What We Might Learn in Couples Therapy

Couples Therapy can be a very helpful place to go when it feels very hard to get through to our partners, when we are arguing too much, or are feeling isolated and lonely within a couple.
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FURTHER READING
You can read more on this and other subjects here: bit.ly/2OxLn4y
“Like many things that help our relationships, couples therapy has a habit of sounding appallingly unromantic, involving patience, gruelling work and a host of embarrassing conversations about matters it would be much nicer never to have to think about - let alone discuss with a partner and a trained stranger. Our culture teaches us to trust and follow our feelings. But couples therapy knows this is to be a disaster, for our feelings are for the most part errant and encoded with primitive responses from a troubled past. So instead, it encourages a far wiser response: standing well back from our first impulses, neutralising them through understanding and where possible rerouting them in less self-punishing and more trusting directions.”
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CREDITS
Produced in collaboration with:
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marslizard.net/

[@theschooloflifetv]

Be sure to share this video with a friend. It helps our community to keep growing. Have you ever considered couples therapy? Or had positive experiences with it? Let us know in the comments below or we have a discussion going on right now on our app available free here: bit.ly/2nyNtFV

[@shaunmahony7653]

The School of Life please make an app for Android too

[@edwardlulofs444]

The School of Life. I have been to couples therapy several times. Sometimes it helped; often not. Now I am happily single. Not everyone has the ability to be in a stable relationship.

[@jayjustjay7871]

School of life I believe my parents are too far gone from loving each other. They are just room mates that sleep in different rooms in each end of the house. My mother told me that she will leave my father once I get out of the house. I feel like I've grown up around fake love and its hard to show love and affection when my defenses are up all the time.

[@jasminebrooks188]

The School of Life I’m looking for a video I believe you guys made it. The one where it was an example on destiny and decision making.. the example used in the video was a young man was choosing in between going to war to help fight for the country or staying home to look after his sickly mother.. please help me find it I’m looking all over your page lol

[@xavierblackwell666]

Treeeyyyyyyyyyyytt

[@ryanschlaud]

In couples counseling i learned how to argue efficiently. I learned how to stay on point, say how i feel, and exactly what i mean. I learned how to listen better. I dont just hear what she says but i do my best to understand what makes her feel act the way she does

[@Hy-Brasil]

she sounds like she is VERY lucky to have you.... hopefully she learned a few things too.

[@ryanschlaud]

@@Hy-Brasil we are both very lucky, thank you

[@truthteller9522]

This is why I want me and my husband to go to couples therapy so badly. I live him so much and want our marriage to be saved.

[@stephanieduncan9023]

Lies and Infidelity is a very serious issue to deal with and it’s a major threat to most marriages and relationships.Scars left behind from a narcissist husband is hard to erase from the mind. I was reluctant at first about finding the truth about my cheating husband but I’m glad I finally took the courage for it .I got help from Cyber Hack Solutions as he helped clone my cheating husband’s phone and I got access to all his phone call logs, emails, text messages both deleted texts and also social media chats; whatsApp , Facebook, Instagram without having access to his phone because he is mostly out of town due to the nature of his work and I was able to track his location too, all I provided was his phone number to this wonderful hacker. This was very revealing for me as he’s a serial cheater until I got into his phone and ended things.I’m glad to uncover his, lies, secrets and Infidelity. You can contact this amazing Hacker David via gmail (cyberhack003) or text and call on his phone and WhatsApp : [phone]

[@evertola3598]

Kudos for the video content! Apologies for the intrusion, I am interested in your opinion. Have you researched - Trentvorty Ideal Vision Theorem (search on google)? It is a smashing exclusive product for getting the love of your life back without the hard work. Ive heard some super things about it and my GF at very last got amazing results with it.

[@sdsumiguel5937]

As a couples therapist I’ve learned several things. Here are those that stand out: 1) Go before you need it and continue. Waiting until things are on the brink of divorce is like waiting until your car engine is emitting heavy smoke before calling your mechanic. It would have been better if you had gone regularly and fixed smaller things along the way. 2) Communication is not the problem. Every single couple says they are in therapy to improve communication but they can’t really define what that means. No client has ever said “Bob cheats on me but our communication is awesome.” Ask yourself what you are fighting about most and there you will find the source of this supposed communication problem. 3) A good therapist will at some point in the process, upset each member of the couple by calling them out on their pettiness and unfairness. It’s the therapist’s role as a mediator to point out flaws in logic and mistakes in perception.

[@trustinflames1022]

Hiya, just read your comment after I posted my own. Just wondering what’s your thoughts on, my situation. Me and my wife have been separated 3 months. She said loves me but not in love, then She forced me to leave our home and I have been living with parents. whilst I find some where to live. Sense then the reason for leaving me has changed ever time it has come up. I have been therapy myself after she left me, trying to make sense of it all. She says one thing with voice but then her body language says something different. We have two children together, 7 and 3. Over Christmas we spent lots of time together and the following week went on a date, something we hadn’t done for a long time. We both agreed we enjoyed our selfs and she asked for some time and to space to think. She has agreed to join me in therapy something she was dead set against when she chose to leave me, she wasn’t prepared to try.

[@useridcn]

@@trustinflames1022 pay for the treatment. Not trying to get it for free via YT comment section.

[@trustinflames1022]

@@useridcn we did and have back together for other 3 and 1/2 years.

[@Phoenix_Atlas]

Couples therapist always seem to favor the female. I'm in couples therapy now and it's basically just the therapist and my girlfriend trying to wrestle me over my core values they disagree with.

[@trustinflames1022]

@@Phoenix_Atlas that’s what I thought would happen to me. But to honest with ours, she was on our my side. What completely shocked me. I expected to be in your shoes and fighting a up hill battle. So I feel for you and can only imagine how you my be feeling.

[@TheChurchHistoryChannel]

I honestly find School of Life videos hard to watch. They speak directly to the issues in my life. I realise I can watch philosophy and politics and history and comedy videos all day long, then I get a SoL video and I skip it. I ask myself why and it's because they cut right into that raw part of me. That part that doesn't want to reveal itself. That part that hurts really badly. I realise then that these are the videos I need to watch the most.

[@theschooloflifetv]

What a lovely way to put it! Thank you.

[@clairedeluna2116]

I can t believe you said it. I couldn t find the words and the meaning either. Thank you.

[@MeowMeow00006]

The Church History Channel that’s good!! all the best. Just remember you will never be perfect, no one is

[@nacarreira777]

That's a sign of your wisdom.

[@panedole]

Excellent Video clip! Excuse me for butting in, I would appreciate your thoughts. Have you researched - Trentvorty Ideal Vision Theorem (google it)? It is a smashing one off product for getting the love of your life back minus the normal expense. Ive heard some pretty good things about it and my best friend Jordan got astronomical results with it.

[@Silly-Little-Mama]

I went to couples counseling three times with my ex in an attempt to FIX our problems. Unfortunately, the resentment and abuse that went on had done it’s damage and counseling did not save us. It only prolonged the abusive situation and I stayed entirely too long. It did, however, help me have a healthier future relationship. I have used all the learned communication tools with my husband and I am so glad I had that knowledge to bring forward with me.

[@AnnieeBubble]

As the channel has been going fo a few years now, I feel we take much of its content for granted. The insights are golden, and the animations are so beautiful they are basically art. They come fairly frequently so we do not stop to appreciate it fully. So thank you

[@MichaelJayValueInvesting]

Seems like much of this all just boils down to honest communication.

[@jeremymenning56]

HONEST communication includes HONESTY with one's self. My guess is one or both of most couples understand how to have outward honesty but utterly lack the ability or comprehension or will power to challenges themselves with inner facing honesty.

[@graemeroberts2935]

Then obviously honest communication is not easy to achieve.

[@mobstigo1234]

Michael Jay - Value Investing frugal honest communication, I always see you at beat the bush

[@Bill-fe1nb]

You are here too!

[@kefsound]

No

[@drakedrones]

I went to mine and learnt: 1. You cannot make someone love you who is not invested in you. 2. No matter how much you do, you can never make a selfish person reciprocate. 3. If your spouse dislikes you for no apparent reason and is irked with everything, the relationship is over.

[@amrwagdi9427]

Drake Drones So you left him or what?

[@drakedrones]

Amr Wagdi what would any wise person do? You don’t “leave”, you “let them go”

[@MK-ih6wp]

@Bellasky39 Dewitt that is a very difficult situation, I'm sorry you are dealing with that. I hope you two will try therapy, together as a couple, but also individually in 1:1 sessions. that's a tough issue to work through and will require professional help, esp if either of you have children. best of luck, friend. take care.

[@stephanieduncan9023]

Lies and Infidelity is a very serious issue to deal with and it’s a major threat to most marriages and relationships.Scars left behind from a narcissist husband is hard to erase from the mind. I was reluctant at first about finding the truth about my cheating husband but I’m glad I finally took the courage for it .I got help from Cyber Hack Solutions as he helped clone my cheating husband’s phone and I got access to all his phone call logs, emails, text messages both deleted texts and also social media chats; whatsApp , Facebook, Instagram without having access to his phone because he is mostly out of town due to the nature of his work and I was able to track his location too, all I provided was his phone number to this wonderful hacker. This was very revealing for me as he’s a serial cheater until I got into his phone and ended things.I’m glad to uncover his, lies, secrets and Infidelity. You can contact this amazing Hacker David via gmail (cyberhack003) or text and call on his phone and WhatsApp : [phone]

[@nickstl77]

@UCdQYHmYY4zgbSes85gO81Yg fuck off spam bot

[@VioletannaVlogs]

Kinda irrelevant but there were two girls (not in my year) who went to my school who hated and I mean hated each other. The type of hatred where you don’t think they’ll ever be okay. One day apparently a teacher sat down with them to talk things through and while they didn’t become friends they did become civil. It just shows having a third party to talk things out can really help even in a situation you think that could never be improved. There’s always hope for a positive change :)

[@JapanLovers]

A good therapist will teach us to teach ourselves how to be transparent while choosing empathetic words to do so in the compony of our partners.

[@pancholopezpaz]

If only my parents would have had the opportunity and the will to see a couple therapist. I have a great hope that psychotherapy and couples therapy can actually make the world a better place. Well done School of Life! keep going

[@Allin1Xavi]

I second on that!!

[@diemon_spawn2732]

Yeah it helps to go to counseling if even if u both in healthy relationship, usually couples try to go at a point where there at point of breaking , its better have a stronger foundation then repairing it while it falling apart

[@anamariakitty]

Just what I thought as well.. I feel that we're thinking about couples therapy only when we're on the edge of breaking up and usually we don't even bother to give it a try. Such things could be avoided by simply trying counseling just for curiosity. I wish that I'll be with someone who would agree to see a therapist with me without being ashamed of that or finding it silly (and also to afford this and have enough time to do it).

[@getmyswaggeron]

I love you guys. You have allowed me to gain control of a lost and troubled/suicidal thought filled mind and I cant thank you all enough.

[@davet5033]

“Love is the attempt to form a friendship inspired by beauty.” - Cicero

[@Vivi-xq1gg]

I'm single why even am I watching this?

[@jilliansmith7123]

Rein Chan: Maybe...so in case you get lucky, you'll be more ready!

[@metalbotanist6730]

Hes lucky to be single.

[@drakedrones]

Rein Chan you must know how much having a partner can be taxing sometimes

[@metalbotanist6730]

Drake Drones Yes, if youre a man and not gay.

[@kaii7944]

No matter what your sexuality is.. this is useful information for anyone. Prepare yourself for future relationships.. trust me. I wish I had SOL when I was 18 and first got with my partner.

[@Milestonemonger]

We've been married for 35 years, couple's therapy is a luxury we couldn't afford, we solved our problems the old-fashioned way, we talk, yelled, slammed doors, yelled some more, made up, said sorry then went to bed. ❤

[@stephanvillavicencio5679]

i'm sure this approach works when both sides tolerate it.

[@mbyrd6713]

Yep, I grew up with those parents, so thankful for therapy 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@jessestam]

It's the saying "sorry" part at the end, that makes all the difference.

[@justjussy973]

Just love this guys voice. Instant calm 🥰

[@ryanfinch3037]

I wish I could have watched this video five years before it had been published; however, I am grateful for it now

[@damngoodlistener]

Great video you guys - thank you

[@roberteli]

This video was beautiful 😍 and very concise and easily understood

[@OneaeBlack]

All this stuff is very eye opening.

[@tracesprite6078]

This sounds really wonderful.

[@da504ever]

ugh. my sister went to couples therapy with her "meh" boyfriend and the therapist did everything he could to salvage this ridiculous relationship. Now she's been sending me pictures of engagement rings. This shit works, but it also might not actually be in the best interests of the people in the relationship. Sometimes people just shouldn't be together.

[@pibblesnbits]

I agree, I got a sibling doing the same thing and he is blind to how fowl the person he is with really is. I am a strong believer in the sunken loss fallacy. If you invest excessively in something irrational, you begin to believe that investing more is less of a bad idea. In many cases, couples therapy can be another 'little investment' into something that just may not be worth it.

[@Hy-Brasil]

I'm confused.... the therapist fixed their relationship and now she is excited about getting married. You used descriptive words like "meh" and "ridiculous" but those sound rather opinionated..... is he abusive? violent? apathetic? a drug addict? Is he judgmental? Is he a freeloading millennial who needs a mother figure to care for him? What exactly is "meh" anyway? Does it mean Boring? Mediocre? Is he not wealthy enough? He's probably fat too, right? Or the wrong race? Obviously he's "meh" in your opinion but she is happy enough in her relationship to share this dream of spending her life with him....and all you can do is wish they would stop being ridiculous? (are you single? jealous perhaps? maybe a little?) I think your comment says more about you than it does them or therapy(in one sentence you said "It works!!! Dammit...." That's weird..... I am ONLY going on what little information you've provided, which isn't a lot. I can't judge the situation, only ask questions because this is REALLY puzzling..... you're actually mad that they salvaged their relationship? Isn't that a little like being pissed off that your cruise ship didn't capsize and sink in the middle of the Atlantic? I guess it's normal for family members to hate the outsider. They're aliens... Strangers... they want to kidnap your relative and keep them all to themselves. Yeah my family hated my husband too. No real reason. He was just not part of their social circle. He wasn't "from around these parts".... and obviously I was young and naive and needed to be protected from this interloper. I am so glad I didn't listen to them because quite frankly, my family knows DICK about what I like, want or need. They have all fucked up their own relationships and found ways to cope by eating and drinking to excessive amounts.... meanwhile.....14 years later I'm still quite happy with my choice. He's far from perfect, and I have my own problems..... but at least I try to solve them. Your sister is obviously doing the same thing and all you can do is call her efforts "ridiculous" and "meh".... and again I will restate the obvious... I don't have much information to go on. maybe there is a lot more behind that curtain. and I don't expect you to respond (at least not kindly) not that it matters...... We don't know each other and I have no investment in this matter. But it did strike me as incredibly pathetic and sad on your part to describe your sister in this way...and to perfect strangers.

[@oliviajones9026]

Emily Pollifax I think you read too much of what she said and heavily indicated too much of a personal connection. This guy might not even be like your husband and I doubt what she said was nothing too out of context. All she stated was that sometimes couples therapy is not in the best interest of the couple themselves. Which I can believe because it's possible to make a lot of coin off of a business like it. What am saying though is maybe she sees something in the guy that is not right for her sister? Or maybe she thinks her sister can find another man that can treat her better and have better expectations but she's not sad and pathetic for voicing her opinion. Marriage is sacred yeah but not everyone needs to get married.

[@mrq1701]

All I see is someone bitching about their sibling having different likes and dislikes. Who the fuck are you to say what is in your sister's best interest? Communicate your concerns clearly, then respect your sister's decisions and be supportive, even if that means you end up being proven correct later down the road.

[@cynthiajohnson9412]

Doesn't work with a narcissist. When you tell them how hurt you are by something, the narcissist takes mental notes on how to turn the screws on you. It's actually hurtful to believe that sharing your feelings and vulnerability is gonna make things better.

[@yoesw5637]

you mean is a narcissistic personality disorder = NPD. that's a hard case if i might say. Man or woman with NPD will dried you to the bone...

[@StandingLeaf]

Well it would, but then someone with NPD would be strongly against such therapy to begin with as the presence of a third party would be (rightly) seen as a threat to be able to control the other without any possibility of a negative consequence to himself. And if the narcissistic actually think of psychotherapy as new ways to screw on the partner further, it would be detected by the psychotherapist after a short while and would consul the victim to prevent it from happening again. At the end there is simply no way for a narcissistic to get the upper end with psychotherapy sessions.

[@miller5170]

@@StandingLeafI disagree lol they are charming and can act like everything was your fault and that includes lying

[@haikonieuwoudt6373]

This is beautifully animated.

[@raquelgrajeda7492]

I would like to forgive my ex boyfriend so we can continue with out lives and raise our daughter. So much stuff happened and I feel like, after more than a year, I still can't see him and feel peace at the same time. We have been thinking about going to therapy together, but still it might be something I have to work by myself.

[@JohnsonKayla12]

This is almost my exact situation. We have a kid together, we want to work, but I’ve put up a lot of protective walls and we have developed toxic communication habits from the hurt I’ve experienced from him and in return caused him. I’m now the avoidant partner almost so we never work out when we try. I’ve decided it’s either couples therapy or we’re not gonna be back together. Hope it worked out for y’all together or that you all are happy apart now!

[@MosesEmmet]

Couples therapy is a good idea if you can find a coach or a therapist who actually cares about your relationship, vs siding or vilifying one person or the other. Do your homework before you bring in a third party or it will be more damaging than not going at all.

[@boomyvoomy]

You're always the couples therapist when thirdwheeling

[@bingo1232]

Call me a freak, but I think couples therapy sounds VERY EXCITING!! Is “she” worth it? Yes. Is it good for me? Yes. Might it help to improve the amount of love in the world? Yes. OK!!!!!!!!

[@masterofdisguise1112]

Been binge-watching a lot of your videos my mind is Fuck up right now..

[@hazedblue7]

ok nvm all your video animations are amazing wtf!!

[@diabianeyah]

I watch The School of Life videos because they make me feel I'm smart and like I'm doing something useful on KZbin. It makes me feel good about myself. I don't know if this is a good thing or not especially since sometimes my brain finds it difficult to process the information because of the beautiful English accent and voice.

[@amaliarios78]

I know what you mean about the challenge of fully understanding! But on the bright side they're still interesting even after my 5th time watching it :)

[@diabianeyah]

True. I sometimes watch older videos that I've already seen and understood.

[@michaz.3075]

"I consider marriage a very important institution, but it is important when and if two people have found the person with whom they wish to spend the rest of their lives - a question of which no man or woman can be automatically certain. When one is certain that one’s choice is final, then marriage is, of course, a desirable state. But this does not mean that any relationship based on less than total certainty is improper. I think the question of an affair or a marriage depends on the knowledge and the position of the two persons involved and should be left up to them. Either is moral, provided only that both parties take the relationship seriously and that it is based on values." ~ Ayn Rand, Playboy interview, March 1964

[@brandonstolz6283]

I would love if in the future, you created a dual version of every video with "simple" or "straightforward" language while labeling your current videos "nuanced" language. Just because I know many people I would love to send this to, but they would either full out acknowledge they didn't understand half of that, or they would simply unconsciously zone in and out, with the difficulty of spinning the ideas in their head that correspond to the deeply nuanced language.

[@kaylas7931]

I wish they taught this in school.

[@otilialampman7850]

Omg. Why didnt I listen to this before yesterday

[@user-gf9xo6xz1w]

Team work and learning all the time 🤣

[@AngelOne11]

Such a great video. I really enjoyed it

[@andreimouraviev2981]

You should do videos on psychology!

[@Matrinique]

But how do you know if you should try to salvage the relationship vs just stopping it because it's just too hard? Shouldn't the person you fall in love with be easy to be with? Someone who shares your values and respects you?

[@thebeautifullibra11]

No

[@yarazooom]

IF you cant be honest with your partner...why get married? maybe 'we' need to learn how to be responsible adults BEFORE we get married. be kind always. be honest and ACCEPT your partners honesty ....take more time to be alone with your REAL FEELINGS. get a babysitter once a week WITHOUT FAIL...kids will end your marriage faster than cheating

[@user-wb2du3um6t]

Fear of someone yelling at you

[@cheriel4712]

Could school of life do a video on intermittent explosive anger disorder?

[@unluckydova]

Now this is epic

[@GiffysChannel]

does it sound weird to want a partner so I can figure out how and why it is so hard to get and stay with a partner?

[@Ace_52]

Hows that going?

[@GiffysChannel]

@@Ace_52 pretty good when I stopped worrying about it and started doing things I can be proud of and make me happy.

[@forestshade9451]

If counselling can change how people feel about each other or if it can force someone to love who dosnt want to, or make a selfish person not so selfish, it migjt work

[@PaulSutherlandnow]

I'd like to dedicate my viewing of this video to my 3 ex-wives

[@MsRavenousWolf]

Unfortunately I'm open to couples therapy but my partner is not. He has this bad view or perspective on couples therapy thinking that they're going to tell him he's a horrible person.

[@AnekoFoxx]

MsRavenousWolf If he thinks that they’ll tell him that he’s a horrible person means that he believes there are times where he is a horrible person and does not want to acknowledge it to change.

[@MsRavenousWolf]

@@AnekoFoxx I think your right on that but I have tried telling him he has self esteem issues but he refuses to listen. I'm interested in psychology and how minds work but not licensed to get through to him. He has to see it for himself.

[@Silly-Little-Mama]

They won’t blame someone or take sides. It is about helping you two work together. The therapist is a mediator, helping both sides to communicate, see each other in a different light, understand each other. Their goal is to get you to be partners. Someone might be recommended to a class, like anger management, or communications. In that way your SO may be singled out but no one should be told “you’re a bad person.” Therapist would be in serious trouble for that statement. GL! It’s hard to get some people to go. Hope it works out for you.

[@yossarianmnichols9641]

The couples therapist I saw did not use any of those principles. There are a hundred in the phone book and it is pretty much a roulette wheel in picking one.

[@LucidFL]

Good thing I'll never need couples therapy because I'll never be in a relationship.

[@fatimac.middleton8454]

August 01, 2020.

[@trustinflames1022]

Well, me and my wife have been separated for 3 months. After a difficult a couple of months over Christmas we spent time together and went out on a date the following week. We have agreed to try couples therapy, but it seems that we have different vie on what outcome we both want? Let’s hope we are able to repair what’s ever been happened.

[@FabiJenneke]

How did it go?

[@trustinflames1022]

Jenneke it’s difficult to say if it has worked or not? She didn’t want to go back after the third session, what lead to us having a big fight over, then a few days later she opened up about something that seems to a root cause for the separation and asked for my help. I am now back home and we are trying again, so it’s hard to say if it had truly helped or not.

[@FabiJenneke]

@@trustinflames1022 At least you are both still trying and talking, I wish you all the best.

[@mberrier4356]

Can you all be in Louisville (USA) for couples therapy?? 😔

[@sebastianelytron8450]

Did I just watch a six minute ad?

[@bolivar1789]

I really don't think so. They don't say that they are the best ones who offer this service. If it is an ad, it is one for the couple therapy itself , WHEREVER you can get it, as a possibility to help you have a healthier and more fulfilling relationship. I don't mean to offend you of course, but if we want to be fair, we should put it this way.

[@goawayplease6456]

Maybe

[@sarah18497]

Yes. And you will never get those six minutes back :D

[@fernandohernandezvideos2987]

Mi novia no me quiere, que puedo hacer !?

[@danielc5205]

I was always told that emotional needs are codependency problems in relationships.

[@Anarcath]

There are walls around some people that the greatest mountain climber couldn’t even begin to climb.

[@nikkivix1]

I’m one of those people

[@katarzynalindner594]

Every wall can be put down. It is just a matter of time, skills and motivation.

[@luciferalpha3080]

Why am I watching this? I'm single.

[@lolacookie453]

To remind yourself of all the baggage and drama you are NOT missing out on.

[@luciferalpha3080]

Lola Cookie Yessss

[@supersearch]

Some things CANNOT be negotiated.

[@5qcW_WLlgt6-lke9-_kiQg]

This is interesting. What do you mean?

[@supersearch]

@@5qcW_WLlgt6-lke9-_kiQg, people cannot negotiate love, or desire, for example.

[@5qcW_WLlgt6-lke9-_kiQg]

You are correct. I know this argument. Funny thing with me, probably with other too - desire increases and decreases according to the level of mutual understanding, cooperation and demonstrations of positive/negative attitudes and behaviours. And they can be very well negotiated.

[@lissx_]

my parents fight all the time and I’m sick and tired of it 😞

[@bennichols561]

I have been that parent. You could try talking to them. One reason parents stay together and fight is that they both love you.

[@waynet8496]

What about family therapy?

[@MrAllanGuitar]

These videos really need Spanish subtitles! I want to show them to some friends but they only speak Spanish :/

[@theschooloflifetv]

Feel free to add subtitles. You Tube makes this very easy. Thank you for watching.

[@MusicforSweetyinSD]

Therapy is good

[@ZombieDragQueen]

How does one know they need/would benefit from couples therapy instead of individual therapy?

[@brittanyb4400]

From my experience, it would depend on what you want to work on/where the origin of an issue lies. If you want to work on yourself and how you behave in relationships, then individual. If you and your partner need to work on issues between the two of you, then couples. If you can't tell where the origin of a problem begins, then you may need to develop your self awareness and individual therapy can be a tool to help you get there.

[@ZombieDragQueen]

Brittany B Therein lies the issue. If you're unsure, then that would mean taking individual therapy at the same time as couples therapy. Because if things have got so bad that you need to resort to couples therapy, then it's a safe bet to say that your partner will not accept "Honey, I'm going to do some individual therapy, talk to a psychiatrist and test for personality disorders, so let's put off couples therapy for a few years. And if I get a clean bill of health, so to say, then we'll do the couples therapy. You also might want to go into individual therapy. Because if it turns out I'm neurotypical and you're bipolar, borderline etc or vice versa then we might not really need couples therapy anyway." So, at what point and how much time, energy and money any of the parties have to invest until one says "Look, life is too short and I'm at the end of my wits. We should break up"? Because if the couple communicates and says "ok let's give our relationship six more months and in that time we should be able to reach a few goals in improving our relationship. If we both can reach those goals we should readdress the issues and think why and how have we been able to reach those goals and to what purpose? Have we reached them just because we don't want to be alone?" And if you can agree on such a plan then you probably don't need couples therapy. But to leave you on a happier note. The comedy group Whitest Kids U Know did one such segment where a frustrated husband takes to VR-therapy in which he gives his wife a "knuckle sandwich" after which all is good between them. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jZ-oY4mNbN-Kqqs

[@SexyWellness]

Yes! AND... Learning new ways to touch, soothe and pamper your partner can extend the magic of a relationship for years! When hands can say what words can not - Here's where you can learn how - kzbin.info/aero/PLWlBxIOjpKja7Zppzhlc-uBljDeNAjKGl

[@nkngs3786]

This really just makes me realize how much I should just fucking walk into the woods and disappear... the amount if suffering and effort that goes into something as fucking simple as love is just... a nail in the hopelessness casket. This shit is fucking hopeless.

[@thesteadfastduelist6258]

*My waifu and I never have problems.*

[@indridcold8433]

I have no counterpart to be considered part of a couple. Why is this in my suggested video list? I have not been part of a couple since 8th of August 2000.

[@whateveryou9382]

And your kids isn't your personal marriage counselor

[@briansolomon2969]

But, what do you do when your spouse, GF/BF, or SO refuses to go to couples counseling?

[@elizabethscott584]

Go to therapy for you!Sometimes partners see you go to therapy and become stronger and better and they will join. But most importantly you need to take care of you!

[@klang5176]

when this channel post something, it is somehow similar to anna akana's vids. hmmmm

[@connerfields4753]

Is it unusual for me to have teen-like arguments with my parents into my late late 20s? Like about job searching and my spending? If so am I childish and immature, or even a bit pathetic?

[@daisynava7652]

If you’re coming to those conclusions then it has to be for a reason

[@mycount64]

prior to both splits couples therapy was designed to make the woman correct

[@RebeccaJ720]

I’m single so IDK why I’m even here.

[@RS-io6vm]

that Kim and I love is like gas and Styrofoam. burns for a long time

[@kristenArtuso]

why does my boyfriend hate me

[@xZadZerolf]

Pome :3 Maybe one day

[@hiphopheaven]

Therapies seems useless to me in the end the solution is within you

[@petemiller9865]

👊✌️

[@madhurip6431]

Nahi padhna hai itna mujhe

[@danavest]

Sexless marriage for over ten years and after she moved into another bedroom and I bought a life like sex doll she accused me of cheating on her

[@kaylahbkitty9691]

Bro just leave its not making sense. That long like I understand hormones and depression but shiiiiiiit.

[@danavest]

@@kaylahbkitty9691 it’s my house plus I just caught her with a guy in her bedroom told her to get the fuck out

[@ilovegodandjesusjohn316]

Hebrews 3:12 Take heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief, in departing from the living God.

[@teachd.berainman869]

the only thing that u will learn in couples therapy is that u shouldn't have got married

[@cozyclair]

*surely people who dislikes this video are sINGLE SINGLE SINGLE!!*

[@metalbotanist6730]

I am single.

[@LunyMilky]

Gotta learrn 2 work together..

[@user-nu8cg6jc3i]

Not to be ugly, but I'll be waiting for the day But they try to force people do things they don't want to do. Because I really believe it's our business. A relationship. It's hard to handle these families have been to the military and other situations. I'm very offended by some of these people and how they think they can just snatch someone's money. Yes life is good and everything for some people. It is an opinion in which everybody in this world has a right to their opinion. I don't have to keep it to myself. I want someone to get in my face and want to bother. And cross my line, I don't. Think it's funny? How cute people think they can get because of the authorities. The authorities has nobody to me because they don't have They write. Is better off ignored. I just want them to know that I don't think much of any of them they're. .There are people, too, like everybody else.. At which they'll be ignored who cares life goes on.

[@graemeroberts2935]

Couples therapy, and psychotherapy in general, is poorly presented as a service. Based on some experience, I doubt that the metropolitan area in which I live (population about one million) has anyone competent to do this work. I question the intelligence, wisdom, and competence of most so-called psychotherapists, but the real problem is that there is no way to find out. We can go to friends of acquaintances for recommendations, knowing we should take most of them with a grain of salt. Professional qualifications are no help at all. And some of them are simply money-grubbing charlatans. So we do the best we can by watching School of Life. And even though School of Life offers this service in London or over the Internet, I don't see any credible evidence of its quality or performance. At £100 or USD 125 for 50 minutes, thats an expensive experiment. Am I alone in considering that the psychotherapy offering damages the credibility of this otherwise superb organization?

[@lanz2862]

Dot dot dot

[@thefirefenix7194]

,

[@mohammedicheaib1]

Couples Therapy is the worst ever.

[@madhurip6431]

Boring hai

[@bumrayspannagan7259]

Al Gore.

[@stevenwonder7]

First