This is literally the worst timeline..

[@jesterlampoon-t1j]

- Mr. Beast got cancelled - P. Diddy got got - Asmond cleaned his room - Nikocado lost weight Now Chris Chan's got laid AND is having a kid... The 2020's have been WILD so far.

[@ILikeGuns1992]

Did anything actually happened to Mr Beast? There was a lot of drama but did he suffer any consequences? His channel is still up and going, right? Sponsors didn't left him either?

[@Borderose]

​@@ILikeGuns1992MrBeast hasn't really fallen. But he has lost that aura of invincibility and authenticity that he used to have. Sure he doesn't fake most of his stuff, but it is being directed, produced, and edited. His content is basically TV now. And after the whole Eva/Chris debacle and Dogpack releasing those videos exposing how the sausages get made, a lot of people soured on him.

[@OWnIshiiTrolling]

Chris Chan got laid before, but his last boyfriend free girl couldn't get pregnant due to her age. The child thing is so much worse. That kid has no chance.

[@ClockworkBees]

2024 has been the year of KZbin’s Olympic tumbling routine.

[@TheMastertbc]

what happens next spoiler warning donald trump becomes astronaut and shoots himself to the moon

[@Zel_eo]

I feel like this is how BloodBorne bosses are made...I fear for this world

[@Vanzgars]

CRYSTAL, ORPHAN OF CHRIS

[@IloveJellow]

that be so funny if someone followed him around and played the boss music every time he enters a store.

[@zel3079]

How come we have similar usernames?

[@interessiertermatheschuler8405]

Ah, you were at my side all along. My true mentor. My guiding medallion.

[@JojoJoget]

Nah they aren’t that degenerate

[@grimngruesome8988]

Finnish girl: "I can fix him" *Chooses the most difficult option available*

[@itsyvonblitz6819]

Well the Fins have always been hardcore. They're the type of fromsoft players to play with a potato and do a no-hit marathon of every game back to back. Guess that applies to relationships too

[@littleluxia]

Gurl no you can't!

[@gatsbygoodwood2575]

I am now in a timeline where I can’t get a lady and Chris Chan can after all he has done. It might be time to call it a day and officially end it all chaps…

[@DuBstep115]

​@@itsyvonblitz6819As a Finnish person, we are sorry. We should have stopped her

[@BackseatGamingJesus]

If the Fins can take on the USSR then maybe they can take on Chris Chan

[@divineautismo]

That child is not safe.

[@Ayo-gc5oh]

Who? The wife or the future kid

[@Woogoo336]

Both are in danger. Going all in with a deranged s*x offender is wild.

[@divineautismo]

@ Hahaha yeah I had to look twice the first time I saw her 😬😬

[@erikguillen6599]

Two possibles paths. 1.- Sonichus avatar woke up from their sh*tty lifestance. 2.- He kills the finnish kid and their newborn and memes go too much dark in the incoming times.

[@fizzbrew]

Agreed. Absolutely disgusting that the sweet child has to be around this freak.

[@slav999]

That girl just invented a whole new level of hating your father

[@Fankas2000]

10 bucks the kid will end up just as weird. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[@mikewhitfield2994]

lmao!

[@crazyfutureradio]

Even mayli couldn't top this

[@johnjack3578]

You are so dad obsessed that you literally can't help yourself. Bringing daddies in everything, even unrelated context.

[@Anuyushi]

@@johnjack3578 They were talking about.... Chris Chan becoming a dad... And the girl that got with him having a child...

[@cokeycola9514]

"blessed be those who dont know" fucking took me out, because holy hell is that a true statement

[@BeyondDaX]

Only the amish don't know at this point among other people living outside the internet.

[@madmatt2024]

@@BeyondDaX I've been online since 2002 and while I've probably heard the name before, I still didn't know anything about this person. Now I know why, they simply aren't worth knowing about.

[@pabloulloa2091]

I don't know, and after this I will make sure I never know more

[@Kami-Sama197]

@@madmatt2024 i didnt know about this guy till now lmao and its just a lame criminal why is there so much spotlight on him lmao

[@legoshiuwu7427]

Thank the lord for the blessing of ignorance in this case

[@SavantPete]

This kid is going to have life sent on the highest difficulty for no reason 😅

[@DandySusano]

no hit elden ring run all dlc bosses at level 1 type of difficulty fr

[@Official_RetroMania]

The child is playing Rayman 1 from start to finish, blindfolded, with only 1 life and with a broken controller.

[@NE-oj4be]

@@Official_RetroMania FUCKING HELL LMAO

[@nattacka]

lion king on super Nintendo

[@ponjun3970]

Which has more difficulty? Chris' Child or P***rnstar children

[@augustusrembrandt2246]

as a Finnish man, I'm starting to doubt Finnish women's taste in men

[@seekertosecrets7618]

😬Damn.

[@Caydiem]

@greg-m3m It's always getting talked about when it comes to having the happiest citizens.

[@Caydiem]

@@Mike_Oxlong07 Finland ranks among the top countries in terms of average IQ.

[@Caydiem]

@@Mike_Oxlong07 Most if not all Fins are more intelligent than you.

[@birdmann9529]

Perkele my finnish brother

[@IamBarry]

Chris Chan not only got a girl, but got her pregnant? Peanut really was the anchor animal after Harambe died. We've shifted timelines again, -boys- Gentlemen.

[@lakesong7566]

deadpool has been working overtime to save us

[@SpACeCruizeR2o3]

U can save that boys stuff we are men 💪🏼💯🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲and we are Proud

[@bajocontinuo]

@@lakesong7566 deadpool is cringe and so is anything marvel, if you like that you are cringe and should be ashamed

[@mrleaf7195]

Nuts out for Peanut🥜

[@Do_It_Now_XD]

The Dimensional Merge is Back On, Boys!

[@Fivespark144]

I feel so fucking defeated after hearing this..

[@Cyberbro665]

I know right? How the hell did he get a cute Fin Girlfriend?

[@boglurker2043]

The truly weirdest part is she's not even in it for the clout. She's tried her hardest to remain anonymous and has zero presence in the CC community. This is the first time anyone has actually seen her.

[@casualweekday-ytshadowbang2469]

I was just fine not being aware of The Thing. For me it was just a made up story set in Antarctica. Not something real on the opposite side.

[@ilikelemons2197]

@@Cyberbro665 she is also mentally ill

[@BrightNexus410]

Aware 7tv emote, we won't even get to marry and have a home to reside in in our generation looks to be more possible.

[@astickofmercury]

What a terrible day to have eyes.

[@fallingnao3919]

and ears...

[@TheAsylumCat]

Leaving the ocean was a mistake.

[@TMind109]

And a brain

[@ChristianDLucas]

And a soul…

[@calmyflory]

666 likes seems appropriate

[@cobaltprime9467]

It’s the most horrifying thing I’ve ever heard. “Chris Chan has reproduced.” Those words have disturbed me more than anything. And I watch a lot of horror movies and documentaries about disturbing people and events. I can only hope CPS is called day one. As horrible as the foster care system is, being raised by wolves would be preferable to being raised by Chris Chan. It’s already going to be an uphill battle for the kid having his genetics. The spawn of Chris Chan is starting life with the worst possible background. Children of corn stars have a better chance at a normal life. Kids that have to live in a bubble will have it better. Crack babies will have less messed up genetics. May God have mercy on that child.

[@bigdot2355]

quit being a doomer. If corrupt politicians and serial killers can get away with their crimes then Chris Chan's child gonna make it. Unless he's the Vessel of Sonichu... We're F***

[@JakesFavorites]

We will watch your career with great interest.

[@biscuitboi3561]

The worst part of this situation is this reaction is not hyperbolic at all

[@ItsChevnotJeff]

North Korean kids having a better spawn than Chris Chan's is crazy

[@bimates2690]

Both are bad. Especially from the stories told by victims of cps. Chan should've been arrested and kept behind bars. Unfortunately, one will have to do unless someone else steps in to care for the child.

[@itsyahboidonnie]

The birth of a Chris Chan child is a sign of the end times

[@merowing8588]

So it's gonna be red calf or something. I mean, I'm not surprised, we are talking an interesting mix of genes for sure.

[@itsyahboidonnie]

@merowing8588 the child will be one of the four horseman

[@AppalachianMountaineer1863]

@@itsyahboidonnie”and I behold a pale horse whose rider’s name was Death” Death Chandler

[@ferdinand12390]

I wish

[@RDV333]

Chris Chan being the Antichrist is a believable plot twist at this point.

[@DisgustedAsmon]

Sensing father’s strange energy, the fetus fastens umbilical to neck and spins like its future depends on it.

[@Warzak77]

i laughed so hard for at least 1 min

[@BasicMaffs]

Fetus containing Henry Kissinger’s soul

[@bot0643]

never gonna happen, thats the new mortal vessel for the demon sonichu.

[@Boyahda]

Damn son lmao

[@camillosteuss]

It doth indeed! Heil to you, wise fetus! Go with Christ...

[@ahiowehfiowjit]

Talk about one of the worst Spawns in history. Your dad being Chris Chan. Wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

[@tickledeggz]

I dunno, I can think of a few million worse spawns, any where below the Sahara and east of Nigeria seems pretty atrocious conditions wise (although i am aware there ste still some areas of southern africa that are very naturally beautiful and are also much ore developed nations than the one you see on the charity appeals)

[@pineappleparty1624]

I wouldn't wish it on that mini van that cut me off in traffic.

[@JogadorLevel99]

LMAO

[@piotrswat169]

This will be the real Sonichu.Devil,red kid from Wukong,Sephiroth,Mephisto,Sauron and Voldemort all in one cursed child.

[@PrimetimeX]

I wouldnt wish that fate on ANYBODY. Not Putin, not Biden, not even Xi Jinping. Honestly not even Ted Bundy

[@ragmority]

It's over. Finland has fallen.

[@Кацап0]

It was never standing.

[@thisaccountdoesnotexist-69420]

@@Кацап0 But it was always cooler than Russia

[@WarningStrangerDanger]

​@@thisaccountdoesnotexist-69420Russia is literally cooler though 😅

[@billw.overbeck8913]

Finland keeps on taking Ls. Woke news establishments(YLE), joining NATO and chris chan

[@newt4050]

The world is cooked Armageddon is imminent

[@TrippingwithDari]

If you know anything about Chris-chan lore, he been claiming that God sent him visions in the form of dreams since 8years old he'll have a daughter named Crystal. and Chris been trying to have his "god-given daughter" since.. and even begged Meghan (from Meghan arc) to be with him to make the prophecy come true. Chris also eroticized Crystal in his comics as his "sister" in EARLY Sonichu comics... so chances are Chris would do something bad to his child if its a girl. if its a boy, he'll likely raise his son as a girl and name it Crystal, to make his prophecy come true. So things are going to get alot WORSE in Chris-chan lore.

[@Crow12619]

So the prophecy is coming true then. Is Chris the antichrist or somethig?

[@jamiearmstrong3487]

Chris' views on if he had a son, whilst buried, are proof of negligence. From his lego 'illness,' to certain 'arcs,' in the comics and real life, God I pray if that kid's born, its in Finland and their aware.

[@BeyondDaX]

and the drama channels are going to eat up the controversy like hot cakes for many years to come, the content is literally free

[@christoffer5875]

oh god no

[@greenquartz]

That's horrifying! I'd never heard of this guy before today and now I'm sad that I have. 😮

[@saltyk9869]

Guys. The world ended in 2012. This is Hell.

[@CSRT123]

100% agree.

[@despyro5140]

You're right. It is

[@Lord_Phoenix95]

So Skyrim was the last true goal?

[@TheDragonofRevelation]

If you think this is Hell, you ain't seen NOTHING. Pray that your God have mercy on your soul because I won't. 😈

[@littleluxia]

Dang it the Mayans were right all along!

[@barahng]

Imagine if Chris goes full tradpill and ends up as a normal man with a normal family. The most unexpected turn of events. 😂

[@jacobkohr7243]

Would it though. Would it really be that surprising after the insanity that has been 2024?

[@Mashamazzi]

​@@jacobkohr7243yes

[@randyross5630]

@@jacobkohr7243 Well if Chris is doing the Tradpill, I will take the Chris-Chanpill! And Transitioning into Chris Chan and be Trans Chris Chan...

[@hyruler036]

@@randyross5630 Sounds like you already got one foot through the door ngl

[@T-Ball-o]

Yeah, nah. She will be raising that tardlet all by herself. If he has any involvement it will be as child #2

[@Icetea-2000]

Chris-chan is literally the epitome of what people referred to as "don’t worry, these people won’t reproduce anyway"

[@timmycu]

and the worst thing is that they do reproduce in the end and the smart people that say that they don't, dont. 😅

[@Unknown-sz8kg]

"Just because you can have a kid, doesn't mean you should".

[@smithynoir9980]

Not sure there is a greater truth than that

[@heavyhebrew]

"In all your scientific glory, your technological marvel at what you could accomplish, you never asked yourself if you should even be doing this"

[@carljohan9265]

You know a while back there was a practice of sterilizing people who had illnesses that made them unfit parents/unable to take care of a child. People said it was wrong and abolished the practice. I'll let you decide if that was a bad call or not after seeing this.

[@EllisHudsonn]

@@SigmundIIIglad you made it in the end 🙏🏾

[@KalinajCrimer]

Asmongold: what's your excuse? Me: at this point in my life I don't know

[@stateofhibernation]

Felt 😂

[@EddieSpaghetti69]

Naw I don't tap barn or farm animals. People gotta have standards, this is pathetic.

[@Kingkongmental]

@@EddieSpaghetti69she doesn’t look like a farm animal

[@Vtr-fw5md]

Ahhh, probably ww3. Nuclear Armageddon for a change 😂

[@flowtekGG]

I feel you. I don't know who that weirdo is, only seen that thing two times here where baldie reacted to it. Now seeing that this thing has a gf, while I'm here single af while being relatively normal with a normal job. Yeah, it's hopeless I suppose. I don't know either.

[@FrenzyLive1]

Chris Chan got more documentaries than 9/11

[@dessertlocust]

he’s our 9/11

[@Official_RetroMania]

Chris Chan is also more popular than 9/11.

[@Viperness]

He gonna be "finnished".

[@verspin]

Understandable

[@Ye-Hu]

He's worse than 9/11

[@augustusrembrandt2246]

Every Finnish single man looks at this like: Maybe I'm not what they're looking for

[@jextra1313]

Inb4 Finns start "Chrismaxxing"

[@OneWayTwoBrazil]

Chris Chan shouldn’t legally be allowed to raise a child, surely.

[@thenonexistinghero]

Well, we all know what's gonna happen in a few years. Might be a dark statement, but it's pretty likely.

[@Mashamazzi]

Well he only rapes old ladies, so...

[@tickledeggz]

Well, even if Chris is determined to be incapable of doing so, we know nothing about the mother. Now I dont know very much about Finland in particular but I am aware that the Scandanavian countries are a lot better at taking care of their citizens than other euro nations and especially the USA. Chances are if Chris is truly unfit, the mother can get custody and he'll have access visits or even be allowed to live with them as long as proper safeguarding and support are in place (although again, I know fuckall about Finnish law)

[@ashash6866]

I mean, since he wasn't charged with what he did it sounds possible he can, unfortunately.

[@user-df4kf6fg7h]

There's no way Chris Chan could adopt, but if it's their own child then nothing can be done until the child protective services get an excuse to call mistreatment. If the "happy couple" stays in Finland though, then, if it's any consolation, their child protective services are pretty harsh.

[@thezeddy]

the marketing for the third sonic movie is getting bold

[@crimsonshinobi5281]

Hhaaahaaaha!

[@harrylarry6324]

Ah hell

[@pozkitt2326]

finally yeah

[@yeetyboi7496]

His child will be the villan in the fourth one

[@moglet12345]

Underrated comment

[@gzuz4148]

People thought cornstars having kids was bad But THIS is actually 100x worse

[@ricardohoang8452]

Worse in a thousand times

[@NiGHTS4life]

Please stop censoring.

[@Đanggiahuy006]

@@NiGHTS4lifethey have to or else KZbin will just delete their uncensored comment.

[@ha-itsme]

It's only worst because the internet makes his life "The Truman Show". He is just an average person you see at the gas station 3AM.

[@arafath1010]

I owe Lana Rhoades an apology

[@Woogoo336]

I feel so bad for that kid. The worst fate. I don't know how this dude isn't in a mental hospital.

[@bimates2690]

Or in jail. Preferably.

[@Sabertooth_54]

Bros kid is never winning a argument💀

[@jamiearmstrong3487]

"Your dad's gay." "Your not entirely wrong."

[@RDV333]

When he finds his dad's wiki he is gonna have a Jimmy Neutron Brain blast heard around the world.

[@paulofaquin]

@@RDV333 As long as he doesn't talk smack about sonichu, he's safe, he can calls his dad mommy and won't get in trouble.

[@parklife27]

@@RDV333 "Daddy, have you ever had grandma's consent?"

[@CaptainTitforce]

Or winning anything.

[@walterooski]

I cannot believe I live in a friggin' world where Chris Chan has a girlfriend and incoming child before I do.....

[@pollointerestelar7439]

You think he is fit to support a family? be proud of yourself for not speeding things up, getting a partner and a child is very easy, giving them a good life and being a good parent is what many fail at.

[@hisaceinthehole3426]

and a house to live in, presumably.

[@jamiearmstrong3487]

@@pollointerestelar7439 It's the fact the simple baseline has been reached.

[@davidrenton]

@@hisaceinthehole3426 -i have no idea who is, but i did see the video where he lives in a crummy motel it looked like

[@Bookworm214-y3d]

You can have a child with me =D

[@meledisu]

I'm glad everyone says "he" instead of "she".

[@littleluxia]

Because we live in reality, not lgbtvtopia

[@theredtechnician]

For Chris Chan I use whatever pronouns will annoy the person I'm speaking too.

[@gayusschwulius8490]

Chris is simply the most obvious example of AGP (autogynophilia) transsexualism one could think of, he doesn't legitimately experience dysphoria (which is a real and unfortunately incurable mental illness, just like autism or schizophrenia), he simply gets off on the thought of seeing himself as a woman. This kind of fetishized transsexualism is the one that's on the rise in recent years and most of the transsexuals who aggressively demand to be accepted and included despite not even remotely passing are AGPs. "Real" transsexuals that actually simply suffer from gender dysphoria are much quieter, try to hide that they're trans, usually like men (if we're talking MtF, that is) and mostly actually pass. There's also a huge overlap between autism and AGP; this whole push for transsexualism has basically turned half of the autistic male population into transsexuals, but that's a thing we're not allowed to talk about, now are we. My gf has a friend who's legitimately trans. She always behaved more like a girl, played with girls, fancied boys and basically looked like a girl as well. I'm willing to use "she"/"her" pronouns for people like that, simply because I know it means a lot to them and doesn't cost me anything. I'm not willing to play along with fetishists like Chris, though, who basically try to blackmail all the people around them to participate in their kink by pretending that they're women.

[@este_marco]

i think we should call it "it"

[@IrisJoens]

​@@este_marco "It/Hit" is actually the OG neutral term. "It's a boy!"

[@tuhkapussi987]

As a Finn, I am beyond embarrassed. We don't want Chris Chan here, thank you.

[@fudalefu1]

It’s proof Harambe was this universe’s anchor being. After we lost him, everything started going downhill.

[@kgb976]

We need another Harambe

[@BanishedSilentShadow3318]

​@kgb976 we had another Harambe, his name was peanut the squirrel and his friend Fred the Raccoon

[@kgb976]

@BanishedSilentShadow3318 😧

[@elgranmanco8201]

​@@BanishedSilentShadow3318 one More Horsemen... And We are fucked, Harambe, peanut and fred, one More and we are gona see... The genesis

[@skibidibiters]

Who's gonna be our anchor? If we already do then it's definitely not doing a great job

[@bos_outsider]

Imagine your daughter brings Chris Chan as her boyfriend in family dinner.

[@zahrans]

Perkele! 🤨

[@donseavey3704]

Honey? We have a daughter??

[@familhagaudir8561]

Police arriving after Chris goes from X0 to Game Over : ''we have to arrest you. but daaaamn''.

[@Metaphix]

I would turn into a stereotypical angry boomer dad. "No daughter of mine" haha fuck that.

[@Unknown-sz8kg]

"You are adopted" - parents

[@Hamael_Surk]

Man fuck this timeline,there's no salvation since Harambe bro

[@StevenSeagalGenius]

Dude I cried when the government killed harambe

[@Negi1001]

and now it's broken again thanks to Peanut.

[@peterbruck3845]

And the situation repeated ever since they killed that damn squirrel! Now Trump is president and we are living in the worst of the worst

[@gravemind883]

​@@peterbruck3845That is a bold strategy, being anti trump in this community?

[@Termintex-p7u]

chicks dig celebrities

[@jextra1313]

And bad boys.

[@maxbants7737]

Darwin rolling in his fucking grave.

[@xavierhouston4650]

Cain left Earth. Never has he seen such bs before.

[@jollypolly1686]

Eh why ? Survival of the fittest. Who's the fittest in clownworld ?

[@Khorothis]

@@jollypolly1686 Unfortunately, you have a point

[@potoo6122]

Darwinism is not real at this point. At this point having a brain is now a net loss. Everything is now so effing stupid

[@MinosML]

​@@jollypolly1686seems like Clownmaxxing is the new meta guys

[@iasaint6649]

No way, I'm taking the elevator to the top floor for the final time... it has been an honour, gentlemen.

[@WackyEncapsulatedFruitCup]

I would be sad if you really did. I know I don't know you at all, but you can't let the bad win.

[@SirNightmareFuel]

but if you do then you'll never get your own rich short Finnish gf 😢 if they can, so can you...if you work towards it.❤

[@cactushroom]

@@SirNightmareFuel please tell me all chris chan worked towards to get his

[@YeshuaLives4YHWH]

o7 good run chief, cya next server wipe

[@ActuallyDeath]

*_Ayo?_** Nah, don't do it! If you do you will miss all the crazy shit of the mid 2030s to the late 2040s!*

[@teejaynumber13]

Honestly, I'm not surprised. The reason our society is so fucked up is because the worst human beings keep getting rewarded by life.

[@Daminionz]

just think - their kid will be somewhere out there. YOU could run the risk of dating them, OR your kids. Someone will run the risk. This sick lineage will just continue living on and you're right - because the worst keep getting rewarded. While us ''average normal people'' get nothing.

[@Stiksta]

Cause it's a numbers game. Rich get richer, money makes more money. And for getting girls, being known my millions of people... Statistically one of them is going to be hot and into you even if you are a trash human being and ugly. How many girls personally know you exist if you are single? Probably not more than a small handful and 95 percent of those are gay, taken, or your family. So you are screwed while the asmons and chans get to play the field for free in the spotlight. Tinder doesn't put you on a spotlight, that is the aoe farm for women and Chad's. You are just one of millions of average dudes that yet swiped into the trash ten times in a row with others of your kind till they get to a Chad. Modern society sucks. Gone are the days where you just grow up in a small town and pair off naturally with your neighbors and/or get hooked up by your family and neighbors that all know each other and have friends living close to you to match you with. You are just some faceless drone known by nobody. Cherish your close family while you still have them since they will be the only people that care about you in this world. Hopefully you didn't make the mistake of moving across the country to go to some shitty college and get some shitty dead end job that will be replaced by AI.

[@carlwinslow8165]

@@Daminionz Bro, he literally just proved that there is no excuse. He relentlessly put himself out there and it paid off for him.

[@thekamotodragon]

@@Daminionz I think the thing you and most dudes in these comments fail to realize is that us being regular, normal people, while allowing us to dodge controversy and problems in our lives, also leads to a boring life. Life rewards people who take risks, not those who are good or moral. Being a terrible famous guy (look at Diddy) will get you way more companionship than being a nice, moral regular guy because fame is more attractive than all that other stuff (this is how even CC has a gf rn). It sucks and i hate it, but this is the way the world is, and you either adapt or get left behind. So, honestly the msg we should get from this is "do ANYTHING to get famous" because that will get you more traction than anything else.

[@TheDragonofRevelation]

​@@thekamotodragonOr you can live your life on the edge and give women the thrills they seek. Otherwise you're right, you will get left behind in the genetic arms race we call "having kids." Just be warned, you may share in Chris's fate or fate even worse if you go down that route. You have been informed, the choice is yours.

[@Rust·Spencer·Cohle]

I'm convinced we're living a simulation and a higher power is modding us to max plugin capacity, things will be breaking. Just like a fully modded Skyrim game.

[@Skynertia]

Assuming this is actually true that child needs to be kept as far away from him as possible. Seriously...

[@jamiearmstrong3487]

For once, I will back child services, of any kind.

[@AppalachianMountaineer1863]

I think the child is real I doubt Chris is the father. I’m willing to bet she’s another troll. I doubt they even had sex she probably told him it was immaculate conception. 😂

[@ALEX-fq7hh]

​@@AppalachianMountaineer1863 I thought Chris chan was infertile

[@UnkTesla]

0:15 Sorry i have to close the video

[@pathos92]

Same 😂 Stay blessed

[@thunderring8056]

Yeah probably for the best.

[@devinlevan7031]

Can't blame ya

[@stugglefuggle8673]

LITERALLY where i paused when i went straight to the comments

[@silversrc]

Good move, the story of chris chan is one which is better left untold

[@MichaelZack-wl5sc]

That kid finna be the Antichrist 😭😭

[@LordSleven]

Antichris*

[@quirkychap]

Deadass

[@stars4772]

I hate people satanizing the child 😭 like already is going to have a rlly rough life...

[@MegaRomans01]

@@stars4772 no way in hell that kid makes it out okay. So might as well start the meme now.

[@jamiearmstrong3487]

@@stars4772 Chris has displayed he is an excellent parent, especially if it is a boy. Just look at his old Lego videos, his comics... His familiar relation-

[@koneapustaja]

And Finland loses again.jpg…

[@turbine219]

H-How !?!?! TF!?!?! I honest to God thought his life would come to a screeching halt in a prison yard. HOW IN THE FUCK does his life ++++IMPROVE++++ after r'ing his mother!?!?! What girl would even say yes to that!?! WHY DOES EVERY SECOND OF THIS MAN'S LIFE MAKE PEOPLE ASK MORE QUESTIONS!?! My brain hurts

[@MonkeyDLuffy-gd6se]

He just keeps on winning, its over for us.

[@theeccentrictripper3863]

What made him this way? What keeps us fascinated?

[@NinjapowerMS]

Being infamous on the internet helped. It's all the same story. Like how there's chicks who gets their rock off on serial killers.

[@nut1315]

I believe it's because we collectively want to see where and how far His life story goes. So it can't just end, it must keep going

[@obrnenydrevokocur9344]

@@nut1315 Bro, you used capital H in his, like if Chris was a prophet or god or smth.

[@the98themperoroftheholybri33]

That poor child. No father figure, and that woman probably has some sort of issue of she's willing to have a baby with Chris Chan

[@jr6366]

Yea she has to be down bad too.

[@igot7problemsbutyougotnojams]

She is apparently Autistic, comes from rich parents.

[@Noplayster13]

I hope that that child never finds out who his father is.

[@freespeechenjoyer]

@@jr6366 She's Finnish, she's probably on the spectrum herself. The Finns are like an innately introverted people. Any Finn will tell you how allergic they are to social interaction and how they stand like 8 feet apart from each other in public. They did that long before covid social distancing too.

[@JackCarsonite]

​@@freespeechenjoyerrofl @ people making up diagnosis for any behavior.

[@Viperness]

That child is going to have a interesting life to say the least.

[@Immortal_BP]

the child is going to be touched by Chris, rip that kid

[@Not_interestEd-]

Not if it gets aborted. Promise you, she's gonna leave him sooner or later. Always happens.

[@MrTripppster]

yeah fuck that, imagine growing and realising your parents were actual fucking whack jobs... poor kid, didn't stand a chance

[@tylerharris4568]

They will just abort it

[@GlobalBricks1]

​@@tylerharris4568😮😢

[@noobmasterchief4314]

Yea the end of the world cant come soon enough. This is indeed the worst timeline where Chris-chan has a kid and I'm still single.

[@OMartinez91]

Imagine finding out you have less rizz than Chris-chan

[@mr.merlot]

This hurts so bad lol Geting out Rizzed by Chris

[@hisaceinthehole3426]

@@mr.merlot another massive blow to the ego. easy to stay humble with no self-esteem now.

[@LordSleven]

I genuinely feel completely defeated at this revelation

[@LimitPro1]

This is pretty funny to me glad I am a proud introvert

[@Dregomz02]

It's nothing once you know who women likes it's always dark triad, they hate common men with IQ higher than 105 they call them boring if they are not abusive and have self control.

[@SonixAnimations10000]

at this point the universe is just doing the most random things to see how people react

[@StevenSeagalGenius]

it’s gotta be aliens making changes and then observing us

[@PaNDaSNiP3R]

The fact that this thing is still allowed to roam the planet is mind boggling

[@taborevan]

yep

[@falcongamer58]

Imagine having a she/her dad 💀 🔫

[@falcongamer58]

Imagine having a she/her dad

[@AppalachianMountaineer1863]

Fact that it was able to leave the country with that conviction is mind boggling.

[@RDV333]

Bro got the Mom achievement and is still allowed to roam towards Platinum.

[@vrooooooooooooooooooom]

I am terrified for that baby. I hope some government agency is keeping a close eye on them.

[@benrocky100]

I hope child protective services are in the delivery room with a catcher's glove.

[@ttdttd4211]

Cps is evil

[@mr.smiles3212]

My god, that kid is coming into the world with a historic rep debuff.

[@ALEX-fq7hh]

Not only that, that kid is going to be short af thanks to his mother's height (In a country where people tend to be really tall) and probably autistic thanks to his father's genes 💀💀💀💀 That poor child is already struggling in life and hasn't even born yet

[@JustSomeReptile]

I truly feel sorry for his future child

[@purplefanta7142]

Try saying "I hope she's a good father" and feel how much laughter bubbles up inside you.

[@paulofaquin]

His child is luckier than most if you live in the US, at least he got the opportunity to see what the game looks like beyond the tutorial...

[@SilverLining1]

​@@paulofaquinthere are limits, and being the son of chris chan passes that limit and makes your life inherently worse than being born in a poor third world country

[@TiczR]

​@@paulofaquinyou have no idea how screwed this kid is. If it's even true (hope fucking not).

[@paulofaquin]

@@TiczR I have a idea, I've watched videos about this guy, but you know, it's better to have a screwed life than no life at all, having abusive parents is really bad, being a orphan is really bad, but these people still have a chance to have a decent life, as long as it's up to them to decide, this will always be better than not having a chance at all.

[@taOGrimace]

He's doing it. He's making a real Sonichu. He is making one and we didn't stop it.

[@hakerro4102]

2:04 THE PROPHESIED CHILD IS UPON US !

[@na-dm6jb]

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

[@MasterChef1957]

May god have mercy on that child for his "father" will have none

[@ObiJakobe]

The antichrist Crystal wearing the mark of the Beast (sonichu)

[@41Nizmo]

Just another average blue hair redditor incoming.

[@kaydonrubalcaba]

Lisan al Gaib

[@SomeCanine]

That woman has no idea how badly she ruined her life by interacting with the walking curse that is Chris Chan.

[@MootPotato]

There is absolutely no way that she doesn't know. Obvious humiliation kink, bleeding heart syndrome, and/or doing this for internet fame.

[@rpg_haven]

I would imagine she's well aware

[@heavyhebrew]

She is Finnish, death is a release from the suffering of the finngolian existence. Remember, Finns regard killing Russians the same way we approach parties and friendship. It is the only way a Finn can express feelings, is by murdering Russians, everything else is making sure your neighbor stays at least 5 km away, you drink yourself to an early grave, and you curse God for having you born as a Finn and not as a gloriously angelic Soumi. To her, carrying the seed of a demon in her belly is what she figures the world deserves for bearing her existence into being as a Finn. Finns do not live in darkness, they are darkness given human form. Russians should have stayed out of their forests and not disturbed their elder god, but communists are born FAFO victims.

[@AMALRICAMALRIC]

@@rpg_haven Yeah, she must be crazy as him

[@OffMetaGang]

I assume she is crazy as well. It's not like he is unknown.......(Jesus. All she has to do is open her eyes....)

[@thegnome87]

The curse has been passed on. Anyone with a sonichu medallion should be scared af

[@Cybeldar]

It got Nick Rekieta.

[@mystrenula3911]

The only way to escape the curse is to wear full Chris Chan cosplay, that will trick the medallion into thinking you're it's master and protect you from the curse

[@TheGosgosh]

I am not religious in any way, but I honestly PRAY for that kid. They’re already done for.

[@soloknightrb9700]

0:43 That "NOPE" caught me off guard lmfao

[@Gi8740dc]

Worst case scenario, it's a daughter

[@matt_r.2510]

🤮

[@perfectogaming5240]

Oh god.

[@inciacci549]

God have mercy if he names her Crystal.

[@Pers0n97]

Worst case scenario, it's a son.

[@-BUGZ-]

Worst case scenario, this is real. Damn.

[@martymcfly8535]

The cop recoiled from the frisking when he said that.

[@brian_sipe]

Pretty sure he spit a little on the word frisk, but not intentionally.

[@Bramandin]

Imagine. And some girl wanted him inside of her.

[@Diabeticsandwiches]

Pandora's box will be opened a second time and there will be no hope

[@SUPERSMASHTV177O13]

All hope is gone

[@herbtube30]

That kid is going to need child protective services pronto.

[@littleluxia]

Put the kid up for adoption stat!

[@MrDUneven]

@@suomiapina89 Didn't help Milo

[@ttdttd4211]

Cps is evil...don't trust cps.

[@ttdttd4211]

They traffic children

[@VicStrange9]

@@suomiapina89 at this point I hope you guys have literal space marines as protective service agents

[@libertariansasquatch]

my god, having your father be Chris Chan is truly Dark.

[@heavyhebrew]

unless you are the antichrist then it makes perfect sense

[@StevenSeagalGenius]

Top tier genetics

[@MLGLunatic]

@@StevenSeagalGenius not only that but going to school when your other classmates find a video of your dad shoving the symbol of his autism into his ass for a random troll on the internet

[@Tential1]

I'm out played by Chris Chan.... There's no point in even playing anymore. Just disconnect me from server. I'm done.

[@dodgyyoutuber9560]

You can’t log out. You die in the game, you die in real life

[@nonamejr1pf]

that's the point

[@birdothegreat]

This is a dark day for us Finns. Please pray for us all in this difficult time.

[@SUPERSMASHTV177O13]

Rest in peace finland

[@birdothegreat]

@@SUPERSMASHTV177O13 Thank you. Everywhere I go, people are grieving. What was once the happiest nation on earth has turned into the most miserable one.

[@arcadius3257]

I hope this genuinely makes him a better person, for the sake of the girl insane enough to be with him and the child.

[@WadeAlma]

It will make him worse. If that child is a girl it's already prophesied what he's gonna do to her. Especially if he names her Crystal.

[@liarwithagun]

Not joking, I fear what might happen to the kid from Chris-Chan. Boy or girl, but especially girl. For the love of god if he has a kid with her, I hope their relationship degrades immediately (which will probably happen because he won't be supportive or help take proper care of a baby) and the baby is kept away from him.

[@JavierSalcedoC]

mental illness doesnt work like that

[@SolidSnake240]

​@@WadeAlma This is hilariously dark 😂

[@Jdjdjdujakzgsha]

@@SolidSnake240it way funny when it wasn’t a likely scenario, now it’s genuinely worrying

[@TreikoNimph]

Chris getting more action than 90% of Asmon viewers...

[@KingOfhearts72]

Kek

[@Channel-io4xu]

And you're one of them

[@quekZo95]

damn im muscular and not bad looking and i cant get girls wtf...

[@hisaceinthehole3426]

@@quekZo95 yet you'll have to wait until women get desperate enough. _You don't mind waiting until you're 45, do you?_ lol

[@quekZo95]

@@hisaceinthehole3426 then ill be forever alone but im okay with that 😂

[@Awakened_Mucacha]

If the girl turns out to be a troll, I will fucking laugh.

[@paulofaquin]

Taking it as far as getting impregnated would show how invested in trolling she is, for the lols.

[@cenowador]

i'm truly hoping so

[@magneric]

Getting boinked and creampied by Chris Chan for a troll is kinda... idk man.

[@ForgetTheCat]

Imagine its true. How many trolls Chris faced before? Thats a whole new level of trolling ngl

[@GeekyGami]

Inb4 she is literally unable to have children

[@spugelo359]

Some people go to hell when they die... but that child will be born to hell.

[@Vaguer_Weevil]

In a time where I'm at my lowest, at my loneliest, this was absolutely not what I needed to see today. Just... How? What's even happening anymore?

[@adreanmarantz2103]

This is the moment when you wait till midnite, walk out into the rain, soothed by pitter patter on the wet trees and remind yourself: 'At least Chris Chan is not my father'

[@MrSyn64]

Your time will come I promise just get out there and try to change it I'm rooting for you man

[@thefool1086]

@@MrSyn64 nah is completly over man

[@arcelay4764]

​@@adreanmarantz2103 then it turns out re-incarnation is real, and you're Chris-chan's newborn.

[@Pitkänen22]

Same

[@rLxJake]

The fact Palworld didn’t have a “sonichu” like creature was a huge mistake.

[@captaincritter6173]

Editor: “Blessed be those who don’t know.” Me: “Well said editor, well said.”

[@Official_RetroMania]

Why? 😂 Is pure comedy gold I feel bad for people who don't know!

[@Orange7248-u6o]

Now I know 😢

[@beowulfsrevenge4369]

I wish I didn't know.

[@Skadoniz]

i wish i didnt

[@captaincritter6173]

Yep, don’t we all.

[@PixelbitScript]

The daddy issues of that child are going to be so absurd that they make most edgy dnd characters look like they have loving relationships with their parents

[@augustday9483]

We've reached new heights of "I can fix him" behavior.

[@Pocket_of_Explosives]

That kid's life is over. Imagine asking father Chris chan why the sky is blue and he responds with theories of multiverses and give you his sonichu books for reference

[@GlobalBricks1]

He will say his baby is a ailen😅 from space 😢

[@GruntoSkunko]

That is literally no different than being the child of a Christian. The Bible is pure fiction.

[@winterxx1555]

I would be depressed if I had to come home to that every day, while seeing other kids normal fathers. That kid is in a long road ahead.

[@GruntoSkunko]

How is that any different from being born to Christian parents?

[@GruntoSkunko]

No more absurd than regular religions

[@Kafson]

There is always gonna be that one vulnerable girl with a savior complex.

[@Nick-ij5nt]

that's my problem, I'm not autistic enough

[@captainobvious8037]

Nah, for this one it gotta be some weird fetishes or heavy personal issues

[@AntonioDelÁngel-o3m]

Sad, where is mine

[@J_Clean_1996]

​@@AntonioDelÁngel-o3mYikes...

[@MervtheWarlord]

@@AntonioDelÁngel-o3m just got to metal/grunge/emo bars

[@FrahdChikun]

Good news: Chris recently tweeted, confirming that what he was saying was just a hypothetical situation. He isn't pregnant with Flutter. All is right in the world.

[@androgynousmaggot9389]

Poor kid! Doomed before being even born

[@KenLinx]

Doesn't he have fantasies about his daughters in his old Sonichu comics? That kid is going to be born into hell.

[@alexandriachan3621]

We have Chris Chan's pregnant baby mama before GTA 6

[@HazardousBeast22]

when that baby arrives, keep it far away from Chris ffs, we already know he "loves" his family

[@andrewroy9263]

I want to shower until my skin melts off.

[@BeyondDaX]

We all should after learning about this

[@SUPERSMASHTV177O13]

We should all dive in bath full of Fluoroantimonic acid

[@benjaminc.6778]

And the woke progressives want us to call this monster a woman. The world is a clown show.

[@BeyondDaX]

Always has been since 2007

[@yoshimasterleader]

Monsters and Women aren't mutually exclusive.

[@genericperson360]

I’m literally trans myself and I don’t bother with Chris’s gender nonsense lmao

[@cyanmage1]

I'm all for respecting genders or personal identity but not his, screw this guy and using gender identity as a shield to hide behind

[@WindyWalk]

@@genericperson360 You're the same as him lol

[@jtown1022]

Aliens abduct me. I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

[@mirceazaharia2094]

*understanding alien noises* 👽 👾

[@silversrc]

this a def level of crash out😭

[@Thixico]

aliens don't want anything to do with this planet bro

[@ImDed520]

I cannot imagine what horrors this child will have to go through.

[@An.Unsought.Thought]

"What's your excuse": Well uh... I'm not mentally ill enough to take advantage of a presumably mentally unstable girl with some sort of abandonment issues. While also being unlucky enough and unattractive enough to be only good enough for unrequited love. I've also developed a fear of driving so I dont really go anywhere.

[@user-fe8gx3ie5v]

Fear of driving is immature.

[@golagiswatchingyou2966]

​@@user-fe8gx3ie5vso is fear of spiders or heights or anything that's irrational.

[@michaelrivera6220]

​@@user-fe8gx3ie5vbeing a cunt for no reason is immature

[@golagiswatchingyou2966]

Look at it this way, if Chris Chan can get a gf and get her pregnant, there just might be hope for all of us.

[@johnhalliday5420]

​@@user-fe8gx3ie5v How dare this individual fear a fast moving, large object capable of destroying the human body in a matter of seconds. Completely irrational fear, he'd be better off being scared of feathers, amirite?

[@angelcrespo6232]

Damn that’s crazy…imagine getting rewarded by the universe for bad behavior

[@ronnieDaking]

history is written by victors

[@RedemptionDenied666]

That's our timeline bro. Become a psychopath if you want to get ahead

[@idkissausername1667]

its really not even surprising anymore

[@tuh774]

Feels like the norm now.

[@Chadrick2]

Some day or another he's gonna get bad karma

[@jimmcneal5292]

The most hilarious thing would be if they somehow have a gigachad son

[@mr.merlot]

I need this in my life just take all the traits of the most Macho military guy whos name is Sonic holy molly I NEED THIS Fan Fic writers where you at

[@xavierhouston4650]

Genetics out of pity.😂

[@illliiiiillliii6265]

If they have a son he will be conscripted to the Finnish military when he is 18.

[@defeatisfinal]

@@illliiiiillliii6265 Not if he is born in US

[@metronome8471]

Baby Crystal Sonichu has the wealth of Finland.

[@uberhaxornovanongalaktiksk9798]

Bro raped his own mother and got no punishment at all 💀, yet he somehow finds a simp girlfriend and gets her pregnant. Nah ain't no way 😂😂

[@nerozone_]

I can never emotionally recover from this

[@Bramandin]

OMEGALUL guys who got hurt by this are OMEGA funny ☠

[@Bjorn_R]

I did not expect this to be the point where I felt like I failed as a man.

[@fierceslagga2084]

Good God, I feel the same too right now

[@TheDEU99]

Join the club

[@dumkorph]

I just knew Chris Chan's story wouldn't end in prison, there is always another arc. Even when Chris is gone, his offspring will continue his legacy

[@PuddilyOops]

God! Don’t say that! 🤮

[@stevenobrien7686]

Like child of Chucky.

[@littleluxia]

Did he even get released from prison?

[@WotsOnSecond2]

That kid's gonna have a rough life

[@MultiLimpet]

Chris chan owns a house. Makes thousands streaming and selling his art. Got his girlfriend pregnant.

[@ILikeGuns1992]

He makes thousands streaming and selling his art?

[@Cattivagirl]

​@@ILikeGuns1992Yes, but due to his reckless spending & hoarding habits from Barb, Chris-chan is always in debt.

[@selc978]

@@ILikeGuns1992 he sells the medallions for like 120$ and other random shit on his etsy. i could def see him selling like 1k worth of driveway rocks just for his imfamy

[@Dr.W.Krueger]

This man also has no d*ck. There, I said it. He is a man. Always will be. No amount of makeup or clothes will ever change his G-d given genetics.

[@Caydiem]

He burned his house down years ago.

[@Ray3D]

There was a friend that once told me, "there is someone special for every dog in the world". I believe he was right. Truer words have never been come to pass.

[@biffin1123]

ok! then where is my special one?

[@ignacio6454]

@@biffin1123 In my country the saying is "Nobody lacks God". But today this is bullsh1t! I remember as a kid in the 80's even the legless bastard of my neighborhood (yes he was an as$) had a wife to fu&ck with! everybody had their piece of the pie so to speak. Now we have porn actors and rich men having sex with ALL the women in the world, and not all but most of all other man, suck lemons.

[@Dregomz02]

It's only true for degenerates, mass murderers and grapists not sane man like me, women hate self control and high IQ men.

[@CaptainTitforce]

​@@biffin1123Hiding from Chris

[@аноним-п6т7с]

You are not a dog

[@MM-kc4hw]

The kid's life is over before it even start

[@lamhkak47]

Moderately likely a false alarm CWC on Facebook: "Okay, all of this is starting to get out of control now. There is no pregnancy; I was speaking hypothetically in that live stream. I am so surprised how even when I say something hypothetical, it gets misunderstood. Thank you for your kindness. I reiterate: there is no pregnancy with anyone."