The Parking Ticket Experiment | The Science of Empathy

[@kireifresca]

I can see how the “look on the bright side” can kinda seem like “get over it”

[@tianshan4381]

It depends how you do it I think, if you do really put yourself in someone else's shoes and genuinely try to feel how they are feeling, then the specific words you use aren't that important.

[@AlyJai]

His face at 2:01 is me 😂 what do you mean DID i pay it? I said what i said!

[@mariah_7654]

Aly Shep I laughed so hard at that. He could have been a meme.

[@zhulia]

Lmao so true

[@mariah_7654]

I hate it when people tell me to look on the bright side of things. When I've just been delt a huge blow I don't need your crappy silver lining. The "try to think positive crap never helps me feel better." I think most people say that so that they don't feel bad because they can't help make the situation better.

[@D0NCH33T0]

I agree wholeheartedly. Thinking "positively" won't solve the problem at hand, especially if it has to do with money.

[@KinleighClanton]

oh man I’m so bad at pranks I would’ve been smiling the whole time

[@mariellenstathopoulos967]

I finally know what to do to comfort people! Thank you!

[@maryannscheuer]

Right when someone is going through the pai, the best thing you can do is understand them and help them feel less alone. Yes, exactly this. Thank you!

[@HansBjorgman]

This reminds me of the movie Inside Out when Sadness comforts Bing Bong. 😊

[@AisforAesthetic]

You got me at the mention of Brene Brown. YES SOULPANCAKE! YES!

[@Bree8tiveBEing]

Anton Savellano Right! As soon as I heard Brene Brown, I liked the video. I knew it was going to be good.

[@hippestPOOterr]

yeah, I perked up so fast!

[@StubbornPrincessEmii]

Speaking in a empathy manner also applies to people who are depressed as well. Thanks for this video SOULPANCAKE. It helps people understand the difference between emapathy and sympathy.

[@rea8585]

Hehe, that is a good test on what works better. Sadly, we don't all have empathy to begin with, many people never learn it. But having empathy is not just useful for making other people feel good, it is also good for our personal benefit, because empathy makes us a better friend, co-worker, parent and boss. Because even being fired sucks a lot less if we get it with a dose of empathy. Been there, done that :))

[@greyrainbow9534]

Quick Fix empathy can save lives I am still waiting for the day but I will just keep going the way social reality makes people be and expected to act 😿👎🏳🌈

[@zuzannas3985]

Quick Fix also trying to be empathetic can sometimes feel like your problems are being belittled, like "i know how you feel" ....no you dont

[@LethalLemonLime]

This explains why I feel way more sad than I was to begin with when people sympathize with me. Especially when they pretend to have gone through what I'm going through but you can tell they haven't simply based on the fact that they're sympathizing instead of empathizing.

[@lashantacurry1728]

I'm sleep deprived and going through my KZbin's lists to structor my mind toward sleep and can't for the life of me understand why I categorized this video in a specific list that has nothing to do with the category. Like I feel like KZbin might have actually placed the content in my list so that I could learn about empathy. Harsh KZbin. Keep making these videos they make me smile.

[@Graycata]

I'd probably be like "b**** put it back on my car so I don't get another one!"

[@neurotripsy]

This is really interesting to me, because whenever I've tried to relate my experiences to my friends to make them feel better, I get told that inserting my own narrative is selfish/self-absorbed. For that reason I now just have to rely on empty platitudes like, "It'll be okay in the end!" :/

[@FireBride]

You can just say I had a similar experience (without going into detail) and then say, and I realize how ...frustrating or hard or annoying or worried..or scared or mad or sad it was..you get the point. And that will give people the option to ask for more details or not depending on the person.

[@seebee98]

This is one of the best episodes I've ever seen. SoulPancake is the best channel on KZbin! Thank you so much for the high quality work you guys do!

[@markafacreativesolutions9590]

Oh the way researches gaslight their subjects for a while 🙄😋😅

[@werewolfmothmanlove]

I tend to say look on the bright side kinda stuff because I want that person to feel better..I am glad I watched this so I can help myself help others better.

[@lyssaboo1513]

LESSON LEARNED: People love being able to relate to one another and connect emotionally

[@juliafamiglietti6402]

LOVE THIS NEW SEASON OF SCIENCE OF!!! Y'all do such a great job with these videos, I'm obsessed 😍😍

[@Participant]

Thanks so much for watching Julia!

[@BlueHen123]

Wow I learned something today! Thanks! I subbed because of this! ANd wait, 2M subs and never knew of you?! Good for you!

[@shealyngarvin4414]

Cut,cut,cut,cut,cut,cut,cut.

[@jacklighting3860]

This is why I subscribed to this channel. Thank you soul pancake!

[@Esen99153]

great to have this series back

[@MzRina88]

Totally unrelated to the subject but these men are some cuties!

[@incognito-qs8jg]

Woah that's cool! But I wonder if the sympathising method was done too abruptly

[@victoriaSantorsiero]

loving this series

[@shantanubharvirkar7759]

frikin...he's on to us

[@Participant]

lol

[@shantanubharvirkar7759]

SoulPancake I have no idea why did you reply to this specific comment..I wanna know

[@karikling8812]

I remember one time at Bible college my professor told me people don't want to hear stories when they're going through a hard time, but I long to hear people's stories in those moments because then I know I can relate to them. That's why I tell my stories after I've listened to them. I feel like Christian culture, which I'm a part of, often tells people to just think positively.

[@CrazzyCandyLovers]

This was such a great episode! I've watched you guys since 'the science of happiness' days and you have always been my favorite channel on youtube. I can always count on you guys to brighten my day

[@mar-better]

Where is the control? I want to compare how people would feel if the guy did nothing to sympathize or empathize with them, instead just letting the idea of the ticket sink in on its own. Would the subjects shown sympathy at least be a little less unhappy than the control subjects? You guys are leavin' me hangin' here lol.

[@pierezajosh]

Now I wanna know what's on that happiness test :D

[@lilyzemengist8091]

I agree empathy wins out and better for collectively and individual betterment. However, what if you genuinely haven't experienced something (s) another has experienced?

[@forisma]

That's sympathy though, not empathy, what you've been doing the second time. Different sauce, but still sympathy, not empathy. Sharing your own story of failure and so on = expressing sympathy. Check Brené Brown's short cartoon. Empathy, on the other hand, is just being present for someone and, if needed, help them unfold their feelings, and feel those feelings as well. That's empathy. You might have done that for them as well, but there was sympathy mixed in. That is very confusing.

[@warisane]

I thought I was the only one who caught that. I was so confused when i was watching that

[@a_bear]

This is true. I'm the kind of person who rarely opens up about my problems. This one time quite recently I opened up to one of my closest friends because I was having weird experiences with anxiety that were hard to deal with. It was horrifying. So I opened up to them and I don't think they understood. All I got was "ha I get those dizzy, tired feelings sometimes too". I undesrtand thst it's no one elses responsibility to deal with my own problems but it still made me feel pretty horrible. That one time I decifed to open up because I couldn't deal alone. Well I guess I will never open up again lol.

[@goldleaf3333]

We need to develop empathy for the suffering of other species, not only our own.

[@neverexisted8921]

Oh my god. I got the goosebumps! These are awesome findings!

[@sudhirpatel7620]

I always figure there is nothing I can do about the tickets, and it will be fun to go to court and represent myself. I can now dream of how I will prove myself righteous and triumph over the system, and of how I will learn something anew and adventurous. I just digest my problems like I digest food. It is what it is, and it cannot be otherwise. It is the accursed laws of nature. Love of fate. I will deal with that ticket problem/incident later. For now I am here to do an experiment on happiness. Let's go doctor. 😊

[@jordangiles4208]

Empathy and sympathy

[@ticklemelexii]

But what if you can’t empathize with them because it’s never happened to you?

[@NoizeTank]

Lexi you can still find a way to relate to them or imagine if it happened to you

[@HansBjorgman]

You can always say you're sorry it happened to them.

[@ticklemelexii]

But that's sympathy not empathy.

[@ticklemelexii]

What if their mom died and I've never had anyone in my life die? I can only sympathize.

[@NoizeTank]

Lexi that depends on what you’re saying

[@catowens1464]

lol "and for my own sick pleasure, BUT SCIENCE!"

[@christosmani]

Please, please, please make an experiment of how far can someone deny someone’s actions by saying “Did you?” after what they say :-p That was sooo cool when she said that and the reaction was like “Maybe I didn’t!!!” :-p

[@erickkimani8344]

its the feeling you get when you hear that your friend also failed the test hahahaah comfort

[@veevees1675]

I LOVE this video!! Such a good test and sooo true

[@mamastormborn5615]

I think there should be a balance between empathy and sympathy.

[@ashleyashleym2969]

Interesting I always find it annoying when people empathise and I always try and cut the convo short because I want to resolve the issue.

[@kristintrisha2616]

Empathy 💛

[@oOBookFairyOo]

YEEEEEES for BRENÉ BROWN!!!! Search her up on youtube and audible!!!!!!

[@AngelPersuasion]

Omg the light skinned guy is sooooo handsome 😫😍😍😍😍

[@chaelisa]

which one? There is two and both are handsome 😅

[@TriciawiththeTRUTH]

haha maybe they'll invite you to meet him on their "Tell My Story" series :-D

[@franmcverry9090]

Wait, just out of curiosity, could u time stamp it? I know this is 6 months late but, i liked your comment so, Please?

[@ndombologique]

Crazy! This was actually quite interesting.

[@AhmedGM51]

This video made me feel better

[@Participant]

Happy to hear it ;)

[@RandomlyFun]

At my school if someone’s upset peopl3 are just like well too bad for you

[@oceandelver]

solid episode!

[@empath3133]

Misery loves company for sure hahaha that's me Dx lol

[@Lauritonas]

Me : What happend? Friend : My mom just died. Me : Awe that sucks. You know it could have been worse. This would be me trying to empathize, im not good with human talking

[@taslimramzan8459]

Wow love these👍🏼👍🏼

[@Nastuhlee]

YES.

[@g3dr0cht]

Romans 12:15-16 NASB [15] Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. [16] Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation. Thats the bible for ya :)

[@michael_v2624]

I see a scishow of empathy on the horizon

[@aliceb2849]

What... so if we make OTHER people miserable, we feel better? Now that makes empathy seem worse.

[@NymphetaminexXxGrrrl]

What does telling someone to think about the bright side of things, have to do with sympathy? I always thought sympathy was feeling bad for someone and empathy was relating to how they feel and experiencing the pain with them. For example if someone's dog dies it would be sympathy to say "oh man that's so terrible! I feel so bad for you, that must be just awful" Whereas empathy would be saying "I also lost a beloved pet and i understand how they are just like family and how bad it hurts" From my experience people prefer empathy over sympathy, but i am trying to understand why they (in the show) depicted sympathy as telling people it could have been worse. That doesnt seem like a good example of sympathy to me. Either way even if they depicted sympathy as just feeling bad for someone, i still think the result would have been the same as empathy brings people closer and a person feels more validated when speaking to someone who truly understands. Still an interesting concept for a video. Bet these people were stoked not to have to pay a ticket!

[@benjaminmarker]

I didn't hear anything after 0:58 I'd pay his parking ticket any day.

[@wsade1]

wow !!!! very cool very cool !!! instant share !!!!

[@Mesa20101]

Awsome!!!

[@tess2082]

I always thought that joining in their feelings would just make it worse, and cancelling their feelings out a little would be better. Seeing it like this you seemed like a much nicer guy the second part. I should make some personality changes ;-)

[@sj33zy64]

great episode! but where's the control group?

[@Philosophantry]

Nuggie Dougie It's probably locked in a drawer somewhere, along with the tests for statistical significance and their methods for quantifying "happiness"

[@waterbottle118]

Nuggie Dougie how would you have a control group with this ?

[@Lisa-ex4wf]

Wouldn't the control still be that group because they still did that test before the parking ticket? It would still provide something to compare the differences from the independent variable and I'm pretty sure is a pretty standard way to collect data which is the repeated measures method.

[@mayalong2652]

Inside out: embrace the sadness

[@stephrainspirite9985]

wow super interesting. Thank you..Yes!!! 💗

[@ExtraSweetSour]

Soooo Empathy now Sympathy later

[@hkmsawwa]

Nice one! :)

[@daniellee5413]

telling someone to cheer up and look on the bright side isn't sympathy.

[@MelanieSAYSertiyu]

I probably shouldn't be watching this type of video knowing how much they frustrate me but it has left me really confused. I've seen a few of the series and get the point but they seem way too easy like showing the result they wanted to show, maybe that's just me (or the fact that they are so short loads must have been cut out). None are perfect bit this one particular left me confused because as I know the dictionary definitions or sympathy and empathy they were not given in the video and also used out of context. I've read comments about people not naturally being able to empathise but isn't that the thing to begin with? You can't empathise with something you haven't experienced or relate to, you can however be kind and try to understand, you sympathise. If you have experienced the same you can relate and empathise, it's to do with you YOU feel. This series has mainly focused on how you react to your feelings but tbh everyone needs something different in that situation. Some may like the "oh yeah I get it", I like going through solutions. Most people can feel empathy and sympathy, regardless, it's the way they act upon it and show it that varies. I struggle with this topic as it is I might just never be able to get it haha

[@pt5244]

What is the difference between empathy and sympathy

[@jay-leevanderberg8174]

I don't always like the empathetic way of sharing. When I'm talking about how I feel and then someone turns around and talks about their experiences it pisses me off. Like listen to me until I'm done venting. Don't tell me your bad luck story

[@karenrivera6017]

I really like parking tickets, they teach me to respect the rules of the road, I LIKE THE RULES OF THE ROAD

[@trystanklevmoen5263]

the one guy in the red shirt... his voice sounds like hes trying to make it lower than it normally is

[@shan-2756]

I'm sorry but I'm feeling some type of way with this light skin boy all up in my computer screen

[@helenmoran6689]

yall need to think through your experiments more cause almost all of them have some type of kinda major flaw

[@MinSugaCheonjae]

3:13 lady looks like Mrs. Wheeler from Stranger Things

[@Jennylop101]

What type of scientist does experiments like this?

[@peanutbutter7639]

It's Julian from Dnews

[@fabulouzpizza55]

1:18 ...how does a person wear those heals?!

[@davidsteere8293]

The sympathy group didn't really get a lot of sympathy though lol

[@joeymaneri2790]

anyone know the name of the outdo song

[@georgecataloni4720]

Are people stupid? I would LOVE someone brainstorming solutions with me! One time there was no solution to my problem, and I was very frustrated about it. Eventually someone helped me, which made it better. That's all I cared about. My gf at the time didn't feel the same about it as me, but that didn't matter. It didn't hurt, nor would it have helped otherwise. What mattered was that her mom helped me fix it. Her mom isn't empathetic, in fact, she may be sociopathic, because she has this way of manipulating people with faux emotions. However, it was that very ability that helped me! I don't need someone to tell me my emotions are valid. If you do, then I think you're lacking self-confidence, or something.

[@hi5_centipedes874]

This is why I can't eat animals anymore.

[@Asdf-wm4ow]

Tobiass

[@deniseoa]

Can we talk about how fine the mixed race guy is 😍

[@jscott8110]

Anyone here doing Covid-Sitel work?

[@HdramaTran]

haha did we see the same guy today? richard?

[@akberkhan6273]

Yes

[@Audrey_T]

Lool yup

[@TheLucyblades]

Great episode, really interesting content. But maybe try and not have annoying whistling looping in the background next time so I can actually listen to the whole of it properly? #notcheerful #Irritating

[@word.productions]

I FOUND IT

[@readyaimfirebreather2552]

his acting was so bad tho lol

[@Hubris1998]

Good luck finding that anywhere in real life

[@amelies2303]

Cutcutcutcutcut

[@Regimeshifts]

purple shirt and lip woman is very attractive

[@hackel137]

Aside from the small sample size, you had no control group! Pretending this is scientific is just absurd.

[@Lisa-ex4wf]

Ryan Hayle Wouldn't the control still be that group because they still did that test before the parking ticket? It would still provide something to compare the differences from the independent variable and I'm pretty sure is a pretty standard way to collect data which is the repeated measures method.

[@hackel137]

Lisa Le The control group should have retaken the test *without* trying to be cheered up at all, to establish a baseline level of fluctuation before taking empathy/sympathy into account.

[@Sofia-rw6my]

Second

[@emma-janeburian2165]

Third

[@tylercarlson1634]

First

[@ethanhoward3453]

Jesus this is soooo scripted. Everything is so exaggerated.

[@WaterspoutsOfTheDeep]

Bro get some new lenses that don't magnify your eyes or contact lenses if you want to be a host in videos far less to be talking about science in them. Like it's almost kinda pathetic. I mean the technology to compress lenses to reduce magnification of eyes for eye glasses has been around for over a decade now and offered pretty much everywhere and isn't even that much. Contact lenses have also been around forever.

[@evergreentree8042]

No! Don't do it! I see nothing wrong with your glasses, in fact I really like them. I'd be so disappointed if you changed them a lot or started wearing contacts. I find glasses soooooo attractive. I also have no idea what this troll is talking about, your eyes are not noticeably magnified. You do you and ignore the trolls. From a fellow glasses wearer.