To Impress Martha Stewart On A Date, You Better Be Jetting Off To A Private Island

Our dear friend Martha Stewart returns to the show with a bottle of Martha's Chard and some fun ideas for a romantic Valentine's Day. Watch as she reveals what it takes to impress her on a first date, and check out more of her delicious ideas at www.martha.com. #Colbert #ValentinesDay #MarthaStewart
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via Paramount+, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

[@kenek629]

I always love the chaos that ensues when these two get together 😂

[@heyheytaytay]

this is chaos to you? LMAO

[@llcooljay520]

They are such opposites lol

[@comment2344]

@@heyheytaytay it is

[@avisrobinson452]

🤣🤣

[@Leeohlin89]

@@heyheytaytayduh.

[@courtesy2336]

She's fantastic! She used to be so stuffy--talented and brilliant but stuffy. In these recent years she has a wonderful "give zero f**ks" attitude! Always a great guest!

[@wildflower1397]

Snoop and his stash might have a little to do with that, lol

[@ToowokeforFlorida]

@@wildflower1397 No, it was months in prison that set her free from that old stiff version.

[@Baliane22]

@@wildflower1397 Lol I was gonna type that! But I decided to check the responses first. You are so spot on!!!!! Martha has been permanently high since she met Snoop.

[@auntieangie6546]

Prison changes you...

[@annamorgan9069]

@@ToowokeforFlorida Agree, life is short. Prison or illness, either can set you free to be real so you can cut to the chase.. (Hopefully only a "white collar crime".)

[@rodddossantos1437]

Now that was, very, entertaining. Stephen & Martha should do it more often. -The baking segment I mean!! 😆

[@ChineduOpara]

Suuuure 😂😂

[@maryblue75]

Hhaahhah

[@adale2771]

😂😂😂😂

[@MsGoodlife78]

I love me some Martha + Anybody but this...Martha+Stephen definitely takes the cake!!😊💜 Priceless

[@BroAnarchy]

LITERALLY 😏

[@ChineduOpara]

Literally!

[@april4769]

Martha & Snoop are probably my favorite Duo but Martha & Stephen are a close 2nd 😁

[@Petercarmo93]

omg I'm cracking up. this is one of the funniest interviews I've seen in a long time. Martha Stewart is awesome!

[@LXSeaV]

She’s always a great guest 😂

[@coolcat8b]

Martha is such a treat. 🌺 Please invite her more often, and not only for cake.

[@Kwippy]

Oh yes please! And please ask her advice on how to do insider trading, and how to survive prison.

[@annamorgan9069]

@@Kwippy Sure, why not.

[@mrt1151]

NOTHING under the leather pants... That's hot! 🔥

[@mullen25]

martha stewart is charming and funny with any tv host. look at her history of appearances. and stephen is the perfect partner to banter with.

[@wjcroft72]

Stephen's improv banter is belly-laugh approved.

[@kenek629]

It's really taken me like 20 mins to get through 7:01 to the end because this took a turn I was not expecting. To be the guest lucky enough to flirt with Stephen Colbert and have him flirt back... 😍

[@jamesgoines7663]

Ken find the Nicki Minaj segment with Stephen. You can see his face turn completely red.

[@Leeohlin89]

Oh it’s happened several several times before lol

[@susannet.401]

Lol I almost wasn’t gonna watch this.. but then I’m soo glad I did 😆 did not expect this to be this entertaining

[@JoustingJosie]

Same

[@lionking0110]

Lol me too

[@exupierre]

I did not see this segment going this direction!! That was the best!!! Love them both!! 😂

[@naoise555]

I think Martha's on her second bottle of Chard.

[@kryss.4725]

38 Crimes, that.

[@fvkijay]

Never thought I'd ever want to be on a date with Martha Stewart before but here we are 😍

[@venkatsarma007]

Can't believe the fact that Martha is 80 years old. She looks young.

[@atxabaltarra]

SHE'S WHAT?!!! OMG she looks gorgeous!

[@elisemiller13]

@@atxabaltarra Gee! what money can buy!

[@snohskye7810]

@@elisemiller13 a lot of mf rich 80yr olds don’t look as good as Martha!

[@Belforhir]

I guess jail was good for her :p

[@lurklingX]

plastic surgery. come one bro, seriously. (also, with her manner, i totally believe it. acts like the gram parents i know.)

[@robertk4898]

Martha Stewart is just so much more relatable since she did her time in the slammer. It may have made her stocks dip for a while & cost her hundreds of millions but it made her so much more fun to watch! Before that I thought she came off as a bit snooty but I always loved her. She's always been a guilty pleasure of mine. It's just, now I feel it's cool to admit it.

[@bestcrossroad]

So enjoyable! Martha can dish it! And Stephen is so sweet like a great date! Thank you for this. 💖💖💖 (Edited for spelling)

[@19ashe86]

OMG this was great. So much flirting I love it

[@Flashtone08]

Steven out here actin single. Bet he's wife was dying laughing watching this.

[@mariekastler5391]

Love, LOVE Martha❣️❣️❣️ Remember, she was a model in the '80s...in New York(!). I would LOVE to hang with Martha and get her talking! She and Stephen pretending to flirt is, now, EVERYTHING! Stephen bringing up Evie at the end just makes me love all three of them, More!

[@maureenshea4268]

She was a model in the 60’s!

[@LindaC616]

Not a model in the 80s...

[@hannabaal150]

A model, okay, but not a role model.

[@annamorgan9069]

@@hannabaal150 she was definitely a role model back in the day. Her magazine was all about being the quintessential homemaker.

[@cwilson9636]

Love Colbert ❤️ and Martha is always a joy to see.🥰🥰

[@southernphunk]

She’s blasted lol love her

[@akshelby33]

I came here to see if anyone else thought so.

[@cleverusername9369]

I think she must've had a bottle of 19 Crimes before this segment. Btw, not a white wine guy, but Martha's Chard is actually pretty good

[@mariekastler5391]

She's blasted and Stephen's improv training took over... Yay! We Win!!!

[@davidcattin7006]

Never saw Colbert so laid back. I like it! Martha looks great!

[@MsKylea]

Im 41 and have been watching Martha since I was a kid. Why does this lady STILL look the Same?!?!

[@debrahelmlinger6256]

Money

[@rosalindscotton5629]

MONEY!!!😎💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰💵💰

[@leapintothewild]

@@debrahelmlinger6256 And TONS of $500 moisturizer! 😁

[@lmichelle80sbaby]

Same here, lol! And I was thinking the EXACT same thing!!😁

[@lurklingX]

plastic surgery.

[@ThatADHDKid]

This was great! Bring her back on frequently 😂

[@BradGryphonn]

Is that the Aussie '19 Crimes' wine brand? if so, well done, Martha, and well done, 19 Crimes. You don't get on a 19 crimes label unless your crime was noteworthy. Rock n Roll!

[@InfiniteSoulRoots]

Snoop started his collab with the company first, & released Snoop Cali Red & Snoop Cali Rosé within the past couple of years. Martha just decided to follow suit. :)

[@4333carol]

The labels are fabulous

[@BradGryphonn]

@@4333carol They are very cool. I'm not a wine drinker but sometimes I'm tempted to collect wines for the unique labelling designs and art...and quirky names.

[@rugby_jtizzle]

Martha is hilarious!! Omg you two together crack me tf up 😂😂 (that cake looks 👌🏽)

[@sdgoes99]

Sounds like Martha’s first dates have been with Bond villains.

[@austinchaseofficial]

Or just Hannibal Lecter

[@retired4365]

She's seems so damn fun to hang with.

[@noteanoshade7788]

This was really funny and enjoyable to watch these two interact lmao

[@konstancjamaleszynska8656]

I haven’t laughed like this in a while. That Polish feisty spirit 😂 I want to be like her when I grow up 🔥

[@janedoe247]

I LOVE Martha Stewart!!!

[@batgurrl]

Martha seemed pretty BAKED already. Great banter and segment.

[@--Adam]

This made me laugh just like when Martha would go on Dave back in the day.

[@bettyveronica9880]

Reminds me of that, too! 😂😂😂😂😂👍🏻

[@petrinasmith6853]

I was thinking the same thing!

[@thecrazycelt5143]

So flipping hilarious! I miss Dave!

[@ThePemaquidpoint]

These two are a delight together! I always enjoy their segments! Please do more soon.....

[@paulorganisation1]

Even when she is being serious it seems she is flirting😂that voice...

[@serendipityshopnyc]

They do great banter together, I must say! Some of the funniest flirting I've ever seen on TV.

[@13699111]

Love respect Martha Stewart positive example for never giving up hope in life

[@rikkiechambers4959]

Omg dying laughing .. best date ever !

[@rdgreeley]

Our new “Betty White”! I love her perfect date scenario: why mess around? Private jet, island…. 🤣

[@Belforhir]

No. Betty White was better in every way. For example: If Betty White ever broke federal laws at least she was smart enough to get away with it! :p

[@brendashelonko2149]

@@Belforhir Pfffttt that was penny ante, she should have only been fined. Wall Street doesn’t like uppity women. Now how’s about going after the inside traders in Congress?

[@Leeohlin89]

The way she flirted back was hilarious! 😂

[@tigq1430]

No wonder Snoop enjoys her company!💃🤗💜🙋‍♀️👍✌🤭

[@presentfuture7563]

Don't show him this, he might get jealous 😂

[@PeshadonnaXO]

She is hilarious 🤣

[@wanderfunk]

New life goals: Save up to take Martha Stewart to a private island on a private jet.

[@mecahunter7092]

😊

[@jeffreyjeziorski7646]

And, apparently, a clothing optional beach. Martha has an leather pants on, nothing on underneath, and they are hot. Don't forget the creme fraishe.

[@Lepidopterous.]

3:21 Dude, Stephen your ability to multi-task whilst baking supersedes even MARTHA STEWART 😂😂

[@robthegod9062]

I dig Martha. She is a real one.

[@Cali_909]

I can't believe she's 80!!! Love Martha!

[@frankcarter7146]

I love Martha

[@baigalmaatsolmonbaatar7421]

The best thing I’ve watched ever on a Valentine’s day!

[@ionokiero5141]

Omg she can get it!! She sounds fun and to the point!

[@bernitajenkins3180]

Yep. Snoop put her onto the best ganja... 😉 Freakin'hilarious.

[@leapintothewild]

Heck, watch her with Dave back in the day - she’s flirty and fun way before Snoop and his weed! 😆

[@jaymeelk9380]

Martha is the greatest! Wanna make anything, she will have the best recipe and show you how. She is an Icon of all good living.

[@Scarlett-jq4cj]

OMG Stephen STAHP. That was good fun. Ya'll made me feel like I was at a party again.

[@carlychamberlain4237]

Her banter has only gotten better over the years lol snoop is a good influence

[@lmichelle80sbaby]

IT WOULD DEFINITELY APPEAR THAT WAY!!! As I was laughing, I was thinking the exact same thing!!😁

[@patriciadean5320]

Gotta love Martha

[@zizinnnn]

martha deserves her own stephen 💙

[@steveschmit7529]

I grew up in a wine region in Europe. Putting ice in your wine? This means war.

[@LindaC616]

😄 then you know that in southern Spain, they put it in red, along with tonic water, in the summer

[@NewMessage]

"Martha's WHAT?" -My wife, after mishearing 'chard' slightly.

[@buzzlightyearg3580]

Oh this became tv gold with Martha Stewart dope

[@CAP198462]

“Crème fraiche” - Randy If we were playing a drinking game where l drink for every innuendo, I’d be ☠️

[@geoffreyschultz8515]

When Stephen put some cream in her mouth, I almost expected him to say, “I’m not sure we can do this on CBS” and have it blurred out.

[@kenek629]

@@geoffreyschultz8515 no honestly same. I feel like this and licking the cum cupcake are the most risky things Stephen's done so far

[@shawnat8799]

I'm back. Need to see this 5 more times today.

[@genagena127]

I enjoyed this completely!! Love you Stephen!!

[@SN-sz7kw]

Naturals. These two are so comfortably hysterical.

[@liquidSpin]

Martha Stewart is on another level 😂

[@deleaiseporter1913]

This is a good segment 🤣😂🤣🤣

[@Mariah.can0]

Hahahha this is my favourite interview ever 😂😜🥂🎂

[@bettyveronica9880]

I have new respect for Martha! 😂🍰 Stephen: "You have leather pants on. They're hot." Martha: "And there's nothing underneath them." 😱😲😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😜😳😳😳😳

[@royalpain024]

Martha is such a babe! That leather pant comment was outrageous!!!

[@Seli.em54]

“That’s my problem, I don’t listen”. Me too Martha, me too

[@wendy5116]

Laughed so hard during this 😂😂😂💕

[@IzThizThingOn]

Her friendship with Snoop has really loosened her up.

[@ginahill503]

Martha is such a great gal! She' be fun to be friends with. I just love her!

[@rosalindscotton5629]

Martha has been sitting out in the sun, she's got a lot of color to her skin and her hair is beautiful too. You go Martha, you're looking good girl. 😎💕

[@1destinyslegacy]

Greatest date I've ever witnessed...

[@reeseew5508]

This was hilarious!! 😆🤣😂

[@mayap6055]

Stephen is on fire

[@899tamara]

Martha and Stephen OMG 😆

[@janedoe247]

I LOVE this one so much!!!!!!!!!

[@Mister006]

This wasn't a Martha Stewart segment, this was a Martha sale! She's an amazing saleswoman! Stephen set her up perfectly to get got!

[@maggiediedhiou4208]

Best episode ever 🤣😂🤣

[@zeldasmith6154]

She's funny. Great hair color and cut. Great laugh. I don't know her personally but I would think it would be very challenging for a guy to date her. She's been a media star for decades, has an empire and worth millions maybe even a billion when you list her assets. She's smart and doesn't suffer fools at all.

[@classicalaid1]

Not even when she went to jail for years.

[@ryanm4319]

@@classicalaid1 so? It was for inside trading lol, do you know how many people should be in jail for that. Do you have any clue how many actors and stars have spent time in prison? Lol

[@pattilundgren7627]

@@classicalaid1, "she went to jail for years" -- what?!? She served FIVE MONTHS in a minimum security prison. Not years. Interestingly, she chose to go to prison before her appeal was heard. In other words, if she had waited until after her appeal, she might not have been sentenced to prison at all. It was an extremely pragmatic choice. And she made friends in prison! She has so many anecdotes.

[@Essex121514]

@@ryanm4319 I don't understand what your piint is.

[@Essex121514]

@@pattilundgren7627 I am pretty sure this guy was agreeing with the OP. What's your beef?

[@catherinereynolds9644]

Martha, darling! You look fabulous!!

[@moniqm3607]

Love this, thank you!

[@antionettewilson4250]

Well that was fun 😍‼️

[@lyran8947]

One of the best segment ever. Please do more with Martha..... I mean segment.

[@nicolek.1839]

I’m such a fan of Martha now.

[@elmerfudd5193]

I LOVE the Fact that between a lily white old lady and Snoop, she’s the felon 🤪😜😂🤣🤣🤣😅😂😂

[@LindaC616]

😄

[@curiousandcreativewithwand8515]

b/c he was aquitted of murder in 1993 ;) his bodyguard did it.

[@Roslowich89c9040]

That looked like a fun date, even without the flight

[@taostone8065]

So Martha tells Steven she's not wearing any underwear and his response is to cream in her mouth. 😂

[@briandiaz2234]

Fabulous bit! 💛💛❤️

[@enricomigliorini9612]

"People in Italy put ice in their white wine" From Italy, this is a falsehood. It is indeed anathema.

[@chrissiek8706]

People in Italy, not Italians 😅 she might have been drinking with other American tourists and for the good tips waiters won't even frown

[@rebekkad.2092]

Have always loved Martha. I always will.

[@ambassadorsoffire4150]

This was AWESOME.. I love when you do skits, cooking and animals with celebrities. Too funny.. looks natural

[@dawnstanley1733]

Gotta love Martha!

[@meredithmiller9641]

I love Martha. She is so great. 😍

[@nickkacures2304]

Great show!!!!!Every time I see Martha Stewart I think of how many crooked politicians especially on the right that inhabited the last White House and are not in prison. The millions of crimes on Wall Street and in corporate America that go unpunished . But when a female celebrity stubs her toe she gets the full weight of criminal prosecution thrown at her . She did wrong but on the scale of the blindfolded lady of justice it was a minor issue

[@bafflezbiz]

Oh, she's not so innocent and she's certainly on the right. But yes, all of these criminals deserve justice. Her sentence was a short stay at Club Med and then a 'stay-at -home' order that we've all endured throughout Covid. Clearly, she's doing just fine, and she still has all the money.

[@anamariaguadayol2335]

Agree

[@nickkacures2304]

@@bafflezbiz you have placed your thumb metaphorically very heavily on the scales of justice in favor of countless millions of offenses that are extremely more illegal than Martha Stewart’s . Yes let’s prosecute Martha but if we did that fairly across the lines of gender race and ethnicity we would be building an extreme amount of prisons that you would need to wear sunglasses inside them because they were so white with corporate crooks and the politicians they purchased .

[@bafflezbiz]

Of course. Most crimes go unpunished. And even more "white collar" crimes are either ignored or on the fringes of legality, the gray area that is often punished with a fine that's accounted as 'the cost of doing business'. Think of all the people rotting in jail over drug offenses. Simply eating a plant that affects your mind is considered a carnal sin. It's ludicrous. And even more inane and insane, we inflict the same punishment for murder, shoplifting, hate speech, tax evasion, public nudity, assault with a deadly weapon, stalking, jaywalking, pissing in an alley. Locked in a cage. We haven't progressed an inch in millennia. The choices have been either death or a cage. Are we really this stupid?

[@kitcoffey7194]

@@bafflezbiz Well, the US is. Other nations like Norway have restored some humanity to their justice systems, and offer education and true rehabilitation. The US needs to learn. The US incarcerates more of its citizens than any other nation. See the documentary "The House I Live In."

[@MidwestFamilyRecipes]

This is the best one yet 🤣

[@donnefasto5310]

To date Martha, you better be on your way out of jail. 🤣😅🤣

[@_kornick]

This one takes the cake!!!

[@csdragonfly]

Ice in the wine is a crime in Europe. EVERYWHERE in Europe. You'd be arrested here in Portugal... 😂