THE TRUTH ABOUT MEN AND VULNERABILITY: WHAT MEN SAY ABOUT BEING VULNERABLE

[@DrKimSage]

❤️Morning! Please know that I know, that for some people, this video won't be relatable, because you already do a great job of receiving another person's vulnerability - male or female! However, I think that when we have more challenging childhoods, it can be truly scary to face our own vulnerabilities, as much as someone else's. This is just what I have heard from my own sons, and many men in therapy, and no matter what - I believe we all deserve to be EQUALLY heard, to be loved, to be safe and to be mentally well. ❤️.

[@Plasmafox]

The very fact that even a professional can't discuss men's mental health without a disclaimer that it's not political says everything TBH Just the idea that maybe men aren't simply defective deeply threatens a power structure that is entrenched in our society.

[@adrianhayton9883]

Thank you so much for this video. ❤🌟🥰💔💪✨

[@glendasolis8676]

I love your message ❤️❤️❤️

[@peterreed736]

I've been vulnerable with anyone and at 58 years old I see no reason to chafe now. Not even my wife has seen me to be vulnerable or open up and she never will. I know this frustrates her but she's now accepted it.

[@charlesstanford1310]

I often think of the movie _Ordinary People_ and how Dr. Berger gets Conrad to yell and break down in sobs, and is there to hear it, to take it, to hold him, to give him that space to get it out in ways that are - there's no other word for it - *ugly.* Heterosexual relationships need certain things in order to persist, and the biggest thing that women need from their male sexual partners is safety. Most women who get married to a man are not able to give their men the kind of attention that a therapist gives a client, because they can't confront the totality of a man's inner emotional world and feel the safety with him that she needs to find him attractive. So stop expecting them to. Stop expecting a marriage to be a relationship of ultimate intimacy. Encourage men to find confidantes with whom they can open up their emotional vulnerabilities - _with other men._ If they do this, they can give their wives the safety they need. The man's emotional needs are better met and the marriage is more stable: it's a win-win situation.

[@wavy6470]

Although I see your point, I don't agree with your perspective. A woman needs to be a safe place for a man too. This is what I'm doing in my relationship and we are both helping each other heal our wounds. I will always support him in his vulnerability with me, because I love him and care for him deeply.

[@charlesstanford1310]

@@wavy6470 If you've achieved that, glory to you. You're one of the rare ones, especially if it doesn't cost you tremendous effort.

[@DG-ky4qk]

@@wavy6470 I predict you will leave your man at some point because of this.

[@MrLooktotheeast]

The problem your addressing in this video is actually millions of years old. The male gender has evolved to be the providers and protecters of women and children. A man who prioritizes his own physical, emotional and psychological health is not a very good protecter or provider. He's not useful to the tribe. This kind of mentally may of helped humans survive on the African Savannah, but we don't live in the stone age anymore. Why can't men talk about their problems? It's because we are still expected to conform to stone age male gender roles.

[@Plasmafox]

We do talk about our problems and instead of listening people blame our gender for those problems.

[@shanamartin3197]

That part that you said at the end was really just so helpful to me! I now have a wonderful man in my life that I have done the work to establish a trusting relationship with. While I was and am still glad that he feels safe enough with me to be vulnerable, when he explicitly said that he felt that with me a short while ago, I freaked out a little bit on the inside. After doing some self analysis I realized that it was most likely because I have historically been a bit uncomfortable with my own vulnerability. I ended up at your video as a part of a research path that I'm doing personally to help myself become more aware and comfortable with my own vulnerability so that we can continue to deepen our relationship and I can continue to show up for him the way I would like to and the way that he needs! I would be grateful if you have any books or materials you recommend on the subject!

[@lifestoryguy]

As a man who writes poetry and probably has a deeper emotional range than some women, I've come to the conclusion that as I am the one that has to initiate the first date and lead the romantic relationship, it's my responsibility to choose to date women who can deal with a man with strong emotions. So, if I see or hear a woman shame a man for having emotions, then I'd never date her because, to me, she has an ugly soul. It also indicates she could have a range of personality and attachment issues.