TIL 003 : Is Same Sex Attraction Sinful? (feat. Dr. Denny Burk)

[@jacobgraf7284]

This is an interesting perspective. However. I think that you might be assuming that both opposite sex attraction and same sex attraction are rooted in the same core psychological desire: intimacy and sexual activity. That desire is certainly present in most healthy opposite attracted people, but I think the roots of same sex attraction (SSA) are a bit different. Now, I am going to speak on male SSA (female SSA has many more layers and much more complexity). The testimonies of thousands of men at Living Hope Ministries and the Breakthrough Clinic would suggest that male SSA at its core is a desire for the guy to find acceptance and (nonsexual) affection from men he perceives as strong and masculine. Likely, the same sex attracted men grew up without receiving or perceiving much affection and affirmation from their fathers and male peers. All boys need those things. That desire for male affirmation will continue to play itself out until it is genuinely met, and it can only be met through (nonsexual) attention from and friendships with strong male role models. During puberty, the sexual hormone release combines with the unmet needs for male affirmation, attention, affection, and acceptance, thus creating an arousal response to other males. In this way, the subconscious mind prioritizes the foundational same sex bonds over the unnecessary opposite sex bonds. I would say that SSA becomes sinful when the person misinterprets it and fixates on it as being an urge to have sex with the object of their attraction. Essentially, male SSA at its core is just a longing to meet a basic childhood need for masculine love. Simply trying to pray away or study the Bible away the SSA will probably not work. Yes, God could immediately make someone's SSA go away, but He probably will not. Instead, He often lets people with SSA work through their underlying issues (male detachment and gender insecurity) as a work of faith, and their SSA often dissipates on its own. I don't think that SSA on its own can be considered sinful but rather the interpretation one assigns to his SSA might be sinful. Now, I am not going to claim that what I have said about the causes of SSA is 100% guaranteed to be true. It relies on tons of anecdotal evidence and some peer reviewed studies, but it is what I have come to believe as true, given my understanding of God's design for masculinity and femininity.

[@gez7607]

There is a danger when you start to conflate lust and attraction as if they are the same thing. Same sex attraction is basically someone who does not experience the natural opposite sex attraction but instead they are drawn to the same sex. It does not therefore mean they are lusting and having an uncontrollable desire. It just means they are not attracted in the normal way to the opposite gender. Lust and sin begins to take place when you instead start to imagine and desire sexual intimacy with them - NOT the attraction itself.

[@Twisterbeast]

I love this. Yes, it is truth, I have no lust for anyone, I appreceate women's beauty and way of being a lot more than men. I am capable of loving her forever without ever touching her at all.. I have struggled to understand the difference of SSA and a homosexual life-style but now I am kinder to myself knowing that My identity is in Christ only and finding women more attractive does not mean I am sining or that I am Gay.

[@mcdfood]

Good material, thanks for posting this.