Things you wouldn't hear in a medical show | Mock the Week - BBC

[@Yoctopory]

"We'll be starting the procedure by numbing your breasts. NUMNOMNUMNOMNUMNOM!" - I died XD

[@CraneProductions27]

Great jokes here. But Andy Parson's joke at 1:39 made me laugh so much. 'Look! No Hands!' :D :D :D

[@jupiter3io523]

@Crane Engine Productions - I’ll be honest, I don’t understand that joke.

[@cynicalpenguin]

@@Louise-fv7rb "Everything's funny except the things that offend me specifically. They shouldn't be allowed"

[@cynicalpenguin]

@@jupiter3io523 How can you not understand it... none of his fingers are inside which means his penis is.

[@seldonwright4345]

I expected that one

[@Me-fo1kk]

I couldn't help notice HIS GROIN.

[@brain_apostrophe_t]

🎶 "the neck bones connected to the foot-bone! The footbones connected to the eye-ball!" 🎶

[@beneze3286]

Holland Kerr yess!!

[@Scy]

gimme the defribbilator, im'a defrib somthen.

[@loljk233]

+Scy Thank you! I had no idea what he was saying...

[@pearkore6821]

The Jeremy Hunt jokes are always relatable, as Australia's Health Minister is named Greg Hunt.

[@kylestubbs8867]

Is it just the last name? Or is "Greg" interchangeable with "Jeremy"?

[@beeble2003]

@@kylestubbs8867 It's just the last name.

[@jetfire851]

Things you wouldn't hear on an American medical show: "It's lupus"

[@TheRealRehman]

Except for that one time

[@rrss5497]

God Almaighty, Dougal, it's never lupus!

[@HarryNicNicholas]

is there a doctor in the house?

[@tanukiman3855]

“I’m afraid we’re going to have to refer you to Monsoon Poultry Hospital.”

[@TheRealXboxNerd]

My entry: "Welcome to Embarrassing Bodies, where you can come to talk about problems you wouldn't even tell your family members, but are perfectly happy to have broadcast on national television"

[@No2024name]

TheRealXboxNerd I

[@daisybates7054]

My sister's godmother produces that show

[@applejuice5272]

0:36 🤣 "I think we've got the balance about right: the hospital is clean but the nurses are filthy."

[@NFFC1610]

this week on embarasing bodies... FIFA 😂😂

[@khalilokhal5398]

Hugh got something for the nurses🤣🤣 I swear this the third nurse joke from 3 different episode 🤣🤣

[@Kanbei11]

I'm Dr Crispin and I am always here

[@haynus9568]

my entry don't worry what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.. except your polio

[@gottistzukurz]

The numbing breast one was my favourite!! ^^ nom nom nom nom nom... :D

[@speckledjim9895]

I tried that one on my attractive neighbour yesterday, my court case is next week.

[@ibadatsidhu81]

@@speckledjim9895 hahahaha

[@HarryNicNicholas]

@@speckledjim9895 try wayaying them instead.

[@rcm926]

What is your blood type? A? I said what is your blood type? O. B. I don't know where this joke is from, does anyone else know?

[@jackbarlow2280]

Robert Medd Stephen Fry's monologue called The Letter

[@typacsk]

"Positive?"

[@farmingace1015]

Brooklin 99 I think

[@rcm926]

@@farmingace1015 No, the first guy was right

[@chapmag6578]

..... 40 words a min, innit bruv.....

[@Master_Petes_Theater]

From Rodney Dangerfield: "I went to my doctor's and he told me he wanted a semen sample, a urine sample and a stool sample." "So, I took off my trousers and handed him my underwear!" Miss you Rodney, and bless the creators of Mock the Week! 😂👍

[@AlexBlexAleb]

ramesh milton and dennis really were funny in this episode

[@jaggass]

''Did you know that i suffer from constipation?. No shit!''

[@ouroboroskay1149]

1:05 oh God am weak 😂😂😂😂

[@Maximillian-Tiberius-Rex]

Miltons Tombola joke creased me up

[@kjamison5951]

My entry: “Hello, Tracey, I’m Doctor Stevens. You have acute appendicitis.” “Ooh! Does it have a dimple?”

[@bubu1066]

This week on one born every minute, a patient gives birth to Micheal Crawford. Apparently some mother's do have em

[@jackfortey282]

hello im Dr christian, and these are my colleagues Dr jewish and Dr muslim

[@dciwaldo1412]

Ok let me just take a loo… OH MY GOODNESS HAHAHAHA WHAT EVEN IS THAT

[@JJB88-y9v]

Things you wouldn't hear on a American medical show We'll get you fixed up before we check your wallet 😂

[@Nootathotep]

what about: 'don't worry, it's perfectly safe, let me hide stand behind the lead screen'

[@1hedge1hog]

Who’s the woman, she’s hilarious

[@almostfm]

Holly Walsh.

[@aaronhurst4379]

That FIFA joke just ages better and better

[@megansutton8575]

Some of these are so bad, but oh so good! :)

[@Minair-m1k]

0:48 Ironically the question was, “unlikely things to be said on a medical show”. I know for a fact this joke for numbing was made on Scrubs

[@Algahiem]

My entries: "Now unfortunately, this life-saving brain surgery will impede the patience's mental faculties, but on the plus side, it'll make him easier to control." "IN THE NAME OF OUR LORD, JESUS CHRIST, I COMMAND THAT THIS DEMON TO LEAVE THIS MAN'S APPENDIX!!! CAN I GET AMEN, BROTHERS AND SISTERS!?!" "After being burnt alive and having all my limbs severed, the surgeons were able to replace my arms and legs with artificial limbs and I was given a portable life support machine to keep me alive and wouldn't be standing here if It was for Emperor Palpatine."

[@BadWebDiver]

All gold!

[@heyysimone]

I love Rob

[@jaggass]

''This patient has had a heart attack after reading his medical bill''

[@sherrieanderson505]

My entry: ''No no, I've been doing this for 12 years, HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT?!"

[@jaggass]

''''That's not classed as a second opinion when you ask the same doctor again about your condition''

[@blueben3946]

next up is embarrassing bodies, or as some like to call it, the Tory party broadcast

[@gracereads2917]

Pissing myself

[@patriciamcgeorge2575]

funnily enough, you may well hear all of these on a medical drama

[@philipcheyne6420]

Looking forward to the episode =)

[@thengp12]

The buzzer sounds weird.

[@Chebab-Chebab]

'Hello, I'll be your surgeon for this operation. Um, nurse,could you notify the priest?' 'HELLOOOOOOO... (hellooo). My, your vagina is massive' 'I'd like to begin with a prayer...'

[@chrisgarton4225]

It’s just a flesh wound! It’s just a flesh wound!

[@IlGreven]

An Americentric entry: "Well, sorry to say, you have TB. Which is really bad news for your moderate to severe plaque psoriasis."

[@jaggass]

This next patient we're about to show is severely obese. He weighs 150kg and suffers from type 2 diabetes but lets not sugarcoat that just incase he decides to eat it''

[@jaggass]

''After Cheryl Fernandez Versini gave birth to a baby boy. We can report that both the baby and Liam Payne are doing very well''

[@kaarel545]

2:43 After this joke look up Chris Pratt Kim Kardashian on KZbin for a great cumback story!

[@lostkin4910]

My entry: No, no, no wait a second. Let's just see what happens first.

[@subject_6_6_6_5]

what about " and the lines are now open place your vote in who you want to lose a limb or who u want to stay whole"

[@ep4everlegend317]

Andy parsons and hugh Dennis are just legends of mock the week.... Rob Beckett I just don't find funny...

[@martinwilliamrandall]

Things you wouldn't hear on Mock the Week: Andy Parsons a comedy genius & its just as funny as it ever was during the Frankie Boyle era!

[@owenlfc228]

Because FIFA is like a governing body

[@eclectica1]

Things you never read about in a Mock The Week KZbin comments section: People not bitching about Frankie Boyle because they're not precious, repetitive fucks who can't move on.

[@rocketraccoon77]

I think Frankie would have killed this one.

[@cameronchristensen6781]

Funny comment. Sex/nudity joke. Rinse and Repeat.

[@maxconner5204]

No Doctor Who jokes really. those were the first ons that came inmind

[@parkerproductions4546]

My line: "Eating a healthy, balanced and nutritional diet is what many of us overlook and need to implement in our life- *looks at watch* OH good its my lunch break, McDonalds here I come!!"

[@jaggass]

''Next up on America's biggest loser Richard Simmons''

[@rizandro]

How is Richard Simmons a loser? Have you seen him on Whose Line?

[@jaggass]

Its a double meaning as in weight loss or a loser.

[@SuperMarioDWfan]

Lol!

[@ReginaldBWilson]

Don't get the FIFA joke

[@MrWillisle]

FIFA is the governing body of football/soccer. And it's really embarrassing.

[@ReginaldBWilson]

ok... still nothing dude!

[@LSArocks]

TheAnnihilatorGamer because FIFA are clueless :)

[@ReginaldBWilson]

ah ok

[@mazeppa1231]

TheAnnihilatorGamer It's a governing body of football and it's really embarrassing because of all sorts of corruption and stuff like that involved by them, especially by the main executives.

[@melissacaisley23]

great jokes all around disliked for any and all of rob beckett's contributions

[@JamEngulfer]

He was funny though

[@uprightgrandpianokid]

What's with Milton's voice?

[@kjamison5951]

uprightgrandpianokid He just uses characterisations from time to time. He likes to get into the spirit of it all.

[@jonhay75]

Can someone explain why the female comedienne on this show is never funny...?

[@beeble2003]

Because you're a misogynist.

[@cereliafeiyin2560]

MtW really has gone to shit, where are Russel Howard and Frankie boyle.

[@reidphx]

Old jokes. Put in an American!