The most unhinged 7th Heaven episodes

I decided to rewatch 7th Heaven. These are some of my recaps for the most absurd episodes I’ve seen.
Episode List, in order of the recaps
S1 E13 “America’s Most Wanted” Mary steals a glass
S3 E8 “No Sex, Some Drugs, and a Little Rock n’ Roll” Mary takes energy boosters
S2 E7 “Girls Just Want to Have Fun” Karen is a local gang member
S4 E10 “Who Nose?” Simon gets caught up with paint huffers at school
S1 E10 “Last Call For Aunt Julie” Aunt Julie the alcoholic comes to visit
S4 E7 “Sin” Simon is caught using the middle finger at school
S2 E5 “Says Who?” Lucy tries to catch a bulimic girl
S2 E4 “Who Knew?” Mom admits to smoking pot
S2 E20 “Like a Harlot” Matt asks the school harlot to the prom
S2 E12 “Rush To Judgment” Lou has been hiding a secret autistic son
S5 E9 “Tunes” Norton slaps Lucy’s butt and Simon wears baggy pants
S2 E19 “Time to Leave the Nest” Simon brings a homeless girl home to keep as a pet
S3 E5 “And a Nice Chianti” Matt’s car is stolen by a pregnant teen carjacker
S6 E10 “Consideration” Simon is involved in a slow speed car chase

[@toriladybird511]

Reminder the Pastor Dad in real life was an actual guy you would NEVER want near your kiddos.

[@gojewla]

He had that vibe on those shows. If I were ever to come up with a stereotypical vision of a child predator, it would be him!

[@AlishaOutridge]

​@gojewla maybe that's what made him perfect for the job of being a pastor on the show

[@bingleberryboo8685]

I saw him in real life out with a very young girl. People said it was his niece. Either way. There were weird vibes.

[@michelleelmore5533]

I can’t understand how this show is even being shown on tv still after it coming about the actor being an admitted pediphile.

[@erickamorgan4564]

Yet they stuck it to Cosby!

[@chris-tinav4852]

“ aren’t you a predator” “ didn’t you touch kids” “I think someone needs to take a look at your hard-drive”😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@alexakearney]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@GG_Booboo]

I was rolling throughout!🤣🤣🤣

[@kayla7562]

🤮

[@XDeathwingSilenceX]

😂😂😂

[@jb-zg2lo]

I have viewed this too many times for those exact zingers

[@Megan-nt7dm]

Christian media is so hillariously out of touch with reality, its supposed to be serious and moralistic and just comes out so ridiculous you cant help but laugh

[@fpengelbrecht9314]

Correction WASP Christian media 🙋🏼‍♂️😂😂😂😂

[@glgl1472]

@@fpengelbrecht9314 ok Felicia

[@fpengelbrecht9314]

@@glgl1472 oh lighten up 😂🙈

[@lisah8438]

This show is not considered a Christian show though. It just has a pastor in it.

[@cheesewithxbread]

​@@lisah8438 it's considered a Christian show, that's what the show producer and writers wanted.

[@Throatzillaaa]

The way that they forced that alcoholic aunt to be shut up in a room to detox is literally so dangerous. There are certain substances that you really need to be careful detoxing from, if you are a serious addict.

[@spikefivefivefive]

Detox requires medical intervention.

[@teesh871]

They opened up liquor stores so people wouldn't detox too quickly during covid as like...essential business. She needed diazepam and iv thiamine.

[@Super_Grover_]

Yeah 10 years ago, a good friend of mine decided to quit drinking alcohol cold turkey. 30 hours in to detoxing at home, he had a severe seizure that left him with brain damage, unable to walk, and he nearly died. He was 27 at the time. He’s lived in an assisted living facility ever since.

[@arura5124]

Fun fact! Alcohol withdrawal is by far the most dangerous form and most likely to be fatal. Good job 7th Heaven 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@Super_Grover_]

@@arura5124 yeah… sooooooo FUN! 🙄

[@Dariusvoice]

The shots he’s taking at Stephen Collins every chance he gets kills me. I love it 🤣 “Shouldn’t you be in jail?”, 🤣☠️

[@Amanda-ex6em]

my personal favorite is "and be poor" as to the all the lessons learned

[@SalahEddineH]

I love the "And I really think someone should... take-a-look-at-your-hard-drive." I love how in the recommended tab next to this video, I had a true crime video from Dreading about Stephen Collins. KZbin algorithm is like "In case you need some context, that's a Baaad Man".

[@steveneptun7580]

My favorite was the comment about Chris Hansen

[@DavidRoxxzzzzz]

Lmao I thought I was the only one

[@truko5039]

My favorite is “Yes, officer. This man right here!” Because of what the Dad said earlier. Especially knowing about his exploits with teens.

[@annjay2581]

"I brought 7 kids into this world, I can take one out" spoken like a true pro-lifer lol

[@shadywiskerz]

She really threatened to kill a kid 😂

[@rosegroshek1218]

Not really sure what that is supposed to mean... Because I've heard plenty of parents say something like that, it has nothing to do with being pro-life or not.

[@AndreaHa]

@@rosegroshek1218 it was a joke. But yeah, a lot of parents have said it lol

[@millennialodyssey5956]

Pretty sure pro choicers live by that mantra. I mean that is exactly what abortion does.

[@millennialodyssey5956]

​@@AndreaHa that was a joke? It sucked.

[@jennigthatonecrazydoglady8100]

The way “I’ve been huffing, you dumb virgin” has been living nonstop at the forefront of my mind 💀

[@letitbeenow]

😭😭😭

[@kelseycarlile9704]

😂😂😂😂

[@MATRICULAT3D]

7th Heaven was never about Christianity or religion it was a “television programming” show created to mock people who serve “The Truth”. There were absolutely no true servants/disciples ever on any “television programming show” that is presented to us by the mainstream “entertainment programming industry”. I think you people lack comprehensive understanding and critical thinking skills to understand that these “television programming shows” have “actors/actresses” who play fictitious roles from a script. 7th Heaven is not Christian media but rather “Hollywood Entertainment Industry”. You really think the system network that controls broadcasting would ever actually allow real true Christian to be shown to the world on their “controlled brainwashing networks” televised for you people to actually see and hear.? The joke is on you week feeble minded people who are trapped cornered and scared and you don’t know your own reality/existence and most of you believe you are upside down spinning on a water world ball. 😂😂😂😂.

[@emmathompson7706]

One huff too many is killing me 😅

[@Gloriomono]

😂😂😂 Honestly, I would watch a reboot of that show, if it was instead told from the perspective of the other students, neighbours etc. Just reflecting on the weird almost-homeschool kids and their nosy parents 😅😅 Like a big mockumentary tell-all from the poor people affected by their bullshit.

[@gillian2325]

omg that would be so good!!

[@gateauxq4604]

10/10 would watch

[@lucaleone4331]

I would watch it if it was like his last clip in this video. Of all the kids in therapy and each episode is them reflecting on a stupid moment that scarred them lol

[@Gloriomono]

@Luca Leone 🙌 YES! A Tell-All from the kids in the stile of some cult-documentary. Those are so in right now, it would be perfect timing 😅😅😅😅😅

[@lauracoutinho5478]

Nah they didn't home school until the twins' teacher said the word "ask" so it sounded to the father like "ax". Can't have their precious boys raised by a teacher with an accent!. How could they spread their insane morals to the community if the kids wern't infecting the minds of the local schools with their virtues?

[@kevinh811]

This family reminds of someone I knew who kept telling his son he risked his entire future by skipping a class ONCE to go to a movie with friends. Six months later the dad was still going on about it. I wanted to say, “you’ve never had to deal with an actual real problem, have you?”

[@KalteSpatz]

Ugh my dad was like that. He was still going on about things I did in high school when I was 25. And he doesn't understand why I am no contact with him now...

[@user-wi9hv2pb2q]

I knew some kids their mother never let them have Lunch money or any other money to 'keep them off drugs.' I swear. Also, just buy your kids lunch at the start of the year.

[@keysersoze5032]

Ironically him criticizing him will end up doing more damage than skipping that class ever did

[@pdruiz2005]

No. With these annoying Christians real problems are completely ignored until they explode into something so big they can't be ignored anymore. To wit: @KalteSpatz who no longer contacts her dad anymore. That's a huge problem that is totally ignored by her dad, I bet.

[@TeamStudNation1280]

​@@KalteSpatzyou were in high school at 25?

[@spegynmerbles3993]

I grew up in a religious household and my sister always watched 7th Heaven. I will never forget the mom smokes weed episode, I laughed so hard

[@gojewla]

The “serious” marijuana episodes on those teenybopper goody-goody shows are so hilarious.

[@_adrian_sean]

The church world was SHOOK 😅 like they didn't live thru the 70s/80s

[@millennialodyssey5956]

​@@_adrian_seannot sure what you're talking about a ton of Christians would not watch this show. I am Christian and I heard people say when I was younger how this show is not Christian and I never watched it until I was way older just to see what it was about. Many "church" people are not even Christian themselves so much so that many of them thought this show was Christian in the first place.

[@FrenkTheJoy]

I think that's the single greatest moment from a very special episode of any show ever. The dad acting like the mom just admitted to killing a man and fucking the corpse when she admits to smoking weed once in college in the 70s.

[@EamonWill]

​@@millennialodyssey5956 What church did you grow up in?

[@riccardoleone4265]

it was very amusing how half of the children actors left the show more and less permanently and story just shrugs it off, replacing them with foster children and sons-in-law. Dude, your daughter has left your family so hard that she left your universe, you're not in the position to give family advices.

[@ShadowProject01]

😂

[@RobinFlysHigh]

I always found that incredibly accurate like, "Yup. They wanted to get away from this bs so they left."

[@andream9470]

Sounds like a pastor's family alright. Can't keep the ones born into it? Get the ones that can't leave.

[@alphabetsoup6681]

Didn’t Mary end up marrying someone the same age as her dad? #trauma

[@justintaylor3081]

I work at a school. A tween boy jokingly giving a middle finger would at BEST get a five second scolding from the principal.

[@rachelmcdonough1506]

Tbf my stepbrother got suspended once for flipping off the principal. That was the only time I’ve seen anyone get in serious trouble for that though.

[@RecMike]

Idk, man. Simon was flipping double birdies. That's gotta be at LEAST 10s with the principal.

[@Sweetkaos26]

@@rachelmcdonough1506yeah doing it a person especially to an administrator is very different just goofing off with other kids.

[@RoseyRosies]

That'll get you a "HEY!! 🫵😠"

[@NorthMountainFairy]

I love that the actress at the end has such a good sense of humor about it.

[@suzybearheart530]

When the mom bangs her chest at the white thugs and says “wanna piece of this?” That moment has lived rent free in my head ever since I saw it over 20 years ago 😅

[@kaydenevideo]

The fact that you got thee Beverly Mitchell is sending me. Could not be more iconic and hilarious

[@SirAgravaine]

ikr?!

[@clabrazil666]

That's the best part!!! 🤣

[@TeraGreene1]

😂😂❤❤❤

[@wonpilspiano]

I thought I was glitching cause I couldn’t believe my eyes lmao

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

I thought it was fake at first lol :D

[@arirenzi-surprenant6915]

This show is unhinged but I’m here for the train wreck.

[@Em-iy5vr]

Do you think the people who wrote it believed what they were writing or were they just taking the piss?!

[@ballyhigh11]

@@Em-iy5vr I think they just wanted the money and piss taking was an added bonus.

[@aliciabergman1252]

The alcoholic aunt definetly needs help but ...locking her up?! That's not legal! This family is like something out of a nightmare😅

[@randomgeekcrap]

They we're gonna send her to rehab anyway so what was the point of locking her up ?

[@re6bo]

Neither is kidnapping a bit so homeless child! These people were menaces. Smh

[@minuette1752]

It could be turned into a damn fine horror movie.

[@societycrumbles]

I also love how in those older family shows addiction was cured / solved in one ep. and never mentioned again.

[@Feverm00n]

It could also kill her. Alcohol withdrawal really can kill people.

[@haleyg9722]

“Rolling so hard on ginkgo biloba” really got me 😭

[@alexakearney]

So funny !!!

[@gnegna3856]

- Dad, can I wear baggy pants? - NO! - Dad, I found a homeless girl in the street. Can I keep IT as a pet? - Sure!

[@miss_conduct.]

I never thought "plain silken tofu" can be used to describe a family, but here it is.

[@Frosting1000]

Don’t insult tofu like that!

[@lastilnovista]

@@Frosting1000 for real! i remember when Tofu was considered an “exotic” “ethnic” food. this family are generic off-brand string cheese.

[@bwackbeedows3629]

@@lastilnovista Don't insult string cheese like that 🤣 I'd compare them to Kraft Singles, or some generic, off-brand American cheese.

[@KariIzumi1]

That’s an insult to tofu, tbh 😂

[@jmas43]

Unsalted saltines. They're definitely unsalted saltines.

[@Shelbytown123]

I grew up watching this show, and this brings back ALL the memories. The skit with Lucy at the end? DEAD.

[@TeraGreene1]

Right?! ❤❤💀 💨🥘

[@Quarktehduck]

For some reason the episode that is permanently stuck in my brain is the one where Simon takes a butter knife to school for his lunch and gets in trouble because it’s a “gateway knife” and that’s all I remember. 😂

[@AnnJo-gq8gu]

​@@Quarktehduck What the hell is a "getaway knife"?

[@Quarktehduck]

@@AnnJo-gq8gu *gateway knife, this show co-opted the anti-drug lingo to imply an “it starts with a butter knife but next thing you know it’s a machete!” argument.

[@AnnJo-gq8gu]

@@Quarktehduck 😯😁😂🤣🤣🤣🤣 ok thanks for answering me

[@jayvoorhies92]

the dad suddenly working at the police department 😂 those pastors got more jobs than Barbie!

[@gateauxq4604]

I can’t believe how many THE POORS episodes there were yet their ‘christian’ charity went as far as cleaning the dad’s apartment. Oh and all their moms are dead 😂

[@nerdymmermaid]

I love that the tag line is "You can relate", like who? Each episode is just a lifetime scary story for white suburban mom, with the script of a elementary school play.

[@user-kx1mb9qq4z]

Rich white suburban mom, get it right. The difference being the non rich white suburban mom, while not advertising it to her kids, isn't going to sound like she is telling her husband she's cheating on him when she tells him she used to smoke pot XD

[@RecMike]

​@@user-kx1mb9qq4z "I smoked pot, once! In college"😢 "JEZEBEL!! How could you?!"

[@betsyhendricks3078]

I could never understand how, on a preacher’s salary, they could buy all the Snapple they always had. Thanks, that was hilarious!

[@letitbeenow]

😂😂😂

[@msjannes75]

They got the house for free, it was part of the parish and came with the job so they had the extra income to buy the Snapple 😉

[@slowmotion187]

​@@msjannes75 ty someone that knows was up

[@jennifersmith3409]

The constant jabs at the dads real-life criminal record are so good. Then Simon says "Someone should check your hard drive" 🤣

[@Jenny-cd2so]

In response to “you better not be looking at my wife”, instead of saying he’s a doctor, you think the first line of defense would be “IM HER BROTHER”. LOL Oh man this show is too good.

[@kellharris2491]

Yeah it's like she is a possession.

[@esm82ify]

I think maybe he went with DOCTOR because BROTHER was already implied...but shit...who knows. We want to explain the reason he needed to look or touch his sister is in a professional capacity, not highlight the reason it's awkward

[@McP1mpin]

I think the idea was that he couldn't believe someone's brother would be looking at her gibletts.

[@sterlingross919]

Yassss forcing an alcoholic to go through withdrawal when non-medically assisted detox from alcohol is highly fatal!

[@lauracoutinho5478]

It depends how dependent you are. You have to be a hard core alkie for a long time for detox to be fatal. The sister was fine a couple years ago, so she wasn't so far gone she needed to be hospitalized. They mentioned that several times in the episode. At her stage of alcoholism, it would just be a very miserable weak or two.

[@babyfaceweeb8937]

Let's also ignore the kidnapping and false imprisonment.

[@sealteamsix1784]

reverend camden probably just assumed those seizures was the demon coming out.

[@plumdutchess]

The pastor dad just spying on all the teachable moments is hilariously creepy.

[@Roxase12]

The biggest lesson you never know they just might be poor

[@PurringDopamine]

My mom worshipped this show. This explains her being nosey and paranoid af 😂

[@anitacrumbly]

same I left at 17 and never looked back watching this video explains some of it. I watched as a kid but it seemed normal and that's the scary part.

[@42ayla]

My personal favourite was when they got a call from the doctor telling them their daughter was pregnant so they confronted her and she simply told them she couldn't be. Of course they didn't believe her. Turned out mom had gone for her physical with the same doctor around the same time and the office had mixed up the names. So much better.

[@KariIzumi1]

Oh God, I forgot that's how the Annie pregnancy was first written in! 🤦‍♀️👀 Pregnancy is a ridiculous thing for a teen to lie about since you can't hide it for that long (and you know ain't no abortions happening)

[@matthewm.986]

Actually, Eric and Annnie, the parents, did believe Mary when she told them she wasn't pregnant as she explained that she wasn't having sex.

[@akwood1873]

LOVE the subtle, under your breath, pedophile roasts of Stephen Collins!! 🤣🤣🤣 P.S. I had such a crush on Pastor Dad, growing up. 😳

[@carmengracepuentes7953]

I knooooow 😢😂

[@wesleyimschoot7597]

Subtle? LOL What was subtle about it? He just plain calls him out for it every chance he gets, and I'm living for it.

[@jackierenee1691]

I didn't, he always upset me. I always thought he was secretly making fun of everyone in his head because he smiled like my know it all older cousin lol. He didn't turn out as bad as Pastor dad though *shivers*. He's just an idiot.

[@OffTheWagons]

Apparently you were his type

[@RobinFlysHigh]

I don't think he's a pedo, just an exhibitionist. Still creepy af, but not as bad

[@queenzentertainmentinc.6338]

“Lucy’s playing checkers but Shelby’s definitely playing chess” 😂😂😂

[@EJourdanLewis]

Listen, I’m a Christian, and I still cackled all the way through this. I need more. The way I was hooked on this show as a kid is so embarrassing!

[@DajiaStar]

😂 same!

[@CartoonHero1986]

This show was seriously wild! My favorite is after the actor that played Matt was just so sick of the BS of the show he quit so they had some "bad boy" the family was trying to reform move in to replace him. His "bad boy" behaviour: he is comfortable with his own body and unashamed to show his chest and flirt with girls. I just remember the end of the first episode where they started to bring him in as a replacement for Matt as Matt was phased out of the story that Simon is walking around shirtless and the sisters shame him for it since the new guy only walks around shirtless now when he's going to take a shower. But the weird thing is that Simon only goes shirtless in the episode when he is at home with the family... who in the hell was he showing off for?

[@lstarsabb]

Actually Matt had health problems he was struggling with towards the end of the show that's why he wasn't on the show a lot. Mary left the show cause she hated playing the good girl and Robbie was her replacement because she did a sexy magazine cover so they cut her role because it went against "Their brand"

[@CartoonHero1986]

@@lstarsabb Oh yeah that's right the actor that played Matt had a run in with cancer or some other long/chronic illness. I totally forgot about that. Thanks for posting that correction that he was a replacement for Mary not Matt.

[@KariIzumi1]

And also, the way they flipped out over Mary having half a beer that one time......bruh 😭😂

[@CartoonHero1986]

@@KariIzumi1 lol that is reminding me of when Clueless had to do a anti-drug and reckless living PSA episode. Cher and Dee's childhood best friend comes to visit and has gone all goth, and become a pothead as a result of a neglectful father. She lights up a joint while they are out driving the other three refuse the joint but a cop tries to pull them over so they toss the joint and somehow the police officer picks it up even though they tossed it quite a ways back before pulling over and the police officer just walks over with the half a joint. Cut to Cher, Dee, and Amber in prison waiting for their parents to bail them out. LMAO

[@KariIzumi1]

@@CartoonHero1986 I remember that episode....I remember their goth friend but forgot about the cannabis lol It's just so unserious in IRL Beverly Hills kids can just score cocaine with Daddy's money and no one would give two shits about weed since they could all afford medical cannabis cards.

[@hermeticbear]

LMAO that last part. How did you find the actual actress to stage this? 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

[@gateauxq4604]

Waaait was that her?!????

[@societycrumbles]

@@gateauxq4604 Yeah, it was!

[@candicemaness]

I think it's awesome she did that!!

[@ontxtteredwxngs]

@@gateauxq4604Beverly Mitchell ❤ she was also in a saw movie which threw me for a loop

[@mahaM19911]

​​@@ontxtteredwxngshe fact the mom was in Childs Play 😅 it messes with my mind.

[@tifstar700]

Omg I’m literally dying! Did you seriously interview Beverly??? I cannot, that interview is the best thing I’ve ever seen on the internet.

[@bimgorling2036]

"Aren't you a predator?" Sent me!!! 🤣☠️

[@johanneshalberstadt3663]

OMFG, I watched this series back when it was on, and back then I actually never realized how weird and unhinged it was!!!😂😅. Like, seeing this now, I am almost pissing myself

[@napalm_lipbalm86]

Right 😅

[@MsFitz134]

My mom loved this show when I was a kid and now suddenly I understand her parenting 😂

[@TeraGreene1]

😂😂😂

[@crystallewis5902]

The thing that drove me the most crazy about this show is that the characters would never say goodbye before hanging up the phone. Well, that and Kevin's police partner who was the sole voice against the Iraq war, then all of a sudden a few episodes later she's super supportive of the war and the president.

[@queencleopatra007]

Lol most people in my family don't say goodbye when hanging up the phone either, but it still drives me insane

[@ontxtteredwxngs]

I bet it was bc of Natalie Maines’ views and the show runners not wanting to be cancelled like the Dixie chicks at that time.

[@McP1mpin]

It would be really weird if they were saying goodbye after hanging up the phone.

[@emily-crawford-soprano9181]

Lol that whole “everyone is good looking “ shit is stuff I heard a lot as a kid. There were only 4 of us but adults were constantly telling our mom about our looks like, as a collective.

[@gateauxq4604]

Sounds like they were shopping 🤢

[@gabrieladerre2862]

I can relate. Except for me, it was always people, mainly older women, walking and telling my mom, or more often, my grandma, that I was "too pretty to be a boy." Which didn't seem as weird until I grew up and thought about it. I do have really "soft," facial features and what not. Even as an adult. But damn! 😹😹😹

[@queencleopatra007]

​@@gateauxq4604pretty sure a lot of older family members say stuff like that as a way to build confidence, but don't realize how weird they sound. Of course, there are exceptions to the rule and kids should tell their parents if its making them uncomfortable.

[@Densetsu13]

I live for the guest appearance at the end! 😂

[@LiveAsDiva]

All the low blow jab at Stephen Collins all through the video sent me to jail... Hilarious, i am so immersed with your convoluted story telling and you just break the 4th wall with all the pedo jokes... I died

[@Tsukonin]

It's so bad it's comical. Love Beverley Mitchell's appearance as a guest at the end!

[@Anna81Louise]

There is an episode I remember where Simon is invited by a girl over to her house. The girl wants to have sex with Simon but he says no and they invite other friends around to hang out instead. But the pastor is suspicious and goes over to her house and spies through the window to make sure Simon wasn't having sex. The Pastor was always making it his mission to ensure that none of his kids had sex. Why is he always spying through windows and hiding, watching from behind things?

[@ImNotaRussianBot]

It's just foreshadowing.

[@RecMike]

He was actually trying to watch. He was hoping to eventually get to.

[@veroniquebronckaerts3533]

Thank you for this ! My husband and I watched the entire series together some years ago, basically reacting just like you... It was so funny. "Even the dog is a snitch!” is a great motto for this perfect US family. Still big fans of Jessica Biel, by the way. Too bad she was not available... Greetings from Europe!

[@emdeejay7432]

The worst part is, there are people who are actually like this and think we all need to be.

[@anitacrumbly]

seriously it's scary

[@ShadowProject01]

Pastor: You’re a bad dad Coach: Aren’t you a predator? Me:💀

[@lstarsabb]

My favorite " We have save Mary from herself" is when she is dating a man twice her age and everyone in the family tries to talk her out of that so much she leaves for good until she has a big secret that she married to a random guest star from like the first season and settles down for the rest of the show 😂

[@bigbearkat2010]

Personally I remember they had an intervention for her one time and Ruthie who was like 10 was basically telling her "nah I'm not wasting my energy on you anymore, you suck"

[@lstarsabb]

@@bigbearkat2010 she came back after like 2 months and went to school and was on the straight in narrow. This after she tried to be a firefighter and became a flight attendant. This one was the last intervention but they all did it one by one ending with Eric ambushing her in her car and they were fighting down the highway and Mary kicked him out of the car.

[@DudeHesRaggingonYourCord]

OMG!!!! All of your breakdowns are absolutely hilarious, even as kids, we knew this show was sooo lame….and the jabs at the p3do dad are the BEST

[@thewewguy8t88]

as a kid i was like yeah i am not watching this garbage lol.

[@sarahmiriam3950]

"you know where you're going if you keep wearing those pants?..... PRISON." TOOK ME TF OUT 😂 The way I just hollered in my office...

[@Em-iy5vr]

Of course the dad is randomly hanging around outside the school when they hug in the middle finger episode 😅😅 the bulimia one is probably the most bizarre, how did they even come up with that storyline 😂

[@jovianblue]

I'd like to think they were trying to vilify bulimic people but halfway through writing someone was like, "hey, that's not evil, it's actually just a medical condition" so they switched things up a bit.

[@jlee4039]

Whoa. Didn’t realize the actor playing the dad was a convicted child molester.😮😮😮

[@spikefivefivefive]

He looks like one.

[@randomgeekcrap]

He was method acting

[@A-t-r-u-s]

Yep, he loves the peaches & pancakes. 😵‍💫

[@cecenick123]

Yea and the worst part is he never served time

[@spikefivefivefive]

@@cecenick123 - I don't think any of the victims came forward.

[@Ambient_Jazz2212]

Omg the drunk aunt getting the makeover only to end up serving Sarah: Plain & Tall

[@jennifertaylor2593]

“This family is so lame… even the dog’s a snitch” 😂😂

[@carriehooper32]

I'm a pastor's kid and I remember watching this show all the time growing up in the 90s, with my mom and sister. My mom was constantly annoyed at the fancy house they lived in that a real pastor's salary could never afford XD. She also loved analyzing all the tings that would never happen in a real church office.

[@bigbearkat2010]

I thought it was explained in universe that the house belonged to the church so it came free with the job

[@gretaweiss6802]

Rob, this is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while. 😂😂7th Heaven is so nuts! Thank you!! You’re the best 🩵🩵 Edit: omg the therapy session at the very end!

[@RITardNation]

“Why are these adults ALWAYS in the kids business?“ I was legit thinking the same thing, and constantly blowing things out of proportion lol

[@ange4048]

Omg I have been doing a rewatch from the beginning as well and I have been HORRIFIED by how problematic this show was. It turned into a hate watch. Those kids had so many ‘talks’ with their parents it was ridiculous. And for a Christian family that is supposed to have responsible rules around dating and sex it sure was a constant topic as well as the parents constantly being inappropriate and weird… if people really did grow up in these types of households they would have so many hang ups. Also the oldest brother is borderline stalker and gaslighting in his relationships

[@Sweetkaos26]

The family was actually Protestant not Christian

[@queencleopatra007]

​@Sweetkaos26 Protestants ARE Christians. They believe in the teachings of and worship Jesus Christ, that's the basic definition of a Christian.

[@jenniferferguson1517]

@@Sweetkaos26Protestant are Christian

[@bigbearkat2010]

So basically Full House with a Degrassi edge

[@BoxOfShockolates]

“We know why you’re there….” & “shouldn’t you be in the back of one of these” 💀💀💀 dying

[@caitlinbelforti870]

I wonder why I was so obsessed with this show when I was 12 and then I realize it's because Barry Watson was very pleasant to look at.

[@napalm_lipbalm86]

Same honestly 🤣

[@dammitamber]

So I grew up in a military family and my dad worked in a church my whole life and I’m telling you, these families exist - they truly do, and they’re exactly this way, and I’m grateful for having known them.

[@anitacrumbly]

This is not a healthy family dynamic at all. Kindness is wonderful but the lack of privacy, all the snooping/ paranoia and all the judgement slinging and weirdness around dating and sex would lead to anxious children who feel shame about themselves then pushing that on everyone they meet even more unhealthy things to portray for your kids. Having grown up in a family with these same values/rules it was the worst and I got out at 17 and never looked back, a lot of people share in my experience.

[@lazaruscain3424]

Therapist: I am going to make so. Much. MONEY.

[@ticketyboo2456]

I like how they call glue-sniffing "huffing". It almost sounds wholesome 😂

[@TheSkankxrhapsody]

“You’re not a bad person, you’re just poor” 😂

[@laureneras9523]

I forgot about the autistic kid they kept hidden...because ableism!!! This show was WILD!!!

[@jamesskinner4752]

This show is an absolute riot and should be watched entirely for historical purposes.

[@ZuperZocker]

Was not expecting the end

[@Feare909]

Everytime the dad is referred to as a pedophile, you add 5 minutes to my lifespan 🤣☺️

[@existereOracle]

"ive smoked pot" line of all time...

[@Jah_LEASE_yah]

The "Aunt Julie is an alcoholic" episode is wild! I only now as an adult realize how absurdly irresponsible it was for Eric and Annie to try and detox her at home with five children in the house. What were they thinking! They should have put her in rehab immediately and let medical professionals help her detox.

[@justjessy0115]

Omg i CAN NOT with this guy. I freakin love listening to him narrate ANYTHING. You gave me the laughs i didn't know i needed today

[@WildKat25]

My family watched a bunch of 7th heaven and honestly that shit was hilarious. Especially when a majority of the kids were adults/late teens. The early stuff when they are kids is just silly.

[@tinaskwierczynski8599]

I lost it at "theyre on that good shit, theyre on that Benjamin Moore "

[@alexakearney]

LOL!!!!

[@dustin628]

Omg i SCREAM LAUGHED at this!! Your commentary is so hilarious! I totally remember watching this as a kid on WB every week but really dont remember it being this ridiculous lol

[@thatonemom2016]

This 18 minutes of my life spent watching this collection of shorts was so therapeutic. You are a godsend for healing years of trauma I had as a little kid watching this horrible show. 😢

[@bryanaperry8760]

When you showed Rod the Rastafarian, a sound emerged from me that ive never made before... My sleeping partner super appreciated it... lol

[@thepalaceworm]

THANK YOU! I was waiting, for decades now, to meet someone who hated to love this show as much as I do!

[@RobinFlysHigh]

Haha yus

[@heartquaked]

I watched this show RELIGIOUSLY when it aired (no pun intended) - I can’t believe I didn’t realize how insane it was then 🤣🤣

[@ganapatikamesh]

LOL. You didn’t even mention the episode where the math teacher keeps stealing Lucy’s lunch that Lucy accidentally leaves in the classroom everyday and comes home hungry. When she tells her mom about it, the mom isn’t even upset, just goes to find out why and the teacher says she’s using the theft of her lunch in hopes that child hunger might help Lucy understand the geometry problem. I mostly remember it because most of my teachers at the small rural school I went to were devout Christians and for several days after that episode aired they all had some variation of a rant on how horrible the teacher and the parents were for doing that to a kid. Love the cameo at the end! I haven’t watched that show in years and really only used to watch reruns of it during the summer when my friends were away at campe or our camping with family or off at family reunions. I mostly thought it was a weird show (especially when I was told it wasn’t a comedy by a classmate) and never really understood why it was popular. Especially since so many very devoutly religious people I knew seemed to constantly rant about the show’s episodes. Like I rarely ever heard anyone talk about it as if they watched it because they liked it. It honestly seemed like people were either watching it to mock it or watching it to criticize it. But I definitely remember it, so it has that going for it! Great video!

[@Madame-la-Lune]

Oh man, I occasionally watched this drivel when it aired back in the day and it is so much worse than I remember. How did this go on for 11 seasons? That's nuts. Anyway, these recaps were AMAZING! I'm in stitches over here!

[@bigbearkat2010]

WB/CW has a habit of keeping shows going for way too long if there's a consistent audience for it

[@mandymckk]

I unironically watched this as a kid and I never realized how absolutely ridiculous it is

[@cosmobella20]

Every time he inserted the pastor dad roast in there I literally lost it lmfaooooooo

[@itsblosseybitch6062]

The episode when Wilson catches Mary cheating on him with Ben is one of the most unintentionally funny moments. Wilson looks sad and said how he wanted to surprise her with pizza because he got home from work early. And Ben just says “we already ate.” 😂

[@laurendukes3099]

Don't know how I'm JUST now seeing this 😂😂😂😂 every time you added how the pastor/dad should be in jail, an angel got its wings

[@MadameTamma]

I remember this show airing all the time on ABC family as a kid but I only ever saw maybe 2 or 3 episodes. I was always so confused as to who this show was for. It was such a clean cut family show like Full house but it was entirely joyless. It was filmed and acted as though it was a serious drama. Even as someone who grew up in a catholic house hold I didn't get it. The only people I can imagine really liking it unironically are strict, christian parents who gave their kids an extremely limited list of media they were allowed to watch.

[@lauracoutinho5478]

my sister loved the show when I was growing up. She was the goody two shoes catholic girl of the family. Me, I watched it because it was fun to imagine a universe where a kid's biggest problem is giving the middle finger in sight of his mom and where every useless drunk gets rescued by the community. I laugh and also want to scream at the episode where Mary is sent away because she failed to keep up with her bills so clearly at age 18 isn't as mature as she should be. This show was made and aired right before the massive crash of millennials being so screwed over by society that even now, most of us can't pay our bills. Oh Mary, to be in your shoes! I'd give anything to be in your world that could be solved with heart to heart talks and minimal effort!

[@nealwhaley63]

As the series went on, the writers laughed more at the family. Not with them, at them.

[@rustygribbler1380]

Flipping the bird a crime against humanity 😂😂😂 Anything but the bird its horrifying

[@KelseyODonnell17]

11:59 Don't mess with mom, she fought Chucky

[@mykeljmoney]

This is fantastic, thanks for the laughs! I just started rewatching Touched By An Angel and it’s also an amazing artifact of inspirational Christian programming. I’d love your take on it as well!

[@jasonbarney4278]

“This is Tori Amos going thrifting”. I’m DEad! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@jellogirl2010]

The gang episode scared me SO bad when I watched it for the first time. My heart stopped when they found the stuff in her brother's room and I could barely keep it together. I was really young so don't judge too hard.

[@letitbeenow]

😂😂

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

Seeing it now you can tell it was all staged lol XD

[@jellogirl2010]

@@RedRoseSeptember22 Oh for sure! Like a lot of the stuff I watch you can tell is a show but this especially takes the cake.

[@mysteriiis]

I guarantee that gang episode was originally a Satanic Panic story. The 'gang paraphernalia' scene is straight out of a 'ebils of the Devil' propaganda video. And the belt buckle makes way more sense if it's a pentacle. 'It's just a star.'

[@CC3193]

I noticed in the shot of the gang stash they find, it’s all laid out new and very neatly like a catalogue! Very unrealistic

[@Wickedgarden375]

I SNORTED at “Can I give you a makeover?” With the Bloomingdale’s bag🤣🤣

[@letitbeenow]

And the makeover is making her look like a fundamentalist sister-wife 😭

[@FurrySupportMain]

I’m dying from the nunchucks scene everytime 😂

[@AstroMoonGoddess]

“fruitopia” the most 90’s drink ever 😂

[@greendayfecer]

Let me tell you, I watched 7th heaven in middle school. That show was my jam and half the time it made zero sense. This show was freaking wild.

[@workedfriday]

"she might just be poor" is the follow up for every argument.

[@rqdh22501]

Rolling hard on ginkgo biloba 😂😂😂 Oh my goodness Fruitopia forgot all about that