Transactional Analysis Life Positions (The OK Corral)

In this video I explain the Transactional Analysis (TA) concept of life positions and The OK Corral. Eric Berne, the founder of TA suggests that as a young child you have already formed certain beliefs about yourself and others. The life positions were put in a quadrant by Franklin Ernst in 1971, Ernst called the quadrant the Ok Corral.
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🔵 CHAPTERS
0:00 Life positions and the OK Corral
0:44 I'm OK, you're OK
1:53 I'm not OK, you're OK
2:37 I'm OK, you're not OK
3:40 I'm not OK, you're not OK
4:48 Differences between Berne and Ernst
5:36 How to change your life position
🔵 I’M OKAY, YOU’RE OK
Joshua’s parents were attentive and loving. As a child Joshua has a fundamental sense that his parents were trustworthy, loving and supportive people. This enabled him to view himself as innately worthy, valuable and lovable hence Joshua’s life position of ‘’m okay, you’re okay. As an adult Joshua extended this view to others by an attitude of openness, honesty and trust. If you occupy the I’m ok, you’re ok life position you will be accepting of yourself and others. This life position is known as the healthy position.
🔵 I’M NOT OKAY AND YOU’RE OKAY
Charlie’s mother was a barrister and his father a surgeon. His parents worked hard but were emotionally unavailable. They pushed Charlie to achieve academically and they were frequently critical of his grades at school. In reality Charlie worked exceptionally hard at school and thought this would please his parents but it was never good enough in their eyes. Charlie never felt good enough. The I’m not okay, you’re okay position is know as the depressive or one down position. It is characterised by feeling powerless and feeling inferior in comparison with others.
🔵 I’M OKAY, YOUR NOT OKAY
Juliet, the 25 year old daughter of a wealthy restaurateur adopts the life position I’m ok, you’re not ok. Juliet is working her way up in her mothers business with the view of eventually taking over the chain of restaurants. Juliet feels superior and is critical of others, she projects her disdain onto anyone she perceived as inferior. This position requires that there be someone to be ‘less than’ in order to maintain the sense that you are ok.
🔵 I’M NOT OK, YOU’RE NOT OK
Sean's father has mental health issues and although he stayed at home all day he was emotionally unavailable. Seans mum worked hard to provide for the family but was either at work, doing the house work or too tired to engage. Sean was bullied at school and never found the opportunity to tell his parents. He felt alone in the world with no love or support from anyone. At only ten years old Sean started to self-harm as a way of expressing his deep inner pain. As teenager Sean first girlfriend cheated on him which served to reinforced his life position I’m not ok and you’re not ok. This life position is known is known as the position of hopelessness and frustration.
🔵 DIFFERENCES BETWEEN BERNE AND ERNST
There are slight differences between Berne and Ernst and their conceptualisation of life positions. Berne described your life position as a total life direction, fairly fixed and not easy to change. Ernst believes we can shift between positions for example, you might operate from the I’m ok and you’re not ok position at home and shift to the I’m not ok and your not ok position when talking to your manager. You may then shift to the I’m ok and you’re ok position when talking to your best friend.
🔵 ABOUT TERESA LEWIS
Teresa Lewis is the founder and Director of Lewis Psychology and a Senior Accredited psychotherapist with the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (MBACP Snr. Accred). Qualified in 1995, Teresa has been providing counselling and psychotherapy treatment for nearly 30 years. Teresa holds a masters degree in counselling and psychotherapy and is a qualified EMDR Practitioner having completed training accredited with EMDR Europe. Teresa is also a qualified adult educator and an accredited Mindfulness teacher As a recognised expert in her field Teresa is frequently asked to conduct editorial reviews and endorse counselling and psychotherapy books for international publishing houses.
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#LewisPsychology

[@LewisPsychology]

🔵What is your life position? I'd love to hear from you.

[@abeerhadrami5682]

I am OK, You are OK. but in some depressed situations I become I am not OK you are OK!

[@LewisPsychology]

@@abeerhadrami5682 thank you for sharing. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@SamanthaJayne75]

I'm not ok, youre ok. There are many things i do not like about my self and this stems from my life story, I currently in the final year of my degree, doing an assignment on T.A & PCT comparisons and I am beginning to understand why i think and feel the way i do and to see if i can change my life position and life story. I also suffer with depression and Congenital Hypothyroidism so i feel like I am trying to fight a battle i will only lose.

[@JELamp13]

I'm OK, you are nucking futz. I live in America, what can I say =-)

[@sreejeshr5188]

Actively, doing transactions to I'm Ok, you're Okay, Feel good and self satisfying, when I'm not more conscious about what actually going on in present! Nice!

[@emekdenizdemirci]

Great start to Saturday morning. Thanks for the video Teresa.

[@LewisPsychology]

Thanks for your support EMEK. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@Pangie77]

Thank you so much. That was extremely helpful and useful.

[@LewisPsychology]

That's great to hear Pangie. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@patsagu]

Thank you for this material, Very clear.

[@LewisPsychology]

That’s great to hear, thank you. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@mares3841]

Be HEALTHY ✨❣️🔆

[@palmyrikalex9281]

Thanks for explanation, it helped a lot

[@LewisPsychology]

That's great to hear. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@sabrinaszabo9355]

This is the best thing I’ve ever seen, quality and top notch material that should be taught in schools. As Shakespeare said we all wear masks over consciousness, gaining insight helps to shed them and establish an authentic and empathetic society

[@LewisPsychology]

Thank you for your kind words of support. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@DirkWaive]

Thankyou. Well expressed 🙏

[@LewisPsychology]

Thank you. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@abeerhadrami5682]

Thank you very much, that was really helpful.

[@LewisPsychology]

I’m pleased to hear it was helpful. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@Star-dj1kw]

❤ excellent explanation

[@LewisPsychology]

Thank you.

[@Anurag_Saxena]

My female boss was in "I'm okay, you are not okay" postion. Whereas I was in "I'm not okay, you are okay" postion." It literally frustrated me seeing her okay totally ignoring my okay.

[@LewisPsychology]

Thanks for your comment. Being on the receiving end of someone’s ‘I’m OK, you’re not OK’ is always unpleasant. The only thing we can do it try to work on changing our own life position to ‘I’m OK, you’re OK’. Wishing you well, Teresa.

[@Anurag_Saxena]

Yes, you videos are helping me attain my "I'm getting okay, you (my boss) were already okay position".

[@missfeliss3628]

the opposite of love is not always hate or abuse.... many times its disinterest or indifference

[@LewisPsychology]

That is indeed correct. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@sabrinaszabo9355]

10 out of 10

[@eternalreality4346]

❤❤❤❤

[@Tnc874]

Wow 🤯

[@SamanthaJayne75]

Hi Teresa, What is the name of the Franlin Ernst book/Journal please. I am doing an assignment for my degree and I am interested in reading about Franklin. Many Thanks , your videos are brilliant as they help me understand theory better and understand my own life position better.

[@LewisPsychology]

Dr. Ernst wrote several articles, monographs, and books including "The Handbook of Listening, Transactional Analysis of the Listening Activity," "The Game Diagram," "The OK Corral: Grid for What’s Happening," and and much more. Wishing you all the best with your assignment. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@michaelkonomos]

How do these interact with personality types? I have two children with very different outlooks that seem more based on their personalities and less to do with environment or choices.

[@LewisPsychology]

We all have a life position but it sounds like you may be talking about temperament. I plan to make a video on temperament soon. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@johnmathew5908]

❤

[@43292]

Mam can you please explain more about games with examples

[@LewisPsychology]

I will make a video about games. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@dsfkfjdg7660]

Is ok-ness the same as attachment theory?

[@LewisPsychology]

It has a lot of similarities and is certainly influenced by attachment theory but it's not the same. Best wishes, Teresa.

[@ninniejaxx5997]

This is the same framework as attachment theory, no?

[@LewisPsychology]

Yes it is. Best wishes, Teresa