My Family Thinks I'm "Greedy"

[@hxion]

I had someone who was driving a brand new bmw get mad at me and called me greedy because I wouldn't lend him money. I drive a 07 civic. I don't talk to that person any more.

[@dyates6380]

It's pretty funny that someone old enough to even drive a car would have to ask another ADULT for money, let alone someone driving a BMW. LOL.

[@Fred2-123]

@hxion The best response to someone who wants to borrow money from you is "I can't help, I was getting ready to ask you for a loan."

[@JustinCase780]

Such a fake story.

[@spartan04801]

Sell the car

[@LauraMacMillan-el2kc]

Guaranteed this is not fake. I learned a long time ago that a surprising number of family, friends, and acquaintances will feel entitled to your money if they suspect you have any. So I just let on like I don’t. If somehow the conversation wanders into the financial arena, and if I’m pressed, I just say, “I make a point of keeping enough money in savings to bury myself and to pay my last tax bill, so that my kids don’t have to. What about you?” Oddly enough the people asking nosy questions about my bank balance are almost always quite ready to change the subject when questioned about their own. Fine by me. Mission accomplished.

[@PInk77W1]

A single mom who is debt free and doing good ? She owes no one any excuse or apology. She’s doing great.

[@BREEZYM6015]

She's my kind of single mom.

[@alluringbliss4165]

Yet they disparage such woman online. It’s very toxic out there.

[@PoyTroy]

Facts. This was my mom. She didn’t care what anyone said. She lived right so she could not work anymore and live great. And she’s doing great. As a man I’m proud of her

[@fabbz94]

Just hope this single mom doesn't choose a loser again 😂

[@BrettKuntz]

@@fabbz94 I remember an episode of Judge Judy: She stated to a woman; I sick and tired of you women saying it's not fair. You dated the loser who would not get a job,, then you married the loser who still would not get a job, then you had a baby with the loser who would not get a job--then you want to say it's not fair.

[@hlf_coder6272]

People like that don't bother me at all. It's so transparent. There's zero chance anyone is ever going to make me feel negative about my success. I know what it took to attain it.

[@MsJoyce31202]

👍

[@Aliciam139]

Spot on!

[@dunkbiscuit]

My mum, when comparing myself to my brother, said I was lucky because I had more money than my brother. I jumped on that, because I'm not lucky, I bloody work hard for it, it didn't fall out of the sky. My brother wouldn't know hard work if it bit him on his arse.

[@beckypetersen2680]

But you are lucky. LOL. There are so many people out there in the big world who accuse hard workers of having "luck" not because of hard work, but just because of luck.

[@darex0827]

Lucky is a poor choice of words. Fortunate, blessed, etc would be more accurate. Plus you are lucky if you were born in the US. Many people work extremely hard but will never have the opportunities of those born in the US or other similar developed nations.

[@carpediem6431]

Luck: ✔️ completing assignments ✔️ studying for tests ✔️ getting a minimum wage job at 16 ✔️ applying for trade school, college or university ✔️ working during college ✔️ getting an entry level job and working your way up ✔️ living within your means… driving a 15 year old car ✔️ budgeting for savings and retirement and staying on budget ✔️ paying back every cent borrowed from a bank ✔️ working extra hours for more $ ✔️ hitting the pavement running after any job loss ✔️ delaying buying that gaming system or vacation because no money ✔️ never putting more $ on a credit card that can’t be paid at the end of the month Yeah….. Luck

[@binkle1757]

​@@carpediem6431💯💯💯

[@californiadreamer2580]

Exactly!

[@DaveBee120]

Never tell anyone anything about your finances unless your are pretty sure they have as much or more than you.

[@stevenporter863]

This is exactly why wealthy people tend to hang out together. Generally it takes away the 'walking on eggshells' about money. We live in a society that punishes wealth.

[@blackbutterfly233ify]

I can't stand people who complain about their finances but won't do anything to fix it

[@Dami6042]

That's why leftism exist lol XD 😂

[@ladynotricks1232]

Then they feel they also have to give you advice on top of it if you say anything about your financial plans. 😂

[@Thinkforyourselves64]

We lived on a pastor’s salary for many, many years. The pay was just above poverty level so we didn’t qualify for any help from the government. After 25 years in the ministry, hubby retired and started a new job. The Lord has blessed us immensely and I mean IMMENSELY, because we always trusted Him to take care of our needs. Now we are able to help others and it is SO rewarding!

[@siegfriedbraun5447]

You kinda evaluate the "Christianity" of a group of people, who are okay treating you that way. I left ministry 30 years ago, and BOY did we ever do well!

[@juliannelay248]

I'd like to know how you got your husband to retire from ministry. Going on 42 years here. 😮

[@edhcb9359]

Ministry doesn’t have to be low pay. Plenty of ministers command relatively high salaries. You just have to be good at it.

[@JustinCase780]

Gotta give 10% always!

[@cutehumor]

apparently, you poor pastors haven't heard about the prosperity gospel thieving preachers who are worth tens of millions of dollars. To go into ministry is not to be rich but to serve. I know of a pastor who preached tithing hard but for some reason thought tithing didn't apply to himself

[@robintimmerman4030]

I am an alcoholic who stopped drinking on August 21, 2006.......I will always be an alcoholic but it is my choice not to drink. I had to move and change my friends because one drink is too many and a thousand wasn't enough. I am in the middle of paying off my debt....medical, taxes, student loans and credit cards....when I started 2 years ago the total was $36,600....today I only owe a total of $10,550 left. my real friends understand why I don't go out much.....if I do, it is to their homes for for a walk in the woods or some other free entertainment. working hard to save for my future as I am 68 years old and retired.....I want to clear my debt and not leave a mess for my kids.

[@BREEZYM6015]

If you stopped drinking in 2006 then why do you say that you'll always be an alcoholic? Do you still have the urge to drink? I stopped drinking in 2016 and no longer consider myself to be an alcoholic. If you, like me, have no desire to go back to drinking then why still call yourself an alcoholic?

[@mattborden1816]

I’ve been sober for 5+ years, and I understand obintimmerman4030’s viewpoint. I drank since I was 14. I still have the desire once in a while, but I know the damage it caused my family, and won’t do it……❤

[@probablynot1368]

Perhaps the term ‘recovering alcoholic’ may better describe the original commenter.

[@MooMoo69556]

What a lifetime of being a loser.

[@danielhurst8863]

This is why you keep quiet about your savings and success. People who will blow all their money on vacations and luxury purchases, will want to take money from people who scrape and save.

[@GrnXnham]

This. I always tell people we "can't afford" this or that, when we actually can. We have plenty of money and no one ever asks us for some of it because they don't know we have it! Tooting your own horn can backfire on you.

[@costco_pizza]

The sad truth is there’s a lot of people struggling out there and that is why this caller’s family is behaving this way. We are suffering and don’t know where our next meal is coming from. Student loan relief and a proper UBI would go a long way in helping us all out. We could pay our bills and put food on the table. Why don’t Dr. John and Dave want that for us?

[@vjs4539]

If you got scammed by taking on a student loan, that's nobody's fault but your own. Just like a grandma that gets scammed on a phone call. Grandma isn't crying about the government paying for the money she lost, and neither should you!! ​@costco_pizza

[@zvmZvm0102]

​@costco_pizza I did this thing called "working" to pay back my student loans. You seriously think it's moral for me to have to pay back your loans too?

[@dyates6380]

I don't talk much about my financial situation, and never specifics, but my siblings and I talk often about investing and a place that may have a great rate for high yield money markets or whatever. I made the mistake over twenty years ago to loan money to someone - two people actually - and it was a mistake. I learned then to not do it again. I have NO problem saying "no" in a polite way. People just have to realize that no one owes them anything. No one.

[@rosak.9855]

One good thing you have to do is establish Boundaries. It takes practice. Keep your finances to yourself. Not talking about it is your business.

[@Sheryl777]

👍

[@chazzkramer7676]

People who achieve any level of success are attacked by people who wish they could do the same. They don't understand what it takes so they want yours without the sacrifices. Jealousy is a life-altering thing.

[@zvmZvm0102]

This is true, but it's also true a lot of successful people had it handed to them. The real world involves both types.

[@chazzkramer7676]

@zvmZvm0102 Whether it's "handed to them" or not, 3 things are going to happen. 1.) You manage it correctly and keep your mouth shut. 2.) You flaunt it and blow the wad. 3.) You brag about it, and people get their hands out for a piece of the pie.

[@AndreaJames-dv1rr]

Perfectly said!!!!

[@sandrab.3538]

There are many who assume that businessmen/women or individuals who are wealthy are automatically evil, greedy or have used other people. What about brains, hard work and sacrifice?!

[@zvmZvm0102]

Poor people are greedy too.

[@raiden031]

That's what happens when you listen to the mainstream media and the democrats.

[@EsiriE]

@@zvmZvm0102preachhh

[@jorgefitnessroad8302]

Even on a salary you can become wealthy, but it takes a whole lot of saving and investing, not getting the things you want, it's allways a trade off, you trade having the things you want to be financially stable

[@mattdg1981]

You forget the biggest thing. Willingness to take risks.

[@Michael_Thomas134]

I’m one of 6 kids in my family. 3 of us are doing well 3 not so much. We can get together and no one ever bothers with what the others have.

[@dyates6380]

Same here. I had five kids in my family and four are still around. We all are doing very well now but that wasn't always the case with me and my deceased sister, but never, ever did finances every come up when we were together. Ever. We just had fun around the holidays when we got together and money never came up at all. Probably because we grew up in a very modest (even though we as kids didn't really realize it) lower income family. My parents provided a great life for us kids and until my youngest brother went to school the ONLY income was my Dad, but they were raised during the depression so they knew how to stretch things and so for them it was just a matter of habit. I never understood the guilt trip people put on others for having more than them. After all, we are ALL personally responsible for our lots in life. I know I was, and after my divorce and with the help of my brother in law getting me an interview in a better place to work, I never looked back.

[@scubadivingadventures1]

Agreed! Being jealous about the money of others, is as dumb as being jealous about fitness of others. What it really come down to his, if you value money… then work hard and invest! If money truly isn’t important to you, then why would you care if someone else has more? I don’t care about lawn chairs, so I don’t care if a neighbor or friend owns more lawn chairs than me lmao. Personally I do care about fitness and money, so I work hard to try to be good at both.

[@scubadivingadventures1]

The only thing that “makes sense” to be jealous about, is things you totally can’t control- like someone’s face or height, if you’re short or ugly. I can understand that. But not money or fitness

[@Sheryl777]

@@dyates6380 I think wanting what others have, without having to work for it like the original person did, is what they do many times when they don't want to have to put out the energy it takes to do well within their own right. All they see is "Oh there's some money", and then try to see what they can do to get it away from you and into their own hands.

[@JustinCase780]

We have 12 kids as of last month. It's fantastic although we can't afford it.

[@blackvulcan3]

I feel this. I grew up poor, never had new clothes until I was 16. I worked my tail off to get any chance but had no financial wisdom. I spent like a drunken sailor because “I deserved it” in my 20’s had nothing to show for it. Since then, I saved, paid down debt, have zero debt save for a small mortgage, drive a 10 year old car, but I am now set for life and will retire before 60. I have 3 kids that we put through private education, they only know saving and investing. I get the comments now of “oh it must be nice” or “it’s easy for you”. It’s never their fault but they never sacrifice.

[@fdllicks]

Great story. I totally understand what you are saying

[@pattimartin859]

I so appreciate that letter from a single parent that has worked so hard for herself. Good financial base.....great work girl. I have been a single mother 40+ years. Very little child support. I worked 2 jobs, took 160 hours in availability per pay check, I slept on carts and worked double shifts. I did this for 13 years while my daughters were in school. I have had people say some of the nastiest things about me, even to my face. I am careful with my money and my daughters are all grown and employed. My family was OK, but not always without an opinion. Today.....I still live on my own and retired. Both of my sisters live with their children. My very hard work paid off. The Big Guy upstairs took me under his wing and said don't quit and don't look back....Amen to that advice.

[@zvmZvm0102]

Being a single mother is abusive to children. Disgusting you take pride in that.

[@jhughes974]

God will provide but we absolutely need to do our part 👏🏾🎊 bravo to you!!

[@BrazenCaballo2212]

We have this issue in my culture. There's this thing called the "crab mentality" where if you are successful and don't give a steady amount of money to your extended family members, you're considered greedy/stingy. Jealousy ensues, and now your family members are talking smack behind your back or you're simply ostracized. This is even worse for those who live in the USA.

[@iaminvesting9807]

I could hear the pinoy flag screaming all the way here in Vancouver haha! that is soooo true my guy.

[@BrazenCaballo2212]

@@iaminvesting9807 Oh man, don't get me started! lmao.

[@KnowledgeIsComfort]

Ugh! Time to get with a different culture. That’s depressing as heck!

[@zanakaysag3839]

Sounds like my culture too. Seems like it is in a lot of different cultures

[@theskinnypot]

I can tell you are Pinoy.😅

[@daddoo5268]

Picking new friends is one thing, but picking new family is a bit harder

[@stevenruyf4044]

Not really. Boundaries are boundaries, excuses are excuses.

[@juliannelay248]

Haven't had the problem with family but I did with "friends". 😢

[@paulinoaz]

If your family is making you feel that way they are not your family, let them go.

[@humpteedumptee8629]

Bro anyone can be cut off. No one needs leaches living off them. It’s one thing if you take on a personal project. You know you wasting time, effort and money knowingly, with an understood risk it won’t pay off. And it’s another thing to have leaches trying to manipulate you into handouts. And I don’t care how successful you are you can only have so many projects, and you can only bankroll them up to a certain point.

[@mssdn8976]

None of my friends or family know we have money, why tell anyone else your business

[@bettygrable6440]

The comments section does 😂

[@genglandoh]

The best line - Eeyore is their spirit animal. I am lucky I have friends who have a positive outlook on life even when they have a serious setback.

[@fionasmom6254]

"Tell me something you can brag about." I love that! I plan to use that at the Thanksgiving meal.

[@MyNameIsCorey]

A wise man once said, "if you want to change the people around you, you have to change the people around you"

[@KevinCollins-kg5hl]

I am 22 years old, lost my dad about half a year ago and I am going to receive $550k+ soon. Would it be smart to grow my money in stocks for a few years while I am in college and then invest in rental properties afterwards, or should I go for real estate investing first?

[@OliviaDawn32]

Sorry to hear about your loss. You're taking a wise step by thinking ahead. Considering your age and college plans, I strongly recommend consulting a seasoned financial advisor. They'll help you create a tailored investment strategy, navigate taxes, manage risk, and make informed decisions suited to your situation

[@ric-morris7763]

I wholeheartedly agree. Working with a financial advisor was instrumental in setting me up for life. After 32 years as a teacher, earning over $100,000 annually, I retired with a $1.6 million stock portfolio. Supplementing my income with strategic stock investments and alternative investments, such as real estate or dividends, helped me achieve my early retirement goal. My key takeaway: diversification and expert guidance are essential for long-term financial success.

[@joe-k4q8p]

Who are you working with please? can i get a recommendation. I will be retiring in 3 years and I might need some management on my uch larger portfolio. Don't want to take chances.

[@ric-morris7763]

Sure.I work with Glen Howard Chester and is NY-based. He can appropriately create a personalized plan for you, properly allocate and keep you informed on available market opportuinities. Just search the name & check if he meets your requirements, You’d find necessary details to work with to set up an appointment.

[@joe-k4q8p]

His track record looks really good from what I found online. I've scheduled a call to discuss further

[@DavisEverton]

*I'm favoured only God knows how much I praise Him,* $230k every 4weeks! I now have a big mansion and can now afford anything and also support God’s work and the church.

[@DavisEverton]

Only God knows how much grateful i am. After so much struggles I now own a new house and my family is happy once again everything is finally falling into place!!

[@ErnestEdward88]

Wow that's huge, how do you make that much monthly?.. I'm 37 and have been looking for ways to be successful, please how??

[@DavisEverton]

It's Ms. Evelyn Vera doing, she's changed my life.

[@DavisEverton]

I started pretty low, though, $5000 thereabouts. The return came massive. Joey is in school doing well, telling me of new friends he's meeting in school. Thank you Evelyn Vera, you're a miracle.

[@MildredAnderson11]

Wow...I know her too she is a licensed broker and a FINRA agent she is popular in US and Canada she is really amazing woman with good skills and experience.

[@janhatcher6991]

I totally agree with Dave. Even before he said that I was going to comment and say you need new friends. Stop hanging out with those types of people.

[@db2631]

We live in a time, that most feel they are entitled to having whatever they want and not having to sacrifice and work for it, and if someone else has it, they should share, no matter how hard they worked for it.

[@robertthompson5908]

A long time ago someone taught me to identify the people in the world that you admire and respect and seek them out. Choose to spend time with people that embody the things you value.

[@evedaghestani6738]

You've shown yourself to be a very wise man. Thank you for all the help you give.

[@Traveling193]

Very true! Family found out we are complete paid off on everything-and our families ALWAYS ask for handouts 🤨

[@Sheryl777]

@Traveling193, too bad they found out about that in the first place.

[@Traveling193]

@@Sheryl777 it’s public records when someone pays of their home in WA State.

[@Sheryl777]

@@Traveling193 Ok so you are saying you didn't tell them then? That they went and looked it up to find out for themselves? That's what it sounds like you are saying.

[@Traveling193]

@@Sheryl777 exactly. Anyone can see who’s homes has been paid off. It’s not hard.

[@Sheryl777]

@@Traveling193 Even so, a person doesn't have to talk about it to others, which is what I originally was saying about it.

[@billmelater6470]

Notice how it's never "greedy" to want someone else's money. "You have more than me, therefor I am an angel and you are evil and greedy!" I would argue for example that people who want student loan forgiveness as greedy. They get to borrow someone else's money and then demand everyone pay for their venture. Same for when people vote for school levies. "You should want to pay for my children, or else!"

[@KnowledgeIsComfort]

Socialism at its finest

[@Patricia-pp3mr]

I keep my business to myself it's quite simple. When my hubby sobered up he kept his distance from his family. His family kept pounding back the booze they didn't care about his sobriety. So he then didn't bother with them much. It was really simple for him.

[@dyates6380]

Well done by your hubby and you too. Dave is right; new friends are needed or at least not be around the old ones you had with the bad habits. It's just a human thing and nothing personal against anyone. I totally applaud your husband.

[@Patricia-pp3mr]

@@dyates6380 Thank you my husband was sober over 30 until he passed away. When he quit drinking it was because he was sick of being sick and tired. It wasn't easy for him. It was five years of starting and stopping until he finally got it right. He was around AA but mostly did it himself. Like to add he quit when our daughter was five she basically had a sober dad where husbands dad and stepfather were not sober guys. He wanted to better for our daughter and her did. She got a sober dad. Which he never had.

[@stacyfonoi]

I totally understand. I’m really close to paying off my house and excitedly told a few friends. At least two of them found this to be a negative thing. My husband and I decided that when we make that last payment, we will keep our mouth shut and just keep going.

[@northshorelight35]

I removed myself from a lot of family because of that. None of them ever helped me or anyone else. Yet they bitch about being a victim. I’m done.

[@survivingthetimes]

Trust me. I've been there. Scrape the crap off your shoe and walk away. Find friends who are successful and going somewhere. You keep hanging around that trash, and they'll eventually drag you down to their level.

[@TheCandyShopGirl]

Ive had a really bad year. One thing after another.. I really wish i had an emergency fund now. 2 steps forward, 3 back.. all year. I refuse to give up. I will be better

[@Carlie66]

Some people are so entitled. They spend their money foolishly on expensive cars, clothes and lavish vacations and save nothing then complain and point fingers when you choose to have delayed gratification and save but don't want to lend them money to fund their lifestyle.

[@N.2023.]

Well said. I hate this and deal with multiple family like this

[@emoney1231]

It's easy to be jealous of those who grew up with privilege. But if someone grew up poor or middle class and/or sacrificed to become wealthy, how do you not be happy for them??

[@beck943]

If you grew up in the US instead of a country like Guatemala or Malaysia, you ARE privileged.

[@emoney1231]

@@beck943 That's fair. Generational poverty is still hard to escape, but it's easier in the US than in many other places.

[@Lark88]

Seems like it's not just money either. I knew a guy who went to college for engineering. He told me he doesn't like going home because people in his home town would sneer at him and say things like, "you think you're better than us just because you went to college?"

[@CatWhiskering]

I've been asked that by my cousins. I answered "Yes."

[@jchrisrn1]

I had an aunt say that to me when I started school many years ago. It shocked me and broke my heart. I learned to grow thicker skin over time sadly.

[@mr.bianchirider8126]

I guess to please them you should of done nothing to better yourself.

[@barbararepko4824]

I got that from my parents when I went back to college and grad school as a working mother in my late 30’s. I ignored them and was always proud of myself.

[@KnowledgeIsComfort]

@@jchrisrn1Exactly! There’s no need for you to feel ashamed just because THEY showed you who they actually are. It just makes them easier to identify so you know who to steer clear of

[@BigJohnM]

The ending was spot on! Take control of your life. If you are doing smart things with your money keep it up and if your doing stupid things then stop!

[@PoyTroy]

Ya got to get in the mindset and stop caring what other people think or say. If I’m putting in the work, sacrifices and actually putting action into my words instead of complaining, I’m not hearing anyone. And that’s how I live now, I don’t complain and cry about things, I just get it done.

[@MikeNapoli1989]

Look, it’s your money and they aren’t entitled to it. Poor people can be selfish too. As a matter of fact, I think poor people are more selfish.

[@Sheryl777]

@MikeNapoli1989 I agree...sometimes it IS the poor people who are selfish.

[@TammyWalker-n2f]

I had a situation that is unusual. My mom lived with my brother and his family, she paid them rent for her room, their TV cable bill and half of the water bill. My brothers step daughter worked as well and she paid rent for her room, the other half of the water bill, the total electric bill. the only thing that my brother and his wife had to pay for was the rest of the mortgage and their car payments. Their mortgage is 2400 a month!! and his truck each month is 1,000!!! and they still didn't have money for food, insurance, etc. Things got bad there for my mom and she came to live with me. I'm a widow. I work two jobs to make sure that I have what I need to make it. I'm working on getting debt free, taking a while, lots of hospital bills after my spouse died. Anyway, she came to live with me. One day I was shopping for food and ran into them. My brother didn't say much but his wife looked at my basked of food and said, Oh it must be nice to have all of moms money so you can buy food. I told her I work my butt off for 2 jobs to make sure I have what I need, what mom pays is her business and not hers. And if things are so tough, why don't you get a job? She replied, I have a job, I'm "brothers" wife. They don't have kids at home, other than the adult child who works too. I don't understand the mentality of people who think that things should be given to them, nothing earned. But complain all the time about their situation and do nothing to fix it. That truck alone!! Geesh.

[@cabinnorthwi4622]

Living right feels right. Others complain. Spend time with happier people.

[@fdllicks]

I spent 12 yrs working my azz off in university, medical school and residency to become a medical doctor. In residency, i routinely worked 110 hrs a week with shifts lasting 36 hrs with no sleep. It cost me my health, one marriage, and a mountain of student loans. At the same time, i saw people make millions in real estate and construction. And i still run into people just like the caller, who say "wow, you are so lucky to be a doctor." It blows my mind people think that way. Luck??????

[@XFizzlepop-Berrytwist]

I wont discount your hard work, but I do think for some, luck is a part of it, in the sense of ones genes, and intellect. There are definitely some people who are just born naturally smart and gifted, and they can apply that to being something like a doctor or lawyer. Smarts plus hard work is a recipe for success.

[@alexanders2071]

This is very difficult when dealing with family as opposed to friends. I have significantly cut ties with my mother and her husband the past few years. I want to be there for my mom as she gets older. But they are alcoholics, and extremely negative. Any time I share positive things I've done or offer them solutions to their problems they either say nothing or shun my opinions because they think they know better than me. They are older and have more experience, according to them. Meanwhile my step dad just got arrested for pulling a gun on someone at their apartment complex when he was blackout drunk. 60+ years old. Mom asked me and my cousins for bail money. I told her no.

[@KnowledgeIsComfort]

Yikes! You’re mom married a problem and stays in that situation on purpose. You did great by saying no. The time served will benefit him more than any amount of money

[@Liznvx]

This was soooo helpful. 😊

[@momof2momof2]

Ohhhh I have had to deal with this mentality for many years when my husband was alive and since he passed away many years ago. The jealousy is such a sad thing. I have had discussions with some family and friends about how "lucky I am". Well its not luck. It's been work getting there and staying there. Not making poor financial choices. And I am always willing to help others reach their goals, the problem usually is they don't want to change. My children and I are generous whenever we can for the right reasons. We all have the opportunity to make good financial choices.

[@annathemaanderson4448]

Yeah, this is the same crap I get from many relatives.

[@JustinCase780]

My father in law is about to croak leaving us a piece of land that will get us out of debt. No complaints!

[@judygilbert9628]

The snide remark is always “must be nice” my response is “yes it is” and I have two words for you Dave Ramsey. I leave it at that .

[@anishap2023]

I feel the same way. Everyone wants to complain that life's not fair when it appears that someone has a better life, but they never see the sacrifices that another has made. It's a massive problem of entitlement. People believe that they deserve the world but don't think they should have to sacrifice anything. They overspend then ask to borrow money. They live beyond their means and refuse to work and then expect a bailout. It literally disgusts me. Seems we celebrate lazy losers these days instead of hard workers- shame

[@littlesongbird1]

Exactly. We are all guilty of as my grandma said, "looking through windows" but we don't know the whole story.

[@donaldlyons17]

Sacrifices are not the only factor in outcome so yeah people will compaign. But for real we can't make money doing anything and everything.....

[@anishap2023]

@@donaldlyons17 Yes, Sacrifices are the only factor. Everyone would love to sit at home and be leisurely, but the sacrifice would be to forgo that comfort, get up, go to work, or go to school to make money. Getting a second job to make money is sacrificing your time and energy. Cutting back on luxuries like doodash and Starbucks is sacrificing convenience. Not going out when you want to save money is sacrificing your social life. And if people can make money selling feet pics- YES you can make money doing anything...

[@donaldlyons17]

@@anishap2023 Sacrifices are not the only factor... evidence is location in the world matters...and location is also just one of many factors...

[@deelehey2827]

I have 2 of 3 sisters in law who are jealous of me and their brother. We made great choices in our 47 year marriage. Both our children are very successful. They are divorced with do nothing children that still live in their basement. But they ask for us to buy them a washing machine, tires for their car, or rent.

[@cutehumor]

it is a blessing to give than to receive 😁

[@username00009]

When I went through FPU, there was a family in my breakout group that was attending together. The parents had been through the course before, but they were attending to take their teens through the course. Their requirement was that the teens complete the course before getting their own cars. I loved that idea, and if I’m ever in the position to help someone who is struggling I may take a page from those parents’ playbook. Teach a man to fish.

[@KnowledgeIsComfort]

@@cutehumorMany people are saving for their own retirement or for their own senior care so they don’t have to go in a nursing home. Why would they give that up because someone else didn’t want to do that for themselves? Helping with something is fine but not funding their lifestyle

[@ShannonGregory-sb1gy]

Those people are like crabs in a bucket. Every time you try to climb out of the bucket of poverty, they pull you back down.

[@kimberlylepine5115]

Savannah, I'm with you. You just described every single extended family holiday before I decided to draw some boundaries for my own mental health and make new traditions.

[@hughbramlett7689]

I learned the hard way that some people, if it were possible and given the opportunity, would take everything you have and leave you in the street with nothing.

[@bch5513]

Same story different day.. for sooo many situations. I am a doctor that did 13 YEARS of higher education and did not have any life outside of it for 20+ YEARS to be highly successful. I couldn't save a PENNY paying off all that debt on no or resident, or low salary too until I was 40...

[@Mansini77]

The haves have discipline and have worked their way to financial stability.

[@1jw298]

Most are. There are others that didn’t work for what they have.

[@teenindustry]

Ignore them. Separate out general venting from people doing it tough like “ I’m having a rough time” which is just sharing their reality and insulting you with snide remarks . Empathise with the former and change the subject. Spend less time with the latter

[@bosssavage3325]

I get called greedy because I budget and don’t have extra money to spend. I’ve been told I should be able to go on vacation with the family, when, my own budget says otherwise. I dont fold under pressure and continue on as normal but then get the greedy comments etc. This is from family.

[@barbararepko4824]

Never tell anyone about your personal finances, not even family.

[@lillianfaidessbanda9540]

Who needs enemies with friends like those 😢

[@JesseGraham-l9s]

I think it needs to be talked more about the intermediate period between getting your life together. I'm kind of going through this but I'm to the point where I just got rid of them all, and now it's finding the right people to bring the new group of friends into my life is a little bit of a struggle. It's a little challenging because the old ones issue a lot of guilt when you stop drinking with them.

[@dangeroreilly2028]

There is one political party that often pushes the zero-sum game. The idea that if someone is doing very well, then someone else is doing poorly because of the guy doing well.

[@colemant6845]

"I won't get off my ASSumptions and do it Myself"... I like that one !

[@jillgott6567]

Say " yes, it takes alot of work and sacrifice". And if you are at a coffee hour move to the coffee and speak to others. Then limit the time you are around them

[@suen5006]

It's hard when it's your family; fortunately not my family. You have to focus on what you can control. Some people really do have huge barriers that are real - death, illness, but you have to see what you can control, and what you can't.

[@AnnGreen-o9e]

I find most people don't want to hang around me because I make them feel inadequate. Not my job to make people feel adequate. I just get on with my life, looking after my special needs son, my properties and working for charities

[@ggfinger1]

Great video. I'm not perfect, I have issues. We are not flashy, but I retired at 50, about a year ago. Lost a lot of friends. I've lost some sleep over friends ignoring us.

[@oldgadfly8398]

"Envy is the tax which all distinction must pay." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

[@jh26pt2]

Lions don’t care about the opinions of sheep.

[@xboxman5ify]

honestly in my opinion the best way to not feel hurt or angry in that situation is to laugh at them because they're fools (in your head not out loud obviously). that's why they'll be broke for their entire lives, instead of taking steps to become wealthy they complain about their situation and vilify people who are wealthy. that mindset is exactly why they're broke. they can't accept the fact that they're broke and other people aren't is because they didn't work as hard as those other people. winners figure out how to beat the game while losers complain that the game isn't fair.

[@paulmarshall7092]

bitching about your situation, your doing good and good is what you need. Forget people who think you should sink with them. Me, my family do not know my worth. When i die my family who i love like nothing else on this earth. Sisters, brothers,nephews and nieces, love them all. Mum's gone, Dad's gone. Extended family is all i have left and while we see less of each other as time flies, my heart is always there.

[@kshepard2947]

They don’t want a solution to their problem. They want a continuation of their story which is the problem.

[@cosmiccutie6687]

I question whether "greed" is really a vice to begin with. It tempers the worst excesses of the other six vices and built modern civilization

[@om617yota8]

This was my family, to the point of calling me "Mr. Moneybags." Somehow them not wanting them to work and expecting me to pay for everything and give them money wasn't greedy, but me just wanting to keep my own money that I'd earned was greedy. They had a lot of issues beyond this one thing and I'm no contact now. Definitely time for some strong boundaries.

[@BREEZYM6015]

I struggled for 20 years just to get by. I'm now in a much better place financially but by no means am I rich. I have breathing room and no longer live paycheck to paycheck. I have zero complaints.

[@kylehackett162]

Why do they know your financial situation? Are you blabbering and bragging about it to them? They shouldn't even know.

[@dyates6380]

I agree. I never understood that type of thing. My family (we're all middle aged now) have, obviously, a general idea of each other's financial situations and we even talk investing and performances with retirement accounts often, but specifics? Hell no. Not only is it no one else's business, WHO would even want to know about a family member's wealth or even care?

[@wl660]

Well, they will know you are doing well by the location of your house, size and cost of your house, cars you drive, and vacations you take. I would always discuss how I invest my money if asked - why not share / educate and provide advice to your family or friends.

[@kylehackett162]

​@wl660 if asked, sure. No need ton talk about it unless asked and then don't give away specifics or come across as arrogant.

[@jeandrummond9167]

I rarely discuss my finances with my family but they come to my house and see I bought a new this or upgraded that. They see I took my kids on a little holiday. They know without me having to say anything that I now have money to spend. When they ask how I afford things I tell them I’ve paid off my debts and saved up for stuff. Then the jealousy starts. Just because you don’t brag doesn’t mean people won’t figure it out.

[@whyme7996]

Funny how Dave now acknowledges that the house he built was ridiculous but STILL has a grudge against the woman who rightfully said it was ostentatious. Ego much?

[@Mr_Gabbles]

I control the variables I can but you’ll still catch me bitchin’ about the ones I can’t. Just cause it feels good to sometimes

[@tombellamy7167]

I grew up on the Southside of Columbus Ohio in a "working class" neighborhood. There are some people who wallow in their poverty, like there's no excuse in trying to better yourself so don't even try. This is why I don't discuss salary with extended family, or where I grew up. I'll be upfront with my parents and my brother: that's it. Nobody else needs to know, it's none of their damn business. If people don't know about it, they can't ask about it.

[@KittyKatVtg-n9n]

This is great! Stop blaming the president (from either side) for your success or failure!

[@tate6809]

This call is sad in that I've had the same question for a couple years now, and it's making me realize that I should probably cut one of my friends out of my life because they're not so much of a friend as a vampire anymore. IMO a lot of people use that mentality of "anyone who is doing well must be greedy" as an excuse for their own failings,

[@lillianfaidessbanda9540]

Its your money . Don't let them get to you.

[@stevenporter863]

Exactly. Unless they pay your bills they don't get a vote.

[@bobmcdoggish9659]

They are exactly right. It's time to change the church you worship in. You need a positive atmosphere.

[@sidwhiting665]

There's no worse greed than someone who didn't earn the money believing that the people who did earn the money should give it to them. Even if it's inherited, what did the have-nots do to deserve it more? At the very best, they're simply another person undeserving of what someone else doesn't deserve either. At worst, they're just envious.

[@GixxerRider1991]

It's got nothing to do with the cost of housing or groceries, it's about envy.

[@Sin-D_]

Maybe offer some tips. Read the room first tho. And do so with those who seem most receptive.

[@tylercampbell6058]

I have a brother that makes as much as my wife and I combined and he’s been through bankruptcy twice and owes everyone in the family money. Can’t live within his means. I don’t understand it. Then again he is fit and I’m not so he probably says he can’t understand why I can’t get in shape.

[@sarahcarrasco]

We're supposed to leave our children an inheritance. That's Biblical. To leave an inheritance, a person has to budget. I'd find a new church. The people at my church would be happy for me. That doesn't seem right. God bless you mama! Great job.

[@leigh3251]

I would just tell them to check out Dave Ramsey's plan.

[@momanslm6289]

The greatest most selfish people I’ve ever known or hand to mouth maybe just a little bit better off. The wealthiest people I have known have encouraged me guide me I have never offered to hand me money. I have never once thought they were greedy or selfish. What most people misunderstand is the difference between guidance and charity. There was a time I needed charity. We were given a place to lay our heads. When we no longer needed charity we needed guidance. As an adult I’ve been blessed to give, receive, share and assist. I don’t need a million dollar gift, but often I could use sound advice.

[@NiceLoki]

If you don't like something, but can't change it, then change how you think about it. Don't feel angry or guilty about how others view the world, feel proud of your accomplishments.

[@dinimueter539]

As a homeowner from Switzerland it’s still stunning to me how Americans are able to pay off their houses. In my country almost nobody will ever pay off their mortgage, it’s too high and the tax system encourages you to stay in debt.

[@andrewm.4168]

The only reason someone would know about your financial situation is because you told them. It's classless to talk about money. Just quietly succeed.

[@jdprentice720]

The most selfish, greedy people I’ve ever met have been chronically broke. They waste their money on trivial materialism and then feel entitled to have others pay for their necessities.

[@janelleg597]

CONFRONT THEM and their lousy bitter attitudes

[@LivingSweetly]

What do you do? You must let go, surround yourself with good people around you, have solid boundaries and keep laughing all the way to the bank.

[@annathemaanderson4448]

I don't have powers of persuasion, I have powers of prediction. If I had powers of persuasion everybody would be like me. However, I predict that many people will be belly up financially in short order if they don't change their ways!

[@CatWhiskering]

Honestly this is why I cannot stand most poors. Especially today's young, able-bodied socialists who feel entitled to the good life at someone else's expense, and won't learn a trade or get skills that would get them the income they need for the lifestyle they want. I just ain't having their massive sense of entitlement and endless jealousy that's never backed by any action or plans to improve themselves or their family's circumstances. If you work hard and carry out plans to improve your family's comfort and security, that doesn't mean you owe anyone else a red cent. If you want to donate to legitimate charities great, but in my experience giving money to so-called "needy" family and friends just sets them up to be dependent on you, and resentful when you say "no."

[@om617yota7]

A lot of them don't see any connection between hard work, discipline, sacrifice, risk, and success. They think the people who are successful only got there by luck. That's why they don't mind taking from others, because in their mind others only have nice things because of luck, they don't see it as stealing someone else's work. Perhaps even more tragically, they also don't see any way for themselves to get ahead. If there's no link between hard work, sacrifice, and success, achieving success isn't in their control and they think they're just stuck in their horrible situation, hoping they get lucky. No wonder so many of them are mentally ill.

[@BaeWater]

Winners lose more than losers. They lose because get out and try. Losers sit and complain and never try so they don't lose or win. Check out teddy Roosevelts speech "the man in the arena"

[@jonathangraham4151]

Having no friends makes it easier!!!!! 👍🏻

[@aliciabrowndocken4660]

My Mother was a Paranoid Schizophrenic and my Father was an Often Absent Alcoholic. We grew up in Abject Poverty. My Mother was frequently hospitalized. I joined the Military during the Vietnam War Era for a single 4 year hitch. That was followed by Community College with a little help from the GI Bill. Work Hard and Smart and you just have to find new friends and family. Remember that just because you are Blood Related doesn't make you family. My real family sort of adopted me when I was about 60. I'd walk through fire for them and they'd do the same thing for me. I'm a Comfortably Retired Debt Free Homeowner with a Comfortable Financial Portfolio. Dave Refers to people like us as Ordinary Millionaires. After the age of 18 you can choose your Family and Friends.

[@mo-anniemc8227]

Both your parents were sick and you just wrote them off ? Enjoy your money.

[@aliciabrowndocken4660]

@@mo-anniemc8227 I am enjoying my success. After High School I enrolled in our local Community College. When my Mother found out she threw me out and promised to see me starve to death in a Cold Dark Alley with an Aching Hungry Belly. She had checked with the Voices and they assured her that the Devil God Satan ran the College and that anyone who attended College was going to Worship Satan and the Anti Christ. The family had already spent 18 lecturing us on the Fact that Our Behavior was why she was sick. If we just behaved better and were more helpful then she wouldn't Hear the Voices. Later in life I was asked to feel sorry for my Maternal Grandmother. She said that they went to bed every night knowing that the Sheriff was going to call in the morning and say that my Mother had killed all of us kids. I asked my Grandmother why they didn't have my mother institutionalized and the children made a Ward of the Court. She said that they couldn't do that. Do you know how much Shame that would have brought on the Family. They just had to keep their fingers crossed and hope that nobody ended up Dead. Leaving was the best decision that I've ever made in my 71 years.

[@Sheryl777]

@@mo-anniemc8227 First of all, alicia was not a doctor, so couldn't help someone with the terrible type of mental illness that her mother had....secondly, you can't help an alcoholic like her father was unless they want to help themselves. Sometimes the best thing you can do in those types of situations it to take yourself out of those types of situations. It sounds like alicia did what she had to do to take care of herself. If she hadn't, she may have gone down with them, so I applaud her.

[@cutehumor]

aliciabrowndocken, what happened to your mother? it's not her fault she was paranoid schizophrenic

[@cutehumor]

@@Sheryl777 I disagree. You can take care of yourself and others. If all you care is yourself, just say that. God desires mercy