Trauma and Physical Touch

[@violetflowersingrey]

This is so true. I completely avoid touching people in any way, it's so disturbing to me when people get too close. I get annoyed when people insist on touching me, I don't even like shaking hands with anyone, especially with males. Sexual trauma is a big thing.

[@Fiawordweaver]

My trauma from inappropriate sexual interaction from my father got buried due to my mother normalizing it as if I was insignificant. I’m 72. In 2018, I had brain surgery. A craniotomy ( benign tumor removal that had grown to a point to create seizures) post surgery PTSD set in and memories started to bombard my brain. I don’t sleep with my husband anymore. I fast forward scenes in movies with any intimacy including kissing. Thank you for this topic that helps me understand what I’m going through.

[@Emolovesblack28451]

I highly highly recommend EMDR. The memories still exist but the fire alarms aren’t going off the same way. I can do a lot of stuff I couldn’t do.

[@incensejunkie7516]

Pets are comforting. When younger, I used to be an equestrian and never realized how regulating horses were. There is an extreme amount of touch, whether it be grooming, petting/praising or even riding. You're in contact with the horse all the time you're riding. It's a relationship that must be built - no other relationship with an animal (other than an exotic perhaps) where you can easily be killed by this large creature, and yet you must trust each other. It's a healing quality, to know your horse trusts you as much as you trust it. I see there is equine therapy now, I don't know what it entails. I've also seen some prisons in the US who utilize horses and many of the prisoners state that is the first time they've ever trusted anyone or anything. It's more of a program to "socialize" captured mustangs with humans, and I believe they are eventually sold. I watched a documentary a few years about it and it changed many lives. I also used to have parrots and they would preen me, or one in particular would crawl on me, and go to sleep cuddled in my neck every night while I was on the couch reading (pre-internet). I imagine dogs and cats are very healing as well.

[@seasonsstarsstudios]

When I don’t have my dog around I start getting erratic and emotionally unstable.

[@lorimiller4301]

Horse With No Name ❤

[@louisehogg8472]

Agree about horses. I was rubbish at horse riding, but enjoyed it when not terrified. They are such gentle animals, and as vegetarians don't regard us as dinner. Because they're not fed from human meals, they also rarely grudge us every mouthful of our food. Those things make them less threatening. And riding them, they feel every bit of tension from us, and we feel reactions from them. It makes us more self aware of our emotions. And as James Hogg said: "a man's life may depend on his horse". I daresay it may be similar with other ridden animals such as camels, reindeer or Indian elephants. What I found hard, was having the confidence and strong boundaries that are needed, to show leadership to a horse and maintain safety. But those who DID succeed at those, acquired a genuine self confidence without arrogance. It gave them emotional maturity I think.

[@louisehogg8472]

Dogs are notoriously good at sensing and responding to emotions. Very empathetic. Cats can be, but much more independent.

[@auntbeth6794]

​@@louisehogg8472 Beautifully said and exactly why children would benefit from exposure to horses if possible. The Black Stallion project does a wonderful outreach where they give groups of children books from the Walter Farley series and provide up close contact with the lovely horses.

[@rubyg8749]

My two sons are the only ones who can enter my boundaries and give me a bear hug. In thier space I'm safe - everyone else please back off and let me love you from a distance. It is what it is 😔

[@juliepietruszka5089]

Same! Only person I want a hug from is my son

[@allisona9490]

😂

[@lilyshuminas7727]

Amen! Just my two adult daughters can come into my home

[@manicmode]

Straight up! I hate to be touched. I’d rather be dead!

[@Metalkatt]

This is what air hugs are for. *nod*

[@auntkathy9141]

So true. My 1st husband was abusive and would slap or hit my face. Divorced him. Remarried a few years later. Whenever my 2nd husband would try to stroke my cheeks in affection, I flinched and pulled away. It took a couple of years to overcome this.

[@SuzannaLiessa]

I realized quite some time back that light casual touch from people I cared for - a touch on the shoulder as they went past & similar - didn't feel good. It didn’t feel bad; just very mildly unpleasant. Firmer touch, like a massage, felt fine, but not necessarily the pleasure i remember. Things that used to be enjoyable, like fluffy blankets, were neutral. When I started doing body scans, I realized that the left and right sides of my body felt different. Left is "noisy," right is "quiet." Various kinds of imaging showed nothing. I also realized that the two sides felt separated, as though there was a blank line between them. I was doing some somatic work with my therapist around my mouth (there are a lot of things my body is afraid of saying, or showing on my face) and the subject came up. We spent the better part of the session working on one small segment of that blank line. Towards the end, when I'd actually managed to bridge the gap and the connection started feeling really solid, i just started laughing. 5 minutes, non-stop, and it felt _amazing_. When I finally stopped, I stretched out my right arm, like I'd been carrying something heavy and had put it down. Moved it around, rotated my wrist, wiggled my fingers like I was getting reacquainted with them. Maybe I was. Since then, I've realized that while I feel pressure, I often dont get sensation. I can feel the pressure that tells me something is rough or smooth, but not the actual sensation of rough or smooth, if that makes any sense. Now that I'm doing somatic work, I'm getting moments of actual sensation, which is nice, but extremely distracting. 🤣 I realized I've been very blind to scent, as well. Also nice, also distracting! It's as though my body numbed sensation along with emotion.

[@laurentolbert7]

Have u ever looked in to chakra cleansing? Clearing the blocks in the energy centers of the body? (Aka ur “blank line”) I m up to the third one (I think) solar plexus where empowerment and some of this sa stuff blocking Anyways just a suggestion if u have any more issues that is ! But ty for sharing and good luck it ur healing journey!🎉❤❤

[@SuzannaLiessa]

@laurentolbert7 Since doing somatic work with this therapist is my very first work directly addressing the physical, I'm just sort of feeling my way around. I'm working on becoming more aware of my body and where I feel my emotions, as well as connecting with my poor, terrified inner child. The suggestion is a good one, and I'll keep it in mind. Thanks!

[@four1629]

i cant imagine how distracting it is to have to become used to those sensations again, ha! i hope it goes well for you though ❤

[@jamiethornton8091]

I am so glad to see a video relating to the topic! I still struggle with physical touch and it varies from day to day but I have found that my touch boundaries soften when I feel safe and have a level of familiarity with the person. I vocalize my boundaries and I let people know that I don’t know them well enough and I request that they ask to hug or touch me and wait for my answer. Some people get it and the ones who don’t I am unapologetic about that boundary. It does get easier and I agree that the tone of the conversation and meetings can have an effect on the my openness to being touched. Thank you for this content.

[@jennw6809]

It's no coincidence that even before I understood I was traumatized, my calling ended up being massage therapy. I specialize in gentle (yet super effective), detraumatizing techniques. Interesting how much more change I can create working with the body, rather than elbowing it, trying to force muscles to relax. Imagine that ❤

[@suzijorgensen6545]

My ex husband was a self entitled narcissistic ticking time bomb. He was unpredictable and demanding. He would be cruel toward me and my children, then when we were in bed, he would slide his hand over me, and I would have a reaction that made me feel sick. Sometimes he'd kick me out of the bed. 12 years on, the on thing I miss is just companionship. Just being held without expectation.

[@caroleminke6116]

Me ❤️‍🩹 2

[@truffaut650truffaut6]

Yes❤

[@doreenplischke2169]

I relate very well. I literally developed PTSD from the constant sex demand. When every single touch is sexually intended, when anything involving intimacy MUST lead to sexual activity then one feels utterly used. I am still working on processing years of the life you describe as well and love my serenity and freedom now. I left him 10 years ago and still am impacted. It is no joke.

[@universaltruth2025]

@@doreenplischke2169That is what my husband was like. Every touch or night out together or even positive emotional interaction had to lead to sex that night. If it didn't he would get angry, sulk, do the silent treatment etc like an angry child the next day. It made me not want any touch whatsoever. It has totally ruined my sleep cycle and ability to stay asleep through the night. We're still together but really separated and I do have ptsd from it. I cannot really relax around him.

[@flipphone4755]

My husband did this for most of our marriage. We’re headed for divorce now and I separated our beds several months ago. (It’s a split king bed) Haven’t sleep this good in about 15 years. Sucks we still have to still be in the same bedroom, though.

[@AllisterMichannetheCat-tx9kn]

Most people in my life believe I think I'm entitled to safe space and a quiet, slow life. Thank you for your talk. It's important that people stop denying abuse and the very real effects it leaves. People don't need to walk on eggshells for those of us who cannot handle touch yet want healthy relationships, and even healthy touch.

[@BindingTheYoke]

For the longest time when I began to face my trauma I didn't want anyone to touch me. It took years and a car accident to let me allow people put their hands on me. Physical therapy, massage therapy and chiropractic. It actually ended up being helpful that I became comfortable with having a man's hand on my body without freaking out interiorly.

[@gailolson8255]

Very helpful and on-target with trauma survivors and touch.

[@TrevaTerrell]

This is my 1st time watching you. I want to thank you for talking about physical touch. I have found something that works for me and it may help other people.That is hugging a stuffed 🐶🐇🐻

[@michellefaith900]

Betrayal trauma and physical touch are a big deal as well! This video correlates well with the kind of trauma I am currently healing from. Thank you

[@mindkindmom]

In my sick family hugging and kissing were common, they all carried the Judas DNA. Kiss and betray. I now hate being hugged or kissed, it's triggering.

[@n.n9035]

How are you healing yourself

[@michellefaith900]

@@n.n9035 Currently psychotherapy, EMDR therapy, processing my emotions by dealing with them and not running around from them, spiritual practices…. I'd like to start working out, singing again, studying for my near future career, etc! All of those are methods of healing for me.

[@michellefaith900]

@@n.n9035 Currently, I've been healing myself through psychotherapy, creating healthy boundaries, EMDR therapy, processing my emotions by sitting in them allowing them to pass and not suppressing them or running away from them, & spiritual practices. However, I’d like to start working out more, start back singing again, and study for my near future career.

[@michellefaith900]

@@n.n9035 Currently, I've been healing using Psychotherapy, and EMDR therapy, processing my emotions by sitting in them and letting them pass instead of suppressing them or running away from them, and creating healthy boundaries and spiritual practices.

[@fionabryant7923]

Thanks, you are very clear and simple, and you have a soothing voice. Blessings

[@PhoenixTraumaCenter]

Thank you!!

[@elizabethbarefoot1111]

Beaten since birth. Do not hit your kids! Argue all you want. You are harming them for life if you do. I should have left my abusive marriage the moment it started. But I waited 14 years. I was used to those who love you physically hurting you. It’s not normal and it’s not ok.

[@donnadallariva8377]

🙏❤️

[@cynthiashelton826]

Thank you for speaking with compassion about trauma. Very easy to follow and understand.

[@GoBatman98]

I've always cringed at even a friends touch (glad handshakes are history, a fist bump is ok). It's hard for even my doctor of 30 years to do anymore than listen with a stethoscope. Trauma from dad beating me at 4 and 5 years old, I suppose. Single life, no girlfriends, and furry dogs suits me just fine. And forget crowds!!!

[@Akirapac]

Thank you Doctor Giacomucci. I enjoy learning from the videos you produce.

[@PhoenixTraumaCenter]

Glad you like them!

[@josephsager9425]

I was surprised when you mentioned not having a firm memory of your trauma. I don't remember any trauma that might've made me the way I am.

[@Nembula]

Me either. But the medical record says traumatic hymen injury in a nine year old.

[@sunrisesahar]

Mush platonic cuddle parties which also engage in consent exercises have been so helpful I honestly still cry everytime I go in relief.

[@1okanaganguy]

4:28 You just popped my balloon, Doc. Your best video yet. Thanks

[@PhoenixTraumaCenter]

Happy it was helpful!

[@GiftsAmimalsGiveUs]

Even saying the word physical touch makes me feel like I ate something nasty, and my body goes into flight mold. I don't like people touching me even my nephew when he was a baby. It was hard just changing him and putting on lotion. Now that he is older, he knows to ask me but it's good since he has a sensory disorder so we both know when to ask and when to let go. Animals are fine I never have any issues it's just humans need to stay far away.

[@seasonsstarsstudios]

I feel that. I was beaten a lot as a kid and now I can’t stand other people touching me. How do I know the human is safe? How do I know they won’t hurt me? I don’t. At least animals are predictable.

[@pleasesayhi4009]

Personally I'm a big fan of chiropractic, especially being a sensory seeker with a thing for deep pressure. You learn to trust and also advocate for yourself, to tell people "don't touch me like that, you have to be more gentle" and then have that respected. It's lovely.

[@PhoenixTraumaCenter]

I completely agree!

[@LaurenInsta]

Yeah male massage therapist has been really helpful for me. Especially if their trauma informed.

[@markrobinowitz8473]

Massage is MUCH safer than chiropractic (which has some "problematic" philosophies, too). A search for "chiropractic paralysis" will find lots of case studies where people suffered permanent harm.

[@Riverpuppies]

Loved when people were not trying to hug me in church because of Covid. Thanks for sharing , good to know a good reason for my being repelled by hugs. I even get uncomfortable if someone stands to close

[@TranscendingTrauma]

You are right really no one is talking about this. Thank you for speaking about it. I miss physical touch and i sometimes go for a massage and I almost always cry afterwards. Not necessarily in a bad way. A release but also a longing activated/acknowledged that is mostly suppressed and packed away.

[@AwakenLoveFreeYourself]

🙏🏻 for covering the topic 💗🫂💗

[@louisehogg8472]

Very common for women to be averse to any physical sexual contact as a result - since 1/3 have been abused and almost all others have had some physical sexual harassment. So why do so many men act impatient with this?

[@savedbyGrace1234]

I tense up . Become a stone . I was physically abused thru childhood. And then all thru adult hood . I freeze. Even if someone puts their hand on my shoulder I tense up . Freeze . Sometimes start to hyperventilate

[@louisehogg8472]

Practice, when calm, imagining someone doing this, and you politely asking them to remove their hand and not touch you without permission. Practice until you're confident enough to actually do so. Take appropriate action to ensure your boundaries are respected, every time they don't. By taking back your power like this, so you're in control of interactions, you'll then be in a position to choose to move that boundary slightly, with one or more individuals that have responded positively. You're under no obligation to let folk retraumatise you.

[@savedbyGrace1234]

@ thank you !!! I’ll try that

[@_Chessa_]

Physical assault many times in my infant years and preschool and elementary school. And then CSA around the time frame I turned 8.. Panic attacks every night afterwards. And physical touch has always made me uncomfortable and jump into action or freeze up in either feeling shame or feeling anger at myself. Like immense anger at myself. And now I seek it only through my partner. He’s the only one who can touch me. But I still jump. My whole body still jumps and I feel my heart rate spike and I feel Adrenalin go through me.

[@louisehogg8472]

I know women, whose experience was mild harassment, who have refused all touch for 40+ years. While conversely, I'm one of those who is single and struggles with the almost total lack of physical touch in our society and in my life. Especially the absence of frequent, regular, genuine hugs.

[@terriisme7888]

What is "mild harassment" and who are you to speak on someone else's trauma and how to handle it?

[@louisehogg8472]

@terriisme7888 what I meant, is that someone doesn't have to have been raped, for them to be severely affected for a long time or even the rest of their life. But ALSO, that for society to respond by practically outlawing physical contact between people socially, simply replaces the problem of unwelcome physical touch, with the problem of LACK of physical touch. Basically, that you can't generalise with a one size fits all rule.

[@juliepietruszka5089]

This was very helpful. Thank you

[@PhoenixTraumaCenter]

Glad it was helpful!

[@hmmcinerney]

Yoga most definitely. I went through a severe bout of anxiety last year for multiple reasons. I’d done yoga years before and started it again. It eventually brought me back to myself. I recommend Sarah Beth Yoga, free on YT. Forget the Lycra skinny bodies doing impossible poses, this is about getting the tension from your body and a little time of self love. Many videos are short and easy, like the legs up the wall one😊 reply if you want a link ❤

[@SherylLMoon]

Thank you for this. It was very informative.

[@solyluna3345]

Sexual violence say the words As a child or adult it’s sexual Abuse violence you can’t or didn’t consent to

[@kat-75]

sometimes, it's just physical violence.

[@scottfw7169]

It can be very context dependent, yep, yes, and, absolutely.

[@opey956]

Subscribed! PS… all the camera tricks and angles are distracting. The front facing camera feels more personable and accessible. Glad I stumbled on your channel! Great message!

[@wiebkeb9174]

When I am emotionally disregulated my body is very sensitive to touch (e.g. hand on a shoulder), very physically hypervigilant. Very much in the trauma zone. Makes sense ones you understand how the brain and the body work. I train myself to stop being angry at people who don't get I and take it personally. Everybody can educate themselves on complex Trauma these days instead of reacting offended or defensive.

[@LesleyGarvs-vo7eq]

I totally agree...I became a sex worker...because victims of childhood sexual abuse can not really relate safely without feeling vulnerable...on the other hand i have been reenacting and hiding past wounds...only because my ptsd became so complex is as a last resource that i mentioned my childhood sexual abuse...and inmediately got validated...something in me felt right...then i felt terrified( frozen emotion I couldn t feel in my childhood with my abusor), and now my panic attacks are less severe...i was lucky that at my 53 years old the german laws didn t take it as a joke my problems...which gave me more power not to feel ashamed to be a prostitute...and rather understanding the victim part of the ecuation. A lot of people think that escort girls are super star...and they are not...they were molested children who like me didn t find the right moment or the right people to talk about this. I am in a town where i feel respected and wow makes a big difference. Also as girlfriend i had problems ...so i would be with a partner who absolutely is nonsexual or a total abusor...now that i feel better...wow...i am feeling very different

[@auntbeth6794]

Anyone else secretly relieved at the increased distances and redution of hugging since Covid? Don't take this the wrong way, but it feels like a faint silver lining in that horrid dark and deadly cloud.

[@InnerLantern7]

Thank you for this important information.

[@ArtemisandOllie]

Thank you ❤

[@angelm6497]

I had a manager that used to blow his breath down my arm. I asked him to stop because I was uncomfortable with it. My contract was cancelled. He laughed after he did it.

[@nildaluzrodriguez]

If someone doesn't like touch that is OK. It may not be about trauma, it could simply be them setting boundaries or there's a decay in the relationship and the person is not interested in their partners touch? If someone/s is struggling with touch of trauma, then I hope they can recover from those events and heal to have healthy and respectful relationships where they can feel SAFE to be touched and give touch. ❤

[@jennifercatherinekarel8925]

Helpful video, ThankYou

[@KatieACampbell]

🙃Thank you for mentioning Yoga as a healing modality. Yoga can be a Self-care practice which can be likened to an inner massage. Tai Touch or Therapy occurs with clothes on while a professional facilitates consentual touch during a sequence or series of supine poses (asana). Yogatherapists (IAYT) do (k)not provide touch unless they should🧘‍♀️

[@GodLovesYou1980]

Thank you

[@dionepatrick800]

This resonates with me but I never think I could ever get to a point where i feel confident with being touched again?

[@dimimegesis]

physical touch is still really a struggle for me. it is bad. it's hard for me to think of a truly good time. it makes me sad.

[@jansoyster1303]

I have been in psychoanalytic therapy for about three years. Very early on, I noticed a need that I have for physical closeness, but my therapist even refused to let us have our chairs 6 inches closer together. He refuses to have any kind of touch, which he says is because of my possible sexual abuse history. I feel that I cannot completely heal without some physical touch because it represents acceptance. Lack of touch represents rejection to me. I think that he is the one with some kind of history or past experiences that he is not able to let himself relax on this topic. I trust him to not go over the boundaries, but I think that he doesn't have the self-introspection to know that he is the person who is slowing our work down. What if the therapist is the person who has the hang-ups regarding non-sexual touch? I know that I could change therapists but that would mean giving up the relationship that we have worked so hard on.

[@lorimiller4301]

I think that's very possible. Many people get into psychology because they have issues of their own. He's got to be in deep denial. You will have to trust your gut on what to do. Very interesting. I hope the best for you, regardless of your choice. Happy New Year 🎉😊❤

[@anesidora3084]

I feel you are projecting yourself on him bit too much. Physical touch is very intimate thing and I don't really know why you ask it from therapist who also has their own personal boundaries regarding his clients. Also you said for you touch represents acceptance. For most people touch is important but it's not a tool for self validation. Or it shouldn't be. I know lot of people seek validation through sex. Maybe he realizes you have unhealthy approach towards touch and that's why doesn't want to reciprocate. And lastly, you are in psychoanalytic therapy. From what I remember it works for people who like to go through their issues with logic and problem solving. You might want to try some other type of therapy. I wouldn't be surprised if you chose this type of therapy unconsciously because it lets you be in a distance and makes you repeat problematic cycle with closeness and lack of it. The fact that you are more invested on analyzing him as person and his faults means the therapy is going in wrong way anyways

[@markharris5544]

@@anesidora3084 My trauma involves the felt sense of physical abandonment as an infant. For an infant touch is the basic communication of acceptance love and safety. If someone I feel close to avoids touching me I feel rejected. That's just a deep seated feeling its not a conscious tool. In other words its not in the realm or right or wrong.

[@anesidora3084]

@@markharris5544 absolutely. I was also neglected and haven't been able to be in relationship or have healthy connection with closeness and intimacy. It's a place of fear for me. Opposite reaction to the same issue. But you also need to realize that it's also exactly what you need to work on. It is concerning if for example your partner avoids touching you, I suppose it's a red flag. But in general seeking validation from other people, is not healthy to begin with. You will easily keep using the same thing to value whether you are worthy or not. If you get lucky and get a good patient caring partner then perhaps there is a chance to understand that touch is about connection and not validation of your existence. The difference is subtle but it's there for people who have trauma

[@flowerchasethesunshine9063]

I don't think the therapists' job is to be a comforter that way. Their job is to be a kind of detached but sympathetic guide in your process. Actual intimate comfort and connection is something you need to find outside of therapy in your real life.

[@KM-oj4jk]

Why is there physical touch in a psychotherapy group? I've never heard of such a thing

[@Kathy-vv9ir]

Could you give us key points to touch on in a personal statement when applying for a social work MA please?

[@carlorizzo827]

Dr Scott, thank you. Ahem, this is putting it mildly. Violent nuclear family, started at 10 months old, I know from photographs. I'm old, found some relief in modalities you mentioned. Overall I am crippled in physical intimacy, resigned fromdating. Too bad I still fall in love. But no go. Back in the 1980's I first heard the term "tactile defensive". Ever see the Hitchcock movie Marnie? She had it. The Polanski movie Repulsion? Brrrrr... Became an alcoholic/addict, pain so pervasive. In recovery now. Glad I'm old, miracle I did not succumb.

[@HerDaytona675]

I definitely detach, when receiving unexpected touch

[@cathybonner7888]

Hi from the UK. I've just found your channel and haven't listened to all of this particular show as yet. I've just completed 2yrs of trauma therapy and I can now see why, when some of my work colleagues hug me, sometimes I freeze others I'm OK. My late hubby was the only man I've ever made love with and it was beautiful every time. I miss him so much and I'm not sure if I'm ever going to get this kind of love again. Thank you

[@truffaut650truffaut6]

I cannot remember any trauma or incident. I still cannot enjoy too much physical closeness. Only my children can hug me shortly. Is this strange? I don't know.

[@MeganWilliams-v7n]

I don’t like physical touch because we didn’t have any when growing up. The last hug from a family member that i can remember was when I was about three.

[@MadameDegen]

I cant remember sexual abuse but I also have all the symptoms of an sa survivor.

[@vivvy_0]

It can also have something to do AD

[@Nembula]

I do not remember the assault but the medical record says traumatic hymen injury. Check your medical records. My trauma was in the early sixties. The Dr denied the assault, called it a bike accident and sent me home for a bath. So evidently I buried the memory but not the reaction to it.

[@susanmercurio1060]

Wow, what a cool name, Dr Giacomucci!

[@louisehogg8472]

Made from avocados?

[@Karal-lg3nx]

Oh, you gave me some insight into a lot of my past life. You made what I was kind of thinking make sense. And some helpful tips on managing the stress of past trauma… Thanks

[@ANNASTESIA-s4o]

That's me, i wont let anybody touch me.

[@seasonsstarsstudios]

I become sick to my stomach if someone adult hugs or touches me, especially if I can’t see the perpetrators. I either hug children when they want or I have to initiate the contact.

[@Demeter1966Star]

I flinch big time and even have gotten in fights and went to jail just because of unwanted touch. It's been rough. I also am a very petite women so it's not good for me being so small. Got out of prison in 2017. Doing the work on my coping skills.😉

[@georgesinger8836]

As a husband of 15yrs, 2 children. How do i help my wife deal with chuldhood and first husband trama that recently surfaced? She is being counciled through and im trying to be understanding and supportive, but would t you know it, my love language is physical touch, and hers is acts of service. I want to be the knight in shinning armor here, but i also am going through emotions and feelings as shes healing. This is very difficult for me, as i typically am either all in on her beauty, eyes, curves,hair shes a 10 in my eyes and its hard to not touch her. I dont want to be a jerk and go cold turkey, but its the only way i know to train myself to back off. Thanks for the video. Loving husband wanting answers

[@scatterlienatalie9873]

I dont remember my childhood but I know that i cannot stand light physical touch. My body jumps and kicks. Its not just ticklish, I hate it. I have only recieved light touch from men. But I only like firm pressure. I dont know what this is, but maybe it's the same for others?

[@john3088]

I'm traumatized just by watching this. What's with the jumpy nature of the camera view & constant editing?

[@NovemberMe5213]

If it's about trying to create energy and momentum or increase the impact of the words, trying to give more power to the content. That's needs to be in the delivery. I agree it's not a strategy that fits this content.

[@megan.caroline923]

😂

[@maydavies888]

I am so sorry this traumatized you. It also hurt my sensory input. In order to glean the information, I had to put the phone down, simply listen to the content, and not look at the screen at all.

[@christinahall9258]

💀🤣

[@seasonsstarsstudios]

Very funny. Using the word “traumatized” as a hyperbole for unsettling. Grow up.

[@Cherry_Heartz]

My husband hit me while pregnant with his third, because I was hurting my own self he hit me in the face. I've never liked him since and fake any enjoyment in our life.

[@soulfulexpansions]

My legs subconsciously try to protect me in bed. That wont work if the damage is subconsious. Dont know what to do.

[@alexandrugheorghe5610]

Narm psychotherapy is also good

[@happydragon4061]

Even mental abuse affects the tolerance of physical touch. Why do we have to hug everybody upon meeting them?

[@laurentolbert7]

So from my pov I’m the ladder one u described as a reaction as far as I seek it out but at same time can never reach 🤯 Almost like separate from my body lol Been faking forever and I’m 36 (also think this prob avenue nobody talks about) dunno if anybody else relates but they say most personal is most universal so here ya go ! Smh lol (uncomfortable hehes)😊

[@ANNASTESIA-s4o]

That's me

[@potatochalbro]

All this is horrible :(. I had no issues with sex before and now I'm broken due to someone else. I don't want a damn yoga :/

[@louisehogg8472]

Yes, it's horrible that in a world of 4,000,000,000 people, injured and damaged people are offered an exercise, a drug, or a therapy animal, at best. We need millions more close, platonic friendships of all sorts. And millions of people committed to a romantic relationship but eager to reach that fulfillment via patient, sensitive, honest interaction, not grabbing at sex like spoilt brats grab food at a birthday party.

[@badmusic793]

broken isnt broken forever. Ive been broken many times before but we always have the chance to heal and come back again. there are people out there who can help you heal, all we can do is try and surround ourselves with people who build us up. we'll make mistakes but we can always try again

[@PinkToe6]

Is this why after I have sex with my husband I get anxiety and can’t sleep? I never correlated it with past trauma

[@TeamPlanlos]

The jump cuts are traumatizing.

[@amunannarawr]

What if im traumatized by the part of the collective who participated in the covid vaxxine regime ?

[@lilyshuminas7727]

I did not get the Covid vaccine, but I did get the Covid virus. As uncomfortable as it was, I would rather have the virus than the vaccine; yet I’ve been shamed by people who got the vaccine who told me I’m putting them at risk. This makes me angry. Now they’re finding out that the Covid vaccine is not actually a vaccine at all!

[@Madamchief]

Exposure therapy! Get vaccinated. You'll feel better 👍

[@19MadMatt72]

I know it may seem risky behavior. I have seen a sexual therapist. Although many have a different name for that career. There does need to be a legal outlet for some individuals.

[@heartstrings4961]

Sexual abuse I believe didn’t affect me like that. I have more women trying to touch me and as a woman I don’t like that. I am a straight woman and don’t appreciate it. Men don’t touch me other than my husband and or past relationships.

[@lilyshuminas7727]

Many people have dark spirits on them, especially today. I have experienced women being attracted to my empathy, trying to get bothered by me, though I’m their age. Yuck I really cringe at this.

[@BethDiane]

Folk dancing. It's touch that's regulated.

[@nicklittle8399]

I love the content here, but I have to comment on the camera angle swaps. You gotta do less of them. They are incredibly distracting.

[@50toinfinityatleast]

Never saw any of this guys videos before. I wonder if he’s just trying something new or if it’s a pattern. But I agree it is distracting. Sometimes my videos I’ve noticed not the camera angles, but editing is a little rough to be fair posting on KZbin my October 13. So I’m still really learning all the different techniques, etc. But your right is distracting--attitude to say I would check another one of his videos and it’s the same kind of style. So I don’t think that’s probably for me but I know there’s a lot of people that enjoy it because he has 11,000 subscribers and the material is good by itself.

[@bygrace2me]

Agree--I had to scroll down so I couldn't see the video anymore while I listened. It was jarring. The content itself is good. But if you're making videos especially for sensitive people and traumatized people, this kind of jumping between camera angles is especially problematic.

[@Mcfreddo]

Can people get over it?

[@thehouseofoverthinking]

I love touch and I'm good at massage, but the only body I put my hands on is my cat. Men are so disappointing, I would rather keep my light under a bushel!

[@daniela1970-d3o]

Depending on God and His’ time lengths … praying before facing something/ someone demanding/strong personality/abuser if unavoidable…”God prepare my soul” type of prayer

[@JanisFroehlig]

This has a political angle....

[@pitchblackprogress1341]

Wait what? Why do you say that?

[@silviamacias6809]

Every human word or action has a "political" angle.

[@anne-mariewessels710]

What about touch is political, I don't understand....?

[@minooluna23]

I think people in western countries -despite all the openness promoted- have a taboo about sex so they keep saying: trauma caused by sexual touch. even in western movies, the climax of the movies is sex stuff. you can hardly find any movie that doesn't use sex to make some sweet attraction. so when you wanted to give examples, I was waiting for it to come up in your talk, which came. overall, I m fed up by so much sex is mentioned in trauma issues. .. I bet it is in less than 10 percent of trauma issues. most of it is caused by indifference, bullies, discrimination, inequalities .. I even watch eastern movies as they r significantly more humane.

[@louisehogg8472]

1/3 of women sexually abused, 1/6 men, and likely 100% of both sexually harassed. So while I agree there's a societal obsession with sex, it's a fair bit of the problem.

[@SamB502]

Thank you