Things I've Learned Since Getting Engaged | Jackie Aina

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Phil 4:13

[@FayeInTheCity]

“Do not tell your friends your business”. A word! I’m going into year 4 of marriage and I can’t yell enough how maintaining privacy is necessary!

[@tlnicholas]

When she said that I wanted to say Abba in my Faye voice 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@koetissasearcy4253]

Say that Amen

[@Mrs.Frierson]

Who do you talk too?

[@twice_velvet]

@@Mrs.Frierson probably no one, a lot of ppl don't value friendships

[@TheCosmicInitiative]

Omg yes also just had my 4th year anniversary and that’s key

[@littletiger06]

One tip I learned from my therapist is “be the partner you want”. You need to be an example of what you want in the relationship. Don’t expect your partner to change.

[@jackieaina]

This is a good one!

[@fredaaa-]

Yes !

[@faith6575]

That’s good.

[@sadieg3264]

great advice

[@notoriousMAG]

Be the partner you want AND make sure your partner appreciates you and reciprocates your efforts

[@janinestclaire5289]

And most importantly don’t stop being friends with your fiancé/ husband. Continue to date each other, continue to flirt and continue to laugh together.

[@withapinchofsteph8044]

Yesss this!! Just because the title change doesn't meal the relationship has too

[@yoliyoli95]

I’ve been married for 2 years now and a huge lesson I’ve learned is that when you have an issue that truly bothers you, tell them RIGHT THEN. Don’t be waiting until you’re about to cause your own personal tornado, 5 years later, to bring up. If you didn’t say it before, don’t save ammo 💕

[@MrsDegrassi615]

Hello! This is the one 😭👏🏾

[@maaanuervin]

“Don’t save ammo” a whole word. Thank you!

[@af42615]

I’ve been married for 6 years and with my husband 13 years in total… and I’ve learned that when you have spats or disagreements…. Your argument isn’t to “win”… it’s to reach common ground and a solution. You’re a team and the goal is always to get back to happy.

[@Carpathianpixie]

That's really good advice. I need to keep this in mind.

[@kirstyhall2346]

This is so beautiful 💖

[@Bribreezzzyy]

“STOP GETTING INTO RELATIONSHIPS AND FORGETTING EVERYONE ELSE EXISTS” ohkay FACTS!🥺 at all my old friends 😅

[@mimim6857]

Say it louder for those that need reminding.

[@Tamara_YT]

Okay!!!!

[@Gaia007]

Sadly this a Really common issue

[@Veve1014]

My friend does this to me all the time, ditches me for her man so now I don’t even bother with friends because it always happens to me when it comes to friends.

[@finessefine]

…& then expect to come running back after divorce and decades expecting to pick up where you left off. 🤦🏾

[@vikkild2243]

Jackie I'm 55 and married 28 years, this is my second marriage. Keep your business to yourself because family and friends don't forget nothing! They still be mad while you're happy and over it!!!!

[@nafisahussein9267]

Even though I agree with that most times, some times us girls can use that as an excuse to turn a complete blind eye to major red flags

[@strawberrycheesecake7912]

@@nafisahussein9267 thats why you kinda need a married couple you can get advice from

[@vikkild2243]

@@strawberrycheesecake7912 💯%

[@yazminealiya318]

"Stop getting into relationships and forgetting everyone else exists" this!!! you can't expect your friends to be there for you during rough times if you ignore all of them when its good with your partner. Thank you Auntie Jackie

[@wanjiru93]

right, i had a friendship go down the drain coz a friend is now some out married.

[@cutebrwnsknma]

I don’t agree..it goes both ways.

[@TreasureChest0806]

Been thru this several times!

[@teleah34]

Facts

[@Lhickson227]

No lies were told. Also pay attention to your “best friends” who show no excitement for you. Friendships def change, and you were 100% right , never ask for advice from ppl who don’t have the relationship you would want to have as well.

[@TiTaughtYou]

Re: Humility- 🗣 “BLACK WOMEN DONT OWE YOU THAT” yassssssssssss Jackie!

[@nikasmall3777]

I would love an elaboration on this.

[@iamabusinesscece8997]

I just want to take a second to say thank you for the years of commitment to slaying and your platform. You literally taught me how to do make up and I am soo thankful for you!!

[@jackieaina]

thankful for YOU!!!! 🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎

[@sphinxkitty4951]

As a fellow Capricorn I can say this comment is 100% on the 💰 😂

[@vanessapadilla4095]

Sdiejj es u ui

[@kalynnwillis1304]

I appreciate the “be ready”! I had a boyfriend for 2 years and just this past Tuesday I learned he had a whole other girlfriend for 3 years. If I didn’t keep my mental and emotional love for myself i would be depleted. I stayed ready meaning I always knew I’d be okay without him. $cheeseelbow

[@Veve1014]

If I understand correctly you dated him for two years and he had another girl for three years. If that’s true then it’s fucked up you were fine before him and you’ll be fine after him always remember that.

[@Toya2529]

👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿❤️💕

[@christy7516]

Oh my word. God have mercy ! This hurts

[@kalynnwillis1304]

@@Veve1014 you are very correct and I will be. It just sucks how people can say they love you and not mean it…

[@kalynnwillis1304]

@@christy7516 yes! It does.

[@corybaxter]

Two things spoke to me: 1. The whole lesson in not telling everyone my business is so important to me! My family calls me secretive all the time just for simply not giving them the deepest details about my relationship with my boyfriend. I used to wonder if I was being overly private, but now I realize that I simply ain't gotta tell everybody everything! 2. THAT WHOLE LINE ABOUT NOT HAVING TO BE RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING! That truly gathered me! I have a serious issue with being right and I'm learning to work on it. Great video as usual, Jackie! $CharmenYoung

[@GordonRamseyIsMyLifestyle]

omg corey baxter??

[@corybaxter]

@@GordonRamseyIsMyLifestyle 👀

[@cococherrymango1225]

Ugh this whole Comment omggggg. $munecameow

[@jackieaina]

Come on Cory wit da cliff notes!!!

[@julianacheriza1575]

That’s none of their business !! Your not being secretive

[@corneliathefifthya7452]

I learned the hard way to keep my relationships private from family, that lesson was most definitely learned properly. I used to think I owed people information thinking it equals authenticity but you can be authentic and private

[@iameloho718]

This came just in time 💕 I know how hard it can be to give advice nowadays so thank you Jackie!

[@latoya38]

Oh yes

[@roxywyndham]

Eloho ❤️

[@ogenglishchat9502]

Eeeyyyy, another black queen is watching.😘

[@ToyaB...]

"You don't have to win every battle" a simple okay and walk away... But walk away with a good eye roll. Lol

[@cococherrymango1225]

This is SO hard for meeeee

[@butterjujunut]

I can't stand this but also I need to start doing this because I'm forever in a fight in my head 😂

[@katkatkat5]

Yes try your best to see each other’s side and compromise when possible. But sometimes it’s simply not possible and you have to be able to just move on and agree to disagree. Like do you rather wanna be right or do you rather wanna be happy?

[@cococherrymango1225]

@@katkatkat5 wow. This was amazing . Thank you so much

[@goldengarnet]

@@butterjujunut me! I had to stop doing that. Sometimes it’s still a semi struggle, but I care more about being happy in my relationship than fighting

[@tinytaz6668]

I’ve been with my man for nearly 30 years, and I just wanted to say, everything you said today was exactly right. Even when you are at a different stage in life than a friend, it doesn’t mean that at some point your lives won’t get in sync in the future. Like, not gelling with friends who have babies, but in the future, who better to go to for advice, when you have a baby, than an experienced parent?

[@sharissev]

“Don’t tell your friends your business!” A WORD! Even when they mean well, their bias can definitely lead you astray. Needed that one!! $SharisseV

[@shalondriaficklin3098]

"Don't abandon your friends! Stop getting into relationships and forgetting everyone else exists". Whew...I needed this advice at 19. I got married at 21, was abused and isolated. I learned the hard way, but my God, did I learn! $Shalondria20

[@ilovesilver205]

As a woman who has close to 20 years of marriage experience, I support this message 💜💜

[@jessicalynn8746]

Compliment each other, tell your significant other how handsome they are or beautiful they are or how much you appreciate the things they do. I noticed people tend to get comfortable and forget the little things that make their partner feel appreciated, wanted, loved ya know. My husband and I compliment each other every day.

[@bellaapple2166]

Great advice 💓

[@kclovie]

I’m a teenager, but ima soak all this in like a sponge and remember all this when I become older. Thank you 🥰!

[@cococherrymango1225]

Soak it in baby

[@inaayahthomas1233]

Thisss

[@kathleencook7477]

Yaasss! Soak it in. Every lesson does not have to be experienced. You can learn from other peoples mistakes, misfortunes, misunderstandings, and misguidedness 😏🤣 Wisdom =knowledge applied

[@isiimhanbor2088]

Keep your relationship private,Also don’t abandon your single friends, As a married person you can still relate with your single friends on topics outside marriage. $NurseIsi

[@kathleencook7477]

True that! You have to know your friends!

[@katiedollard1372]

Great advice! "Keeping your friends close" is a huge one for me! I've had friends get into relationships, stop seeing their friends, and when the relationship ends, they regret letting their friends go. So yes, please stay in touch for your friends! I love my man, but I always cherish my girl time. Honestly, I sometimes forget this until I see my girls, but seeing them is so important to me! Thanks for sharing your advice, Jackie! Love you! 💕

[@dionysus9876]

Jackie, I really appreciate you pointing out keeping up appearances in relationships. That is the journey I am on right now, I want to bring a full put together self to a relationship (physically, emotionally, and spiritually). Not just put on a facade to catch 'em and then pull some Wizard of Oz reveal trick, lol!

[@meli685]

Love it! It’s not selfishness it’s self preservation

[@rozzyhomemaker]

“Don’t tell your parents your business.” That’s the one right there. Learned that the hard way because my family is rude or die for real!! They’ll cut you off in a heartbeat. Now I keep it to myself! $RozzyJHunt

[@BriaBarrows]

For real.

[@ToniOlaoye]

JACKIE!! I really enjoyed this video💓💓.

[@gglewis1718]

💯💯💯

[@nayilicious03]

The last statement was everything for me. You don’t have to respond to everything, and that goes for relationship, friendships, your mother, anyone. Sometimes, a simple hmmmm will do! Loved the video! $Orvenie

[@ramiak.602]

I definitely agree with you when you said “don’t tell your parents or friends every time you & your significant other have a disagreement” !!!! It’s so true because just because y’all have moved on from the disagreement, your friend or parent will always remember it. $ramiakai

[@MCruz424]

You hit the nail on the head with all of these lessons (IMO of course). Too often people tell their family and friends way too much of their everyday relationship issues and it gets to a point where they can't let what they've been told go and side eye the person forever. Privacy is a HUGE non negotiable I. My relationship. I don't have cash app only venmo but whoever the winner is. Congratulations!!!

[@ambernicoletv8189]

"Not every argument is worth fighting" - that was a gem. I love watching Jackie, and I was watching simply to support, so imagine picking up something like that! I'm actively working on this now and I love how this was broken down in the video. Don't take everything personally - sometimes it's okay to walk away. Thanks Jackie

[@MoniseSeward]

Ok. When you said that you like for him to go out so you can have alone time...I felt that. People try to make you feel bad for needing time to yourself, even in a relationship. I'm happy for you. I'm glad you reached the point where you realized what went wrong in other relationships and what you wanted to get right this time!! $MoniseSeward

[@KeishaDiamonds713]

My tip I LOVE: don’t tell anyone what you will be embarrassed for them to repeat

[@rajaharrison411]

I FELT when you said keep your friends and family out of your business! That’s a concept I’m trying to learn now because I understand their concern, but they’ll never understand, or even try to understand, my stance on continuing to deal with a person. Also, I recently lost a close friend because I asked her to stop telling me about her relationship problems. I had to set a boundary and ended up losing her in the process.

[@gracealanskas5968]

Love what you said about needing a partner who values conflict resolution! So important, super unbalanced when one partner keeps fighting when the other tries to move on.

[@kerrian2731]

Will this wedding ever happen though?

[@htduncan1]

As much as I love seeing you and Denis together, I have always loved how private you truly are. A cute picture, a quipped caption, and that's IT. And that's all people should really ever want. Yall are couple goals, through and through. $HTylerDuncan

[@CassandraRelynn]

I've been married 25 years and THIS was a chat I needed 25 years ago! It's taken me many years to realize that there's so much truth and power in this video! Now let me light this "Cuffing Season candle and get on track for 25 more years of growth and building! Love you! $cassandrarelynn

[@jasminecanfly]

My mom also gave me the “don’t tell your parents or all of your friends your relationship issues” and even when I tell her TINY sheriff, she sided with my husband EVERY. TIME. 😂

[@Jenigh734]

Don't tell your friends your business is the MF TRUTH. It makes people too comfortable being negative towards your partner, esp if it's over something that can be resolved. $kjenipher

[@samanthawhite3413]

Jackie I seriously LOVED this video!!!! My bf is a leo and I am a pisces, opposite of you and your fiance! Anyways alllll of these tips were so helpful especially about realizing your partner cannot be EVERYTHING you need. I'm working on being okay with that and building myself up and my personal toolbox so I can show up better in the relationship.. if you see this, thank you again for the perspective and GRWM chats

[@glowbynana]

Guys who amplify any arguments are the worst...even when you try to resolve it...they just keep bringing it up...love the look and enjoyed this talk💕

[@shatimaclark55]

“Not every battle is worth fighting” Literally hit home for me. Im in my season of maturing and transforming and this is a big piece of my transformation. Not only with my boyfriend but my platonic relationships as well as within myself. Thx for always helping auntie, luv u❤️ $ShadedCo

[@n2xrcise]

Jackie, I've been married, divorced and back in a long term relationship and couldn't agree with you more about picking your battles and learning when to just walk away. My bestie calls it "the art of shutting up"! Not every argument, conversation or discussion requires you to be "right", it can just BE! TFS $n2xrcise

[@SaplingTarot]

"Not all battles have to be won" is the best advice for all relationships, keeping score is really unhelpful. My only personal caveat is if the other person isn't in that with you, if they're pulling you up left, right and centre and you're always rising above it can build a resentment that is really hard to come back from.

[@JCamilleable]

That’s so nice of you to shoutout Youkey. Love her. This was such a good video. I love these videos I would love to see more lifestyle stuff if you felt like sharing that.

[@jacesey1024]

JACKIE…. That last Comment… I got chills! Everyone doesn’t understand that you have to truly pick your battles!!!! OMG… the “rather cuddle” part Jackie!!! Please please please tell the people!!!! And thank You AGAIN 🙌🏽🥰

[@newmank0217]

That “me” time is so important. Especially when children get added to your life. You’ll need time away from your spouse AND them kids! And it’s not a bad thing. It’s as necessary as air and water.

[@infinitetrio5664]

Finding someone who knows how to resolve conflict rather than amplifying it!! 🙌🏾 That was good enough to eat! 😩 You’re still one of the ones I love watching on here! 😍😍 $Shaneicela

[@tiara945]

definitely needed this. especially about not telling your friends everything!

[@cindyrendezvous5035]

Didn’t think I needed to see this but I did!! Privacy is the key 🔑 I have lost a lot of friends because I wouldn’t tell them all my business about my man. Literally… For a long time I thought I was the weird one for being that way but looking back, I’m glad I was 🤫 Love ya Jackie!

[@Bribear1977]

Seriously, you give SUCH good advice. I could relate to a lot that you talked about, relationship-wise, and you were 100% accurate. I've been married and divorced and you outlined a lot of mistakes that I made, that I only realized after the fact. Thanks for being you and helping others so much ❤

[@tashataylor8242]

I thought I was the only one that loved some alone time. It's a great reset for me. 😊

[@free2travel145]

I have always said have a separate bank account just in case and everybody said that’s messed up and I’m like “you don’t know who this person is in 10,20yrs” it doesn’t mean you think they would be crazy but just don’t be naive.

[@julianacheriza1575]

Heavy on this!!!!!!!

[@karenpayne7842]

Love this talk. I do feel like my ex-husband wanting to continue to hang out and drink all the time help contribute to our downfall. Because I was past that phase and he wasn't. Please do more of these videos ❤

[@Daniacastelo]

My relationship is getting more serious and sometimes because of society I feel like a don't want to be married cause people make it like you lose yourself or something. Thanks for the video it really made me feel like it's ok

[@dominiquehenderson4107]

Omg you’ve literally dropped so many gems! I really valued what you said about not arguing with your spouse when it’s little things that you’ve already know you’re right about! With me being 27 this is something I have now learned that has helped so much in my relationship. Thanks so much for the video!

[@oliviagladis8864]

what I’ve stuck by is staying true to you and growth is so so important, whether it ends up being with that person or without them

[@nc3919]

Auntie Jackie has blessed us this evening! Thank you!

[@MaryKBella]

"I don't want nothing to change." Chile, you don't want to be married, sis! And that's ok!

[@jasminejonesthegreat]

Not only are you beautiful but you always have SUPER meaningful conversations with us & game to hip us to!! I love it & Im here for it !! THANK YOU.

[@renewedgyrl]

Jackie--thank you for saying what you said about dynamics and relatability! It’s ok not to be interested in what doesn’t edify you, but many people see it as selfish and being a “hater” if you don’t want to talk about kids and marriage if you are single.

[@A.uthenticshe]

Let’s just talk about how much I love you and value your honesty and transparency. You’re one of the few influencers in my opinion that embody humility, kindness, and honesty. Love you Jackie!❤️

[@princessvia888]

I was the friend that stopped hanging with my friends when I was in a relationship, and revolved my life around him. I was only 16, but I’m still recovering from decisions I made for him now at 27. Please be kind to yourselves, everyone

[@SKSolaris]

What really resonated with me was "Stop getting into relationships and forgetting everyone exists" -- It's been a year after my 4.5 yrs co-dependent relationship (on both sides) has been over and I was guilty of neglecting friends and family for them. Even not giving myself some quality me time. Now that I'm over on the other side (of the emotional heartache, honestly thought that fool was the "one") I am doing better and also pampering myself because I realized I don't have to wait around for someone to do so. -- I am a fan of your content for many years and I feel this video really hit home -- not enough people talk about the SELF -- THANK YOU!

[@dolapoo.7896]

“Real g’s move in silence like Gbemi.” I cannot, only Jackie 😂🇳🇬

[@aaliyahlovesyou97]

Most of the topics you touched on in this video are so real and you typically don't learn these hard lessons until you are placed in the situation. Learning not to tell every problem to your friends and family is something I learned the hard way and ruined the relationship ultimately. Thank you for always staying true to yourself, your thoughts and morals, despite what society has to say about it. You are one of my role models! Love you Jackie! $aleahmills

[@zumbelololol]

The whole “just walk away, but fr WALK AWAY” is sooooo important! I feel like when you’re upset and you try to relay information all your partner picks up is your tone or body language and then they’re all offended because of how you’re speaking to them and not picking up what your saying. Taking that moment to walk away, collect your thoughts and then calming bringing it back up later when you’re ready to have the convo is huge! $fatimaburgess1996

[@samanthajoy1]

Agree with EVERYTHING! That’s how you create a healthy relationship and boundaries between all parties.

[@traci.cherie.18]

I am learning not to share my relationship with others. The more they know the more they judge. I'm also learning not to talk bad about my partner evening when venting.

[@beinfinefeather205]

Not losing yourself your friends your independence and keeping your business private. Those things are so important snd she nailed that topic. because going into a almost 20 year relationship (15 married) it took me years to learn some of those things and sometimes when you try to regain that it can be tricky transitioning because your partner isn't necessarily used to it

[@laurendark7798]

GALLBLADDERS!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I love it! And as a married mother, please take the initiative to talk about topics, life events, and feelings relevant to your single friends. Not everything is about you! If they can make an effort to congratulate you and inquire about a life they don’t relate to, you can do the same for them. Just my thought. ❤️ $LaurenDark

[@Psychonaut2014]

"Just walk away, but fr walk away" is a word. Still practicing this, but makes such a difference when I actually follow through! $Gholschbach

[@TaneshaSunflower]

Jackie is actually wise beyond her years. The relationship advice is on point. Especially the part about not letting everyone know your business, because it's none of their business 💯. $TaneshaLonergan

[@2glamgal]

I loved the concept of “keeping some things to yourself” - it’s nice to know that my boyfriend is there for me, however, having some things I do by myself and thing I keep to myself makes me stay sane and not wrapped up only in my relationship. This includes hobbies that I enjoy that he doesn’t, I love doing them alone. $CateraG

[@AbiAbss]

That last point was soooo accurate for me! I do not enjoy arguing one bit so being with someone who seems to always want to drive home their point and be right all the time at the cost of trying to get to a solution to make our relationship stronger was literally torture for me.

[@missislandgirl16]

This couldn’t have come at a better time. Thank you Jackie! This was a nice reminder to always remain true to yourself even in a relationship.

[@goldadido]

I’ve been married for almost 5 years and I still remind myself that not everything deserves an argument or even a response. Choosing peace for my own sake is so much healthier. If it won’t matter in 2 weeks or a month, I’m not wasting my energy addressing it. $GoldaNg

[@tyishastephen]

So true!

[@MeghanF93]

Oooh and I just got my pajamas on too! Time to snuggle into bed and watch Jackie ☺️

[@doggykins7777]

You are creating a new standard of women putting them self first!! Ugh thank you

[@AnnekaMaquay]

Gospel Jackie! I too am a firm believer at keeping many things mysterious. I used to ALWAYS ask others for advice and would get a million different “you should’s” which then caused so much confusion. I’d say “self… what does Anneka want”. Had to face MY reality because I’m the one healing + dealing. Loved our girl chat. 🤗 $annekamaquay

[@MakedaMutemaNewton0324]

"I'm only talking about the black owned brands so stay mad!" Funny! But lots of great advice here, Jackie.

[@Dwina87]

When you realize your significant other is on the same team as you, you also realize that being right pales in comparison to having peace. Definitely gotta choose your battles, respect each other’s boundaries and operate from a place of love at all times. Awesome video Jackie. Enjoyed it! - $EdwinaBazile

[@sgpoet47]

My therapist said something you reassured me about. People change and so do friendships. Love you Jackie A. You have taught me so much about make up 💜🖤

[@reece_iam4682]

Hey girl, I’m 37 years young and I met my husband when I was 16 and was married just before my 19 birthday. How 21 yrs have been the best years ever is never stop communicating with one another also, never stop dating your spouse. Much love from Arizona

[@shalisaperoonline]

I "lost" friends last year when I got in a healthy and happy relationship and they really were not happy for me. Sadness. Sometimes it takes such a thing to happen to see that misery loves company.

[@nicoles_vault]

I loved this video. “Maintain my self-identity” and “choosing my battles” were my takeaways. ❤️

[@salemafangideh560]

I love these types of internet big sister advice videos Jackie!! I guess I just want to push back on the “not telling your single friends” things point of view. From my perspective I’m the single friend who loves love and values intimacy so when my girls talk about some of the challenges they encounter in their relationship it’s easy for me to gently show them their own errors. I think it’s important to have single friends who can be honest with you about their own challenges finding intimacy to give the partnered friend perspective. And the way I do friendships it’s for life so just journeying through each life season with my girls is important to me. I know when I’ve been partnered it’s been helpful to talk to people who can be radically honest with me regardless of their relationship status at the time because they know me deeply. Anyways I do get what you mean though about learning to process on your own sometimes not always running to parents & friends to take on that discomfort - but also having people you can talk to when you need to be checked lovingly lol. $SalemAfangideh ❤️

[@breannadavis99]

Sis hit me when she said "you dont have to always win the fight" oowwweee lord. This is something I am trying to learn now lol.

[@sincerelydaj2805]

I felt it when you were talking about keeping your friends and family out your business! It’s something I have been practicing within my relationship because 1, I want to protect it because I cherish him and our relationship, so I’d rather keep outside opinions far away. 2, I’ve had way more peace moving that way! Loved this content Jackie 💖 $dasjahm

[@xzx6947]

Loveeeee that you mentioned that even when u know you’re right you don’t need to fight till you have the last word!! Facts! Cuddles over last petty word 😂😂😭

[@Alice-qn8to]

Never tell people more than they need to know, because they start to build an expectation that you should tell them everything-accountability partners right there! I think influencers/celebrities especially experience this bc once they show you a snippet of their lives suddenly the audience think they have a right to know everything 🤣 like have a bit of decency please anyways thanks for the timely advice Jackie 🥰👏

[@tommiephoenix]

This was fantastic advice. I learned the hard way this year that your relationship is NOBODYS BUSINESS but yours and your partner’s. You can choose to share how much or how little you desire with ur friends and family (it’s never too late to put up that boundary) but I have learned that 99 if not 100% of the time those friends (especially the single onesss) you’re taking to are either gonna a. PROJECT or b. protect. And neither of those are conducive to a solution to whatever problem u have cuz they will never be in your relationship!!!!!!!! Second best advice I ever got was don’t bring up every little shit that bothered you to your partner. Take your time processing (journal, therapy etc) to see if you actually care or if you’ll get over it. And if it ain’t a red flag, don’t take it so far as an argument. It’s not worth your peace to be right 🤷🏾🤷🏾🤷🏾 it’s just not!!

[@ellerymitchell2521]

Girl when I say the train station I’m at got spooked from the way I screamed at not every battle is worth having?! You might not be a therapist but you could be a psychic cuz that’s what I needed to here at this moment

[@phalondahayes3981]

everything you said from the keep yall business yall business and not telling friends and loved ones everytime yall have a disagreement!! especially the dont let go of your friends! I...for one had to learn that lesson. I had the mindset that once I was married my circle should mainly be made up of married folks and my single friends had to take a distant back seat and when me and him divorced (thankfully) I still had a handful I could turn to but your points were spot on!!

[@adwoatumtum]

*47 Minutes!?!? Yes!! I have my snacks* 😍 *Update: there is a black screen and no video from **31:39** to **41:12*

[@carlenesamuel5209]

I was about to ask about this

[@IreneH1214]

I was wondering if I was the only one who had that

[@Sen_Padba3]

"Don't tell everyone everything" and "move in silence" is the only advice I've ever given out.

[@Mscursed2]

I love how this was a video on how to preserve yourself

[@DeShanitaD]

Not telling your friends or family your business is something I had to learn the hard way. It can give off toxic vibes sometimes when they continue to bring it up when your significant other is brought up. $DeShanita