The Narcissist Test: 9 Signs You Are Dealing with A Narcissist

Unlock Endless Learning, so You Can Continuously Grow and Strengthen Your Relationships. Join Our Lifetime Membership & Save $1000 For a Limited Time!
bit.ly/lifetime-sale-youtube
Heal Your Attachment Style & Dramatically Improve Your Relationships: Unlock Your FREE All-Access Pass to PDS Courses Today!
university.personaldevelopmen...
Overcome and Heal Narcissistic Abuse by Learning the Hidden Signs and Symptoms with: Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse
university.personaldevelopmen...
In this video, Thais Gibson shares 9 signs that you may be dealing with a narcissist, including love bombing, fantasy bonds, gaslighting and more. Learn to identify the hidden behaviors and warning signs of a narcissist as Thais offers up some transformative advice and guidance. For more information check out the relevant course above on how to learn techniques that will help you heal and overcome narcissistic abuse.
---
00:00:00 - Intro
00:01:03 - Overwhelmed By Narcissism
00:01:31 - Love-Bombing
00:02:33 - Fantasy Bond
00:04:04 - Grandiosity
00:05:20 - Needing To Have The Upper Hand
00:05:56 - Manipulation
00:08:34 - Controlling Behavior
00:10:24 - Struggle To Admit Fault
00:11:16 - Gaslighting
00:11:27 - Struggle To Apologize
00:11:31 - 7-Day Free Trial: Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse Course
00:14:17 - Lifetime Promo
00:14:48 - Summary
00:15:04 - Conclusion
---
Discover What Your Attachment Style is and How It Could Be Holding Your Relationships Back … Take Quiz Here 👉bit.ly/attachment-quiz-youtube
Follow Us for Daily Relationship Insights and Breakthroughs on Our Social Channels!
Instagram - / thepersonaldevelopment...
Facebook - / thepersonaldevelopment...
TikTok - / thaisgibson
LinkedIn - / thepersonaldevelopment...
Podcast - pod.link/1478580185
---
Subscribe to Our KZbin Channel for Your Daily Dose of Personal Growth and Relationship Transformations!
www.youtube.com/@ThePersonalD...
Hey there! I'm Thais Gibson, and this is the channel where I teach you how to transform your life.
I created the Personal Development School, an online learning platform that gives users the ability to create true and long-lasting change in their lives through personal development courses that are designed to give you a breakthrough in every area of your life, with a 99.7% satisfaction rate.
Our KZbin videos give you a glimpse into this in-depth course content. Much of what you'll learn here is based on your attachment style and how that affects the relationships you have with your family, friendships, and of course, your romantic relationships.
So what are you waiting for? This could be the start of your personal development journey. Subscribe to our channel and start watching!
#PersonalDevelopmentSchool #ThaisGibson #PDS #AttachmentStyles #NarcissistTest #NPD #NarcissismCourse #LoveBombing #FantasyBond #Gaslighting

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Are there any other signs you would add or have experienced? Please comment below:

[@cornwallismorgan874]

I would add that there is no ability to introspect and connect behaviors to consequences. They have zero understanding of cause and effect or how their actions affect the world around them.

[@cloudslady3400]

1- can’t get intimate..even though they love bomb..which will confuse the hell out of you..they don’t mind telling you they love you each minute for any and everything but can’t open an honest discussion and refuse vulnerability 2- have an empty look in their eyes 3- don’t listen at all to anything you want to say they just reply so they can talk 4- get a sense of joy out of your suffering 5- they feel offended if they saw someone else being cared for/ the attention on someone else

[@fuzzy76]

@@cornwallismorgan874 If that was true, they would not be good manipulators.

[@cornwallismorgan874]

@@fuzzy76 Two things can be true at once. They are good manipulators, but they don't understand why, after manipulating people and losing all their support systems, why they have no support systems.

[@deniz7172]

This helped me tremendously. My ex-partner was big on number 5. But I also always felt a bit at unease about his eyes when we could try to resolve conflict. Also 3... and 4 at times.... yikes@@cloudslady3400

[@Brandon-yr3nj]

my favorite test is “if you found out that they secretly hate you, it would not really surprise you”. but a general feeling of helplessness/like nothing works is a good sign something is wrong.

[@dibsidubsi1378]

A video on covert narcissists and their attachment style would be highly appreciated.

[@cornwallismorgan874]

This is where being a DA actually really comes in handy, because I don't bond easily. Narcissists hate me and I'm not sad about it.

[@0Demiyah0]

I also purposefully date slow and observational. I don't have intimacy with people until months into the connection. I don't adopt this style of dating because I am avoidant, I do it as a filtering and vetting strategy to separate the chaff from the wheat. The guys who have high narcissistic traits hate it. They start to try to implement power dynamics very soon, they try to manipulate you to relinquish boundaries, they weaponize their vulnerabilities to guilttrip, and they complain and tell you how you should be when they feel they are not ahead or pedestalized, then they devalue you when you reject them. I just ended a two week connection with a self-admitted AP who had all of these behaviors. The way he reacted to letting him down showed his true colors.

[@SmartestDumbGuy]

The crazy thing about DA and narcacism is that it's hard to tell them apart. Some even think they are the same.

[@5gx673]

Really appreciate your compassion and kindness in approaching this topic

[@5gx673]

Whoops that was meant to be a comment not a reply, sorry

[@fede6369]

@@phoenix99005I don know what kind of DA you know, but they are really far from that.

[@anothercat9600]

A lot are victim narcissists, so they don't appear grandiose, except they are, and will aggressively put their own feelings of misery in the spotlight, and no one else's feelings really seem to matter. They often get misdiagnosed as bpd, or cptsd, or bipolar, but that is not what they have. Ppl with those diagnoses have empathy. Victim narcissists don't.

[@eokhonko]

We have a few of those in PDS members group, constantly posting about their misery and how bad their relationship is with someone, yet, not walking away or doing anything about it really. I think a lot of people in PDS don’t Spot victim or vulnerable NPD folks easily because I see members keep enabling such behaviour

[@lifecoachingtoronto]

Using The 6 Human Needs, it sounds like narcissists value the need of significance WAY more than the need for love & connection because they believe being significant (special, needed, wanted) will get other people to admire & supposedly (love) them

[@eokhonko]

Funny how I thought the same when I saw a post in a members group from a lady who flat out admitted she had significance wound. And then went on to post about her relationship where she tried to force/manipulate her poor BF into rejecting polyamorous relationships and adopting monogamy because of her 😂😂😂 And nobody called her out on her manipulative behaviour and the fact that she appears to have a narcissistic injury. And that’s a member’s group where people are supposed to be savvy about narcissistic abuse and deep into self development

[@cornwallismorgan874]

@@eokhonko Even if they're savvy on narcissism, it's taboo to hold women accountable for their actions in many developed countries, especially the US where female narcissistic traits are rampant. Even if they connected the dots, it wouldn't surprise me if they opted to stay silent because the group would've dog-piled them.

[@eokhonko]

@@cornwallismorgan874 you are obviously not a member 😏 that’s not the reason, more like when women like these keep posting and keep complaining about their relationships for years on end without actually any visible healing process, the de facto group behaviour is to continue to enable such victimhood and victim based supply seeking behaviour because tough love is frowned upon in the group. Has nothing to do with what you said. And I would check your attitude to women overall. You won’t grow if you villainize women as a group. That’s the 1st thing our ego does, looks for external reasons instead of looking introspectively inside

[@cornwallismorgan874]

@@eokhonko It has everything to do with what I said, and can play out the way you described as well. I'm not criticizing women; I'm criticizing the culture surrounding us. Yes, I too am a woman and I recognize how damaging it is to treat us like we can do no wrong. And side note, taking petty pot shots at my perceived lack of status, which stems from a preoccupation with status, is a narcissistic trait. So instead of dismissing what I said and using my relative growth to distract from your own, you should focus on yourself and start introspecting to the extent that will allow you to truly understand what I'm talking about.

[@eokhonko]

@@cornwallismorgan874 sorry dear, you are not making any sense to me and your last statement sounds like a word salad. You mixed up everything. 1) The difference btw our views is clear, you think women are not held accountable because they are treated somehow differently as a group. My view is about specific culture in therapeutic communities like PDS where it’s frowned upon to not be “supportive”, ie express directly that topic posters abuse support system to receive supply. These are two different view points. And one has nothing to do with the other. 2) You have also called me a narcissist for simply stating that you are most likely not part of the PDS member group, otherwise you would know about “support culture” I am talking about. And did not attribute that to some kind of special treatment of an entire gender group, which I don’t think it’s true, but rather a story you are telling yourself for a reason? So how is that related to me pointing out to your status? Sorry, you lost me there 😂 And how did u manage to turn my words into your status thing? Logic is literally not even there. 3) You want me to do introspection so that I get your point deeper? Heh? I either introspect to see my point? And why I have it? But how can I introspect to see YOUR point? this just doesn’t make sense to me. Your entire statement above doesn’t make much sense to me really and reminds me one of the traits of NPD - the salad, a common feature. I will stop this discussion here because it doesn’t make sense to me. And because you are seeing stuff that is not there and because you are name calling and diagnosing me with a serious disorder without any grounds whatsoever. I am going to block you just for safety and peace of mind. No offence.

[@roshalllambert]

The point about viewing relationships in terms of power struggle and wanting to control things was bang on!! Also I always appreciate the fact that Thais always speaks about Narcs compassionately!

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Thanks San :)

[@NalaMahal]

It’s so crazy how all narcissists use the same playbook! I dated two and both of them painted a picture of taking me on trips overseas - I’m sure I have more stamps in my passport - and make me fall for them. They also both painted a picture of being the hero and desired by other women. It was crazy. I’m glad it was just dating and I wasn’t emotionally invested. Edit: I definitely felt overwhelmed by both. And at least with one of them, I always got the sense that he was making himself sound more than what he was.

[@StMoi-yl8il]

A great video! I did webinar course on narcissism a couple of months back, and I enjoyed it very much. I found a lot of answers, and important questions that really helped me clarify some things with myself. That is something I hope everyone struggling with this topic remembers, you must do this for yourself. I wholeheartedly recommend the course, and PDS in general!

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Thank you for saying that! ❤

[@5gx673]

Really appreciate your compassion and kindness in approaching this topic. Thanks

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

You're welcome :)

[@0Demiyah0]

I think I just swerved an aggressive AP that I cannot diagnose but showed narcissistic traits. I sniffed it out pretty fast, and he showed his true colors when I said "no" and reinforced a boundary. He insulted me and was very manipulative and self-victimizing on the way out. Then he blocked me - good - I love it when the trash takes itself out.

[@LeeChrissy]

Dodged a bullet there. ❤

[@emilyduchess]

#5 made everything click for me. thank you for this!

[@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool]

Glad that helped :)

[@TamagoEgg]

Narcissist is aware of what they are doing instead of acting out of fear. They do not have the self-awareness/reflection instead trying all kind of alternatives if one method doesnt work.

[@HH-pj5bl]

Omg this video is just in time, Thais can you do a breakdown of the Jonah hill and his ex Sarah Brady saga, it's seems there maybe be narc tendencies. It will be interesting how you break it down🤔. Thank you and love you❤

[@mosabmahmod4794]

Please Thais, I have a question: as a dismissive avoidant, how to be sure of my feeling of being manipulated?. I am asking that because when DA become aware of his behavior he gets confused, and maybe go to other direction and to make the relationship works every red flag becomes his own responsibility. What's the difference? How DA can have confidence in his own feelings and not just ignore the need for ending the relationship in the name of healing?

[@deniz7172]

I've also been very confused about this. I'm relatively secure but with triggered DA at times. I was starting to feel controlled, like my personal expression and/or autonomy was starting to be threatened. Or would be in the future. I expressed clearly how I felt and needs, but also applied some pretty text book DA reasoning over time.. Dramatic climax where he eventually super de-activated. Later I got help to see my own de-activation. Leaving me super confused if my de-activaition triggered some more intense anxiousness or if it was narcissistic traits..

[@kcinc9574]

I’m assuming that dismissive avoidant types are the least likely attachment types to be abused by a narcissist, and believe this topic may allow dismissive, avoidant types to continue to point the finger at others, and not understand how their actions may be the root cause of behavior, the view as narcissistic. My suggestion might be to keep non-deep dive discussions to attachment styles, because bringing in Narcissis opens up a whole can of curiosity that this single podcast could not hope to address in an hour or less. Thank you and love everything else I’ve seen here from you keep up the good work!

[@eokhonko]

In view of this, in the membership PDS group I have already spotted a few people who most likely have NPD or are on cluster B spectrum and keep posting on the group compulsively under the guise of “self-awareness “, but then do absolutely 0 to work on their wounding and self correcting their behaviour. I wish at least in the members group there was a lot more moderation in terms of what and who can post.

[@konvict451]

I couldnt tell if she was talking about a Dismissive Avoidant or a Narcissist.

[@lisalee6501]

I’m seeing someone now who want to spend almost every day with me and he has me on a pedestal. He text every morning and night that i’m perfect and too pretty for him. Not a narc but he’s AP i think and are doing the same love bombing and now i want to flee and feel trapped. Do people who love bomb without having a personality disorder love bomb as a manipulation or don’t they realize it?

[@lisalee6501]

Yes, i have been extremely infatuated myself it was like being on drugs, that’s how i know you don’t have to be a narc to love bomb because i’ve been there. But i remember even in that state i didn’t call to see them every day or going too fast, i was afraid to scare them off. This guy dosn’t seem to mind when he calls literally right after seeing me to ask when he can see me again and he also says he’s planning to buy me a trip to another country. I’m just starting to feel anxious and like i can’t breathe but i appreciate you saying it may all be innocent infatuation

[@lisalee6501]

Thanks, i’ll try communicate that to see. I’m already friendzoning him which i often do if i want someone in my life but not as a boyfriend, but it wouldn’t hurt trying before giving up :)

[@brianhill6842]

We need to be careful labeling people narcissists just trying to get to know someone. If someone takes an interest in your interests, does not make Someone a narc.

[@LeeChrissy]

I was just discussing this. I think a lot of people have narcissistic traits but aren't straight narcissists. I think the difference between getting to know someone and a narc coming in hot is that they want to move VERY fast. Says I love you, move in right away, meet family within the first couple of weeks, not following through on what they sold you at the beginning.

[@brianhill6842]

@@LeeChrissy I agree. I said what I said because too many times lately the person who is doing the hurting will try to make you feel terrible for just doing things for them because you wanted them to know you appreciated them.

[@LeeChrissy]

@@brianhill6842 I hate to say it, but there are so many unhealed people out there and they don't know how to date, so I can understand your confusion. I'm one of them. I'm a FA and if I swear my mind is programmed now to only be attracted to men who lean more avoidant now. I have a full time career where I work 7 days a week, 2 kids and an awesome social circle. My time is so limited that someone who leans anxious wouldn't work for me. That person can be super sweet and do all the right things, it just doesn't work for my lifestyle to see anyone more than a few hours a week. Remember though, someone thinking that you're too much is just their story they tell themselves. It doesn't make it accurate. If multiple people say it then that's probably something to look into, but if it's just a one off then I'm sure it's fine. I know a guy who tried dating a few of my friends. He was "too much" for all of them. But now he found someone who he's been with for a few years now. They seem very happy. To me he seems AP so I'm wondering if she's secure or maybe leans more anxious which would likely make them perfect partners? Anyways, I'm taking Thais's courses to fix my mess. I know my way of thinking hasn't been the healthiest either and my dating history is 👎.