The Simpsons - US Army

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The Simpsons - Season 18 Episode 05 - G.I.D`oh
US Army trying to get new recruits :)

[@Theguywhoasked1177]

"its not a war crime if we win."

[@shahramtondkarmobarakie1824]

fascists' last words as the soviets marched into germany

[@user-th7nm3ug7k]

@@shahramtondkarmobarakie1824soviets last words before the Berlin Wall fell

[@deryaergul8261]

@@shahramtondkarmobarakie1824 This is a statement that is valid for both parties. Only one side can win.

[@ChimpanzeeUltra]

winners rule the truth

[@betha3603]

That’s true though! He who controls the present, controls the past 😮

[@GalinDray]

If you've ever met an army recruiter you know how damn accurate this is.

[@CollinMcLean]

I've met army, marine corp, and navy recruiters... it's pretty accurate...

[@RedHairdo]

"I'm just a guy with a blank paper trying to figure out what's going on" - NYT fed to PV

[@davetheimpaler204]

I almost joined the Marines after highschool, got a high ASVAB score and all that, I didn't really want to be in the military (the Iraq War was still going, for one thing, and I was against all that) but heard the opportunities and training could be good, so I considered maybe joining the reserve and went with a friend to talk to my local recruiter. The thing is, the recruiter was an honest, decent guy and when we were going over the benefits and I was questioning him about the details, he stopped and said something like, "Real talk. You know this isn't a welfare office. The benefits and experience are good but this isn't the only place you can get that. I don't want you to sign up unless you actually want to serve your country. I'm not sure if you do. Are you here because you want to serve your country?". I said something like, "I'm really not sure about that" and stood up, shook his hand, thanked him and walked out.

[@joshua.merrill]

Asked the AF recruiter if we get to throw grenades in basic. He confidently said, “Oh, yeah! You’ll get to do a lot of things in basic!” Fast forward to 2 months of holding a blue dummy gun and getting to shoot 50 rounds at a 25yrd range one day.

[@danyalreza8050]

When I was thinking to join the (Dutch) military: Military: “Boy you’ll learn skills for life here! And I guarantee that you can make the most out of yourself with us! And I think you’re made for the special ops forces!” Me: “cool! So ummm… is it a problem if I have Asperger autism?” Military: “never mind you’re useless. Bye.” Me 8 years later: “That one time Autism saved my life.”

[@pocketsand76]

I like how skinner suffers frequent war flashbacks from his PTSD but still wants the kids to be enlisted.

[@reijiminato8762]

He should’ve been twice as wise by telling them to join either the Coast Guard, Air Force, or Space Force, instead

[@someguy9293]

@reijiminato8762 The episode was from 2006. Space Force wouldn't around until 2019. But you still got a point.

[@LeCommieBoi]

i'd enlist in the space force if I WASN'T LIVING IN CANADA@@someguy9293

[@Motownsports89]

​@@reijiminato8762Why? What's wrong with the Army?

[@SanctusPaulus1962]

​@@Motownsports89 You mean apart from being used as cannon fodder for the wealthy elites?

[@danielboatright8887]

Skinner telling the recruiter 'bite me' over a reenlistment applacation is the most realistic moment on the show.

[@Kermit_wielding_an_AK]

Fr💀

[@critter30002001]

The most realistic thing he ever did

[@FreshHeat]

"What, about being gay?" "Close... The army"

[@deafmusician2]

"about being gay? "Well, it IS the Navy!"

[@Journey_Awaits]

Women love men that shower with other men and look moody on motorbikes

[@unil1015]

@John Travolta oof

[@nicolasurcerarebolledo3841]

@John Travolta who hurt you

[@BigT.Larrity]

@John Travolta Another word for that is "ambition"

[@lolmaniac20]

"We will save you a spot in America's next unsolvable conflict" ... best line !

[@anthonyrymer4391]

Yeah that line was hilarious!

[@Arklay_98]

Yeah I'm sold where do I enlist

[@lolman15953]

Fuck it! Fuck you! I'm in!

[@Arkiasis]

When did this episode air? I assume around the time of the Iraq War. Now our unresolvable conflict is Syria.

[@decoytarget6185]

lolmaniac20 Our conflicts are unresolvable because we send in the army, hamstring them with rules of engagement that hold them back (can't have them offending the folks trying to kill us, after all), which causes things devolve into a stalemate. If we just let the army loose without all the politicians' bullshit, the bad guys would all be dead with a few months.

[@johnthomson2377]

I love how “Arise, people of Russia” plays in an American military advertisement

[@poke548]

Followed immediately by _The Battle on Ice._

[@johnthomson2377]

@@poke548 That comes a bit later in the movie.

[@AudieHolland]

Makes sense, since Americans also love Tchaikovsky's War of 1812 as if they own it

[@NigerianCrusader]

What is arise people of Russia Is that the eso commercial for Russians?

[@NazriB]

Lies again? UCL APPS Ugly America

[@trikstari7687]

Skinner getting the kids to sign up but refusing to reenlist is just perfect.

[@Motownsports89]

He did his time

[@Inferno65]

After what he went through, I don't blame him for not wanting to go back.

[@theevilascotcompany9255]

@@Inferno65 I thought he might go back to get more of that prawn gruel he liked.

[@-TJ-]

"Not wars, global struggles!" has the same tone as "It's not war, it's a military operation!"

[@darkchocolate3390]

Harry Truman called the Korean War "Police Action"

[@Lady_of_Winds]

My exact thought 😭

[@iwillnoteatzebugs]

Daddy US taught PUTIN very well. He is just applying what the US did since 1945

[@celeridad6972]

@@iwillnoteatzebugs only difference is that instead of being thousands of miles away from you this war is in you borders and with a somewhat valid reason. Gotta congratulate the US tho, it manage to throw the world into another east/west coldwar

[@ballsdeep9400]

@@iwillnoteatzebugs Nobody has declared war since WW2 every country does “military operations”

[@kristoferprovencal3608]

The accuracy with Skinner at the end is amazing, it perfectly captures how everyone who gets out feels lol

[@jimschlat]

ha yea exactly

[@TheUsername217]

DD214 gang

[@georgerafa5041]

I got out and then went back in. 6 years later as an officer. NOW it's a good time.

[@RoopeRontu1999]

Agreed. I mean, my time in the army was something, but honestly I wouldn't go back. Due to Covid we were so restricted that we couldn't go anywhere for the evening or spend time with other people. It was like being in jail, tbh, because you literally couldn't do anything independantly.

[@mkultra2456]

@@georgerafa5041 Oh yeah it's a whole different world when you're an officer. No more being called a gigantic panzy by a sergeant who's smaller than you..

[@dirtysniper3434]

There are two kinds of vets. Those who hated the army every day while being active duty but as soon as they get out they miss it with every bone in their body. Then their is a vet who loved and charished every moment good and bad in the army with many scars but important and unforgettable memories of happiness and embracing the suck.... and never want to re-enlist ever again...

[@gleb_trsv]

1:31 Music from the Film "Alexander Nevsky" "Get up, Russian people, For a glorious fight, for a mortal fight. Get up, free people, For our honest land!" - the words of this song!

[@SirCap15]

I see you are man of culture

[@vasilyvasilevsky3879]

Ironic! btw, thank you very much, I was looking for the name of this song, because it seemed very familiar to me

[@krvdaniil]

Made by Dmitry Shostakovich, famous Russian composer

[@gleb_trsv]

@@krvdaniil все же Прокофьев!

[@user-po7zc8yd1l]

Мне кажется это такой тонкий подъё-б над Американской армией 😂😂😂.

[@drumset09]

The best part is definitely "I'd do anything for my beloved army" "How about re-enlisting?" "How about you bite me?" lol, that's every vet ever.

[@t4m4l-d3-dvlc3]

i didn't get the final sentence

[@jonathancormack]

@@t4m4l-d3-dvlc3 it is an idiom equivalent to "fuck off"

[@shiroganekei1620]

@@t4m4l-d3-dvlc3 he's saying that this attitude is in line with the common mindset of veterans. A sense of brotherhood with their active duty counterparts, but a firm refusal to return to active duty.

[@kotroad]

Best part is song from 1:30, it's song from old(1938) soviet film "Alexandr Nevsky", music: Sergey Prokofiev, lyrics: Vladimir Lugovskoy. "Get up, you Russian people, In glorious fight, to fight to the death. Stand up, free men, For our earth fair! Living soldiers the respect and honor, And the dead - the glory is eternal. For the paternal house, for Russian edge Get up, you Russian people!" lol.

[@PostMalone-real]

Stockholm syndrome

[@earl7761]

What else do we get from pre-enlisting in the army, a free weapon skin, a bipod for my knife?

[@SirTalksALot01]

SWAGTASTIC 6 YEAROLD Supply drops

[@pieniadz9156]

A new TDM gamemode with large ammounts of people in one lobby, and killstreaks. Just imagine getting that 24 killstreak from CoD MW3!

[@boone4531]

SWAGTASTIC 6 YEAROLD lol battlefield friends reference

[@OlafoWaffle]

An AKO account, mandatory training, and enrolled in SSD1

[@Geckogold]

A box of grid squares and chemlight batteries.

[@Jarhead25]

"What, being gay?" "Close.. The Army" That one had me rolling 😂

[@Realbobo]

“Even the dumbest teenagers from the dumbest city in the dumbest state know better than to join the army” Hit me hard.

[@JackOfferman]

"I'd do anything for my beloved Army." "How about reenlisting?" "How about you bite me." Most realistic dialog in the Simpsons ever.

[@Dark_Slayer3000]

Veterans can relate

[@Boxanadu]

You don't reenlist, you get reactivated.

[@LetMeBelieve]

Pee pee poo poo 🙏

[@dean_l33]

@@Boxanadu Speaking of reactivated...

[@Bookspine5]

Skinner using Bart's words. 😅

[@colelantz1743]

Don't really blame him for saying he didn't want to reenlist. Skinner has mentioned that he was held prisoner in the Vietnam War.

[@manictiger]

+Cole McDonald Ah fuck it. Fingernails make men weak, anyway.

[@KhaiZi08]

he isnt skinner his a fake

[@nocturno7660]

Ow!

[@noneed4sleep64]

they both served together in Vietnam

[@scottlynch9842]

That elephant ate my entire platoon ;-;

[@woah-dude]

"Not wars, we're just fighting civilians"

[@MotiMota15]

No muslim civilians. All are jihadists.

[@1984Phalanx]

As a civilian with no military experience, I can confirm this is 100% accurate.

[@seosamh.forbes]

Às an army brat who lives right outside a large base, the "Anything for my beloved Army" followed by a "bite me" to the idea of re-enlisting is ridiculously accurate.

[@Inferno65]

As a guy with three friends and two in-laws who have fought in the military, I can also confirm this is 100% accurate.

[@hyperdude144]

"Damn pre-enlistment culture, what next, holding off the F-35 as pre-order DLC?"

[@Lykoloo]

Darwin makes that sound so much better

[@hyperdude144]

***** Did they fix the "missiles not launching" bug yet?

[@Jack-yz5ws]

They sold it off as a feature.

[@hyperdude144]

Jack 123610 Ugh, The AAA Military Industrial Complex is only after the money of Enlisted Pilots. Personally I prefer the classics, such as the F-15C. No pre-order bullshit, just a good missile boat with excellent RADAR and T.E.W.S capability.

[@hyperdude144]

***** "There is a Grandeur in this View of Life. Endless forms of fighter jet were, and are, being designed, with better avionics, supercruise and ECM capability".

[@ProtoMario]

Ironically accurate.

[@MausOfTheHouse]

Who are you

[@TheMrPeteChannel]

Blowing up hurricanes?

[@canadianbacon2693]

@@TheMrPeteChannel Yes

[@TheMrPeteChannel]

@@canadianbacon2693 It can be done

[@soljaism]

Like the most of it

[@timmy6890]

“How about re-enlisting?” “How about you bite me” Love it lol

[@poke548]

Oh my god, it just hit me. The music in the helicopter sequence is _The Battle on Ice_ by Sergei Prokofiev. The US Army propaganda piece is backed by a track composed by a _Soviet composer._

[@seanryan3020]

The music right after that sequence sounds very similar to Led Zeppelin's "Communication Breakdown!"

[@eeyorehaferbock7870]

@@seanryan3020and they were, of course, a British band.

[@SeanL-jw9rr]

I know, bet the writing staff assumed most viewers would be too ignorant to catch it. Good on you for spotting that, I definitely missed that one. The Zeppelin reference I DID actually catch. Then again, I'm not really a "huge" culture guy so... 😅

[@MidnightWonko]

lol, firing missiles at a deadly hurricane! That aged STUNNINGLY well!

[@iwanttzekelkantof8ckme577]

How

[@seanthomxx2694]

@@iwanttzekelkantof8ckme577 Trump allegedly proposed nuking a hurricane that was towards Florida

[@SoulCrapper]

Im wondering if that's a Hurricane Katrina reference?

[@Duke_of_Prunes]

@@seanthomxx2694 Hearsay, like much of what Trump allegedly said.

[@seanthomxx2694]

@@Duke_of_Prunes umm, that's the point of "allegedly"🙄

[@dutch_asocialite]

It's wild how the satirical advertisement meant to "poke fun" at the US Army is leagues better than the actual recruitment ads of recent memory.

[@JA-bf9ph]

Two moms.......

[@puffstanley4442]

@@JA-bf9ph no, the one where a marine kills a dragon with his sword

[@BajaToxic]

Yvan eth nioj

[@scintillam_dei]

@@JA-bf9ph Biologically impossible. Liberals don't care about reality.

[@arya31ful]

@@puffstanley4442 What happens when you cut a Marine his crayon ration.

[@AWormsPurpose]

It's surprising the military ads in the Simpsons are less crazy than in real life

[@Ussonan-Foderation2016]

My name is Emma and I have two moms... Task misunderstood. This is an ad for the army not a Disney movie about a girl in the army

[@Nooneishereonlyme]

@@Ussonan-Foderation2016what? What you mean?

[@jamescourt6554]

@@Nooneishereonlyme an american ad about gays......

[@Nooneishereonlyme]

@@jamescourt6554 oh okay

[@yellowmask1796]

" America's next unsolved conflict " Anyone wanna take any bets?

[@DOOM_A-O]

I think it will be solved for us. ☢️

[@SeanL-jw9rr]

OOOOH, OOOH, OOOOH. Over here! I got one!!!!! How 'bout "...any country without a Central Bank?" 🤣🤔🤐😪

[@alanjefferson1127]

"How about reenlisting?" "How about you bite me." Says everything you need to know right there, the voice of experience vs the enthusiasm of the kids who never served.

[@MinscFromBaldursGate92]

Newbie vs traumatized veteran

[@joe-tatothepotatobiden47]

So the bullies were veterans too?

[@isaacschmitt4803]

Yeah, that's pretty accurate.

[@abnerdoon4902]

@@joe-tatothepotatobiden47 Yeah, MW 1,2 & 3, Black Ops 1, 2 & 3, Ghosts and Advanced Warfare.

[@theradionicrevival8068]

@@joe-tatothepotatobiden47 i mean??? Yeah. Even outside of the military, bullies are people too. They 100% get jobs when they grow up and enter the working world like literally everyone else 💀

[@ShelledHandle]

You know the world is getting weirder when Season 18 of the Simpson's is now hilarious and relatable

[@DralonIsBack]

It has always been

[@mwndjddjdhdbbf8408]

Always has been

[@ShelledHandle]

I mean I've always liked stuff in this era but that's always felt like a niche opinion to have

[@leob4403]

@@ShelledHandle keep spreading the Simpsons love and the haters will hopefully shut up eventually

[@mwndjddjdhdbbf8408]

@@leob4403 these are wise words

[@Jtheman2022]

As a veteran, when Principal (Sergeant) Skinner said “bite me” to the recruiter after offering him to reenlist, I definitely felt that and laughed hard. Ironically, I re-enlisted into the Army Reserve and have a new contract 😂

[@furrycircuitry2378]

*Butthead voice* huh huh huh, this guy's a dumbass huh huh huh

[@garymcgaryson5039]

So when do you take part in the world’s next unsolvable conflict? WW3

[@gogodaal7273]

@@ecoro_ thanks judge dredd

[@Nooneishereonlyme]

@@gogodaal7273can you at least tell me what you me by that and what are you talking about and what is the point from this part of this episode of the Simpsons?

[@Nooneishereonlyme]

@@gogodaal7273what?

[@quite1enough]

Lmao when Prokofiev starts to playing and the lyrics are "Rise up, Russian people" 😅

[@TheRomanBond007]

"What, being gay?" "No son. The Navy recruiters are next door if you want to talk about that."

[@SanityDrop]

*IN THE NAVY*

[@ESport211]

Im not gay, but I'll go Navy.

[@JacobyJ56]

My grandfather was gay and was in the Navy

[@ichemosabe]

Found the gay marine lol.. Bet you draw dicks using crayons too, what a gay.

[@prudentiusinvader6652]

When no woman is around, all you got is eachother 😏

[@Fryguy76951]

This is exactly how recruiters work.

[@respt46]

exactly.

[@fredlburrows]

I was propositioned at a shopping mall when I was 18 by two army recruiters, this was right around the first or second year of the occupation of Iraq. I wasn't in a hurry and I was a polite young man so I listened to their spiel and sat down with them. They asked me a lot of personal questions like how recently I used certain drugs, and they got specific in asking what I used. I didn't use drugs and I just made up dates when they asked me when I last used "drug y" or "drug x". Later I realized they probably asking this because they knew I'd have to pass a piss test if I were seriously considering joining, which they likely thought I was since I sat down with them and was so polite, they thought they had a live one lol. They wanted to get me shipped out right away to boot camp, had to have that clean drug screen to get me on the bus.I wonder how my life would have turned out had I joined all those years ago....I don't blame the recruiters, they were overly eager, but they weren't aggressive or anything. I know they get big promotions and pay raises if they get a lot of useable recruits. A friend in the U.S. National Guard said that if I joined and listed him as the one that talked me into it, he would get a monetary bonus.

[@thirstypooch]

+fredlburrows wow mate that is red spicy, glad you didn't join

[@fredlburrows]

Thirsty pooche Things would be a lot different, that's for sure. I might have turned out to be a better person,

[@eng3d]

Transformers Battleship And every crap filmed by Michael Bay.

[@sergey_ulyanoff]

The interesting part is when Dart Vader-like knight pulls a sword from the stone the background music is “Arise, Russian people!” from “Alexander Nevsky” movie written by Sergey Prokofiev, performed by a choir actually in Russian 🤔

[@Lubyagin]

Всегда интересно посмотреть, как американцы чувствуют нашу музыку.

[@dlr759]

@@Lubyagin иронично . чувствуют

[@adamcheklat7387]

@@Lubyagin I’m Canadian and i think you guys have the best classical music there is!

[@Lubyagin]

@@adamcheklat7387 на фоне современной музыки, классика довольно глубоко, размерено и местами успокаивающе звучит.

[@adamcheklat7387]

@@Lubyagin It really stirs the passion held within a man’s very soul.

[@bajorekjon]

Nuking a hurriciane... the Simpsons really do predict everything.

[@user-cr6qv1bn2u]

Because it was in a proposal when nukes were still new and it's harmful effects were still unknown to the general public. It was rejected even back in the 59s.

[@jarrettcranston2431]

“How about re-enlisting?” “How about you bite me?” As a veteran, I laughed so hard beer came out my nose.

[@osets2117]

Truer words never spoken

[@muzahid9027]

didnt get it though

[@hyliasknight]

@@muzahid9027 he would rather be bitten than reenlist.

[@kil2250]

@@hyliasknight the real mvp

[@circle7motorsports]

Frfr how quick it came out too.

[@wessltov]

0:47 "Well, we'll just have to go younger" This sentence never leads to anything good

[@MinscFromBaldursGate92]

Ahahah child soldiers.

[@SeanL-jw9rr]

I mean, ...it can when you have an aging linebacker stuck on your roster, ...I suppose. But barring that one single rare instance, ...I am certain you are correct! Lol ☺

[@ob2kenobi388]

"We just want to talk to you about something near and dear to us!" "What, being gay?" That would be the navy lol

[@ColeBresnehen]

The military isn’t gay you just give your brother in arms a reach around everyone knows this

[@streetlight197]

As someone who enlisted five years ago I can confirm that you get to perform on stage with Lincoln on tambourine. 10/10.

[@sailordarty9032]

"How about re-enlisting?" "How about you bite me?"

[@Agent1W]

+Dartanyan Elson Damn, this Simpsons clip is life-imitated art!

[@cm-pr2ys]

I was gonna like your comment, but you have 420 likes so I guess I’ll leave it at that lol. Semper Fi, hope you EAS’d and life is good for you

[@jonathansalvador1104]

*Laughs in DD-214*

[@milo20060]

I lolled.

[@BrokenOcktive2]

"OK ill bits you once in a spot of your choice if it means you re-enlist?"

[@theodenmannix4362]

"Not 'wars', global struggles!" Ah yes, in 'special military operations'

[@thegrandestbazaar4800]

To which i say the world is cruel

[@MLBlue30]

You too can protect the oil investments of old rich men who see you as replaceable cannon fodder! Jump, die and be forgotten brave soldier! May your destiny be decided by those who never fought for anything their entire lives.

[@mukelorata2100]

Jihad means struggle in arabic. So, it’s global jihad!

[@flawer1316]

Its not an invasion, its a peacekeeping operation!

[@Tomoki_Robo]

@@flawer1316 *teaching freedom & democracy

[@chickencurry420]

I love when Skinner says "How bout you bite me?" and he's not even looking at him when he says it

[@micahphilson]

"We just want to talk to you about something near and dear to our hearts!" "Being gay?" "Close, the Army!"

[@harryb7505]

I think my favorite part was acknowledging that they always use half pencils during these kinds of assemblies.

[@shmikeyify]

Some where there are lots of kids with just the eraser half of the pencil.

[@aaronmarks9366]

Fucking half-pencils, how do they work?

[@legogenius1667]

The smart kids learned to sell attachable erasers to the other kids for gum or part of their lunch.

[@cattysplat]

Nothing like feeling valued like being handed a blunt pencil stub to write your credentials lol.

[@retroblue69696]

we will save you a spot in America's next unresolvable conflict lol

[@Agent1W]

+Epix As Donald Trump once asked, "When was the last time we won a war?"

[@mrbibs350]

Indisputably? Uh... 1945.

[@lianhector9546]

+Agent1W OH Ive got an idea. You know why the war with iraq started! What about we suspect that the USA have toxic gas weapons and they are hiding them in .. Lets say in Area 51 then everyone could start a war with the US! Well we arent doing that because then we, the US and the rest of the world would be bombed into oblivion

[@conradvonhotzendorf5134]

+mrbibs350 well technally yes since the us hasn't been at war since 41 congress didn't declare war after all the armed conflicts

[@theyellowwall7842]

+mrbibs350 try 1865, you yanks didn't win WW2, the soviets did, conpletely destroyed berlin and the nazi party in general. Like my dad used to say, the only war the US ever won was their own LOL

[@aplainname5849]

the Dearborn Michigan line kills me every time.

[@hansmxlvii]

"Being gay?" "Close!" 😭😭

[@justinkubusch1336]

Skinner: I would do anything for my beloved army. Army guy: Well how about reenlisting? Skinner: How about you bite me?

[@nunez3613]

fucking priceless

[@justinkubusch1336]

shrum Sometimes, when a funny thing happens, people like to post it in the comments.

[@legendofnorn647]

i think i have heard it somewhere,but...cant recall now. xD

[@ImMagnetz]

You watched the video too?!

[@BenSmith-xq2ng]

Ye we know we just watched the video

[@hamishdow2188]

skinner is a perfect representation of almost every vet when anyone attempts reenlistment

[@Motownsports89]

Almost

[@Maros554]

1:15 gets me every time :D

[@TheWillvoss]

"listen to those half pencils scribble.'

[@jettiz3703]

"How do you do, fellow kids."

[@Marylandbrony]

Jettiz The beginning was. But the ad was not at all.

[@dannymain542]

It's funny how the old Simpson episodes make sense once you get older. As a kid I couldn't comprehend most of the satires and jokes about the US since I'm not American

[@raketny_hvost]

That happens. I myself also found some multiplication examples or books accurate or carrying some important thoughts.

[@levyan4718]

That's the point

[@daftwod]

This was made a decade after the show became shit

[@samiamrg7]

The funniest part to me is the military ad. There are some specific irl military ads that they were parodying there.

[@lordvader3538]

@RaTPac lol wut?

[@Panzer_the_Merganser]

Gotta love the song being played at the concert at the end of the clip is called ‘Communication Breakdown.’

[@Ussonan-Foderation2016]

Fun fact:there are a FEW recruiters that aren't this way. Three army ones that i saw just told a few stories about why they were there, an aur force recruiter said it generally sucked, but as long as you behaved, it was nice, and a navy recruiter just said it sucks. Dont join unless you have to.

[@tanith117]

And yet the army still somehow makes it boring to hang out with your friends, Exercise and shoot guns all day.

[@wilsonchoque4025]

Still better than watching anime

[@zomge_videos]

"Friends" "All day"

[@theperv01]

Right..... sweep, shine, stand around all day in the same spot exposed to the elements, sweep, shine get yelled at by superiors for not sweeping and shining, drills more drills even more drills latrine duty, oh yea heck of fun

[@deafmusician2]

Military can take the fun out of ANYTHING

[@who_this_king]

@@TheFlameHaze1 What the fuck are you even talking about??

[@unnamednewbie13]

I came here to watch a Simpsons clip. Instead I get a legitimate US Army pitch.

[@kennygudz9326]

@Nuclear Nadal obviously you didn't get his

[@slenderboygraveman6437]

Nuclear Nadal r/wooosh

[@bodbn]

While you idiots argue amongst yourselves I just went and enlisted. Go Army!

[@nickkohlmann]

@@bodbn This is a joke right

[@nickkohlmann]

@Nuclear Nadal NO U

[@GuyMan9668]

“Well, how about reenlisting?” “How ‘bout you bite me?”

[@strakhovandrri]

I was puzzled a bit when I heard a part of cantata 'Alexander Nevsky' which is called 'Arise, Russian people!' Lyrics go "Arise, Russian people! To the horrible battle, to the mortal battle! Arise, Russian people For our honest land!"

[@tf2dudebot]

I had US Army people try to enlist young men in my high school. It seemed really sketchy and they did things like hold contests in the quad to see who could do the most push-ups. They also went around handing out flyers. "Get 'em young" seems to be their motto.

[@jamiemaster101]

the whole get em young, means that your dumb enough to join most people do it just so they can have a pension payed to them by the army

[@jacobmolyneux4138]

Yeah a couple of times at my school we had recruiters

[@unmessable12]

yeah the same thing happened in mine though it was pull ups. That said the only people who hung around them were the kids who were already going to join up, and since my school has JROTC it didn't really make any difference

[@BigWheel.]

Aaron Bergey You Former military yourself?

[@whhe11]

Aaron Bergey Yeah man up and join the army, right, man up and help out your fellow citizens in your own country. We have children without parents, homeless without food, veterans without anything, we need help building here in our own country more then we need more boots on the ground making us look like imperialists in other sovereign nations that should be handling their own conflicts half way around the globe.

[@gravedigr12]

well how about re enlisting ? how about you bite me ? hahahaha

[@Ultra289]

How about you do a steamed ham?

[@johndegorter5262]

“Sir, there’s a category 5 hurricane headed for the pentagon, what do we do?” “Eh, fire mussels at it”

[@amezonian]

Still better then "i had two moms" military ad.

[@TheActualJae]

“Not wars, ‘global struggles’” -huh, familiar sounding line for some reason. Feel like I’ve heard it recently.

[@interview1296]

I feel like Russia copied something.

[@iwanttzekelkantof8ckme577]

@@interview1296 please shut up loads or wars happen I have no IDEA WHY THIS JAY RETARD IS SO POPULAR

[@typingcat]

Globalen Kampf.

[@TheActualJae]

@@iwanttzekelkantof8ckme577 Uh, because I’m super hot, it makes up for it.

[@eezlummockelchev420]

@@TheActualJae Nice energy dude. But are you really popular?

[@Galaction585]

1:26 this is russian song "Arise, Russian People!", from the Soviet film "Alexander Nevsky" (1938)

[@nerfshooter4216]

Ironic

[@jvbiians2358]

Thank you good sir

[@bulata3393]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/jqjVhZRsfaaKfsU

[@LudwigVanBeethoven3000]

Prokovief - Battle on Ice

[@soljaism]

Who would have thought that

[@justinskornia123]

As being a soldier for 3 years now, I love this.

[@thedukeofswellington1827]

The army with Washington and Lincoln playing communication breakdown...awesome

[@Ser_Redshirt]

"How about you reenlist?" "Hows about you bite me." Most Veteran statement maybe ever.

[@georgiahoosier]

Back in the 70s the Air Force had a traveling presentation that wasn't much different than this. When they came to our high school everyone was required to see it. About all I remember was their "rock band" asking "what kind of person doesn't join up?" and then they played "Nowhere Man". Very subtle!

[@BrianKabonyo]

Lol

[@iorilamia]

They did the same thing in the mid 2000’s

[@StraightEdgeSieghart]

Hahahaha I think I just died on the Army's rock band playing Nowhere Man hahahaha

[@fiyahquacker2835]

(Born in 1998) The worst I got growing up here in new Zealand was some Christian stuff around 9-10yrs old that even then felt like complete bs.

[@chompythebeast]

Good opportunity to get suspended lol What're they gonna do, not let you watch the Imperial propaganda?

[@Optimal88]

Thats the goddamn Halo 3 AR reticle

[@AlastorNightheart]

those last two lines made me laugh in tears.

[@almuhaaajir]

The most accurate part was going for younger gullible kids to brainwash.

[@iLegault]

boo hoo

[@covelatedspire42]

I remember when they started showing up at the middle schools around here

[@typingcat]

That is why the Left are so angry that DeSantis banned teaching about sexual orientations to prepubescent children.

[@CollinMcLean]

Recruiters were always around my high school for the Navy, the Army, or the Marines. Every other day in the cafeteria there was a recruiter. And they were choosing their targets carefully. It was usually public schools in poorer neighborhoods where they showed up.

[@Soulthief4056]

@@CollinMcLean yeah right. They only picked up the men out of the boys. They don’t pick up kids that’ll wipe out

[@conserva-chan2735]

"We just wanna talk about something near and dear to us!" "What, being gay?" "Close, the army!" *Writing: 100*

[@samfish90212]

My father was in the military and nearly rolled out of his seat laughing when he heard that line.

[@osets2117]

"what being gay?" "That would be the navy son"

[@conserva-chan2735]

@@osets2117 **in the navy plays**

[@osets2117]

@@conserva-chan2735 lol

[@TheFiresloth]

That's a lot of jokes in a few minutes for season 18.

[@ryleeculla5570]

I’m realizing that the helicopter scene is literally featuring all of America’s Enemys

[@CardinalSynth]

1:48 So that's where Trump got the idea of nuking a hurricane

[@guccithickums]

USA🇺🇸 USA🇺🇸 USA🇺🇸

[@deevancheg]

In the scene with a knight choir singing "Arise, Russian people, to fight hard, fight to the death." For me, a resident of Russia, it looks very funny - advertising the US Army and the Russian opera.

[@Simbirsk2130]

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arise,_Russian_people! It is from our 1938 movie "Alexander Nevsky", which portrays the fight with teutonic knights, who tried to conquer Rus in 1242 (back when America wasn't discovered by the Europeans in the first place). I really have got no idea, how it relates to the US Army, unless there is some hidden Illuminati meaning to it.

[@pietrocampagnoli5322]

I think is the satire of Simpson's writers

[@petar.banovac]

Really? Last time I checked there used to be a red flag in Berlin, but no swastikas in Moscow.

[@LonginusFX]

Do you really think they won because they're better men?

[@Simbirsk2130]

If that is so, then why did the "superior German Prussian military might" always lose to our country?

[@Panzer_the_Merganser]

Just think, years later a president did ponder bombing a hurricane.

[@manuel.camelo]

Ahahahah BART.. > 😅

[@slurmitshighlyaddictive5641]

"close...the army" fucking lol

[@Rubashow]

"Wait, I'm shooting AT Germans? That's not how I remember it."

[@ContextEffects]

What's that a reference to?

[@Rubashow]

Mr Burns.

[@ContextEffects]

In what episode?

[@robertjarman3703]

They did in fact have helicopters in WW2, but they were really basic and prototype models.

[@kawaii-five-0912]

It's; Wait i'm fighting the Nazi's, that's not how i remember it.

[@blacktronpavel]

“How about re-enlisting?” “How about you bite me?” 😂

[@cyberlinkstudios6518]

2:43 that ending

[@19MAD95]

How about you bite me... Lololololol dying

[@WTechRepair]

the hurricane thing was when we tried to bomb a hurricane

[@loganbaileysfunwithtrains606]

Better recruitment ad then Emma and her moms

[@bochar5215]

1:30 I like how the song is Russian song "Arise, Russian people!" ("Вставайте, люди русские!")

[@360milliondollars]

2:35 He's gone through it and Knows there's no help after you get out...LOL

[@andrewg3196]

"comedy now is too political" Comedy then:

[@chom6096]

“What, being gay?” “Close, the army!”

[@williamED15]

"Dearborn Michigan?" Clever Simpson writers; Dearborn has the highest Arab-American population in the US

[@mukelorata2100]

I know that but i still don’t get it.

[@natebit7167]

@@mukelorata2100 US fight arabs

[@sillybilly686]

World's highest outside middle east

[@murraytc4641]

I thought that was Indonesia

[@sillybilly686]

@@murraytc4641 muslims maybe, Arabs no.

[@nerfshooter4216]

"How about re-enlisting" "How about you bite me" XD Pretty damn accurate

[@MrMichaelHouse]

"We'll save you a spot in the next unresolvable conflict!"

[@jtrib1549]

"I'm imagining that knight as me!" *Turns into a helicopter*

[@aDarkRedJungle]

I almost died when I heard "Arise, Ye Russian People" at 1:33. I love how The Simpsons has made such great and repeated use of Prokofiev!

[@jeo1812]

This reminds me of that recent US Army ad I saw on TV obviously targeted at video game fans, "What type of warrior are you?"

[@FamishedYoshi]

"The Replenisher" 🤣🤣

[@oscarh.970]

i was thinking the same thing!

[@Epicgirl368]

@@FamishedYoshi the fact that the U.S army the most funded thing in the U.S had the idea to say hey instead of cook let’s call them replenishers makes me laugh

[@linusp9316]

The Army had its own video game for around 20 years, until just recently. I never played it, but it was supposedly not a terrible game, by early-2000s standards.

[@satiricalzero]

@@linusp9316 America's Army. Clearly a recruiting tool, but it was a really solid team play FPS compared to the fast pace shooters of the time.

[@jakanz]

"We want to talk about something near and dear to us." "What, being gay?" "Close. The Army!"

[@ALGfunk]

You start as a mercenary and end up as a walking PTSD....

[@TheMrPeteChannel]

Join the army. Blow up hurricanes.

[@ItzDrPlow]

then rock out

[@samanli-tw3id]

The Mr. Pete Channel needs 700 subs! And Nutsees