The Problematic & the CRINGE | Autism Mom Memes

[@imautisticnowwhat]

Thank you sooo much for the lovely responses to last week’s video on Dyspraxia! 💛 I accidentally stumbled upon these autism quotes a few week’s back and I had to respond to them. There are more, so if you found this entertaining/interesting, let me know and I can definitely make another! Did they use stock quote templates for these or did they use stock quote templates? We’ll never know 😉 If you missed last week’s video on Dyspraxia, you can watch it here! If you’re as uncoordinated as me you might find it useful: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bpW8q2mmeM94r5o And if you want some Actually Autistic Memes as a palate cleanser, here’s the playlist! kzbin.info/aero/PLEHi2YmjD7gEssdqTn0247t_niQMt2b22

[@strictnonconformist7369]

Regarding one of them, I prefer the joke that’s not aimed at any particular type of neurology or expectations: “you’re unique, just like everyone else!”

[@dmgroberts5471]

Getting side-tracked by whether or not the pea thing is possible, is SOOO Autistic. 😆 And I very much relate.

[@m.otransformers4855]

Hilarious video

[@LaughKiKi]

Hi there! If you like, you could incorporate a tiny detail- the g in the name Asperger is pronounced like the g in garden. I enjoy your content very much. Thanks & greetings from Berlin

[@3mbracingautism]

Yes, I’m the same way. I am so like happy and not ashamed to say that I have autism now I’m no longer just weird there’s a reason for it.

[@diamond2773]

As an autistic person I can confirm that I am one thousand percent an angel who lost my way to heaven and fell on earth 🌍👼💕

[@sparklefulpaladin]

I mean, with my sense of direction (or lack thereof) and my tendency to trip and fall down stairs...

[@diamond2773]

@@sparklefulpaladin yes I can't direct 👼💕

[@enbyarchmage]

People have told me that I am an angel, but only as a compliment to my personality, not an euphemism for my neurotype. If someone ever euphemizes my autism, especially to my face, they'll regret it deeply...

[@RamonaGelosi]

​@@enbyarchmage I'm talking about special interest here: actually "fallen angels" according to the folklore, are angels that were expelled from heaven (so if we are angels on Earth...we did something bad😈)

[@enbyarchmage]

@@RamonaGelosi According to some branches of Judaism, angels are essentially aspects of God's will who were given a form of sorts in order to complete a purpose, not individuals with wills. So, if we're angels on Earth, that's because we're meant to do something that might not necessairily be good in the eyes of most. For example, Satan himself is - according to that view - not someone who rebelled against God, but rebellion itself. It's the personification of freedom, the aspect of God which allows moral compasses to exist and be tested. So, if we're fallen angels, that's bc we're meant to be free and test the bounds of social acceptability ;)

[@Waspinmymind]

I feel like neurotypical need to understand that using and item metaphor for autism is like using a car as a representation of a woman. Firm reminder no matter how disabled or able body an autistic person is we’re human. And should be addressed as that first before anything.

[@TinyGhosty]

Perfect example.

[@LuckySketches]

Ah yes, the ol' "You gotta treat a car like you treat a woman." "Go on." "...No. I sense I've made a mistake somewhere."

[@lisasteel6817]

I’m an autistic human.

[@dmgroberts5471]

@@LuckySketches I need to regard it at all times with wary caution, stash away apology gifts in case I anger it, and periodically bring it cute images of baby animals? 😜

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

What kind of car? I hope it's not a Fiat or Ford,

[@riry0ku]

"Doesn't mean you have to be a genius. You still deserve to live. Do I have to say this?" Yes. Yes please continue to say this. This struck a chord with how I've been feeling lately.

[@jaschabull2365]

That part around the 5-6 minute mark reminded me of how my being told, "Don't worry, Bill Gates and Einstein were autistic" led to my being determined to get perfect grades to make up for my autism, thinking it was my only hope to be an acceptable human being, to the point that I'd self-harm whenever I got any grade under, like, 95. I still struggle with the idea that if I can't be a "useful contribution to society", I'm therefore worthless T_T

[@carlpanzram7081]

So it motivated you by functioning as a role model you could identify with? That's... Great. Your idea that you are only valuable when you exceed academically is largely unrelated to that. It's more related to general confidence issues, which could have many causes. Imagine you didn't had that kind of guidance, and now you were autistic but academically unsuccessful 😂 Would you prefer that?

[@jaschabull2365]

@@carlpanzram7081 Your post insinuates that being autistic and academically unsuccessful would mean being a worthless person, no?

[@carlpanzram7081]

@@jaschabull2365 Not worthless but worth less. I mean, I'd rather be successful in something than be not successful. I'm sure you would have found yourself either way, even if you wouldn't have managed to be academically successful, but know this; Not everyone can be academically successful. You really worked with your potential here. If you hadn't had been pushed to be successful, you might had let your potential go to waste. This means something specifically to me, because the role I was given wasn't "you are autistic, autistic people make good scientists", it was "you are useless and a Failure". Not trying to generate pity here, I just want to empathize that you are given an identity by people either way, and it's actually a good thing to be motivated and pushed into your strengths. Nothing happens without sacrifice, atleast you were given something to make a meaningful sacrifice towards.

[@IJustAnimateThatsTheJist]

​@@carlpanzram7081+ Fucking yikes. If something is weighing on you in such a way where you turn to self harming than it's extremely harmful and shouldn't be recommended/encouraged in the slightest. That same exact line of reasoning is why "gifted" children peak in school and then flounder about after they graduate. Practically destroying your mental health because neurotypicals don't understand you and you want to go the extra mile to appease them is absolutely horrible. And where do you think they got those self-esteem issues? Parents should NEVER compare their children to another person because that essentially creates the idea in that individual's head that they "have to succeed" to be recognized and loved by the people around them. This whole comment is disgusting.

[@Anaea]

​@@carlpanzram7081 pretty sure the commenter would rather not self-harm themselves every time a small failure came their way

[@CharlyChinaski]

NTs: Man that Guy seems weird. Me ( aUtiStiC aNgEl WhO FeLl fRoM HeAvEn): B E N O T A F R A I D

[@thatonepossum5766]

This made me laugh. Thank you.

[@luvkiki444]

😭

[@doodleboop3742]

Lmfao

[@granautismo69]

Neurotypical mfs watching me morph into a foetus surrounded by rings covered in eyes

[@echognomecal6742]

*big ol' snort laugh!!!

[@demonhauntedplaygound4618]

There's a phrase in programming/coding, "It's not a bug, it's a feature", which I think that one w/ the glasses is a play on. In coding, it's something you say to someone when they complain about an aspect of a computer program, saying it's a bug, then the programmer says back to them 'it's not a bug, it's a feature' meaning, it's supposed to do that, it's not something that needs to be fixed. So saying that my ASD is a feature, not a bug (symptom) says to me that I'm supposed to be this way, I don't have anything wrong with me, which is kinda good I think.

[@marnenotmarnie259]

some of the most iconic features in certain games started out as bugs :D (minecraft's creeper, street fighter II's discovery of combos, mario's wall jump)

[@bigboomer1013]

Going to use that for a story I'm trying to write avout autism

[@lorilimper5429]

I love this perspective. Thank you!

[@mikethegoo]

​@@marnenotmarnie259the rocket jump from TF2 as well... Also, Wall-jomoing was originally a bug?

[@wintergray1221]

@@mikethegoo I definitely exploited the backjumping trick in Pokemon Scarlet and Violet.

[@jeanettehargis5244]

One of my autistic students showed me a meme once that I absolutely agree with. It basically said that tomato sauce has many ingredients, but tomato is a giant part of it. Without the tomato, it wouldn't be tomato sauce. Similarly, we autistics have many facets to our being, but autism is such a large part of us that if we weren't autistic, we wouldn't be the same person.

[@TheRojo387]

One of your LIVESTOCK.

[@derAtze]

​@@TheRojo387wow okay that escalated quickly

[@Qhartb]

That reminds me... I really want to try mushroom ketchup sometime.

[@PyreOManiac]

@@TheRojo387 damn i wish i had livestock, yum yum yummy

[@alexspencer6408]

Oh yeah the 'tism sauce (sorry, I thought it would be a funny joke)

[@arlecchino4004]

I feel like so many undiagnosed neurodivergent (and queer) afab people had the "I'm not like other girls" stage lol

[@ShipperTrash]

I mean we WERE different, but we didn't know why so we latched on to superficial things lol

[@CeruleanStar]

Personally, I've never liked the hate around the "I'm not like other girls" mentality. While not everyone goes through this stage, it's still a perfectly normal stage of development for many kids and teens. It just feels to me like people are bullying kids for being kids. Not only that, but giving that mentality hate could cause some girls not to pursue why they think they're different or don't fit in, which could lead to girls not being diagnosed with things they should be. Making children afraid to speak up about feeling different doesn't seem like a good idea to me.

[@LunarWind99]

@@CeruleanStar completely COMPLETELY agree! 💯

[@HiBuddyyyyyy]

I had the main part of that phase when I was around 6-7 (except for the appealing to men part because I was a child in primary school). I think I was really lucky to get a lot of it done with earlier.

[@arlecchino4004]

@@CeruleanStar I agree, but the problem in the "I'm not like other girls" mentality is the hate towards the other girls. The "I'm different" is not the problem, the "I'm good, you're bad" is

[@bigb333]

If you enjoyed learning the difference between an initialism and an acronym, you might also enjoy the fact that when an existing word (like autism) is turned into an acronym, it is called a 'backronym'!

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

And while we're at it. Backronym is itself a portmanteau of back and acronym.

[@jimwilliams3816]

@@SmallSpoonBrigade Thanks! I was only ever familiar with the first definition of portmanteau. The second definition is MUCH more interesting and useful.

[@squish154]

Help, I can't read. Like technically I can, but I can't process what you're saying.

[@bigb333]

@@squish154 Which bit/bits are you struggling with?

[@squish154]

@bigb333 I'm fine now, I just came back to it, and my brain has better focus now. I think it might have been because I was trying to listen to the videos at the same time as reading. But, I got it now. Thank you for helping, though.

[@TheTheisson]

the first one sounds more like the backstory of satan tbh. who was an angel that was thrown out of heaven.

[@imautisticnowwhat]

Yesss - when I was editing I was thinking what did these angels do to lose their wings?? 😅

[@alexchriston251]

all demons are autistic

[@SR-fu7ty]

Exactly what came to my mind too, the backstory of Lucifer. 😆

[@claudiamcghin3419]

I thought this too. So we're fallen angels? 😂

[@CyranofromBergerac]

​@@claudiamcghin3419Nah, demons are all autistic but you're probably not a demon. You need a blood test to determine if you're a demon.

[@carole5648]

"No you can't have fun your way, you have to have fun our way." Omg you summed up my whole life.

[@AstarothFox]

Teacher talking to a kid playing alone at the side of class: "You have to come play with the others and have fun." The kid: "But I was having fun."

[@seiya-chon]

Reminded me how I was forced by my family and my teachers to go to a finalist party at school. I wasn't friends with anyone, and I knew I just would get exhausted. Plus, I was already participating in a talent contest at school, so that would collide with my plans. But my teacher was like "You're such a good student, you deserve to have fun!" So, I managed to attend both the talent contest and the ball and... I had fun. I hated the music bc it's not what I enjoy listening to, and it was so loud that my ears hurt. Aside from that, I was wearing a dress with an exposed back, and it was cold even with a jacket on, so I had to suffer with a sore throat for 4 days. Thank you, everyone, it was the best day of my life.

[@SteinGauslaaStrindhaug]

I love that card with the quote by "They" 😂

[@SuzetteMorganStudio]

This is an interesting mix of misinformed cringe and thought provoking ideas. I can really relate to many of your personal tangents.

[@aborch7]

Agreed!

[@duikmans]

About that angel that fell to Earth. If I remember correctly, the last time that happened, that angel had been banished from heaven after a quarrel with his boss...

[@hatetheusername]

gods ableist 🙄

[@generalhorse493]

Yeah Vishnu, Raider and Guan Yu formally complained to God about that.

[@laurenjb7]

Why is it so hard for parents to just talk about their children as if they are human beings?! Like we either get the autismspeaks version where parents openly talk about how their autistic child ruined their life and is a nightmare, or we get this autism is a superpower or genius stuff, which is a lot of pressure. I didn't get my ASD diagnosis until adulthood, but my mom dove head first into the whole indigo child bullshit for my ADHD, and I was just recently talking about the absurdity of it with her and she just didn't see how toxic it is.

[@powderandpaint14]

I think it's because a lot of parents see their children as both their possession and also an extension of themselves. So when they have a child who isn't what they expected they find it very difficult to accept, sadly.

[@stephaniefogelvik4756]

The indigo child stuff is really damaging and just wrong, I think I remember being called that. Very creepy, really. Parents mean well, but they need to be mindful of what they buy into.

[@markwright3161]

I understand the toxic positivity view of calling it a superpower, but I don't think it's quite as bad if you imagine basically any comic superhero/character with a superpower functioning in the real world. Imagine the Hulk. If someone had that result to a hightened heart rate, then developed anxiety about their superpower, every single time they would be in a public setting their heart rate would go up and they could end up transforming and doing a lot of damage, so such a person would probably isolate themselves from society or be isolated by society if they persisted to be involved in social settings and occasionally wrecked a building from an anxiety attack or over exerting their human form in a standard work scenario, causing the increased heart rate then transformation. Superpowers in the real work would be disabilities.

[@orbismworldbuilding8428]

I agree, thats how i think about it. Ive wanted to make comics and draw paraleles between superpowers functioning realisically and disability, or outright involving disability or illness to use them. A character with spiderman like reflexes is also hypersensitive, anxious, flinchy and hates being in crowds Someone with super strength has to spend constant energy to not break anything and has to be super careful Etc.

[@jimwilliams3816]

That’s basically the premise Marvel Comics established back in the day (my youth, the sixties). Superheroes as “misfits.” It was in the early days of the civil rights movement, and the X-Men were created as a super powered version of race relations, in their case feared and dehumanized because of their powers. The X-Men was a group working to change perceptions of mutants as a group, living under the cover of a “school for gifted children” where Professor Xavier taught them to control their powers. I think the premise came partly from Stan Lee being Jewish - especially the Sentinels, who were essentially a giant robotic SS. But apart from that, as I think about it now, much of the premise matches well with what has now become the autism community. Thank you for pointing that out! ETA: thinking about it, I suspect it was actually Jack Kirby (also Jewish, and a big thinker very oriented toward social justice) who developed the concept. It's more in keeping with Jack's character, and story ideas than Stan's.

[@orbismworldbuilding8428]

@@jimwilliams3816 yep!

[@markwright3161]

@@jimwilliams3816 Thank you for sharing that information. I didn't know the origins and found that very interesting.

[@Voidwielder]

@orbismworldbuilding8428 Reminds me of that "World of Cardboard" Superman speech

[@Layka-be3bz]

Gardening is one of my special interests! That orange pea looks like it was photoshopped. I’ve never seen one orange pea like that, though I can’t say for sure that it has never happened. That sort of thing does happen. We have a ton of bachelors buttons right now and they are all deep purple except one single flower that is a light blue. Though I think if I was making a graphic to go with a Temple Grandin quote, I’d probably do something like a herd of cows where most are one color, but 2%+ are a different color?

[@imautisticnowwhat]

That's a much better idea!

[@orderthruchaos]

15:50 I think this may be a reference to the original genetics work done by Gregor Mendel on pea plants: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mendelian_inheritance

[@kkso3318]

I like the meme about high/low functioning because most of the world, especially the medical model, still uses those words. This person has taken the words most use and given an idea of how the world responds to the labels they use.

[@lisasteel6817]

When I was diagnosed, I was diagnosed as level 1, “high functioning”. I am now very much NOT “high functioning”, I wish people would stop using that term.

[@dmgroberts5471]

I'm technically "High-Functioning" but I wouldn't say I'm functional. I can "pass" as a Neurotypical...right up until I take a sharp left turn into the uncanny valley and freak out the normies. I can hold down a job...for about a year. I can socialize...with people I already know. Basically, I function right up until I run out of energy or hit a wall, and then I become a personification of the Blue Screen of Death.

[@kkso3318]

@dmgroberts5471 I completely understand. Please understand that I'm not saying I agree with the labels. I don't. Please read what I'm saying and don't assume what I'm not saying. I will try this another way and hope it cannot be further read into: since the world refuses to throw away those labels, it is good to have people explain them in the way mentioned in the video. The reason this is good is because it causes people to think differently of those labels and is a step toward NTs realizing they are stupid.

[@dmgroberts5471]

@@kkso3318 Oh I agree with you. Please read my comment as supporting your argument.

[@kkso3318]

@dmgroberts5471 Thank you for the clarification. My apologies for taking your comment the wrong way. I feel much the same as you that I have passed as NT for so long but not really. It has really helped me hearing people say that they used to think of themselves as broken NTs when in reality, they are perfectly fine NDs. I definitely feel that statement. A few years ago I had asked my MD to refer me for adhd/Autism testing and her reply was that she'd definitely refer me for the adhd but if I'm autistic, I'm "high functioning" so, no. About a year after that I had a complete shut down that I think could've been avoided had I understood I could learn about Autism on my own and live my life in the ways that would help me survive as autistic. I do see it as very damaging. I hope it changes.

[@dinosaurs_rule]

I love how you didn't pass judgement on the 11 year old's quote. Your videos are all so lovely and really just feel like such a safe space

[@purplebean7]

Hi again! This is like the third time I've run into you on youtube! :D

[@dinosaurs_rule]

@@purplebean7 Hi!! I guess we're very similar people lol. It's crazy how we keep seeing each other :)

[@Zeelovesdinos]

I love your username and profile picture!

[@fh5926]

Positivity quickly becomes toxic when it fails to reflect reality. Reality isn't just a matter of perception. When perception and reality don't match, damage happens. You can change your attitude toward what you perceive. It can be years of work to do so. But first, you need to accurately perceive the truth in order to do anything about it. With children, there will always be this balancing act between protecting them from the cruelty of the world and preparing them to navigate it.

[@lisasteel6817]

If only my mother was toxic positive instead of toxic negative I wouldn’t be so fkd up…

[@SingingSealRiana]

​@@lisasteel6817Sure about that? That never allowing you to Express anything negative cause ITS a Gift and you should BE thankful for it and such?! You do Not See a Problem with ist at all?

[@lisasteel6817]

Mum?

[@PurpleAmharicCoffee]

Diagnosed at 8, I grew up with very negative sterotypes around autism and struggle to label myself as autistic. I am learning to shake the negativity but it takes a lot of thought and time.

[@andromeda_va39]

Ok time for me to grow six wings and a bajillion eyes and start screaming "FEAR NOT" whenever I enter a room

[@lidu6363]

I don't know if someone already mentioned this (I don't wanna lose the thought) but the first quote seems to be a reference to "indigo children" phenomenon which was an escapist hypothesis made up by parents who felt incompetent to take care of their children who behaved differently from what the parents expected... (popularized somewhere during 90s)

[@orbismworldbuilding8428]

The indigo child thing evolved into the current starseed thing too, and ive noticed that everyone calling themself a starseed either wants to be unique or is neurodivergent but lacks the language for it

[@NekoChanSenpai]

Quick breakdown of what the term means?

[@juicyparsons]

i forgot about that era

[@juicyparsons]

@@NekoChanSenpai it was kinda a woo-woo new-age-y way for parents to highlight "special abilities" of their kids like clairvoyance or high sensitivity or creativity....some of it seemed like it was addressing important differences but some of it got into kinda attention-seeking hippie-dippie stuff or pseudoscience lol

[@juicyparsons]

@@orbismworldbuilding8428 and for more context the 90s was a time that everybody was on TV trying to be a psychic or see ghosts and whatnot so this paired nicely with that

[@TinyGhosty]

I am always happy to find an autistic creator that aligns with similar opinions about autistic things. I wanted to share some relevant thoughts to something you brought up. I think autistic girls/women have an extra layer to the whole NLOG phase. It is more than wanting to break out of gender roles and be an unique individual. The extra layer is feeling othered by other girls/women while trying to socialize, or being unable to. Not fitting in with boys could be explained away due to the supposed differences between girls/boys. While not fitting in with other girls can feel more drastic and isolating. Being autistic adds countless more reasons why a young girl would feel completely different from what "other girls" means.

[@Catlily5]

I felt with many other girls that they rejected me so I rejected them.

[@ohkaygoplay]

This explains why every time I try to socialize and copy what I think I should do ends up in catastrophic failure every time. Even if I dress like them, look like them, and act like them, I still feel othered, because I'm wearing a costume - a character in order to not be rejected.

[@Catlily5]

@@ohkaygoplay Yes, and they can sense that we are wearing a costume or see that we are different underneath it.

[@TinyGhosty]

@@ohkaygoplay Agreed. If you have to mold yourself to others and mask your autistic traits, you are not yourself. Feeling like you need to put effort into being a chameleon for approval is dehumanizing.

[@redtailarts101]

Yeah this is... True. It's uh. It was a coping mechanism for me. Didn't have friends, so I convinced myself I was above that, and that I was better than everyone else because I was so different and not like them..

[@meaganfarr2]

I think neurotypical people in general don't realize that certain wordings and phrases could be seen as...problematic or uncomfortable? I feel like more parents are trying to learn about autism now, which is honestly fantastic and I'm happy to see parents focusing on providing their kids with a world that works around them and not the other way around. Thanks to the recent wave of parents changing their views of autism, plus more and more people learning from sites that actually see autistic people not needing to be fixed, I think the more troublesome quotes will phase out over time. It's honestly heartwarming after growing up in a world that saw autism as this horrible, devastating tragedy that needed to immediately be eradicated through "fixing" them.

[@AstarothFox]

I think Autism Speaks is the crystalization of that misguided drive.

[@quercus432]

I totally agree with using the words "absolutely unbelievable" to describe autisme. It describes my expérience perfectly. I cannot country the number of times people just wouldn't believe that my issues were real, that I couldn't control them, that I wasn't being rude on purpose, that I was trying, it just didn't work, etc. So, yeah, I gurus I am unbelievable.

[@lemonymidnight]

hi! I don’t know if you’ll see this, but I showed my stepmom one of your videos and her first reaction was saying how much the way you talked reminded her of me :) she called you my doppelgänger! (she made sure to specify that she wasn’t being literal, and wasn’t referring to your accent lol) it made me really happy to hear, if you are living happily and independently, maybe I can too :D I just turned 17 and it’s been a really big fear of mine that I won’t be able to live on my own in a few years when I’m an adult, and it’s been causing me a lot of stress… but your videos make me feel better, and give me confidence that I will be able to do it, even if it’s not in the traditional “normal” way :3

[@strictnonconformist7369]

Learn “adulting” skills like keeping track of your finances, paying bills, cooking, cleaning, etc. and most important to remember: you may grow to be old with lots of wrinkles and grey hairs and still feel like a kid. I’m almost 52, and I still in many ways feel like a kid, and I suspect more adults feel the same but are afraid of admitting it. Yes, I’m autistic, but I don’t know if that matters regarding the feeling like a kid aspect.

[@kalt1976]

You will be okay. Don't stress about it. I'm a mom of a 17 year old autistic boy and I promise you, you will be fine. Be gentle and patient with yourself. It is 100% okay to need more time. Comparing yourself to others is useless, listen to yourself instead. You will be okay 😊

[@Beckyg1016]

You can do it, if it is a goal you have - but remember that all things on YOUR time line. Just because other people move out at 18, doesn't mean you have to. Take your time, learn the skills, maybe ease into it by staying in your own place a couple days of week and returning home the other days, or living in your own space but accepting help from parents/friends/hired assistants where you need it - NO SHAME in any of that! You will find the best way to live YOUR life and that is all that matters!

[@tachysphex4095]

16:03 Forest Engineering major here. I know more about insects than plants, and I haven't gone too deep into genetics, but I think this is very unlikely to happen. Pea seedpods can vary in color depending on variety and other factors; they can be green, yellow, dark purple... But just one seed happening to be a different color? Nope

[@shockthetoast]

I believe the differently colored one is the queen pea. The others are, or course, her peons. 🙃

[@virre1981]

Beeing Euphoric about beeing Autistic is an interesting idea. I don't think its exactly a symptom but I think you are into something with "I am happy I am not just weird" because that was the same I felt when I got my diagnosis at 25 years old was such a relief from that old feeling of "I just feel outside everywhere" to at the best times "I am different because of Autism" and at the worst "I just feel outside and not fitting in but at least I know why" (Also because I write this during the video, there most be a reason so many of us are vegan)

[@enbyarchmage]

That's pretty damn similar to something common in Transgender people: gender euphoria. It happens when someone realizes that they are being perceived as their gender and/or when their appearence feels particularly close to the gender they consider ideal. Closeted trans folks - a vast portion of whom are Autistic or otherwise neurodivergent - tend to feel outside everywhere too. And maybe so many of us are vegan because of some combination between caring deeply for animals, sensory differences and whatnot.

[@froggykimmy]

Gosh I feel that! Knowing why helps accept yourself so much more. My autism diagnosis only gave me more freedom to be more and more okay with myself and how I behave in the world! Yeah I'm weird because I'm autistic! And I love it!

[@lisasteel6817]

@@froggykimmyexactly! I’m glad you love who you are!

[@rosykindbunny1313]

I felt that way too when I got my ADHD and anxiety diagnoses

[@franki1990]

I'm really interested in the vegan mention. When you get to watch and feel empathy for those being mutilated and slaughtered you can't ignore that, as so many neurotypical people are "able" to do. That was my case, anyways, I stil ate meat, but any nerve or detail that reminded me it was a corpse made me angry and I refused to eat. Maybe it was just a sensory thing, but I take into account how I felt when I heard pigs scream while being killed. I felt the world was ending, and in a way it did.

[@___FS___]

I think the fact that I've always found autistic people really likeable took away any of the shock factor/negative stereotypes when I eventually realised I was autistic, so I feel like I got to skip a stage..

[@nonamelegend_vapor]

As a teen in the early 00s, I was one of those who fancied myself "normal" for the most part, since I had a (in retrospect, pretty inclusive) friend group but always found myself having conversations with the clear "weirdos" that nobody else talked to. Later on in life, I would be on KZbin in the comments of old Weather Channel or news videos and think "wow, I'm the only normie here". Needless to say, finding out I myself was not, in fact, a normie made so much sense, almost to the point where I (unfortunately) began to wonder if I was "that friend" in my groups of friends lol

[@TinyGhosty]

LOL the conversation with your Mom was a great addition to the video!

[@ashvander7864]

One of my favorite things to do with other autistic and/or adhd people is parallel play where we'll both sit in the same room playing our own games or doing our own projects without requirement of helping each other out or talking to each other unless we feel like it and it can be really fun giving each other space to enjoy our own interests but then also getting into super long detailed discussions when one of us thinks of something or we notice something in common with our respective interests!

[@jonnyblaze2692]

My son is very vocal with his stimming. Always humming a soundtrack to his life. I can relate to the meme about not paying attention to the stares, for me, however I know my son is fully aware of his surroundings even when it appears he isn't

[@promisemochi]

thank you for knowing your son so well and knowing that he is aware of his surroundings even when he doesn't "look" it. i got my autism diagnosis at 30 and i can't even tell you all the trouble i got in for seemingly not paying attention or coming across as "flighty" (toss in some misguided stereotypes of girls into the mix of ableism why don't we lol) especially for homework, it was always a stress and my stim would be to flip and twirl the ends of my hair. i was always getting in trouble for not taking it seriously enough or paying "full" attention. but i was! this translated into people thinking they could say and do hurtful things because i wouldn't "understand" anyway. ahh sorry to just spout off on a whole rant here, but i truly appreciate you taking the time to know your son and know how he interacts with the world around him in his way.

[@dxrksykes]

I got diagnosed about half a year ago but always knew I was different, now I finally have a name for it and I'm learning to understand myself better. Getting late diagnosed at 25 I don't really have people around me that can relate nor any professional help but your channel is really helping me. thank you for making this content! ❤

[@joyful_tanya]

I was "late diagnosed" at 54!! 😮

[@StorkClips]

"We're Angles from Heaven" it's directly corrolating Autism with innocence.

[@rbark2311]

I really enjoy listening your pronunciation of English. (I'm not an English native speaker and foreign languages are one of my autistic special interests)

[@imautisticnowwhat]

That's so kind! Thank you 💛💛

[@lurji]

so real thats my special interest too

[@jmfs3497]

Does anyone else have Hyperphantasia? I know everyone is different. I have vivid mental imagery and it helps me with my job. I can do work in my head where ever I am, and then I show up to do the physical job and people get upset and say things like "Beginner's Luck" and it's just my brain does the work rapidly in like a dream state without me trying. I couldn't stop it if I wanted to, it does it. But that "superpower" also makes me horrible at 2D alphanumeric information. I can read and write, but have trouble staying focused and get easily overwhelmed by paperwork because all the symbols don't really mean anything natural to me. Objects are great because they are based in physical space and time, but the words and numbers just look like blah blah blah blah blah.

[@camellia8625]

Sounds like an amazing attribute to have! I am aphantasic myself with no ability to see visual imagery in my mind except for in dreams.

[@AlsoReading]

Reminds me that I would always bring a book out to recess in middle school. I still remember one little jerk jeering"It's playing time, not *reading* time" to make his friends laugh. Being diagnosed as a child really would have been nice.

[@aeternumiudexem]

As an autistic. Autism is crazy like- i can write 11 pages in 45 minutes about my hyperfixation.. but it takes me 4 days to complete 3 page assignment 😭

[@drtaverner]

"Stim freely, it is lovely" literally made me cry. 50 years of hiding and suppressing my stims, getting shit for stimming (even as an adult), it's just... amazing to hear someone not only say it's OK, but to call it lovely. Thanks for that. ❤

[@Mondomeyer]

To be fair, the ability to think for one's self and apply critical thinking does seem like a super human feat to neurotypicals.

[@SingingSealRiana]

Yeah . . . .Sure feels that way sometimes

[@nonamelegend_vapor]

I get it though, in a way. For most folks, being part of the "herd" = survival, and survival is about as base of an instinct as you can have. So it's probably a lot harder for NTs to hold (and moreso to openly profess) ideas that run counter to those around them for that reason, unless they can find a way to spin those ideas in a socially acceptable way, which could vary depending on their society. I don't envy this mentality, but I get it

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

I think people sometimes forget about just how many normal abilities in NT folks can appear to us. Sure, there is a bunch of stuff that we do that can seem like magic, but none of it is particularly unexplainable. It's no more miraculous than NTs ability to actually plan something and expect for the plans to work out if they need to make adjustments as they go.

[@dmgroberts5471]

I've always been astounded by how they can just walk up to people they don't know and introduce themselves, and just... _join the conversation._ My late wife was neurotypical, and she could casually do stuff in a social setting that I could never do. No practice, no awkwardness, no pre-planned protocol, nothing.

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

@@dmgroberts5471 I can relate. I came pre-programmed to count cards, but even after decades of trying, I still haven't figured out how to walk up to somebody and start a conversation.

[@theresat4782]

I recently discovered that habits are not just routines, but are actually things people do with little to no thought. All these years I thought people were joking when they talked about "going on autopilot" and showing up at work but not remembering the drive. Then I talked to my token neurotypical friend and yeah, turns out that's actually a thing. He doesn't think about washing his hair, it just gets washed. I'm the weird one because I have to think about Every. Single. Thing. I do. Mind blown.

[@wildernessisland2573]

@@theresat4782 seriously??? they like black out and don't have to make themselves do things???? ok i knew i wasn't normal before, but if that's normal, i'm from an alternate universe lol

[@theresat4782]

@wildernessisland2573 I don't know that they black out so much as they can just devote that bit of brain power to something else. So like with that neurotypical friend I mentioned, we were both in marching band in high school. He competed at a much higher level than I ever did, but now he's all impressed with me because he says there's no way he could have done it if he had to think through every step every time. He could focus on other things because he didn't have to consciously think "Ok, stand still for four measures, then forward six steps, left four steps, backwards on the trill, and don't walk into Jennifer this time."

[@CannaToker420]

I just got diagnosed a couple weeks ago at 28 years old, after years of addiction and misery. I always thought I had severe social anxiety. I never even considered autism. It’s really hard to process right now. I’m hoping it’s step closer to healing

[@Renfeng4]

I'm autistic and I can guarantee that when I was a child I was the furthest thing from an angel.

[@wintergray1221]

I definitely acted like I had multiple heads and sets of eyes.

[@natashabrown4790]

Same. Was a clawer and biter.

[@thegpshowtheshow]

Young me was learning about the deceleration of human rights in early high school and the teacher said that there was a separate one for people with a disability so me in my semi masked genius who was fairly open about my nerodiversity (I was aware of Austin but not my ADHD at the time) said 'Wait just a minute! I'm not a human? And nobody told me!' the teacher had a lot of explaining to do. 😂😂

[@TheHamishX]

My husband and I are autistic and he got all the luck lol. He is super smart with tech and mechanisms. Very savant lol. All I got was a damn anxiety disorder.

[@nonamelegend_vapor]

"I went to [the doctor and got formally diagnosed with ASD] and all I got was this stupid T-shirt" 😂 I feel that sometimes

[@muirgendoyle7595]

Unrelated to autism, but in defense of group projects: I think it helps young people to see what it's like having to do something important when you're on a team and can't get out of either the task or the group. It's a real-world situation, and exposure to it helps. Like so many other elements in school, it can be a valuable teaching technique if it's handled skillfully by the instructor. The real problem with group projects is, in my opinion, that the teacher wasn't adequately prepared or trained to run it so that the students could profit from it.

[@Ignasimp]

I've been reading that the opposite is true. For ADHD and autism grup work is counterproductive to their learning. Of course then need to learn to deal with groups because that is a learning experience for when they have to work with more people in the future, but when it comes to learning the specifics of a subject, they learn much better on their own or with one or two more people at most.

[@Jolinda11]

Many of those have the same... misguided, yet well intentioned (but inherently ablist) vibes as people trying to make 'handicapable' a thing. I'm an autistic disabled person and that's alright. Thank you for your content. I appreciate your approach & the grace you allow for everyone to be where they are whilst speaking your truth & experience. You're truly lovely!

[@delanybell5613]

I once got clocked by the receptionist at my DR’s office when I told him I was there for my ADHD treatment and he asked me if I thought I was autistic. The answer caught me off guard so I just answered honestly and said I wouldn’t be surprised and had my suspicions. So he then went on about how a lot of ppl w adhd also have autism and how autistic people are geniuses and savants especially creatively and how there’s a theory that Mozart (I think) was autistic. The whole time I was sitting there wondering why he felt the need to tell me these things but I think he was trying to, like, comfort me? Like “don’t worry if you have autism because it’s a good thing actually!” Or something like that. Idk it was a very strange interaction and I still feel like something flew over my head lmao.

[@tomteanders1357]

On that angel thing: My favourite quote from myself is: We autistic are cats encaged in human bodies. Many of our community could relate to that, with a sense of humor.😂

[@robinmacfarlane9719]

I definitely used the “I laugh cause you’re all the same” when I was a teen. It definitely had multiple different memes associated with it.

[@vazzaroth]

RE: The poppy. Google "tall poppy syndrome". It's a sometimes narcissistic but sometimes true theory about how people who are gifted or different get 'cut down' to make a nice bouquet. The tall poppies get culled. I do think there's an idea of neuro-jealousy there, along with being the same reason that introversion is villainous in general pop situations like school. What I've learned is that the NT technique is to state problems+observations out loud and wait to see if others solve it. By this way, a group of 2-5 ppl will all contribute and, theoretically, solve an issue none of them holistically understand. When an introvert or autistic is involved who wants to see the outside world, drag it inside to process, then come back with a product, an answer, it throws that whole dynamic off and makes extros uncomfortable b/c they simply don't have the focus or attention to their inner world (without training, practice, education) to do that naturally. It's actually b/c quietly working on problems is SO rewarded by society and nature that the extros bully the quiet, in an animalisic (and therefor at least somewhat natural) impulse to 'balance' the scales.

[@wintergray1221]

There's a similar saying. "The nail that sticks out gets hammered down." In this case, it's the one acting against the crowd that is actually sticking out. I can't say I agree with your theory of bullying being an instinct to save face. At least in my experience, introverted behavior is seen as non-conforming, and being disinclined to socialize goes against the common human nature of, well, socializing. All of that leads to being labeled as "other", and then tribalism (favoring the in-group) kicks in. Though it is certainly a possibility for people to be jealous of someone for having traits or skills they don't have.

[@lizbakeslemons940]

LOLL the "mesmerizing" text exchange was very important thank you for including it 😆🤣

[@julierosie62]

‘That’s the result of a group project’ is a classic! I must remember that, utterly brilliant! ❤

[@pokerynia]

Before diagnosis, I was weird. Now I’m autistic and weird.

[@MsSmash1989]

I'm a parent of a diagnosed level 3 autistic daughter. I find you're bombarded in the medical community of your child's deficits, and that seems to be the main focus. Some of these inspirational quotes are definitely for parents to refocus on the fact their child is awesome in their own way. Some definitely make me cringe but I understand why parents hold onto them especially when they are constantly told their child is a burden and deficient. She'll always be autistic and she'll always be my daughter and I will always love her for just who she is nothing more nothing less ❤ Also thanks so much for your videos it's really great to have autistic voices to help me navigate helping our daughter ❤ thank you so much for your content ❤

[@MikkoThaAnimalVegan]

I highly recommend Dr Oyalo herbal supplements for autism kids

[@Yepsuredid]

I felt the same way about fireworks shows. Every 4th of July, my family would go to see fireworks and I would just lie down on the floor of our truck and hold my ears and cry but I would still be forced to go the next time.

[@jimwilliams3816]

It’s been rainy here and that seems to have squelched the fireworks that we usually hear around us this weekend. yayyyyyyyy! I don’t mind pretty but why do people need them to be so loud?

[@irregularlyregularly]

The brown pea is just a dried pea like the dried beans you can buy at the grocers (they are the same but at different stages-still good but requiring different methods of preparing)

[@imautisticnowwhat]

Ahh! Well that might actually make sense then!

[@cowsonzambonis6]

TOTALLY agree what you said about group projects, the push to be social etc in school. We should value introverts more in our society!! About Dr Seuss, he did political cartoons during WWII. I’m definitely not saying what he drew was right, but the context might help. Sorry you’re not mesmerizing…😂

[@dianeb-r8512]

As someone who has just figured out that they’re actually autistic (currently trying to get a proper diagnosis), I have really appreciated what uou said about discovering that the best things about yourself (strong sens of justice, perfectionism, etc) are actually autistic traits : I recently had a lot of bad thoughts about it and you really warmed me up with your words. So thank you 💜

[@PurpleRhymesWithOrange]

No Dr Seuss books were "pulled". His family and the publishers agreed that 6 of how 40 children's books will no longer be printed because they depicted characters that now may be considered negative stereotypes. As for his cartoons, during WWII he worked for the US Army propaganda office. The US government hired him specifically to show German and Japanese characters in a negative light.

[@graysnake5332]

I'm on my autistic healing journey and this is my first video from you but not being able to choose what I thought was fun and them telling me I had to do something else that that was really hard and hearing it from another person saying it's hard too. Makes me feel better because it's not just me cuz I just wanted to stay in the room where it was quiet. Maybe take a small nap. Read a good book draw but no I had to go outside. You know what I did outside. I sat down and I read and I was not exactly happy was hot. It was loud and I couldn't enjoy my book because kids would come pick on me or force me to interact with them and now and my 20s. I'm exhausted and I am trying to find any reason to just live and finding connections. Another people is really helping me. Even if I don't have to actively connect I can still be introverted do what I want and listen to others and it helps. And I listen to myself but that book thing really just got me. And thank you for sharing your experience. It's really helpful to know I'm not alone

[@jamiehatesyou9175]

The way you sent your mom a screenshot of the definition of 'mesmerizing' when she asked what you meant made me laugh so much because I do the exact same thing😂

[@reiltinedwards4459]

I have a very similar story to that one about the autistic kid who was allowed to read during break time. Throughout most if not all of primary school I just chilled in the corner of the yard during break, just pacing or sitting and day dreaming. This was fun to me. This was how I played. I found playing games with other children stressful. There was an SNA (special needs assistant) who would constantly ask me to play with other children. Everyday when I came in after break she would ask me who I played with and would be really disappointed when I said "myself". She made me feel guilty about preferring to play alone. Trying to force me to play with others made socialising feel more like a job that I had to do rather than something I would do for fun or because I wanted to. Even back then I understood that forcing me to socialise would likely not result in meaningful friendships. Like my dad says, "love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit"

[@nonamelegend_vapor]

Been a minute since I've read something in a YT comment that legit cracked me up. I'm using that now (Re: "love is like a fart")

[@TentoesMe]

My poor parents just could not figure me out.😊 I found out in my 50s. Mom laughed, "Well that explains a lot!"

[@kristalcampbell3650]

As a late diagnosed 'smart kid' it was very much genius today autistic tomorrow 😅

[@jimwilliams3816]

26:00 you are correct, those colors are NOT right. I’m trying to remember how to explain the science here...they are kind of on the opposite sides of the visible spectrum that our eyes perceive. If you stare at an intensely green image for a while, your color cones will fatigue such that when you look away you are likely to see a red cast or ghost image. Staring at an intensely red image, it will fatigue your cones so you see green when you look away. That’s why intense green and red placed together on a page is uncomfortable to look at: there’s this push-pull of color fatigue going on in your eyes.

[@-ElysianEcho-]

My autism isn’t a super power, it’s not my personality, it’s not a failure of me, it’s not a broken part that needs fixing, it’s just part of me

[@reversed0muramasa]

the "its not a symptom, its a feature" one is like a meme within a meme. it comes form video game culture where a bug in a game sometimes turns out to be a good thing or thus a 'feature'. the original phrase was "its not a bug, its a feature"

[@dmgroberts5471]

It's also used ironically by software testers, especially for particularly funny bugs, for instance, a delete confirmation dialogue that deletes the item regardless of if you say "Yes" or "No."

[@Blubberblase7]

I would say high masking and low masking rather that funktioning. since we all do funktion and struggle in our own way, but how visible that is to the people around us is more a question of how well is it masked. but that is just my interpretation of that

[@Ignasimp]

I like high functioning better. High functioning works with many other mental health issues while masking seems far more specific to autism. As someone who likes to find patters I like it better when I can make sense of a lot of things at the same time than having to subcategorize things when there is absolutelly no need to.

[@nunpho]

Aww i loved the messages with your mum 😂. So many of these are pure cringe. That autism parenting magazine sounds... Interesting 😬

[@lisasteel6817]

My mother was super toxic negative told me every day that I’d never amount to anything, I was stupid, told me to stop crying etc. I’d go with toxic positivity any day.

[@dancinginmaltesers]

I’m so glad you ranted about the acronyms. They’re a nightmare and so forced! Damn it. They do it a lot in medical areas and occasionally they work like FAST but apart from that can people just give it a break and not force it so much. Also I loved the text messages between you and your mum 😅

[@AMPYMCSTAMPY]

my therapist was lovely, she was called danielle, and she supported me a lot with my autism diagnosis. this was about 11 years after i was diagnosed, but i never got any support after getting there. i was just told i am and shoved back into school more confused than when i started. but she diagnosed me with ptsd too, and she went, "Well, autism isnt so much a super power as what people say, but you could see your PTSD symptoms as gifts and kyrptonites. you have very good directional hearing when you are scared. thats spidey sense." and i burst out laughing. she was the best. it really just took the new, scary diagnosis and made it something to find kinda funny, and kinda cool. it made it less threatening to think about. we need more people like her.

[@jessicac6189]

I think they're trying to say autistic individuals tend to be super pure, so they must be angels. My friends always comment about how pure I am and how I'm angelic. I can see how it comes from good intent, but it brings a certain pressure with it. It feels like there's an expectation of perfection and you're not allowed to be human. I just want to thank you so much for your videos; they've helped me so much. I slipped through the cracks; at the beginning of the year I stumbled across some information that made me think that maybe, possibly I could be autistic, but because of society's common perception of autism, I thought I couldn't be. These past few weeks of deep diving with your videos (and some other KZbinrs) and other resources have made so much sense of my over 30 years of experience on this planet. I've always felt like I couldn't fit in or "get things right" no matter how hard I tried. Everything just seemed to come so naturally to others, like breathing, but I couldn't manage it. People would just tell me I wasn't trying hard enough, that I basically just needed to pull myself up by my bootstraps and do it. It was so frustrating because I could understand the importance and value of things but there was some kind of disconnect in my brain in execution. Looking back, it makes a lot more sense in the light of autism. Things like why I relate more to my aunt who got diagnosed late in life with autism and one of the boys I babysit who happens to be autistic. It's probably why when I worked at a preschool that those that happened to be autistic would gravitate to me naturally. And why I never could really connect well with most people, despite all that I was trying or how much I wanted to. I just always felt like an alien. Also, thanks to your videos that I've shared with my two best friends, they've realized that they are likely autistic, too.

[@lisasteel6817]

I consider my abilities a superpower. I like to focus on the positives because there have been so many negatives in my life. I’m 44 and I’ve got to the point that if I consider my autism a negative I think I’ll close the insanity loop fully. I’m very proud that I’ve been able to turn the dis in disability into an ability. I’m now a self taught artists and I couldn’t have done it without the hyper focus from my autism. At the same time I can also say im not okay, I was not okay growing up, I had the same alien human struggles. It’s okay to be awesome and to struggle at the same time. I think it’s important that if you feel you are special then that is wonderful, don’t let someone tell you how to feel about yourself and your own disability, it’s bad enough when NTs tell us how to fell about our disabilities and abilities, but having fellow autists do it is super toxic.

[@rarelycold6618]

Group projects in college while studying economics had an incalculable impact on my strong "sense of justice". Being the only one who would take them seriously, and almost having to take another semester because of one, greatly shifted my perspective on what is actually fair.

[@ooshiikurai]

I really think there should have been an indoor recess option. Not just for kids who were in trouble but for those who valued quiet time inside. I also was shoved outside in school despite begging to stay indoors. I really loved to read but also to play Oregon Trail on our old clunky Mac classroom computer. Being a teacher myself now I don’t think it really would have been that hard an accommodation. They already had teachers on post outside and some inside for detention. Why not just allow some kids the choice to go outside or stay in. Course there may be really hot days where kids wanna stay inside anyway… I never really understood why it was important for us to go outside when the tar on the blacktop was melting. Like surely that should have been a sign to stay indoors.

[@Petertwohig1948]

Thanks for this. As usual, you are 10/10. As for loneliness, I have never experienced it. Maybe I'm fucked in the head as well as being autistic. But no, the fact is, I'm a writer, so the creatures that inhabit my imagination are quite enough, thank you very much. Also, I'm lovely, so when I do meet others they tend to like me (until I start talking about a special interest, of course.) Sigh.

[@jimwilliams3816]

Loved the astronaut in free fall!! THAT I can relate to! My experience has been that any inspirational quote that includes the word “angel,” especially when combined with “children,” will trigger warm fuzzies in a certain group of people, no matter how nonsensical the rest is. Then again, I am fearful avoidant and always have been, and one of the earliest dreams I remember resembled an out of body view of a death bed scene...so maybe I did almost go to Heaven when I was little, looked at the place and went “looks scary, no thanks!” 😂 Apologies if that came across too dark, but me being me, I posted it because it made me laugh.

[@michaelavanmosseveld1281]

Im so sick of my own boyfriend denying im AUDHD, it makes me question my own self, they think cause we arent like IAMSAM that we arent autistic, it seems people only accept level 3 as proper autistic and anything under it is just attention seeking 😓 i havent had an official diagnosis but have had 6 different drs state that i am for sure exactly right about my brain and definitely have AuDHD, just gotta get the official diagnosis and then i can just shove that in my bfs face like "SEEEEEE NOW VALIDATE ME IVE BEEN MISSING OUT THIS WHOLE TIME" I shouldnt be with someone so ableist but i have no self worth and codependency problems. WAAHHH 😭😩 lol

[@JasmineSmith-vt2jc]

I am constantly doubting my self-diagnosis and it’s really hard when somebody you trust tells you that you aren’t. My brother did it to me the other day and it was incredibly shattering for me. I don’t have any advice, just that I understand how hard it is.

[@FronteirWolf]

I have high functioning autism. I'm not high-masking though, I just isolated myself, I never tried to change myself to fit in. I just did me. The 2 aren't always synonymous.

[@sewerrateternal306]

In school my best friend had a huuuge one direction phase and I couldn't for the life of me find an ounce of interest in these al dente british noodle boys. So she made me study cards and like detective boards with all the info and events so I could follow along what she was saying. I ate that shit UP because it became a challenge to study up on this topic aaaaand turns out 10 years later I'm pursuing an autism and ADHD diagnosis. Is anyone surprised?

[@makoodlecaboodle8136]

Hearing about superheros and autism reminds me of a pbs kids show, hero elementary. One of the main characters is autistic and its shown to be a benefit and a hinderance in a realistic way. Its one of the most faithful/respectful depictions of autism ive ever seen

[@saraviboo8139]

There is another option with group projects. I was always the volunteer to work alone kid. When that wasn't an option there was usually an explosive meltdown because no one would listen and I felt all my peers were stupid. It didn't take most of my teachers long to let me be on my own. It took me twenty-five years to find a diagnosis as to why I am this way.

[@claratalbot7613]

The group projects part hits so close to home for me. I'm introverted and while I do remember times when I was in a group project and it was fine but more often than not either my ideas were completely ignored or I would end up just going off on my own to work anyways. I can even remember a few times when the group would try to force me to either just go along with the groups ideas or just wanted me to do all the work so they could sit their talking. Group projects can be fine but they shouldn't be a mandatory thing that people are pushed into but rather give people a choice on either working solo or with a group

[@NekoChanSenpai]

Fun fact: when you start with the acronym and shoehorn words in, that is a backronym, which is a portmanteau of backwards acronym

[@imautisticnowwhat]

Love it!! Thank you!

[@user-saraswatidevi]

8:54 Oh god i remember my old school having this in their special "autism room" they where so mean to autistic kids yet claimed they treated them well there the teachers always acted like i was stupid

[@rbandhoneyberry]

The character in Rain Man was based on 3 people rather than one, 2 of which were autistic, but the point remains the same. Also, I have a genius-level IQ and so what? I didn't do anything to earn it and I'm still autistic AF. Capitalism still considers me a "throw-away."

[@rbandhoneyberry]

Oh, another thing about Rain Man: the ASD "experts" who consulted on the show both insisted that the brother had to go back to the institution (in the original script, he moved in with his older brother) because it wasn't "realistic" for an autistic person to live outside of one. This is despite the fact that one of them, Rimland, was the father of one of the other people who went into the composite character and he never institutionalized his son. The other young man was also never institutionalized. But they insisted that none of us could live outside of an institution.

[@nunpho]

That's so interesting! I've never actually seen rain man, just glimpses and I hear people talking about it. I wonder if there's a good deep dive video

[@rbandhoneyberry]

@@nunpho I don't know about a video, but Steve Silberman did an entire chapter on the movie in his book Neurotribes. I highly recommend it. Most libraries have it.

[@Catlily5]

I like the Rainman movie. I saw it in 1990. I knew a mother who had an autistic son. She said that her son was very similar to the main character (minus the card counting abilities). It is unfortunate that everyone assumed that all autistic people are like Rainman but I don't think that it is the movies fault. People are silly to think movies are realistic. I got diagnosed with autism this year at age 47. I am nothing like Rainman. But all autistic people are different. I don't think Rainman was so bad. It is just one fictional, jazzed up version of autism.

[@dmgroberts5471]

Ah yes, I know this feeling, I call it, "if I'm so fucking smart, why don't I have stable employment?"

[@noahnaugler7611]

I always thought of "symptom" as less of implying negativity than just being led by an implied "irregular"

[@kaistinakemperdahl9667]

About the being perfect thing: as a religious person, I agree with you that we’re not perfect. A friend of mine was asked by her son whether he was perfect just the way he is (as he's heard in a song). Her reply was no. And she explained that he doesn’t need to be perfect for her to love him. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about loving each other (and oneself) as imperfect beings. I thought that was beautiful and very wise.

[@sarahthomson878]

That part where you texted your mom asking if you're mesmerising was the best, I laughed so much. 😂

[@ChrispyChken]

The things you said from 2:50-5:17 are exactly the words I needed to hear right now. I was undiagnosed and have self-diagnosed in my 20s, and I'm going to get my official diagnosis next week. It has been a really big struggle to me seeing things as "symptoms of my autism", and it definitely has taken away my enjoyment of a lot of things in my life. Its like I cant allow myself to enjoy something if I enjoy it because of my autism, which is so backwards. I should embrace the things I enjoy because of my autism because I enjoy them! I've been really depressed the more I learn about my autism, but its such a perspective shift to think about things in a more positive light. It is really hard to shift my thoughts that quickly, but I'm going to make it my personal goal to try and figure out the things that I do and enjoy because of my autism and appreciate them more.

[@-belue-6697]

20:10…”AUTISM ROCKS AND ROLLS”… Why did that remind me of my mom telling me how I crawled as a baby for about 3 weeks and then got up and walked away fully knowing how to walk…And before then my ONLY mode of transportation was literally me ROLLING everywhere I went!… Like literally rolling down the hallway to go visit my dad and stuff! 🤷‍♀️ 😂 🤷‍♂️… To this day that still blows my mind that I ever even thought to do that and why and how I was still a late discovered Autistic individual! 🤔🤯🤔

[@LunarWind99]

Omg same here, apparently I didn't ever walk and then suddenly just started walking all the time lol Same with speaking, I just suddenly started speaking in full sentences 😂

[@Catlily5]

Both those things are more common with autistic people.

[@teathesilkwing7616]

I’m imagining a baby just somersaulting across the floor like they’re dodge rolling in a video game lmao

[@claudiamcghin3419]

Languages have always been a special interest of mine. I'm only fluent in English but I know a lot of phrases in multiple languages, probably due to echolalia.

[@ninjabgwriter]

That's cool! I recently developed a special interest in Norwegian due to a character I'm writing for (Virgil, from Portal Stories: Mel), and I've been using Duolingo for learning! There's a lot of people debating about the app and how it works and stuff, and it's not perfect, but it IS free, and that is the only thing I can afford right now. I really like the way it feels in my mouth for speaking exercises, especially because it has some sounds English doesn't, like the way they pronounce 'r's, which is like a tap or a slight 'd' sound, like rolling if you only did one. Also I like trying to remember where the special characters go, and how some things are very similar to their English counterparts like katt=cat or egg=egg, some are sort of alike like brød=bread, some look really similar but are pronounced super differently like mikrobølgeovn=microwave oven, and some are just totally off the walls like kjøleskap=refrigerator or kanskje=maybe.

[@megangunter601]

My favorite thing including socializing is to be around people who are doing their own thing or socializing with each other while I get to do my special interest (which tends to be reading). An example from my childhood is when my family would be hanging out in the living room, I would find a comfortable place with them and read. I liked being with them, but I didn't necessarily want to interact.

[@EggsToYourBacon]

Random, but ive been drawing for a couple hours while listening to your videos and you talking about hyperfocus causing us to neglect our bodies actually made me tear myself away from what i was doing to make sure i didnt need anything and i gotta say thanks for that even if it wasnt intentional

[@wenderajade]

Several of these definitely felt like parental coping for having an autistic child and I don't really know how to feel about it

[@renatajansen3872]

You asked me out of context! You didn't explain! LOL!! If you had said am I mesmerising when I'm stimming I would say yes! I loved watching you tell yourself stories and bounce and flap your hands!Those videos still make me feel so happy! I never saw it as anything but very special!! Yes that was and still is mesmerising!

[@flower4750]

aww this comment is so lovely and sweet!

[@disdrac]

1:22 So that explains why my middle name is one from a fallen angel/satan, here I thought my dad was just a edgy autistic with a special interest in mythology