tim hawkins christian cuss words

[@JoshMcSwain]

Son of a motherless goat was my favorite. His delivery is fantastic, he could read the phone book and it would be funny.

[@bubbsmaster1222]

It's from the film 3 amigos

[@simonsmith2779]

I love them all. And you're right. The guy is a fartknockin' genius,

[@pepper341]

+Simon Smith 😂

[@damiensvanderputten5930]

Josh McSwa

[@guitarhero4762]

Josh McSwain Mine was Turd.But I loved shut the front door.And Son of a Motherless goat.THERE ARE SO MANY

[@amyholmes4941]

My grandma used to say "my cow." If she was really upset, she would say "My cattle and sheep!"

[@livin4thelamb499]

That is just precious, :D

[@cameronshultz6105]

HAHAHAHA!!!! So funny! My favorite was Saint Jack. Tim hawkins, you were that kept me going when my grandma was in the hospital dying. She passed away May 28 2014, the worst day of my life. But it was you who kept me going. THANK YOU TIM HAWKINS!! KEEP IT UP!!!

[@howllabyshadection328]

One of the best comedians of all tie and he's a christian too :) Tim Hawkins never gets old!

[@redbead3448]

"Hey yo mama made crud muffins, come on in! I love mama's crud muffins!"

[@krystalharwood7842]

he literally sounded like larry the cable guy

[@WaltzingAustralia]

Brings to mind two things. My brother, when a teenager, would say to someone who had offended him, "Go grind your teeth on the curb." That usually ended the discussion. My nephew, my brother's son, when he was four years old, would always correct anyone who said "holy cow," saying, "No, just cow. Only God is holy."

[@threePwny]

Cows are holy in India. And they can be quite holey. Though the latter is a little gruesome...

[@adammilette3076]

You've ever heard of a curbstomp? I'm sure he has

[@WaltzingAustralia]

No, cows in India are sacred, not holy.

[@threePwny]

The two are essentially synonymous. Holy, most literally (as far as original Bible languages goes), means set apart or exalted. Most dictionaries, including Merriam-Webster, list holy and sacred as synonyms. And if you want to get really pedantic, even within Christianity, God is not the only holy entity. He's three of the only holy entities. And He makes us holy, as well.

[@WaltzingAustralia]

Not really the same. One is inherent, the other imputed. God is holy, even if there were no one to worship him. It is his character. With cows, those who worship them attribute sacredness to them.

[@arkhambricksskylar]

Son of a baptist preacher

[@franciegwin]

Oh yes!!! Oh dated one of those once!

[@panheadmaniac2409]

I don't know how many times I've watched this by now, and it's still just as hilarious.

[@KathrineJKozachok]

i've gotten people at work to start saying "Oh, Pickles!"

[@pepper341]

😂 thats awesome

[@beccadavis2287]

Where's Cottonheaded Ninimuggins??!

[@Prior2Popular]

OMC YEAH

[@RinJackson]

........wut?

[@josephwhiteside834]

You're not a Cottonheaded Ninimuggins, you're just... special. Love that movie.

[@connordilworth64]

Becca Davis I get it

[@TheSchuchmans]

UGH! WHAT MOVIE??

[@BreeNix]

“Son of a motherless goat” *everyone dies of laughter, including Tim* “that’s not even possible” XD

[@nataliewyatt4258]

I have actually used Son of a Motherless Goat. I got the strangest looks when I yelled it out in class o-o

[@melissaostrihon1781]

A co-worker once said "Mother-father sister-brother". I laughed for days!!

[@krystalharwood6359]

im a mother father gentleman

[@kellyrussell6428]

He reminds me of Robin Williams here.

[@krystalharwood2300]

+kelly russell he reminds me of my pastor too. he's funny as....heck! gotcha!

[@krystalharwood2300]

+kelly russell and peter from everybody loves Raymond. RIP

[@christianbrown5363]

+kelly russell Tottaly

[@menslady125eif2590]

+kelly russell They were both able to make funny fart jokes.

[@menslady125eif2590]

Chazraith Shut up!

[@pretoshohmoofcguy6523]

He forgot Duck Dynasty's "Oh good night".

[@geoffreynesmith4866]

Just seen him Saturday in Woodbridge VA, Oh my goodness he was funny. People were laughing so hard they were crying. I laughed so hard had a headache the next day. It was really nice to see clean humor!

[@iwrotesalutaris]

What the House of Representatives sounds like during a debate . . .

[@entjtype1250]

GENIUS

[@fumbledpersonality]

+Gev Sweeney using this.

[@thebeast6634]

im a gringo

[@GalaxyGal-]

I miss the good ol days when the house meetings were basically wwe fights.

[@jeenashirkey1987]

Lol

[@exarsunrider6468]

Who else started crying in the 'crud muffin' bit?

[@EmergencyDrawings]

Some kids from my Church brought me hear and now I am going to watch more of his videos 😂😂

[@rockon54635]

Tim Hawkins is one of the best funny guy ever this made me laugh

[@wigmomm]

FART KNOCKER!!! It's my favorite one

[@stayceachziger4708]

J Wigton its my favourite as well. every time i watch this video i die laughing just because of fartknocker.

[@malsalada]

This made me laugh so hard! I had a hamster when I was a little girl. My dad became quite attached to the little guy. I don't remember what his real name was, but I do remember that my dad always called him "fart knocker". Thank you for digging that old memory out and brushing the dust off. :)

[@krystalharwood5240]

worse than fleabag!

[@aliciajo4618]

My friend and I use "son of a baptist preacher" and "son of a motherless goat" all the time 😂😂😂

[@kellysong2256]

I grew up Mormon, and we were famous for saying, "Oh my heck", flippin' and fetchin' 😂

[@aceofspades6161]

sad thing is, I've used all of them.

[@aceofspades6161]

Bolshevik my favorite one

[@emeraldayres1546]

+Ace of Spades SAME!!!! :D

[@menslady125eif2590]

That's not sad. It's great!

[@jennakaufman4471]

Ace of Spades good part is u didn’t really swear, u swore in Christian pg

[@orochimaruorochimaru4031]

Space of aids So have i

[@4x4dually]

My son asked me the other day what a "fart knocker" was after I called him that. Now I have a better explanation. LOL

[@nicolehale7790]

Son of a two timing rainbow or my personal favorite: Sportacus!

[@kathyrodriguez3554]

fart knocker😂😂

[@somedoomermetalhead7377]

Kathy Rodríguez my moms boyfriend calls me fart knocker all the time

[@dannny_macdee1015]

Beavis called B utthead that all the time lol

[@maxharter5716]

@Reese Ciddio 2:16

[@ashermobley7041]

Fart Knocker, Buckethead, and Crud muffins!

[@memerejcc2172]

"son of a motherless goat" is a line from the movie 'the three amigos' with chevy chase, steve martin and martin short. my siblings and i used to say that all the time we thought it was hilarious.

[@2sam12_3nathan]

His comedic timing is the best, ❤ 😂😂great voices, love the different accents

[@JeffBainMusic]

Tim...this is the FUNNIEST thing I have EVER seen from you!!! I was laughing SO HARD through this whole video!!! God Bless you Tim! (You son of a motherless goat!) HAHAHAHAHA!!!

[@lunar4815]

I couldn't stop laughing when he said fart knocker! lol

[@mrssiordia06]

That one was mine!!!!!!!

[@jonathanbeasley489]

I have a GREAT ONE for you that my Grandpa used to say "GOT DANDRUFF, SOME OF IT ITCHES!!!"

[@mattjames5694]

I'm going to use this. Thank you!

[@gremcs]

My favorite part was when he started laughing at 3:18 when he said "Shut your pie-hole."

[@krystalharwood2300]

+GremlinboyFH kiss my grits sounded a lot like my pastor

[@scorchflare5765]

At 3:18 he sounded like Venturiantale (Jordan)

[@aimeefunk6576]

I don't understand why people cant just enjoy what he is putting out for the public to ENJOY, if people don't like his videos then you really shouldn't watch them.

[@rcknrol1]

My dad used to say "Jiminy Christmas."

[@shouttothelord77]

I saw both Tim and Bob Smiley last night and they were hilarious! Tim is even funnier in person lol! :-)

[@miserymade9891]

my mom says crapolla a lot XD i have heard a few of these and this is so funny.. my favorite is son of a motherless goat

[@elissamagnuson4084]

*stubs toe* "PAT SAJAK*

[@kellisearcy7996]

He missed one of my favorites...Wack-Bag!!!! Hahaha had me dying!!! Turd. Hehe 😆😋😏

[@maryannwolowski8496]

I am laughing so hard right now !

[@bethanysmith5856]

part of the fun of this is watching my brother dying each time we watch this

[@larrylentini5688]

HOLY CRUD MUFFIN! I'VE GOT TO MEMORIZE THESE!!!

[@pgoldbranson2480]

Shut The Front Door!!! haha....TUURRD.....love these! so funy and true

[@AugustMilli]

Haha! And all these years I thought I was the one that made up "crud muffins" lol

[@krystalharwood6359]

holy cricket!-Harry Potter

[@cindykeith3423]

My son says "cheese n rice" when he's mad instead of "Jesus Christ". 😕

[@maddie4582]

That's cute

[@krystalharwood1807]

how bout the pizza substitution- Cheeses Crust

[@brittanyhagston4765]

Krystal Harwood or Cheese its

[@krystalharwood1807]

@@brittanyhagston4765 that too

[@tanyahaskin6607]

Not a fan...my kids used to say it, too 😕

[@mistergamerguy]

This is a better version of a video I seen recently. FART KNOCKER!

[@yoshikagekira5667]

Son of a motherless goat XD

[@KrystalHarwood-z1b]

i never got the rosafrosarosafrasa part until i remembered Harry from Home Alone! lol

[@lucasfain4465]

HAHAHAHAHA. I like the CRUD MUFFIN. alsoooo..... WHAT THE JEFF WITH A CRUD MUFFIN

[@saracathcart9955]

2:16 I USE FART KNOCKER XDDD

[@KrystalHarwood-z1b]

RIP Bob Barker

[@KrystalHarwood-z1b]

Alex Trebek

[@niamhhunter5840]

Son of a motherless goat!!!! my fav

[@JohnRobenault]

Every time I watch him, he gets funnnier!

[@saracathcart9955]

Here's another few for ya'll, not sure if it was on the list: "poo on a stick" "fart nugget" "river stonker" "shwat" just some I use haha

[@MichaelMoore99]

My favorite is one kids at the Christian school I went to came up with: "Cheese and Rice!"

[@pikagelly7465]

When I cuss (usually by accident), I change it up a bit 1. Son of a Biscuit! 2. What the Fudge?! 3. Crap 4. Fudge 5. Freakin' 6. Hades (instead of Hell) 7. Good Lord And so forth... What is sad is that I know more curse words than my younger sisters, yet not once have I used them as casually as they do. 😟I mean I could, but let not foul language come forth from your mouth (sorta like that; from the book of James somewhere)

[@peachesncharlotte]

PikaGelly I've only cursed twice in my lifetime, and I still regret it

[@pikagelly7465]

@Peaches n Charlotte Yeah, if I slip up just one word, I feel the utmost guilt, but then there are those who use it basically as a second language😓 Sad, really😟

[@peachesncharlotte]

it is (i honestly dont understand, cursing makes me feel weird and uncomfortable)

[@tiffanyrider3380]

Peaches n' Charlotte kjuqie we get to p

[@orochimaruorochimaru4031]

Seidian-Belle Causey Do you even english?

[@Bosco1965]

He missed "God...bless America"

[@76bbqueen]

7 words - the clean version..I hope. LMAO! This is awesome!

[@jaxoncroydon3516]

im christian but i do say cuss words so this is funny to me

[@hannahb8775]

how are you a christian if you cuss?

[@juliadeemer2070]

Hannah B It happens sometimes we slip don't judge

[@KrystalHarwood-z1b]

everyone does. its hooman

[@PharaohFluidity]

Benedict Cumberbatch.

[@thebeast6634]

+KᗩYᒪᒪᗩᗰᗩ TᕼE ᑭᕼᗩᑎGIᖇᒪ (Kaylah) chorizo

[@GuessWhoTheDoctor799]

+scubadrew9292 Lol a friend of mine calls him Bendydick Cumberbatch. Sorry, I just thought I'd share...

[@HiiroRocker101]

+BonziBUDDY Boop-a-doop Shoop-da-woop

[@makennaf3398]

scubadrew9292 his name is a perfect cuss word

[@Nick94956]

Chris Plays Games I think I get that reference haha

[@sheneallread2833]

Son of a biscuit eatin' bulldog is one of my favorites 🤣🤣

[@jjcevering9411]

These funny words bring a lighthearted air to what could be a destructive moment. Sense of humor...I believe I've seen God's sense of humor in life. Burps... farts.. Gleeks...etc. He is very fun and wants us to remain childlike. Not terse or bitter. 💜🎶💙🎶💛🎶❤

[@KrystalHarwood-z1b]

although he can pull back the covers! haha

[@songsalieri]

i just use the name of a local business I kept hearing on radio ads growing up: Fracalossi Chevrolet

[@sierrazurek9644]

This has to be my favorite Tim Hawkins video

[@oliviawilliams5138]

son of a motherless goat you are awesome tim hawkins

[@erinnikoal4611]

JUMPING JUNE BUGS OF GOSH GOLLY

[@annieelizabethdecker4243]

This is the best thing I've ever seen

[@WaiferThyme]

hahaha this is awesome! my favourite cuss to use is son of a pickle!

[@ksd56]

One of my favorites that I learned at my Christian college....PeePee DooDoo Dadburn Butt. Stuck with me still 46 years later!

[@randomweirdo25]

i thought I was the only one who said son of a biscuit!

[@sagorix3228]

My favorite was “son of a motherless goat!” 😆 I have one! “Son of a biscuit eating bulldog” is one I use ALL THE TIME

[@plasmawolf7960]

Nine years later and I find myself unironically saying SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT.

[@rebekahstrasser3280]

I tried two of the Christian cuss words on my girlfriend and her fiancé. She scared me on accident and I said " Great Caesar"s Ghost Ashley!" She cracked up laughing. Later her fiancé scared me and I said " Son Of A Motherless Goat!" That really startled him and he said " Whoa Whoa!"

[@jay-b1223]

Rebekah Strasser 😆😆

[@Cashdawg]

how do you have a girlfriend who has a fiance

[@rebekahstrasser3280]

They got married in December 2016

[@user-beccalk]

okay I have to say, "fart knocker" was my personal favorite!

[@mrssiordia06]

That one was mine!!!!!

[@nina1522]

My family and I are big fans of Downton Abbey, so we say, "My Lord and Lady Grantham". If you watch DA, you'll get it.

[@seraswan3883]

I about died laughing during the crudmuffin bit

[@ashtuatara]

Son of a motherless goat!! I can't breathe!!

[@jekku4688]

Thank you for having great seats....and a steady hand. :-)

[@lorrainecarder3843]

Tim Hawkins when will you come to the uk 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@theskundricks9951]

i hope everyelse enjoys son of a motherless goat as much as me

[@wandacollins2364]

Could not stop laughing!!!

[@JonesNate]

Rakka frakka tootpallutin... Reminds me of Yosemite Sam. Also, "kaka" is just the "s" word in another language.

[@katherinehodson419]

son of a motherless goat! I about tell off the treadmill at that one! 😂

[@ThomaskellySr.]

Just as funny as the video is the guy recording it with his kids listening and laughing along with him 😂

[@Anskygodpokemon]

I use "Son of a flying goatfart!"

[@maddie4582]

Son of a motherless goat!! Where's your mother? I don't knoowwww! Lol

[@bunchmom]

Tim is alsome

[@katieking2525]

Madison Reams read this as he said it😂😂

[@landof6prices]

Freaky Friday iyjgjgfhjghjgcchjgghhhjjkhjjhj

[@gloriajones3952]

I love his expressions XD

[@kacipowers4390]

I liked "bullshik, oh, that was close..." 😂

[@DeconvertedMan]

Be a skeptic, then you can say whatever you want. Yay.

[@EricLimasTPLEra77]

I made up my own "cuss" word: Son of an A-Rod! LOL!

[@primadonna3676]

Um, Where is Holy Shiitake Mushrooms?

[@JonesNate]

Spy Kids?

[@BonziBUDDY]

Shit-take

[@adelissahunsley]

Mine that I say is oh Mylanta. I think I picked it up as a kid watching full house DJ said that on more than one occasion.

[@ruthgreen8214]

another one is "what the cheesecake?"

[@setfreeson]

I personally use "flyin fiddlers feather" and "well diggidy " kinda helps come back to normal because I always think about what I said and it gives me chuckle.

[@PokeWaffles]

"It was over 10000" *no.* *it was OVER 9000*

[@iam1remnant]

Christian cuss words. Son of a motherless goat!

[@amalphia63]

My mom wanted me to get out of the habit of saying “frick” because it was too close to the other cuss word, so I started saying “flip” and she STILL was like “No, it’s too similar to the cuss word” like the flip?

[@ashleydeaton4842]

sugar honey ice tea

[@marksmoot385]

Uep only I use sugar honey Instagram tea

[@chrissyjoy08]

Should have looked before I posted....yes, exactly!! ;)

[@minmin7181]

Isn't that from shreck

[@ashleydeaton4842]

mindie cuozzo Madagascar

[@torqueandturbo8598]

The first letter of each word