This Just Helps Create Incels

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#Politics #Commentary #Drama

[@Romanticoutlaw]

hey, fellas, this is just proof that you're within rights to have standards too. No one should be tolerating this kind of behavior and rewarding it with pursuit. If your partner or crush plays head games, walk, no matter your or their gender. No matter how hot they are.

[@DudesterGX]

Based

[@devinsethna1287]

Yes sirrrrrrr Also 69th like 👌

[@fraktaalimuoto]

Yes. Sadly I have learned from experience.

[@beganitdidnt6535]

women only play mind games with ugly men or to guys shes giving a chance bc she knows she has many options unlike the guy shes manipulating

[@dasuero7489]

Outlawpilled.

[@Juhz0r]

Women definitely should not be boosting the message that "no" actually means "maybe." That sounds like a recipe for disaster.

[@pieterjan131]

YEP and also "i am not ready for i relationship yet" does not help

[@democracydignityhumanrights]

A lot of girls pull this garbage.

[@democracydignityhumanrights]

@Harpy Productions usually they’ll just quit talking to you. As long as you aren’t a complete moron, it should be totally obvious, she won’t have anything to do with you. If she says no, but then keeps showing you all these signs she likes you and keeps talking to you all the time, she pulling some shit.

[@virtualgambit577]

My thoughts exactly, I have been on the receiving end too many times of a guy taking my "no" as a "maybe". Hopefully this doesn't become the norm, I'm tired of filing restraining orders.

[@democracydignityhumanrights]

@@virtualgambit577 I wouldn’t say it’s the norm but it’s extremely common. I have had a girl do this to me at least in about 1/4 to 1/3 of my attempts at relationships. I’m not some salty incel dude either. I have had many beautiful girlfriends, my current girlfriend is the most beautiful girl in the world. The girl before my girlfriend did this to me, and my girlfriend even sort of did it, she broke up with me when she didn’t really want to, and then kept talking to me, and then told me the truth and begged me to take her back.

[@jacobs2099]

Honestly the guy who got rejected doged a bullet. If this is how she views relationships he's better off with someone else.

[@salt-d2032]

True.

[@zotaninoron3548]

Gonna be real, these women rejecting men and sad they moved on did those dudes a favor. They are 1000% not ready for actual relationships and hooking up with those guys would have only damaged the poor dudes. Those dudes undoubted found someone more mature and are the better for it.

[@democracydignityhumanrights]

I don’t know, a lot of the time people don’t find someone else when someone does something like this. I found someone else, but a lot of people are single right now, we have a loneliness epidemic. I got lucky, I found a girl who loves me and will let herself love me.

[@_doofiis7420]

Dated a girl for 6 years and she was exactly like this leaving was easily one of the best decisions I ever made hell afterward I had a one-nighter with a girl that didn't treat me like garbage the thought of being treated as if I am a person was overwhelming

[@thatoneuser8600]

How tf do you meet people so easily?

[@salt-d2032]

@@thatoneuser8600 Lots of factors, like how often are you meeting regular friends, do you go on dating apps a lot of the time, looks, personality, are you their type, are they your type, etc.

[@Kauppi2]

@@thatoneuser8600 women are so toxic nowadays

[@_doofiis7420]

@@thatoneuser8600 the girl I was with for 6 years was in high school band with me and the other girls I met I found on tinder or bumble I just try to find enjoyment in talking about whatever to whoever

[@thatoneuser8600]

@@_doofiis7420 oh okay, dating apps huh. *signs up immediately*

[@moss3779]

This clump of moss hopes everyone is having a nice day 🥺

[@giodawg45]

thank you

[@Radocruz]

Thank you, I hope you are having a nice day as well.

[@EdgieAlias]

*heavy breathing*

[@Saturnia2014]

We all need a little bit of moss in our lives Thank you, Moss 💚 hope you have a wonderful day too 🌻

[@daraghokane4236]

Moss is one of my favourite plants or flowers

[@Darth_Insidious]

If I make my move and get rejected, it could mean 2 things, they either aren't interested or they don't want to be straight with me. Both are a signal to move on. Any man who values honesty and communication should do the same.

[@nzephier]

It's not sexist to point out femcels exist. Both incel and femcel hurt both sides, in different ways. We should call out the bullshit when we see it, men or women.

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

Can we really call women who do this "femcels"? Presumably they've got at least one guy they're boinking... "Femcel" from my understanding better befits the NiceGirl/Not-Like-Other-Girls(tm) and "legbeard" (as opposed to neckbeard) types, but I'm also not an expert on any of this. They're basic b/tches. Vapid airheads subsisting on hollow validation and shallow affection. Knew a couple people like that in college; thought they could basically coast by on being pretty, manipulating others, and railing coke. They didn't last three semesters.

[@user-di8kl4cc5u]

Isn't Incel unisex? AFAIK Incel definition doesn't specifically talk about men but just individual who can't get a romantic partner due to both physical state and mental mindset

[@bhg123ful]

What this ALSO creates (referring to young women rejecting their male peers advances but wanted them to keep pursuing them and try harder) - this ABSOLUTELY will and does lead to HARASSMENT. Like the very definition. Not that that still excuses any man from doing so, but rejecting men's advances to see if he really wants you can only lead to harassment! If we are to stop harassment cases, then women should call out their own to stop that kind of behavior, as it just encourages it from men. Women do need to make signs of receptivity OBVIOUS for men.

[@truckerdave8465]

Agree but the echo chamber is strong on the internet. Can’t call out something you never see.

[@melodyyoung9640]

We try, but girls are just as dumb as boys. We are equal in everything, humans are strange.

[@MehlDragon]

The ladies in these tweets come off as the girl version of "the player". The guy being aloof if not treating his "target" like shit in an attempt to make them try harder for his affection. This is basically that. Honestly if society stopped treating sex as a sports competition we probably would have less problems dealing with sex and everything that falls under it as much. We've progressed more than our ancestors. We need to start acting like it.

[@page8301]

Funny that you mention sports competition, as a guy who was still a virgin in his early 20s, I was relentless mocked by some of my basketball teammates for being one and being told stories of my teammates "conquests" which I never asked for and could not have cared less about. Even worse they tried to convince me to visit a brothel, never understanding that I was interested in a relationship far more so than just sex. Also, a part in my always felt bad for women who became sex workers. Might be a sort of toxic idea but seeing as one of my sisters' friends was forced into it to feed her addiction, I just cannot help it much. I don't feel like elaborating further on this.

[@truckerdave8465]

Sports competition…for dudes. Women don’t win by having sex, only the guy ‘wins’, broadly speaking. Maybe that has something to do with y’all’s issues? Maybe?

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

@@truckerdave8465 Still sounds like the issue stems from men since women laying men is only considered "slutty" or "loose" or bad because men have historically valued loyalty from women. Well, they pretended to enough for societies to enforce it upon women, at least. Maybe if guys were shamed by society and culture for having many partners or being disloyal to the same extent - or for as long as - women have been, perhaps the ""player" vs "slut"" double-standard wouldn't exist.

[@crabohato4954]

Lesson of the story: don't date terminally online people

[@Jazzmaster1992]

Societal pressure on everyone to become relationship/sex worthy is going to inspire dread in folks who simply can't find a partner or can't get laid. As nice as it is to think you can just spend your life alone, I think it's safe to say most people would prefer to be in the company of others. I'm not suggesting there aren't men that are sexually frustrated that don't have issues they themselves need to fix, but I think there is another layer to this beyond simply feeling entitled to sex or a relationship.

[@Romanticoutlaw]

I think at least one area that could be addressed to fill that void is strong platonic friendships. I've had platonic friendships that met my entire need for emotional intimacy, and I'm talking true ride-or-dies who I was closer to and more open with than partners I had over the course of those friendships. If you can get that need met, meeting the physical need of flings is an easy get by comparison

[@Jazzmaster1992]

@@Romanticoutlaw good point, although it's possibly as difficult as finding a romantic partner. It's easy to treat people as friend objects even if we don't mean to. I love the idea of ride or dies, but in my experience even they can come and go.

[@thatindiandude4602]

​@@Jazzmaster1992

[@leefairweather5772]

@@Romanticoutlaw unfortunately the people having no luck with women probably aren't great at non romantic social skills either.

[@Romanticoutlaw]

@@leefairweather5772 oh for sure, but I think it would be healthier for them to focus on getting better at those skills than trying to find a partner to fix them

[@kumalala9133]

I'm a young dude (recently turned 19). I don't expect anyone here to read this or take this seriously, nor do I expect anyone to care. Throughout my life I was bullied and always picked out and abused by teachers and students. This isn't an incel lie either. One time a kid smacked my head into a wooden beam & laughed while the teacher watched, smiling. I didn't allow myself to cry (was sort of hardened from a young age since my father abused my mom in fits of alcoholic rage). When I did it back to him he cried and the teacher screamed at me and told me to say sorry. I didn't. I was always ostracised as a kid, and picked on when other kids would fit in. Then throughout my teenage years my friends would all get attention from girls. Girls I liked would flock to my friends with no effort. I always made people laugh and tried my best, but nothing worked. Yet my friends who didn't say a word had girls leaning on their shoulders etc just effortlessly. It's not a sense of entitlement. It's just the sense of being some sort of weirdo or freak that gets me. Why couldn't I have been born as literally anybody different than myself? It's the same feeling since childhood; that sense of you being somehow different and subhuman compared to literally everybody else. I don't feel entitled to anything on earth. I just want to fit in somewhere and to form a relationship with someone as you say, but it feels absolutely impossible; I've never fit in anywhere. So even if I were to "accept that I'm not entitled to anything", as this guy recommends, I feel like ig wouldn't make a difference at all. Sorry for the long rant, loneliness and isolation are very tough topics for me.

[@harsh3948]

Take the passport and leave

[@JustE-in6to]

Aye bro I promise you are going to get through that shit bro don't ever give up I know what it's like not to fit in bro pride yourself in not fitting in

[@raptorboss6688]

One thing I’ve learned while growing up is that not fitting in, while it’s painful and awful, can be something that makes you a stronger person. When you don’t fit in you’re able to see things from a different perspective and having a different perspective is a very useful thing. Throughout all the pain and misery even though it’s a struggle there’s hope there that only you can find. Keep fighting! Ik you can do it!

[@taras3702]

Get your life in order, get a passport and leave the country. Never forget how the opposite sex treated you here

[@nomadsland8322]

I totally get this comment and it’s sentiments. Other kids growing up, and now other people, “just get to have things you aren’t allowed to have, or do things you aren’t allowed to do. And for no reason other than you’re you and you suck, they are them and they’re awesome.” And now any amount of complaining about my growing apathy feels entirely wrong and like I’m being gaslit. I wouldn’t be this way if it didn’t feel like it’s eternally expected of me to just sit down shut up about myself and just do what I’m told to service the needs others before my needs are even deserving of being mentioned. But hey, I’m the one who mindlessly internalized my worthlessness that was conditioned into me by the system. Now I just deserve my fate as far as people are concerned.

[@eronavvstark6674]

Hey Xan, glad to see you calling this behavior out. Because just as you said - women are just people. And there are good people, and there are shitty people. But just wanted to to add in: as a trans dude, I've seen both camps, and was socialized as female for a long ass time. So I've got some perspective. While I agree this behavior is 100% learned, and there are plenty of women who do the "try harder ♥" thing to dick around with dudes emotions, you're also misunderstanding a huge chunk of the women out there who do this stuff. There be women out here who have been conditioned to believe they ARE a prize to be won. That their only value is in how hard a guy is willing to fight for them. Just stop and think about it for a sec; it's the way a lot of women are cast in movies and stories, right? Especially like, romance flicks. That their life is boring and horrible and then some guy will come along and fight everything in his way to protect her and take care of her and PROVE his love to her. It's the way that conservatism warps women's brains. They're not all evil when they're doing this. Sometimes, they just want to feel special and feel compelled to "tease" because of the whole madona/whore dichotomy - They don't want to be "too easy", so if a dude will keep pursuing them even after a few rejections, they feel desired without doing anything "wrong" (aka, having sex). This isn't because women feel they're "worth a lot" and trying to lord themselves over men, but rather it's because women are conditioned to think that their only value IS a man loving them, so they come to place too high a value on exactly that. A lot of the time when women do this, they often really just want validation, to be seen, to be special. That's why like, these women act emotionally wounded when the guy they were rejecting "moved on", and why so many women liked the posts. It's great you pointed it out, but I think you sorta missed the larger root of the problem. It's how women are taught to feel their only real worth comes from when a guy is interested in them, and how they want to stretch that feeling out into a romance novel to feel like he really is "the one".

[@knuclestheechidna5406]

It's kind of like how people based men worth on how many women he can get. If he doesn't get the girl he's forever a "loser".

[@jeffskarski6644]

I think you're right, but it's so ironic that they blame "feminism" for this behavior.

[@aegisScale]

To those guys, feminism is when women do things. Lots of things. (I joke but I don't think I'm wrong . . .)

[@LoneWulf278]

@@aegisScale 😂 Yeah, it’s just a catch-all word for female power. But when it comes to sex, women would have that kinda power with or without feminism.

[@Joseph-cq3ij]

While that's true, some feminists will play defence for this sort of behaviour. I think it's pretty clear that, when men act entitled, they'll be called entitled. But, when women act entitled, feminists will talk about how actually the patriarchy drives women to act this way through social conditioning from birth. Whether explicitly or implicitly, it's usually the man's fault.

[@DeciNate_]

@@Joseph-cq3ij exactly. Feminists never start it but so many back these people up after the fact. I say that as a feminist.

[@synchronium24]

Feminism usually isn't responsible for women acting poorly. Scott Alexander's _Radicalizing the Romanceless_ does a great job of explaining what many feminists are responsible for. In summary: 1) equating men complaining about not getting sexual or romantic attention with entitlement to sexual or romantic attention 2) accusing these men of having toxic personalities and saying it's the reason they can't get laid, ignoring that in aggregate women find men with asshole-ish traits MORE attractive, not less 3) via 1) and 2), pushing lonely men into the hands of PUAs, MRAs, and other right wingers who are likely to give them advice that will turn them into actual misogynists Thankfully, Xanderhal does address 3) in this video.

[@Onus6688]

Xan you’re the most based zoomer I swear you should have a million subs. - from an older woman that knows young men need more progressive guys like you. Keep kicking ass.

[@FifthTrumpet]

>older woman xan's day has been made

[@Onus6688]

@@FifthTrumpet LMAO 🤣

[@nikkorin]

Ngl, women are legit socialized to value themselves proportionally to the attention they get from men, and some bitches are forever stuck in that one. When I was around 17/18 I had the idea that having a guy be obsessed with you and give you attention was a desirable thing. And then I got one. It was the worst. People, if he moves on, count your blessings, it's the best that can happen. Dudes who idealize you and get an obsession are so terrifying.

[@harsh3948]

Yeah, it’s better to be the toxic unemotional douche than a creepy obsessed simp

[@tonyschannel7438]

Oh you think the women on Twitter are bad? From what i've seen the women on Twitter are sweet little angels compared to the women on TikTok!

[@ToxiCancun]

He said someone. He wasn't claiming the women was at fault. He even blackmailed himself aswell. Just stating the fact that they may be some women that fill in title to take advantage of an individual feeling, doesn't mean he group women as a whole. He even started that women are basically being taufht at birth to become house wife. Example I wish he bought up. Girls kids toys. He mainly was talking about American society that basically cooking an type of image based of the gender they are born in.

[@ToxiCancun]

He said someone. He wasn't claiming the women was at fault. He even blackmailed himself aswell. Just stating the fact that they may be some women that fill in title to take advantage of an individual feeling, doesn't mean he group women as a whole. He even started that women are basically being taufht at birth to become house wife. Example I wish he bought up. Girls kids toys. He mainly was talking about American society that basically cooking an type of image based of the gender they are born in.

[@ILoveWhenTurkeyHasEarthquakes]

Thats 100% true

[@erisofterra8986]

Fuck why is this so true...

[@markstriker925]

Yeah, I remember the whole dating bisexual men debate was a thing on Tik Tok. 😂😂

[@apriljk6557]

Twitter woman: No means maybe. men: No means maybe? Twitter woman: creep men: 🖐🏼 woman: wait🥺

[@dwagon6706]

Well it’s not the same women

[@melaniey.5596]

Self love and self respect is more important than we give credit to. I still think if we don’t properly love ourselves, we can’t properly love others. It’s like a balance, I think. If you love yourself more than you love others, that might be narcissism; but if you love others more than you love yourself, that’s... a mess that tries to compensate the lack of self love with the loves of others/is more vulnerable to be abused. So, to the Kings (and Queens) our there... there is no shame to love ourselves. Also bad inherently bad with dating with low self stem, but one gotta be aware of the hurdles it comes with. Good luck with your dating and love life out there. \(^_^)/ Gods know I need it too.

[@shizachan8421]

I think its also important for people to realize issues in their social behavior and a lack of social skills and understand that this may be something they have to overcome instead of blaming it on others. In most cases, an Incel is an Incel because he is just not fun or comfortable to be around or has an attractive personality as a potential partner. Most of them aren't even good hook-up material because on top of not being that fun around and often not physically grooming themselves well, women will also notice the entitled nice guy type and know that hooking up will lead to drama or end up being dangerous. And its not even just women, most of these kids don't even have really good male friend groups, they usually stick to other incels who give each other a positive feedback loop by blaming their issues on everyone else. Because if you are your average happy, positive boy who has a good friend circles and is in a relationship, would that angry, miserable incel kid really be something you want to emotionally handle? The kid who probably will keep on insulting the people you love and care about?

[@melaniey.5596]

@@shizachan8421 I didn’t consider it but the problems with a lack of self love can also happen in non-romantic relationships. Friends can be jealous of who they consider their BFF getting more friends (because they are insecure so they fear that once their BFF gets more friends they will abandon them), and so be toxic to their BFF and try to isolate them. That’s obviously a problem from the original person, and obviously the BFF doesn’t own it to their friend to continue being their friend if they continue being toxic to them... But I dunno if just leaving that person alone is the right answer. It’s very common for people to have a low self stem, specially teenagers. One can expect for people to grown out of it, but it feels unfair to expect them to grow out of it on their own. So I don’t think the problem with a lack of self love is something that only happens to incels, but more a wider society thing. Hell maybe even a human condition thing. But with what you are saying, from what I have heard, there is a disproportionately big amount of neurodivergent people in the incel community, and it tracks, considering how much more difficult it is for neurodivergent people it is to socialize in this still very ableist society. So I dunno how much incels have always been present in the human condition (as neurodivergence always has been), or how much they are a symptom of this more isolating modern society. Hell does speaking about them the way we are currently doing, is even more isolating to them? Would they feel as aliens or as someone broken reading this? Sometimes it feels the way society and media is trying to interact with the incel phenomena is wrong or lacking. Dunno, the only thing I know is that fixing this more isolating and exploitative society is the only way I see to make things easier for them.

[@thatoneuser8600]

So true, my whole childhood I was crippled with social anxiety so bad that I couldn't speak to anyone. I don't think very many people can relate to me from personal experiences, as I was kind of special in that sense. I think school should do a better role in getting kids to socialize from a young age because I definitely didn't feel like I ever made progress whenever I went up to do presentations or whatever since I was so in my head. I feel like I've made a lot of progress since then and I think a big part of that is really just learning to accept your mistakes as quickly as possible and move on in a nonchalant way, since I also struggled with perfectionism in social conversations. I still get in my head too much though and am struggling to just think about the conversation when talking in person rather than thinking about how I'm presenting myself.

[@SemiDoge]

@@thatoneuser8600 I can totally relate to you, buddy. You are not alone.

[@HinaCabina]

Do women like this only exist on social media and modern dating apps? is the solution to just meet people normally in public?

[@ich3730]

who would have thought being terminally online ruins someones ability to percieve the world? :D Crazy amirite

[@Saturnia2014]

The solution is to not be a dick and treat people that you want to go to bed with like human beings Odds are if women behave like that on social media or apps, they're trolling guys like the incels in question

[@Saturnia2014]

No, most women don't behave like this irl I don't know if you've noticed but everybody online is more apt to behave like a maniac. It's just like that, being online all the time isn't healthy

[@Saktoth]

You gotta be a bit unhinged to post this stuff publicly and invite this kind of scrutiny to begin with.

[@marekcunderlik6815]

Pretty much yeah, meeting people online is such a hit or miss.

[@Addisoran]

There are also a large number of cultures, including English-speaking north american cultures, that also see woman as valuable when "hard-to-get", especially when machismo is a thing. Women are expected to be "hard-to-get", otherwise men will consider them not worthwhile, "easy", or "should be cheated on." "Hard to get" for women is often a defense mechanism in misogynist societies that protects women from men who are societally encouraged to treat them like shit or cheat on them. However, with the growing economic empowerment of women and more honest conversations on relationships, there is growing recognition for how to conduct healthier and more emotionally open and trusting relationships. In the newer context, what was previously a defense mechanism can be a form of manipulation or abuse if taken to an extreme, and isn't necessarily well adapted to changing societal expectations on how people should be treated and how to treat other people or partners. Women or afab folks brought up in the original or developed "hard to get" strategy might express shock at the strategy being criticized given its past "utility", which is understandable. It's still honestly a product of patriarchy that should be sweeped away along with patriarchy, on the proviso that misogyny and patriarchy is being sweeped away.

[@BrandonL337]

This is textbook narcissism IMO. She was getting a steady supply of attention from this guy, and that's dried up now. I have to assume she's single, since I doubt most women in relationships would act like this if their getting real attention from a partner.

[@andyt7295]

On Twitter and elsewhere you can find quite a lot of this stuff ("men are trash", "if you're under 6' you're not a man", "Dream's ugly teehee"). As a man, it gets annoying, until you realise it's either edgeladies you'd better ignore or women who are coping with some sort of issue with men - you can just wish them healing, sent them their way, block and move on.

[@UnknownRayDar]

I wish no person who heals like THAT any sort of good will. If I can't say vile shit because I'm mad then neither should they. They can stay hurt. Vile is vile, full stop

[@andyt7295]

@@UnknownRayDar As disagreeable as they are, it's not like they're planning mass sh00tings or something like that - their shitposting is a symptom, not the cure. My hope is for them to realise shitting on others isn't helpful and move on, i.e. heal.

[@withinthrall1445]

@@UnknownRayDar brother you can say whatever you want, whenever you want. Nothing is stopping you from being a piece of shit back. Just remember you’re not changing anything doing that. But please don’t act like you “can’t say vile shit when you’re mad.” You can, stop being overdramatic. You’re basically admitting to being like them but are afraid of the consequences.

[@UnknownRayDar]

@@withinthrall1445 I'm saying that no one is above social norms and the consequnces that comes with falling out of them. I used myself as an example because "uhhh but if man did it, that bad rignt???" sounds stupid to say

[@UnknownRayDar]

@@andyt7295 I'm not saying that negativity should be spread to them but for damn sure positivity shouldn't be. What should be given to them is nothing. Let them writhe to themselves

[@pdhproductions9606]

Wanted a gf doesn’t make you “entitled” it makes you HUMAN. Everyone deserves a partner.

[@valiantshadowproductions]

I mean, it’s also just a really crappy way to treat people. I wish we focused on that part more. I think a lot of Lefty creators screw that part up. “It creates incels“ and “ it pushes people right“ or “it legitimizes TERFs“. The way we show these dudes there’s space for them on the left is by reassuring them and telling them that it’s awful when people treat them that way, and that we’re not all like that.

[@thedukeduck4613]

You see, your first mistake was going on Twitter

[@macdeus2601]

I don't do Twitter, but my general understanding is that using Twitter is a fast-track to discovering the worst possible examples of people in any demographic category imaginable.

[@darlalathan6143]

I do Twitter but fortunately never met these toxic femcels or incels on it. I have made a lot of porn star friends, though! 😁😃😆😅🤣😂🥰😍🤩😘😛😋😎🥳

[@anonym0usplatypus]

I really love the way you're framing this here. 10/10

[@cawabunga360]

holy fuck dude finally someone with a balanced clear and fair view of topics ive trying so hard to find chanels like yours but they end up being extreme to one or the or the other side of the argument and its so goddamb frustrating. all your points were so clear thank yoh so fucking much man i mean it bravo!!!

[@miggydoms]

I knew a couple of girls who acted like this so its definitely not contained to online women.

[@rinothename5563]

In the church parking lot xan? Damn man be sinnin & winnin lol.

[@Notcleverenough]

Church parking lot sex is easily top10

[@_doofiis7420]

Why not? The church is conveniently right there to facilitate the fuck->forgiven->fuck->forgiven workflow

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

@letsTrySelfImprovement 'Twas out of wedlock, so yes, very sinful

[@darlalathan6143]

My first time was with a preacher's daughter! My first boyfriend was a crackhead preacher, lol!😄😁😆😅🤣😂

[@meligoth]

There are two types of women, and I have said this to my girlfriends with no rebuttal for years. One are women raised by supportive parents encouraged that they can succeed and be happy through self worth and hard work. The other are told to find someone to take care of them. The internet put a spotlight on it after centuries with that ideology throughout the world, unfortunately it also exasperated the issue.

[@shizachan8421]

To be honest, economically maybe but emotionally, its actually the other way around. Many men feel entitled for women to mother them.

[@meligoth]

@@shizachan8421 I crossed my mind as I was posting, and you are right that it is not only economical also that it goes both ways. Success and happiness also goes to wanting to raise a family which is a paternal instinct that is perfectly natural. Homemaker or astronaut for either gender? Both are valid.

[@Xenthosis317]

@@shizachan8421 your beliefs and OP's aren't mutually exclusive, there's people of any gender that are emotionally stunted and seek to gain a caretaker through manipulative means.

[@charliekahn4205]

@@shizachan8421 I think this is basically the same phenomenon. Nuclear-family residue seeping in.

[@shizachan8421]

@@charliekahn4205 I mean, its basically patriachy. Women are raised to feel dependent on a men to survive. Men are raised to feel entitled to a women nuturing them. The issue is, that while we have generations of women being teached to develope their own economic and professional aspirations and be self-reliant, we don't have the same for men. Its even controversial to this day to criticize toxic masculinity and maybe raise boys in a way that won't leave them emotionally stunted, entitled and angry for the rest of their lives because that would be beta and soy.

[@darnfrick3354]

*punches locker* *gazes into bruised knuckles* "...Bitches!"

[@Xenthosis317]

We should be focusing on reframing the conversation away from men's problems with women, but as people we should not be tolerating toxic and manipulative behaviors. In reality, these kinds of behaviors are exhibited by people of any combination of gender or sexuality you can think of. The other factor in this that doesn't get mentioned enough is how capitalism commidifies relationships and that drives a lot of manipulative behaviors, and people experience the problems with that in life but lack the means to contextualize it right. Redpill guys like Tate tap into that anxiety and control the frame of the cultural conversation by painting it as men being used by women. Our best shot at collectively resolving these issues is acknowledging the real problems that men have in relationships, and recontextualizing them around the idea of healthy vs unhealthy behaviors.

[@diegorincon4673]

Sometimes people get into relationships without realizing it.

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

Kinda what happened to me. My best friend and I just kinda slowly evolved from hanging out into dating over the course of about a year. We made Valentines our anniversary because we have literally no idea _when_ our relationship went from "just friends" to "couple" so we just picked a convenient date to celebrate it on 😆

[@thefuriousfatty2297]

I think at least a portion of the people that liked the tweet thought that woman was being ironic

[@khill8645]

Yeah, Poe's Law is a harsh mistress and everyone on Twitter is either insane or irony-poisoned. I remember that it got QRTed onto my timeline with something pithy by a woman who definitely thought it was a joke.

[@robbyrobby3447]

literally all of them were lol. any that weren't didn't realize that the original tweet and the replies were making fun of people like them, not actual people like them.

[@NinjaThatLongboards]

I hope that's the case

[@robynsummer7068]

Xan’s been on fire with this content and analysis lately. Keep up the good work!

[@smileyp4535]

I garentee some of these are ironic but that one about the train one made my eyes roll back into my head 🙄

[@coco_rthritis6462]

If you base your political opinions from Twitter then I think you should reconsider that

[@coco_rthritis6462]

I am in agreement with this video to be clear, I mean other circumstances

[@darlalathan6143]

All my Twitter friends are Atheists, Feminists, Transgenders and porn stars-and they're all very nice, thank you.😁🥰😋

[@pessimist1635]

You can never win with these people If you are still interested in them after they've rejected you, that means you're a creep If you lose interest in them after they rejected you, a universal sign that you should move on, and you move on, that means you're an asshole Why are some women like this, they just want an excuse to hate men. They're actually insane

[@donnieconyers2829]

because the more emotional you are the dumber you are.

[@thatindiandude4602]

I don't think a lot of them hate men. To them, to have a guy have a crush on th and leading Men around a leash is a self validity mechanism.

[@donnieconyers2829]

@@thatindiandude4602 aka being a woman for the most part.

[@benjaminjameskreger]

Some women are not like this unless they're irrational, you're describing different groups of women with different opinions, one of which is reasonable and the other is abusive.

[@donnieconyers2829]

@@benjaminjameskreger that is why i said for the most part.

[@VeinyWombat]

I thought she was joking TBH

[@galedribble9535]

Seemed genuine to me

[@VeinyWombat]

@@galedribble9535 I guess, I just don't understand why you'd admit to this

[@galedribble9535]

@@VeinyWombat agreed…neither do I Maybe for attention? Or because she knows other people share her philosophy so no shame in admitting it? Or some combination of both?

[@collinr8678]

Lowkey as an emotional masochist, a part of me dreams about being emotionally manipulated and lead on, only to be made to feel worthless.

[@benjaminjameskreger]

Then find you a dominatrix with an off switch and good aftercare.

[@collinr8678]

@@benjaminjameskreger Honestly, if I ever do decide to start dating, I definitely should look into that. Like I would love someone I love causing pain but I still want the care and attention. Like giving love and then resending it would create a situation where I'm always desperate to win back their love and that would be kool.

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

@@benjaminjameskreger This. This is how you safely and positively engage with such kinks. -a mildly masochistic sub.

[@sunnijo]

Are you sure that original tweet wasn’t a joke? It read like a joke to me, not like the person actually believed what they said.

[@Hazelnutz3]

15:17 damn xan can do a great raiden metal gear impression

[@kaisar3306]

I've seen the post on r/facepalm earlier and...wow the audacity of these women. Also the fact that this is returning to a common incel belief that women are a prize to be obtained and another being that "no doesn't actually mean no" is not getting past me. They are indirectly supporting incel rhetoric and that just scares me a ton

[@thatoneuser8600]

@@blasphimus trust me, it definitely does indirectly support incel rhetoric. Incel posters will screenshot tweets like this and then write a paragraph to their followers of how they shouldn't trust women and all that trash; it's just not good for either side.

[@dylanstacey6782]

4:30 Ex incel here. It's the 80/20 rule. The vast majority of women want the top 20% of men in terms of attractiveness. The incel explanation for why the numbers don't add up is that women settle for men from the 80% if they can't get one from the 20%

[@greenweezing237]

So what made you decide to leave the incel ideology? Do you still believe in the 80/20 rule now, even though it really only applied to a single dating app and nothing more?

[@dylanstacey6782]

@@greenweezing237 I was exposed to actual feminism. My understanding of feminism at the time was purely feminism cringe compilations. I got moved over on several issues gradually as I immersed myself more and more in left wing spaces, realising the mindsets I held were harmful and wrong. I don't believe the 80/20 rule anymore

[@greenweezing237]

@@dylanstacey6782 It's good that you were able to escape the incel pipeline that leads to more pernicious far-right spaces. I was also in a similar position and was able to get out of it through therapy. Really shows why being terminally online is not a good thing lol.

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

@@dylanstacey6782 Glad you managed to climb out of that rabid rabbit hole. We stan growth here

[@AW-zt8iu]

Just go your own way bro

[@beganitdidnt6535]

right time to back it up hit the showers its over

[@dragonborn3609]

It sucks cause I met someone like this. She is a Twitter person but it's worse when it's real life not just online. She would think cause of that she could mess with my feelings and even SAd me. I got away from her but it was scary she was obsessed over me. She looked for so many ways to not let me get over her. It worried me because people like Jordan Peterson and The Quartering use these instances to groom men into being right wingers.

[@ToxicAudri]

Are we sure that it wasn't sarcastic? Kinda how it reads to me, like I've rejected guys before, a few keep trying and trying and I just keep hoping they go away, and when they finally do move on I'm happy to no longer have them trying to crawl up into my pants.

[@ToxicAudri]

There are gold diggers and women that do lead men on for "perks" like getting them to pay for things they want, or whatever, but that's not really how that tweet reads to me, it reads as sarcastic, like "OH NO! I'm so heart broken by the fact the guy I didn't want to be with finally moved on rather than pester me trying to get with me because they think they can get me despite the fact I have clearly showed ZERO interest and have made that abundantly clear to them before."

[@truckerdave8465]

That’s how it sounded to me. 🤷‍♀️

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

It's entirely possible the first tweet was sarcastic, but it brought out sincere sympathies in the replies so I think the overall issue is still pertinent

[@truckerdave8465]

@@sluttyMapleSyrup I agree with that for sure.

[@thefatrat7486]

Toxic people make toxic people

[@wynoglia]

Yea...I saw this posted live....it was weird asf

[@ToxiCancun]

I do think my only gripes is the "This create incel" I think it should be call something else. But it's your video and I am no better. The criticism isn't to be negative of me. I am now subscribed. I think if you stick with the point on incel without dragging women in or have an different title you wouldn't had bad criticism from ppl trying bad faith. I love the video 7/10

[@LoneWulf278]

I see what you’re saying.

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

It's definitely oversimplifying the issue, but I think it's still poignant as well as correct enough to be an acceptable, if clickbait-y, title.

[@ToxiCancun]

@@sluttyMapleSyrup click bait is the best way to get clicks. It's only a problem is it waist time....... poor children😔

[@ToxiCancun]

@@sluttyMapleSyrup to be honest I can't call it click bait though. It is but it still stayed with the message it was giving. So kinda click bait? U have idea what it be called?

[@epicotakugamer4930]

The blackpill is real

[@octosalias5785]

Yes well part of the incel issue on its face is that they want to hold women responsible for how things shake out. Dating has changed, life has changed, I am sometimes accused of being an incel but thats where I do not overlap, youre not going to force anyone to behave when it comes to sex and dating, nor should you really.

[@garethmagis]

Xanderhall or his editor really need to learn that brevity is a skill and the channel would be so much better if he learned that. I know that he has a live stream so there he needs to pad it out but literally 5 mins into the video and not only has he said nothing but I still have no clue what the video is even supposed to be about.

[@fruitcastTV]

Or maybe you just have a 10 second long attention span and need to be constantly stimulated or you take it out on others The info at the beginning is important to the analysis of the video, not my fault you can’t pay attention

[@Zwill1208]

Look Xan I get what you're saying but those tweets are most clearly bait and jokes and you fell for it

[@RudolfKlusal]

Interesting, thank you 🙂 I love your pronuncation, I don't know where are you from exactly, but the way how you say words with "sh" sounds is AMAZING ❤(Situation, definition, ... )

[@darlalathan6143]

In my old life as a man, I was a near-incel, only feminist, Atheist, a straight ally to the Gay Rights Movement and felt unworthy of romance, because I was then an unemployable "mama's boy" after college. Then, my mom got dementia and I had to take care of her. Due to family problems stemming from my career, the above politics and amid-lfe crisis, I went to two different psychologists at as many clinics. The first diagnosed me with Autism. My second diagnosed me with Gender Identity Disorder. Both diagnoses changed my life, surprisingly for the better! First, I went on disability. Then, I began crossdressing secretly and going to a transgender support group my therapist suggested. A year later, I came out of the closet. On my first day out in drag, three people of both sexes told me I was beautiful! A year later, I got a boyfriend! Years after we broke up, i went nightclubbing in girl mode. Cisgender women freak danced with me and made out with me on the dance floor in public! They quickly discovered that I was a pre-op trans woman but liked me, anyway! I had my first gang bang with two cis women in 2019 at a sex club! I'm like a rock star in the Playboy Mansion, now, lol! 😄😆😅🤣😂😍🥰🤩😘😛😋😎🥳

[@adamcy7814]

nigga you ill

[@TheLethalGuy]

What some ppl don’t realize is that when this girl says “Rejecting” she most likely was giving vague answers to keep the guy interested

[@derekperkins57]

I remember my incel days. Now im engaged and more healed

[@mnmnnm586]

NO! I LIKED THIS TWEET! I THOUGHT THIS WAS FAKE!!!

[@Alex-cw3rz]

Brilliant Video thanks

[@ToxiCancun]

I am glad you used the word patriarchy. Altho their maybe fathers & family that enforce an type of standard for the children I can't ignore that government was basically involved for centuries if not menlenioms. I have no idea why I correct that that why the (y) was added to the word.

[@Shadowgrace760]

1:50 Holy shit that’s how I lost my V-card too! Internet High five!

[@showcase0525]

There was some sensible things in this video

[@Nomad11195]

"Then something just happend,i didnt care anymore"

[@emperorblackman5710]

It's heartbreaking to see the kinda feedback loop that something like this can create. Like ok imagine (being charitable) 1% of men in the country are incels and 1% of women act like some of these Twitter examples. With the way that some social media algorithms work (not including incels sharing this content of themselves) what are the odds that this is all they see in social media? A horde of people conditioned to think toxic behavior that takes advantage of people becomes literally all they see and just pushes them deeper into inceldom. Shit's incredibly sad. Toxic shit breeds other toxic shit it's crazy.

[@j.d.s.1837]

*27% of men age 18 to 26 have not had seggs in the US.

[@andypearson7902]

@@j.d.s.1837 that doesn’t mean they are incels, it just means they’re virgins. Incels are specifically virgins who hate women

[@user-ny1wo1vp9r]

Haven't watched the video yet, but I don't think the tweet in the thumbnail was meant to be taken seriously. The way I see it, the woman probably has a small part of her wondering if she made the wrong decision by rejecting him (I'm an overthinker so I can relate) and so she expressed her insecurity on knowing she can't undo that decision, in a tongue in cheek way. At least, that's how I interpreted it.

[@eddiekrustysock4395]

That’s bait

[@embarrassedcap]

I read it with sarcasm, like "oh no... that guy who can't get the picture finally found someone else to bother...boohoo what ever will I do?" but then again idk, it just sounds like a joke to me.

[@wilhelmkreis6578]

Oh y'know it probably is sarcastic

[@user-ny1wo1vp9r]

@@embarrassedcap yeah that makes sense too

[@leikfroakies]

@@embarrassedcap Same. The fact she said 'kept rejecting' made me read it like some guy wouldn't take no for an answer and she's mocking the stereotype of supposedly feeling jealous once they move on

[@cat_city2009]

9:40 I hope you're trolling and you don't actually think that's real.

[@SarxTheJew]

Am I insane in thinking these are mostly facetious? Are there affirmative replies by the OP to the more serious responses? I read this as like, oh no, the guy I keep clearly saying no to took the hint, how will I ever cope 🙄 And that seems like a fair thing to complain about. Am i just totally reading it wrong? It doesn't feel like there's much context presented idk

[@beganitdidnt6535]

it just means if women want to lead you on for clout they can and they will

[@SarxTheJew]

@@beganitdidnt6535 What part? How so? EDIT Wait nevermind I looked at your channel, you're a full TTTTer; learn makeup and start hrt like the rest of us, hon. I was more asking for like, a remotely serious person's opinion

[@beganitdidnt6535]

@@SarxTheJewoh lol i forgot im not in some position of power or have a fancy title which makes my opinion worthy or worth listening to i guess im just a goy nobody i guess

[@beganitdidnt6535]

@@SarxTheJew thats cope and nasty and youre right sorry your majesty i forgot i was speaking to one of the chosen ones

[@skyereeves7014]

I'm going to play devil's advocate for a moment and argue that they were joking

[@connorjones4890]

Dude literally talks like an npc lol

[@tashacooper1753]

I do wish women were not so terrible gotta get our crap together

[@shiloh6503]

I really think that post was intended as a joke. It’s just a variation of the “my man who’s not really my man” trope. I know some people are shitty but I’d bet that the vast majority of people commenting on it are seeing it as a joke. I’d bet that very few women view this seriously

[@mushroomreaper7745]

engagement point

[@ItachiUchiha-sh6of]

Ngl, I still feel like at least the first one was satire. But even if it isn't I can understand the idea behind it. I don't think it necessitates leading someone on. If you are purposely leading someone on then obviously that's bad. I think you can still enjoy the attention or get a kinda ego boost from someone you don't like being into. And you can be sad when they move on while still maintaining health boundaries.

[@ukyoize]

Why do these people not understand that no means no.

[@robbyrobby3447]

Those tweets were sarcastic lol wtf, the likes are real people but it's an obvious joke?

[@SamuraIcarus3]

Man that's for real? I thought it was a bit when I first saw that tweet

[@linkus96]

I'm a 26 year old male, and I have never had sex. Honestly just going to blame Kentucky on this one lol. All the girls I seem too find out here are conservative and religious, Oh well 🤣

[@SuperSuperspoof]

Is it possible some of those tweets were sarcastic?

[@thatoneuser8600]

Even if some of the replies are sarcastic, it's still morally bad to post them because a lot of women who see that tweet wouldn't think they're being sarcastic and like it from a bad viewpoint.

[@THRAKORZOD]

Hey I was just being a total piece of shit ironically

[@SuperSuperspoof]

@@thatoneuser8600 Yes, yes, this is an inherent problem with Twitter.

[@SuperSuperspoof]

@@thatoneuser8600 Of course, some of the likes could be endorsing the sarcasm as well. There’s really no way to know.

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

@@SuperSuperspoof That's the issue with online sarcasm; a thread could be one chud and all Poes or one Poe and all chuds, and the only way to tell is to scan each replying account's profile or post history.

[@XiaoYueMao]

this stuff also runs counter to the issue women always talk about with guys NOT giving up, if a guy keeps coming onto after saying no, we complain, when they stop bothering after saying no.... we complain? online women really do want the cake and eat it too

[@randomthingy4834]

Hiiiiiii

[@JoyfulArtist21]

I do not understand that mentality. If you want a guy to like you and they are already asking you out, just accept! Why the games? And exactly, what is this teaching men? To just keep pursuing someone who's rejected you already? What about women who genuinely aren't interested? How would a guy know to tell the difference? I'm a big proponent of men need to move on if a woman says she's not interested. I told a guy I liked him once, and he said he just wants to be friends. You know what I did? Respected his boundaries. We're still good friends to this day. I didn't pursue anything more, and we still have a good relationship and he appreciates that I respected his boundaries. I would expect the same from anyone.

[@FishSticker]

10:20 is that a rose-tattooed leg

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

If it is then my only complaint is he got one before I could

[@kohai-kun9261]

.... I feel like the original tweet (and most of the subsequent replies) was pretty clearly sarcastic, though :T

[@thecynix4707]

"As a Wite boy I felt entitled to lose my virginity" what does that even mean? He just talks in dog whistles. Cringe to see such a weak self-deprecating boy saying things so others like him. Sad

[@stuffynosepatrol]

Cry more incel

[@thecynix4707]

@@stuffynosepatrol lol.. great comeback. That destroyed my points...hahahaha

[@stuffynosepatrol]

@@thecynix4707 you had no points to begin with so there wasn't much to work with :/

[@thecynix4707]

@@stuffynosepatrol thanks for showing your stupidity.

[@stuffynosepatrol]

@@thecynix4707 once again, you have made a null argument with no evidence. You're delusional, as are most incels :/

[@Sgt-Wolf]

12:13 to 12:33 is getting taken out of context.

[@Soren59]

There was a time a few years back when I was watching a fair amount of redpill / mgtow content, but it did always bother me in the back of my mind how much these people would over-generalise and make sweeping statements about women as if they're all the same. Almost as if their only interactions with women are over Twitter.

[@heavygretal]

FOR THE ALGORITHM! 🤘

[@ToxiCancun]

I only hadn't subscribed because I was taking other ppl words. I am sorry. The video was well meaningful. The title should had been better. (Click bait?) Well it do get ppl attention and I think it's good when it has an point. This video did so I am glad I clicked

[@sluttyMapleSyrup]

Glad you're here! Hope you end up stickin' around

[@ToxiCancun]

@@sluttyMapleSyrup like I said he seem credible. I only have problems with people that bad faith, BURN bridges, propaganda spreading and toxic. I hate controversy. I may sound controversial from times but it is easy to find where I stand.

[@devinpaul9026]

No, I actually am VERY much entitled, as are a large number of guys, whether they know or even care-- they are. Having said that, myself, none of them, and no amassed number of us can FORCE any woman to operate in the manner they are naturally supposed to, nor SHOULD it even be our responsibility to do so if we COULD. But they DO have a natural place and function, and they HAVE fallen far outside of it. Did things operate as they are supposed to, men ARE most certainly owed. Not just a relationship, and not just by women-- but they ARE a rather egregious symptom of a larger problem. Humanity AS A WHOLE does not operate as it is supposed to. Did it ever? I personally don't believe so, but at one time we were a whole lot more in touch with what it was, and maybe on an individual level, some of us even really did. But even that has LONG flown the coop. The very last technical vestiges of it probably rotted off sometime in the seventies, and they were barely even still there by THEN. But whatever else goes on to be said in the rest of this video, what I've watched of the opening is most definitely wrong.

[@tatersalad76]

It's been over a year since you've posted this. I hope you've grown up since then.

[@wfb.subtraktor311]

I am an autist who didnt develop something resembling a proper sexuality until 21 or something and was far closer to "getting pussy" during my time in school than most other dudes. The only reason it didnt happen was that I just didnt compute the very obvious signs thrown at me and genuinely didnt care. I just treated the women in my school like dudes who have different hobbies from mine and that is really all it takes.

[@dasuero7489]

Depends on where you live and the kind of women you were dating and hanging out with such as of course their interests, compatibility with you, etc. So, it's kinda or is different for everybody. I'm ocd and anxiety and most times, girls back in high school couple a years back would ignore me or I'd simply be invisible to them. Then again, I was never really that popular of a kid and student though I had my moments which were few and far in between. Good to hear someone on the spectrum gain a positive and enlightening experience! Kudos.

[@wfb.subtraktor311]

@@dasuero7489 We all have our own struggles, I suppose. Good luck with that anxiety if that is still something you are struggeling with! Since I also deal with social anxiety as part of my autism, I am just gonna share a tip that helps me: Telling people very matter of fact that you are feeling anxiety and how that may influence your behaviour helps a lot in dealing with social interaction. There is less pressure to not be weird because people are already primed and they will generally be a lot more charitable when you do something that is divergent. Most people are actually very understanding when they have something explained up front and they will appreciate the honesty. The people who dont are dicks and werent worth your time and effort in the first place. Hope it helps :)

[@dasuero7489]

@@wfb.subtraktor311 Thanks! Yeah it did help fortunately for you. Yeah I'll try confessing and telling people I have ocd and anxiety. Thanks pal! :) Cheers.

[@denizkaragullu6239]

I would also like this tweet thinking it was ironic tbh lmao. Maybe some of those likes are from women who thought like me?

[@Blissy1175]

A lot of women like this, or at least some of the people that I personally know the reason behind why they behave like this, is because they have trauma in their lives that causes them to be afraid of having "risky" attachments like relationships. One of my best friends is sort of like this, I don't think she actually is self aware enough to realize it tho, because she thinks she can't be in a relationship because she's afraid she'll end up like her mom and grow too dependent on someone else but choose "the wrong person" and be unable to move on while the other person does. So she basically blows her chance and then when they move on it's like a self-fulfilling prophecy that she (or I guess they in the case of all these other people) weren't "meant to be" with them or something, like maybe an inferiority complex, and that they sort of dodged a bullet but also realize that they probably could have been perfectly good relationship material. They're just not ready for a relationship tbh, I don't think I'd equate it to incel guys, because incels have a belief that they're inferior because of the opposite sex's biases - a lot of the times it's more that they're projecting their trauma or insecurity onto every romantic opportunity they get, and is more of an internalized thing that is a lot more self-contained and probably directly related to a singular person that caused them to develop that sort of trauma/insecurity.

[@captainjoy8976]

Internalised mysoginy and sexism at its best :)

[@bethanyoneal5789]

I also did degenerate stuff in a church parking lot at age 18. Good times

[@Wallnuts]

That whole “I realized women are people and suddenly was getting laid” thing makes you sound manipulative and deceptive, as if you used basic human respect specifically for the purpose of getting laid.

[@stuffynosepatrol]

No it doesn't. It means that if you treat women like actual people and not sacks of meat made for your pleasure then women are more likely to sleep with you. If you treat a person like an object then they're less likely to interact with you at all.

[@holdommi7505]

I liked the button and commented the