#192

[@TimDillonShow]

For archives and weekly bonus episodes: www.patreon.com/thetimdillonshow Merch! Hoodies, mugs! www.bonfire.com/store/the-tim-dillon-show/

[@czourides]

#PLANdemic

[@hustler3of4culture3]

This is what all the chuds thought Obama would do

[@rms2829]

do you think trump should donate his hotels to be hospitals?

[@CSDonohue11]

When shit starts to really hit the fan they’re going to have to put In Martial Law so I hope people are smart enough to not let that happen but we know better than that. Too many people are too selfish and there’s far too many turds that will start bugging out before it’s even that bad but they’ll make it worse and thus here comes the tanks and now we’re really F’d. I hope they just round up the F tards that bought all the toilet papers. 😷

[@johnmastroligulano7401]

Yes that is what they do while monitoring all of us with algorithms/AI which tells them what they have to do in order to get away with this or that. Remember they've been doing this for far longer than most people even realized.

[@ChristmasCrybaby]

Straight from his shift at Target to doing a podcast!! I respect the grind, Timmy!!

[@aroguereptilian]

😂😂😂👍

[@AnonymousFREEZEpOp1]

Who knew he worked at bestbuy, Walmart, AND Target?

[@epic1761]

Lol

[@johnpierro3022]

Don’t include “straight” in a sentence involving T.dillon

[@tommyoneill9761]

I respect the hustle.

[@hecdizzle70]

Marshall Law sounds like Tims next grinder hookup

[@kaizen5415]

I always thought it was 'martial law'

[@Dannutts]

@@kaizen5415 yeah, it is. Everyone is dumb as shit

[@asiansweetboy]

That's a Tekken character

[@dankestranch8738]

LMFAO yo is tim really gay or is this a joke

[@asiansweetboy]

@@dankestranch8738 he's actually gay

[@ricksflicks-]

Going through all the 2020 and 2021 episodes. I didn't even know who Tim was at the time. Wish I could have caught this at the time. Perfect pandemic podcast.

[@S87yt]

Tim encourages connections with family and friends to get through this, but I cancelled them all based on his previous advice

[@declanh2314]

If you got your jewels buy tim dillon you'll be fine

[@poyaispanic5269]

You’re good, you are already under the curve

[@KSChris-vi5mg]

Being unattractive and having no friends is finally paying off. 😷

[@Brennan009]

Love type o

[@cloudbloom]

@@Brennan009 stay negative θ

[@kittyvalentine69]

Taught my 6 year old to say " life in the big city" he's using it well and in context when I inform him of another unfortunate side effect of all this😅 Granny is sick, he says with a smile " life in the big city". 🤗 RIP Grandma

[@couchman-sw6jy]

kitty Valentine Thank you for raising him with such a perspective 😂 he will be funny

[@kittyvalentine69]

@@couchman-sw6jy we're going to start a podcast. 😎

[@CH-ml4rz]

I can see it already. ‘Kitty & the Kid!’ Guests on this evenings Tonight Show!

[@seanodaimhin7005]

@@kittyvalentine69 well podcasting is the only job that will be left in a month.

[@maxr1826]

he will really fit in with the other kids

[@disconnected22]

The fact that these essential Corona-era vids don’t have more views shows that many of the last year subscriptions aren’t doing the deep dive. That’s a shame.

[@anthonysorkin789]

Love watching podcasts from 2 years ago just to remember how insane the time period was

[@pinderbupinder1598]

Tell me about it Bro

[@des7638]

Countless brilliant moments and points. This episode is aging well. Thanks Tim

[@peppino1961]

Tim Dillon is the funniest guy out there, absolutely love this guy.

[@MrBillkaz]

He is the only thing keeping me from offing myself

[@josephfazio2300]

@Robert Phillips j n n jjp NBC bought Gtf Sy

[@johnrambler8034]

This episode will never get old. And it will get funnier and funnier every other year. Mark my words.

[@aptkeyboard3173]

A lot of his predictions were spot on

[@coverage022]

we're now in the last 6 months of his 18-month prediction and i gotta say: he's scary accurate

[@masterprattu]

He predicted Trump would go out with a bang and he was spot on. Tim is a smart guy.

[@scottdavidson3108]

The only guy telling the truth is a podcasting jewellery salesman...what a world.

[@EverythingMustG0]

Low cost, high quality truth

[@maxfoth5054]

Boom. Crushed this comment

[@HungGarEarthBender]

Life in the big city

[@GrandDP44]

Every single fucking minute of every single podcast is quality content. Truly. No other comedian can produce content like thos regularly

[@super8man807]

Truly

[@cg5701]

A tank next to the park...... ........life in the big city

[@warpabbey]

Tim Dillon is one of the best stand up comedians as of now. His podcasts are great and he's able to keep up a hilarious monologue for over one hour just talking off the top of his head. He has a quick mind.

[@TheUsurperJoffreyBaratheon]

“If you’re still thinking in terms of left and right, you’re wrong” PAPA DILLON HAS SPOKEN.

[@johngalt84nyc]

J ronnn you started out so well then let your racism show.

[@rage-quit69]

Have a seat. Lol

[@DeSoulTV]

How long until Chrissy Teigen is live streaming how to load a Soviet-era anti tank rifle?

[@DillonPadgette]

For once she might just have a shred of relevance!

[@Donnerinho]

would be an improvement over her "vagasshole" comment

[@michaeljoseph2827]

Remember a couple months ago, when it didn't make sense Tim was promoting backpacks for the Apocalypse 🤣🤣🤣

[@lookbeforeitstoolate]

tim dillon had advanced knowledge! heard he had 2.3 trillion in student debt... NOW his interest is paused!

[@johngalt84nyc]

oh it made sense

[@enavorkind2101]

Legit one of the best podcasts I've ever heard

[@TokyoSwan.]

Ellen dancing with the miltary lmfao

[@michaeljohnson8329]

What could be the next currency in the new world? Well, for the elite, there's always child's blood. For the rest of us? Jewels by podcaster Tim Dillon

[@seanodaimhin7005]

But I still haven't gotten mine. I've convinced most of my friends and family to order their jewels from me, because of the lifestyle, but now they're getting angry.

[@micric217]

Umm, bring back the Italian Lire? 🤔

[@valuablesandwich]

Man your show has trandcended the normal comedy podcast realm at this point. This legitimately needs to be heard for reasons way beyond coping with this event with humor. Please continue to use your platform to help wake people up. Thank you, Tim, for real.

[@doodahman2995]

When I get the faintest hint of anxiety I go right for latest Tim Dillon update. And I'm Alright-!! Keep em coming big guy!! We need you!!!

[@joelpinkerton]

and here he is ladies and gentlemen, Tim dillon, out here looking out for everyone else but himself 😂😂 ur the best Tim

[@stefonpawlowski9666]

I saw a picture of Chrissy Tiegen that had nothing to do with this podcast and my brain yelled “We’re just ordinary Cannibaaaals” damn you Tim

[@devobarro8534]

I’ve listened to this a few times already, quite comforting in these crazy times sir! Thank you

[@brendankirk]

Still waiting on my Jewels by podcaster Tim Dillon... I’ve been telling my friends about the low cost and high quality jewels I can hook them up with.

[@hammer326]

DUDE SAME HERE!

[@JC-bs6jl]

BRo where my damn jewels timmy, .. Lol jk

[@hammer326]

@@JC-bs6jl Probably in the trash can.

[@CH-ml4rz]

U tell them?! SELL them the dream.

[@henryduran4582]

no, they're high cost, low quality jewels

[@freebased1780]

I feel that this episode was the turning point in the Tim Dillon Show, as far as Tim being our senior color commentator for the dumpster fire/shit show that all of our lives have devolved into! This is beautiful

[@jimikeech4420]

This is the moment Timmy became the new voice of his generation. I've been expecting this for a long time and all it took was the crumbling of society

[@kngtrdr_]

Thanks for this super pick-me-up show, Tim. Really appreciate it. LOL

[@Youknowhatitis23483]

“Marinara sauce covered fingers” lol

[@TheNorbeb]

Thank you Tim for giving us laughter in these times of trouble🙏

[@iamshaman]

"They don't necessarily rejoice but it doesn't f*ck up their day at all."

[@SirGrassyNoL]

awesome might be the first patreon i ever sign up for

[@bigfoot7688]

I love when Tim is so doom and gloom

[@Snacks0614]

“Fauchi who’s probably a good dude” one quote that didn’t age well.

[@manialchoroomi9657]

I’ve quarantined myself in a Wendy’s now I don’t have to worry running out of food an shelter.

[@patmald]

they don't freeze their beef. it'll get spoiled......

[@skepsisrollins1711]

@@patmald damn...

[@mchepen]

running out of food in a wendy's? there was never FOOD there in the first place

[@CH-ml4rz]

🧠👈🏻

[@pirkkala]

Sir this is an arbys

[@yogi6917]

Tim Dillon is where I go when Rogan is being horrendously unfunny or has the same played out comedian on his show for the 5th unfunny time.

[@TheEljefe20]

You got it backwards. Rogan is where I go when I run out of Dillon.

[@terdferguson1736]

@@TheEljefe20 you are correct sir

[@terdferguson1736]

Ya joey “coco” diaz for one .. guy is so overrated by them.. sure he is probably fun to have around at a party when he tells a story but he is not a comedian at all.. there is absolutely no craft to his shit and I personally enjoy seeing a guy work and polish up his material.. he just goes, oye motherfuckers, swears more and tells an embellished story that ive probably already heard and then calls people motherfuckers some more..

[@darellteague3845]

@@terdferguson1736 great observation, Mr Terd Ferguson 🧐

[@darellteague3845]

And Tim Dillon is where I have stayed after the same revelation.

[@hheythered]

Damn Tim called it

[@CinnamonWilson]

It's a pleasure watching civilization crumble with you Tim. Take care of yourself so you can post videos when shit really goes sideways.

[@williammerriman439]

Big REDDDD. Warm tones keeping me awake

[@timotharcher]

Tim Laykis Dillon is on fire, god damn!

[@whitnbits2253]

39:35 "are we gonna be living under marshall law and still watching jimmy fallon? shut it down!..." tim you are fucking brilliant lol shit had me dying

[@EndoQuickness]

“A fire broke out backstage in a theatre. The clown came out to warn the public; they thought it was a joke and applauded. He repeated it; the acclaim was even greater. I think that's just how the world will come to an end: to general applause from wits who believe it's a joke.” ― Soren Kierkegaard

[@1MinuteFlipDoc]

"Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says, 'But doctor…I am Pagliacci.' Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains."

[@rickyp7984]

When that Marinara sauce covered fingers rant was going on 🤣🤣🤣

[@Demion83]

The way he laughs at the rat when it gets squashed in traffic 😂 😂

[@Kell1984]

Tim's on the nicotine gum outta fear! God bless him.

[@dylon8425]

🙏 god bless

[@lebulle4544]

I'm on the nicotine gum and I don't smoke.

[@Kell1984]

@@lebulle4544 Are you doing a Masonic hand sign while you chew?

[@Bxtskul1l]

Good on him for dropping it into his hand instead of touching his mouth.

[@stay.alive.00]

poor bastard

[@goodie2shoes]

The way he speaks. Like music.

[@adamleachman8553]

All sarcasm aside, I’m so glad we have a reliable source for news and honest observations finally. The humor is a bonus. Tim Dillon is full of unappreciated wisdom. The best jewel by podcaster Tim Dillon is Tim himself.

[@cheezedadada]

Tim's radio DJ impression at 34:00 made me feel like he could be USA's "Three Dog" when the world plunges into Fallout status.

[@robcow897]

I wish I lived in a place where the panic actually made sense. In a city with less than 100 cases overall, all the freaking out just isn't the mood.

[@lancejames7072]

Rob Cow seeing as you live in a town with 100 people I’d say you have the most appropriate profile picture of ALL TIME with that goat! Hahaha

[@kidsonblackops]

0:34:34 for corona virus the musical.

[@jaywon06]

2:50 just a little funny watching the producer rub his nose and touch his face every time Tim says virus lol

[@jaywon06]

9:05

[@jaywon06]

9:25

[@jaywon06]

10:32

[@jaywon06]

12:30 the producer reminds me of Joker.

[@jaywon06]

12:30 the producer reminds me of Joker.

[@BRASSKNUCKLE22]

I can totally picture tim shooting at looters in a really gay bath robe but then it turns out the looters were actually raccoons and ray kumpf rifling through the trash.

[@x-hunter1965]

This episode really just smacked me in the face how this all will add up. I mean It's a complex issue that takes a lot of thought and same with predicting it, however this episode really lays it all out more cleary. Definitely raised my level of preparation for this and anything happening including something truly terrible

[@flakkaflakka7414]

OUTSTANDING TIM 🔥 MORE OF THIS PLEASE

[@ronaldyodersr]

Tim Dillon For President

[@Tim_Black]

This Tim approves this Tim as required consumption during the Pandemic. Put the pictures on the wall folks. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Keep watching, Johnson.

[@MP-MTB]

Nice to see TBTV here too!!

[@juliemariemcintyre]

TBTV 👀 !!

[@phak7226]

Beautiful simply priceless Dillion finally a comedian that tells it like it is about this farce of a political system and its actors

[@jackshepard9785]

This one was dark. Love it.

[@charlesplott7758]

Tim Dillon, the modern Nostradamus!

[@momog5615]

It is time for the coronavirus musical, Tim. From 2024

[@brencelt]

Astonishing level of off the cuff humour. Well done.

[@brendannucifora3083]

Tim better copyright his lines for Coronavirus The Musical before Hollywood takes that from the people too

[@regmcg4171]

...out at the Wilmuth farm, Grover’s Mill, New Jersey...eleven miles from Princeton...

[@donnahowarth1545]

Great Show!! Great Advice!! You're the Best of the Best!!! Thank you for the Honesty!

[@b.newsome8696]

Tim, You are making my quarantine with my family bearable. Thanks for staying on man.

[@WTFIsThisGuyDoing233]

This podcast is exactly how everyone felt when all of this started.

[@loggystone]

Tim Dillion is a dying breed of Americans. This man needs to be heard.

[@funkmasterkirk]

Tim Dillon's merch was the only thing that got me through these tough times.

[@saucemaster5765]

Man I want you Ben, Chappelle, Rawlins, Rogan and Alex Jones all in one room for. 3 hours. I’d watch that shit 3 times in a 24 hour period

[@revmaxproductions]

Panic in the big city

[@lamolambda8349]

Hey aslong as it's not at the disco

[@Helloomadison]

Crying in the big city 🌃

[@imemberberry]

The contrast in outlook between this and history hyenas patreon made for a fun day

[@ericmilton2324]

I motion for tim to do a character named marshall law who is a very conservative investment banker with a diverse portfolio of toilet paper companies defending corona virus

[@missesfloundergoopslime3174]

I needed this. Thank you!

[@Dom-mw8gk]

With all this going on here in Croatia we got hit with a 5,3 earthquake half an hour ago. Truly the end of times...

[@Dom-mw8gk]

@Vince Williams shits insane and now snow is falling on 2nd day of spring and yesterday we had 20 celsius, life in the big city...

[@michaeljoseph2827]

I see TV producers writhing with excitement at the hopes of tapping into podcasts success, having their talent broadcast from home.

[@cartrlng]

last time i saw widespread panic i took five hits of acid and ate a corndog i found on the ground

[@mattmurray517]

That’s the first thing I thought of too when he mentioned widespread panic hahaha

[@lizbrauer3374]

only Tim could make a pandemic fun - FUCKING AMAZING

[@BossHawgJT]

Tim Dillon, you truly are a ray of light in these uncertain times. I honestly fucking love you. Thanks for the funny.

[@doughnutfingers]

Dude, this man 100% predicted the future... yes or yes?

[@eisenwerks6388]

We finally need that guy who's social media is just a picture of him in the woods with a gun and a dog, frowning, with the caption, "I'm ready" That's Local Man, Florida Man's absentee father

[@deadairnetworkofficial]

You are the best. Thank you!

[@gabes3dvideos]

Thanks for the structure Timbb.

[@lamolambda8349]

Tim droping that lozenge like a fancy lad

[@LetsGoGetThem]

Under President Hilldog America would've already been in Marshall Law. Life in the big city.

[@timmylane4726]

Thank you for this Tim. Great podcast.

[@jiiig8667]

"Get the F off Instagram live!" - THANKU 🤣🤣

[@Garblegox]

That black curtain in the darkness just screams "I ORDERED A NEON SIGN WITH MY NAME ON IT AND IT'S STILL ON ITS WAY"

[@headfullofacid8088]

Jeremy Kean 😂🤣

[@WitzyZed]

One of these days it's going to drop and behind it is a huge banner reading #VOTEPIG

[@youngkingdom8131]

Can you please do one of these daily? The world needs it.

[@torvaldask7193]

This podcast is amazing

[@bethannesperring872]

I love you Tim

[@61butthatsaveragehere87]

56:00 this is so incredibly sweet

[@josephscarpinski5557]

I love how all the planes are grounded and the sky is so blue

[@keepgrindingup7661]

The setup for Coronavirus The Musical is gold... @34:47

[@zeitGGeist]

God this has been a couple of years

[@pt2hays]

Dillon bringing content thick and fast..

[@chrisjacobs6236]

Thank yall for real I needed a laugh my mom has chemo therapy while ducking covid like neo from the matrix fun fun

[@LaTigerGenesis]

Yo gang, if any viewers have questions about food stamps, medicaid, etc. I'd be happy to either share what I know or get an answer. We're still working at the welfare offices here in PA (presumably in many other states). It can be a pain in the dick getting reliable info on policy updates for that shit as Tom Hanks Disease keeps revving up. I'm looking forward to being able to quit and sell jewels for Podcaster Tim Dillon full-time. I mean, sell opportunities to my friends and family.

[@matthewsnyder674]

If they ever make another National Treasure, those intrepid explorers will end up at the Tim Dillon Show. Cuz that's what this is, baby.