Halo 5: Guardians (Zero Punctuation)

[@RoyalFusilier]

"Is Master Chief a traitor????????" "no" [end credits]

[@titis4life1]

Fusilier😂😂😂😂😂

[@bloodraven432]

I found it funny how the trailers constantly talked about how it was going to be Blue Team vs. Team Osiris and then you find out that it's simply Osiris just constantly running after Blue Team shouting 'Stop right there criminal scum!' and Chief running off to follow his dreams. Literally, they had only one fight with each other and that was just a cut scene.

[@inorite4553]

+bloodraven432 I wouldn't call that a fight. I'd call that getting pushed to the ground at the playground and then running after the guy who just took your lunch money....and calling him "sir" when you catch up to him.

[@KillerOrca]

+Inorite Yeah well after you get bitch-whipped by Chief I THINK thats the proper response.

[@inorite4553]

+Orcaman15 It's not proper protocol for an officer (Commander Locke) to address an enlisted (Master Chief Petty Officer 117) as "sir." Though taking into consideration Chief being the greatest hero humanity has ever known and almost single handedly being responsible for saving the lives of billions and ending a war that was on the very of extinguishing all humanity.....I can see how he let that slip.

[@KillerOrca]

Inorite That, and Locke himself has personal reasons...he did say to Buck "you're not the only one here because of him". Considering that Locke is from Jerico VII, which fell despite Spartan-II intervention...

[@GenericUsername-qp1ww]

+bloodraven432 the only reason Locke is after MC is cuz MC violated his mother.

[@Nikke-nn5mn]

you forgot the new and innovative gameplay feature of aiming down sights. never seen that in a fps before

[@thedarkness6256]

+MortifiedDumplin No, it'snot CoD or BO3 yet, it's getting there...sadly.

[@TheInstaShark]

+damiano de titta You obviously don't know the meaning of the word "sarcasm".

[@NaughtyGhost777]

+Nikke 2800 Except the way they implemented sights is completely unconventional for an fps game. I for one thought it was interesting design.

[@rodney2x48]

+MortifiedDumplin Dual wielding was pretty useless, so who cares?

[@UnrealOG137]

Why the HELL does every shooter have aim down sights. Halo 5 just added in some Cod features that NO ONE ASKED FOR.

[@Nirwanda001]

Here on the enlightened year of 2019 we can only wish micropayments were only $3.95.

[@michaelfranke8622]

$100 for BLUE!

[@pickledparsleyparty]

Laughs in 2022

[@Nirwanda001]

@@pickledparsleyparty Get your nfts here!

[@yoloninja4798]

posting after diablo immortal. oh how naive we were

[@allenhernandez3350]

2023 here. We’re trying to build a Time Machine to return to the times when $3.95 was a micro payment but can’t sell enough butthole pictures on OnlyFans to get the necessary funding together

[@adiestone5099]

But how did his tears get on the outside of his helmet?!

[@SickeningMirror]

Condensation.

[@innerpeacesoundscape]

+Adie Stone It was an allegory about never seeing Master Chief's face, effectively making the helmet his true face.

[@berengerchristy6256]

+SickeningMirror That's not quite how condensation works, unless his tears quantum tunneled to the other side of his visor

[@Torguish]

+007kingifrit I don't think castrated slugs can think that far ahead.

[@nicoleboudreau2646]

+Adie Stone the same way subject delta's food get to the inside of his helmet.

[@Swordsman99k]

Spoilers: You only play as Chief for 3 missions out of 15, and play as an even-more boring character otherwise. Locke is the most dull thing I have seen in FPS in years. This is so bad, it makes Halo 4's campaign look good.

[@Swordsman99k]

+John Smith Hahaha I wish. Unfortunately, Nathan Fillion was his companion. They shelved Capt. Reynolds in favor of a boring character. Think about that.

[@loverofjesusMKII]

+Swordsman99k Exept Halo 4s story WAS good

[@Swordsman99k]

+loverofjesusMKII I didn't think it was amazing, but I didn't think it was bad either. However, it looks REALLY good now in comparison.

[@Suzerainty950]

+Swordsman99k Halo 4 had one of the best stories imo because he was slowly gaining what he lost, his humanity. Before he was just a machine that followed orders without question, but was forced to confront his own feelings for the first time after Cortana was slowly going away. But all of that was thrown out the window with this iteration of halo which is a massive disappointment to me.

[@thedarkness6256]

+Suzerain But can he be considered human now? Dr. Halsey refers to the spartans as humanities next step in evolution, and the chief went through a forced evolutionary acceleration so the composer couldn't kill him by the librarian..he is more than human now.

[@nicostein9875]

4:36 "If you keep chewing the bubblegum, maybe the flavor will eventually somehow come back." This is why we love you, Yahtzee.

[@MrOldMiguel]

"The fun need never stop, in the micropayment shop" Love that one.

[@LukeTheNotable]

The campaign is pretty short and terrible.

[@CarlosPacheco]

+Luke TheNotable (Halo Tips and Guides) worst of the series IMO.

[@MisterTipp]

But the multiplayer is fun and solid as hell

[@dodson43]

+MisterTipp yeah but not everybody plays multiplayer

[@CAMSLAYER13]

+MisterTipp But does that really warrant the premium price tag?

[@royalpain6338]

+Carlos Pacheco i think that award can go to halo 4 but halo 5 isnt far behind

[@VideoGameMantis]

I liked Reach, when you could actually play gamemodes such as firefight without having to pay up like 20 bucks.

[@usolanddescendantofnolanda2627]

Anyone else not really notice that this game came out? I saw almost no advertisements for the game, little coverage, and none of my friends have made a passing mention of it. Maybe Microsoft is ashamed of that T rating.

[@krystaldragon17]

"T rating" *box art used in video clearly says rated M* Um...

[@usolanddescendantofnolanda2627]

+krystaldragon17 ESRB gave it a T rating. you can check the Halo 5 website and ESRB site for the rating and reasoning.

[@Hobojo153]

+Usoland, Descendant of Noland and Destroyer of Sugar Anyone who owns an X1 knew. Since they took the liberty of making a whole new page with nothing but Halo 5 stuff on it, and plastering the others with Halo 5 anyway.

[@usolanddescendantofnolanda2627]

+Hobjo153 Not all of us own a XBone though.

[@Hobojo153]

Usoland, Descendant of Noland and Destroyer of Sugar But anyone who is going to buy Halo 5 does since that's all it's on. Also that was a sarcastic comment about how they plastered Halo 5 on everything.

[@Huvpalto]

The awkward situation when the show "RedvsBlue" is million times better written than the game franchise that inspired it and was an engine that was used in filming the machinima. Hell, after all that build up for "TEAM OSIRIS VS BLUE TEAM" the bitchslap fights between red and blue team seem more serious and believable. Not to mention the "freelancer" squad.

[@BoboMagroto26]

Still need to watch RvB again, been so long

[@JamesVermont]

Especially since Red vs Blue showed us what two (or more) super soldiers fighting each other could look like (Tex vs Meta/Wash, Freelancer conflict crashing the Mother of Invention, the highway fight, etc) and then Halo 5 put up the weakest fucking show with the Locke vs Chief fight. So boring! Red vs Blue has better characters, better writing and better action, at this point they should just let Burnie Burns and Miles Luna direct story and cutscenes for the next Halo game.

[@limlamflammyflam]

Alex Thomson

[@SomewhereinIngerland]

I really want rooster teeth to be put in charge of writing a halo game at some point, not necessarily a main series game but maybe just a side-story/spinoff like halo 3 ODST. Technically they already made a gamemode in the form of grifball, but I really wanna see burnie et al working on an actual campaign

[@chefrory6271]

Alex Thomson red vs blue is the only reason I look forward to a new halo game anymore and the only reason I play still play halo when I have nothing else to play or the games I want aren't out yet

[@tommasosimonini4469]

FUCKIN SAVAGE ! next reviews that need to be done for the sake of humanity : - CoD BO3 : please, it's just waiting to get fucked - Fallout 4 : will be fun, trust me

[@Radstad]

+Simonini Tommaso Undertale***

[@riquelme3764]

+Simonini Tommaso He just did Bo3

[@EmeraldRunner]

+dastuke Yahtzee said no review for Undertale since he doesn't want to spoil the game, but he did say it was one of the best writing of the year.

[@Hobojo153]

+dastuke Not going to happen since he wrote an Extra Punctuation on it, and even that it didn't want to do. Maybe next summer when he's scraping for retro games to fill time.

[@CanadianBaconPwnage]

+Simonini Tommaso He's going to destroy Fallout 4, and as much as I love that game (my second favorite of the year behind Ori and the Blind Forest), I can't wait to see how he tears Fallout 4 to shreds. I think Yahtzee has carved out a niche for himself as a reviewer that rip games apart and only gives a Recommend or Not Recommend rating, and is loved all the more for it.

[@thomashopkins5768]

"More innocents lost to the 70s TV presenter" I nearly cried hearing this it is amazing

[@TheGreatCalsby]

“The VR Monster” It’s been 7 years and we’re still waiting for that monster to show itself

[@AshXXMayftw]

Not to mention this game's story is pathetically short.

[@megamanx503]

+AshXXMayftw all halo 5 is is a fucking prologue to halo 6, there's a reason when i talk with friends i call it halo 6 - 1

[@sumomanify]

+megamanx503 6.1*

[@megamanx503]

sumomanify yeah, that works as well

[@TenCoNesnasiGoogl]

+AshXXMayftw Well, try it in 4 player coop on legendary. That was the most fun I had in Halo so far. And it took us some 20 hours to finish.

[@T24Dokiel]

+TenCoNesnasiGoogl I would actually like to... if it had splitscreen and didn't need 3 friends with an Xbone.

[@danielplainview2584]

Halo 5: Guardians of the Galaxy really wasn't all that great.

[@danielplainview2584]

Also, Call of Duty are on their 14th game. Yikes.

[@fortkavanagh]

+Daniel Plainview I agree with ya there, Halo 5: Guardians was a true disappointment!

[@bobcooper82]

+Daniel Plainview I. Drink. Your. MILKSHAKE!

[@jforeman540]

+Daniel Plainview I am Groot

[@XxRobloxPlayerxX1]

+klinton kavanagh (fortkavanagh) Okay, whateves for me personally, it lived up to the hype, my personal hype. And will probably be my game of the year.

[@connorforce01]

Remember Reach... the last good Halo.

[@KailReborn]

Amen to that.

[@connorforce01]

Ah, someone with intelligence, well met.

[@KailReborn]

Hello! Honestly Reach was the highest point of the series for me, loved every bit of it. I was willing to be patient with Halo 4, new devs and all, but 5 really went too far.

[@tostie3110]

The best art style and well thought out graphics of the Halo's.

[@TheGuardDuck]

Reach was definitely the best. The covenant weapons felt powerful again, like in Halo 1. After the mission where you get no weapons to start and use what you find, I grabbed a plasma pistol again in every following level! And the equipment was great. Dropping a healing bubble shield or turning invisible was great fun! I used to make up custom horde missions with infinite ammo, lives, and loadouts with the coolest alien tech (and jetpacks!), just to fight endlessly! I cane back from Destiny once and forgot how easy Destiny got once you leved up to the endgame gear. Classic Halo was HARD compared to Destiny!

[@CrescentGuard]

Actually, funny thing. Halo 5's story seems like it could've been something really good. Before you reach for the pitchforks, hear me out. Remove pretensions to the characters and strip it down to the basics. Old veteran war hero is on a mission and has a delusion/dream/vision/message that his partner and the closest thing he's come to love may be alive. Meanwhile, you have another group which is finding out that said love is completely off her rocker and is threatening to destroy the world they know and may be drawing the veteran into her web. So what you do is you wind up playing the actual heroes half the time (the newbies) and the bumbling accidental villain in the other half in something that isn't exactly in the ballpark of Spec Ops: The Line but is a short commute away. I think this could make an amazing story... unfortunately they decided to explore it through Chiefy Chef and Cortita in the time it takes for rice to cook.

[@MadDemon64]

$0.75 is a micropayment. What does $0.75 get you? a new outfit for your Mii Brawler in Super Smash Bros, a new outfit that obviously took a long time to create as it's not some lazy pallet swap or reskin of an existing costume, but a whole new one that is meant to tickle the fancies of the person who buys the skin. Nintendoes what Microshan't.

[@johani1717]

It's still a fucking microtransaction! It should've been in the game from the start Nintendo are just money-whores like basiaclly all developers these days, only difference is that their fans actually relaise it and don't close their eyes and shout "LALALA" and give shit to all the other companies and their fans. So shut up please

[@MadDemon64]

johan idving I take it you are vehemently opposed the the entire concept of DLC in all it's entirety?

[@hardwirecars]

+MadDemon64 we used to play for 2 hours for that unlock not work.

[@MadDemon64]

hardwirecars You still do. But this is now extra stuff released afterwards.

[@gamefan56]

+MadDemon64 Is still funny how many nintendo fanboys give franchises like Call of Duty shit for releasing the same game, when all Nintendo has done is releasing the same games for 20 years with a few changes and their fanboys will blindly accept it at the holy grail of gaming.

[@TARINunit9]

>I guess his superiors thought they were playing XCOM and wanted to level up some of their rookies This is actually LESS stupid than the real reason given to you in the game

[@TheKrigeron]

I feel Yahtzee has an infallible equation that produces witty metaphors. He's beeen doing this for oh so long but he still never repeats himself and never fails to entertain. Just... right on mate.

[@ianmccallum9818]

I bought it for the story. How silly of me. Games at this rate will eventually dull down to... "press any button to kill and there will be no story." "If you want story, read the book!" "Find out why you kill people online!" they'll fucking say say.

[@inorite4553]

+ian mccallum and that my friends, is AAA gaming for you today....It's shit.

[@Krebons1200]

+Inorite Meh, better than the 1980's when rescuing a princess was considered an epic

[@LN.2233]

who buys halo for story?

[@Chronographed]

+TheGrandRevo That's a bit of a gross generalization isn't it?

[@SakuraAvalon]

+Krebons1200 When was that considered an epic? Back then, the story tended to be ignored for the gameplay and visuals.

[@zackhype]

2:22 I recognize all four of those characters. Goddamnit...

[@atruemanofculture1521]

I see you are a man of culture

[@zackhype]

@@atruemanofculture1521 I legit cannot recall who any of those characters are now lol. I think the middle two are vocaloids, obvs the one on the left of the middle is Miku. But the two on the outside I think are from Highschool Of The Dead.

[@atruemanofculture1521]

@@zackhype I think one of them is ,but not the blonde

[@Mernom]

The left one is from Nisekoi, I think, no clue of the others.

[@Veolynn13]

the two in the middle are league of legends characters -_-

[@guardingdark2860]

"TWATFACE lvl like a billion" Pretty sure you just summed up the entire FPS genre in one sentence.

[@tubz]

5:05 $3.95 microtransactions - little did he know there would be $20 skins in infinite

[@brettnovelli416]

It's funny cuz Escapist (their website) gave this game a 4.5/5

[@paradoxacres1063]

Do a ZP of *HuniePop* next, Yahtzee. Totally not a Spunk-Gargle-Weewee game. Totally.

[@Hobojo153]

+Paradox Acres Well it is, but in a different way.

[@swsephy]

+Paradox Acres HuniePop is best game.

[@Lt_Voss]

+Hobjo153 Almost quite literally, in fact.

[@meninja1]

+Paradox Acres You're... you're fucking everywhere with this HuniPop game. Stop following me!

[@slambangaction]

+Paradox Acres Never heard of it. Is it any good?

[@StriderOwO]

The microtransactions and the lack of co-op made me put this game down and never touch it again.

[@Sameji]

Halo 5: Beating a Dead Horse

[@zukiair3760]

Ha ha 69 drug number ha ha /s

[@connortobin7398]

One of the things that annoyed me more than the story was the fact that they removed the fucking local multiplayer. The previous games were okay but the fun part was playing it split screen with friends

[@sailoritaly]

2:23 Nice Nisekoi cameo there, Yahtzee ;3

[@smeg2973]

+Sailor Italy More like he simply googled "anime sex pillows" and picked a random result. Yahtzee would never watch shit like that.

[@sailoritaly]

smeg I know, I'm just pointing that out

[@generico366]

+smeg How would you know that?

[@smeg2973]

Bas van de Kleut Yahtzee, elite esthete that he is, unironicly watching some silly teenager wish fulfillment cartoon? Having trouble picturing that.

[@generico366]

+smeg What if he watched it ironically?

[@MVP_MAGAZINE]

Oh cool being early to zero punctuation video is like being in a club with nice furniture but no ravers 😎

[@TheLordAizen]

I like the game. The campaign is weaker then past Halo's, but the gameplay is miles better and the multiplayer is amazing. Still need more time with it but it's good. I would at least try it through like gamefly or a friends house if you're cautious.

[@MonteCreations]

+Tylericous I would try it at a friend's house if they didn't take out the splitscreen. Though really any console multiplayer game that lacks split screen is a non starter for me. Online play has nothing on playing with your friends in the same room

[@TheRupertLitterbin]

This is exactly what I thought, it felt fluent, but the story wasn't as action packed as the original 3, I still have fun playing the game though...

[@Milkman69ner]

You're wrong. Good day sir

[@MonteCreations]

Ola Nordmann Ya i agree. Heck its why many keep their consoles in a living room rather than their bedrooms. Really if i want to play only online, i can just play on PC

[@dylanmckenna4760]

+MonteCreations Or y'know, cause they can't afford a decent PC to run the games. I got consoles originally to play with my older brother, but when he went to college, I kept getting them so I could play with my friends online because it was easier to do than go to somebody's house and we didn't have to share the screen.

[@Deus888]

2:13 Jools :D Nice Cannon Fodder reference.

[@JustinCage56]

Tfw Halo 5 came out 4 years ago. Time really flies, huh?

[@Rantandum]

I'm surprised he didn't even mention the fact that there's no split-screen. Multiplayer is a founding element to Halo's gameplay, but now only one person can play at a time? What a gip! Not to mention that a four-player co-op story was one of the main selling points and 343 Industries didn't even have the courtesy of telling everyone that you need three more Xbox One's, three more copies of the game, AND three more TV's just for playing through the main story with friends. Ugh.

[@Farscryer0]

I kind of prefer the final ending of Halo 3, in which the "hero of the land" is laid to rest (a la King Arthur style) upon a ruined spaceship in nowhere space. It completes the "pretentious myth" thematic cycle the series was driving into our skull and it also allows for the retirement of the character from a meta-narrative standpoint. Master Chief is benched permanently at the highest point of his glory and can now be revered by the nostalgia-lenses of the masses as "the game series that made their childhood's 'worth living'".

[@davidcagle9462]

I got so excited when I saw this. 2 of my favorite things together, thanks Yahtzee

[@Mjolknirn]

Halo: We put all the interesting story in some obscure books

[@Gipsy_Eureka]

So many new games coming out means so many more zero punctiations! I can't wait to see fallout 4, BO3 battlefront, need for speed, and rise of the tomb raider

[@ChristophBrinkmann]

Best part about this video - the people in the comments section trying to say that the story for the campaign and/or the characters is starting to drop in quality. No guys - you see, in order for one or both to drop, they have to have been good in the first place. And let's face it, a game staring Space Rambo's gonna have a few hurdles to jump for it to be good from the word go. And those hurdles aren't going to get any smaller 4 games later! And for anybody says "Well the story makes sense if you read the books", I'd recommend you read some books - in particular, any that teach you what self-awareness is. Then maybe after getting through a few dozen of those, you'll finally realize what the rest of us knew about this concept and you'll be rewarded with a piece of cake.

[@ChristophBrinkmann]

Nice try, thank you for playing.

[@FunkyDouch3000]

The story in the old Halos is actually solid. Only the 343i Halo games have poor stories. You didn't need the books to understand what was going on in the old Halos, however, they added some background lore. What do you think is bad about Halo's story?

[@thatoneonewhitelatinowhogo8320]

FunkyDouch3000 343 only had poor stories? Have you ever played halo 3?

[@danhair]

I love Yahtzee's reviews, I knew I didn't like story of the game at all and I couldn't think of all the reasons and Yahtzee throws them all out there. Thanks Yahtzee, thanks for bringing the fire house to cool off all the fan boys from their gaming wet dreams with some cold, rational reality.

[@fluffi28]

November brings on coldness, darkness and Christmas decoration. But all is passable when you get more Zero Punctuation because of it.

[@JordanSmith-yi3ji]

No new weapons? Wrong, there are a few. Weapons actually worth mentioning? No there arnt any.

[@wesreleases6346]

I'm glad I watched this on the toilet, because I crapped myself from laughing.

[@Droopah1]

Has Yahtzee actually played the original Halo trilogy? I know he's played 3, but in his review of 3 he said he hadn't played the other two and has no idea what was happening

[@sparkie1j]

Itd explain why he thinks the series is so shit.

[@iainrickwood2623]

@Jeremiah Sterrett and is remarkably short sighted, like his hypocrisy and inconsistent ragging on 1st person parkouring because he lacks the reactions and patience to get used to a 1st person jumping engine

[@xevpennman3517]

my aunt has the same problem she never played through halo ce so she gets everything confused and calls the story complicated

[@DeadnCold]

I find it rather amusing that the ad I got at the start of this vid was for Halo 5...

[@Cyan-hide]

The thing I find most insulting about this is that you can only know what’s going on if you read the expanded material. Comics, short films, novels, etc. So yeah, unless you were one of those hardcore fans who owns everything halo, you’ll have no idea what the fuck is happening

[@mincenchez5887]

Another thing is bungie literally described master chief as “some guy in armour that kicks alien ass” but when 343 was asked they went on about how he’s a big softie with a soft spot for cortana and his old teammates and all this other stuff. So they tried to make a story and have him speak more but the story’s not that good in the end anyway

[@prufan]

Bungie didn't understand the character they were in charge of, because chief has always been more than "just some guy", he's always had a heart and a dry sense of humour. read the Fall of Reach book(which came out before halo CE)for more proof. And halo 4 chief was exactly like his book counterpart and was well written.

[@PlagueJesterSky]

Here's hoping Fallout 4 is next!

[@sailoritaly]

+Sky27 Call of Duty: Blackops 3 is

[@PlagueJesterSky]

+Sailor Italy #ShooterSeason2015

[@andycokeski7744]

+Sky27 I hope he does Rise of The Tomb Raider just so we can hear him get all pissy about how they are rebooting the reboot.

[@behemoth9543]

+Sailor Italy Lets be honest who cares about CoD anymore, even less when theres Fallout 4.

[@technoghost2124]

Guys were forgetting Battlefront

[@JoshTruff]

The story for halo 1-3 was so epic. Now I can't even get myself to play for this one.

[@Mr_Wholegrain]

What I hate most about Halo 5's story is that it did literally nothing from where it left over at Halo 4. Halo 4's story was actually pretty good when you think about it - it mainly gave Chief some well needed character development, apart from him being some giant, armoured guy that shoots things. Halo 5 should have had Chief go off to find his humanity, after the Spartan II project took it away from him. Or the story should have been an actual conflict between Osiris and Blue Team. Halo 4's multiplayer was dreadful, and to me it seems 343i focussed too much on trying to fix that, which I'd say in Halo 5 they did well apart from those retarded microtransactions - and put too little effort into story. Pisses me off to see my favourite game franchise slowly die.

[@barthslung]

Halo 4 had a great story if you supplement it with the books. Stand alone it was garbage because it left so much unexplained. It was 2 missions and 15 minutes of cutscenes away from a great story. So I mostly agree with you

[@boebahdoejr8852]

He called this game back in his halo 3 review!!!

[@bagingo]

That Jimmy Saville reference 😂

[@unclesean4728]

Thank god that Zero Punctuation exists. I was having a really horrible day today and this might cheer me up.

[@matjacks100]

I appreciated the X-com joke.

[@NoNo-nz7iq]

2:22 MIKU/AHRI PILLOWS EXIST!!!!! I MUST GET ONE

[@RubberFacee]

Games are about making money, not about fun.

[@стрелок-ч7р]

such a stupid redundant comment

[@iquestioneverything3426]

+Homeless angry black man that comment is not stupid, its the truth (at least for ea and Microsoft)

[@стрелок-ч7р]

+nicko bagaskara the son of aquaman when will this "omg ea is evil" bandwagon end

[@iquestioneverything3426]

Homeless angry black man when every human on earth stop breathing

[@стрелок-ч7р]

+nicko bagaskara the son of aquaman help me get there then if that's what it takes

[@massdefect1]

I do like that they avoided the trope of the main character having some kind of dream/premonition that the player knows is real, and the main character has to spend the entire game trying to convince everyone no matter how trustworthy they've been up to that point.

[@benkohut3121]

As much as I love Halo, I need to agree.

[@matthintz9468]

The bit about the stain was freaking hilarious!

[@SameBasicRiff]

i really liked halo 5, thought it improved well over 4 which was also fun

[@jbizra]

Just my opinion, but I prefer earning my gear rather than hoping to get something decent from an RNG system. I also don't like playing as a lifeless hitman with no backstory for 75% of a ridiculously short campaign.

[@SameBasicRiff]

Allclayismein req's arnt part of campaign, but ya that no skill system sucks. and locke was awesome, you want lifeless master cheif is the embodiment of that. As a fan since halo 1 and someone who read the books, locke brings humanity to the Spartans in a very down to earth way since he was not taken as a child but lived a life. And as for length it took me about as long to beat as halo 4, the ending was great too, set it up real well, you could see it coming from a mile away, but it still leaves me intrigued for the next game, i think the hate it gets is from people who dont critically think about what halo is. I mean its not perfect and is certainly a little too cod-like. but i still think its a good next gen title.

[@KageGodo]

Halo Reach had more humanity from it's spartans than locke did. and don't even get me started on the nonsense of the story basically saying "everyone who helped make sure humanity survived this day should be either put in jail to rot or die by firing squad, preferabbly the later" if it was not for Halsey Spartans wouldn't even exist, what happened with her? basically "she's a villain to our ideals and should rot." and what do they do to make sure her ideals are put to bed? "lets make our own spartans! regardless of them being volunteers, it'll be nothing like halsey's research" and then halo 4 basically takes the one man who saved their butts and says "your too old, too weak, too slow, and not able to do half of what this one spartan has anymore, stay out of it and drink some tea or else" to which he replies "screw that, im a soldier fighting for your safety, i'm not going to just sit here whilst your best team gets itself pinned down every two seconds" and saves their butts from a darth vader clone. to which their response is "ok wise guy, we'll make a bettter team and make sure you know who the boss is" which is really stupid and paper thin a story.

[@ahobo]

as soon as you posted this, the halo 5 update came out

[@Jaximous]

"Nothing ruins an action scene more than players" *cough* Hotline Miami Series *cough*

[@etangbose4755]

Wym?

[@dansuduhast1051]

2:22 Ahri and Sona getting cosy

[@Go_Coup]

"If you keep chewing the bubble gum, maybe the flavor will eventually, some how, come back." - some brilliant writer

[@fastfredyischristian]

The first 40 seconds of this is the best explanation of the past 10 years in and future of gaming I've ever seen.

[@sonofangron2969]

Nice backstory about the spunk stain Yahtzee - mine was Lion King though... (lets face it - we've all at least subconsciously thought about diving into Nala's Hakuna Matata or have Scar, Simba or Mufasa put their Pride Rock in our Outlands) :D

[@LesPog]

+Fveldoh his name is rafiki you uncultured swine

[@dolphin8146]

Matt Rowzee Alas, I am but a dog under the painted primate, Rafiki.

[@sonofangron2969]

+Fveldoh To each their own I suppose...

[@You115Tuber]

4:56 by far the best part of this video lol

[@munem939]

I lost it at the Jimmy Saville joke!!! xD

[@bigbear5523]

wow my pillow was included in this video nice!

[@JustinMcBride21x]

While I know this is part of Yahtzee's shtick, the bit about Halo 5 not having any new weapons, vehicles or enemies is objectively wrong. I won't bother naming them but that took me out of the review.

[@fictionarch]

1:27 the best thing about this joke is that in an interview 343 admitted that they didn't think people would mind spartan lock being playable through most of the game because they didn't think master chief was the main character.

[@prufan]

"they didn't think master chief was the main character." Which is really bizarre, since they personally made Halo 4 and knew who the main character in the original trilogy was.

[@fictionarch]

@@prufan look up the video on the channel fact fiend if you're curious. He links his sources in the video.

[@Scooter_Alice]

I'm pretty confident that even my dumb ass could fix this game's story

[@Rathbaume]

Every time he says Mr chuffy I lose it again. i cant stop laughing because it's so true.

[@jaytonhawkins2872]

*Mediocre at worst is still better than most.* Yeah I pretty much agree with the review but at this point I'm so deeply immersed in the universe that any Halo content is enjoyable to me. Also I would like to point out that if anyone is interested in Arena Shooters that Halo 5 does a bloody fantastic job.

[@Lalle524]

2:22 best part of the episode. Sona and Ahri body pillows, it dosen't get much better than that.

[@TheGloryofCadia]

I think Halo was better when the Forerunners were just a mysterious dead um... fore running civilisation... who put mysterious structures with crappy health and safety laws all over the place... Now that they're an actual faction in a universe where you've still got the UNSC (which somehow not only survived the war, but then became the dominant power???) and the Covenant (who decides "not fighting humans is boring"), it really ruins any sort of story they could've made.

[@alexisauld7781]

I find it so ridiculous that they managed to not only wrap up a story in three games that should have taken two, but are still trying to beat all the life out of it that they can, like (foul image ahead) a guy trying to beat the last few drops of urine out of his you know what during a bathroom trip. XD

[@OckhamAsylum]

There are all manners of opinions about the original Halo trilogy, but one thing I'd like to think everyone can acknowledge is that Chief's story had a good stopping point. The war was won, the Flood were dead, the threat was exterminated, and there was no more need for a super-soldier. Sweet closure. And then suddenly Halo 4 started up and all of the stage actors who were undressing in the back spun around with shock as they were told to slap their outfits back on and get out there and improvise. That's what this new trilogy feels like to me, the play being forced to go on and the actors going "Erm, so, uh... yeah, about those Forerunners... They're alive! And, uh... the Covenant... are still kind of dicks because of reasons..."

[@hazardtg3008]

+OckhamAsylum ahhh u misinformed fool

[@Exaltedquagmire19462]

I never know what this guy is saying but i like his vids

[@chaotea2042]

"I dont want no-one telling me..." That's a double negative.

[@DemonNo667]

Remember when we were thinking 3.95$ for a micropayment is expensive? Those were the days...

[@JohnnyElRed]

2:22 Ahri x Sona is the best. God, I need a girlfriend.

[@Bobman-ml5qf]

I do admit John Locke wasn't as bad as I thought he was going to be. Want to see more of his character, guess I got to watch the TV show miniseries that was made to be watched before Halo 5. But I get why Chief was being hunted. Because in Halo 4, he disobeyed a direct order, and he gets punished for it. Stupid yes, but ok. Wished we had a back and forth fight in between Locke and Chief, like how it was in Halo 2, we get the 2 sides, but more conflict between the Spartan team and the Osirus team. Now for Cortana being the villain I am down with. If you seen the Legendary Ending, they show a new Halo ring, with Cortana humming a song that 343 Guilty Spark usually hums. So a lot of people are speculating, that 343 Guilty Spark brings back Cortana and is controlling her. Also at the end of Halo Wars 2, the Halo ring shown there is the same one in Halo 5 (in the Legendary Ending). So Halo 6, a new ring. Possibly 343 Guilty Spark with the Flood, maybe?

[@meandmyfriends999]

Some of these criticisms were innacurate but this made me laugh as a Halo fan. I played Halo 5 for a week and a half and haven't played since. Makes me sad honestly. I'm not even playing any of the other new games that came out, I'm grinding fucking Destiny for some reason. I'm dead inside

[@gooberboyxdd323]

After 2 years I now realize that one of the body pillows at 2:33 has Ahri X Sona on it, how riveting indeed.

[@ryantodd1480]

is every video him just hating on games... I LOVE IT!!!

[@stanley1698]

+Ryan Todd Mostly. He does like some games, there's a thread here somewhere about that.

[@weebtrashcat]

He likes silent hill 2 quite a lot

[@blackwaltz463]

+Ryan Todd he's a critic AND a comedian, so make people laught is part of the thing.

[@superluigi5225]

the game sucks

[@ryantodd1480]

+Jerry Dixon well I like it :)

[@buca117]

It's kinda amazing how few people give Halo credit for their stories. I mean, they aren't AMAZING, but they were all (up to 3) more than just a string of set pieces. In Halo 1, the sequence of events is pretty logical: 01) Ships on fire, abandon ship 02) Round up survivors to regroup and fight 03) Rescue Captain Keyes because he's the one in charge; find out about Halo 04) Search for the map room that shows where the control room is 05) Find the control room; Cortana finds out about Flood, sends chief to intercept greater threat 06) Arrive too late to intercept greater threat 07) Get key to activate Halo and destroy greater threat; find out your floating buddy is as evil as he sounded in the fucking Library 08) Devise plan to destroy Halo. Implement Step One: Obstruction 09) Implement Step Two: Get access codes to Pillar of Autumn from Keyes' skull 10) Implement Step Three: Blow the Autumn's generators and get the hell out of dodge Or, for lazy people: 01) WTF is this?! 02) Let's set this fucker off! 03) Actually, let's not... That seems like a bad idea. A solid progression of logical events tied together with better level design than we've seen in years. Until Halo ODST, the Halo franchise has always had (comparatively) great stories. How many CoD can say they have as coherent and logical plots as the above? Also, Halo 1-3 is one of the very few complete trilogies. Their stories actually tie together into their own coherent narrative. They aren't amazing, they're space operas. They're like Star Wars.

[@ThrottleKitty]

*stares blankly* Sorry, just trying to figure out why the xbox 1 even exists.

[@supereldinho]

+Throttle Because: $

[@SotheX]

*high five*

[@supereldinho]

SotheX ^_^ /

[@inorite4553]

+Throttle Kitty ........money

[@2013branth]

+Throttle Kitty You know what's funny, the Chief Director of Playstation said in a statement that no one at sony has any idea why the playstation outsells the other consoles combined. They've come up with a few theories, but all of those have proven inconclusive so far.

[@222rdh]

Still going to get the game and enjoy it.

[@antiparrot2483]

+Paultinent *gasp!*

[@tachikoma2940]

Those waifu pillows... so I take it that you watch anime? Didnt know that

[@ursarare9507]

As a big Undertale fan, I cant wait for you to tear it to pieces soon

[@shaunado7556]

Halo Fanboys will literally defend this crap game to the death

[@quirkyadventures1722]

hell yeah we will!!! halo lore is amazing!!!

[@halflifeger4179]

+QuirkyAdventures Halo lore is far to overrated. It's at best mediocre.

[@eoghan887]

+QuirkyAdventures found the fan boy

[@tbthegr81]

+Shaun Davies And people who doesn't fancy the franchise will not change their opinion creating a neverending circle of people who like the game telling others it's good and those people replying that the game is crap. So do you want to be a cog in the machine or a free-thinker? It's up to you.

[@WickedGuardian]

"The opinions of those who enjoy something are invalid because I don't like it!"

[@PolyPolygon]

2:23 dat chitoge pillow OP

[@throwachair4574]

Unlike this game, I enjoyed this video with my friend on one screen.

[@blackdahliagaming4696]

after the first 2 seconds of that little fist fight it looked to me that the two of them were aware that the others were watching from a distance and it all felt like master cheif and saprtan lock were two kids showing off their best wwe moves to all their class mates they exchange combos in fucking slow motion a couple time and might as well be stomping the ground for the sound effects then stare at eachother as if to say "oh ya well i can do this!"

[@bigsnootis3554]

60 gigs with microtransactions no thank you

[@angeldeb82]

So very funny with all the big imps overpowering small imps, and giant imps wearing crowns and chattering, and the Halo guy killing the king imps only for them to keep respawning! So funny! And I chuckled at some funny bits too! :D

[@Kethriss]

Story-wise Halo 5 fell flat on its fucking face. They had all this shit built up about Jul'Mdama and the Covenant Remnants, the discovery of the Janus Key which was completely forgotten about it seems, and the Arbiter and his followers. But 343 decided to throw all that out and do this shit with Cortana. Gameplay-wise Halo 5 is one of the most different. The thrusters and different Spartan abilities give more options to combat approach and more responses to situations. And the micro-transactions really aren't bad. Like, at all. I was impressed with the Req system and how little it impacted actual gameplay. It takes like 3 warzone matches to get enough points to buy a Silver pack which gets you 2 permanent unlocks and a bunch of single use cards. The Gold packs, okay yeah thats a lot longer to get enough points to get one for free but if you've actually played warzone you know how fast you can die and lose that big fancy weapon only to have the person that killed you pick it up, and the rarer they are, the less likely you are to use them, and the stronger they are, the longer it takes for you to get the level needed to actually use the card in that match. And any of the common/uncommon drops come so frequently that they're more useful as sell fodder to get another pack faster. All that and still the only things that come out of req packs that you can use outside of warzone are armor pieces and skins, so any ranked competitive play will still be balanced. The mirco transactions are also paying for map packs, so if having to suffer through having to grind a few matches to buy a pack while little jhonny can just buy 50 with his moms credit card means that little jhonny's mom is paying for my dlc, then i'm more than okay with that. The sum of it's parts are pretty shit but put together and all things considered, Halo 5 really isn't that bad (certainly not as bad as Halo 4). But again, the story is absolute shit and 343 should be ashamed.

[@KillerOrca]

+AarkTheDragon Agreed

[@napkin60]

+AarkTheDragon "Thrusters and abilities giving more options to approach combat"? I hate to be the twat who yells "Halo is a ripoff of Call of Duty" but, wow, Halo is kind of being a ripoff of Call of Duty

[@cypher160manny2]

+John Malkovich seeing as call of duty now has space battle ships id say it's even

[@Kethriss]

Cypher160 Halo: Combat Evolved released in '01 and Call of Duty released in '03 so they don't even have that going for them.

[@KillerOrca]

Otto Von Skidmark You can't really trust what Joe says anymore.

[@Swiftassassin9755]

Thanks to these videos, I know have a reason to smile/laugh :)