Unconscious Developed INFP and INFJ Love? | CS Joseph Responds

[@00Klingon]

That's funny, this matches exactly my observations of an INFJ and INFP couple I know. The INFP female is much older than the INFJ male and their relationship is clearly all about trust, care and even an idolization that is incredibly sweet to watch in action (some may find it sappy). We went as a group with several couples to an outdoor event that required a lot of walking and the INFJ was very dutiful in holding doors for her, offering the coat off his back when it rained unexpectedly, stopping to ensure she has plenty of rest for her aging knees, and even calling the event quits together when she had had enough social interaction and needed to retire back to their vehicle.

[@christinadonnelly781]

😂 I have totally given my INFP partner my coat, my gloves, my food. Lol. All of that and the fact that he accepts it and likes that I do it makes me go squee inside. I think it's terrible cute. Honestly INFP forgets to take care of their body needs all the time. Maybe people think it's weird but social rules are not something we follow much!

[@aladdout9454]

​@@christinadonnelly781 h-he took a coat and gloves from a woman? don't mean to sound sexist but most men experiencing love are usually protective over their woman😅. Is there additional context to this?

[@preciousgoje2193]

@ Aladdout probably not. That alone will be a turn off for me.

[@christinadonnelly781]

@@aladdout9454 Not all love is material. Protection is not about stuff. I am Autistic i have thought out all possible scenarios for everything. Including my partner and his tendency to be not prepared for things. My partner protects my emotions and my nervous system needs for regulation. I dont need him for the other stuff. Mostly you sound tied to gender norms and gender rules. I dont know if thats sexist.

[@discoskull]

@@aladdout9454 People are different, including men. If both parties are happy with the dynamic, who are you to crap on it with your simplistic sexist take?

[@nodistractions5548]

Infp and infj are so powerful and useful together. I appreciate you sharing your knowledge

[@sirphil13]

Just like to offer some comfort to my INFJ brothers and sisters. Maturity is on a spectrum, with immature malignant narcissism at one bookend to mature, healthy adult at the other bookend. INFJs are late bloomers, the gauge on our maturity spectrum is constantly moving towards maturity, while a lot of people get stuck somewhere on the maturity spectrum (arrested development). Something magical happens when our gauge on the maturity spectrum passes a point where we quickly switch from having an "external locus of control" to owning an "internal locus of control"...when an INFJ stops seeking validations from others, and a peaceful harmony, self-confidence, advance observing ego, mastery of boundary function, everything one expects from owning a very high emotional intelligence accumulates. We are the natural counselor types, and the prerequisite for being a counselor type to others is owning a high EQ. I did feel some of these characteristic INFJ traits CS describes often about INFJs when I was a young padawan, but the day I stopped seeking validations from others and I am able to do that for myself now, I no longer put people on pedestals (because that doesn't jive with harmony where everyone is equal, everyone has their own strength and weaknesses, no one person is perfect, and life is about abundance not scarcity - mindset), I don't feel jealous (my mature masculine intelligence does protect what's in my territory, immature women thinks that's jealousy, but it's not. I am not seeking validations from immature women..I don't need a mommy to make me feel wanted) even in an open relationship (with believe it or not, an ENTP tomboy) - I don't feel other men are better than me, that often makes me a woman's favorite...as a mature INFJ I feel very unique and authentic. I think INFJs have a constant upward trajectory of developing our emotional IQ (one of the manifestation of INFJ's perfectionism is an inward journey, it's our lifelong passion of learning and evolving into being consistently our best selves) to eventually get our EQ leveled with our born very high IQ, a YIn Yang balance happens, and a peaceful harmony settles and coexist in our mind, that calmness/slight edgelord is what attracts others to us. I do notice CS often talking about INFJs that are still in their external locus of control stage, yet not giving credit that INFJs being "the counselor" types, we have an innate higher emotional intelligence that is higher than the other personality types which a high EQ's mental dexterity is needed to help others with their emotional stresses and sticking points, that high EQ also allows INFJs with our own sticking points, on our own time - this is one of the reasons why INFJs are known to be highly self-reliant. Having a high EQ means we are less narcissistic, having an "old soul," is just a metaphor for having a "high maturity" level compared to the other types (I am not aware of other personality types being described as having an "old soul"), pettiness like jealousy and unworthiness, we outgrow it.

[@leeroy14r60]

No no, iam not reading this shit, iam too bored.

[@aladdout9454]

You in an open relationship? pal she doesn't love you

[@leeroy14r60]

@@aladdout9454 Am dating an Ai program, and she loves me.

[@harnoorkamboj8140]

Thanks!

[@e.keanzabaelhornies7344]

Is this schizophrenia shitpost

[@feramval]

I am an INFP and my only and best male friend is an INFJ and this is exactly how our friendship is working behind the scenes.

[@snakeyes1]

Hi. Your fave INFP here again. I love this video. Your mannerisms are really shining through. You look comfortable in your work environment. Look how far you’ve come!!! I’m so proud of you. ❤

[@CSJoseph]

Much appreciated. You sure you are not an ISFP?

[@aplethoraofme2056]

There are a plethora of relationships that end up in the gutter because of egotistical imbalance. While they can work on paper (it’s not always the case). It seriously takes work and effort to be in a successful relationship. Takes one Secure type attachment style person to actually make any relationship work. Even a secure type would get fed up and realize they deserve better. If they aren’t already trying their best, they will realize it’s not them with the issues and nor they are willing to keep putting up with the BS.

[@talonthorn]

Wow! I can so identify with this respect aspect as an INFJ who is interested in a certain INFP. It seems natural, second-hand to me to act as I do, but I didn't realize it is based on respect. I can extend this to how I relate with others. I project a need to be respected, which other people look down on, thus fulfilling my expectations of a person not showing me respect. Good stuff! I just recently realized an internal, "self-management" shift in my cognitive awareness. This has changed/is changing my life. That is something @sirphil13 mentioned in his comment here.

[@frankmcnally5993]

I typed Felix Kjellburg as an INFJ and Marzia Kjellburg as an INFP and this has provided me insight to their love compatibility and other INFP and INFJ couples on a deeper level. Thank you Chase.

[@peaklander1]

Was about to comment that, Chase typed them as INFJ and INFP too!

[@fireflieer2422]

interesting! I thought that he would be an extroverted type but this makes sense too

[@e.keanzabaelhornies7344]

​@@fireflieer2422most extroverted introvert for a reason lol.

[@rayanrafea5869]

Wow, that is really really a valuable answer. I can't thank you enough. I just realized from your answer that I was a UD INFP (woman) my entire life. I was always a top achiever in school and then at the university, I also did my master's studies all for people's validation (especially from my ESFP mother). Since then I hesitate to move forward for a PhD program. As I don't know any more the motivation behind my decisions, are they from a people-pleasing place or are they from a pure desire? That's the dilemma of my life right now, as I can't reach that point of alignment, that point of no return. Another point I want to make: is when you mentioned that the INFP needs the INFJ as a galvanizer in order to manifest their dreams into reality. That's also right for my libra sun and rising signs, they tell me that in order to succeed in life I have to learn to cooperate with other people. It's weird how all these things interconnect. Again, thank you.

[@rimasoosamir8167]

I was a top student too but not for people's validation but because i was neurotic and scared of failing, so I studied intensly before exams lol

[@JustAnotherINFJ]

I'm hoping my INFP sees this one

[@haihai5293]

This guy is something else, listen him infp's and infj's.

[@cacorn982]

I always come back to this , it's nice to hear these words of advice. I am currently failing in helping my husband lose weight... I give and give effort but I'm feeling like my relationship may be failing.

[@RoseyCreations]

Your lighting in this video is amazing. Cheers!

[@rimasoosamir8167]

How to know ur unconsious developed as an INFP

[@RaffertyMBTI]

Been a fan of yours for 2 years and somehow it always feels like I've discovered you just yesterday.

[@DizzyLuv0]

What about INFJs personal dreams? They also have dreams why should they give those away to help other people if they can't even help themselves

[@AnythingYasmeen]

Well its not hard for the infp dreams to become part of the infjs dream cause thier observing thier so experience I think. Especially if the infj is a women, not sure if it changes of the infj is a man

[@mysticwolf_223]

I'd say an INFJ would only really be interested in someone on a similar path anyway/ the dreams would be similar or enhanced? "Support/Tank/Healer" came to mind, found a thread about what roles INFJ like to play in multiplayer games and those 3 came up frequently. I've felt in the past too I can empower other peoples dreams but not my own so much. Or I empower my own through empowering their similar/complementary ones?

[@SarahJacksonLV]

This is exactly the advice I am needing.❤

[@giuseppelorisnuzzo2840]

GOD. YES. i was in this exact situation and she was treating me as she was treating the others god. i had to ask her "what is your pritiority in life? the person you wanna be with or friends? also is very disrespectfull to not say a clear "no" to another guy that is approaching you to (quote) "not hurt him too much" while you are with someone. LIKE WTF. Choose who to hurt more me or some random person. i guess fi critic does really not care about what or who to prioritize. Ofc i am not gonna invest and make a priority someone that Is not gonna put me in a position of priority aswell.

[@aladdout9454]

nono, we do prioritize. Maybe this is an unhealthy one? You make the right choice by not prioritising ppl who dont prioritize them, its a blow to Te inferior and they need to learn that. But infps are usually infjs favourites. The not saying no to other guy could be a Si inferior thing, chase said its their behaviour usually. Not saying you mistyped her, but saying that she may be unhealthy one.

[@giuseppelorisnuzzo2840]

@@aladdout9454 basically She Is Just Shadow focused, and yeah She invest in people that really care about her (Friends) but at the same time even among best Friends you should prioritize the Person you are with more i Guess.

[@elaine-thinks-thoughts]

Okay, but the quality of the video is so good? Thanks!

[@Sam-ng3of]

can you do a video on the silver pair for intjs and the benefactor pair for infjs please

[@dogdonut3]

I thought "normalcy bias" meant reacting to threat warnings with minimization. (The meme of the dog in the burning room saying "this is fine".) Or are you referring to a bias by infp women toward neurotypical males?

[@whathuh7135]

Love the content bruv it's helping me a lot so fkn glad I came across your vids. Peace🤙

[@bananabreaduwu8246]

But I have a question... idk if you'll be able to respond... but doesn't that make the INFJ in the relationship basically corrupted? And it feels to me like the INFJ is just a dog in the relationship and could be easily manipulated... It's like INFPs source of reason is "You have to be my dog and adore me because of this" seems abusive to me INFJs side of the relationship is basically being dragged by the INFP and the INFP allowing that behavior... and INFPs side of the relationship is "making MY dreams come true... oh yeah and including you because you're my dog ofc" You also mentioned how for INFJs is better to not let their shadow value what they feel and instead they should be more pragmatic with their ESTP subconscious and actually GROW... INFPs seem to inhibit that growth for INFJs and just justify why is it ok to be basically... WOTHLESS and a Doormat. What If the INFJ tries to be subconscious focused? Does INFPs Inhibit that... because If that's the case I'm running away from them... I'm trying to develop my subconscious, responsibility and happiness but INFPs relationship seem to allow INFJs to forget about themselves and their own importance and serve the INFP instead

[@preciousgoje2193]

Very much so. This is why I avoid INFP men.

[@havefun3470]

@@preciousgoje2193 Yeah i also feel the same way with infp men. That I'm there to serve them while they're not adding anything in my life. They just take and take and take

[@elvanmelikesutlu6110]

Watch felix and marzia kjelberg, doesnt seem to fit thag decsription! Marzia showed interest in felix before he became famous and she actually gave up her dream of studying in paris for him. So it‘s sth u should judge people on a personal level with and not type related

[@isabelledinneweth]

This was an interesting video .made some things clear from the past.thank you . I appriciate it .🙏

[@dandee6604]

So female infp and male infj is less ideal than a male infp and female infj duo?

[@AriaKlauser]

I remember I acted like this with an INTP person before (trying to help them accomplish their dreams and the idolatry thing) now I understand why it didn't work as I thought. xD

[@tierra3165]

How can we find out more about the 8 sexually compatible types for infps?

[@Sam-ng3of]

he says its anyone with ni-se

[@malakashraf2801]

Be a member , there are series about golden, natural and pedagogue and I suppose more . He keeps talking about the sexuality channel on the discord and how it's the most active .

[@ScaryMango6755]

There was a video on this channel about it, which are the types compatible with INFP

[@RunawayTV]

Can we get more ENTJ related videos so we understand them more?

[@honor9lite1337]

No need, they are rich anyway.

[@dovio832]

@@honor9lite1337 based arguement!

[@joewayne98]

Source of reason = Ti , INFJ Consumer of reason = Te , INFP

[@joewayne98]

Source of dreams = Ni, manifested into objective Se reality (Gandhi, Hitler) Consumer of dreams = Ne, for their Si amusement eg, knight in shining armour. Think Sansa Stark. Writing poems, pure melancholy for the sake

[@pinklasagna8328]

@@joewayne98 hitler was an entp. If he was Ni he probably would've been more successful.

[@Violet_Odorata]

How about Fi and Fe?

[@shinoyashino7995]

INFJ here thought that I was going to begin one but then Infp turns out to be emotionally unavailable and just want friends with benefits. We show so much respect for each other in the two dates. He want to have sex but not commitment. I cannot do that. I refused in a good manner. And im happy that I did not aggressively say anything bad to him. I know he was hurt like I was with my ex. And I don’t want him to think that every woman is going to do that on him. like trying to harness him knowing that he is feminine. I thought everything is going well. But anyway thanks universe for the lesson. I have explain to him that it do us no good with The maximum power of my FE parent. I have this Spirit cleanliness thing. And nowadays I tell people that I respect them more than others in front of their face I am less shy about it. And of course I will still be learning to express

[@aladdout9454]

that's nice but if he comes back saying he will do commitment, I still think people like this aren't trustworthy

[@cacorn982]

Great video, I love this relationship but I think both being ud turns into enablement/corruption. I'm not sure if it's fixable...after awhile.

[@sandradibiaso7316]

You blow my mind over how smart you are. My INTJ subconscious is impressed. I am a Donna Summer type ESFP. I love INFPs' knowledge of crystals and their extraverted intuitive parental guidance in expanding my knowledge of the possibilities that can come from having certain crystals like smoky quartz, rose quartz, amethyst, and other crystals that can help me to manifest my dreams into reality.

[@AnythingYasmeen]

Idk... me and my older brother are UDUF infj and infp and it was great to be included in his dreams at first until he tried to get me to do all the work that wasn't even of any value and lost me some money and kept giving me terrible advice. I consistently try to avoid infps, its intriguing in the beggening even as friends but every time I get to the point where I don't want to be used by them or have to put up with them. I guess that's nuture playing its part.

[@sharpiesarecool814]

Yes! Please never be afraid to say no to someone. Boundaries are so important in all aspects of life I realized!

[@paullynch2836]

How bad can an ISTP/ENFJ relationship get!?🤔

[@AnythingYasmeen]

Does this mean that an UD infj women will always end up showing respect through thier ideolization origin regardless of the type of relationship?

[@malakashraf2801]

I am confused , if ud infjs are close to justification origin thus corruption does that mean shadow doesn't equal maturity now ?

[@mahsa7526]

Is wentworth miller an infj?

[@stevemiller8895]

Allot of judgment and speculation there concerning the infp by all means don't use any subjective information , you can't base everything on theory. People have specific and subjective needs, and are on specific and subjective paths. Being an infp , I have three INFJs in my life and I don't like any of them , so the silver pair thing , is not a proven science, I'm skeptical at best. Even though the theory appears pretty sound, but in my case doesn't translate in practicality Thanks!

[@heatherhafer3333]

I appreciate your experience, fellow INFP! I, too, know some INFJs: 6 of them. While they can be interesting to talk to, I only found 1 of the 6 to garner my respect and admiration to the level that C.S. Joseph is describing. In turn, she respects and appreciates me. Our relationship is very mutual and based on genuine respect and validation. The thing is she won my regard and my heart over time as I realized that her soul is compatible to mine. C.S. Joseph is right about mutual respect, validation, and reasons for the INFJ to admire the INFP. I, in turn, appreciate her and offer my own type of admiration for the way she lives her life or for the way she is as a soul. I wouldn't admire her if she wasn't on the same plain as me. We match cognitively, morally, spiritually in our love for God and His revealed word, mentally, emotionally, intuitively, develpmentally, and conscience(ly).

[@MsKingwa]

This is so interesting...... What is it that determines if one is shadow, unconscious, ego, or super ego focused?

[@malakashraf2801]

A lot

[@HazLight4426]

Would this relationship work way better if one of them were SD?? Or would it just be a little different in the dynamics?

[@malakashraf2801]

No , based on the last episode the best for uduf is uduf or they compete

[@zahrazar9974]

@@malakashraf2801 they're not golden pair

[@malakashraf2801]

@@zahrazar9974 enfj and infj are close enough to apply to last episode , too . I could be wrong .

[@zahrazar9974]

@@malakashraf2801 well idk, i just refer to what i heard.

[@cacorn982]

I don't necessarily think this is true, maybe uduf with a sduf?

[@aladdout9454]

csj, I agree with ur opinion, but it comes across like forcing this infp to like someone she simply doesn't like. Plus, if shes that shallow and prone to assumption, let her miss out on this man and regret it later ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯. I like revenge/regret stories more than love stories :p

[@malakashraf2801]

You are really that cool college girl or maybe I am too boring but this is the first time I see this emoji

[@HazLight4426]

Why forcing? She probably did miss out on something good. So he is right. Sounds to me she "didn't like him" because she had dumb beliefs.

[@aladdout9454]

@@HazLight4426 thats her problem, her beliefs. It really sounds like a L take if your response to an acquaintance or a friend being rejected is being petty and generally talking bad ig? I couldn't find an accurate word instead of "forcing" i kinda have a limited english vocab😅

[@valdaniels4078]

@@aladdout9454 He didn't slander anyone, because he didn't accuse anyone falsely. He also didn't name the INFP in question, so no one is defamed.

[@aladdout9454]

@@valdaniels4078 yeah thats true. I meant like talking bad and harsh about someone for their rejection yk? I'll edit it tho...thanks

[@aura7153]

I have this small problem with INFJ which that I knew them online, I haven't met them in real life , I can definitely respect them and one of them is definitely way better than me , my problem with them they seem a little bit boring , it can be really peaceful with them But I was more excited with types like ESTP , ENTP , INTP But when it comes to INFJs I feel some boredom

[@aladdout9454]

I can't relate but ik one person called me boring once so maybe its a thing. Why don't you either introduce fun into both of your conversations...or stick to people who you find fun? usually i have noticed that either one of parties being fun makes the overall interaction fun too. Also we do have a tendency to mirror people we talk to.

[@aura7153]

@@aladdout9454 why I feel you took it personally , I'm describing my experience with very limited people

[@Montanero]

INFJs are filled with hidden adventures. Many have hobbies that you may only learn about months if not years after knowing them

[@heatherhafer3333]

Why do you mirror? I'm an INFP with an INFJ close friend. She mirrors me, but why??

[@greenchair_]

Unrelated but, I dunno who requested that Chase type Nick Cave, Rowland S Howard, Blixa Bargeld and Kate Bush on his celebrity types page, but we should be friends.

[@sharpiesarecool814]

Ugh so true enfjs treat the ppl closest to them like crap. Can't even blame them but I did call her out once and she realized it was true. It used to be really really bad but now it's more or less just underlying and not so blatant

[@malakashraf2801]

Like what would she do , ignore them or more ?

[@sharpiesarecool814]

@@malakashraf2801 just generally a very inconsiderate selfish person. Spend a lot of my parents money so she could look good at school.

[@camronbennett3400]

Can u do a video on infp men

[@suzieeheng4666]

What I said previously was indeed too rude and disrespectful. I am sorry I did that. What I would like to convey was just that I had no sexual interest in that student at all. I thought I was supposed to be edgy, but I used it in an immature way. Again, I am very sorry about it ❤

[@suzieeheng4666]

I should have realized that I made the mistake of projecting myself onto others again. The lack of humility is also what I need to practice more and to be more aware next time. There must have been more mistakes that I repeated but haven’t realized yet. I am sorry about it.

[@webkelpie]

A lot of information here.

[@kimmietwinnie]

CSJ is my lullaby

[@dandee6604]

Poor infp . I understand being oblivious . 😳

[@naamnei]

👍🏾

[@keith9473]

Interesting

[@Userykp]

4.04 lack of respect for who they r 👍

[@jenniferfranklin662]

Let me ungrind your gears with a least 1 INFP…ok 2 INFPs. I am an INFP and very disciplined. I was raised by an ISTJ (ex-Marine) father. Laziness was not an option. I have an INFP friend who is a former Navy Seal. So, no sloths in this camp. 🦥

[@HazLight4426]

Maybe you're not, but most INFPs are. I'm one of them and I know others, so I know. Sounds to me what he said got you a bit triggered. Also, just because you think/experience one thing, doesn't mean that's the reality.

[@honor9lite1337]

@@HazLight4426 Correct, some anecdotal case is a weak argument. It's reflection of how the person think.

[@tiberiusgrey1529]

in my opinion, your a subconscious/aspirational INFP; your Si child was raised by Se trickster instead of the Ne parent that's why your more likely to prefer the ESTJ side rather than the ENFJ especially with the mention of being raised in a high-performance demanding environment.

[@dogdonut3]

@@HazLight4426 Exactly! Same goes for all of us.

[@snakeyes1]

I thank you for sharing. I’m an INFP and raised by my Italian ENTJ father, who’s favorite subject is history and was born on Pearl Harbor… different year though. I understand being raised with strict and uncompromising rules and morals. I salute your father for his service. And my INFJ partners are very… permissive. I love how in control they are of their Ni, and how they ask me for figuring out when and how to navigate their “why”/Ni. I love that they understand our Catholic totem pole of his inferior Fi and my Fi hero. Sometimes I feel like we run the world. Lol… I despise white america 😅

[@alonzo3668]

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