Too Much Emphasis on Waiting?

[@TheRealDaytime]

Do you think we put too much emphasis on virginity?

[@angell.purvis8741]

We need to celebrate virginity until we find that significant other.

[@LMLification]

Nope, as women, we need to be selective on who gets our cookies. Sleeping with the wrong man, whether it is your first partner or not, can indeed have detrimental effects.

[@shanice_a]

Yes we do . It's like past a certain age you are expected to have been lost your virginity and sleeping with this one , that one and the third. I'm 26 , going to be 27 in 3 days and I'm still a virgin . I'm waiting until I find the right man and have a MEANINGFUL relationship .

[@Mrsqueen876]

@@shanice_a that's beautiful

[@WAKINUPwithDee]

@@shanice_a that’s really wonderful. I truly hate when people are shamed for being virgins beyond like teen years. Not all of us want to give ourselves to just anyone. Kudos to you for sure!

[@replay_kill7991]

dropping your pants is NOT gonna make u feel more included with other people ! Jeannie Preach !!

[@a.sydney5036]

I mean...it’s terrible to do it just “to fit in”...but...from experience, it definitely changes the dynamics of friendships when everyone is having sex and you’re not, nor dating. Because that whole part of their lives they probably won’t feel comfortable discussing with you. Even as an adult.

[@maddie3329]

@@a.sydney5036 although I agree that it does change the dynamic, I don’t think having sex one time will change it enough to feel included, as you’re not experienced enough to actually join in any conversation. In that case she would have to sleep around which would just make her feel bad about herself. Feeling included is never worth sacrificing your body and vulnerability to a stranger if you don’t want to.

[@britbritnicole]

Bring a virgin is still taboo after a certain age and I think that’s unfair. Don’t do what everybody else is doing, do what’s best for you.

[@aissam.2420]

Yes!!👍

[@NancyVMusic1993]

You are correct!

[@sammierose1150]

I think we put too much emphasis on *WOMEN’S* virginity only. It’s very misogynistic. If women have to wait, so should men. Men should also have respect for their bodies as well. No equality until we’re all held to the same standards.

[@angelinemutsengi2148]

@@sammierose1150 Kinda but not really. On the flip side if a man gets to let's say 21 and they are still a virgin or waiting until marriage then they are ridiculed ALOT.

[@angelinemutsengi2148]

@@sammierose1150 But I 100% agree with you.

[@priscillamhidalgo]

I waited till I was married. I was 25. So glad I did because it was so special. I will always remember that night

[@jmeiahb2608]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@MrAllysonn]

I would have "exchanged" those not so great experience for waiting for my husband, really. I deeply regret.

[@Den3girl]

Lol the people who lost theirs before also remember that night...or day haha

[@erowo8767]

@@Den3girl no one ever said they didn't

[@cornersworthcleaning8472]

Me too but married at 21

[@niqualeee]

I’m 30 & I’m not sure I’m going to wait until marriage, but I value myself enough to wait until I meet the man that I know is worthy of being with me (all aspects of me) not just my body.

[@niqualeee]

@Kaylin Carey thanks ❤️

[@sammierose1150]

I think we put too much emphasis on *WOMEN’S* virginity only. It’s very misogynistic. If women have to wait, so should men. Men should also have respect for their bodies as well. No equality until we’re all held to the same standards.

[@niqualeee]

@@sammierose1150 I totally agree

[@helenmayberry6010]

@Niqua Lee 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@KatiKosta]

🙌🙌🙌

[@signalfire15]

Adrienne's story about her friend YES GIRL!!!! That is a young lady who is confident and assured in herself!

[@bookbag6432]

Ask your friends about the stress of taking pregnancy tests and STD tests and then you’ll wait. If all your friends are sleeping with strangers at 18, you need a new group of friends.

[@tamerilee]

‼️‼️‼️

[@mckenzie.8653]

Eh, I'd rather friends who practice safe and consensual sex and are honest about it than people who judge others

[@ajohonly3721]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 facts

[@adreanaheavenholland]

You shouldn’t judge others on how they choose to express their sexuality though.

[@maddie3329]

Having friends that judge who others sleep with is toxic. They will turn on you if you choose to sleep with someone they don’t agree with and that is more toxic than sleeping around.

[@MajesticMyronn]

I feel like we live in a world that is now so oversexualized that people are more concerned with getting the deed done with anybody they’re sexually attracted to rather than someone they’re emotionally tied to... which is why for me I don’t like the pressure of either “ HAVING” to wait nor do I like the pressure of feeling like because everyone else is doing it... I don’t want be the odd ball out so let me lose it too ! I don’t focus on the pressures that society puts on me... I actually would like to wait... why because it’s MY CHOICE !,,

[@Yeahthisisme7]

Me : All I hear is possible diseases, pregnancy, emotional roll coaster if your period is late, someone who may not respect your intimacy on the long run, the list goes on & it ain’t worth it to be with some random person 😩😩😩😩😩 Sis you on the good side of things & don’t let anyone make you feel like you missing out. As much as sex can be beautiful, in the wrong circumstances & conditions, it can quickly turn to a disaster 😕😕😕

[@ifyouwantoreplyjustclickth5063]

Finally someone who thinks the same! Do people not care about all those risks?? Thats all i can think. And some people really are manipulative. They make you think they love you, just to have you for sex, then leave. Too much emotional drama. Im glad my husband and i were both when we got married. I have no shame in it.

[@agathachris9722]

Inviting trauma in your life. So many people I know come from decent families, get into a relationship with men who mess them up completely just because they fell for the Okei doke of hook up culture.

[@tamerilee]

This was literally ME! don’t do it girl 😭😭😭😭😭 those college boys don’t be about sht at ALLL get a good toy and wait for someone that care 😩

[@kaitlynb4171]

I’m almost 25 and still a virgin. And I’m pretty comfortable with it until I start comparing my life with other people who’ve already been intimate with someone. But there really hasn’t been anyone I’ve felt connected with to the point of sleeping with them so I’m just waiting and trying not to compare my life to others because that really isn’t fair to anyone. Much love to the virgins out there, age is just a number 💕

[@dodji582]

Don't lose it for nothing, it is very very valuable, some men will spend millions just to get that.

[@VONiiE8]

Don’t compare yourself to others, your journey is not theirs. Don’t be in a rush just bc ppl are out here hooking up. Wait for the time *you* think is right. I lost mine at 26 when I was ready, not bc other ppl were hooking up or bc I had pressure to lose my virginity. I don’t regret it. If waiting works for you, whether that be waiting for marriage or just waiting until you’re comfortable enough with someone, then do that. But don’t just sleep with someone just bc of society, especially if you’re still a virgin. You’ll always remember your first time and it’ll affect how you’ll view sex in the future.

[@VellaBella4]

To the young lady that asked this question: DON’T LISTEN TO YOUR FRIENDS OR PRESSURE FROM GUYS. Do what you want to do because you genuinely want to. All my friends in high school were rushing to have sex and they ended pregnant and unhappy. I’m 28 now and all those girls aren’t doing anything important. Please take your time. Age shouldn’t be a factor.

[@AaAa-qq5wr]

@@user-ht9oc7gw1f agreed

[@NancyVMusic1993]

Stuff like this is why I did wait until marriage, and why my spouse waited, too! I waited at first for religious reasons, but then I waited for me 🤷🏻‍♀️ no judgments to people who don’t wait, I’m just talking about me!

[@shanias.3915]

Did it hurt ? I wish I would've found God earlier in life and remained pure till marriage. However, my boyfriend (future husband) and I abstain from sex (4 months clean) and we have a stronger connection than ever.

[@agathachris9722]

I always wonder when people say they waited for religious reason and then say they waited for themselves. Do you believe in your religion because you are forced too? I wait because the I agree with the principles of the religion I follow which believes that life is significantly better with people wgo control their urges, form committed relationships before giving such a meaningful part of yourself to your partner. Society is better that way. Those are my opinions and the beliefs of my religion and so I waited for me. I don't understand how someone can believe in a religion but still separate that from themselves.

[@dajahlockett2503]

I would much rather have felt left out than give it up just to feel included, but it took years for me to realize that

[@priskah242]

There is too much emphasis on losing it. Don't rush. Nothing before it's time.

[@SashaWnNa]

Some wish they could turn back the hands of time. I’ll continue to wait until marriage🙏🏾

[@kaylaa.eroseeee]

People do too much when it comes to this. 😂 Do it when you’re ready and you feel like you’re meant to. If you want to wait, then wait. Also don’t let the peer pressure of others doing it make you want to lol. Usually you remember your first time and you should enjoy it.

[@asante291]

That’s literally what they said. Is it not?

[@esetababes]

Girrrrrrl, waiting for the right man is so special and important. Trust me! You don’t wanna get involved with wrong people. Please don’t feel pressured ❤️

[@devronl08]

I’m a 31 year old male and a virgin. And proud of it! It’ll happen when I want it to. So far, the right person hasn’t come along, and that’s cool.

[@natalielagunas9037]

Love the story Adrienne’s shared ♥️ - & a sex convo is never complete on this show without Lonnie’s sex convo dance !!! Ooh YeAhhh *snap* 😂

[@jmeiahb2608]

She loves that 😭😭 hilarious

[@sheeshneesh]

Right lmaoo. Love Loni. 😂

[@nk__shot9183]

🖤💜💙💚❤

[@KharisB.A]

That dance of hers cracks me up😂😂😂😂 every time she does it

[@carlalouiseboothe5235]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Loni honestly cracks me up! And it was so funny the way the video ended right in the middle of her sex dance. Oooh yeah 😂

[@jessy7785]

My first was special and over 20 years have past and we are still good friends. I will never regret it and always remember it 😊

[@karlenewilliams9353]

Amen Adrienne and Jeannie! My mom always told me that same saying that Adrienne spoke of.

[@lerato_masuku2124]

Adrienne's story🥺.. It needed to be told indeed 💯

[@VeronicaRkive]

At the age of 24 I became pretty aware about it too. Felt left out and my cousins seemed so open about it. One of my long time friends tho encouraged me and said to never settle until you’re ready don’t let others pressure you into something you might not be ready for. You do you. 💛💛

[@bfree4830]

Yes it’s a great thing to have support 😊

[@shaedavis53]

I'm 32 and a PROUD VIRGIN!!!! Waiting on Mr. Right ❤❤❤

[@kacidenise7496]

I lost my virginity to a close guy friend just to get it over with. I had to sneak out and walk to his house and then sneak into his house, do the do , then sneak back out and walk home and sneak back into my house at 2am. And I wish I would have waited 😩 but everything happens for a reason. Wait for the right person when the time is right you'll know!

[@Simplelivingslowliving]

Absolutely

[@JayeKisses]

While I was in high school all my friends that were having sex were always complaining about the relationship that they were in & asking me the single virgin what to do & most cases when they DIDNT ask for my help the relationship would be over AFTER they had sex. I’ve also heard a lot of people say “It was awful the first time. I should have waited.” I just agree with them.

[@JayeKisses]

21 year old happy virgin here to say “It’s YOUR Choice!” Choose wisely & I personally feel like waiting is strength not to follow the crowd that is having sex. U should never feel pressured to have sex it should always feel comfortable & personal to u! I’m waiting for marriage because I’ll know my husband loves me & genuinely wants to be with me. I’m not gonna give it away to douche bag guy that I might not be with a month from now.

[@bfree4830]

Yess, you go girl!

[@JayeKisses]

@@bfree4830 thank u

[@shanias.3915]

@@JayeKisses Yes baby! I'm 25 and wish I could go back... The guy I'm with, my future husband, we decided together to abstain from sex until we get married! Our love is stronger. We were so focused on sex at first and looking back it's disgusting. Sex is for married couples! It's a beautiful thing to honor your temple and wait to become ONE with God.

[@JayeKisses]

@@shanias.3915 wow

[@sapphire125582]

I waited until marriage at 25. So glad that I did!

[@JazFae90]

Adrienne is 100% right! That's what I tell my brother. I told him that he doesn't need to rush it.

[@melindac9391]

I agree with the ladies overall sentiment. The young girl posing the question literally is putting all the emphasis on being “left out” girl if you are feeling that pressured, then you shouldn’t act out on it. It’s called peer pressure, do it when you are ready, when it’s the time to lose your virginity you will feel it, and I promise you if it’s with the right person who makes you feel comfortable and YOU’RE ready it will be worth while.

[@shaneltwaha9362]

Am 22 and still waiting untill marriage ,so keep it girl untill your in a relationship atleast with the person who loves you and the person you love.

[@RyanJCreations]

I’ll be 21 in July and I’ve never had a real first kiss yet and yes I’m still a virgin. After watching this I realize that I have the wrong friends because I get made fun of for being “innocent”. Meanwhile their getting pumped, dumped, and led astray….how dare they even try to come at me like that? but I don’t say anything because I don’t judge them. This way of thinking comes with maturity I think. I’ve talked to women in their 30s & 50s about it and I was like “should I just do it and get it over with. I’m tired of being this way” and they immediately said NOOOOOO do NOT do that. WAIT for someone you actually love.

[@LeonardoDiCapri-Sun]

Yeah those people aren’t your friends! I’m in a similar position but my friends have never ever made fun of me for it. Honestly their pregnancy scares are enough to put me off for life anyway.

[@sonrisaverdean757]

It depends on the person. Some people can handle causal sex. Others cannot. It depends on their personality. Casual sex is not necessarily bad, if someone can handle it. It only becomes bad when someone realizes they cannot. As long as people are being safe with condoms and Birth control, then it is really up to them. No matter what a person chooses to do--It's all okay and it is all acceptable as long as they are safe and they know what they can handle.

[@maddie3329]

I 100% agree, but I still think your first time should be with someone who at least cares about you because it is a vulnerable experience. I’ve had many one night stands and most of the guys end up not being the nicest afterwards and if you see them again they just treat you like meat and it’s not very nice. I couldn’t imagine my first time being with the guy who just got himself off then left. That would be terrible.

[@agathachris9722]

Most people can't handle casual sex and some people that think they can, discover years later when they can't commit to anything that they too couldn't handle casual sex. The truth is, putting yourself at constant risk for the sake of sexual gratification is destructive.

[@ashleyspurling5701]

@@agathachris9722 so what, we need to tie people down and put locks on their private parts for their own good?

[@jmeiahb2608]

It should be taken seriously. Soul ties are real.

[@mt3388]

Absolutely!

[@gleander4405]

Your body is a temple. Listen to your own feelings.

[@maddie3329]

I want to tell this girl that I promise not everyone is doing it. I was actually so surprised once I got to college to learn how many people haven’t had sex. Please do not just have sex with anyone because you will feel gross about yourself afterwards. At least be friends with the person first and trust them enough to know they value your comfort and your emotions. It’s shocking how many guys do not care if you’re having a good time or if they’re hurting you. It’s a weird experience being that vulnerable with someone for the first time, so you should try to be as comfortable with the person you’re doing it with as possible

[@goodday4974]

I don't wanna be like Cinderella Sitting in a dark, cold, dusty cellar Waiting for somebody to come and set me free I don't wanna be like Snow White waiting For a handsome prince to come and save me On a horse of white, unless we're riding side by side Don't wanna depend on no one else I'd rather rescue myself. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@shanias.3915]

I'm weak as hell cause you singing Cheetah Girls randomly 🤣🤣🤣

[@tt2841]

This is so random!😭😭😭

[@tiffdawn4428]

I agree with Jeannie, because if she has sex because her friends are, or they say they are (cause people be lying especially at that age), she’s always gonna try to keep up with them.

[@fudgeinyopajamanas]

I wish I would’ve waited ! I admire what Adri said I love it !!!! Put the haters in their place ! Perrrioood

[@misstay710]

I don't think you have to wait until marriage but I do believe it is best to share your first time with someone special. I waited until I was 24. He was my bf at the time and now he's my husband. Even if we wouldn't have worked out after that I would not have regretted my decision because I was ready to share that moment with someone I loved and cared for. Do it because you want to and feel you're ready, not because everyone else is doing it.

[@Nique1986]

Being a virgin to me is a beautiful thing it should be celebrated I wish I had waited longer but I also feel that if your not one there’s nothing wrong with that either !!!!!

[@benta2]

Waiting will always be worth it❣️

[@Carlyon100]

Swapping STIs too🙄😷. Don't fall for it; some of them doing the do wish they could have a do over.

[@signalfire15]

Man, I must have run in different circles because none of my friends were having sex at 18 lol. And the ones that were did not brag about it in front of me, as if it was something great that they were accomplishing... I think she needs to expand her circle of friends and find some people who are focused on different things.

[@betzabethrosas3981]

Exactly! I went through the same situation and I realized that there was nothing wrong with me but the people I was hanging around with

[@agathachris9722]

I do too. Most of my friends and their husbands were virgins when they married.

[@tamerilee]

Jeannie is right just hooking up don’t make u feel better bc all the emotions be having u like whyyy😭😭 not worth the stress

[@ofeliagomezz]

You go Adrienne 🙌🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@melloncollieinfinitesadness]

Btw, let's be careful/mindful and refrain from shaming women during this topic. please and thank you.

[@AbigaillOwusu]

I hope the young lady watches this and reads the comments encouraging her to wait ..

[@distorbia20]

You never get over it. Girl hold on to it. Don’t give it to anyone just for the sake of it. God created you with care so why just loosely give yourself away. Also girls catch feelings quickly. Nope nope nope. I am so glad for my faith.

[@katiescorner5879]

I’m 21 and I’m waiting until I’m married! No regrets at all.

[@tatianadaniel3569]

If anything, people overemphasize criticizing those who want to wait.

[@tamerilee]

What Adrienne said!!!

[@sammierose1150]

I personally feel like you (as a man or woman) shouldn’t have one-night stands - but not necessarily wait till marriage either. Do it when you’re ready and YOU feel comfortable. No one else. I feel we put too much emphasis on *WOMEN’S* virginity only. It’s very misogynistic. If women have to wait, so should men. Men should also have respect for their bodies as well. No equality until we’re all held to the same standards.

[@natashajoyy4223]

Dont rush for nothing. If you wanna wait you wait

[@angell.purvis8741]

In addition, you don't want the person you slept with to give you a venereal disease either just because you want to be accepted by these so-called peers. Don't let the peer pressure define the excellence of your well being. Be YOU always. You'll thank yourself later in life. Be a proud celebate virgin. Enjoy your single life until you find THE ONE.

[@angell.purvis8741]

Men will respect you more... when you say NO.... always demand the respect. Like that song by Alicia Key's A woman's worth. You're so much worth the wait.

[@kinndah2519]

When you feel ready to accept whatever potential consequences and responsibilities come with sex, then you're ready. Waiting or not waiting doesn't automatically mean it will be great. You can have good sex with someone you don't care about, or if you're a loving relationship. It could also suck with someone you care about. Having multiple partners also gives you experience. There's good and bad in both choices.

[@susanl8592]

Yes Loni, you ALWAYS remember your first!!!! 🙌💯

[@susfar]

Nobody has to wait but surely now that I am 28 and sexually active for half my life I totally wish I could take some of them off the list. Most men are selfish in bed and you sure don’t want your first experience to be only about pleasing him. Being a grown woman now I wish I had someone I trusted to advice me at that age. Being from Middle Eastern background growing up in Europe made it hard to speak to my mom about such topics. And girls start losing their virginity at a very young age where I’m from. Adrienne really hit the nail on the head with how much it means emotionally and physiologically and how it makes you feel attached and it could really hurt your self worth when you do it with the wrong guy. To all my virgin sisters, take pride in it and keep this to yourself for as long as you can.

[@deem132]

That’s a great like Adrienne, I think ima use that one if I need to 😂

[@Lalalalala...]

I don't feel like you should have to wait. I don't think you should do it because of peer pressure. But if you want to do it because you want to do it, then think it through first. If you still want to do it after thinking it through and it feels right, then do it

[@kendrickmagee672]

I'm a virgin and I'm 39 years old I am saving myself for someone special whoever she is

[@sweetpotato6728]

Virginity is a social construct which is usually pressured onto women. Some women wait and wait and wait until they are 50 when they are way past their reproductive age, or when they're not as physically fit anymore and everything is sagging. I'm not saying people should have sex haphazardly, but it's a beautiful thing and there's nothing wrong with enjoying it while in your physical prime. Tying your sexual experience to a magical perfect husband (that may never arrive for some people) takes away from one's personal agency. Compatibility and character are what determine the success of a marriage, not virginity. And people should do it whenever they are ready.

[@lindaw1322]

Amen Adrienne! Yes girl ! 🙌🙌

[@sonrisaverdean757]

Adrienne not everyone needs to love someone to have sex with them. That applies to you and many others and that is fine. But the latter is fine too.

[@angelinemutsengi2148]

I think she means in this specific being a virgin situation cause she's also had 'relationships' where it was just fucking etc but I think she means because it will be your first and opening experience into your sexuality and sex etc it should be with someone who at the very least cares about you. I know alot of people that went the one night stand lemme lose it quick route and not one of them has said that they didn't regret it. They all have but now I mean they are banging whoever with no emotion but list but they still feel like for that 1st experience, they shoulda waited until they atleast liked the person

[@TwiFiveGirls101]

I love what Adrienne's friend said cuz I wish had said something like that to take off the ALL the mean girls and boys who would bully me for being a virgin. As a young lady it was hurtful then but now I wish I hadn't let those mean words get to me and been more proud of my virgin status.

[@indigo_blue_s2830]

Jeannie nailed it, if you feel like an outsider in sex talks, having sex once is not going to make you feel included.

[@diamondfblful]

Am I the only one that think they are WAY off guard? I’m glad none of them have daughters currently and I hope they learn better information if they ever do.

[@whitediamond3992]

I remember all of my friends and all the popular girls would talk about it and I sadly lied and said I had had sex already.

[@keokpala8562]

I agree with those who are saying there are too much emphasis on female virginity because people should also get at men about waiting too the same way they do women smh.Its true you are more likely to avoid so many problems by waiting til marriage,but also waiting to you find the one or til marriage will not guarantee that it will be magical either for every single person that waited because let's keep it real some people may not necessarily be sexually compatible with that person and just so many other things that isn't discussed about waiting js.But waiting is a better option in my opinion because there more benefits

[@navneetmadhray8974]

I agree with this but I think the same should be for men - we tell women to wait till they’re ready and let it be special etc which is great but it needs to be said to men too.

[@haryel5058]

Uhm interesting .. 1/ Like AD said you don't know their real feelings. It can be trauma involved and they don't want to feel left out so they encourage you to do the same mistakes 2/ I'll say change your friends ? Be with people that make you feel good about yourself and seen and understanding. 3/ You are so young and I can understand why you'll feel left out but you have time to have sex. 4/ It's not because you are proud of being a virgin that everyone you interact with should know that. Protect your energy

[@siaf2398]

I was that woman and felt like something was wrong with me. No. she def. should not just do to fit in. that special person will come and you will know when it's right.

[@geekyboy6875]

A lot of ppl drum up sex and etc it’s just sex. Don’t bring religion or society or ur friends into it. Listen to your body listen ur mind you know what you want and what you need to what is best for you not peer pressure to wait or to have sex. You’ll remember the experience and the feeling you had. If you wait simply cause ppl tell you to ur gonna make it bigger and more grandiose in ur head than it actually is and if you have it cause of Peer pressure your gonna feel bad and regret it have it when you feel ready and be safe

[@zannieholmes8555]

Be true to yourself and don't worry about what other people say.

[@teresmajor6954]

I don't think it’s necessary to tell people you’re a virgin. I often change the topic when I’m asked, or I just play it off and let them think what they want. No need to act naive, trust me.

[@d.c.7533]

Loved adriennes story.

[@trisha896]

Adrienne Is so annoying just bc you’ve had sex doesn’t mean ur no longer innocent

[@paigez7680]

I saw a quote "virginity was made up by men because they thought their penises were so important that it changed a women" its really just comes down to what YOU make it mean! The first time doesn't have to mean anything or it could mean something. No right or wrong. For my first time, I was always told I was gonna cry and feel so different and all of this. And I didn't. I felt neutral. I didn't have a big change like its said in society. Sometimes sex is just sex. Its only women who face this more. That's wrong.

[@D2J8]

This convo makes me think of the song “Lesson Learned” by Alicia Keys & John Mayer

[@deer1843]

Damn Jeanie spoke the truth here! 💯😅

[@Dulce-cm2kx]

Those friends may be "raving" about losing their virginity now. Wait till they find out (IF THEY HAVEN'T YET) that now they have to live with STDs that could turn into cancer and/or leave you with infertility issues. Wait for that especial one. It's worth it!

[@phoebeallegra]

Why all these rules and limits on women? Are yall going to encourage the boys to wait and be under restriction too? And it doesn't make a young woman to a slut because she decides to be intimate and embrace her sexuality. Let us not go backwards and spread the shame of of young women making their own choices. If young women want to wait great, and if they decide not to wait and are ready to proceed in a responsible manner into the sexually active world then that is great too. Let's be fair and empowering and keep that same energy to young men.

[@DanetteSWhite]

LOL Love Loni. Yes, remember your first

[@gonzalezgonzalez9379]

If she is having those thoughts and feelings organically I say go for it, but don’t go for it just because you want to “keep up” with your friends. I was having sex before my friends were and even at a young age I always told them to NEVER do anything unless it was what they really wanted and were sure of. Sex isn’t a bad thing but it is something we should be careful with

[@Adriana-os2le]

I totally disagree with you, I don't know why yall put too much emphasis on virginity. Losing virginity is not a freaking milestone, its just sth to lose and start enjoying sex that's it. Just remember to be careful and be safe. You do not have to do it with someone special, and NOT probably you are not gonna even remember his name

[@jessicamazeya3626]

Adrienne will always comes with quotes or examples that we heard 1000 times already and finish her sentence with "does that make sens?"

[@helenmayberry6010]

Exactly...I am like 🤔 on some of the stories...

[@babe8917]

I am sorry but in the US there is no emphasis on waiting at all. If you are a virgin in college you are considered weird or prude. The whole college experience seems to be outlined into having as much as you can. And when you are older you cannot even tell anyone because you must be some freak. It is easier to be super promiscuous, because you are living your life, and having fun and exploring your sexuality and as a virgin you are repressed, conservative and don’t value intimacy. I don’t see any advantages in hook up culture. It is just using people for pleasure, resulting into situationships, single motherhood, diseases and people who cannot interact normally and have a healthy relationship. Why do you think dating is so screwed up nowadays?

[@alanastuart4446]

Baby girl listen having your dignity and pride as a young woman is special. Let the first person you decide to give the innocent too be a special individual.... because let me tell you I can still remember the first person I had sex with and it's been 4 years 2 months and days and I remember it like it was yesterday. So you see ik u don't want to regret it so be wise. Your friend dont have what you have and their no friends to you if there tell you that you have to loose you virginity. Take your time and be wise.

[@cornersworthcleaning8472]

Not enough emphasis!!!! Y'all it matters men and women I wish they were both patient I feel that's why so many people are doing so much sexually because they get started too early. Take your time you can never undue any sexual partner nor the energy or anything else they gave you be it baby disease good love heart break 💔 whatever you cant get it back

[@Jls79773]

Sadly it's the peer pressure is so real in high school.

[@kezzyangelic]

I do think we put too much pressure on virginity. Yes, I want to wait till I get married to lose mine. But I have lied and said I’ve lost it to get people to shut up or to be included in conversations when I was younger. Honestly, when you’re a virgin people laugh but if you’ve had more than 10 partners you’re labeled a hoe. Do men go through this? (I’m genuinely curious) because I personally believe that someone’s sexual journey is their business and they shouldn’t advance it or hold back and suppress it based on the opinions or to relate to others and they shouldn’t be judged for it. If you want to wait for someone special do it, if you personally think you’re ready and just want have sex then be safe and do you boo.

[@smeak9246]

I don't think there's too much emphasis on virginity and waiting. As a guy I will say that there isn't enough emphasis on virginity for guys. Quite the contrary. We're encouraged to sleep with whoever whenever however. I'm proudly an outlier of the male community being someone who is planning on waiting till marriage.

[@bcdmovement6856]

Yes curiosity is a mess

[@gg_kinz]

I guess I'm the only one who doesn't think it's a big deal. Get it over with if it's bothering you that much

[@8luvbug]

What Adrienne said.... 😐😶

[@hqbrazenexchange]

Sex happens everyday, don't be in a rush to do what others are doing especially when it's something you've not craved for before. And I get that you want to swap stories as well but that should not be a reason for you to become a lab rat just to get it over with and share your "grownup experience". Enjoy the stories, tease them, by the way, you only get to be a virgin once. When the time comes, you'll know. Goodluck!

[@bcdmovement6856]

Good point Adrienne

[@mariamejia4154]

Can we have a GenZ on this show to vary opinions?

[@poobkjm]

I wonder what Tamera and maybe even Tamar would have added to this convo.

[@helenmayberry6010]

It would have been a different conversation...isn't this girl in college? Tamera waited until she was in her twenties...(good for her),she could have really shared her journey, not sure about Tamar