THE TOXIC TRUTH: THE REALITY OF OVER-SENSITIVE FAMILY MEMBERS

Let's be honest. Most people can become offended and hold a grude for a long time.
It's a human thing. And I'm guilty too!
But EASILY offended people -- especially in a toxic family -- are difficult to share this life with because any and everything you say or do may offend them.
How are you going to be yourself, live your own life, and feel some kind of freedom when you have to share space with someone who may become offended by you?
It can be very challenging to share space with family members like this.
In this live chat, I discuss a common factor in toxic family dynamics that can lead to years of family estrangement.
----------------------------------------------------------------
#trauma #tamarahilllpc #TOXICFAMILY
----------------------------------------------------------------
DISCUSSED IN THIS CHAT:
0:00 intro
3:22 being easily offended is sometimes a socio-cultural concept
6:23 complex emotional state ("what did I do wrong?")
7:25 some research says gender could be an issue
14:51 enmeshment within the family can complicate things
17:06 WHAT IS GOING WRONG WITH EASILY OFFENDED PEOPLE
24:00 SKIP TECH ISSUES
25:02 WHAT CAUSES THESE PEOPLE TO BE THIS WAY
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Mentioned In The Video:
1. The psychology of offense www.sagu.edu/thoughthub/the-p...
2. Zander W. Kränkung aus tiefenpsychologischer Sicht ["Taking offense" as seen in depth-psychology (author's transl)]. Psychother Med Psychol (Stuttg). 1976 Jan;26(1):1-9. German. PMID: 940915.
3. Feeling Offended: A Blow to Our Image and Our Social Relationships
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
4. You’re offended, I’m offended! An empirical study of the proclivity to be offended and what it says about employees’ attitudes and behaviors
www.sciencedirect.com/science...
5. People who are easily offended are bad employees, research finds
www.humanresourcesonline.net/...
RESEARCH: www.homepages.se.edu/cvonberge...
----------------------------------------------------
----------------
SUBSCRIBE for more videos: 👩‍💻
/ tamarahtherapist
*New videos Wednesday, Friday and/or Sunday, EST.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Music:
----------------------------------
🎵 Track Info:
Epidemic Sound
-----------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:
*Videos are provided for exploration and educational purposes only and does not constitute clinical suggestions or consultation for individual cases.
If you or someone you know is having a medical emergency involving harm to self, please reach out to the suicide prevention hotline suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.
----------------------------------------------------------------
----Contact me-------(BUSINESS INQUIRIES ONLY)
I'm Támara, a licensed and internationally/Board certified trauma mental health therapist, with over 14 years experience. I specialize in helping children, teens, and families with mental illness. I also treat psychological/emotional trauma in children, teens, and adults.
If you'd like to contact me or inquire about my international consultations, you may email me at [e-mail]. *Please note: all consultations are charged a fixed rate fee based on the case content.
Mail me stuff!
PO BOX 15747
Robinson Township, PA 15244
*FOLLOW ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
Twitter - / therapisttee
Website - www.anchoredinknowledge.com
Instagram: thilltherap...
______________________________________
Copyright © All rights reserved.
Permission must be given before videos are used.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

KZbin will make the live chat box available for you to see after 12 hours. That's always the best part. 😀

[@truth4utoda]

My husband's family is so offended by everything. Don't say hello wrong or say goodbye wrong. You will be sorry 😢

[@nancykg6666]

Ha! Ha! Ha! We must be married in the same family! Sneeze the wrong way. It becomes the biggest felony ever! It might just land you in maximum security prison!😅

[@JKDVIPER]

Some of them blow off with all anger over the smallest thing. You should be sent to SIBERIA. 😂❤

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

🙈🙉🙊

[@deeelle697]

This was right on time. I just went on a trip w/ someone who wanted to yell & fight because she got UPSET that I would suggest she hydrate, dress for the weather/occasion, & use the restroom when one is available. ‘She didn’t need me telling her what to do’ but would complain nonstop about being cold, dehydrated, & refuse to use the restroom, then 20 min later complain about having to 💩 so bad she was going to 💩 outside. There was no talking to her because she would DARVO (learned this from the video lol).

[@MainHouse-kf3tb]

Knowing the name for what is happening to you in this type of situation makes it easier to navigate them in the future while keeping yourself whole. . . ❤ You are not alone. . .

[@truth4utoda]

Hypersensitivity is the problem in my family

[@TheRetroWoman80]

Another gem of a live, thanks Tamara. Sensitivity has so many grey areas but I am glad to know mine doesn't fall in this category you talked about tonight. I could not live with myself if I committed these extreme actions of hate and/or violence I hear about everyday. Thank goodness for the choice of self-reflection, introspection, mindfulness and quiet time to think about things.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome!! And thank you. After all the tech issues, we're good to go! And you said this very well, I agree: " I could not live with myself if I committed these extreme actions of hate and/or violence I hear about everyday."

[@Access2rome_Denied]

Hello, I just discovered your channel, i subscribed immediately! Thanks for your presence on KZbin! My toxic family gets easily offended when I speak and when I don't speak! Im convinced they aren't my real family due to the years of unfair treatment! I believe i was stolen from the hospital as a newborn! Take Care!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you!! I'm glad to have you on the channel and part of the discussion. You sound like you are in a no-win situation with these people. Once that becoms apparent, it is often best to look for ways to foster your peace of mind and put up boundaries. Someone's going to be offended and that's okay in the long-term because you can't please everyone. It took me a long time to understand that as a person and a professional.

[@Access2rome_Denied]

@TherapistTamaraHill I thank God for ppl like you, I asked God to protect and heal you in any ways you need, from things seen and unseen so that you can continue to bless others with your teaching! Take Care!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

💖💖thank you so much. And amen. I need this prayer.

[@ashanein]

My family of origin isn't dramatic but they use fear obligation and guilt a lot when they're offended. Passive aggression instead of blocking, dramatic stuff. It confused me so much growing up. You must be loyal to and so loving to the family or there's something wrong with you. My having difficult feelings (anger, fear, disappointment, hurt etc) or concerns that involve them offended them.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

This can be very imprisoning " You must be loyal to and so loving to the family or there's something wrong with you." I'm sorry you have had to deal with this. Setting boundaries is essential here, if you can.

[@ashanein]

@@TherapistTamaraHill thanks so much, Tamara 💜. I tried for a while. Went no contact a few months ago because they keep testing and crossing my boundaries. Death by a thousand paper cuts kind of thing. Thank you for all you do!! You are such a compassionate and knowledgeable person and professional. 💜

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

I totally understand. You needed to do what was healthy for you! And thank you fir this kind comment! 😇

[@user-tn8fu1gx3v]

This is my father. At 15 yrs old I offended him ....he told me never to speak to him again until I apologized. It lasted 3 months before my mother begged me crying to apologize because it was so awful living with him not speaking to me. I believe he fakes being offended so he can attack anyone....as long as its his wife and 3 children. Such a coward.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

There is definitely something to this. I'm sorry. A lot of people -- parents included -- do not know how to resolve conflict and often resort to stonewalling or refusal to talk, igoring the person, or having a very hard external shell that is hard to penetrate. Some might call this stubbornness.

[@user-tn8fu1gx3v]

Thankyou for sharing your knowledge. Its so nice to be validated between my therapy appointments.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome!

[@deeelle697]

and another thing 😂 the questions & chat box were on point or had me cracking up.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

I can certainly see why!🙈

[@deeelle697]

I appreciate your content, & your following. I got educated & had a few good laughs.

[@JKDVIPER]

I can’t believe I hadn’t subbed you 😢I meant too. I did. 😟🙏💯hopefully DOC isn’t one of those people. 😂❤kidding. 😛🤘🏼19:23 Ya, it’s interesting, these types can turn a conversation/situation where they have an issue at hand, regarding their life, not the narcissist. But the narcissist will turn the debate/talk into a referendum about THEM. 😂❤a chance opportunity to become THE TEACHER. 😎💡💯when they should be having empathy and LISTENING, not teaching with ego centered on looking superior. Usually the abuser person winds up needing to EXPLAIN EVERYTHING. Defensively. 😟💯🚫

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you for subscribing! Glad to have you on the channel. 😀

[@user-om2fe8wb4q]

Hello everyone!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Hello!! And welcome.

[@lsisak7651]

Love to catch the replay on a Friday night. Feels like home.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

🤗

[@zionrose007]

Thanks so much for this awesome podcast 🎉

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome!! Glad this was helpful. :) And thank you!

[@crazigrl85]

Yes…a lot of people do this think its hate issues. It is religion and political nonsense

[@johnwaller4983]

😊

[@queenbutterfly4888]

Or some family members call you overtly sensitive to not hold themselves accountable for their actions and backstabbing

[@zeppelinl6275]

I don't see comments yet she is reading them?

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You should be able to access them within 12 hours after this live chat ends. I really wish KZbin would change this!

[@joannefortune]

Hi goodnight what about a person who is always thinking that they right they always yelling at you you could never get your point across they want you to do everything they tell you to do and if you don't do what they tell you to do they get very very irritated they could see you out they tell you off And then when the dual get back to you they like nothing never happened they have a normal conversation again and they wanna go back to the same Old normal self until they start a cup again

[@MainHouse-kf3tb]

Look up emotional dysregulation. . .

[@user-om2fe8wb4q]

The comments are not available for dialogue.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Yes, they are! I will try to highlight where they are during the next live chat. You will be able to see everyone's comments tomorrow too.

[@Access2rome_Denied]

Im in need of your services... Hopefully I can spend 2 hour sessions a week! I Love your personality, you're so awesome ❤!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you so much!! And welcome to the channel.

[@Access2rome_Denied]

@TherapistTamaraHill you're welcome... you helped me heal today a little more, I learned that the different family situations that I've encountered actually have names and definitions attached to them! Lol It's like a weight lifted off me the more I watched & got more understanding! Can I ask you a question? Who do you go to for healing when you need it? because you healing so many people! Thanks Again. Take Care!