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Can I become an occasional drinker again? Annie Grace answers.

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This Naked Mind

This Naked Mind

Күн бұрын

Is it possible to become an occasional drinker again? Can I ever become a normal drinker again or have I actually crossed the line to where drinking is now over forever?
Can I Become An Occasional Drinker?
This is an important question and we must start at the beginning to answer it. What was it like when you were an occasional drinker? When you were just drinking on occasion - a glass of wine maybe twice a month? You weren't thinking about it very much and it wasn’t an important part of your life. You absolutely weren't using it on a daily basis to zone out which is in effect self-medicating.
The Slippery Slope
Things get tricky with alcohol when people start drinking socially but then begin using alcohol to relieve stress or to deal with things in their life. As our lives become more stressful you find there’s always a reason to drink and there's always something stressful around the corner. Suddenly you develop an addiction which can make the quest to become an occasional drinker a challenge.
Freedom
In my life freedom comes from not wanting to drink. It’s about going back to not needing alcohol to have a good time - to dance, to laugh, to have fun - and freedom comes from not needing it and not wanting it. Freedom comes from doing all the work and the research to fill the places that I was self-medicating with alcohol with other things. Exercise, meditation, getting enough sleep, reading, self-care - I've become this whole happy person without drinking. I'm not using alcohol to do it -I’m not self-medicating with an addictive substance and I’m not numbing the symptoms.
Getting to know yourself, getting to understand why you're drinking in the first place and addressing those issues in a very mindful way takes a significant amount of work.
Then moving forward into this life where alcohol does become irrelevant because you can't become an occasional drinker when you're using alcohol to self-medicate. If the alcohol is that important to you where you're using it for medicine, occasional drinking won’t work.
One Year
My minimum recommendation is that you need to go through an entire calendar year. You need to be able to commit to a year where you can experience every single calendar event from birthdays to holidays and see how it is without alcohol. The year will give you enough time to really get beyond self-medication. It's going to give you enough time to really learn how to self-care. Self-care for your body, exercise, and nutrition, are natural ways to deal with anxiety and depression. These are things that you can just start to take advantage of right now. It's going to teach you how to regulate and deal with your own emotions without the crutch of alcohol. Something you'll never learn to do if you are continuously drinking to numb your emotions because if you don't feel them you're never going to know how to deal with them.
In The End
In closing, if it’s important to you right now then yes - it's a possibility to become an occasional drinker again. If that helps you get through the first 30 days or the first year recognize it as fear and put that fear away by saying yes. You need to understand having an occasional glass of wine and caring about alcohol little enough to only have an occasional glass of wine is a very different place than drinking every night to zone out.
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Пікірлер: 238
@PutTheShovelDown
@PutTheShovelDown 4 жыл бұрын
‘Freedom comes from not wanting to drink’. Love it 😍
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
It is so true!
@vetreferee
@vetreferee 6 жыл бұрын
"Freedom comes from not wanting to drink." That's beautiful. I will remember that.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
It is so true!
@esmeraldahernandez0404
@esmeraldahernandez0404 3 жыл бұрын
I'm on day 94!!! JUST started sleeping through the night finally.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Yay!! Sleeping is THE BEST!!
@MLove-sb2ye
@MLove-sb2ye 7 жыл бұрын
I'm 3 months sober and it feels great!!!!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 7 жыл бұрын
So happy for you Monica. That freedom is priceless! Have you heard about the Alcohol Experiment I'll be doing? www.alcoholexperiment.com/
@merrysylvia9156
@merrysylvia9156 5 жыл бұрын
Me too!!!👍
@SpiritFitVices
@SpiritFitVices 7 жыл бұрын
I tried after over a year of sobriety. Went way downhill after that, now Im new to sobriety again. All the best to everyone :)
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 7 жыл бұрын
You should join us in The Alcohol Experiment - www.alcoholexperiment.com
@SpiritFitVices
@SpiritFitVices 7 жыл бұрын
I am looking into it now, Thanks !
@ContainedFire
@ContainedFire 5 жыл бұрын
For me the question of whether or not I can be an occasional drinker is simple: I have more important things to focus my energies on than obsessing over having one or two drinks makes me have a problem. It's far easier to just quit it all and devote my attention to bigger things. Such as, deciding how I should spend the few extra hours I have this weekend - growing my business, making art, meeting new people, volunteering, etc. I don't know if I crossed a line with alcohol. But it sure crossed a line with me, so it is out of my life. Good riddance.
@SJ-ih9rw
@SJ-ih9rw 4 жыл бұрын
I can relate.
@jeanetteq6024
@jeanetteq6024 3 жыл бұрын
Yes! Totally agree with this. I'm so over spending time on figuring it out and I'd rather invest my time in other things.
@uptightfreespirit4496
@uptightfreespirit4496 3 жыл бұрын
I love your phrase, "I don't know if I crossed a line with alcohol. But it sure crossed a line with me, so it's out of my life."
@jesusismylord1496
@jesusismylord1496 2 жыл бұрын
Yes quitting for good is the answer because occasionally having one will spiral into a binge
@jamestaylor9537
@jamestaylor9537 Жыл бұрын
I agree ☝️
@janewilliamsyouaresoright9662
@janewilliamsyouaresoright9662 6 жыл бұрын
I'm on day one. after falling and smashing my nose and head, I cried and cried, knowing that I would not have done that we're I not drunk...and it wasn't the first drunken accident. I don't want to destroy my body , my life and my marriage. I've been watching your videos all day and it is helping me. I have a hard time with other philosophies such as AA. Not saying they don't work for others, just not for me. don't like the religious aspect or the shame based way. Thank you so much Annie. I just ordered your book.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 6 жыл бұрын
I hope this is the beginning of your freedom from alcohol.
@RosiesShow
@RosiesShow 3 жыл бұрын
How are you doing?
@sleeplessinstockwell
@sleeplessinstockwell 2 жыл бұрын
@@RosiesShow how are YOU doin :-)
@RosiesShow
@RosiesShow 2 жыл бұрын
@@sleeplessinstockwell I’m on day 84 alcohol free how are you? :D
@sleeplessinstockwell
@sleeplessinstockwell 2 жыл бұрын
@@RosiesShow hi, I’m just starting week 8 today, never done this before and didn’t have a problem so to speak, just a bit bored with hangovers and alcohol interrupting consistency with other stuff I’d like to improve with. Anyway, it’s a fascinating journey for sure. I’m committed to 90days and wouldn’t be surprised if I go way beyond that after. Well done to you
@anniel482
@anniel482 5 жыл бұрын
I think I’m there. Have stopped the nightly 2-3 glasses of wine (with or without friends). I’ve been practicing going out with my friends and not having a drink. I just say I’m taking a break, not drinking during the week. They are somewhat surprised, because I’m known as a fun drinker....I still find the weekends difficult but I keep it to a glass or two at the most. Quite frankly, once everybody gets more inebriated, they don’t even know (or care) what I am doing.
@JM-co6rf
@JM-co6rf 4 жыл бұрын
I'm 3 weeks sober. Finally starting to feel energized and well I often ask myself, "can I ever drink again". The answer for me will be MAYBE....BUT NO MORE buying alcohol and keeping it at home. This is not negotiable. Home is where my alcohol abuse happened. My previous attempt at sobriety (1 year ago, 3 months sober) was destroyed by bringing a bottle of whiskey home for "occasional" use.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 4 жыл бұрын
Moderation is incredibly difficult to maintain.
@jenniferbryan295
@jenniferbryan295 Жыл бұрын
I feel the same. Not sure I'll ever be able to drink at home again.!!
@carlosm9111
@carlosm9111 2 жыл бұрын
“Give yourself the gift of finding out what you’re missing” - I’m not crying you are 😭😭😭
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
@cfdmedicambo68relf7
@cfdmedicambo68relf7 5 жыл бұрын
I like what you say, you don't force your sober Life Style, On anyone and that up for the person to decide if they can be an occasional drinker, I know I can't be an occasional Drinker Again, because it took me a long time for me sober from alcohol, when I prayed to God to take the desire from me to drink alcohol, and God answered my pray, I never want to give back the gift of Sobriety that God Bless me with, I Been Sober Since 07/21/2014
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 жыл бұрын
So happy for you!
@moanaoneil7725
@moanaoneil7725 6 жыл бұрын
Excellent, Annie. I really enjoyed hearing you say “before we even have the right to ask that question (can we drink normally), we need to have a very significant time of being sober and living a life alcohol-free to really explore the reasons why we are not drinking in the first place”. Gosh. Yes. I’m only Day 21 and I’m already thinking that I can have one or two and I’ll be fine. No. I won’t be fine! Not yet. I need to at least live out a year sober so that I can truly sit with life and all its emotions before I can make that call. Thank you for this timely reminder. I will choose to stay sober 🕺🏿
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 6 жыл бұрын
That's the right mindset!
@okolemahu
@okolemahu 2 жыл бұрын
My thoughts exactly! We will make it, we have to as there is no alternative. Thank you again Annie.
@YY6301
@YY6301 4 жыл бұрын
Thanks Annie...asked my husband who stopped drinking for a yr and is now an occasional drinker (once or twice a yr drinker), he gave me the same advice. Really appreciate your work...this year of absolute sobriety is going to be a year of dealing with the root cause of why I self-medicate with alcohol and discovering my true self
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 4 жыл бұрын
Wishing you clarity!!
@jenhasken
@jenhasken 5 жыл бұрын
Excellent video. I am a binge drinker not a daily drinker. But I could not control my drinking and bad things would happen. I am sober now and want to be sober. I just want to emphasize that you don’t have to be using alcohol to self medicate every day to still have a problem with it and decide to live, happily, sober.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
So true!
@brianhoffman8055
@brianhoffman8055 Жыл бұрын
After many false starts finally no desire at all. Your book was a big part of that, thank you! I don’t want to occasionally or mildly poison myself with ethanol.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
So many congrats to you friend! So happy for your freedom!!
@thomaspage2773
@thomaspage2773 3 жыл бұрын
At 15 months sober, I cant even picture drinking again and, I finally think my mind . Is beginning, to think as a non drinker. I wouldn't even want to try and, do it in moderation. Cos it could put me , right back to square one. No way I'll ever want , to put myself in . That position, in a hurry .
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
You wrote on another post you were struggling. Rereading this might help you remember why you're not drinking!
@thomaspage2773
@thomaspage2773 3 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind I can see your point, and I know deep down. Last thing I want to do, is relapse cos . Not only would I feel guilty , awful , of giving Inn. But be throwing away . All the time in soberity, and I read too that . It's really dangerous, for someone who's being off it for long period of time. Cos there bodies , won't be able to handle heavy drinking anymore. and . I'm really scared of that , and next time could be twice as worse. Or I could get alcohol poisoning, which can happen very easily. When I look back now, when I did drink and. Consider myself to be very lucky , to be still be there. Cos many nights, I drank 3 ,4 bottles of wine or drinking a full bottle of whiskey. I know staying off it , is the best thing . I've done in my Life, but it's trying to get my mental state . Back to normal again, see getting sober again . Has definitely left my depression and anxiety worse, my Doctor and Psychologist. Is going to be reviewing my medication soon, cos they think maybe what I'm taking now , isn't working and may . Need to get put on something else . If my mental health, can return back to way it was and the cravings would stop . Then I'd be laughing , but I think that's gonna take a long time. Because Ive been drinking , for 30 years and . That's not gonna leave , my mind anytime soon .
@LunaticAstrology
@LunaticAstrology 2 жыл бұрын
Sober self reflection is such a key piece of the path of an alcohol free lifestyle. I have been experimenting two years now with long breaks (up to three months) from wine 🍷 but then once I drink again it swiftly becomes daily. The two glasses nightly has never progressed to a bottle but I can tell you the low level dynorphin driven anxiety and depression is not worth it. Going for a full year now - reset feb 1 2022. Turning 60 in April and want to be vibrant and healthy for the next 30 years.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Such a fantastic goals to have! Can't wait to hear what discoveries this year brings you!
@cathy3701
@cathy3701 3 жыл бұрын
I've been sober for 3 weeks and am learning that I am not a "moderator" but am instead an "abstainer". If I even consider having a drink, I can see the future as drinking more and more.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Being able to make that distinction for yourself is so valuable!
@jenniferbryan295
@jenniferbryan295 Жыл бұрын
Im 14 days in. I feel great!! Still fighting the cravings some. I hope some day to be able to have a glass of wine, or a beer. Right now though, I want that self relection. Im so happy I found your videos!! Thanks!!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
The journey is so worth it!
@mustafabaris9681
@mustafabaris9681 5 жыл бұрын
If you were able to give it all up and went months , years without alcohol , why would you wanna go back and be under the illusion that you will only do alcohol in moderation ? Occasional drinking will only work until that day at work when you had worst day in your career or until the day when your partner just left you , until the day when hell breaks lose and you feel terrible and on and on an on ... Don’t be illusional and keep that poison away from your amazing life ...
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Sage advice.
@jodeanerhoades2645
@jodeanerhoades2645 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you Annie! I’m at 7 1/2 months with no alcohol. The thought of a glass of wine, terrifies me. I would feel like I would be undoing this hard work. I feel if you have to stop, because of abusing it, I think I would eventually abuse it again, over time.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Having that awareness and making the commitment not to drink will only benefit you!
@willneverforgets3341
@willneverforgets3341 5 жыл бұрын
A close relative of mine did precisely what you are saying, only going to a very occasional drink, but not actually needing alcohol. I am on early sobriety so for me it's 0 or a 1000. so I choose 0.
@cincin4515
@cincin4515 3 жыл бұрын
Yet if your relative really doesn't "need" it, why did they bother going back at all? Seems they "needed" it after all.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Excellent choice!
@Anangelfromabove
@Anangelfromabove Жыл бұрын
I truly feel great on day three. I’m not going to count anymore. Thank you! ❤
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
Great job!
@callmeschoolsout
@callmeschoolsout 5 жыл бұрын
I do admire the velocity of your speech while every word hits the nail on its head! This is certainly the best evidence that there is no substance in your brain that hampers the flow of your thoughts!
@RuachEden
@RuachEden Жыл бұрын
Annie, you're a legend. Thank you for the soul work that you have done and thank you again, even more, for being generous enough to share it with us. You've really helped me. Thank you!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
You're the best! Thank you!!
@julieb.3307
@julieb.3307 3 жыл бұрын
I had four months sobriety. I didn't want alcohol. I was happy. (Your book did that ❤) So I thought I was fine to have just one. It worked on the first 3 occasions... but yesterday one turned into five. 😥
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
A data point you can now move forward from.
@dennis2231
@dennis2231 4 жыл бұрын
I haven't drank in a long time, years. I feel safe with myself around that, in a modest manner. I want to be able to communicate about the risks of alcohol with people I love and you've given me some framing and phrasing to do that.Thank you.
@jovimcsweeney1480
@jovimcsweeney1480 5 жыл бұрын
I'm on day 28 and just had about 3 cravings. My problem is thinking of future events like the wife's 40th in March. .summer time bbqs..a stag ..wedding...foreign holiday etc the never ending list.im struggling with the peer pressure a bit since I've been the party animal for so many years. The thing is its all family i go drinking with. I'm just burnt out from the hangovers and the fog.im aiming for clarity and honest happeniess. It's early days but I'm determined. Your videos are great, thanks.
@jovimcsweeney1480
@jovimcsweeney1480 5 жыл бұрын
Day 99.all good.
@balmaceda01
@balmaceda01 5 жыл бұрын
Same here,congrats.. Going long,going strong!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Would love to hear how you're doing now!
@MichelleFarrismft
@MichelleFarrismft 2 жыл бұрын
Freedom comes from not wanting to drink - that captures the life we can create when we are willing to look to keep doing this work. LOVE it!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Oh - thank you!! Glad it is resonating!
@FELENATOR
@FELENATOR 5 ай бұрын
Your videos are blowing my mind. Everyone told me to read your book and now I know why.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 ай бұрын
Ahh, so humbling to read this!
@adamyelvington4341
@adamyelvington4341 9 ай бұрын
I'm day 39 days of the Path. 61 days AF. Awesome 👍 teaching about myself.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 9 ай бұрын
You got this!
@MagnusAsgeirsson
@MagnusAsgeirsson 8 жыл бұрын
Good stuff. This question keeps popping up in my mind, but you clarified perfectly what needs to take place before you can answer it. PS Thanks for the book Annie, reading it was a real game changer for me.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 8 жыл бұрын
Thank you @MagnusThor
@palndan
@palndan 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with everything you said except, being the first person on the dance floor without a drink. I have read the book 3 times. I have been sober for almost a month except I did have a glass of wine at a dinner party a week ago and I was ok.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
The experience will be different for all of us!
@alexpellizzari9371
@alexpellizzari9371 3 жыл бұрын
when I was drinking occasionally I was smoking pot everyday then quit weed and started binge drinking daily
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
We often transfer addictions.
@willneverforgets3341
@willneverforgets3341 5 жыл бұрын
Very good question: Me, I am not even in a month into sobriety, but if I reach 1 year sober, I am not sure I will risk it by trying for moderation afterwards. I'll see in a year if I am ready or even want to. Maybe I could do it, but we'll see. I agree that at least a significant period of time you need to be able to see life without it, to see if it is worth it or not.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
How are you doing now Will?
@douglaswilliams5794
@douglaswilliams5794 2 жыл бұрын
I figured out after 40 years that alcohol is simply a poison that I do not. I am used to a new normal after 7 weeks. As I said to my doctor, "it is easier to count to zero than some safe amount." But then, the stuff is a poison, so why bother having one at all. I am now understanding my c-ptsd triggers for WHY they exist and WHAT happens when they fire and WHERE my mind should go to. This understanding is evolving from not having alcohol. Your video here is very supportive to my awareness to not have alcohol. Thanks.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Love this "it is easier to count to zero than some safe amount."
@okolemahu
@okolemahu 2 жыл бұрын
Annie you are so right on with all of your words. I am following you and have faith in your philosophy knowing that I will be a better person without alcohol. Please keep up the fabulous work you are doing.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
So glad it is helping you!
@adamyelvington4341
@adamyelvington4341 9 ай бұрын
I was s self medicator. AF is the best for me.👍🙏
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 9 ай бұрын
The best!
@willthomsen7569
@willthomsen7569 3 жыл бұрын
That was REALLY balanced great answer to that question 👍🏻
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Glad it was helpful!
@deanclover3820
@deanclover3820 Жыл бұрын
I just passed one month of no drinking and i gotta say this question has been heavy on my mind. I used to drink so much because i absolutely hated my job and it stressed me out to the point where i couldnt relax at home until i had alcohol. Ive changed my job, spoken with my therapist about harm reduction, and tried so many times to quit on my own, but to no avail. It took getting a dui and pissing off my friends to the point where they almost cut me out to realize i had a problem. Ive relapsed three times since my dui in April and my current sober date is June 19, 2023. I almost relapsed again yesterday and today until i found you! I was pointed in your direction by a kind stranger and have been absorbing as much as i can. I kinda want to be an occasional drinker, to feel normal and fit in, but i also am aware of the fact that because of my tolerance to alcohol, and my history with it (been drinking since i was 2 & im almost 22) its just not possible. I was medicated with alcohol to make me sleep and then in my teen years, guilted into drinking with my stepfather. Ive realized true power is the ability to say no and to move on without it. If in a couple years i feel like i can safely drink a glass of wine i might, but until then i plan on not drinking.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
It's so important to establish those boundaries. And remember that your mindset can shift during that time to where you'll have no desire to drink at all. If you need more support on this journey, please join our amazing free community at thisnakedmindapp.com - the amazing people and resources there can make this experience so much easier!
@robinsmith4958
@robinsmith4958 2 ай бұрын
This was a fantastic video! I have a history of very out of control drinking…..quit for 12 years. Then decided one day I could drink occasionally…… well that last about a month and I was hard core drinking again. Got sober again. Then, couple years ago decided to have an occasional drink again. I’ve been doing that for a while now but honestly….I know why I do it, even if just twice a month, I do it to feel buzzed. I love that first drink buzz, but I only last a couple hours, then the headache and sometimes upset stomach, crappy sleep. And I take medication that alcohol affects. I’m thinking I want to go back to totally abstaining again. Having a drink or 2 sounds like a great idea until after I do it. Even today I was thinking…”Oh I haven’t had a drink in about 3 weeks, maybe tonight I’ll get wine with dinner and have a nice buzz….” Now I am questioning why? Why do I want to feel different? Hmmm 🤔
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 ай бұрын
Realizing that you can get that buzz in a different, healthier way can be a powerful shift. That could be through exercise, great conversation, learning something new, etc.
@robinsmith4958
@robinsmith4958 2 ай бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind Thank you. I do believe I am self medicating. It’s the effect of the alcohol I am looking for. For years I thought that was normal… I thought everyone drank for the effect!
@carkrueger
@carkrueger 5 жыл бұрын
Very truthful, caring and loving response. A high bottom is best. Go for the freedom of a happy life. It is possible.
@peir77
@peir77 6 жыл бұрын
I started drinking every night at home shortly after I lost my licence 2 years ago. It became a glorious time getting drunk and listening to my records.. Until the last couple months when I realized I can't stop drinking 12 to20 beers a night. For the past couple months(the summer), my days have been filled with anxiety over minor issues, until I start drinking again. Every day is planned around where or when I can pick up more alcohol. I would love to go back to drinking just a couple nights a week. That's why I watched this video.
@JM-co6rf
@JM-co6rf 4 жыл бұрын
Here's what worked for me. Make a rule that you will never BUY alcohol and never keep in your house. For me, at home was where I did my alcohol abuse. It wasn't out with friends twice a month.
@ashokrag123
@ashokrag123 3 жыл бұрын
@@JM-co6rf Good advice . i am going to try this. i am 3 full day sober now.
@JM-co6rf
@JM-co6rf 3 жыл бұрын
@@ashokrag123 I'd recommend for sure getting 30 days sober before touching it. I just got off a 60 day sobriety.
@ashokrag123
@ashokrag123 3 жыл бұрын
@@JM-co6rf Sure will do. 4th day now. my goal is first 30 days and see how it goes.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
We would love an update on how you're doing now!
@sandylaramore2248
@sandylaramore2248 Ай бұрын
Great video!❤
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 27 күн бұрын
Glad you liked it!!
@janesmale2254
@janesmale2254 Жыл бұрын
I was AF for 3 years during the pandemic. Thought I’d cracked it. Absolutely not. Started with one or two now back where I started. Don’t start again if you’ve stopped
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
Hope you find your freedom again!
@mikedunker7354
@mikedunker7354 3 жыл бұрын
No don't go back you will regret it!!!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Everyone must make their own choices!
@NB-sq7ui
@NB-sq7ui 3 жыл бұрын
In the UK it's the norm for weekend drinking that's the problem, if your used to socialising at the weekend you have to try and base your life around so.ething else I guess, boredom kicks in too esp if you abstained all week..Most people I know drink to get drunk or tipsy socially..
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Culture can certainly make it more difficult!
@hoboworks2691
@hoboworks2691 3 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind Darn right it can! Our culture completely endorses and promotes alcohol use. It’s in our DNA. Western civilization was created because of our love of alcohol.
@littlegirl3263
@littlegirl3263 2 жыл бұрын
Really good answer to this really good question. Thank you Annie!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@paulbrown5839
@paulbrown5839 2 жыл бұрын
Very good stuff here, makes a lot of sense. Thanks a lot for posting this.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
You're so welcome!
@redbone8844
@redbone8844 11 ай бұрын
I’m 20 days sober and omg I had an amazing time at my cousin 50th birthday party I was on what they call “A pink cloud” I felt like I was drinking and had a buzz I guess I was just high on life! I drove home sober and didn’t have a hangover the next morning I had water while everybody else was drinking 80 proof 40%
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 11 ай бұрын
That's such a momentous occasion! Congrats to you!
@Mr.Gratitude
@Mr.Gratitude Жыл бұрын
Makes a lot of sense. Thank you.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 11 ай бұрын
You're so welcome!
@chrisclark432
@chrisclark432 3 жыл бұрын
This is very good! Some real great points here.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@BunnieD-h4i
@BunnieD-h4i 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you Annie. This video really touched my heart. ❤️
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Honored to hear that!
@susanmiller2370
@susanmiller2370 6 жыл бұрын
I’m so glad a found you at The Addiction Summit. You are wise and inspiring.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@dalekennedy6641
@dalekennedy6641 4 жыл бұрын
This is the best one so far for me, thank you
@sam-goldfinch
@sam-goldfinch 8 жыл бұрын
This is a fantastic video, thank you :) it's such an amazing synchronicity for me to find it today. Thank you for your book and your videos Annie!!!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 8 жыл бұрын
Thank you @Sam
@dwdrumshdmotorcyclesvirgom7379
@dwdrumshdmotorcyclesvirgom7379 3 жыл бұрын
I love your channel and how you approach drinking. Your very nice looking too BTW. Thanks for all you do!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
So nice of you
@davesage4931
@davesage4931 8 ай бұрын
There’s a scene in the movie Swingers where the guy is asking his friend if his ex girlfriend will ever call him again. His buddy says “oh she will call, but not until you sincerely don’t care that she calls.” And he says “that’s the rub huh”. I think of moderation the same way. It’s ok as soon as you don’t care if you ever have a drink again. But if you don’t care if you ever have a drink again, why would you have one? That the rub. 😊
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 8 ай бұрын
Perfectly explained! That IS the rub!!
@jamestaylor9537
@jamestaylor9537 Жыл бұрын
❤I had 30 years sobriety loved 🥰 it, started doing just this. I’ve gotta stop drinking period
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
You got this!
@cliffordslapper
@cliffordslapper 6 жыл бұрын
Annie, I think all of your writing and speaking is fantastic, extremely helpful and makes more sense about the true nature of addiction than most other sources, "experts" and "fellowships". Thank you. One question. What would you say to someone who has succeeded in overcoming all of the false reasons for drinking and for thinking that it will help, except for one situation: going on a date! A shared bottle of wine is such a reliable ice-breaker to both get through the shyness and awkwardness of getting to know one another, and also, dare I say, of releasing our inhibitions in order to explore more intimacy! There must be a better way, but what is it? And if the person one is meeting is themselves a "normal" drinker, using the usual "ice-breaker" drinks, won't they be thrown off by meeting someone who proceeds to order tonic water whilst offering them wine? Such a minefield!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 6 жыл бұрын
Personally I'd make the initial meeting occur somewhere where alcohol won't be on the menu. Get breakfast together, coffee or choose an active date. Lots of laughs can be had while miniature golfing or even ice skating. Once you've broken the ice in a way that doesn't involve alcohol it isn't as awkward to turn down that drink later.
@cliffordslapper
@cliffordslapper 6 жыл бұрын
Thanks for taking the time to reply. I have just started reading your book, which is excellent. On my specific question, your answer is very helpful, but my concern was not so much about avoiding awkwardness over turning down a drink, but more the fear that without alcohol on the first few dates it is less likely to become an intimate relationship. Is there any other solution to that? Thanks.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 6 жыл бұрын
Alcohol actually lowers libido so I wouldn't stress that. I think meaningful conversation with you present would go a long way in creating an intimate relationship.
@rollandjoeseph
@rollandjoeseph 2 жыл бұрын
I've been asked this by friends "are you gonna go back to drinking now that its been x months "? "Why not have a glass here and there"? And now knowing the psychology behind alcohol,( thx annie) , it annoys me hearing those questions..I was just asked last night" do you want us to wait for you ( when I'm "done" not drinking) to open that nice bottle of wine you brought over ?" I smiled and said" no, enjoy it, don't wait for me" ... an obvious " indescript " way of seeing if i had plans on going back to drinking🤭..silly rabbit!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Changing our relationships with alcohol makes other people take a look at their own which can be an uncomfortable process.
@tiffany8207
@tiffany8207 Жыл бұрын
Hi Annie, I just ordered your book.. I have a problem with drinking beer every night. More habit for me, started out a few here and there and then now like 4 beers to 6 a night manly 4 tho.. I started having stomach problems from it, keeps me up all night.. no sleep and lots of acid pills. Just lost my gallbladder to inflammation because I'm pretty sure it has been messing with my stomach that bad. Tons of stomach issues. I no now its definitely making me unhealthy. Don't want my liver to go next. So I'm really hoping your book will help me. I don't like being "that person" around my family/friends either. I've tried moderation I always rebound back.. Need to cut it out for good. Thx for your advice on you tube. I'll be watching them all. 😊❤️
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
So glad you're here! Have you joined the free app for more support? thisnakedmindapp.com
@lidamooini2064
@lidamooini2064 3 жыл бұрын
Another amazing video! LOVE this lady! Xxx
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
So happy it's helping you!
@lidamooini2064
@lidamooini2064 3 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind Your wisdom, your humor, open mindness, truly amazing. You are such a gift to the world and YES you help a lot, love the book also xxx
@cfdmedicambo68relf7
@cfdmedicambo68relf7 5 жыл бұрын
I say like my A.A. Sponsor Told, You Have to Smash The Thought Of Trying to be an occasional Drinker, because I know for me to drink again is to die, Once A Alcoholic Is Still Is A Alcoholic, So I Pray to Stay Sober, Forever 1 Day At A Time
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Glad you've found what helps you!
@stephenfermoyle4578
@stephenfermoyle4578 3 жыл бұрын
i don't think so!!! but who am i to say !! why ruin a good thing and your skin and liver will thank you Apple Cider Vinegar in water tastes kinda yukky at first.... but really helps make your insides clean thank you for all your great advise and tips
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Fair enough!
@Mamma-Tex
@Mamma-Tex 4 жыл бұрын
Don’t wake the alcohol monster !
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
NEVER!!!
@tommyfeagle689
@tommyfeagle689 5 жыл бұрын
Great advice! Thank you!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
So welcome!
@tunafish8769
@tunafish8769 3 ай бұрын
If I have to control it I won't enjoy it. If I enjoy it I can't control it. 30 days sober today and I'll be damned if I go back to that drunken hell. Not one drop more!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 ай бұрын
Cheering you on all the way!!
@SuperTerminator50
@SuperTerminator50 5 жыл бұрын
People with a drink problem, do not have a choice, the Alcohol chooses for them..One drink leads to many drinks...
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
We can agree to disagree!
@victoriaoshea4865
@victoriaoshea4865 5 жыл бұрын
So smart
@Noname-em6pe
@Noname-em6pe Ай бұрын
My problem is i have never been a moderate drinker. I always binge drink even if it started out once a month or whatever. I have never been able to just have 1-2 or even 3 drinks. Ive always just drank until i went to sleep. I go through phases were i will only drink once a month and then it slowly progresses to almost everyday- even if that process takes 6-7 months i always end up there. I dont think i will ever be able to be a moderate drinker and im trying to process and work through that. Im only at the beginning of TNM journey.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Ай бұрын
Hope you've found the Companion App - thisnakedmindapp.com - for support and encouragement. The beginning of the journey is a great first step!
@jasminemariedarling
@jasminemariedarling 5 жыл бұрын
How do you deal with underlying issues? How to do that work? I've done the 12 steps, I've been sober for 5 years but I miss drinking. I work out regularly, I've started a business, gotten married, good life, still miss drinking.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 жыл бұрын
in my experience it has to do with determining why you drank and working through those emotions and the beliefs that alcohol helped with that somehow.
@Adam-gb9gf
@Adam-gb9gf 3 жыл бұрын
I can relate to all of this. So true what you said about "occasional drinking" not being adequate to suppress your emotions. I don't understand though how someone can go 6 years sober then revert back to it?
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Often it's triggered by another trauma and we pick the response that worked before because we never developed the additional coping skills needed.
@leetarrant7311
@leetarrant7311 2 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind yes annie that as what as always happened with me ,im currently 9 months AF ,both my parents are having really serous health problems i don,t have any siblings and im have to deal with this situatin alone,im struggling,i just want to dissapear and im very close to saying f**k it and feel its only a matter of time before the pressure becomes to much for me and i drink again.any adivce would be very helpfull
@derekprinceweems
@derekprinceweems 3 жыл бұрын
You. are. fire!👈🏿💪🏾👊🏾✌🏾
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@matthewdickinson1102
@matthewdickinson1102 4 жыл бұрын
You are so cute!!!
@stangedude5646
@stangedude5646 Жыл бұрын
Yes, you can be an occasional drinker if you exercise control.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
Some people do find success with occasional drinking.
@stangedude5646
@stangedude5646 Жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind I have no control tho.. lol.
@brentstafford6289
@brentstafford6289 Жыл бұрын
I tried to become a “ normal” drinker , and went right back to full on abuse again ! And it’s seeming harder to get away from it this time ! If your having a problem with alcohol put it down and never go back because it is there right now waiting to drag you down to the pit !
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
So glad you found what you needed to do to have your freedom from alcohol!
@ciaranmac8689
@ciaranmac8689 2 жыл бұрын
Iam a binge drinker I hate it after when I do it every 6-9 weeks for 3 days it takes a week to recover right it's madness, I really love excerise running boxing weights I train 6 days or 5 a,week I follow a good diet, but when I drink 3 days all out the window I dmoke eat shit and drink loads, I'm hoping to stop this a finally just put it away, I'm 46 and no deep down Its tome to stop it.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Have you checked out the This Naked Mind Companion App? thisnakedmindapp.com - you might find it helpful in stopping!
@SuperTerminator50
@SuperTerminator50 5 жыл бұрын
Problem drinkers can NEVER EVER go back to Alcohol at any time or any Quantities..Period..furthermore why would any body want to go back to Alcohol after a long period of sobriety?..
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 жыл бұрын
There are those who are able to successfully moderate if they choose to.
@RB621337
@RB621337 5 жыл бұрын
Yh bollocks Craig I binged on and off since 18 I’m 25 now, mind over matter, enjoy a sensible drink with dinner now
@SuperTerminator50
@SuperTerminator50 5 жыл бұрын
@@RB621337 Good for you, so far, let me know how the next 50 YEARS GO?
@jasminemariedarling
@jasminemariedarling 5 жыл бұрын
I've been sober for 5 years. I was a heavy drinker in my 20s, was depressed, no social skills. I've worked on myself over the years, I'm not depressed anymore, I enjoy my life but am now contemplating an occasional drink to relax on vacation and I miss the super happy feeling alcohol gave me. I'm probably not going to try moderate drinking, but it is tempting!
@SuperTerminator50
@SuperTerminator50 5 жыл бұрын
@@jasminemariedarling You have done brilliantly, stay sober, you will NEVER be able to moderate your drinking, Alcohol is the second most addictive substance on the Planet..
@adamyelvington4341
@adamyelvington4341 9 ай бұрын
For me, i tried , moderation, occasionally drinking. Didn't work for me. modrs
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 9 ай бұрын
It's so difficult!
@bjb0808
@bjb0808 5 жыл бұрын
I don't think I can never not enjoy the effect of alcohol
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 жыл бұрын
You'd be surprised!
@antkn33
@antkn33 4 жыл бұрын
If I can, you can. Believe me.
@jakemaxwell2800
@jakemaxwell2800 2 жыл бұрын
Everytime I have said I'll just have one, I have ended up blackout drunk
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Important lessons learned from that!
@easternsunguitarist5791
@easternsunguitarist5791 5 жыл бұрын
What do you think of using Antabuse as a means to stay sober??
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 жыл бұрын
I think everyone needs to do what works for them.
@janesmale2254
@janesmale2254 Жыл бұрын
I don’t think your advice on trying drinking again is good. I was 3 years sober. Thought I’d got control. Absolutely not. Month ps later struggling to stop again
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Жыл бұрын
It's certainly not a requirement to do so.
@kaitlynanita448
@kaitlynanita448 3 жыл бұрын
I’m 18 days sober.. :) trying hard to stop
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
You've got this!
@kaitlynanita448
@kaitlynanita448 3 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind Thanks you I am 28 days now 🥰
@betaren21
@betaren21 2 ай бұрын
“You’re not on a neutral path here.”
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 ай бұрын
So many takeaways!
@MattMendians
@MattMendians 2 жыл бұрын
Did you have to go to rehab to safely get over the physical addiction?
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
Not necessarily. Some people can do a medical detox under the supervision of a physician. You'd need to consult with your doctor to see what would be recommended for you.
@MattMendians
@MattMendians 2 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind My doctor knows I drink a lot of beer and has it in my notes. A while ago and he wrote it down to try and slowly week by week cut down. Unfortunately I really haven’t done a good job with it. He’s wanting me to send a list of psychiatrists that excepts our insurance. So no he didn’t even say quite cold turkey
@travisyuga
@travisyuga 4 жыл бұрын
Question for Annie or anyone who has thoughts on this matter? I am wanting to go AF for a year starting Jan 1. However, I have been keeping this thought to myself and am wondering if I should share this Goal with my wife or keep it to myself? I recently heard, in a TedTalk I believe, that sharing your goals with others sometimes negatively affects the outcomes due to the sensation you receive when the other person congratulates you or gives you a pat on the shoulder for simply setting the goal. I I am also nervous to share this goal with my wife because if I slip up and decide to have a drink I will feel like I not only let myself down but my wife as well. Any thoughts/suggestions/feedback welcome here...thanks!!
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 4 жыл бұрын
I think its a personal decision. I always say you can share how little or how much you want to with others.
@travisyuga
@travisyuga 4 жыл бұрын
This Naked Mind well that’s a super vague answer but you’re right...it’s a personal decision. I’ll just pray on it. Thanks and Merry Christmas 🎄🎁
@user-br4te4qg5t
@user-br4te4qg5t Ай бұрын
Definitely not why would you want to swap sobriety life to feel hung over not able to cope or manage anything so no no no
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind Ай бұрын
Often people need to have the experience to cement that mindset shift.
@toddfederman2372
@toddfederman2372 2 жыл бұрын
The question in state is why did you poison yourself with neurotoxins.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 2 жыл бұрын
^^this
@MattMendians
@MattMendians 4 жыл бұрын
I think if I stop cold turkey I would be really taking a chance since I’m on a bunch of prescription meds for anxiety, blood pressure due to anxiety. I have talked to my doctor many times and he is well aware of my dependence on beer. However I have always had a bad general anxiety disorder way before I ever drank.
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 3 жыл бұрын
You should consult with your physician of you're concerned.
@MattMendians
@MattMendians 3 жыл бұрын
@@ThisNakedMind I did. He said I should try and slowly cut down
@casper1240
@casper1240 8 ай бұрын
Have one glass of wine then you decision making is taken over by the little monster on your back you have no choice but to carry on the addiction takes you over after one glass of wine
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 8 ай бұрын
This 100%!!
@LITTLEEXPERIMENTCHANNEL1
@LITTLEEXPERIMENTCHANNEL1 5 жыл бұрын
how do we deal with the boredom?
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 5 жыл бұрын
This video addresses that - kzbin.info8eXN3glpgak/
@ThisNakedMind
@ThisNakedMind 8 жыл бұрын
What do you think about doing a 30 day challenge? Have you heard of the guys at OneYearNoBeer - They do a 30 day challenge with a FB support group that people love. You may want to check them out to get you over the hump! It's all free and really great. The website is www.oneyearnobeer.com
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