each other, even for the smallest things that you do everyday like the laundry. I’m not in a relationship but I try to do that at work, when a manager has to swipe their badge to approve a routine thing that they will do 50 times a day. I think them everytime, letting them know that their work is appreciated
@Maggieismydog Жыл бұрын
You need to encourage each other and make each other feel safe to speak openly. Never make your partner feel alone, through any situation, even when you are angry or mad with one another. Excellent video and excellent advice, thank you sir!
@kattabdallah70272 жыл бұрын
I’ve been married to my husband for nearly 23 years. We’ve been separated for some time now contemplating divorce. We love each other deeply, but drifted apart due to some infidelity and addiction with underlying childhood emotional trauma. Dr. Peter son’s videos have given me hope for forgiveness and the ability to finally heal and move forward and get the life and love we deserve once again.
@gaborzaborszky50642 жыл бұрын
Good luck.
@culturecoroner2 жыл бұрын
I’ll pray for you and your husband today. ❤
@kattabdallah70272 жыл бұрын
@@culturecoroner Thank you 😊
@BS-dq1kz2 жыл бұрын
Hope things are going well for you no matter how things worked out.
@kalel0192 Жыл бұрын
Nobody wins if you end it. You can both win if you do. Do it.
@Razear2 жыл бұрын
"You're gonna let the erotic element of your life die?" Yes, that's how infidelity traditionally begins. Someone finds their sex lives at home unsatisfactory, can't express that frustration to their partner or their partner won't acknowledge it, and then they go off to have a secret affair behind their backs.
@sarahrobertson6342 жыл бұрын
That's not how marriage is supposed to work. What is supposed to happen is the person with the higher sex drive learns how to control themselves, and how to be less needy. Jordan seems a bit light in his loafers in this clip. That feminine leg cross is interesting.
@BeaverTail402 жыл бұрын
@@sarahrobertson634 it sounds like your saying the person with the higher sex drive should suppress their natural desire to mate with their partner. Does that seem healthy to you? Im not saying infidelity is the solution. I just wonder if the sex drive of one partner is much more intense then that of the other, a compromise on BOTH ends must be met unless the relationship is doomed to leave one side unfullfilled.
@sarahrobertson6342 жыл бұрын
@@BeaverTail40 Self control is a beautiful thing, my friend. Compromise isn't a good option, since coercive sex is abuse. One partner being abused so the other can feel fulfilled is hardly a healthy pattern in a marriage. Sex is a luxury, not a necessity, and should be treated as such. Feeling unfulfilled is never an issue to one who has learned self control. A true compromise might be for the partner with the lower drive to support a meditation practice for the partner with the higher drive, with self-mastery as the goal. Meditating together is an amazing bonding experience for a couple. That way, sex can happen naturally, with no addictive, abusive, or demanding behavior on the part of the higher drive partner. Works great!
@RyonLION2 жыл бұрын
@@sarahrobertson634 Thank you! You are the only person I have seen bring up his feminine leg cross. I'm more of resting the ankle on the knee type of guy and never understood the whole leg cross thing. Also, thanks for mentioning the sex drive compromise with self-mastery as the goal. Makes sense
@sarahrobertson6342 жыл бұрын
@@RyonLION No, thank you Ryon. I'm all about meditation and self-mastery. No man actually wants his wife to give them reluctant, coerced duty sex. It turns him into a sex offender and is sexually abusive to his wife, and is really just gross and unsatisfying. Why abuse your wife only to be unsatisfied in the end anyway? Everybody loses. That's the "compromise" that a lot of guys settle for, but genuine female sexual desire is so much better. A man who is the master of his sex drive will have his wife climbing all over him, all creamy and wet. Everyone wins. Also, I cringe when I see men cross their legs at the knee. That's how I sit. Sometimes if I'm doing seated yoga during a work meeting or something I cross my ankle on the knee. It's a yoga pose that's called "Seated Figure 4". I'm a Tantric Yoga enthusiast.
@driveagoodmanbad6422 жыл бұрын
Jordan Peterson is a maddening combination and this version is what keeps me coming back…
@justindtackett2 жыл бұрын
Maybe someone can benefit from this. I’ve been married for 8 years and I’ve been attracted to two other women in that time. Let me start by saying that I knew in the moment those women didn’t matter. And also nothing ever came of either of them and I was honest with my wife as well. What I knew was going on but still could t help it was that I desired attention. I didn’t feel like I was getting that attention from the one woman I wanted it from so badly. We both work and have kids. So naturally, when I got attention from another woman who I found good looking, it was huge!!! It woke up that part of me that had been starving. Now I didn’t excuse my self with that in mind and I’m still married because I know what God says about marriage and above all I will honor him with my marriage and ask for forgiveness for my end of things. But I still have yet to work this out totally. And this video helped. Jordan P is such a great asset to our western world.
@virginiarush8541 Жыл бұрын
I'm sure your wife has found other men attractive during your marriage, and has given no thought to it. Stay focused on your wife and stop focusing on who may give you some attention, because you will stumble if your heart isn't in the right place.