College Figures Out How To Discriminate Now That Affirmative Action Is Banned

[@TheBabylonBee]

What would you put in your college application personal essay?

[@stonesonfire]

I'm a happily married theocratic stoic constitutionalist...... I am the weakest link! Hello!

[@markfry4304]

Grammar. And acting skills.

[@TheNewsInASL]

I would put that I am a black, gay, female immigrant. I know of someone who got a job based on those "qualifications," so getting into a college by "identifying" with those qualifications should be easy. Harvard, here I come! By this time next month, I will be referred to as "Dr The News in ASL!" I shouldn't have to take all those classes to get an advanced degree!

[@lesterstone8595]

I would mention my up-coming gender affirming surgery, which is my name for circumcision. 🧐

[@kingofthorns203]

I just wrote Black Lives Matter 10,000 times.

[@Elerad]

Stay strong, Aiden.

[@discostu5426]

LOL

[@kingofthorns203]

Omg that reveal at the end!

[@messengeroftruth17]

And Laquan.

[@ChristmasEve777]

Schools better admit anyone named Kayleigh and reject anyone name Shinaynay because their names might not match.

[@bradleymyers5030]

Wink 😉

[@mikeg3439]

The sad thing about Babylon Bee is while they did not change their approach at all, they went from being a satire website, to basically a documentary series that gives incredibly realistic re-enactments of real life.

[@roginutah]

My (ex)employer did similar stuff. Eliminated all the obvious discriminatory things but kept in the part that said they didn't need to give a reason.

[@pradhyudh]

Yep,they went from mr.bean to David Attenborough

[@mariposa9506]

​@@pradhyudh😂underrated comment

[@SRose-vp6ew]

An extremely woke local “establishment“ that trains future doctors was affected by this court ruling and while they still encourage their racist book studies filled with their racist secular humanist evolution beliefs spoken as facts they just changed the HR hire web page pop up (It’s like a flash page) from saying, “actively seeking racial and sexual minorities and will first hire minorities and women over equally qualified white males“ to just the main page that says, “positions available.” You don’t have to be white to see that went beyond pandering into actual, a white male should have sued, racism. This ruling saved their butts but the kind of crazy racist that think like this still need to be fired from being in positions of hiring people if they’re going to do it based on skin color or if they ever thought that was okay. In all honesty if you got rejected from a racist place that said something like that it’s not too late to sue, you’re not suing because you didn’t get over it, you’re suing because someone needs to. Is it the fourth amendment of that went against?

[@SRose-vp6ew]

No white, black, or Asian should be hired/educated or not hired/educated based on the color of their skin. These places were already breaking the law by going against the constitution.

[@jimparkin2345]

It’s so hard to be racist when you’re not allowed to be racist.

[@billbazen9432]

Racist..Racist..Racist😂😂. Give it a rest already!

[@psygnosticrevenant6773]

@@billbazen9432 Racist. 😏

[@dianedeck]

Not only are they trying to be racist against their own race, but they are also racist to the potential black candidate because they think he can't make it in on his own merits so they must have to help the poor guy. Disgusting.

[@pedrofrigola5224]

Don't worry, the best and brightest at DEI departments across the nation are on the job!

[@outSAN1TY]

@@pedrofrigola5224 maybe the best, but bright will never describe them

[@hefireymilhim6151]

Man wasn’t prepared for the Aidan at the end I felt tears coming down stay strong Aidan.

[@dansmith7617]

As a university professor...this is spot on. You guys are amazing.

[@jberndt88]

So freaking happy my graduate school trained us to become more than professors. I would lose my mind. I would probably be canceled. Which I have been canceled in several areas by extremely toxic people.

[@ronaldkonkoma4356]

I sat on a scholarship board and I actually heard somebody say, he's so good that he will have other opportunities to help him. Let's give this one to . . .

[@buckhorncortez]

How can you possibly achieve equality unless you treat people unequally? That's the question they can't answer...

[@dangeroreilly2028]

They aren't striving for equality. They are going for equity.

[@catgamelover5335]

equality vs equity, which actually makes more sense

[@outSAN1TY]

@@catgamelover5335 might as well say socialism, because equity is the exact same.

[@ChristmasEve777]

Someone beat me to it. They want "equity" which means a completely different thing than equality. It basically means they can openly discriminate against white people and get away with it. Equality went out the window a long time ago.

[@talleywa5772]

​@@dangeroreilly2028They are failing.

[@rhaythe]

On the plus side Aiden, you won't graduate with $80 thousand in crippling student loan debt from your community college.

[@wheatandtares-xk4lp]

Yeah, hah! Only $30k... :(

[@linagreenlyfe6705]

And if you get a certification in welding, soldering, CNC machining/programing, data science, etc., you'll make more money than a Starbucks barista and her Queer Studies Degree

[@SeaJay_Oceans]

If Aiden was so smart, he'd know to join the Air Force, Army, Coast Guard, or hey - even SPACE FORCE now . . . and his G.I. Bill makes University FREE.

[@ckgarlisch]

Aiden's parents are loaded AND they decided to pay his college FOR him.

[@veganconservative1109]

@@wheatandtares-xk4lp Reason why I quit Community College back in the day. The cost was skyrocketing every year. It wasn't worth it anymore.

[@boilermaker1337]

This would be funny if it wasn't happening to real people.

[@jt-rex6972]

Exactly, anybody really think the Left is against doing something illegal? LOL! I guarantee you they are doing exactly what is in this skit, by looking into the essay and extracurricular activities to determine their race! Not to mention just looking at the name. Not that hard to figure out who's Asian, Hispanic,. and Black just by their name!

[@Hugh33337]

@@jt-rex6972 Also Twitter, TickToc, Facebook... If you're on any social media, you're screwed.

[@Soxruleyanksdrool]

​@@Hugh33337Most women on OnlyFans are screwed.....

[@lb5759]

Yep. You know many of them are doing exactly this. This is not satire. It should be labelled (based on true stories)

[@elephantdanceparty7917]

@@Soxruleyanksdrool Literally 😉

[@SandyBlJ]

This sketch is so realistic; it starts by being very funny, but it ends up being really painful.

[@francp3147]

So, a Mockumentary?

[@AJHyoton]

When it came to taking tests that would endear you to colleges, I marked my race as, "Other," and got a shit ton of elite universities trying to recruit me. Ivy League, Stanford, West Point, nearly all of them. The previous tests I had aced and listed no race at all, because I did not want to mark next to, "White," when all the other choices were, "something-American." I considered myself Romanian American, so I marked Other, and found it both hilarious and a bit tragic that everyone was beating down my door. This was back in the 90's.

[@oldfarthacks]

A very sensible idea. If your family has been in the country for a couple of hundred years as has mine, we all have quite the mix in our background. I myself identify as Norse American.

[@tashtastictash]

Everyone should click the other box. Ask stupid questions- get stupid answers ❤

[@dontcheckthisbox2753]

Damn I was too young and naive to do that. Instead I truthfully marked the most cursed box - Asian.

[@BozesanVlad]

Proud of you not letting yourself in US race madness. It is like some of them only this have in mind even if all people are mixed in one way or another.

[@calvincoolidge1207]

Choose Hispanic. I had a roommate that is half-Mexican and he had very light skin. Nobody will question you because that would make the racism obvious. If you are questioned, say you are mixed.

[@randydiabolo]

I am not even kidding, I work at a university and right after the AA thing dropped in the news our president sent out a letter to the entire university that said basically "Don't worry... we have ways to work around this..."

[@TheWilferch]

Publish it.... publicly.....

[@whitezombie10]

Give it to the news, the world has to know

[@iasimov5960]

@@whitezombie10 The news? Do you mean main stream media? HAW HAW HAW!

[@MrCamaleon7]

Document it and send it to James O'keef.

[@AdeleiTeillana]

​@@whitezombie10😂 Why? You think the "world" cares about affirmative action in America? Plus anyone who knows anything about academia already knows this, which means that the news channels already know this and don't care enough to publish it or make a video about it. I'm a law student at Columbia and they basically said the same thing. They've even kept us updated throughout the year on the best ways to go about it. Currently, their brilliant idea is to increase recruitment from the community around us (NYC) because it has a diverse population, so they'll naturally be able to admit a racially diverse group of students by upping their admissions of locals.

[@claudeculver4076]

My son was sent a notification saying he was eligible for a scholarship in Colorado but as soon as they found out he wasn't black it was rescinded . But instead of him crying Racist , he went into a job training program to become an electrician, getting paid to learn .

[@johnnyjohnson1326]

Happened to my brother in the early 90s.. Kansas basketball scholarship

[@nuria.l-l-9827]

He got the better deal

[@caravanlifenz]

Frankly, he'll probably have a better life as an electrician instead of accumulating thousands in debt for a degree and then working as an unpaid intern. The university did him a favour. I met a guy a few weeks ago who ditched his desk-bound degree job to become an electrician.

[@victorstiles8946]

Yes because he had the money and resources to pursue something else. Whereas a black person might not have had the ability to do that. You just explained why affirmative action is good 😊

[@rickraber1249]

AND as an electrician, he'll come out with probably very little student debt, AND a higher wage than the gender studies major with $100K in student loans, zero job prospects, AND.... a brain the size of a pea. Oh, and plus he'll know he's a guy.

[@SkyEcho751]

I love the fact that the entire reason they missed out on the potential candidates they 'want' is because they were extremely racist.

[@johntabler349]

👍

[@lennypearl]

White? I mean, right? 😜

[@davidjohnson5527]

i do believe this was the subtle point babylon bee was trying to convey so props to you for picking up on it!

[@johntabler349]

@@davidjohnson5527 as subtle as a sledgehammer to the head

[@HurricaneMiltonsDad]

@@davidjohnson5527 The force is strong in this one, eh.

[@freedomrulesjavier3904]

Getting rejected by the UC system to go to a State University and becoming an aerospace engineer was the best thing that happened to my kid.

[@epikgamer4462]

Isn’t the UC system race blind? I respect the cope

[@jberndt88]

These universities really are not putting out people with real skills anymore. In my career it’s something new every day that is offensive to them. The broom dust pan could be yellow and they go online and find nonsense to back up why yellow dust pans are offensive to one eskimo in Africa. Then HR freaks out and spends $1000 replacing all the brooms.

[@jacklaker1939]

@@epikgamer4462yeah affirmative action is illegal in California

[@DimitriTheBarbarian]

@@epikgamer4462 score blind

[@joemama114]

Aiden, one of the most emotional attachments I've had to a character in a LONG TIME. I feel for the guy, he's doing his best, fighting hard for his dreams, clearly wants to make his mom proud, has a wealth of potential, is scholarly and wise WELL beyond his years. Yet, there is a stern stoic pain, in the acknoledgement that even with the overwhelming merit of his achievements, he may never find the recongnition he strives for. HEARTBREAKING is an understatement. Soundtrack dosen't hurt either, subtle sad piano *chef's kiss*

[@carloszarzoso1724]

Now you know how white ppl feel it's even harder for Asians to get in because they set the bar to high for Asians.

[@Devil_Around_Midnight]

Yeah retars that is exactly what happens to white ppl. Did you miss the video, they literally thought he was white so they didnt allow him in. Black people get in with lower grades based on their extremist ties. AYDEN WAS THE STORY OF A WHITE KID

[@sachmo0196]

This happened to my daughter. She is white and her name is a 2 part Japanese word. She went to her interview (upper level) and the Interviewer (upon seeing her), said "you're not black!"...She said no, I'm white. The Interviewer was caught being "Racist" (she was black).

[@צביהשבט]

So sorry to hear that!💌

[@InteloPL]

Hope she's doing fine. Have had similar stories a few times. Manh don't realise how racist they are while pretendending to fight racism.

[@B7R8]

*Can anybody tell me why affirmative action was banned while Biden is in charge. ?* *It just doesn't make any sense...*

[@oldfarthacks]

A funny story. Many decades ago, in the 1970s a friend of mine was the manager at a company that serviced truck scales. One day, a government guy walked in and told him that he had to have a certain racial mix. That he had to have 3 blacks and 2 Hispanics. So he called in 2 of his black employees and 3 Hispanic while the government agent was there and told them that they were fired, that he was going to have to replace them with whites. The government agent got incensed and said, you can't do that, to which my friend replied, you just told me that I needed to do this. The agent did not know what to do at that point. My friend then demanded that the government goon leave. After he left, he then told the 5 guys what it was all about. They agreed that the whole civil rights thing was a joke. Then everyone went back to their work.

[@TheBoxster1998]

Some blacks are racists. They just hide it and then claim they’re oppressed and the victim. 😂😂😂

[@Andy_Holmes]

Now that antiwhitism is systemic in society, they can drop formalities like affirmative action.

[@nealorr5086]

I haven't seen it yet, but I am sure at some point soon, they'll start to say naming your kid Adam or Jennifer is "white supremacy", even if you're black of Native American.

[@Benny19097]

Great comment! and sad... 😢

[@KhorgosKhul]

Yeah racism sucks, especially when you're the target.....

[@crunchyman5330]

Modern-Feminist: "But white people still exist."

[@paulw5039]

Exactly. In a similar vein, they've tried to redefine the term 'racism' to only apply to privilege. So since they can be openly bigoted against white people, with no consequences, that means they have power and the privilege whites don't. Thus by the original definition (racially-based prejudice and discrimination), they're racist, but also by their weasel-definition, they are still racist.

[@stevenfeil7079]

Affirmative action has been destroying lives for decades. Decades ago the son of a family friend tested number 3 in a San Francisco fire department test. After affirmative action he was placed lower than 50.

[@Undisclosed86467]

And San Franciscans were safter for this brave decision 🤢

[@allnightfright619]

In 2001 I took the exam and scored a 90 and was told, as a white candidate, I should get at least a 96 or better to have a better chance of being looked at.

[@AndreyBassNotes]

@@allnightfright619 with today's "standards", if you were Asian, you needed to have gotten at least a 117% to have a better chance of being looked at XD

[@Wakeywhodat]

My dad was a cop in the 70s and got passed over twice for Sgt because he was white. He spent an additional 7 years as a homocide detective and dipped out with an early retirement. Went on to make bank as a peddler in the oil field.

[@michaelallen1396]

I know 2 guys with fire degrees, volunteered for years were told by the Captain there's nothing he could do to get them in because of this reverse racism.

[@christopherjollie8988]

The biggest lie I was told growing up is that I had to go to college. I didn’t, and you dont have to either.

[@worldslargestnerd]

Not only was I told that same lie, but my high school (like many) treated the trade school kids like unintelligent, second-class students not smart enough to go to college. I wanted to take extra ag classes like wood shop and welding my junior and senior years because I thought those things would be useful. Because I was on the "advanced" diploma my school refused. I had to take physics and precalculus instead. I became a journalist and have used neither in my life. Ever. Complete waste of time. Sure would be useful to know how to weld. Like my dad, a welder who just retired from the power company. A man who made more per hour than I'll ever see. The American education system is broken.

[@ChrisShupe]

Amen!

[@mordechai-]

What do you do for a living?

[@xeridea]

There was a time when college actually meant something. Now, there are tons of fields that require little to no college, some even pay for your training. Obviously certain fields, such as medical ones will always require college, but you don't need to go to an overpriced racist school to do so.

[@christopherjollie8988]

@@mordechai- I work at Goddard Space Flight Center as an Electromechanical Engineering Technician.

[@LL-th2hw]

That last scene really got to me. We live in such an upside down world. Just one of many issues that leave me scratching my head.

[@TEQSUN68]

*My parents were Italian Americans. Neither graduated high school. My Grandfather owned a hotdog stand in NYC. My dad made garbage bags in a factory for a living all his life.* They instilled in me the drive for academic excellence. I worked hard & graduated community college with a 3.9.GPA. I then applied to a prestigious nursing college for my B.S. When I was called in for the interview the woman was cordial until she realized I marked on the application I was Caucasian. She told me because I identify as white, I no longer meet the GPA qualification. She said it was extremely competitive among that demographic & required a perfect 4.0 score. I then asked her what the requirement GPA was for other ethnicities? She told me for Hispanics 3.6 & for African Americans 3.2. She then asked me if *I was sure I wasn't Hispanic?* I thanked her kindly for allowing me the chance to change it on the application. I do look like I'm Hispanic, my skin is olive, my hair is dark & so are my eyes, my last name even sounds like I could be. However, no Ma'am, I am Italian & the only option for Italians is Caucasian. I will not lie to get into your school or anyone elses. *My integrity is not for sale!*

[@seancrawford4134]

Before the middle 20th Century, Italians were not considered Caucasian or " white ". Seriously.

[@charginginprogresss]

> I then asked her what the requirement GPA was for other ethnicities? Should've asked "so you like hiring less competent people?" lol

[@rodmunch69]

Uh, Italians ARE black, haven't you ever heard of the Moors?

[@TEQSUN68]

@rodmunch69 I'm a third generation American. How far back do we have to go to say what we are! 🤬 Afirmative Action hurts many lower income Americans & promotes others. Universities & Medical schools should admit on a academic merrit base only. I am glad the Supreme Court finally shot it down.

[@rodmunch69]

@@TEQSUN68 haven't you ever heard of an octoroon? Democrats used to use that, and quadroon, all the time back in the day, and now they're bringing it back.

[@john6717]

No meme, I had this happen to me. I participate in something called "HARO" which is "help a reporter out." I saw a request that was in my field so I was excited to participate. At the end of the inquiry, it said "only people of color or women." Super racist.

[@rickraber1249]

Yeah, isn't that illegal? So you can say that if you're a journalist, but not if you're a restaurant owner?

[@larion2336]

Should of sued them for discrimination.

[@VelkePivo]

Pretty sure that’s illegal

[@sadwingsraging3044]

Sue them.

[@nschlaak]

Could this be a legitimate reason to identify as something that you are not?

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

We’ve got people in our political system who will call out and push back on virtually every single issue, except for rampant antiwhiteism in the West. You ever notice that? 🤔

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

If we don’t call this what it is, they will continue to rename and reimplement until the end of time

[@guillermoelnino]

They'll talk about antiw hitism too. They just won't do anything about it.

[@zacharybosley1935]

Anti-whiteism? Really? Is it anti-white to compensate for the economic consequences of the Jim Crow Economic Model?

[@scottinnh88]

I pray my two pre-teens don’t want to go college at all. Even west point has been destroyed.

[@smicksmookety]

It's cuz they shootin' fer "cosmic justice" as Sowell puts it - the whites have had the advantage, so now it's ok if the blacks have the advantage for a while - at least that's the theory behind cosmic justice.

[@ElusiveMasquerade]

Babylon Bee is no longer satire. They essentially showed us exactly what’s going on.

[@TheBestEverEverEver]

Hasn’t been satire for awhile now tbh

[@francp3147]

Yes, it's a MOCKUMENTARY.

[@reignman30]

It's like the Pitch Meeting channel. People think it's comedy, but no, that's exactly how the pitch meetings have to look these days for anything to make sense. How the F did they green light this movie? It's super easy, barely an inconvenience.

[@janedoe5229]

I had a black friend who worked at at hospital. He told me that he didn't like affirmative action because everyone figured that he was hired because of his skin color, and therefore they assumed he didn't know what he was doing.

[@mfsebcw]

Thats on the racists, not him. AA and DEI never reduced the qualifications required.

[@Crash_Clips_]

@@mfsebcwthey have

[@jberndt88]

Hospitals still like to hire minorities because they are easy to exploit. Its the age old sociopathic mindset of exploiting people by making it look like you are doing good deeds.

[@jberndt88]

Look at all the minorities Walden University exploited. If a hospital is that exploitative they only hire minorities, worse those on visas, you dodged a nightmare.

[@dinoblacklane1640]

It's gotten to the point that I think this about every non-white, non-male now. And well I'm usually right

[@seth7745]

I served in the military and worked my arse off in a community college to transfer to UW with a high GPA to a competitive major. It was sickening feeling when a kid right next to me with a low GPA that had not even met the transfer requirements was being admitted along with me in place of others that worked as hard as me. Its disgusting. Minority privilege is real and not justified. The reasons I had to go in the military to begin with is because I was white, poor without a father which makes it impossible to get financial aid. They demanded my fathers income information and I could not give it to them. I didn’t know the guy. The system is broken on many levels. Yes, low income people get the shaft but it has nothing to do with race. They use race as a diversion to not address the real issues.

[@dougsmith9779]

well said sir

[@aprilthomas1489]

Oof. I feel that. Especially the father issue. I did know my father and he was rich. But he did not do anything for me and would not support my education. Still I had to include him in my application and therefore did not qualify for any financial aid. I quit after the first 2 semesters because I was literally starving to death.

[@Dead_Goat]

Umm poor single mother is free university for white kids. it is part of the welfare we give.

[@johnchestnut5340]

Sadly, race is now an issue...once again. But hopefully it is only temporary. It's not even true racism. It's emotional. It's not a belief, it's an actual hatred of American culture associated with a predominantly white population. Technically not racism. It's cultural.

[@Savag3B0ii]

They were like your white you have to know your father…that is racist on so many levels.😂

[@patrickobrien8060]

My daughter had a college acquaintance from South Africa who applied at a medical school. When he arrived for the interview, the med. school was angry with him for not being Black.

[@dinoblacklane1640]

Literally telling an African " I don't like you because you don't look black enough"

[@cheesynacho4real]

@@dinoblacklane1640 oh there are a lot of white south africans btw

[@danielgant2214]

There’s a lot more truth in these BB videos than most actual videos. That’s how ridiculous the country has gotten. The best people should get the spots, regardless of any other factor.

[@rickraber1249]

No kidding. Do you really want a guy with a crap education from a bad highschool who gets into med school because of his skin color - to then be your brain surgeon? Or your airline pilot? And please, I'm not being racist. I happen to be Mrs. Rick, and I once got a job as an operator in a refinery because of my gender - back when there were only two.

[@caravanlifenz]

The US needs to sort its shit out fast. The crazy antics in the US are empowering the woke nutcases in NZ and Australia. The 'Young New Zealander of the Year' award for 2023 went to a trans Fijian who achieved absolutely nothing; he received the award for being a trans who encourages violence against real women. The madness started after the US allowed 'Lia' Thomas to swim in women's competitions.

[@danielgant2214]

@@rickraber1249 there are still only 2 genders, everything else is just playing make believe. I chose not to play their game. And I don’t care what name they pick for me, their opinion of me is irrelevant and has no impact on me whatsoever. Have a great day.

[@DarlingDaintyfoot]

​@@rickraber1249Or your submarine pilot to be some 25 year old instead of some white 50 year old ex navy submarine pilot...... Too soon?

[@rickraber1249]

@@DarlingDaintyfoot Well, here's the thing. Whether it's brain surgery or a burger joint meal, you want the person to be at least well trained or in some cases, the best of the best. I saw another article yesterday about some nitwit that used to be the head of the Civil Air Patrol who's saying they need pilots of "diversity" rather than "middle aged white guys". I guess he thinks skin color or ethnicity is going to make you better at your job. And here we all thought it was training and skill. Look at the difference in brain power between Dr. Carson and Dr. Fauci. And how about that, the former is black and the latter is white. Now tell me skin color means more than training and basic intelligence, no matter which skin color we're talking about.

[@xxGothrd]

I was approved for Yale and a bunch of other colleges after I got out of high school. I too had the highest grades highest GPA so many extracurricular activities the whole 9 yards and then some. My future was BRIGHT!!!!!🎉🎉🎉 Couldn't attend any university because my family was deported. The irony of life. I paid for their mistakes.😂😂😂😂 That's life... 😭💔

[@penelopepurr]

This problem needs to be removed. To do this, the people making these decisions must be removed.

[@rogerhuggettjr.7675]

If you stand up for equality in a real sense you are a partisan conservative with some hidden agenda. That's why real facts are never addressed. Just follow the proven methods for marginalizing those with opinions you can't reasonably address.

[@lancerevell5979]

Sadly, this crap happens far too often. 😡

[@benwest3223]

I love how Minesweeper is the perfect analogy for blindly selecting candidates with no available criteria.

[@ddodd69]

I was looking for this comment.

[@kevindrake4529]

It’s really easy for them to discriminate. (1.) Zip codes that are mostly black neighborhoods; (2.) extracurricular activities that are stereotypical; (3.) race revealed in essays either overtly or implied in stereotypical ways; (4.) photos of candidates

[@dudcom3739]

don't forget names, first or last both are always a pretty big giveaway about someone's ethnicity

[@kevindrake4529]

@@dudcom3739 social media postings too

[@kevindrake4529]

@@dudcom3739 true story: maybe 20 years ago now, a friend applied to a prestigious school and had some activities that someone in admissions saw and they assumed she was black. She played basketball, sang in a Baptist choir, and a few other things such as her last name being something like Jones and her first name being something common for young black ladies her age. The school made the assumption and invited her to interview for basically a full ride scholarship. They flew her out for a weekend…and they were shocked when she showed up looking different from what they expected. They were very cold to her after that. They wanted diversity and she wasn’t it in person, but on paper she checked all their boxes. And that was 20 years ago.

[@JustChristianBlack]

@@kevindrake4529 yep, and if they saw aidan's photo they still wouldn't fly him out. Good grades, liking tennis AND lacrosse = he's "not black enough" 🤷‍♀ They could have went a bit farther with this skit had they though about it.

[@kairon5249]

photos of candidates also allows them to subconsciously judge based off looks (or consciously), but then again that does actually affect how qualified the applicant is, as everyone judges everyone subconsciously based on looks.

[@kylearpe7168]

FINALLY! I had no idea how to play mine sweepers

[@muxion]

Over 50 years ago a friend answered the race question on a scholarship application by writing “human”. He found out that he would receive a full scholarship, until… they found out he was Jewish. Oops, sorry, clerical error, no scholarship for you

[@richhertlein8878]

We now live in a society where truth and satire are indistinguishable. Keep up the good work!

[@matthewbosco5753]

do you not agree racisim exists

[@richhertlein8878]

@@matthewbosco5753 absolutely, but possibly not the kind you are thinking of

[@kingofthorns203]

I was expecting comedy, not surveillance footage

[@Serquss]

I can relate to Aiden. I play tennis, was in the lacrosse team, and black. The struggle is real y’all.

[@MrErikbaan]

"Without knowing the race, how am i supposed to know who is good and who is bad?" 😂😂😂

[@corynicolas3175]

"Rice try." That's hilarious!

[@Sgt_SealCluber]

Aidan will get a better education (potentially) and save a boatload of money going to 2 years of Community College first, they did him a favor!💀

[@marthaj67]

I love that you spelled the name Aidan correctly 🥰

[@oldfarthacks]

The politically correct schools limit their teacher searches to the correct people. This then at times has their selection pool at less than 6 percent of the population total, before then looking for someone in that 6% that has the educational background to teach the subject. So say you want a black female, that is 6% of the population. Now out of black females, how many are qualified to teach upper level math? 1 in 10,000 would not be an unreasonable guess. So let's do the numbers shall we. Population of the US = 360,000,000 * 0.06 =3,600,000 Still a good sized number. / 10,000 = 360 Now go for the top 10%, those that are truly able to properly teach the subject. That is 3 to 4 teachers, at best. Call it in reality 3. So then, given all the BIG schools, there are at the max 3 teachers who are capable of teaching at that level. Most likely, those 3 will have already been snapped up by some other place that is also trying to hit a diversity standard. The upshot, most of the teachers in the Big schools are substandard. Go to a CC that is not trying as hard to hit the politically correct insanity and get better teachers.

[@raisagorbachov]

I watched somebody going through applications to be their work assistant. Nope - that name sounds too *insert race* Nope - that person is *insert gender* Nope - that person lives too far away Nope - that person lives too close They did employ somebody of their chosen gender, race and location who *apparently* turned out to be a druggie'! Shortest hire ever. They got rid of them before they'd even started the job. I witnessed a lot of that sexism/racism and was apalled.

[@raisagorbachov]

@@AdamFontenet-iy3tb Bit late - that's 10+ years ago and that company is long gone.

[@ch3cksund3ad]

I find it odd on job applications they ask you about disabilities, race, sex, etc., then claim you wont be judged on that. Funny I've sent out hundred of applications, for things I am perfectly skilled for, most being entry level positions, or like just a step up and gotten almost no calls back, but tons of declines.....

[@HoneyButter_Biscuit]

Everyone should do what my mom did once. For race she put human and sex she put yes.

[@kimgilson7903]

Yeah and they can't ask your age but...what year did you graduate?

[@natalievu4399]

Wouldn't even answer those questions. How dare they?

[@charginginprogresss]

@@HoneyButter_Biscuit > For race she put human And that would be correct because ethnicity does not equal to race There's only one race for homo sapiens sapiens. And it's humanity.

[@daniwanicki]

I experienced the same, I got more interviews when I didn't list my race, but when they discovered I'm white they say I'm "not qualified" enough for an entry level job. In other words not black enough. Thought it was just my area but seems to be pretty common.

[@shane5896]

This is currently happening in every university across America.

[@RevMikeBlack]

Very powerful ending. Thanks for the reminder.

[@kaufmanat1]

Given equal opportunity, you'll always have unequal outcomes. When you spend your time as a society "giving free stuff" to those who underperform, and punishing those who are successful, don't be surprised when your society fails.

[@quantumac]

I feel bad for real-life kids like Aden. But, you know, their great accomplishments are just too "white-adjacent" or something. These days it's not fair to judge people by the content of their character. That's so yesterday. It's much more fair to judge them by things they can't change, like skin color... /s

[@briant7265]

Aiden is what a LOT of Asian kids have experienced.

[@boboboy8189]

Chinese also love aiden names, its funny that people think its antiwhite in comment section but hiasan and rajesh also didnt get into this

[@DaybreakPT]

​@@boboboy8189 It IS antiwhite because most people getting rejected over race in the US are white, with the whole being 60% of the population and all...

[@dinoblacklane1640]

I mean that's the world now. You can't judge a woman based upon her weight, something she can change. But you can judge a man based on his height. Something he can't change. We valve looks over character more now

[@SgtGigawattz]

This *could* be funny if it didn't feel so accurate to reality...

[@r5t6y7u8]

This *is* reality now.

[@tylerahlstrom4553]

This literally happened to someone I know with the last name of Lee. He showed up to school after being given a scholarship and they were surprised he was white.

[@trellises]

This is far too good! I wouldn't be surprised if it's actually happening.

[@GuiltyFaT]

It is

[@incurableromantic4006]

If *only* there were some way of sorting students by an objective, measurable criteria. Something that would approximately show their aptitude for academic study. . . . . . .

[@goldilocks913]

Oh that’s just white supremacy 😂

[@scottwood1143]

Hmm…

[@dannyarcher6370]

A headscratcher, indeed...

[@AllAmericanGuyExpert]

I'm stumped. Maybe have them all study the same material and then see who drinks water like a dog? I know I'm getting close.

[@Name-nz4kt]

If only... I'm sure all these diversity hires will figure something out..

[@ChandlerJuliet]

Thanks for having me and putting me up to saying all those things!!!

[@arinerm1331]

You really are a treasure, Chandler. I enjoy your channel!

[@Laughy-Flaaffy]

Reminds me of “Woke vs racist” skit where the duo have everything in common

[@briant7265]

That was pure gold!

[@randombsgo4367]

both in unison "I think everything should be seen through the lens of r@c3!"

[@dalebaker9533]

Affirmative Action Still exists when it comes to jobs. Affirmative Action is the only systemic racism I found in America.

[@haberdasher999]

Great video Babylon bee. Thanks for sharing

[@Felground]

That last part hit me hard. You got this Aidan!

[@kenstone3688]

Too hard. I thought this stuff was suppose to be funny...

[@AT-oj7of]

@nunyabidnezz703Nope, because the admissions offices actually do really despise those groups. Too white adjacent.

[@kronosbot5]

Truly exceptional people have never let themselves be stopped by fools' attempts to do what's right out of ignorance or stupidity.

[@rickraber1249]

Please add arrogance and bigotry to your list.

[@yvette3636]

This video was hilarious. As a black female who grew up with a poor single mom. I went in the military to get the GI bill to afford college to become a RN. In the 90’s GI bill was $300 a month. I never received anything to help me in school. I was the only black person in my nursing class. I racked up 45k in student loans and 22 years after I have graduated I’m still paying them back. I opened my own business a few years back and was denied funding. I had to get a car loan and use the money along with credit cards to fund my business. Once business was dissolved I had to use my retirement money to pay off the debt. I’m not complaining I’m glad to be a Nurse living my dream. But AA has never helped me in any way as an adult. Everything I have, I have had to pay for it and or work my way through it. Which I should. Just wanted people to know that some of us never have seen a benefit of AA, that I’m aware of that have made things easier.

[@elleburney5158]

I agree that many women and minorities have not benefitted from AA. But I appreciate this thread because I was not aware of how many white people have been denied because they aren't a minority.

[@oldfarthacks]

Now here is the kicker, you had a chance for those programs to help you and lost the lottery. A white women would have had strikes against her that you did not have and a white male would not have even had a seat at the table. I am sorry that it did not work out for you, but you are to be praised for the good job that you did, congratulations.

[@MichaelMattison-ko9mk]

I wish I had been as smart and driven as you in my earlier years

[@yvette3636]

@@MichaelMattison-ko9mk never too late

[@dstorm7752]

Didn't Johns Hopkins mandate an essay explaing how race and gender influenced the applicant? So the affirmative action game will roll on....

[@Fr.Savage_McKiligan]

I knew it was coming, but that ending.😂 It's almost like making blanket judgements based on broad stereotypes instead of judging a person individually, by their merit, is a bad thing.

[@robboyte1101]

The sad part is this will probably be exactly what they'll do in the near future.

[@A_Random_Person27]

I was once told by a university selection committee that I had the perfect qualifications for the position, but their quota of white men was full and they were required to choose a minority or female.

[@oldfarthacks]

This is why the Big schools are staffed with teachers that are less than the best, they are subprime. When the math department had meetings on political correctness in action, you know that the school is junk.

[@anthonyharmon9265]

And yet its accepted....imagine them telling that to a black or latino

[@A_Random_Person27]

@@AdamFontenet-iy3tb I will not stop posting to raise awareness about this.

[@A_Random_Person27]

@@mustbetrue1602 Hahaha I didn't even think of that! Would've opened a lot of doors for me LOL

[@A_Random_Person27]

@jakeshields2905 Do you assume everyone is a liar?

[@cianmoriarty7345]

Absolutely nothing should legally allowed to be used for university admissions except things like SATs.

[@maxbennett5412]

My father specifically warned me that if a college tried to admit me based on race, gender, or something other than merit I should refuse.

[@rodmunch69]

Having a dad = white privilege.

[@Youchickenquestionmark.]

Now it actually is an equal opportunity for all

[@timtomten5285]

2 generations opertunitys stoledn but who cares about the white man

[@zamar2158]

No, there is already a work around in colleges and corporations. The woke refuse to stop their racist practices or beliefs.

[@ryonbrowning5514]

"Good grades in every class except drivers ed......." Gold, pure gold.......

[@misfit2022]

“Without knowing their race how are we supposed to know who is good and who is bad” 🤣 but also 😱

[@neuxell]

I've literally been claiming to be a disabled black woman on all my job applications lol. Can't risk discriminative action

[@mycarispassat]

This should be shown in schools.. and discussed.!!

[@zoebaggins90]

Critical thinking and discussion are not allowed in schools today.

[@oldfarthacks]

I agree, but we all know that incorrect political thought is not permitted in the Big schools, or for that matter any school now of days. The goal is to shape the minds of the children into the correct thoughts. I hear that Harvard is working on that 1984 model dictionary as we type.

[@beakt]

I fell out of my chair at, "Hey, Mom. It's Aiden." Brilliant ending. You guys are so clever.

[@lewislopez8610]

The wokeness keeps on growing And its certainly not showing Any signs of slowing

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

*antiwhiteism

[@mikeonthecomputer]

@@CoolPapaJMagik that's a synonym.

[@kingofthorns203]

I read this in Gene Wilder’s voice ❤

[@charles_0017]

It's self destructive at its core. An ideology based on indoctrination and destruction cannot last. Why do you think more and more videos like these on the internet are appearing? Wokeism can be traced back to the start of the 2010s, with movements like BLM.

[@CoolPapaJMagik]

@@mikeonthecomputer “wokeness” does not wake people up to the fact that we’re being victimized

[@cashwalk7253]

They do it through the scholarships now. 😅

[@rasta77-x7o]

Nothing says inclusivity like excluding others.

[@meomy29]

Schools have already come out saying they'll find another way to "maintain diversity".

[@TheWilferch]

Publish those internal memos to staff......

[@mariadelamain2520]

Facts!! They need to stop judging people But especially judging them on what is seen rather than unseen.

[@hoppyandhisholidayhelpers1714]

how to start your admissions essay: "It was never easy for me. I was born a poor Black child."

[@randombsgo4367]

"and as im writing this essay I realized im also trans!"

[@nyssia7]

100% acceptance rate

[@hoppyandhisholidayhelpers1714]

"I remember the days, sitting on the porch with my family, singing and dancing down in Mississippi."

[@redschannel6527]

"It's so hard being a single mother of three, especially when I'm a teenage male with no children"

[@rohitkothari3890]

Lol. Good ones

[@thefiqster]

Tapping on his throat simulating auto tunes while harmonizing “Shawtyyy” Comedy gold.

[@Ekaterina_Anufrieva]

The only Babylon Bee video that almost made me cry. So sad and silly

[@maxcactus7]

The Bee is simply no longer parody. They've crossed over into straight up fact delivery, cleverly disguised as parody comedy.

[@JohnShalamskas]

That's why the NPC leftists often are fooled into thinking the articles are real.

[@bobjacobson858]

They'll end up presenting the "new" better than most of the news media!

[@johnteets2921]

I remember reading an article published by The National Association of Scholars that had figures that showed that the group least proportionally represented in colleges was whites. Should I have the actual article ? and its' sources ? Why ? Is America a place where facts matter anymore ?

[@onliwankannoli]

I hope BB will give us updates in this bright young man’s journey against liberal oppressors. Be strong Aidan!!!

[@plantfeeder6677]

Why? He doesn't exist? This is a comedy skit not real life. Please seek help. Propaganda works on both sides of the aisle

[@onliwankannoli]

@@plantfeeder6677 You see, when a person enjoys a “comedy skit” as you call it, oftentimes they like to play along with the joke. This is sometimes referred to as “having a sense of humor.” By my comment I mean to indicate to both the Babylon Bee and its viewers that I appreciate said “comedy skit,” and would like to see more of it, continuing the intriguing (yet admittedly fictional) story of young Aidan. Please feel free to add any other comments, or questions you may have about the nature of comedy, satire, or humor. Thank you!

[@oldfarthacks]

You know, that could be a fun series. The whole subject is wide open and would make a very powerful driving tool for the Bee and truth.

[@kjoy2215]

Wow that twist at the end!!!! 😂

[@thood1699]

Prayers for Aiden.

[@TheDPoint4]

Babylon bee is the best Type of bee 😂

[@michaelsterling2650]

I wanted to laugh but ended up just being incredibly sad at the end of the video.

[@iluvtheblues]

I was just talking to a colleague about this very topic the other day in regards to business hiring. What ever happened to hiring the best person for the job, regardless of sex, race, gender, etc. Isn't that the ultimate in abolishing racism?

[@machupikachu1085]

government grants and quotas?

[@kairon5249]

i think the problem is that class division is being masked by race. Blacks tend to be poorer than whites, which contributes to them being less qualified on average, but the same thing is true for poor whites. The solution here is to give the poor a leg up, but instead we are giving blacks a leg up, which gives rich black people an easy time and fucks over poorw hites.

[@kansasblues]

Aiden, we are with you!

[@tomchristian9932]

Lawsuit time!

[@DatBoi69420]

Huh so you mean to tell me when people see through the lens of race they’re racist? Who would’ve thought

[@wstavis3135]

"Shawn King, he's my cousin..." 😂😂😂💀💀💀 How could you say something so controversial yet so brave? 🤣🤣

[@houseofhas9355]

This just in. Colleges will now use GPA to discrminate against students. After trying all the way to discrminate they have returned to a proven classic. 👍

[@outSAN1TY]

Merit over skin, sounds reasonable for people that could potentially be running the country at some point.

[@harryballsacky]

SHOOT FOR 1.2

[@JohnShalamskas]

But the system is still gamed by the rich and famous paying for their offspring to get special consideration.

[@Arassar]

Wow, that bit with Aiden at the end kind of got me bummed out. Well played, Babylon Bee.

[@Stoic_optimist_realist]

Exactly why some schools, Ivy League, have lost creditability with employers.

[@D1nk13]

Lol.. This is so savage.. 😂😂😂 Aww.. Poor Aiden..

[@JohnAnderson-fj2rl]

How about showing empathy towards the people who are actually hurt by this. It's not the ones with Aiden's skin color who are the real victims of these types of practices.

[@up4playin21]

Take heart, Aiden. You would have left school with purple hair and a useless diploma by the time those professors would have finished with you.

[@davyp2993]

You don't know how lucky you are, Aiden. Life is good.!

[@MaxxSea]

that ending made me sad because it was personal. I should change my name to Laquan Lebron and get a tan.

[@Aquila-sz8pl]

Such a perfect observation of the lunacy we are being forced to live.

[@fivebrosstopmos]

"Except driver's ed." 😂

[@MtnBoar]

Wong way so sorry

[@brianpainter6620]

I love your real life documentaries! I sure miss your satire skits though...