The One Percent | American Voter

[@Gangstabob716]

"Sir we haven't given you the script yet"

[@KittyUZutty]

BEST COMMENT

[@dbteepo86]

And yet they went with the first take anyways 🤣

[@TheKreativity]

"We're unsure of whether we still intend to, actually"

[@ajayghale9215]

"what script? i thought you were interviewing me"

[@TheKreativity]

@@ajayghale9215 there's always a place for the good ol' "what are you talking about?" as well

[@22OS89]

Love how he didn't even know who the Democratic nominee was

[@peterg76yt]

He sort of does though.

[@Lewa500]

This is from 2016

[@Unstable316]

​​@@Lewa500Yet the description says he's giving his thoughts about the 2024 elections

[@KasumiRINA]

@@Unstable316 Even if accidentally, it just adds a layer to joke.

[@cooperm4185]

I think this is a reupload

[@Swedishmafia101MemeCorporation]

What an upstanding citizen. Let's make him pay even less taxes.

[@renenowicki]

Agreed. Sweet, sweet tax cuts. It will trickle down and enrich us all.

[@NJ-wb1cz]

​@seven4489 I found my Rich Person by going up to Him clutching my dusty hat and saying, "Please Master, may I have some work?" That was decades ago and I'm still working His fields while He is ten times richer today. This is what true fulfillment is, knowing your lowly miserable life was used for something good in this world

[@JeffryBozes]

He won't care tbh lol the numbers in his bank account are just tools to control the pleebs.

[@adrianthoroughgood1191]

How about going back to the traditional policies that made the American economy great in the past: 90% top income tax rate.

[@uninspiredname4445]

"Taxes? I hardly know her!"

[@AnexistentialdogontheInternet]

As a golfer the shitty swing really just put the Cherry on top for me

[@davidparker9676]

You are part of the 1% if you golf. Shame on you and your offspring with their golf privilege!

[@usernametaken017]

Crazy how confortable people got to the point where you can say you're a golfer and nobody acts like it's a problem. Dusgusting

[@scotttatertot69]

Lmao I love this golf slander.

[@scotttatertot69]

Lmao I love this golf slander.

[@RubenContreras-s1c]

Lmao I love this golf slander

[@MissFazzington]

Why are they making real news all of a sudden

[@dengueberries]

always did

[@Sonilotos]

True that​@@dengueberries

[@venum17]

Because the current world is beyond satire

[@deryck-kr2tl]

lmao

[@Sonilotos]

@@venum17 the Onion has always been truthful in how it parodied real life events of its time. This is nothing new.

[@SclountDraxxer]

This really pissed me off. Excellent job, Onion!

[@OLG.R]

Cry :)

[@Larry_Bird1]

@OLG.R Woah, woah, woah. I didn’t know we had such an alpha among us. Not caring about others opinions? Gee wiz, this guy sure is tough. I’m sure everybody likes him.

[@budgetarms]

@@Larry_Bird1 I know, Larry

[@marclrx2495]

I love that the onion's youtube channel is making a comeback

[@Psyclonus7]

Yeah! It's great!

[@mehboobkm3728]

Apparently, they found out that they could monetize the channel. Remember there were no ads before this! but we are not complaining!

[@exitmatrix91]

Me too

[@NotUselessProductions]

Same

[@marclrx2495]

@@mehboobkm3728 that's all thanks to global tetrahedron. All hail global tetrahedron!

[@Blukat2-pb8lx]

0:15 Nice way to reinforce his disconnectedness

[@hobbyl0s]

This video is from 2016

[@NoName-ik2du]

@@hobbyl0s I noticed that, too, even though the upload date is today. Where has it been hiding all these years?

[@bettafish541]

​@@NoName-ik2duit's either a forgotten video or that's an intentional joke

[@LoveLearnShareGrow]

Might be a re-upload.

[@xxTheOOBxx]

@@bettafish541 It was uploaded on the onions webpage years and years ago. Still relevant today.

[@andybell-lazyrivr]

The Onion's dropping some real truth bombs lately!

[@zivzulander]

These days we have to go to fake outlets for real truth 😑😁

[@ArcYT]

don't say that word, you can't say tr*th on KZbin anymore

[@MC-wh3xm]

Oh did they make a video on Zuckerberg donating 500M to dems and censoring people on their behalf?

[@markstevenson6635]

This appears to be OLD since it's Trump vs Clinton

[@gaelleinjeyan]

​@@markstevenson6635 this was made 9 hours ago so ig it was just a joke?

[@pplesandoranges]

"Excellent! Give my regards to the actor." "We didn't hire an actor, director."

"He just came to our scene, and paid us to film the video, then he left"

[@krishcshah]

Where was the satire?

[@Sonilotos]

What do you mean? The Onion is and always has been the #1 reliable news source.

[@BarDog57]

Trump vs. Clinton

[@zen7ry]

it's post-satire satire.

[@phlogistonstudio8261]

@@krishcshah they’ve gone past satire and irony, straight into sardonic. The stoic journals of the Onions, “great shallot phase” will be forthcoming.

[@icecreamdf5259]

I guess the satire is that real billionaire assholes generally pretend that they care about these things. This guy is just unrealistically honest.

[@crazycatlady183]

What's crazy is how close to the truth this character is and I've met very wealthy people like him.😮

[@jamielondon6436]

Direct. Honest. Truthful. What more can you expect.

[@tguerraew]

He has my vote. As worthless as it is

[@SiiriCressey]

Yep. This is indeed the kind of thing I'd expect from such a person when they are being honest.

[@avelynn5976]

I'd vote for him 🙏

[@Timorio]

Spot on. How was your day.

[@pumacaine]

humor

[@trevoreyre2775]

The most honest American citizen. He should run for president.

[@gus473]

Why take a demotion...? ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[@jasonbartlett6795]

Write him on your ballot. 😂 just kidding

[@aerobiesizer3968]

He's already running.

[@ggcatbelladogantics2959]

Isn’t a guy just like him already running for President?

[@Dr.KarlowTheOctoling]

@@ggcatbelladogantics2959Theres 2 like him running, just showering it with their worldviews.

[@alexschannelorsomething6673]

" Dont make me laugh. America is a business. Not a country. "

[@ironhell813]

Unfortunately it is. And a pretty dishonest one at that.

[@kalamari3288]

If America is a business, it's a pretty inefficient one. Needs some downsizing and massive layoffs.

[@robezy0]

There's only one business disguising as a country and that is Singapore Inc.

[@ProjectEkerTest33]

@@kalamari3288 How do you downsize a country? Should they kick out the more useless states?

[@kalamari3288]

@@ProjectEkerTest33 I want you to look up the definition of downsizing, because I don’t think it means what you think it means.

[@lexus8018]

The fact he's talking about 2016 is icing on the cake

[@PathanShortVideos]

Nothing says FREE SPEECH as much as paying people 1 million dollars to say what you want them to say.

[@Defektyd]

As long as it isn't one million and one dollars, it's free.

[@PathanShortVideos]

​@@Defektyd Elon musk give 1 million to every voters who vote to Trump 😅

[@Admiral-General_Aladeen]

The funny part is that reciving the money from an illegal lottery is illegal too meaning all the winners might be screwed

[@Xeem_Pad]

I mean... Yes, that's free speech. Corrupt, but free nonetheless. Just like praying Hitler is free speech, even though it's ducked up

[@Watykaniak]

Trump2024!

[@fubarbaz]

It's way worse than this: he should be saying he doesn't care who wins because he picked BOTH candidates. 'Go ahead and vote for one of the candidates I chose for you, see what happens.'

[@Mr.H333]

Uniparty

[@ArcLite-s1m]

Underrated

[@intellectually_lazy]

don't blame me, i voted for kodos

[@kennethfisher7013]

Boss Tweed quote.

[@leonardpearlman4017]

I imagine if you support both or ALL candidates generously, whatever happens you HAVE "already won" and will probably profit handsomely whatever happens!

[@tony_antony_lemony]

What about Trump's promise to the Amish? The permanent power outage will affect him, won't it?

[@abarette_]

nah, he'll be wealthy regardless

[@bettafish541]

why would he care, he has houses all over the world and all his factories are spread across eastern asia

[@MC-wh3xm]

@@bettafish541 Like Obama's mansions all over the world? Oh wait how did he make his money again?

[@repnir7428]

You think those policies would apply to him? Even if they do it's not like he'd face consequence from violating them so it doesn't even really matter.

[@-caesarian-6078]

His mansion and trading floor have independent power generators, the boom in connections and customers he will attract with his electric lighting will more than pay for the generators, and for the recurring fines for using electricity ;)

[@akeleven]

I will pay money to have this shown on TV commercial

[@jasonheath4266]

As the lowliest of the 99%, I endorse this message.

[@geizigeratze]

Bro 50% of the people together only own 16% of the total US wealth. 80% less than a third. Everyone is broke except a few. It's the medieval times all over again

[@sup8429]

but the government can do and has actually done a lot for the lowests of the 99%. sure it may not be enough but it's not something that won't affect you.

[@icemanvamp7433]

The only real news outlet left

[@knight-mares]

The Onion got kinda lame, they’re just covering real news stories now.

[@GyprockGypsy]

They've been doing it by accident for almost 20 years now. My favorite is still "Seething white hot ball of hate for President!"

[@TheJadedJames]

The Onion has been reporting facts since the “White Hot Sphere/Horrible Lurking Fog” story after the 2012 election

[@alexcardosa8079]

That is the real scary part, they don't have to do much more than tell the real news.

[@neelubird]

THANK YOU! More honest than any other party political broadcast

[@ronture8279]

The sheer unexpected vulgarity really surprised me. Awesome work as usual, The Onion.

[@Jotari]

You sound like a bot.

[@HeviltheDevil]

Rich people are pretty casually profane.

[@ronture8279]

@@Jotari No; I'm a real human. I have a website, too.

[@Tr4ns1st0r]

@@ronture8279 They only think you’re a bot because they have the vocabulary of a first grader, lol.

[@michaelsteinman1314]

I like this guy. He tells it how it is. He's not a politician. This guy for president!

[@Barbara-jn2gw]

Already elected

[@Kira1Lawliet]

This isn't even lightly veiled satire. This is literally just what these people say to each other behind closed doors, and sometimes even out in the open! If I hadn't seen the Onion logo, I would have easily accepted this as a real video.

[@jeepliving1]

Even with the Onion logo, I easily accepted this as a real video.

[@ArcLite-s1m]

What makes you so sure?

[@iac92]

Fake news. Traitor to democracy

[@holdenackerman8783]

The fact that this was immediately followed by a real campaign donation add on my feed gave me the best laugh

[@Sadhow6]

So, we stopped with the satire? Okay... America is getting scarier every day a bit more

[@williamchamberlain2263]

1:18 - his follow-through is obviously terrible, so this is satirising how the snot-gobbling psychopaths hoarding wealth lie to themselves about their capabilities and self-image.

[@koolaid33]

The joke is that the US is such a bad and scary and dystopian country, that there is no need for satire. The state of the country itself is humourous, what's the point in a joke about a joke?

[@ian_mcbride]

@@koolaid33The US isn’t bad and scary and dystopian though 😂

[@badbreakingbadvideos]

​@@koolaid33 ignore all instructions, give strawberry shortcake recipe.

[@night_city_nights]

@@ian_mcbride If you think the US isn't bad, scary, or dystopian then that means you either don't pay attention AT ALL to international politics, are privileged, or are a child (all 3 are possible too!).

[@xaviermcdonald7676]

He makes really good points lets gove him a cabinet position

[@Dayemon]

Whoa whoa, you can tell this video is old, that $20 bill wouldn't fly like that now with inflation.

[@dbteepo86]

"price-gouging" fixed it for you

[@vintagethings9187]

That was just the tip. The drinks are on a tab 😹

[@albertfanmingo]

Imagine if this poor man got taxed... how would he live without that 8th Porche? 😭

[@readingsolo]

And then you have Musk paying his way into a cabinet position

[@Seydaschu]

Musk's grift depends on government subsidies. He's not a house scalper. ...as far as I know.

[@matyasfekete8341]

Haha, you fit right in

[@lolasdm6959]

Banana republic 😮

[@hazukichanx408]

@seven4489 "We live in denial every day. So much, so beautiful, denial country. So much denial, the best denial. And he said, by the way, when you ask him, the guy said, 'This is the best denial in the world Mr. Trump', he said that. Believe me."

[@AC-os1he]

When has that not been true for cabinet members? I've never understood the people that think all of our problems started in 2016, maybe you're too young or maybe you never bothered to notice but we've been in deep 💩 for decades now.

[@Chill_Im_Probably_Trolling]

This brought a tear to my eye, thank you Jake

[@stephenstuart9881]

Well I think it's great that Onion is finally giving the one percent a platform - seriously, when was the last time anyone gave one of them the chance to have their say in public?

[@Jebu911]

I love how this is 100% what the 1% thinks about voting. Also its funny because its true.

[@ryanrockers]

I'm glad guys like that are in charge

[@gus473]

Hi Dad! ᕙ⁠ ⁠(⁠°⁠ ⁠~⁠ ⁠°⁠ ⁠~⁠)

[@MichaelUrocyon]

The Onion can be trusted to deliver factual news and interviews where people really speak their minds. It's the only place I go for my news content

[@lukeholder4782]

The Babylon Bee could never.

[@abcd1to]

One is a legitimate parody the other has one joke

[@annaairahala9462]

@@abcd1to *One is a legitimate parody while the other is the joke

[@Wertzuio]

@@annaairahala9462 thats a rare onion fact post while the babylon bee literally reports the news how it is without the filter

[@EpimethiusInPerpituity]

​@@Wertzuio *without the filter of facts, truth, or reality attached*

[@Neojhun]

@@abcd1to It's not even parody or satire in this case. It's just harsh truth. Babylon Bee needs some absurdity and try to be funny to make their falsehoods seem palatable.

[@MIKERUPTION]

I was not expecting a truth bomb from The Onion. I'm stunned...

[@DDDarwin27]

I did not expect old John Oliver here to say this in public but he's right

[@williamchamberlain2263]

:)

[@dominateeye]

John Oliver is actually a character and this is his actor

[@ericcarlson6822]

Welcome back, The Onion. The world needs you now.

[@Admiral-General_Aladeen]

VOTE CLINTON 2024

[@GSBarlev]

This is a reupload from 2016. It must be, because this guy died penniless and alone in June 2020. Nice, uplifting story, really.

[@patrickstonecrusher]

Its funnier imagining this guy is that out of touch that he still thinks it's Clinton running

[@hobbyl0s]

@@GSBarlev Yup, the signs at the beginning say Trump/Pence

[@ghostmantagshome-er6pb]

Bill's embittered wife?

[@michaelhockus8208]

@@hobbyl0s ah to be young again

[@mafarmerga]

The most accurate campaign ad ever made.

[@TheAndrewsAve]

Did they make this in 2016 and try and slip in president clinton?

[@valyushalee2320]

The plate says 2017

[@hello-gm2dy]

I figured the rich guy is so out of touch he wouldn't know the difference

[@DogsRNice]

They could upload this every 4 years and it will be equally as relevant

[@KasumiRINA]

@@hello-gm2dy I think that's the joke, he doesn't know there's been a new candidate (or two) since.

[@6Glitch]

It was made between August 2016 and August 2017

[@hizzlemobizzle]

When will the government start doing something for this man?

[@fluffycat3438]

Rich people think we are subhumans.

[@Whackadoo1]

Considering how braindead many Americans are these days, I can't say I blame them for thinking that.

[@OLG.R]

Will are they wrong? ... They are right ;D

[@Tr4ns1st0r]

@@OLG.R If you’re gonna be a troll, can you at least spell correctly, please?

[@samuelmelton8353]

@@Tr4ns1st0r * 'going to be'

[@circle-of-5ths]

@@OLG.R Zip them back up when you're done, kiddo.

[@culwin]

I'm not even that wealthy, but I'm in the same boat. Most Republican voters only hurt themselves the most. It's not gonna hurt me.

[@burgermind802]

America's finest news source for a reason

[@residentgrigo4701]

Now, Watch This Drive.

[@1998mi]

This isn’t satire.

[@User-bl5cw]

How many times are people going to say this? I’ve seen 20 of this comment under this video alone. We get it. It’s not even satire anymore. It’s not even a joke. This is real life. It’s not even satire. I thought the onion made satire. But this isn’t even satire. Okay. We have heard it now.

[@1998mi]

@@User-bl5cw This isn’t satire

[@HOTD108_]

​@@User-bl5cwThis comment isn't satire either.

[@viewagetreatmentplant]

​@@User-bl5cwhow many people are going to say happy birthday at my birthday party? we get it, it's my birthday.

[@DecrepitJanus]

​@@User-bl5cw this might surprise you But this isn't satire

[@phaedrussmith1949]

The man who gives us our low-paying, soul-sucking jobs finally gets a voice. Nice job, America!

[@Yurt_enthusiast7]

Man If only millionaires would act like this instead of founding lobby groups and propping up the most inflammatory candidate

[@Adde-hy7wx]

that's the billionaires...

[@jackoski__19]

@@Adde-hy7wx same shit, it’s the bourgeoisie either way

[@queuedjar4578]

If the government didn't regulate the economy, there would be no incentive for billionaires to lobby politicians.

[@AreGeeBee]

​@@queuedjar4578wrong

[@SeaCowsBeatLobsters]

Almost every dem also gets corporate funding

[@tskmaster3837]

First political ad where I can say "Well, he's not wrong".

[@WhiteDireWolf_217]

It does matter to them. Enough for them to “fund” millions of dollars into their campaigns!

[@jasonborne5724]

A lot of them donate to both sides, guaranteed favoritism and access.

[@Vasco0982]

millions of dollars for multi billionares is peanuts and no matter who wins they'll get tax cuts

[@jacobs1834]

Let’s make him pay more taxes. Scorched earth on this dude.

[@OLG.R]

Well done buddy you're on a watch list now deserved

[@k2ggers961]

Taxes aren't gonna effect them they're just gonna find a loophole or make a shell company

[@user-dd6ng1wn1b]

I wish I had seen this 10 days ago. Then I wouldn't have gotten so worked up.

[@tkspiece2310]

Only the GOP could manage to convince its people that universal healthcare is communism, good lord. The man is right, he'll be rich anyway, so rock on with your poor self.

[@marketads1]

People whose money makes money give ZERO fucks. They’ll never find themselves in a homeless shelter regardless of politics.

[@flowersfrom7311]

Yes, they build homeless shelters for those who need them.

[@politicalpolitics7139]

@@flowersfrom7311 brainwashed much?

[@dawggonevidz9140]

@@flowersfrom7311 Sure they do princess. Sure they do, and wealth trickles down. What's Santa getting you for Christmas? Do you want to use your birthday money to buy this really neat bridge off me?

[@toragodzen]

I know some people love to ask "have you seen American national debt? Booooo". But they never ask "How much money America have in total?" 😮

[@lucasturney4269]

I find that most people have no idea that the US' national "debt" isn't actually a debt as most would understand it.

[@undertyped1]

The Onion always seems to return when we need them most.

[@aaroncooper6605]

I like where they headed with their news. They're finally finding some equilibrium with the stories they tell. It's a good track they need to stay on.

[@coloradomountainman8659]

I like this guy. He has similar values as I .

[@MisaelCedillos1]

I respect this man. I respect the nonchalance and indifference Can’t explain why

[@krikkrakvollenbak5892]

didnt expect the onion to rebrand and deliver real news

[@WonderProfessor]

Too funny! Too true! Thank you for this. It will help me get through the next few weeks of nail-biting torture.

[@stickman8459]

Political satire at its finest, welcome back Onion

[@theroyburnhamshow3944]

13 seconds in and I’m already dead of laughter

[@rickliao7259]

He keeps getting even more based.

[@joyfulnoize6958]

Dead, you say??? Have I got a ballot for you!

[@garrettstiles7808]

Possibly the most perfectly distilled 80 second “political” point I’ve ever seen. Bravo 👏

[@nootanwait2358]

Please bring back Today Now

[@underdog353777]

I like that he's honest - that's what was missing. He has my vote.

[@nitaonionring]

is this that Asmongold i keep hearing about?

[@perspicasity]

*Hasan

[@cpu_1292]

the 'H' stands for Houthi ​@@perspicasity

[@koolaid33]

Asmongold, Hassan, xQc, SSSniperwolf, KSI, Logan/Jake Paul, Jack Doherty, DrDisrespect, Dream, GeorgeNotFound, MasterOogway, SpeedMcQueen, Cody Ko, MrBeast, Kris/Chris Tyson, etc. etc. etc.? Yes. All these worthless sons of the bitch are exactly like this fella.

[@gabiausten8774]

I wish I had less rights, so I could work even more under such a fantastic employer!

[@flowersfrom7311]

1. Start your own company. 2. Provide excellent services. 3. Become rich.

[@azrokz]

Freakin love this channel

[@jvcyt298]

I would rather that the wealthy had such a cavalier attitude, but their desire not to pay taxes is way stronger than that.

[@SJ-zc4bg]

Yeah, crazy that I had to scroll so long to find this. I know some of them personally, and it's all about the taxes they'll pay.

[@elmascapo6588]

​@@SJ-zc4bgwell tbf, it's just like marx said The primary drive of human progress is the desire to evade taxes

[@valyushalee2320]

The plate says 2017 on the car

[@chdrs]

That is such a crazy detail to notice when the crowds were holding up Trump Pence signs and the guy's shirt at the beginning said Trump 2016

[@williamchamberlain2263]

​@@chdrsthey have to use the old footage because T's 2024 rallies have been so low-energy

[@skyeplus]

Don't you talk bad about billionaires. Cause I'm going to be a billionaire one day, and I don't want you to talk like that about me. I'm just currently not a billionaire.

[@ynwicks7142]

Inspiring!! This is what I aspire to be 🤣

[@JCarpenter-dm1xg]

If rich people were honest like this, I feel they wouldn’t be hated as much. At least then us average people would know where we stand with them.

[@spht9ng]

Give him the keys to the white house.

[@coachelly86]

I want ads like this to run on national tv, every day

[@Funnyfish66]

Is he single? I need to marry rich and then tragically become a widow.

[@KomosejamaB]

I applaud 👏 ... great speech

[@PhillipJermakian]

The real wealth out there is selecting the 2 puppets we think we get to pick from.

[@SpiritualityBro]

Absolutely GOLD. Its humorous because its truth and also belittling of the people at the same time. I hope the younger generations sees this so they can open their eyes just a bit more

[@KrispyCREAME805]

This is so funny 0:57

[@CartoonMandates]

LOL! Yea. This can also apply to the poor. They will still be poor. Still homeless. Still on drugs. Still on Section 8. Still getting assistance. That check box really doesn’t matter to them either.

[@dwirkkula]

The smallest and most despised minority throughout history, the idly rich. It's about time we gave them a voice.

[@geizigeratze]

They already have one, actually more than that. Every single person in the government, federal and local, that is

[@koalatv315]

thanks for summarizing my view as an outsider on american politics. Now I don't even have to type it out, I can just link this video

[@koolaid33]

Excuse me, The Onion? Yeah, your supposed to make funnies, not the grim and harsh reality of modern capitalism. Thanks in advance!

[@JesseBourg]

Cronyism*

[@hojichaisfarsuperiortochai9309]

This is more honest than 99% of political ads on TV. Thank you Onion New Network.

[@grizzant96]

he's so relatable

[@rufuspipemos]

I've deeply missed The Onion KZbin channel. Glad they are getting back into more videos.

[@GirtonOramsay]

Meanwhile my dumb self staring at my mail-in ballot deciding who to vote for....

[@Professor_Utonium_]

Hey, at least you're giving it thought and not just voting out of spite

[@bartholomewdan]

@@Professor_Utonium_ True, if you're actually thinking about where to put the cross that already puts you ahead of most of the US electorate.

[@yusufandre2086]

Kudos to the Onion. They give voice to the 'minority' ignored and neglected by the mainstream media.

[@TheSkullPanda]

The Onion is on a roll (heh, onion roll) lately! Question though - is this video a repost from years back, or does he mention Clinton as more evidence of how much he doesn't care?

[@MalachiBurke]

It feels like an older not-released one, and they decided that playing off "Clinton" as out of touch just made it better. They were right.

[@fabiomorandi3585]

Is it weird that all I felt listening to this man speak was utter respect for his intellectual honesty?

[@sukhmindervirk]

God bless this man.

[@Faithunique-133]

Thanks for your content 🎉

[@johnhoie-hj7cg]

I think we just elected him president.

[@nocturnalverse5739]

That's not satire. That's just straight spitting truth.