Tim's Kitchen Tips -- Episode 3

[@em.1633]

I love that Tim mentions a guy named Deluge98 which based on when this was uploaded implies he was insulting a 15 year old

[@LeonSheeter]

There's no way that might possibly be the year someone graduated..? ... Became married...? Simply the year it was when they created that screen name / handle..? Even if that was an actual user making comments back then & was 15 years old.. Tim's the one who's totally joking & that joke is definitely on deluge98 for possibly believing this to be some regular old cooking show & not a parody of cooking shows.

[@em.1633]

@@LeonSheeter sorry to have to be the one to explain this to you, but the entire thing is fake. There is no deluge98.

[@ChristopherSaindon]

@@LeonSheeter Yeah man you went overboard -- really. You were Deluge98..just spit it out. There is no shame in Tim and Eric.

[@PrestonDowMusic]

"we remember ketchup from the russian dressing"

[@blinkth3dog]

Preston Dow lol

[@hankolio234]

Preston Dow a big 'ol medium sized bowl of ketchup

[@Seantendo]

@@hankolio234 That gave me a good hearty laugh.

[@blanc.gkiller618]

Dont get it

[@NN-sp9tu]

@@blanc.gkiller618 What?

[@Shunderz]

It's that perfect balance between ketchup and mustard water that makes it great.

[@tomesoares9055]

k

[@B3wareTheIdes]

Yeah you probably think your so funny eh? Go fuck yourself you piece of shit.

[@sicboi80]

@Jagar Tharn I was gonna upvote, but I didn't wanna ruin our father's sign.

[@enblanchard5492]

Gross

[@HuckleberryAlexander]

it's the whisking too. the bubbles. of Tim's four recipes, this was the most scrumptious. adding the Pitzman's water really brought out the water in the shrimp I got at the Fishmongers yesterday.

[@Elmo9001]

7:35 "Spit it out, I don't want you getting sick on the flight." That's what makes this series so great; Tim really cares about the safety and wellbeing of his guests. It's a shame Eric was so unappreciative.

[@blackhat1018]

I know, right? Eric really needs to do a better job considering Tim’s feelings.

[@aakkoin]

Eric is allergic to shrimp, and Tim served him some rotten shrimp

[@Elmo9001]

@@aakkoin We only even have Eric's word for it that it was rotten, and with how ungrateful he's been to Tim, I'm not sure I even trust that guy.

[@Juel92]

I love the fact that he consistently makes every sauce way more runny than the ingredients should logically allow.

[@THEDONKAGE]

It's because he makes sure to overmix it as much as he possibly can hahaha

[@Thegbear]

“We’re a bit on the thick side I’ll get some more mustard water in here.”

[@mariapereira3221]

Awesome post! You should explain more jokes

[@frecklenuckle4450]

@@mariapereira3221 very unnecessary salt. everything alright at home, bud?

[@beau9334]

@@mariapereira3221lil bro upset at 3 year old comments

[@theplace2b656]

my wife and i were screaming at the computer that he had too much fluid but smart thinking having the extra bottle of ketchup on hand to thicken her up a little

[@ImageLimestone]

you have no wife

[@djtw34k85]

Mustard water. Key ingredient.

[@0mnicide]

A lot of people don’t know that you can make cocktail sauce out of horses, radishes, water and ketchup. The horses provide horse sauce and you just need a radish farm for the radishes. It’s a lot simpler than Tim makes it out to be. Keep some ketchup packets if you feel the horse juice and radishes need some tomato juice..

[@getmeoutofsanfrancisco9917]

@@0mnicide Hmm. Tastes like horse.

[@bman7399]

@@getmeoutofsanfrancisco9917 Underrated comment

[@mychalmccurdy5838]

This guy is great. He really breaks it down in a way that even people who aren't excellent cooks can follow along. However, I really don't understand why he keeps bringing that guy Eric on to taste. He always seems so busy and overall his attitude is the pitz.

[@bari891]

you son of a bitch

[@LisaMitchellGD]

🤣🤣

[@blanc.gkiller618]

Lolol we had enouh

[@TheWalrus013]

I had to dislike your comment, just know that one dislike is a like.

[@BOOMMERZ024420]

Eric's pep pep told him to do it

[@gyromurphy]

My roommate came out from his room just now and said "I knew what you were watching from the mixing plop sounds"

[@spaomalley]

You should mix it up with a little poo porn now and again.

[@panedorhyfedd]

I'll never get enough of Tim sliding liquid food off of a countertop and into a bowl.

[@dogmachine2406]

My favourite bit is how on last episode he opened with how nobody cares about all the negative feedback and how the haters are not being acknowledged . But he opens this episode with a direct response to a hater.

[@SlakjeJasper]

This show actually got me back into mustard

[@stuartmitchell1908]

I'd recently kicked mustard. And this show ruined my life (again) everyone's different.

[@SlakjeJasper]

@@stuartmitchell1908 What did the mustard do to you? D:

[@stuartmitchell1908]

@@SlakjeJasper 😂😂

[@LisaMitchellGD]

Pitzman's or just mustard in general ?

[@timothylong3722]

This episode turned me on to the power of mustard water.

[@alexanderwernette9998]

Anyone notice the cutscene where he's just mixing Pissman's into a bowl of nothing but lettuce lol

[@okjetsam]

Big ol medium size bowl

[@kellerw4800]

Severely underrated

[@AyeThaKiddGotSwagg]

Chickens Baqs Baqs yup

[@jodiejodie87]

made me lol, he did something similar with the relish in first video

[@GaryGoals]

@@kellerw4800 how are the critically acclaimed Tim and Eric in any way underrated?

[@MelancoliaI]

Eric's lowkey aggression at having to participate in this really gives my viewing experience a real zing, much like Pitzman's does to my sauces.

[@briana.8813]

I love how in the transitions he’s just pouring Pitzman’s straight on the lettuce..

[@Blitzkrieg1012]

its prettty cool that hes a comedian and a chef

[@StamfordBridge]

AND a comedian.

[@Zomana9]

@ianjsutt And a comedian

[@jqyhlmnp]

Blitzkrieg1012 he’s also antman

[@isaacberger6721]

@@jqyhlmnp it doesn't count because he paid for the role

[@jqyhlmnp]

James Brown I’ll pay you

[@benburch]

my favorite movie of all time "cocktail sauce" starring tom cruise

[@aakkoin]

when you have movies like tom cruise in them, you can't lose

[@kortexsirvasil]

a real five-bagger for sure

[@jamesralls841]

Confirmed: Tim’s Kitchen Tips is part of the On Cinema Universe

[@slimyclips]

@@aakkoin I give this recipe 5 bags of popcorn 🍿🍿🍿🍿🍿 and 1 little rotten shrimp 🍤

[@wolfmanjacksaid]

TC!

[@aleciakorkowski8714]

We mixed everything out. Not a big deal.

[@BrianBattles]

Alecia Korkowski Why even bother with a bowl?

[@domanskikid]

You are SERIOULSY trying to figure out a way to bring politics into this, dipshit?

[@GalvakzaMusic]

Really? Because typically jokes are funny

[@fruithoops4532]

XDDDDDDDD TRUMP IS STUPID AMMIRIGHT GAUISE?!

[@1dyingwish]

dooder Pretty shitty joke, trying for that low hanging fruit and failing, Amazing... nice crossed out swastika picture by the way... No understanding of its origins or how it was used in other cultures in non aggressive ways, Just riding that virtue signaling wave as far as it can go huh? Stupidity at its finest.

[@KatiePotatie1986]

I loved the first two episodes. I'm only 1:20 in, and I'm dying to know what the secret ingredient will be!

[@vincent21212]

spoiler: the secret ingredient is tap water

[@mawbts530]

Tim's mastered all the cheesy cooking show lines. "We're doing a real rough mix, almost folding it over...now let's get our stir going."

[@potatolemon9442]

Made this for a poker night, friends loved it. Thanks Tim!

[@sirnippip]

+Potato Lemon I would like to make it, I'm just worried about the mess.

[@Dragonspeaksopinions]

+SuspAnimation ?

[@brontobeat]

+Potato Lemon fuck you

[@willferrel6896]

Potato Lemon and white wine

[@ihavefallenandicantreachmy2113]

Poker Friends? I bet they are your Shrim friends, now, after eating that frothy mess.

[@StrayLion]

They need to bring this shit back.

[@GeorgioTheChef]

pray for the pitzmans

[@easterdm]

go fuck yourself

[@0mnicide]

Tim and Eric never bring anything back. Tom goes to the mayor, cooking tips, Dr. Wareheim, Nite Live, Awesome Show, GoPro show. They do one thing and they’re done with it.

[@captinundies6049]

If they brought it back it wouldn't be as funny. It's kind of like breaking bad if they made it longer then 5 seasons it would have ended badly.

[@StrayLion]

@@0mnicide They brought back Oscar Specials year after year and we're slated to get another.

[@jmorgan87]

This person has no right to be this good at cooking.

[@FluxFreeman]

no u

[@pofwiwice]

Josh Morgan?

[@jmorgan87]

@@pofwiwice yes

[@MortonGoldthwait]

3:01 I love it when that chunk of tomato flies into frame.

[@CrodolookslikeFrody]

I love how Tim stays so calm and so natural. He's actually a really great actor.

[@timanderic]

[@golsenator]

WOW

[@TheFreshBoys314]

tim admit to stealing our ideas

[@FunkyHermione]

TheFreshBoys314 . yeah real clever deluge98 how many accounts are you going to make just to dislike / post negative comments

[@orensish]

hahaha you guys are so funny

[@Scotchegz]

Severus Snape NIce face asshat.

[@ITSFRICKENADAM]

i love how every episode, eric is always inconvenienced and he always desribes the taste with only 2 ingredients. "tastes like mustard and water"

[@FRISKY_MANDINGO]

The question is if mustard and water is different than "mustard water".

[@0mnicide]

It’s not just mustard it’s Piss Mustard.

[@WubbyPunch]

And one of those is always mustard

[@chileo1]

Tim: "My secret ingrediant, a little Pissmans mustard, nobody will even know its there" Eric: " Tastes like ketchup with a LOT of mustard"

[@blackhat1018]

It’s amazing how Tim poured a whole bottle of ketchup into it and Eric still tastes only the mustard.

[@3rdeyealive]

I tried this recipe and personally I think the aged shrimp gives the palette an extra zing it was very exotic

[@spaceenablers4753]

It's better on an airplane. Pre funeral.

[@xXxJSCOTTxXx]

I love slow cured shrimp... just hang expired raw shrimp on a line until flies start to gather. You'll know when they're done when the number of flies on the shrimp reaches peak concentration(approx. 8-15 flies per shrimp). Remove from line, place in poorly-sealed containers and store in cool-but-not-cold spot until ready to consume... Same can be done with raw, expired chicken. Just modify peak fly concentration to 10-15 flies per ounce of raw chicken... If you end up trying this recipe, let me know how it turned out! Also I would be curious to know how long you were hospitalized and what the medical bills totaled...

[@0mnicide]

I tried it with some shrimp but I’m allergic to shellfish. Felt very betrayed by Tim. He should’ve said if your allergic to shrimp don’t eat shrimp.

[@jansenart0]

Did you live?

[@kevingluys3063]

@@jansenart0 no :_(

[@nnadozie6190]

This is why I can't cook. I've been keeping everything I mix IN the bowl and not letting it pour out naturally.

[@Evan-co4tm]

"I don't mind working in a dirty kitchen, I like the chaos" Stirs out all the sauce onto the counter "Ah that's fine, we'll just put it back in the bowl. I keep a very clean kitchen"

[@theone-mz5ut]

Just create a lane.

[@tylerwaters6632]

Cocktail sauce: What you'll need: Ketchup Horseradish Chives Minsed Tomatoes Pitzmans Mustard Add everything into the bowl. Gently mix contents by using the folding method. Next, stir until everything is out of the bowl. Once everything is out, scoop contents back in via your hand. Then add the rest of your Pitzmans (fill with water if needed). Next: wisk out all the unnecessary fluids. Then test with your hand for runniness. Add more ketchup. Test again with hand. Add more mustard water if too thick. If that causes it to be too runny, add full bottle of ketchup. Congratulations, you just made some great cocktail sauce. Show it off to your best friend, your pep pep, and even your step-peppers.

[@hankolio234]

Tyler Waters ketchup? Where do I know that from?

[@christopherwayne5114]

Wow, my step-peppers would’ve loved this sauce before he had an aneurysm and lost his sense of taste.

[@hansrockhard]

@@christopherwayne5114 You should have got him the Cinco Food Tube system.

[@strimbimmin328]

@@hansrockhard numb them gumbs!

[@918kickinwing]

Pairs well with old shrimp....well....maybe.

[@voxlvalyx]

Horsh radice sauce is my favorite.

[@Ragarnoy0]

horss rash sauuce

[@diltonx6066]

smells like horse.

[@Achw3l]

@@diltonx6066 Sounds expensive

[@909Films]

I love how Eric says he’s allergic to shrimp after eating a piece of shrimp.

[@martink3442]

"whisk some of that fluid out", i will use that in my cooking, thanks Tim

[@104ist]

4:58 the way he now says Mustard Water, as if that’s a universally established kitchen ingredient

[@westernhemlock]

I love how Tim always plays this role so straight in the beginning, then derails it as soon as he starts stirring

[@thugger-vandross]

7:26 *THATS SOME OLD SHRIMP* _Followed by classic Tim _*_oops face_*

[@djtw34k85]

05:20 was dying at Tim trying to get the right "thickness" by dumping in a full bottle of generic ketchup

[@jneville880]

A chef who measures "by the eye" is a true master of his craft

[@joshuabrunetta4656]

Tim measuring the viscosity of the dressing with his clenched fist will forever be one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen

[@Jay122333]

"That's some old shrimp. Be careful how much you eat." XD

[@pofict]

To anyone who may be reading this: I tried Tim's cocktail sauce at a party tonight. Unfortunately, the sauce was so good that all the guests, including me, ate about 200-250 shrimp each. Our shrimp levels are way too high, we need 8-10 bottles of white wine ASAP. Please help.

[@Derrickstare]

oh my god are you okay?

[@MrBigShot110]

nope, Darren!! Bring in the shrimp!

[@The_OneManCrowd]

Gotta get those white wine levels back up!

[@Starrynights1924]

Did you try the Beaver Bounce?

[@kswiss89]

I’ve been meaning to get my shrim tested

[@elevensquids]

Ugh, god damn, do they have a mic in the bowl or something? Tim and Eric are geniuses at audio that makes me want to throw up.

[@TubinHard00]

The mics are in the seats, you just have to bend down and say thank you - Tim and Eric's Mandatory Attendance Tour

[@kyleanderson2949]

They own those sound effects. Tim eating the Kobe sliders in On the Cinema is one of the most horrifying sounds imaginable

[@dayvidwithay]

🤣🤣🤣

[@intraum]

the delivery on "it's actually just cocktail" is so good

[@7elEvan1]

2:46 "I don't like to keep a clean kitchen" 3:12 "no problem, that's why I keep a clean counter top"

[@floofytown]

Oh man, when he starts just blatantly scooping the stuff out of the bowl.. I just lost it. It's a simple little gag, but after watching the last two where the gag was still obvious but not blatant, this is just perfectly ridiculous.

[@floofytown]

Me too man!!

[@turbocharged9589]

"Well, we..umm..mixed everything out!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@bondfool]

“Oops.”

[@dabulls1g]

I LOVE how disgusting this sauce sounds, it makes my stomach turn. "it's just a whole bottle of uh ketchup :-|" his facial expression here is KEY

[@williamwhite2971]

:^[]

[@gsesquire3441]

When youve got sauces with Pitzmans in it, you cant lose!

[@StoutShako]

Watching Tim slide some of that counter-sauce back into the bowl gave me a shiver down my spine that no horror movie can recreate.

[@StoutShako]

I just got to the fisting part and I'm going to have a heart attack

[@oneghost1257]

"I'm allergic to shrimp." He says after eating the shrimp without protesting lol

[@DistantEarlyWarning]

"Uhhh what's the name of that Tom Cruise movie uhhh Cocktail Sauce, it's actually just Cocktail" I lost it there

[@Morale_Booster]

Love when Tim gets his stir going

[@warmachine021]

Tim gettin his stir on.

[@whitestripesftw]

"Maybe just a touch on the thick side here, so lemme get a lil' more mustard water in here..." It's so matter of fact that I'm inclined to believe him. Putting mustard water in most sauces now with great texture results.

[@zaneberry2416]

How do they mic the liquids so well, honestly hearing the slop of the mixing segment makes it really good.

[@charliekopp443]

He says it’s simple but it’s actually extremely complicated. My store doesn’t even carry Pitzman’s mustard. Too bad, because that sauce looks amazing.

[@preciousbelcher3676]

This video never gets old

[@NIKCANFLY]

Their shrimp levels are dangerously high! we need 50CC of white wine to balance it out

[@kension333]

B b beaver boys!

[@kidennixon4924]

​@@kension333 and white wine!

[@lh7264]

THE NOISE THE SHRIMP MAKES WHEN HE SPITS IT OUT KILLS ME

[@StillOnFire]

A 5 bagger of a dipping sauce, had friends round mine for Oscar on Sunday, really made the night complete.

[@thekingofnorway3465]

*WE ACTUALLY MIXED EVERYTHING OUT*

[@hotelmario510]

What's the name of that Tom Cruise movie? Cocktail Sauce.

[@sammosammy]

0:52 - Bit of On Cinema spilling into Tim's cooking show there

[@momparty]

I've watched these through like 14 or 15 times over the years, and there's just something about em that still makes me laugh.

[@420jimihendrix69]

my dude really made a cooking show of him mixing sauces together and putting mustard in everything..

[@theeunuchman5819]

Yeah, he did.

[@DagobahDave]

This is the episode where the giggles hit hard.

[@Mr123robert999]

awesome sauce, i didn't have catsup so i just substituted it with ammonia. bone apple teet.

[@skydiamsteam6005]

Alannah B.D. *Bone apple tit

[@roberthrodebert9263]

Tim's culinary skills are what won Aiaka over.

[@hotwateronwool]

It's been a lonnnng time since I've laughed so hard my stomach hurt. Amazing

[@yatz57]

I just love watching a real professional at work! Tim might not be some fancy "chef" - he IS a regular (and very talented) guy, who just knows what he likes and doesn't let the haters deter him from sharing it with the world! Many thanks to him - and, of course, to his good pal, Eric, who doesn't let anything get in the way of helping out his buddy!

[@SkeleTre]

Bravo! Those two ketchup bottles were screaming and wheezing like they were being held hostage. Great job all around, brothers.

[@lisafreeman4235]

Tim, your blending technique is revolutionary!

[@thugger-vandross]

When he dumped in the mustard water I was fucking DEAD. And then after spitting out the paper seal he squeezed in the full bottle of ketchup 😂😂😭 These fuckers are so funny

[@spiderprint]

I'm going to name my first born Mustard Water.

[@shaolinwisdom]

I made this for a party. it was a big hit!!

[@omcorc]

The best part of these videos is that you know Eric is going to have something pretty big going on in his life that Tim just doesn't give a rat's ass about, and then Eric is going to get super pissed off about it and storm off during the credits.

[@nicolehughes5344]

I used this recipe for my woman’s book group. It was so good I ate 200-250 shrimp. The Pissman’s added the extra zing necessary to allow me to put away another 50 shrimp after everyone left. 10/10.

[@seanwjf2120]

That's some old shrimp.

[@butchvito]

Not only is he a comedic genius, but seriously how does keep a straight face? Even on the On Cinema Oscar specials he keeps it cool and those are filmed live.

[@tylert2413]

A nice white wine would have paired nicely with that shrimp.

[@antoniot918]

First watched this about 5 years ago. Now I’m in the army stuck on base cuz of corona. This cheered me up. Thanks Tim.

[@justonesandzeros42]

Came from the mustard, stayed for the man

[@11raljr11]

ya blew it

[@Cholst053]

one of the best episodes ever

[@wrenmacneil7703]

the way he somehow decided that grabbing the sauce with his own hands was the best way to test it's constancy is simply genius

[@eyeintheskytabs]

So good to be able to come back to these videos whenever I need last minute ideas for potlucks

[@greghark6863]

Still cooking with Pissman’s for years now. Makes everything taste tangy and delicious

[@aaronsalinas518]

7 Thanksgivings later, my family is STILL RAVING about this cocktail sauce recipe I made. Thank you, Tim. Pro-tip: Add more Pitzman's if it's a younger crowd ; )

[@kathleenmms]

why do I laugh so hard when he mixes shit? bahahah

[@11raljr11]

ya blew it

[@bigpoppa4692]

kathleenmms you've got to!

[@DMacLean15]

kathleenmms “I like some of the chaos.” lmao

[@CountChrisdo]

That's the best part

[@joetierney2]

We remember ketchup lol

[@Zeina107]

I forgot :(

[@hankolio234]

Joe T from the Russian dressing

[@kevinnashiscool1]

When he mixed it all out I thought, he going to have to start all over, but then he used the lane technique!

[@jakethemistakeRulez]

I love this show and this sauce. I made it for my 1 year old nephew and he loved it so much he cried tears of joy! Thanks Tim!

[@MrKajithecat]

What the hell, I tried this recipe and my cat pissed on my bed. Thanks Tim!

[@zee339]

+MrKajithecat boom! irony..... that's how they get the pitzman's mustard

[@Dragonspeaksopinions]

+MrKajithecat This one needs something?

[@yourmothercalledshesaid]

+MrKajithecat If there was an award presented for the best youtube picture/avatar, yours would be nominated several times, over and over. Then, several years later, when the guilt was too much and everybody else has took home the award, yours would ultimately be recognized as truly brilliant...winning...the next year.

[@zimrihinshaw3572]

+MrKajithecat You're a god

[@EXTREEEEEEEEEME]

Oh it was cat I was wrong! Ill guess grampa again for episode 4

[@scj6693]

7:25 i love the way eric just stares at tim when he says that

[@Olliebond1]

mi mo mo tim heidecker

[@keirsinclair290]

I love how he says "mustard water" like it's an actual thing.

[@PavyMac]

I wow at every dinner party with this recipe.

[@RATDATSUN]

4:26 👌 *"If I do this you'll see the run"*

[@JoeJohnston-taskboy]

I am really picking up some good stirring techniques from these eps! Keep it coming! Can't wait for the Pittzman's Olde Thymey Popsicles show for summer treats.

[@James-if3kc]

This is the hardest I've ever laughed at Tim and Eric!

[@Nothing-fp7jg]

I have to say, this video is amazing - it seems just like a youtube video but subtle comedy.

[@Kaydin66]

it's ironic that the opening joke of this is about commenters insulting him and then a decade later he's consumed by the 'deluge' of internet comments mocking him.