The Reality of Dealing with Heartbreak & Depression

[@EricCanterra]

Stay strong Bradley. Take one day at a time, even one hour at a time if necessary. You're a sensitive man who loves deeply and that's why you're in so much pain. You will find love again when the time is right. Know that you're a good man and a catch....and be as positive as you can be as you work thru the heartbreak. Blessings and positive thoughts going your way from America.

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you so much for the thoughtful words and support, means the world the right now, seriously. Taking the time to comment, from across the world, it's wonderful man, thank you. And yeah, pushing forward, slowly but surely, filling the minutes with anything but dwelling or getting worse. I will not let that happen. Sharing my journey and the thought of showing people we can get through dark times is at the forefront of my mind, I'm not over the moon about where I am but if I can keep focused on these positive thoughts and thinking of the future then I can push on. Thank you again friend, wishing you hope, energy and joy from across the pond in England, take care of yourself.

[@mfc2158]

Such a genuine bloke keep fighting my guy your KZbin fans will always your back g

[@BRadTelevision]

Thanks for the support man, and for being a fan. Yeah it's a real battle, but fighting it. Thanks again, be good.

[@lonelyguy7619]

“That is how you got through this week”. Man.. I started bawling after you said that.. and I’m still crying as I type this. I’m also going through a breakup dude. It’s been a week since I cried, choosing to just work my ass off and not think of anything else, been working 12-16 hours a day these past few days. I’m fucking exhausted. The long weekend has just started here in Kuala Lumpur (Monday and Wednesday next are holidays so I’m taking Tuesday off as well). Started doing weekend errands here at home: laundry,cooking brunch (it’s 1030am now) and opened KZbin on the telly, your video was the first one that popped up so I turned off the stove, sat on the couch and started watching. Man.. I’m still crying, it’s like aftershocks, like what the fuck.. thank you man for this vid.. I’ve only opened up to handful of friends about my breakup being that I’m gay and it’s a taboo subject here in Malaysia and I’m over 40 as well (friends my age appear to be homophobic).. anyways, thanks again dude. Been bottling up all my emotions for a few days now, really felt good crying them out. Breakups are really difficult, here’s hoping to the both of us we recover gracefully. Thanks a whole lot man. Thank you. Thank you!!!

[@BRadTelevision]

I've only just seen this, the notifications on my youtube are all messed up. So sorry to hear about your pain friend, sending you all the love and energy in the world, hope you are doing better now. Sorry for not seeing this, be good buddy.

[@jacobfogel4129]

I really love this channel and you for always being so raw and transparent. You always have amazing advice B-Rad. I'm currently going through something mentally, not as bad as you describe, but this video has really helped motivate me. Thank you.

[@BRadTelevision]

Sorry to hear about your tough times, but happy to inspire and encourage. Trying to share my experiences and hope someone can learn and benefit from them. Thanks for watching and taking the time to comment, look after yourself friend.

[@CelticIsaacs]

I wanted to add a quote I heard once..."In order to heal it, you have to feel it" I know you're not ignoring how you feel. I've had close friends experience massive trauma before, some have gone down scary paths. However...those who acknowledge the hurt can then start to figure out a way to bounce back and become whole again. It won't ever feel the same...but you'll be able to create a "new normal" Again...I'm here for ya friend!

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you so much man, really. Thoughtful comment, wise words. Grow and move forward, that's what's got to happen. I really appreciate you taking the time to comment, it's inspiring, feel like you do all have my back, it's great, so thankful. I got in a good headspace yesterday, tough today, but I know I can get there, I will. Take care friend, really.

[@CelticIsaacs]

You're strong! We are here for you my brother!!

[@BRadTelevision]

Thanks friend, really. Pushing through these tough times, rough day today, but still here and not giving up. Thank you again, I'l get there. Take care buddy.

[@christopherobizoba535]

I've been in so much pain, just fresh out of a relationship and it's been hell since..feels better to know that I'm not alone. I don't know how long it'll take before I'm okay again. I'm really hurt😩

[@BRadTelevision]

There's nothing else like it, but you're still here, still going, you've found this and you are right, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. You've got this, slow steps forward, life and energy shall return slowly and steadily with each one. Take care of yourself my friend.

[@marktondi6361]

Thank you for this video. It has really helped me.

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you man, and thanks for taking the time to comment, take care of yourself.

[@mikef8846]

Thanks for sharing, Bradley. I too have been having a hard time for the past few years. Years of dealing with the B.S. of being gay have certainly taken their toll on me. I didn't know about the Samaritans, or know anybody that calls them, but I may may give them a call one day! Just try to stay busy, my friend! Do some group activities so you can meet a nice girl.

[@BRadTelevision]

If you need to talk, share your thoughts, get something off your chest, CALL THEM. You might feel weird and strange at first, a total stranger on the other end of the phone, but once you relax with it, it's life changing. They've been a lifeline for me, seriously life-saving. Call them. And yeah I'm just trying to stay busy, fill the minutes, forgetting the pressure of my writing career right now. It's about not dwelling, so gym, cinema, cooking food, walking, working, speaking to people, ANYTHING but staying in and getting worse. Sorry to hear of your tough times, I'll say your comments and support over the years have helped and inspired me, so I have to say I'm thankful for that, really. We're not alone, we don't give up, we're still here. Take care friend, be good.

[@mikef8846]

@@BRadTelevision And thank you for inspiring me too. Be good!

[@DannyBrownDesign]

This video has really helped - thank you

[@BRadTelevision]

Being me, trying, pushing forward, awesome to hear that's helped, look after yourself, move forward, slowly but surely we'll get there. Take care buddy.

[@Azhark94]

Just went through a break up after a 1 and a half year relationship. We just ended up not talking at all. It's crazy how a switch just quickly flicks . Feel like I've had no closure. Great vid though. Thanks bud. Stay safe.

[@BRadTelevision]

Sorry to hear about your rough times. I had no talking, no closure, just gone, absolutely the worst. There is hope. Get up, wash, eat. However bad you're feeling, things change. You're still here, don't give up. Thanks for watching and commenting, look after yourself buddy.

[@Mearadge]

Thank you for your honesty, cool. Life is hard and I want to inspire you to keep up your everyday life. Calling the Samaritans is an inspiration to me for my own agenda (is that what you call it, idk, I'm not caught up with slang.) But I am inspired by your honesty. And I want the best for my life too. :)

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you for the kind words and support, and that everyday life really is what I have to keep going at, so tough, but pushing for it, all the support here is really helping, so from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU. And the samaritans, I first called them years ago and was shy and scared, didn't know what I was doing, but now they're a lifeline, truly. I am indebted to them all and wish I was in a position to repay them, or find everyone I spoke to and just give them a hug. Life really is unbelievable, the worst things can catch us off guard, I really didn't need what's happened to me right now, other times I may have been stronger, but of course you don't get a say in things going wrong so it's really punched me in the soul, hard. But I'm here, fighting. We're not alone, we're still here, don't give up. Thank you again, I promise to keep uploaded, I promise this will be a recovery story not a tragedy. Take care, be good.

[@superfab6438]

Take it easy mate - you have to take things one day at a time at this point and accept sometimes you'll have good days and sometimes you'll have bad days. Some tough love for you though.....no more shooting videos from your bed man!! It ain't good!

[@BRadTelevision]

Wise words man, and thanks for the support. Tough day today, but still here, not giving up. And the bed just seems to work when I'm in a hotel room, place for tripod, open lit space. Got a vlog I'm editing and I'm walking around outside in it, promise haha. Thanks again man.

[@superfab6438]

@@BRadTelevision aaah...ok, will let you off young padawan! :-) I thought it was your bedroom. And by the way, you have no choice but to not give up. :-) You'll get there mate.

[@gulaginmate1984]

You'll pass this test of character Brad :) Thinking of you buddy.

[@BRadTelevision]

Thanks man, really, and for commenting and being a fan. Very grateful in this tough time for the support, I'll get there. Take care of yourself.

[@destroyerofmorons]

How long did it take you to get over this?

[@BRadTelevision]

"Get over" is a big horrid phrase I don't really like using, seems finite and absolute that labels life as this was time 'X' and this was time 'Y', I'd rather say something along the lines of: in life we get damaged or hurt, but then we grow, recover, learn, and develop into a new self. To look back over 5 years now and say exactly how and when and why things changed as they did would be hard. It was slow, it took time, some days were harder than others, but over time there are some glimmers of hope, and the harder days get fewer and fewer. I tried to occupy my time and stay busy, stop myself sitting alone and spiralling down with negative thoughts, which can be hard, to get out and do anything when all you want to do is stop thinking and feeling, but it is essential. Slowly but surely I developed new routines, I found new places, people and activities that enriched my life in new ways. I'm sure KZbin says the month & year when a video was uploaded, so you could look through my content and see me change and develop before your eyes, it's one of the reasons I wanted to document my recovery, so people could see a real world example of it. Hope this helps in some way, take care.

[@vickynailon5655]

Im 34 and one year of broken-hearted still in pain

[@BRadTelevision]

So sorry to hear about your tough times, really. There's no time limit, and everyone reacts differently, so there's nothing wrong with still feeling things after a year, don't put pressure on yourself and certainly don't judge yourself. A year, and you've got through it, I don't know the level of what you've experienced, but watching this video and taking the time to comment, clearly it's very real and serious for you, and a YEAR of that YOU'VE GOT THROUGH. I hear that and think of HOW STRONG YOU ARE, that is a positive in this darkness, all the pain and shit and heartbreak and whatever else, YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN UP. You've come so SO far. Warrior. I can't tell you what the future holds, but you're strong enough to face it and feel LIFE and JOY again. You're still here, don't give up. You've got this.

[@maybugz]

Everything you said described how I've been the last couple weeks, gym and everything, I understand it all. I'm gonna go check out the rest of your channel :) 38 m uk

[@BRadTelevision]

Sorry to hear you're in a tough place man, I'm no psychologist, just a guy and I really wanted to keep the camera rolling and uploading the experience, as rubbish as I felt. Hope something here helps in some way, any way. You're still here, don't give up. You've got this buddy.

[@Chris-lk9iv]

In this EXACT space now. Except not only did I have to move out the flat but leave the country and go back home

[@BRadTelevision]

Blimey, sorry to hear, and such a huge change as well, nothing prepares us for these shocks in life, can be huge and seem to totally pull the world out from under our feet. But please don't give up, don't lose hope. Do something, anything, go for a walk, talk, talk, talk and share, do not bottle things up and try not to stagnate and rot away. Easier said than done, I know, ha. So glad I managed to upload as I went through this, hopefully there's something in my output for you. Look after yourself, you're still here, don't give up.

[@prashanthb6521]

All the best.

[@BRadTelevision]

You as well, thank you

[@overlandoffroadadventures8980]

Thank you

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you for watching and taking the time to comment, truly appreciated. Take care of yourself.

[@iftomatosareafruitwhyisntk4038]

Your doing great buddy keep going

[@BRadTelevision]

Thanks for commenting again, yeahhhh, moving forward, slowly but surely. This is a recovery story, not a miserable one, I will find myself again. Be good buddy.

[@marklees608]

Big man hug for you mate! 👉🏻💪🏼🤜🏼❤️🤛🏼

[@BRadTelevision]

Thanks man, I'll get there, just rough right now. Cheers, be good

[@SuperYtc1]

You’ve been describing my feelings for the past 10 years, but particularly the past 3. After I graduated from university (with a good maths degree) I couldn’t get a job and now it’s been 3 years and I still haven’t got a job. I tutor students in maths but it’s not enough to give me independence and leave my parents’ house. My feelings are like the pendulum swing you describe. Going from a feeling of not caring about anything, to severe and deep anguish, hopelessness and just wanting to cry curled up in bed all day. I’d love to die but I’m just not brave enough to do it right now. This is a cruel world filled with cruel people. I know you think this is negative but it’s reality. Good luck B-Rad.

[@BRadTelevision]

You've always been a fan and taken the time to comment, so I'm truly sorry to only now hear about the struggles you're facing within yourself. Sounds like you've worked hard, got a good maths degree (that's hardcore, that's awesome) and now you tutor students, all while living at home but while thinking about your future and goals you might like to work towards. All of that is very positive, even if you may not be able to see or feel it right now. In this video I almost went on to talk about my suicidal thoughts in the past, but didn't, going to plan a video and talk seriously about my time there and getting out of it soon. I went to doctors, or rather, my friend's girlfriend shoulder carried me to the doctor because I wasn't doing anything, not paying rent, not looking for jobs, just drinking myself to death (this was before I started B-Rad TV). Perhaps seeing a doctor would help you start a journey of mental recovery and finding yourself which could set everything you talk about and finding peace with yourself all in motion. What I learned is that I didn't want to die, I just wanted the unbearble pain to stop. I wanted to get out of that situation, and in the despair and hopelessness you're not thinking straight and can't see a way out, but believe me, death is not the answer. If I had done it when I planned, and I had the means to do it, B-Rad TV would never had existed. I wouldn't have written a single word, shot a single video or travelled anywhere EVER, nothing. And that is, well, there are no words, tragedy wouldn't even cover it. All the little comments saying I've helped and inspired, I wouldn't have helped anyone, horrible thought. And I can remember seeing your picture and name on here when you first commented, and I laughed, I was entertained, you brought me joy. First I thought it was a childish joke, haha 'Ur anus', and then I also thought of bloody Jupiter the collossal planet with glasses on hunched over a little keyboard with little t-rex arms watching my videos and typing away, haha. Silly thoughts but you've entertained me, and your regular comments, along with everyone else's all motivate and inspire me, so I will say thank you again, so much, for that. YOU'RE STILL HERE, DON'T GIVE UP. Stay in touch on here, or message, or instagram, whatever, if I can respond I will. You take care of yourself friend, and I'll take care of myself. We're not alone and can feel at peace with ourselves, and move forward in the best possible way to feel joy with life once more. YOU'RE STILL HERE, DON'T GIVE UP. Be good.

[@SuperYtc1]

@@BRadTelevision Thank you B-Rad for that nice comment. I really love space so the Uranus name is partly a joke (because sometimes one shouldn't take life too seriously) and partly because I genuinely just love space, and how our planets are named after Greek gods. People used to think these things in the sky were gods, and now we know differently. It's part of our story here on Earth as humans. I'll keep in touch and probably comment in the future, if I feel like adding a comment of course. I watch a lot of your videos and sometimes don't comment but just watch. I hope you make it through your difficult time because you have brought a lot of joy to people and inspired people. You changed my mindset a couple of years ago and sometimes I drift away from that mindset but when you upload I remember to try get back on track, and I also remember the month of no added sugar, no bad food, only drinking water I had. Take care!

[@BRadTelevision]

@@SuperYtc1 Sorry it's taken so long to see this, I don't get notifications about replies to my replies for some reason. Space IS incredible, we're on a rock, floating through space, maaaddddddd. I'm really pushing through right now, ready to share as well. Thanks for being there and letting me know I've helped, really. Take care friend.

[@kevsterman]

Big hug to you Brad. And don't forget, its Eurovision on Saturday. If that's not something to look forward to I don't know what is ;-)

[@BRadTelevision]

Haha, thanks for the support man, and that should be good for a laugh, good old eurovision! Thanks for commenting, take care buddy

[@mechanicalnut7866]

What do you do for work

[@blackphoenix8932]

Chin up Brad.

[@BRadTelevision]

Thanks man, editing a video now that I think shows progress, then got one after that that seems worse, haha, really is a roller coaster. Watch this space, should be up here tonight. Thanks for the support friend, take care.

[@Jimmy8rAr1c0]

Hey Brad. I am hearing how tough times have been recently for you. I have experience in a similar situation. I would love to hear from you and help support you through these trying times. I am in the mental health care field and I may be able to help you unpack this. If you are open to and would like to please feel free to contact me somehow if you can personally message me. Your fan base including myself genuinely care and are concerned for you. Please do not hesitate to contact me if you are able or respond if you want to get in contact.

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you for the support and the offer, I'll send you a message. Thanks for being a fan and taking the time to comment, really wonderful in these trying times. I'm so grateful, and having the youtube to focus myself on, and think about recovery with that, that's a massive positive. Yeah, I'll send you a message. Thank you and take care.

[@BRadTelevision]

I can't see a way to message you on here, I have instagram which is easy to message on if you're on there.

[@Jimmy8rAr1c0]

B-Rad TV I am afraid I don’t have instagram. No problems, I have made a throw away email address. If you’d like to email me I’ll send you some ways of contacting me personally. Email me at [e-mail]

[@thelulzish]

I don't think that you know, but you're kind of a Samaritan for plenty of people here on YT. Not because youre the listener, but because youre the speaker and us, the B-Rad community are the listener. There are times in life where listening someone reflecting ones situation, can do wonders for the listeners (and ofc, like in your case, vice versa). I, for example, just like you, see myself as the ordinary bloke, dealing with all kind of life problems, nothing special. But sometimes, you touch someones life in a very odd, niche way, just by venting, rambling, talking about things (like you do here on YT). And there it is, the life touching situation. I bet my left testicle, you touch many lifes with your videos. Oh wait, I've won the bet already, bc you touched my life a few years ago and provoked a massive weightloss with your book. So yes, keep getting through your days. Just keep on, keeping on. Inevitably, you'll break the numbness. Take care!

[@BRadTelevision]

Unbelievable to hear, always, and you've been here commenting and supporting me for a long time now, thank you for that, and this now, really appreciated. Taking the time to comment, kind words, sharing and support. I've got not special kit, no microphones or lights, just the same old handycam thats got a crack underneath and scratches on it haha, but hell, it's still going and so am I! And just a guy, trying, wanting to do good, help and support anyone in pain, or alone, or anything with sharing my journey. And reading comments like this, it's amazing. I'll get through, I will. Thanks again, be good buddy, and watch this space!

[@Mearadge]

Oh fyi, you are the first I've ever commented to. I watch You Tube a lot.

[@BRadTelevision]

Thank you watching and taking the time to comment, really appreciated, especially in these trying times. Glad you like my output, just want to do good and be good, and at the moment find my old self again. Thank you again, take care.