GIRLISHNESS || The Art of Diffusing Tension in Your Relationship || Fascinating Womanhood

[@RachealUnderGrace]

My husband hardly ever apologizes , but this morning he said “ will you just be quiet “ and instead of me reacting to him in a defensive way. I used the response “ Hey just because your handsome & good looking don’t mean you can speak to me that way Mr.” I had a tone that wasn’t defensive and would believe this man grab my hand and said “I’m sorry I was trying to listen to something “ ( he was watching t.v at the time.) 😊 I was pleasantly surprised that it worked. Thank you so much! I am learning at forty-nine & after 27 years of marriage. It’s never too late!

[@Mia-sd5it]

Beautiful 💕

[@churchill19708]

I tried this!! 💞💞😍 He took my " I know you are a bear but you don't have to growl!" So well. Thank you thank you thank you! You have taught me to be more emotionally intelligent and loving to my man! ❤

[@elysagarcia2239]

The man's reaction in Giant at 19:00 is so cute! The grumbles, the begrudging agreement while still having his back turned and not yet ready to let down his guard or pride. It reminds me of my teen brothers when I have little pep talks with them and they get embarrassed and give really minimal, monotone responses. But I know it makes them feel good because they end with "We should talk more often.", and they start inviting me to their jr high orchestra concerts.

[@manonvernon8646]

I love these extra-long videos, I could listen to you ladies for hours!

[@DixieandBob]

Manon Vernon - oh thank goodness! We were worried it was way too long! 🥰

[@manonvernon8646]

@@DixieandBob Not at all, it really helps that you took the time to add clips and explain - especially as Girlishness is a topic you really can't be brief on

[@churchill19708]

Please make a list on the description so I can come back to reference the video. Thank you! Love you both❤❤!

[@kkdidwhatable]

I used the "I am telling my mother on you"(my mom doesn't understand why men do things for other women and not her ..my father divorced her for being extremely mean) to my husband. He said good then Ill really have someone to argue with ...my 21 year old stepson was there and he thought it was the funniest thing he ever heard and it completely changed the mood in the house❤❤❤

[@beckyschauer7650]

Just finished reading the chapter on girlishness in the book and just watched this whole video… I suddenly realized both of my grandmothers were matters at this!! So many times my grandpa would say something in jest to grandma and then he’d look over at me and wink, as if to say “I can’t wait to hear her response to that!” And she’d say something like “Reid, you big lug! I just can’t believe you sometimes!” And then they would both smile at each other. I think I’ll take some time reminiscing and see what inspiration I get 😊

[@CherbearAnn]

I loved this so much! Thank you :-)

[@JustSonya78]

When something is heavy and I need help lifting, I will say: Is there anyone with some muscle that can help me? Whether I'm at home or work men come running. I make a point to say it in a girlish way and you can see the pure excitement when they are able to help me out.

[@DixieandBob]

Super Sonya - love that! So good! 🥰

[@MuseSunflower]

that's sweet, I love that one

[@akw82]

I am new to being a traditional wife. Society mainly pushes you to be strong and independent. I truly do appreciate this information.❤️ This is a priceless gem.

[@akw82]

Hello Ladies. I have to clarify what I previously wrote. I was so excited to have found this information that I didn't get my message out. This is information that I wish someone spoke with me about years ago. Being a feminist was pushed so much more then being feminine. Learning how to treat my husband, love my husband and appreciate him means the world to me. I am rather playful, but have become very comfortable with reacting out of anger. Thank you for your examples. Thank you for showing me how I can use my girlish ways to diffuse a tense situation. I see something as simple as pout verses a scowl can make a big difference.

[@WeAreStrongwithJesus]

Love how Dixie says treat others with thankfulness not just your husband, in that genuine way. I’m a new subscriber. I saw a KZbin video of a lady who was doing a book review on your books and each video she would read an excerpt and then talk about it. I became interested in the material, so I looked up the book to purchase and found that you two have a channel and you’re the daughter and granddaughter!!! Ahhh! So excited to get into this material. God bless you both!! Loving everything!

[@DixieandBob]

So happy to be found! Welcome!

[@MuseSunflower]

These are so cute. I am taking notes Something I have used when my man is pestering is "Hey I think Sumo is calling you!" (Sumo is one of our ferrets 🤣) Or another day he had been teaching me to play Uno. One day it was my turn to cook dinner... I sensed some attitude about it so I said "Can I pull a reverse Uno card and put it back on you?)

[@practicallyheidi8505]

Lovely video and I enjoyed many of the movies you showed. I can certainly get away with the over the top. I live with 5 men/boys. I am the only female. They have always expected me to be girly. My boys love to scare me and get a big reaction. It never fails. If you have raised boys you know how absolutely sweet they can be. Pick you dandelions, give so much affection, impress you with their muscles, etc. Boys don't lose that when they get older. Women just don't bring that out in them often but practicing girlishness definitely does. Blessings, Heidi PS. I have said a couple of times to my husband and it has made him laugh both times. With big eyes and a soft voice I say " I am sorry....big pause that you are so wrong in this instance". Not a serious fight. Something silly where he isn't real mad.

[@DixieandBob]

Love this!

[@JohnCena-yn9me]

Yes PLEASE write an entire book on this subject! Men just light up when we are girlish. But, it's not a habit with me, and I just don't think of those responses when they are needed. I need practice! One time recently I said to my man "I"m just a girl!" (at age 69) when he was complaining about something. It took him by surprise and I could tell he was pleased. I like very much how you use movie clips for examples. One movie I watched and will watch again is "Spanglish." I love this movie because of the contrast between the entitled wife, and the Spanish housekeeper and her daughter. When I saw it years ago it was a real eye-opener to how women behave and how it affects men. Many years ago I read Fascinating Womanhood. But for some reason, maybe because I was so young, I didn't 'get it.' I will be ordering the new book. Thank you so much for your work to help women, their men, and making a happy marriage. Can you imagine if the world were full of happy marriages?

[@LilithCain]

I love these old movie clips! 💙

[@maryohmaryoh]

Hi from Massachusetts. I recognized myself in your example of a comeback like, "Just because you're so handsome you think...". I have said similar things to my SO when he is being a crab and it A. tends to disarm him and shake him out of his bad mood, and, B. Is much more effective than when I get triggered by what he says and respond angrily.

[@happyhomesteader1213]

The part that men really want to make their wives happy and that it is a sense of success for him made me think of Donna Fargo's song "Happiest Girl in The Whole USA". I like to sing that song when I am feeling particularly good and my husband just seems to light up with fulfillment! I have read ALL the Fascinating Womanhood books old and new and they have fully changed my life and my marriage. Today I needed this reminder of girlishness a little extra my husband had been feeling very negative and down and I have been struggling to help him out of it. Watching this has made me realize I haven't been going about it in a girlish way, I have been taking it so seriously that it just keeps makes things more serious. Thank you ladies for the reminder and the generations of good content!

[@DixieandBob]

HappyHomesteader - so wonderful! Thank you for sharing this! 😘😘😘

[@uke7084]

Here. I am always hungry because I am thin and nursing our 4th baby. So this is how I just asked him for something: Sweet wonderful man, the provider of all good things in my life including Wendy's burgers... do you know I love you? Also. Can you please pick me up a burger on your way home? (Added gif with a cute burger dancing) His response? Emphatic yes. And asking what else I want. So yes. Appreciation is key. For all relationships! Just maybe only be cute about it with your hubby.

[@fairydust950]

I like to say "heeey, pick on someone your own size!" 😂

[@DixieandBob]

YES! lol!

[@jilly8372]

Being feminine is not weakness. Its sad that new movies often lack feminine characters. I enjoyed this video very much!

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you! 😘

[@shineyourlightlove]

@@jilly8372 I would love a movie list!

[@mariaguild2024]

I think what is appealing to men about this,(girlishness) is that it is "non confrontational" most guys don't want to go head to head with a woman.

[@DixieandBob]

Good point

[@mrs.t7254]

This was such a great episode. I feel so cheesy, but I cried. My girlishness is so far gone, I realized I don’t know how I’m ever going to get it back. I suppose I am deeply unhappy right now, which is why it feels like I’ll never get it back. But I would like to.

[@WeAreStrongwithJesus]

You can get it back with practice! One step at a time!! How do soldiers in the military become so disciplined? They don’t learn it overnight! Get yourself into your own boot camp and immerse yourself with materials and videos in your free time and start applying principles one at a time! You got this! 🙌🏻💖

[@rachelsmith5643]

This video is so inspiring! Women in media today are oftentimes so aggressive and vulgar. The clips of these women are so sweet and adorable. I like that you said it's not about being childish, but more of a girlish innocence.

[@AshleyABrannon]

I would love to read an entire book on this subject! Absolutely brilliant & works 100%! 💖 Thank you ladies!

[@uke7084]

I like this. It is foreign to me, but I like it. There is a part of me that really wants to be more feminine. In a soft, gentle, innocent way. I have the appreciation down. I am naturally direct and decisive but do not ask for things in a bossy way. More cutesy. An example: there was a beautiful necklace I really wanted. Our 10th anniversary was coming up at the end of the year and even though we don't typically give gifts for anniversary (we splurge on fine dining instead) I told my husband I would really love to have this necklace and could he give it to me for our 10th? Well he was so excited to buy me something that I loved that he ordered it for my birthday and told me to pick something else out for the anniversary. Completely surprised and delighted me. I was the same way with my wedding band. I told him I want to get married and would like a romantic proposal without an audience and here is the ring I like. All in a sweet, cutest way. Its a funny story. I liked an unconventional style. Very affordable for a wedding band. We were dating long distance at the time and he asked to see it. I send him the link to not my ring but the most costly ring on the site. Like 13k for this gargantuan rock 😆 🤣 Just kidding! I told him and sent the one I liked. We had a good laugh about that.

[@BrooklynBaby100]

Did you get married ever

[@margaretchaney5627]

I addressed my alpha male husband in the way I learned on your videos & he ended up kissing my hand & very carefully speaking to me. And I admired him about this & that. He continued on a very careful talk about the money I spend...it was beautiful. The last year was really rough & I quit speaking to him pretty much. I'm looking forward to talking to him now

[@MamasaraousSteph]

Honestly, this is like my 20th time watching this video and came to realize: this topic is so important and profound that I think Dixie you should write a WHOLE BOOK on this topic. A sister book’ to Timeless, if you will. Please, I would buy it in a flash (as I am sure dozens of women would)

[@DixieandBob]

Great idea! I would LOVE to write this!

[@jfree6054]

Any progress on the book? I need it. The recent videos with real life examples are very helpful too! Thank you.

[@MsVelandra]

Thank you so much. I love this concept! And the examples were so helpful. I feel playfulness can be used here as a word as well. I like to use: "Shame on you" with a cute girlish tone. He responds great and even started using it himself. :)

[@DixieandBob]

Glad it was helpful!

[@mirzabeg2274]

The girlish comments sounds like something you hear from fairytales! It's amazing how much power they actually have, especially if they're able to diffuse the situation!

[@DixieandBob]

It’s magical yet practical!

[@gabrielleperez6548]

I’m binge watching your videos! Love it SO much. Fan from the Philippines 😊😊

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you!

[@cristinac.m.523]

Fabulous video, so detailed! Love that it’s a longer one - I also could listen to you for hours! Xx

[@DixieandBob]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@Brenaenae]

I hate that society has gotten away from things like this! Love it 💕

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you & I agree!

[@LinaMarie1122]

This was so helpful! As a visual learner, I appreciated the movie clip examples very much.

[@meganconley3293]

This is such an important video. The topic of girlishness is what really sold me on Fascinating Womanhood. It truly works! Great examples and clips. 💕

[@DixieandBob]

Megan Conley - thank you so much! Really appreciate the support! 🥰

[@gaby5546]

Thank you so much for this video, reading about it is one thing, but seeing the examples is a whole other thing. Even though I had a pretty good grasp of childlikeness/girlishness already, this was really helpful and provided me with so many more great ideas! I'm a huge fan of Fascinating Womanhood, it has helped me so much and given me so much hope for a truly happy and fulfilling and strong marriage in my future. I don't know what I would've done without it!!! I'm also really glad that you two have carried on teaching Fascinating Womanhood, it's really lovely how it's been passed down through your generations and kept in the family. Some great modern examples of girlishness and childlikeness in movies that I love, although some are animated movies: Rapunzel from Tangled, Anna from Frozen, the early 2000's Barbie movies, Anne with an E (series), and Mean Girls (there are some pretty good examples of girlishness and exaggeration and humor in there)... those are some just off the top of my head, anybody have any others? Rapunzel and the early Barbie movies are my favorite examples of girlishness and femininity, they do it particularly well and it's really easy to observe in their characters.

[@jillhiston4531]

I have been married 43 years and I am a serious and sensitive. My husband can be verbally abusive even in front if others. I don't know how to react and cannot fight/yell back as I think it is the wring way to talk to another person. He does nothing in the house except deal with the finances and ensure the car has petrol and regular checks. I am in my 70s, keep as well-run house and serve good food. This video has given me some ideas to overcome my silent responses without being nasty. Thank you.

[@DixieandBob]

Love this - thank you!

[@gracefulhumble7248]

I could watch you two all day. Very informative thank you for the effort and free content, I appreciate the examples you gave it makes it easier to learn. Dixie I always love your background it always looks so vintage, any chance of a home tour / how you look after your home video? xx

[@DixieandBob]

Graceful& humble - thank you! I would love to do a tour. I’ve been asked this several times but my issue is how to film it! I’m not sure how to do it. Maybe cherry can come visit and do it for me. She’s the technical gal on the team! 🤣

[@cheryellecrane5615]

I found this very interesting to me. I grew up in a family of strong vocal women. Also grew up watching my parents fight. More my mother yelling at my dad and my grandmother yelling at my grandpa who was the sweetest man. I’ve had to be tough being in the Marine Corps but I still enjoy being a woman and feminine. It’s hard knowing how with the few examples I grew up with. This is a big help. It might be hard since I’m so fiercely independent lol my only question is it feels, from my perspective, that Girlishness is for the men but how do the women get their needs met?

[@DixieandBob]

Girlishness isn’t just for men. It’s for strong relationships, not just romantic ones. Under the right circumstances this principle diffuses tension with anyone you meet. But it MUST be practiced for sincerity. It cannot be an act or be fake. It also cannot be used when you are genuinely hurt.

[@lieanne61]

When I put my hands on my hips and say "you big fat meani" he laughs and can't help but just hug me but when I blow up (Still working on myself) he reacts completely differently and the situation takes a while to diffuse..

[@DixieandBob]

Exactly! 👌🏻❤️

[@claudiahudkins439]

I was watching the movie David Copperfield on AMC or TCM, and Dora was the perfect example of girlishness, the human side. Agnes was the perfect example of the angelic side. But David loved Dora more. She was irresistible to him. There's a piece about that in your mother's book🌸

[@Totallyhotchic]

I needed this video today! I’ve been struggling with how to apply the FW principles and how I kept failing at trying to express myself and failing to do it and these tips will help and have changed my view already. Thank you so much ☺️!

[@DixieandBob]

Totallyhotchic - you’re welcome! 🙌🏻

[@ivyoutwest]

Okay I loooove this topic!! ❤️ For some reason I sometimes feel like being more feminine means being quieter and not making a big deal of things, if that makes sense, but it really is just a sophistication and lighthearted way of dealing with things that I feel is already more natural for me anyways. I loved all of the specific examples too. Thank you!

[@DixieandBob]

Ivy Lauren - absolutely makes sense and you have to do what’s right and genuine for YOU! Thank you! 💋

[@marialively9673]

One thing these ladies have in common is a very cute and feminine appearance. That's another example of how in FW everything is connected, because imagine having Elizabeth's or Doris' behavior and wear pizza clothes or have a masculine attitude... Also, how can I fight the fact that my feelings show on my face? I tend to get dark and droopy faced when I am upset (which doesn't help at all!). I think it's very important to maintain a calm and charmingly frustrated attitude instead of anger. I basically have to learn to not get angry or let it show. Thank you FW ladies for the great support and advice! ❤️

[@rachelerickson7321]

Thank you for this clarifying video!

[@DixieandBob]

Rachel Erickson , thank you Rachel! 😘

[@lillianbrewer6739]

This is exactly the video I needed thank you!!

[@DixieandBob]

I'm so glad!

[@calliedreamin1686]

I love this 💗

[@brittanydonovan9579]

Mister Onion Police! That gave me such a giggle. Thank you ladies for such a helpful video ❤

[@favoredstar10]

Hi!! Why would anyone criticize what the new or traditional Facinating Womenhood concepts are-they’re perfect and tried and true. If a woman criticizes your concepts, they're in denial about themselves as a woman, and don't want to change. I feel they need much prayer!! 🙏 I'm so excited I found a KZbin channel about the concepts of my favorite book-the original “Facinating Womenhood”!! Yay!! 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

[@DixieandBob]

Yay! Thank you! Welcome!

[@arlet101]

Wonderful talk! thank you so much for the work you do. You have no idea how helpful and influential you are to my love life

[@DixieandBob]

Rosie R - thank you, how lovely! 😊🥰

[@serenalouise]

him: you forgot to lock the front door!!! me: OH! will you please forgive me??? (smiling, with arms outstretched) him: NO! (big smile) me: if you don't fix this car seat i'll take you to court!!! (jokingly) him: not possible! (serious) (next day: seat is fixed from sliding backwards.) him: where did you find that trailer??? (incredulous, as it was the exact kind he was looking for) me: oh, i don't know, i think i saw it in a dream! (giggle) him: oh, alright! i'll have a look!

[@nmc1859]

These are good examples. Sounds like you have a happy relationship 🥰 My husband doesnt joke much and sometimes he doesnt understand and then other times I miss the mark

[@renciav1141]

Love this ❤️

[@blessednhm]

I think I got the first category down lol. Every time I get upset Especially with a the opposite sex I tend to make that "Humph, humph" sound my brother always use to laugh when I did that and men I dated found it funny but they would always cave and give in. I never understood why til now lol. I'm not sure when or why I do it but I've been doing it since I was young to keep me from losing my temper and it's stuck since I was a preteen lol.

[@DixieandBob]

❤️😘

[@SevySp]

An excellent video and it jumps straights into my favourite ones : ) Thank you! Well done!

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you! 🥰

[@sheilasheila2709]

Can you talk about when men are romantic when with a woman but they don't buy flowers, birthday or Christmas gifts or Valentine's Day and how to ask for them in a feminine way and get them. New to your videos and really enjoying them.

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you - yes!

[@charnellmorgan]

A Lovely video as always! Thanks for sharing this wisdom!

[@DixieandBob]

Charnell Price - thanks lovely!

[@jacquelinejefferson1876]

That’s very good, because it was specific and visual., and didn’t just skirt around the subject. Very enjoyable too. Thank you both. JJ 🌹

[@DixieandBob]

Jacqueline Jefferson - many thanks! 😘

[@jacquelinejefferson1876]

Fascinating Womanhood - Dixie Andelin Forsyth x

[@Amandahugginkizz]

I think the notebook describes girlishness perfectly

[@MamasaraousSteph]

Food for my soul! Thank you so much for this very needed video 💕

[@DixieandBob]

Thanks you! 🙏🏻

[@mroxannevh]

I see a lot of girlishness in animes honestly. the japanese have their own version of it in expressing feminity

[@DixieandBob]

interesting!

[@shums77]

Love!

[@staybeautiful6023]

Loved this

[@DixieandBob]

Peas Be On Earth - thank you! 😘

[@FB-yz8is]

I loveeeee the clips .. please keep them going❤

[@mirzabeg2274]

Would you recommend watching old movies,as you used a lot clips from them?

[@DixieandBob]

Not just ANY old movie - we did a video on “femininity in films” - perhaps start there?

[@Peonylove167]

Where do I find that video??? This was 3years ago 😣

[@seattlegirl2077]

Does a wife have to "obey" their husbands or can they choose which things they feel comfortable with? I'm not talking about anything illegal or immoral maybe just something you are uncomfortable with. Like how to approach a neighbor about a problem. He wants me to ask for something with an approach I'm not comfortable with and actually do want to ask for in the first place.

[@DixieandBob]

We believe in more of a partnership within a marriage vs a master/slave type. If he wants you to do something you’re uncomfortable with it’s healthy to express your feelings about it. But perhaps there’s a way you could offer an alternative you are comfortable with. We just believe in romantic unions and a more romantic relationship compliments one another. ❤️

[@Cat-ik1wo]

Yes ladies, femme Fatale. So classy.

[@Yosya8059]

Could you suggest something for those prone to tears, and these tears always make things worse. How does one hold themselves together to apply these girlish responses? Because that scene from “How to kill your wife” won’t work in such a way for me.

[@DixieandBob]

It's hard to say not knowing more specifics but initially I would suggest saving your tears for a girlfriend if the tears are full of too much pain. Crying is a natural thing and can be very girlish to your advantage but not if it is accompanied with barrels of tears and. you cannot stop. Think of how a child might cry vs a child throwing a tantrum. One is endearing and the other makes you roll your eyes a bit. If you think you are in the eye rolling category then try your best to cry to a girlfriend or therapist or someone else besides your husband that you trust. You could also just run away when you know a big cry is coming! ☺️ If he doesn't follow you, it is not a sign of less love...it's just him giving you space.

[@Yosya8059]

@@DixieandBob thank you! I will think about that!

[@isashar7949]

Thank you for your content. Sincere question here. The tantrums thrown in these clips are a bit shocking and seem to be what is described as behaving like a Karen. Are there other clips that can explain this concept that doesn’t have this unattractive quality?

[@DixieandBob]

Good question, the clips are from movies so they're going to be a bit dramatic and they certainly don't fit everyones personality. It's tough to find "real life" stuff that isn't over the top. If I were you I would look up classic movies with actresses you feel fit your personality the closest. Current actresses are a bit tougher since Hollywood tends to push the narrative of women being more like men. Although Nicole Kidman, Rachel McAdams and a few others do have films that show femininity. For me, Elizabeth Taylor is my go-to for inspiration. I know this is tough to find in visuals! I also have an Instagram account where my husband and I act out little scenarios that help show more FW concepts. Maybe you would enjoy those. Take care!

[@Diamond-hg2ij]

Great video 💕 love your videos helped me so much 💕

[@DixieandBob]

Diamond 111 - thank you! 🙏🏻

[@alenagilley4703]

Thank you girls 🙏❤️😘 YOU ARE AWESOME and information a very valuable ☝️👍👌❤️🙏😘 BLESSINGS TO YOU BOTH ❤️🙏

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you so much!

[@mirzabeg2274]

Amazing work 💘🤗☺️💟!!!

[@DixieandBob]

Mirza Beg - thank you! 💕

[@dreag5717]

I want that night gown or similar (white) she wore in the film any suggestions ladies??

[@DixieandBob]

Maybe this? Solid Butterfly Sleeve High Low Hem Night Dress Check out this Solid Butterfly Sleeve High Low Hem Night Dress on Shein and explore more to meet your fashion needs! api-shein.shein.com/h5/sharejump/appsharejump?currency=USD&lan=en&id=1513546&share_type=goods&site=iosshus&url_from=GM735478427617951744

[@nmc1859]

Yes this is good💖

[@DixieandBob]

Thank you! 😘

[@__kikiadore]

Does anybody know the names of the movie clips mentioned?

[@DixieandBob]

Caroline Derosena - every single movie clip is named on the screen as it shows. Are you asking for a list that is simply organized separate from our video?

[@__kikiadore]

Fascinating Womanhood - Dixie Andelin Forsyth yes but I can go back and write them down. Thank you 😊

[@ashledashnaw2575]

I tell my husband I'm telling his mother on him lol

[@concken1]

My man would say that's bossy or manipulative.

[@tarotondex3267]

I really need a lot of help 😕😩bruhhhh

[@veronicarosewood1494]

This doesn't work for my man.

[@concken1]

threats?? ew.

[@melaniexoxo]

I love both of you but this is actually a sensitive subject, mostly because this is a huge complaint of women toward men. It hints at p3d0 ph and why older men pursue young girls. Maybe there’s another way to phrase this and discuss it? I get what you’re saying but how the idea is contexted makes me uncomfortable

[@DixieandBob]

You might consider studying the philosophy in my book before dismissing it so quickly 🙏🏻