THE MOST C̵͖̅U̵̦͛R̵̝͌S̸̜̃Ḙ̶̕D̴̟̊ OF r/CURSEDCOMMENTS

[@manicsandwich5714]

The fact he says things like “balls deep in an Oompa Loompa” but bleeps out the word ass makes this so much funnier

[@Vsevolodbochkov]

I wish i was was that oompa loompa

[@bhamoel]

"Oompa Loompa doopadie dee, Please get that fucking thing outta me." 💀

[@balls_gaming]

Nah its because youtube doesnt allow swear

[@TommyKJgaming]

@@Vsevolodbochkov same

[@Am_burger_dude]

​@@bhamoel omg I burst out laughing

[@JadeyCatgirl99]

35:10 "We just have a queen that doesn't die." Yeah, uh, about that

[@Anigaming-dz5gh]

Aged badly

[@_honeymilkboba_]

About that…😅

[@sasvkeee._]

oh crumpets 😰

[@HJKL-hu1ny]

How funny would it have been if she died exactly when Schlatt said he reckons it will happen?

[@hey-im-kat]

that did not age well...

[@thebigbingus8624]

So here's mine; It's quite similar to the one at 41:26. Context: Thanksgiving dinner, extended family is present. For some reason, my older cousin thought it would be funny to tell 8 year old me that "spanking the monkey" is slang for taking a dump. So after our family dinner, I asked my mom in front of my whole family "May I be excused? I need to go spank the monkey." To this day, there is not a single thanksgiving that goes by without someone mentioning the incident. Thanks Adam.

[@nn_eptun8602]

I love stories where it's teaching little kids about slangs with wrong definition and then they get embarrassed and everyone won't stop talking about it

[@Boicapof_Chronicles.]

Damn, Adam really ruined SOMETHING

[@adanessethesixthadanesseth9816]

Damien actually has a really good Kermit impression.

[@JJ-117.]

On god, I thought that was edited

[@jacobcox4565]

0:01 For anyone actually curious about the lizard she's holding, it looks a Tegu. Tegus are basically if Monitor Lizards were omnivorous and had big jowls like a Green Iguana. Edit: The Tegu's name is MacGuyver and he has his own channel that's mostly videos of him being doted on by his owner.

[@fevre_dream8542]

And they're quite smart. Not great pets unless you really know what you're doing with reptiles though. I see a lot of bigger lizards (iguanas, monitors, tegus) die young because their owners don't care for them properly.

[@ghostfoxfan207]

huh didn't know what that was but now i know thanks for the neat fact.

[@SalahMohamed-v5f]

​@@fevre_dream8542I thought you were gonna say Asians again

[@nathanGC__]

35:24 I guess she didn't stand a chance against Schlatt's karate moves

[@internetexplorer144p]

oh god

[@ahhh844]

omg when I heard that I immediately had to go look it up and was relieved it wasn't november 25th

[@MxSteelscale]

agreed

[@Overblots]

I was not responsible for what happened September 8, 2022-Jschlatt

[@hypardt9525]

@@ahhh844 he was delayed a few mouths so that he could have a meeting with techoblade

[@jankyplanes]

I remember sitting down with popcorn and soda last year when they made their last compilation. this time I think they put in so much effort to find the best ones. good job guys!

[@Estfireemblem]

I thought it said giggle giggle at the end

[@n0tstyy]

who else has this as their favorite subreddit?

[@ahahhaahhahaahahahahahaquitted]

Me! (:

[@St4rS4ilor]

Me

[@prodbytarantino]

I stg😭😭

[@Noelleiscute]

Me. Alongside f***uinparticular, crappydesign, and TIHI

[@GooberThe4th]

No absolutely not

[@Broly_TheMetroidFan]

10:12 I love Robin's response to 'the piss drawer'.

[@TemnotaVoronya1243]

3:02 "Will not be including photos", that implies that you do have photos

[@talya-adelegrumberg1722]

this deserves to be on the sub redit

[@VidGirl88]

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT try to drink anything while watching this. The commentary, so good yet so evil.

[@sunsetparkslasher7921]

I wish I read this approximately 6 minutes earlier than I did

[@donkeyhobo34]

I'm in love with you

[@Lizzoncker]

@@donkeyhobo34 how old are you

[@ignatiusquietus]

Why was I reading this AFTER I drank and spilled my coffee???

[@mrgta-cj6wx]

JOKES ON YOU I DID HA

[@zrc1514]

35:16 Schlatt expedited his plan.

[@MeerkatDragonheart]

I do miss Damien Really happy he came back for those few specials But really sad he had to go for good Will never hear another like him

[@deotexh]

What happened about him?

[@MeerkatDragonheart]

@@deotexh Nothing, he just moved on when the EmKay team found their new narrators, Damien still has his own channel and discord where he still does reddit readings, just not with EmKay anymore

[@deotexh]

@@MeerkatDragonheart Oh okay ^^

[@legthepeg]

I miss Technoblade :(

[@aleeyaarini2306]

@@legthepeg what?

[@luckyilyducky]

36:46 "How did you sneak out at night with those things clappin'?" That was the funniest reddit reply I have ever seen

[@EdgyShooter]

Damien has to be my favourite narrator, not too much overthinking or killing the jokes, just having a bunch of fun and laughing his arse off 😂

[@streetpunkstreams4730]

I find Robin to be very physically attractive. It's the confidently shaming posters for his own reading errors that kills it 😂

[@amandaharl946]

im aro/ace but I agree

[@mincrafterzatplay2842]

WTF

[@lizflessert2427]

@@mincrafterzatplay2842 What’s wrong with that?

[@seriousvcat]

@@amandaharl946 wtf does that even mean

[@firesprite8959]

@@amandaharl946is that you’re whole personality

[@RealKingCRK]

Please tell me all the emkay narrators all live in same house, it'd be so funny to see Lexi and Robin feud on which is better between cats and meese

[@ZerglingLover]

meese as in mouse or moose?

[@RealKingCRK]

@@ZerglingLover moose

[@ZerglingLover]

@@RealKingCRK If i had to choose a pet, cat would be the obvious choice, but if i had to choose a fighter, a moose is enough to scare away 99.9% of animals. They’re basically miniature hippos.

[@RealKingCRK]

@@ZerglingLover they can't really scare off wolverines, wolverines are like honey Badgers on crack

[@ZerglingLover]

@@RealKingCRK thats why i didnt say every animal

[@Just_a_commenter]

Some of these cursed comments are going to live rent free in my head, and honestly. I think I can live with that. Also, been a minute since I heard Damien's voice! Nice to hear them on the mic again c:

[@87Event]

goofy is a cow litterally

[@lunar_moth777]

At this point might as well say it

[@87Event]

@@lunar_moth777 pluto (or pludo) is a dog, cows can have whiskers of some sort too

[@minaashido518]

you stay rent free in my head too

[@minaashido518]

@skylarsworld9477pokemon vore

[@Uuuuummmm69420]

Robin:"what's wrong with Schlatt?" Personally, i think everything is wrong with "Schlatt"

[@CreepersNeedHugs]

39:47 for those unaware, "le chat" means "the cat." That is the basis of this joke.

[@BuiHieuDong]

0:27 That's actually an unimaginably painful death.

[@stevegu6377]

whats an oompa loompa

[@Hi-bc4kt]

@@stevegu6377 Seriously? Istg if you're not joking...

[@ahahhaahhahaahahahahahaquitted]

@@stevegu6377 how do you not know what a oompa loompa is?

[@minigunnathaniel]

0:34 this is what they are ​@@stevegu6377

[@zerrierslizer1]

"teen left with knife stuck in her face after being robbed" damn, must be one of those magical teleporting knives that leave no trace of it's puncture point when it teleports from the left side of the face to the right.

[@anya665]

Coulda been pics from different phones, or one may have been in front mode while the other was from the back. Hard to be sure but there are obvious explanations too

[@zerrierslizer1]

@@anya665 look closely at the pictures, and you'll see that i am right about it being fake as can be.

[@Roll_for_Chaos]

@@zerrierslizer1 its either fake or its from the angle change.

[@zerrierslizer1]

@@Roll_for_Chaos nah, it's fake. found out like 4 months ago.

[@leep3261]

if being cute was a crime, id be released of all charges

[@ItzEllaCookiePlayz]

if being cute was a crime, Id have a life sentence! 🌸🍡✨

[@scp-phenomenon014]

@Kyledevon Nightcore if being cute was a crime i would be a law abiding citizen watching you get arrested on the news

[@unserhumanorandom6224]

if being cute was a crime,id had a life sentence for murdering multiple people at a nazi convention

[@ItzEllaCookiePlayz]

@@unserhumanorandom6224 what is nazi convention I’m 9

[@unserhumanorandom6224]

@@ItzEllaCookiePlayz party

[@lisadoherty8573]

3:50 (rewind a bit) not if you're home alone

[@godhelp7535]

0:54 nah bro thats uncles job

[@shamrockers4744]

Wut?

[@godhelp7535]

@@shamrockers4744 its said "mothers dont teach their daughters to suck dick thats daddys job" i said its uncles job because uncles are known on the internet to be pedophiles and weird. hope that helps but the fact someone is dumb enough to not understand it is astounding.

[@Deleted_Eevee]

3:56 notice how the knife is in a different spot in each picture

[@lilywise2489]

these videos never disappoint! very entertaining.

[@stellleo]

19:32 I can't decide whether to feel sorry or happy about the fact that he got a "gift".

[@bluedemon8486]

15:50 They shared.

[@lamelime1]

oh god

[@lamelime1]

r/cursedcommentscursedcomments

[@Banded_]

That was a yummy snack.

[@shamrockers4744]

​@@Banded_ Pretty nutty too.

[@-Commit-arson-]

47:02 actually, Voldemort is afraid of death so he inflicts it on other people because he thinks it’s the worst thing he can do

[@whatafoolbelieeeeves]

11:52 that godforsaken scream

[@kieravermeal9127]

The fact I clicked on this, then got an ad a second after it plays is HILARIOUS. You gave me a perfectly cut scream. Thank you

[@whatafoolbelieeeeves]

@@kieravermeal9127 no worries i think

[@a_random_youtuber6151]

I dont know why, but Robin sounded like a character dying in the LEGO Star Wars: The Complete Saga.

[@wantedbird55srandomchannel28]

*UAAUGH*

[@darkcrydotmrihavetoomanyst1440]

The fact that schlatt accidentally predicted the queen would die is oddly funny

[@JoshSweetvale]

She was, like, 100

[@uranian-Umbra]

And the date was suspiciously close

[@piggyplayzyt9084]

4:06 The way Damien narrated that part tho 🤣

[@CharybdisM0ns]

43:05 "That's not a nose, Charlie!" laughed myself to tears! 🤣

[@CreepersNeedHugs]

20:14 In some places, that was patched!

[@abyss7343]

35:05 that aged well..

[@automation7295]

Everything people say tend to never age well. What TommyInnit said clearly didn't aged well, UK lost their queen in '22.

[@mqgawario8722]

8:47 Looks like Yoshikage Kira was busy.

[@YasashiNoKage]

I hope most of them were from women

[@tatystextingstory1269]

I posted the speech then scrolled down to find this

[@Zequintiny]

I like how the voices change after the ad break. It's like a brief intermission between performances at a show.

[@justthinkingthoughts]

the last one killed me, and the cut out was JUST PERFECT

[@amelielollz]

1:55 my cousin just began screaming when he said " Kyaaa! " and it just sounded like he just screamef

[@Dargon818]

1:03 WTF IS THIS JOE SWANSON?!

[@Local_idk]

21:52 The innocent kid yells “F***!”

[@rasazy5441]

Yes

[@notmatty2263]

3:15 I've heard this joke before just with a different Jack with Jack Black

[@Expertato555]

13:02 I think PhoenixSC has a solution.

[@angelogaray8019]

42:16 WHY WAS THAT SUCH A GOOD IMPRESSION

[@Han_Solo6712]

8:02 isn’t actually that cursed, it’s just misinterpreted. The ice cream man pretty much gave little Timmy a job offer. If he helps him serve other customers, he’ll get ice cream for free.

[@jackdesanta69]

15:17 that´s how creepers were invented...

[@theinternalrevenueservicei6121]

Hearing Kermit refusing VC torture was.... not what I thought I'd be doing at 0153 EST

[@tristan_ellis]

4:26 Nala (I think)

[@YasashiNoKage]

Yes, she is

[@tristan_ellis]

@@YasashiNoKage bingo (its been a while)

[@TheRealArtimusKnight]

Robin, Lexi, and Damien are my reddit reading holy trinity

[@strawberryduck3080]

Frfr

[@notarobot1231]

Yep. The Queen thread aged *super* well…

[@bladeonblitz9281]

5:34 quick correction. that isn't Vishnu, that's Shiva. i can see how u got them mixed up, but to remember which is which, remember that Lord Shiva is the one who has the, let's call it a trident for now, behind him or next to him, and the 3rd eye on the center of his forehead.

[@NeedTherapyUrgently]

Ah damn it i also it was vishnu, they both look really similar

[@YourOnlyHero]

Yesss!!! Its Damien!!! I love the rest of the cast but this guy is the greatest of them all

[@bluebird6004]

17:38 Forgive me god for what I am about to do this photo.

[@Banded_]

Yummy.

[@aubreypotter96]

To both of you but excuse me but WTF

[@m0thborne]

You know what, I’m just going to say it. The moment at 48:27 convinces me that Robin would be a great anime voice actor.

[@rinsatsuki3374]

12:48 Don't worry Robin, I've heard it's a joke ending in a visual novel.

[@Sebispine]

35:20 this did not age well

[@Ramsey276one]

5:44 [types in PANIK] I MENANT XD

[@gr0ss3r0wy]

19:14 WOAH WOAH-

[@Sir_Pentious3234]

Ok ​@dzgk

[@mega_micro]

25:39 Congratulations, you found all seven notebooks!

[@this_dude3881]

Now all you need to do is... G̵̛̦͎̪͔͖̗̖̻̜̩̗̊͛͒̈̈̽́̓̂̎͘͘͜E̸̡̦͉͔̝͙͗͑̃̐͊̋͐ͅT̵͚̙̳͙̹͖̒̓͊̍̇͌̓͐̃̉͘͝ ̴̹͉̥̦̬͌O̴̧̭̤̹͆Ü̵̡̗̤͖͚͕̯̠͓͖͇̭̔T̶̨͕̪̱͍̝̘͚͋͊͑͊͗̀̄͊͗͂̓̊͑̿͝ ̴̛̰̙͓̣͕̝̪̘̩̼̥Ẁ̸̢͉̬̼̣͖̫̠̼͍̬̤̹̩̞͋̄͂Ḧ̴̹͙́̍͆̆͒̔̓͑̇̽͘Ì̷̙̇͐͑͋͐̋͐̈̒͘Ļ̸̛̱͕͎̮̘͓̩̩͒̎̒͗̏͆̕ͅĘ̵̧̛͙͔̯̣̘̲͖́͌́̏̿̔̉ͅ ̶̧̫͙̳̓̎́͂̽͌͋̽̔̿̑̐̕̚Y̸̨̧̢̛͓̙̙͓̫̣̝̌̎͋͛̽͐̃̅̔̏͠Ó̸͕̭̙̥̮̖̯̣͜Ü̷̧͖͚͈͉͈̝̣̲͊̌̈́̒́ ̴̬̾̒S̸̬̳̙͈̈́̾́ͅT̶̨̧̧̪̬͔̗̳̺͓̳̘̉̒͗̑̌̌̏̄̔̈́͆̚͝I̷̧̬̤̍̈́̐͒̈́̐͌̑͝L̵̪̼͔̰̭̫̥̐̒̽͑̾́͐͒͊̀L̶̛͉̎̓͐̂͝ ̸̢̢̛̱̼̯̪͙̭̞̰̞̽̅̅́̔͐́̔̈̀͂̉̚͘C̷̻̝͓̠͈̞̞̗̯̀̍Ä̸̧͕͚͉͓̜͎͇̫͙̪́̎̏̐̔̑͑̌̆̈̈́̿̔͝Ń̸͉͗͑͌̋͐͊͝͝!̴̞̥͚̱͈̭͉͖͎̪̲̣͊̽̾̑̈́̇!̵̛̬̻̙̬̞̞̲̟̝͙̗̅͑̊̆͘͝͝ͅ Hahah! >:D

[@danielferrieri7434]

My Favorite Series on this Channel

[@donaldmoxham2659]

34:59 "When it's black, fight back" Ah yes, the police officer motto.

[@rroes7319]

The "gtfo" is actually a bad idea. Bears run fast. Bears well false charge you. But they will chase you.

[@ChildDevourer83]

25:56 gotta get egg whites somehow

[@thelolminecrafter7830]

25:42 ....Alright then. Guess the Heresy layer is now canonically located in Oregon.

[@CoffeeHype7356]

THIS VIDEO STARTS OFF WITH A BANG

[@NikitaSommerfeld]

1:31: Humans are renewable........ Well.......that sounds exactly the like german logic 70 years ago to me.

[@mathguy37]

0:13 there are actually 45 types however to some people it’s more, particularly 46 and maybe even 47

[@LucreciaCrescentIsBestGirl]

Me: takes a warm bath to unwind after a long day The shoppers in the bathroom section at Home Depot: 11:52

[@alexmcconaghy3523]

11:50 I started wheezing and the scream 🤣

[@ericgolightly8450]

1:17 Let me correct that: The meat is the robotics, and the organs are the electronics. The skin is the armor. The skeleton is still a skeleton, the structure itself. The brain is the AI it runs on, the heart is the power plant.

[@voidboiyt]

41:36 GLAD TO SEE SOMEONE ELSE SUFFERED THE *SAME FATE*

[@thesalmonguy3342]

For the starting one: the lizard that they’re actually referring to is called a “red Argentina tegu” think of doggo but with scales instead of fur, that’s basically what they are

[@吕俊-e4b]

19:07 I can't help but think 'screwmate'

[@吕俊-e4b]

42:28 on the left there is a very questionable position between two bears

[@CertifiedElite420]

23:48 oh, yeah! The kids love that place!

[@sisig2419]

Technoblade never dies

[@patrickkeichigamboa1751]

Technoblade never dies

[@HenryDenry]

Technoblade never dies

[@BlazeFiresoul]

TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES!

[@TVOverlord_F_Alastor]

Technoblade never dies!!

[@tulsipa7092]

31:30 *"invasion for the shreckle"*

[@SteamCheese1]

As an Asian the first one absolutely sent me.... dying here 🤣

[@Galaxy-Man]

I have a question, do asians see in widescreen?

[@ОлегШулаев-э7й]

@@Galaxy-Man 💀

[@DanialDEcool]

48:35 The reason actually is : The Great War was the first name. A few years later, it was renamed “The World War” and then it wasn’t singular because basically the same people fought again later, so because there was now 2 world wars, they made World War 1 and World War 2. (It’s funny because the First World War indirectly caused the second one, hitler is drafted, almost is killed at the end of the war. Germany was placed in absolute shambles at the end too.)

[@michaelszollosi642]

16:16 Dexter DeShawn after the pickup: You got some balls mr V

[@Molli2324]

24:36 Funny thing is, they really did that with a bunch of German KZbinrs. Its a project that is called 7 vs WIld. 7 Days in the woods of Sweeden in Season one.

[@memeboi18]

The person at 1:43 just described the average high school boys locker room

[@ElijahLothrop]

4:44 MR SQUIDWARD! GET BACK TO WORK!

[@gaykirby198]

38:21 dolphins are also rapists and kill and torture other animals for fun :3

[@merterenacar14]

0:08 The laugh... I can't stand the laugh... PPP- HAHAHAHA

[@DanG425]

25:24 oh he was 100% hacking, he later brought himself back to life

[@admiralensin.]

Nah that was a new game

[@MaximNightFury]

I love that Robin just... screamed with the mayo one, it actually broke me for a moment

[@Hamzerio]

27:11 new fear unlocked!

[@nazarostrovsky_]

15:58 poor poor Koichi 😢

[@pianoenthusiast2054]

9:23 Koichi, you truly are a reliable guy.

[@Emmett_Br0wn]

3:32 AHAHHAHHAHAAA

[@ahahhaahhahaahahahahahaquitted]

Finally another one I could binge watch on (:

[@CasuallyIncredible]

9:14 Just imagine if the closed the entrance with the kids still inside.

[@T3H_C0SM1C_SP4RT4N]

3:33 "Ill never give you the secrets" - Kermit the Frog

[@AugustRiversJr]

Jumpscared by the name "two mad" appearing in this video because he literally just died

[@OfficialTurnipUp]

This video was 1 year ago TwoMad died on February 13, 2024.

[@AugustRiversJr]

@OfficialTurnipUp ...yeah? That's my point. I just happened to watch it the day he passed and was surprised by the coincidence

[@OfficialTurnipUp]

@@AugustRiversJr Ah, my bad. Sorry

[@formallyeastyt1167]

10:40 "Dead Silence activated."

[@nutsi3]

5:42 out of context???

[@Lasagnadisliker]

45:40 I was going to sleep tonight but I guess not

[@mstrmm35]

17:29 This genuinely made my day better

[@FinnyTheFoxX]

45:32 u just summoned a big chunk of the capcut fandom.

[@mrtadtail2111]

54:22 I haven't seen this mentioned yet, but I'd like to point out that someone is actively undoing this man's belt

[@scp-phenomenon014]

wait what the hell 💀

[@jamesfassold]

WHA

[@crowofjudgement8810]

They are holding onto his belt not undoing it