the Snacks at Trader Joe's that Only Women Can See

[@olivernisbet1120]

'Look me in the glasses' is now forever seared into my lexicon thanks

[@DeathnoteBB]

It’s like something a cartoon character says (affectionate)

[@SpecialInterestShow]

I'm gonna start saying "now, you look me in the contacts and tell me-"

[@LibertyMonk]

And the digital meeting app alternative: "look me in the camera"

[@blakewhite3131]

It helps that he has the bulkiest clear frames I've ever seen

[@andrewbarrett1537]

He knows his glasses are massive and uses this opportunity to make a roundabout joke. It is doubly funny because he makes allusion to the prominence (size or thickness) of the glasses, without mentioning those qualities directly, leaving the audience to fill in the rest immediately. Thanks for reading another installment of "Andrew inadvertently kills the joke by explaining it."

[@kemipova]

i love how chris's delivery is less that of a person performing a comedy routine and more of a mad prophet desperately trying to tell everyone in the town square about the face of god while doing unorthodox aerobic exercises

[@RubyBlueUwU]

Chris is our oracle of Delphi

[@mikahbee]

Nailed it!

[@neuroqueercoach]

Yeah, I always have thought that Chris would be a favorite of Dionysius.

[@mellaniethompson7444]

Really does the Susie Izzard routine and I'm so here for it

[@kgallchobhair]

​@@RubyBlueUwUIf the oracle of delphi was Gene Simmons 😆

[@doctorwholover1012]

I LOST it at "I'm on the circumference" *does a merry little circular jig*

[@juanpablorobayo9891]

i was expecting him to say "the sir-cumference, cuz i'm a guy"

[@bustedkeaton]

This was killing me too

[@lethersing5909]

Futurama dr Zoidberg-like 😂😂😂

[@IvyGrass]

One day 10 years ago my dad walked into Trader Joe's and was asked by someone working there if he needed help finding anything. My dad said "Inner Peace" because he's a middle-aged white man and can't just say "No I'm good, thanks". But to this Trader Joe's employees eternal credit, she said "We have that" and brought him to the aisle where the Inner Peas snacks are. Now I know there's no way he would have found them had this woman not helped him 😂

[@kafitty]

Masterful counter of the dad joke. I hope that woman is having a glorious day today 😂

[@chatsnoirblamo]

😂😂😂😂

[@SynthApprentice]

To be fair, though, DOES he need help finding inner peace?

[@Jay-p8z2d]

This has gotta be an act of God 😂🤣😭 the heavenly Father straight up dad-joking ur dad lmaoooo ❤😂

[@Goldenretriever-k8m]

He thought he won but she one upped him lol

[@clayzulah]

Chris walks a unique line between "observational comedy" and "channeling unknowable chaos via incredibly specific metaphors"

[@haleywilson520]

The specificity of his comedy is just...*chef's kiss*

[@susanwright6168]

He literally walks a unique line 😂

[@em.lane.p]

The absurdity would never work if not for the relatability and nuggets of truth. It’s a brilliant balance he has.

[@itschelseakay]

This description couldn’t be any more accurate

[@noisepuppet]

With a twist of mime

[@aacsmiles]

Chris Fleming is a medieval court jester who somehow time traveled and just said, “Eh, guess this is what I’m doing now…”

[@ericae.6547]

That is a perfect description 😂

[@vlogily8043]

“Stand up, eh, I haveth doneth this beforeth, but they calleth it court jestory!”

[@somethingboldanddifferent]

This premise needs to be a TV show. I'd watch it!

[@ShellBAtoms]

huzzah!

[@liviamcalee2894]

He does bear an uncanny resemblance to Schmendrick in The Last Unicorn!

[@thrownstair]

Chris Fleming is the only person in America who is

[@WoWpreformer]

Rated comment right here ☝️

[@themedia1271]

This is truly the comment

[@soro2001]

so true❤

[@partlyironic]

always saying this

[@eliza6971]

This is

[@TheMaeSeven]

I especially love this because I've worked at several Whole Foods in the Boston area and I've seen Chris at each of them, always dressed like a lawn ornament

[@EvlNabiki]

If I could pin one comment straight into my mind, it'd be this 😌

[@gilgograboid8244]

It's great to see he's taking the "Koresh" look back from evil guy-

[@asecretchannel4135]

This is too f’n funny 😂

[@nobodyanon]

Holy fuck the unholy sound I just laughed

[@emjots]

DJXKFKFBISBSOWBFKFKD

[@mikececconi2677]

Your comedy is an ancient door, beautifully unhinged.

[@raynebow5289]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[@lynetteminute]

gave me a GoT flashback just now.

[@Aureilia]

I'm convinced Chris doesn't plan a routine or even schedule gigs, he just appears on theatre stages and talks until he is set free

[@jennyrice6065]

😂😂😂

[@andrewstewart1464]

Absolutely. This guy just observes shit over 1-3 weeks and them jumps on stage and TELLS you about it! I respect that hustle.

[@wishiwasaminiplane]

the way he dances around the stage, deftly avoiding stepping on the mic wire... mesmerizing

[@RubyBlueUwU]

He’s like if a gazelle were a woman that was a man

[@caspenbee]

Fleming has the loosest knees and hips of anyone I've seen

[@Who-en2vo]

I have ehlers danlos aka so flexible it’s a medical condition and I have to agree 😂😂😂

[@juliannaclayton3569]

​@@Who-en2vo Lol, came here to say he probs has eds 😂

[@Rain_Reign]

Welp looks like I found my bendy peeps 😂🦓♥️

[@Beelzebubby91]

@@Who-en2vo hello fellow bendy person

[@andrewbarrett1537]

He could be a champion cakewalker if he set his mind to it.

[@paadoxal]

i spent the whole run time of this video thinking he's gonna tangle his lanky legs in that mic cable and fall and i have no idea how he didn't

[@johnnyvacant4903]

You can thank Kevin McGee for that grace

[@Kristenhas3cats]

He's like that old man played by Dick Vandyke in Mary Poppins, wobbling all around and then breaking into graceful dance moves

[@lono9416]

I was thinking how he must have practiced that for 10,000 hours to be so good at it 🤔

[@siluriantides]

I am also Ichabod Crane-shaped, and I always trip over myself. I have all the grace of a Gruiformes bird and the clumsiness of a drunk giraffe.

[@5050TM]

Dick Van Dyke legs

[@novatornado5576]

"I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by Trader Joe's madness, starving hysterical naked, men dragging themselves through the aisles at dawn looking for an angry fix of unknown snacks..."

[@RubyBlueUwU]

How. How does he just make these sentences out of nothing.

[@blipboop5594]

In my hungry fatigue, and shopping for images, I walked into Trader Joe's and discovered a new variety of deep sea mossballs

[@someone9331]

LMAOOOO

[@Lucifersfursona]

Chris is the only person where everything he says is real

[@nicolegirard2325]

Ahahahhahaha a quirky TJ spin on Allen Ginsberg’s Howl!! Chris is a genius. 😂😂😂

[@UserNameUnavailableAtThisTime]

What a whiplash to watch this and then immediately be shown a Mint Mobile ad. It feels like Ryan Reynolds is forcing you back into the Matrix.

[@ivesphillips]

Oh, God, you're right. 😵‍💫

[@Punmaestro]

Oh my god I got one too 😭😭

[@lphastings]

Damn dude, that’s profound.

[@blep668]

Hahaha poetic

[@natatattful]

Too apt

[@pencilstreak9]

chris continues to speak nothing but truth to the masses

[@CodyWhy]

"Everything the Seagull Didn't Want" killed me 🤣🤣🤣

[@ruthcassidy6052]

The only thing I've ever found that a seagull rejected outright was a rice cake. Couldn't blame the guy; I was tossing them outside for somebody else to eat so I didn't have to. (Same place, saw a seagull swoop down and steal an entire STEAK off a guy's plate.)

[@moonlight_scribe]

Me too

[@Ma_pricot]

As a paleobotanist I'm afraid I've only been to a TJ maybe three times in my life and when I was there I didn't make any breakthroughs, therefore subjecting my gender to serious inquiry

[@iluvhammys]

ARE YOU EVEN ALLOWED TO COMPETE IN THE SNACK GAMES :O

[@Ma_pricot]

@@iluvhammys all I have are some file boxes full of ancient plants handed over by long retired professors idk you tell me. Would love to know what 3000 year old corn tastes like hardest part of the job keeping myself in check

[@torreykat]

@@Ma_pricot oh my god you're one of the ones who could actually help us make the forbidden sandwich of archaeology

[@ThunderStruck15]

​@@Ma_pricot have you tried crook necked watermellon yet?

[@ZijnShayatanica]

I'm a trans man, but when I recently went to a Trader Joe's with my cis boyfriend, he experienced a level of disorientation I can only compare to a fugue state - meanwhile I was able to navigate the aisles & find sustenance. The only point at which he was grounded back into reality was upon seeing a carton of eggs. I'm not sure whether the snacks are invisible to men & AMAB people, or if there's just a disruptive field that causes selective vision loss; there should be studies on this phenomenon.

[@lwilso9152]

The amount of 70’s vibes oozing from this man is unspeakable

[@morgankelly3056]

Think my mother had a tryst with him thinking she was having a lesbian experience...that's how I am.

[@pencilstreak9]

one time i went to a trader joes and the cashier took one look at me and wordlessly slipped me a business card to the local dispensary lmfao

[@Jenee426]

LMFAOOO

[@meremeth]

What's a dispensary I'm not American Legal marijuana seller?

[@Fakan]

@@meremeth Yep, that's correct. Well, that and all the other weed-adjacent concoctions the hippies have been sciencing up.

[@TheManyThings]

A cashier was once being so polite and having mundane conversations with everyone, started ringing up my mom and casually asks her about committing mild ebt fraud. And he was correct, she did have the information he sought.

[@schoo9256]

​@@TheManyThingsWhat is ebt?

[@MarnieWithSnakes]

Imagine if conservatives now start defining being a woman as someone able to make paleobotanical discoveries at TJ’s

[@LoneWulf278]

😂😂

[@norse1585]

sounds more like a liberal move if I'm being honest lol, aren't we the camp that has new modern definitions of the word woman + tend to be vegans? stereotypical of course but y'know. lol

[@artisan2906]

@@norse1585 huh

[@KatarinaHarrington]

​@@norse1585 yeah the conservatives would get mad and loud about the word "paleobotanical"

[@Lucifersfursona]

@@norse1585deception: 0 type comment

[@GeomancerFelix]

Hi, I'm male, I work at Trader Joes. I was wondering what kind of invisible bundles of crinkly mass I was stocking in the shelf every day, now I know. Also explains why half of this sh!t doesnt even scan properly at checkout 😂

[@LiminalLion]

Omg do they pay in karma points or something? How does it work? Ask your female coworkers.

[@Charlotte-zj8rq]

I was looking for chocolate covered potato chips I had bought there before. I asked a guy and he had ZERO clue what I was talking about avout

[@bryanchandler3486]

​@@Charlotte-zj8rqI asked an older looking employee about their fish tanks the other day and he was very confused and then later on as I was about to exit the store he approached me and told me that his oldest co-worker who had been working even longer than him remembered when trader Joe's had fish tanks.

[@TheBluestflamingos]

​@@Charlotte-zj8rq those are so good! Totally worth presenting offerings to your local coven if you happen to lack The Sight of Womanhood

[@sunrope77]

@@Charlotte-zj8rqpotato chips? I’ve only ever heard of the chocolate covered plantain chips

[@Paylala]

The way he effortlessy nailed the alien clicking sound from Arrival has me convinced he worked in the audio department on that film.

[@sydneygorelick7484]

A classic Chris Flemming segment: funny walks, strange foley, and something extremely fucking specific that somehow everyone understands and agrees with XD

[@thesewinggeekmiri9029]

and inevitable kicking.

[@a.p.2356]

I am immensely impressed by this guy's ability to do observational comedy about a thing *literally no one has every observed or thought ever*, and sell it so convincingly that you're like "haha women really do become higher dimensional beings in Trader Joe's while my finger is stuck in the syrup container, so true."

[@anthrop0phag]

127 hours in the sizzurp is fucking incredible

[@trompeta79]

That's the point he won me and I worked in food coops for years

[@SlowJamsAndJellies]

Chris Fleming literally did a 6 minute set about "women shopping" and everyone loved it 😂 Send this to every dad, uncle, and conservative comedian who thinks you can't say any of this without getting cancelled

[@aboz8649]

Yeah!

[@DillyBlue]

It hadn't even clicked in my head that this is technically a joke about "women shopping" but I guess that just goes to show that there's not really any topic that's "off-limits" (as some like to believe) as long as you're actually being funny and original and wanting your audience to have a good time instead of telling the same tired jokes from fifty years ago because you're bitter about women having equal rights.

[@sylph8005]

I feel like the AFAB line *might* get him canceled but we’ll see how it plays out

[@katzbac]

​@sylph8005 as an afab, it was hilarious, he really do be seeing us fall to our knees 😂

[@itsdrgrandpa]

@@sylph8005 my only thought was that it made the joke sound dated! Not cancelable or anything, lol, just made me go "OH, i know when this was written" for a split second. :)

[@madamehogan8553]

Organic dried mango slices, baby. Not for the lads. The secret is, that whole place is a snack store.

[@Giguv05]

As a lad, I love me some nonorganic mangoes

[@kateohdowd]

my brother lives off those things.

[@magicsofa]

don't listen she's purposely leading us astray

[@TiOnemorename]

Oh yeah. Stick 'em in the freezer so they're crunchy. Ahhh...

[@mahalat84]

Not for the lads 😂

[@StarscreamsGirl]

I have literally been at parties where women circle up and exchange their Trader Joe’s intel btw

[@MollyBlueDawn]

I am the Queen of those women.

[@kitbracadabra]

No same!!

[@MollyBlueDawn]

@@kitbracadabra I tip my crown to you, O Honoured Sister in Snack!

[@mahalat84]

I was at TJ's last night and I asked an employee about this baharat seasoning mix that I got there once but hadn't seen in a while. I spelled it for him and he went to look it up. Came back and said "It isn't even in the computer." They break our hearts but we keep coming back.

[@Mazapanzer]

As an AFAB FtM I am slowly losing my ability to find the secrets in Trader Joe’s and I am desperately hanging on

[@5Demona5]

I hope you wrote them down before you forgot, because we're not sharing the secrets anymore

[@TedExTheGreat]

on the perimeter of the coven, but your slipping away!

[@ZijnShayatanica]

Hang onto your powers! Double agents are an invaluable resource to enact the trans agenda! I've been on Testosterone for a little under two years but I still managed to find the vegan peanut butter cups & tempura-fried seaweed chips. You can beat this!! 💕

[@Goatings]

Chris just. Gets it. I feel understood when he speaks; ive never forgotten the he-niece of lucifer

[@RubyBlueUwU]

Exactly like I’m not sure what it is he gets…but he gets it and I feel seen.

[@KitKat_293]

chris is absolutely the guard doing rounds on the outskirts of the coven who only walks in a circular pattern so you can sneak past him using stealth

[@tripthelightfantastic6519]

"kicking the bell with their Merrells..." I lost it.

[@GaiaCarney]

‘lichen grown on a Caribou’s cooter’ made me snort 😂

[@GinaGreenlee]

That was hysterical and brilliant. And correct. I work in an office filled with women who routinely discover Trader Joe food discoveries. And yes, I am their leader.

[@ewade4495]

The only time I went to Trader Joe’s was after an 8 hour flight, Friday evening in New York. There was no clear layout or way to navigate, the signs said things like “crunch time!” or “let’s get spicy!” It was bright like an interrogation. I saw a woman stacking shelves who had just given up and was resting her forehead on a pile of granola bars. I left with frozen vegan enchiladas and a kind of white strawberry that was supposed to taste like pineapple. It’s one of the worst places I’ve ever been. I’m nonbinary.

[@arsonwithstyle3122]

That truly does sound like Limbo

[@kagitsune]

This reads reads like a classic Tumblr reblog, help, I am crying 😂😂

[@bronzeowl9]

thank you for sharing your story

[@sashie253]

😭🤩😂😂😂

[@stormaggeden]

Thank you for sharing your story, brave soul

[@cashcorum]

it looks like chris is having such a good time with the audience, like, when he did that little smile at “paleobotanical discoveries”

[@ElizaAspen]

humongous sideshow bob energy but like if he was happy and also kind of a girl

[@mikahbee]

I have never heard or read a more accurate description of Chris

[@Leafpool2]

I'm entranced by this combination of words, thank you.

[@formerdungeonmaster1232]

Sideshow Bob is deeply closeted in my head-canon

[@ElizaAspen]

@@formerdungeonmaster1232 I think of him as a classic toxic nonbinary twink, with strong bizarro closeted lesbian undertones

[@ghostfiish]

Gonna have to steal "look me in the glasses"

[@manyscissors]

him saying that literally makes me wish I wore glasses

[@potato9832]

@@manyscissors You can wear sunglasses.

[@manyscissors]

@@potato9832 thanks i will

[@crisptomato9495]

I live in a country without Trader Joe’s and this is my main introduction to it. I thought they sold like, trail mix and jerky not GOOP rejects lol. I think the flip side of this is men inexplicably knowing exactly which friend owns the particular car part they need. You never see them go to a mechanic, they all just have a hive mind they use to communicate with each other and psychically connect with Steve on Alder St. who has a 1984 Chevy Impala muffler they can pick up on Sunday afternoon when he’s off early from work because their hick cousin Randy got drunk and clipped a fire hydrant while borrowing the car and now the exhaust is fucked.

[@keythah]

The nerd man version of this is cables/cords. Also organization for said cables/cords.

[@aboz8649]

Yeah you got it

[@film9491]

As far as I know GOOP doesn't sell anything edible. Trader Joe's on the other hand is a grocery store that mostly sells snacks, wine, and freezer meals. They also have a small produce section, eggs and milk, and flowers. They do indeed sell trail mix and jerky. Many flavors of trail mix. Some of their snacks have more creative flavors than you would find in a more typical grocery store, which is what this bit is about.

[@crisptomato9495]

@@film9491 ah ok, cool!

[@kccgurl]

The snacks aren't GOOP rejects, they are some of the best food you've ever had.

[@d.w.stratton4078]

As a vegan goth crustpunk, let me just say: Chris knows too much about our donkey plot and we must take them out!

[@ZijnShayatanica]

With our hooves!

[@awesomecat26]

i love how all of chris fleming's comedy sketches could also be one man shows at a black box theater in midtown that people leave and go 'i didnt get it'

[@candyzombiee]

as a trans man can confirm, once i started hormones the ability to see the snacks dissipated like smoke in a private school bathroom when the nuns walk in

[@Fool_esq]

Same man, sometimes I skip the shot just so I can find a new snack to try /s

[@lousielouise8716]

cosigned. its crazy, i miss so many ube flavored items now

[@catbox1677]

i've never been to trader joe's, my mind hasn't been touched by the ancient knowledge of my foremothers. The knowledge hasn't been gifted to me, so I know not how to miss it. In this way, I am free.

[@puckbethel]

as a trans woman I'm just glad I can go to trader joe's on my own now instead of having to bring someone who can see the snacks

[@DeathnoteBB]

@@candyzombiee As an agender person afab I avoid Trader Joe’s, the overwhelming need to collapse every time someone finds a new chex mix flavor makes it hard to shop :(

[@merrystyles]

This is 💯 Went to TJs with my bf yesterday and he kept saying “where did you find that?” Every time I put something in the basket. Only purchase he made was blue corn tortilla chips. LMAO😂

[@ZijnShayatanica]

Same situation here but his sole acquisition was a carton of eggs. It was like he started sleepwalking the moment we entered the threshold of that store.

[@mrjimbo15243]

Always a strong sense of whiplash when Chris' stream of consciousness that has meandered all the way to Narnia reverts quickly back to the title topic: very strong rollercoaster vibes for the psyche, a true thrill.

[@z-beeblebrox]

2:34 lol I genuinely thought this was some vintage standup clip from the 70s that someone dug up, until this moment where he references Arrival XD

[@Langorithmic]

absolutely same

[@sydposting]

It took me so many revolutions around that stage for me to realize those pants weren't on backwards.

[@parktech238]

i just love that the camera quality and lighting of chris's live videos has remained the same for like 15 years. stay tru to ur roots

[@lukulus-prime]

The Arrival bit was pure genius holy crap Chris

[@mistydayremainsofthejudgment]

chris is the king of hyperspecific jokes that are made for a few people who will laugh uproariously while the rest don't get it

[@MilesToGoGo]

Omg exactly how I felt when he said “Isadora Duncan-ing around” because literally nobody would get that reference if they haven’t studied modern dance in some capacity 😂😂

[@cameronschyuder9034]

@@MilesToGoGoyour comment just made me remember Isadora Duncan was a dancer lol. I only know her bc she was married to a Russian dude at some point and I took Russian classes at the time. That joke is funnier (slightly) knowing the context lol

[@MilesToGoGo]

@@cameronschyuder9034 exactly, I only know her because I used to take dance, specifically modern dance, and we learned about her. He even imitated her signature arm movements when we was dancing lol

[@vivsevs1087]

@@MilesToGoGo god i took modern all 4 years in college and this joke still didn't hit me

[@helpfulcommenter]

the few people: every white city-dwelling hipster?

[@lzgnooop]

everything the seagull didn't want can do WONDERS to avocado you thought had had its last day

[@SpecialInterestShow]

Lmaooo

[@snowbeast4463]

Chris Fleming will never run out of Trader Joe's content.

[@mtfoxx3]

As a Trader Joe's employee of 3 years, who spent one of those years working at the corporate headquarters, this is all correct. Rare Snacks That Only Women Can Find (list is by no means comprehensive) -Dried hibiscus flowers -Hot chocolate flavored cream cheese -Synergistically Seasoned Popcorn (I can only describe the flavor as: yes) -Dark Chocolate Covered Powerberries (no clue what a powerberry is) -Cheeseburger Burrito -Pineapple Chile Kettle corn -Oven Dried Bellpepper Crisps -Waffle cone tips filled with dark chocolate -Snacky Clusters (it's these bits of potato chips, corn chips, and pretzels rolled in a ball and covered in chocolate) -Mee-Krob (Dried Thai Rice Noodles in bite sized chunks) -Strawberry lemonade flavored Oreos -Maple Leaf Cookies (the amount of maple in these things could kill a young Canadian, I think)

[@MollyBlueDawn]

Going down the checklist: Yep Yep Not yet - I must strengthen my aura until I find it Yep Not for me Not for me Disgusting beyond belief; not allowed in my universe Yep I provide my father with these Yep Yep Yep

[@mahalat84]

Omg yes. I've eaten the hibiscus flowers, but only at the appropriate time in my Moon Cycle. I purchased the chocolate covered powerberries for my father and they went uneaten.

[@Groundedsquirrel]

Great, now I want some, and the TJs is walking distance. Sadly our TJs is positioned over a hellmouth, so you’d be elbowed and trampled to death before you could find all these things.

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

The best thing (and I can't find it now) was some fried mochi nuggets snack that had a savory dusting on it. The crunch and taste was fantastic. I will buy an entire case the next time I see them. Edit 9/3/24 OMG they had them in stock again!!! Also tried the smaller mochi bits in the red bag and they're good too.

[@MollyBlueDawn]

@@user-wr3vt8uq4s The disappearance of favorite Trader Joe's items is a well known phenomenon, but now I have to wonder whether they have only transcended to another dimension where I can no longer perceive them!

[@MatchaTheVibeking]

"Im 127 hours into the sizzurp. GET ME OUTTA HERE" Is something I would expect to hear on Dracula flow, not actual stand up comedy 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@ruthhook1234]

oh fun fact some of their salmon (like the novo smoked salmon) is from chilean farms that have to use such high amounts of antibiotics due to the fish lice problem that the salmon itself pretty much functions like amoxicillin due to bioaccumulation

[@LuizaUtsch]

victory!

[@kitbracadabra]

the salmon jerky is the one and only bad thing that i have ever had at TJs LOL

[@cecilyerker]

This should be an advertisement for Trader Joe’s

[@fernbreeze723]

how do u know it isnt

[@tigralon]

The best part is how amused he is by everything he's saying 😄 It's somehow so charming

[@jessn.2665]

Every time I see or go into a Trader Joe’s, I think of you.

[@valeriepark9444]

The pure artistry of not tripping over the mic cord

[@RCGstah]

This is one of the most creative bits Ive seen in awhile---Im convinced Chris Fleming is a Bob's Burgers/Adventure time character that has come to life.

[@MollyBlueDawn]

I've never even watched either of those shows, but I just had a powerful vision of Cartoon Chris

[@pbjmochi8400]

He would make a FANTASTIC guest star on Bob's Burgers. He wouldn't be able to guest star on Adventure Time proper, since it's technically over, but I'm sure he'll fit right into the world in a spinoff, like Fionna and Cake.

[@chelseabighetty4722]

There is no one funnier. Period. 😂 And that vocabulary!

[@fermented_cabbage7268]

i hang in the ceiling rafters of tjs watching people, using a fishing pole to acquire a bag of dried baby bananas every hour. and nobody notices because nobody thinks to look up........in a grocery store

[@Groundedsquirrel]

Those freekin baby bananas

[@andrewbarrett1537]

It's comments like these that make digging through the comments worthwhile.

[@adissentingopinion848]

Now I'm just imagining an entire comedy special about Whole Foods

[@norse1585]

"he can come to the coven" is a great gender version of "hes invited to the cookout" thing black people say about cool white people

[@tjenadonn6158]

Unfortunately as a trans woman I still don't feel welcome in the coven. Maybe cis women are Diannic Wiccans while us trans folk are chaos magicians.

[@sarahcoletti6946]

​@@tjenadonn6158I'm a cis woman and my arms are wide open to offer you in! 💖

[@lwilso9152]

@tjenadonn6158 Well, I watched two transwomen make out at a party where the goal was to destroy a watermelon in the most creative way possible. There was archery, a chainsaw, an axe, and throwing cards involved. The host was a gay man living with his partner. I’m a cis white woman with an art degree married to an Indian man. If you’re not welcome at the coven, you can come to the watermelon party.

[@kagitsune]

​@@tjenadonn6158 We gotta get you to better parties girl, come hang out with us 🥰

[@MollyBlueDawn]

@@tjenadonn6158 There are better covens. Maybe the noticeboard at your local Trader Joes's is where to find them...

[@aliengeo]

"every AFAB" Chris plenty of us are perimeter donkeys or men staring at the corn chips too 😭

[@hpinkjet]

yeah that bothered me too lol thank you for pointing that out

[@revangerang]

That's why we're falling to the floor, they help us see the un-seeable! lol

[@BubblegumGorgon]

Right? I got snagged on that too- it seemed so out of place. The way people use agab to be demeaning & just rephrase a binary is already exhausting, it doesn't seem hard to avoid using afab and women as synonyms when they aren't :/

[@cameronschyuder9034]

@@BubblegumGorgonI think it’s supposed to be inclusive of AFAB nonbinary ppl* that have similar-ish experiences with girlhood/womanhood even if they are not technically girls/women. Trans men unfortunately are invisible as always aha *at least, there are a select number that do resonate with that. Reminds me of how some nonbinary ppl consider themselves sapphic even tho that’s typically thought of as a WLW term

[@galaxyvictoriano9999]

​@@cameronschyuder9034 100% agree, and as a transman this didnt bother me at all (in fact i cried laughing), though i understand why it might bother some. i was (and am) sort of forcibly living as a woman due to the perceptions of those around me, so i do identify with the experience of being a woman. much like chris i am on the circumference and invited to the coven, so i bear witness to all the secret womanly goings on, im just not a woman. also 100% agree that trans men are extremely invisible. seeing what has happened with transwomen getting mainstream attention, im not sure i want that to change. it sure would be nice to be recognized by the rest of the queer community more often without risking the focused ire of the transphobes.

[@andrea.mojarro]

I was there and I missed so much of this from laughing so hard 😂

[@princicat]

showed this to my own tj employee (you can buy them at auctions) and watched them laugh their ass off

[@sunflowerglo1771]

This was the most accurate depiction of what it's like to be a woman that I've ever seen😂

[@gothmfsalem]

this man's glasses reach into other dimensions, and his tank tops reach down through the roots of the universe to grasp at jokes nobody else dares to make

[@glovester]

best comedian for the past 8 years ever since Gale waters-waters enter the fray

[@lavendarcrash2941]

My salads haven't been the same since she stopped selling her croutons.

[@cousinmajin]

Have you guys heard of the chickpea salad in a can? I'm obsessed with it. It's always on the bottom shelf in the canned section. Found out about it at a pool party from a girl friend. Not even joking.

[@mahalat84]

I literally just had this for dinner. Delightful

[@turankhan2381]

Yes very physical jester-like comedy. Honestly a blast to the classic, I'd say! ;)

[@DDD2323-z5i]

This is absolutely genius. I'm so glad this video was recommended to me. I was captivated the whole time and now I'm about to go binge every set you have on KZbin lol

[@a.e.3984]

As a guy who was also AFAB I'm scared of what would happen to me in there

[@ZijnShayatanica]

The results seem to be mixed from the comments I've read. I managed to walk into a TJ's & find plentiful snacks while my cis BF entered a fugue state. I feel like a powerful being. 😂🤣

[@sophie2000ish]

The universality of his hyperspecific scenarios and metaphors astounds. Where have you been, Christopher? What have you seen?

[@CodeNameX001]

Turns out Omega Mart was inside us the entire time

[@EmiliusReturns]

I didn’t even click on it yet and I was like “Sure. That seems like a Chris Fleming topic. Totally on board already.”

[@faceyl]

Cant even find something to comment, much like a transformative art piece Chris work is too magical to touch

[@vandinomyte]

the multidimensional arrival rant had me crying, so stupidly funny

[@quadlazer]

6:03 Now I know I was in the same Cirque du Soleil audience with Chris in 1992, sitting under the Grand Chapiteau next to the Santa Monica Pier, listening to Kumbalawe and thinking “Saltimbanco has changed the game.”

[@MollyBlueDawn]

*High Five across the decades and miles from under the blue and yellow big top in San Francisco on that same tour*

[@glomgotmisselhammer8081]

i came looking for a comment like this bc i was thinking i was crazy for wondering “was he singing Cirque Du Soleil’s Kumbalawe from Saltimbanco” lmaooooo. good ear 👏🏼

[@glomgotmisselhammer8081]

i saw it when i was a kid in south texas in the 2000s!

[@ZarilloKi]

Thank you so much for posting this comment! I was going crazy trying to remember where I'd heard this song. 😅

[@elleinvestigates]

Idk how the algorithm got me here but I was literally crying laughing.

[@jonnj9701]

Chris come back to Seattle. I'm sorry I awkwardly greeted you outside the Neptune when you were coming back with boba tea. I promise I didn't think both of them were for you I was just stunned by your aura

[@sashie253]

I was at that show! Both of the boba's were for him💯

[@redofthewolves]

I love this story. I'm going to think about it next time I'm at the Neptune

[@bonsairobo]

Lol the part about "foremothers" was the best

[@GrimFemme]

my favorite performing creature

[@MacDemarcosCigarette]

This is my first introduction to Chris Fleming and I’m very pleased and almost brought to tears. A prophet.

[@MedicFromTF2_REAL]

Idk why but specifically "127 hours in the sizzurp" really got me lol

[@KitKat_293]

i consider chris the foremost expert on trader joe's. there's none around me so only he can save me

[@cookiesyruplover]

It's so specific that I can't help but be mesmerized. I want a lady to remove the burdening snacks within my soul, when will it be my turn?

[@josipmartincic2488]

'Isadora Duncaning' is an excellent phrase.

[@vs470]

As an AFAB who isn't a woman, somehow I find my inclusion in this sketch more intriguing than hurtful, as if the TJ Snack Sense is biological which makes it even more mysterious for some reason?!!

[@a.e.3984]

I mean, it could be biological but transfem inclusive if it was affected by hormone levels. We need more research about this

[@RobHutten]

This was so damned brilliant. A lot of great comics working right now but not many that hit at this level.

[@ShuffleboardJerk]

I don't understand 90% of Chris' standup jokes, yet they somehow are always so funny to me.

[@Groundedsquirrel]

This is the first time for me, As I watched I was thinking it SHOULD be funny to me…. Now reading the comments I get that it’s brilliant

[@NatashaDuPrez]

chris is so real for that subtitle *evil man laughing* even though I am a woman with the exact same laugh

[@jessiemccarthy3705]

Thumbnail had me thinking that this would be an interpretive dance, and it was

[@aithjawcraig9876]

Thank you for shedding light on the female esoteric secrets of Trader Joe's Chris

[@mmesanaa]

Thank you for the laughs Chris. I have not been able to laugh much since the Genocide in Gaza started, but this gave me a short break. Also #FREEPALESTINE ❤🇵🇸

[@silentluvr]

TJ Crew here and this feels uncomfortably familiar. This is my therapist recounting one off handed tangent too many at a dinner party he doesn't realise I'm attending. I feel like I just butt dialed my deceased mother and got her voicemail.

[@Karebear9001]

Excellent work guarding the circumference my dear.

[@fellowworkero7]

I think I had just about given up on standup until the YT algorithm just served me this. Genuinely some of the funniest and well executed standup I have seen in ages.

[@abbymuse]

Women Bring Their ancestors To Trader Joe’s We can see the ghosts of our elders between the glossy packaging My grandma eating only a small bite of the cake at a time grew up during Great Depression My mother not letting herself eat donuts I saw her weigh herself when I was little When I touch each bag of chips that excites me When I grab each box of cereal that I want I dream that all our daughters Grow up in a world where food is simply fun

[@jesusmvr1]

Idk who this is. But thanks to my fore mothers and unborn, un conceived child, I have been guided to my new favorite bit of comedy.