This Transformed Driving for My Mom

[@suemitchell8495]

I also have driving anxiety but I don't think it's based on the feeling of the other cars being out to get me. From having been in accidents and seen accidents and heard about others' accidents, I'm just hyperaware of how quickly a small mistake can cause an accident, and then it's just up to fate whether you walk away or experience serious consequences. I don't have a lot of hope that I can ever shake that awareness. But your reframing of the hypervigilence as being a danger in itself was helpful to me. My mind does think it's protecting me through this level of alertness and activation, but I think you're right that it actually makes it less likely that I will be able to respond calmly and appropriately if something should happen. Thanks for pointing that out!

[@monicahymas6798]

I've listened to this video a few times now and I think it's so cool. Congratulations to your mom! A couple thoughts. First it's honestly so beautiful to see your love for your mom shining through, as well as your profession as a coach. I'm so intrigued by the careful way you are sorting through this narrative, telling it, unpacking it, and discovering it all at once. It feels so familiar. I'm so happy for your mom and her journey. (I wondered in passing if the breakthrough may have something at least surface-level to do with the difference in driving cultures between the US and Ireland - maybe drivers really are genuinely less aggressive there and that allowed her consciousness to release that insight..?) Speaking of familiar, and of speaking: I'm so reassured by something about the way you talk, the cadence of your voice and your thoughtfulness, all feel so eerily familiar, and I've watched enough of your content now to firmly believe that it's simply a recognition of a neuro-fellow :) Sad I can't come to your class today in person, but I'm looking forward to the replay! Cheers.

[@autismchrysalis]

Awww, this is so touching. Thank you for sharing. I'll pass this along to my mom. Best wishes to you as well! And the replay will be available in a day or two. :)

[@suemitchell8495]

I see this is an old conversation, but I'd like to add something to ponder. Regarding the different driving cultures in the US and Ireland, I wonder if driving on the opposite side of the road engaged different areas of her brain. I think the idea of certain brain functions occurring only in one hemisphere or the other has been debunked, but it still must shake things up a bit in one's thinking to have to switch sides like that. I have never driven in a country with left-side driving, so I'm curious if this sounds plausible to anyone who has.

[@kbailey3238]

Really interesting listen. I have major anxiety driving (UK) and it has limited me so much, so frustrating, so it's so heartening to hear your mum's revelation and subsequent progress. Thank you for sharing 🥰

[@autismchrysalis]

She was glad to share. You're not alone!

[@Paisley...]

❤

[@autismchrysalis]

❤

[@limsalalafells]

I am sorry she experienced greater fear and intensity than intended. I am happy the experience was able to help her and others rationalize, evaluate, and calibrate their stress according to the situation. I have seen some videos and studies on roads. The road just a little wider than two cars and no defined lane can make walking safer. The drivers instinctively drive slower due to a feeling of unsafety if they drive faster. Unlike like a posted speed limit and wider roads where people unintentionally speed as they feel the road is okay at the faster speed. Some people even purpose we shrink roads with planters and such on the sides to control traffic rather than speed bumps and posted signs. Your mothers fear is understandable and potentially the designed intent.

[@autismchrysalis]

Interesting. Though her fear was not originally caused by the road design; it goes much deeper than that, and fortunately is now largely gone. A healthy alertness remains. :)