Unsupportive Parents | FTM

[@Ash-uw4jc]

Dude, with the color of his walls, his bed and his shirt he made the trans flag lol, love you sam

[@pynpen1272]

OMG i didn’t notice that

[@jajadagreat8914]

Yep. And, its the great combo for tge transgender symbolism

[@wrenfinnelan5928]

My family claims to be supportive, especially my Mom, but they aren't. They are those types of "supporters". I still get called by female pronouns and by my birth-name. I still get called "girl". A slip now and then would be fine, but they have not made a single effort to acknowledge it. When I came out to my Dad, (very nice man, pretty much the only parent that really matters to me for very personal reasons) he just said, "You shouldn't rush into this." I told him I knew ever since I was 6, I've thought through it ever since I was 12. I finally recently accepted this when I was 16. I'm now 17, going to be 18 at the end of September of this year. My Grandma said she didn't care what my Sexual Orientation is, which has nothing to do with my gender identity. When I came out to my Mom (sobbing and having a breakdown) she was going on and on about how she supports me and everything. But I can't get a binder, because I could hurt myself, and surgery isn't really on a good note with her. At first, she kind of cared. She talked with an LGBT group counselor at a school nearby and said, "My daughter is Transgender." I wish she said Son. Mom later kept rambling to me about how she wanted me to get into a support group, and I really wanted that because 1. I am severely depressed, and have been for many many years now (my Mom being a huge reason) and 2. I don't have many friends and 3. I am in an anti-LGBT small town. My Mom hasn't done anything, and it's been 4 months. The only people that are actually making an effort are my sister and best friend. My sister is an alcoholic, is constantly working, and yet still manages to get my name and pronouns right. I never see her for months at a time. My best friend cannot use my preferred name or pronouns around other people, but called me her "big brother" and "Bro" and even wrote me a letter for Valentine's Day addressed as my preferred name. I'm going to college soon. I don't give a shit what my family thinks, but I'm going to start transitioning. I've looked up gender therapists in my LGBT+ accepting college area and I'm getting a job. I'm going to order a binder, and wear masculine clothes with a masculine haircut, and get an STP and use the men's room. I'm going to be called "Charlie" and go by male and neutral pronouns. I'm going to be me. I'll be 18 in September, at the end of the month. My family has always been extremely unhealthy and toxic, especially my Mom (she was neglectful and abusive in my childhood, and still holds those characteristics with emotional manipulation) so it's a huge relief to be getting away. Basically, I've only been a person if my family wanted something. That's my importance.

[@kerr-ionaevans2501]

Charlie Cee I'm sorry to hear about your family but it's good that once you go off to college that you can finally transition into who you were born to be. 😊👍

[@ghitaessabban2054]

you're gonna be ok, don't let negative people tear you down, if you tried your best to be patient and explain it to those you love and they still don't support you never forget that you are not the problem, embrace your true self and be happy, you are strong and you'll get through all of this

[@nael_tm]

Charlie Cee puuffff my family is the same, they say they accept and understand but it's not true at all, and as you say everything for them is wrong, can harm me, etc. Dealing with a mother like that is horrible, I've experienced...😒😫😫 I don't know when I'll come out... I think I'll never be brave enough to tell my family. A year ago I told my parents I wanted to study Russian and they laughed and said it was useless... So I don't want to think about how they would react if I tell them I'm ftm, probably the same, like 'now she wants that but soon she won't'.

[@kolekun3073]

This is exactly my situation :/

[@Karmakrane4life]

It's like I just read my entire situation

[@mszoeexx]

Not sure if this was on purpose, but the blue walls, the white bedsheets, and Sam's pink shirt make this video look like a transgender flag and I love it. Anyway, love you Sam, and this is an awesome, powerful video.

[@lsouthern890]

mszoeexx I noticed too haha

[@cyborgpunkmonk]

I scrolled to the comments to see if anyone else thought the same. X3

[@michealmartin3125]

I noticed

[@davybones1723]

I LOVE YOUR MANA PROFILE

[@yutheflerlim5224]

Was just about to comment the same thing ^.^

[@SupraMan38]

i tried my hardest to give you guys the best advice so let me know if there's anymore questions u have! ilu

[@ana-on9mg]

Sam Collins i love you

[@kadecameron8134]

Sam Collins ❤

[@vbracero6779]

Sam Collins how long did it take your mom to accept you being transgender ?

[@li-te8tg]

i love you you're amazing

[@sarahbennett8183]

I think you did very, very well. My parents are still not too understanding of the ideas of me being trans, but it's going better than the initial "mom i"m gay" months and months of issues and dealing and none of us handling it right. However, after the whole process and me explaining to them how I feel and what has changed and the differences between how I feel and how normal kids might feel. They Just need to be able to understand. And we are the only ones who know how we feel. We have to let them in, in order for them to understand. Give them a chance, even after their initial unsupportive comment or conversation. It took time for us to process how we feel and to understand ourselves, imagine how it is for our parents when we do a full 360 on them.

[@angeloeyes9210]

My mom says she's supportive when she really isn't. "Don't get surgery it could be dangerous." "Don't take hormones it could be dangerous." "Don't get a binder it could be dangerous." I understand that mom. I understand that you don't want me to get hurt. I can't be happy in my own fucking body though. I can't even be called my preferred pronouns and name at home because my family doesn't know. I only have relief with my friends and even then I don't pass well. You know why? Because I don't have anything that could possibly help me! I have a sports bra but even then it's not that good. I wish I could pass.

[@elliotaltman3108]

My mom says that she's supportive of me (I'm ftm) but she keeps putting off getting me a binder even though I've offered to pay and such. She says that she won't call me He/Him until I come out to my whole family who for the majority are very homophobic and transphobic.

[@aren690]

I remember I gathered enough courage to tell my mom to call me "he" a year or two ago for the first time, but she just laughed and made fun of me, so I haven't opened up about it after that. I feel very sad and anxious because I can't get help because of that, but I just hope things will get better in the future and I can live a happier life as myself. Thank you for making this video :)

[@bozo154]

This is weird because the day this was posted when my unsupportive father texted my mom because he started noticing I was wearing a binder and my mom used they/them pronouns. He told her that he would love me no matter what, and it made me so happy to see the dad who yelled at me when I came out as pan accepts me now

[@glorijozna]

I really needed this video because my parents are really unsupportive and I mean they are not bad people, they are just really catholic and they consider it wrong. thank you ❤

[@connorjames8298]

Glorija Zaic my parents are atheists so they have nothing to blame their ignorance and intolerance on

[@jrrobinhood9791]

I'm trans ftm but I haven't gone through any hormones for surgeries so I'm still living as a girl Im absolutely terrified to come out to my mum so this kinda helped but idk how to deal with anger and lectures

[@sweettee3502]

Jr Robinhood The same thing is happening to me, Just hold on dude and remember that you are a real boy and don't hurt yourself!

[@jrrobinhood9791]

Alex Dawson thanks and same to u good luck!

[@sarahbennett8183]

All you can do is let them talk. You have to listen to them in order for them to listen to you. Respect goes both ways

[@donathanbonch976]

Jr Robinhood don't talk back, it will make her even angrier, you got this man don't worry

[@sweettee3502]

Jr Robinhood Thanks!

Mtf here When I "came out" my mom lost her shit and went crazy on me and caused a lot of mental distress and pain She's gotten better but she doesn't still seem to care she calls me wrong pronouns and name behind my back And refuses to call me natalia only nat. She treats me bad for not being able to get a job when no places will even hire me when I've been applying for jobs for the 3 months straight. When she calls me wrong shit and it mentally hurts a lot when I'm trying so hard to feel more female everyday and just the vibes I get from her constantly make me depressed, just don't know what to do and I'm afraid I might end up hurting myself

[@cozylemons8644]

How are you doing natalia?

[@Jonesy_Bonesy]

I hope you're doing okay and you're happy Natalia. Wherever you are

[@kainoahthefrog]

I'm crying while watching this, my mom is "ok with trans people" but she keeps making me feel like shit for it. Talk about good timing, my mom called me "Kai" willingly for the first time and I started crying, I think she realizes how serious I am about wanting to be a boy now. Even though she won't call me my more realistic boy name "Jason" Kai is more than enough for me now.

[@melynn_0355]

Love the name! I've only met one other Kai and he happens to be one of my 2 closest friends at this point despite only knowing him for like half a year lol

[@dakki.dreamer1539]

My mother claims to be supportive, but she also says I'm too young to know, that its a phase (bc I used to like wearing dresses, and I still do sometimes), and that I'm disrespecting real trans people by taking this so seriously. She doesn't believe that I have dysphoria. What do I do please I'm dying

[@leogigax8481]

Thank you so much Sam I've been struggling to come out to my dad for the past week and I'm going to try my hardest to tell him tomorrow

[@FrankieUtka]

Tatiana Gigax I'm in the exaacctt sammee situation

[@l.ellison3542]

Tatiana Gigax let me know how it goes

[@leoisnotokay8815]

Tatiana Gigax did it go well?

[@XxcousinsxX]

Same

[@girlinbeige4023]

did it go well

[@klaussteamboat2898]

When I came out as transgender I got screamed at. They said I was to young and they call me more female pronouns than they did before..

[@bloomshroom6734]

real

[@OddBoyy]

it's been 6 years since I first came out to my mom. I don't think my mom will ever accept me. (she's a Christian lady) 😢 I'm on T and have my name changed. I'm working on getting top surgery before my 20th birthday

[@WolfTrout]

Every 4 years I try talking to my mom. But she ignores me and says she raised me wrong. Then she asks why I'm always depressed. So I understand your pain.

[@Jonasftw]

I don't know you, but I accept you. Stay strong.

[@Auysssie]

I'm sorry to hear that. As a Christian myself it just breaks me to heart when other Christians don't accept people because they don't agree with your lifestyle choice. If you do believe in God, just know he loves and accepts you no matter what.

[@Ange-or2np]

OddBoy shes not a real christian then

[@yikesspike]

You've done it without her, you've proved how strong you are dude :)

[@JustinClouse]

Wow... was not expecting KZbin to be so deep this morning. *Keep going, Sam! Your helping others is so admirable!*

[@ilovealfie400]

💜👏😂

[@taylorsprecttor3627]

Justin Clouse Love your videos dude. I subbed.

[@さくら-z6h1l]

My brother has stopped talking to me since I came out as trans he's says I'll always be a boy cause he believes a person can't "erase" their past. I haven't seen him since 5 years now 😔

[@nael_tm]

🌸 さくら my sister doesn't support me, like she doesn't believe I'm trans😔

[@さくら-z6h1l]

Niemand Rodriguez I'm sorry for you

[@limitedteen9614]

my little sister hates LGBTQ+ people and i told her i was gay (i didnt tell her i was FTM) she said"ew thats gross you should like boys not girls!" and i feel bad for you.

[@ysabiau4058]

🌸 さくら My brother has attempted to beat me before. I’m ftm.

[@PheonixStarsx]

It’s better you don’t deserve people like this you deserve acceptance like me I’m trans ftm and I have to cut off people who are unsupportive so I can be happy I cut off a girl I knew form elementary school and at first she was a good friend whenever I cried In class she would comfort me but when I came out she changed so much it was hard cutting her off

[@adrianoines521]

thank you for caring. i jjst came out as nonbianary and on of my best friends said that she is never gonna talk to me again. ive been crying at my house for an hour

[@adrianoines521]

ThatEmoBandTrash thanks. thats the first time ive smiled in a while

[@jax-ninjanat8778]

My Mother tried to take me to a doctor to get my brain checked, she said that I was going extreme and was basically trying to force m to say that I wasn't trans. And it really hurt the things that she said to me. The kid that she raised for 16 years she called, mental, extreme, selfish, a sinful blunder of God. It just goes to show that you can't trust some people that are closest to you.

[@BrwnBunniX33]

I’m so sorry..this is making me scared lol.

[@cradica]

I feel you but I am not trans however my mom tells me to suck it up and be a man whenever I feel pain like dude I can't even predict when I'm going to hurt myself

[@Astro.or-Ash]

My dad read my diary found out I was trans. Told him it was a joke he didn’t believe me but didn’t pry. I only live with my dad so it’s not easy. He listens to very transphobic podcasts in front of me he even bought a book for me to convince me I’m not trans. Luckily my mom supports me even though I don’t live with her.

[@casper6309]

my dad claims to be supportive but really isn't... I came out as bigender months ago because I thought it would go better than me saying "I'm trans, I feel like a boy" but.. it went awful. and just today, I asked my mom with homework help and she saw me put my preferred name on my paper at the top (my math teacher lets me).. she sighed and I could tell she was mad when she said "you're name is (deadname).." and as soon as she said that and left afterwards, I broke down crying... dysphoria just kinda took over my brain and it made me feel so awful about myself. I'm not allowed to do anything for myself as a person until I'm 18.. I have too live 2 more years until I can get a haircut (I have long hair), move out, start to physically transition, everything... I hate it so much....

[@Janiyah-Tucker]

I’m having the same issues, i actually have 3 years until i’m 18, yesterday i told my mom about me being or feeling like a boy she said “you’re too young and wait until your older” and then she was doing my hair, i was upset then she asked me “are you mad that i won’t you be a boy?” i wanted to cry at that moment..i still feel like a boy tho

[@bearynico]

An online counselor literally sent me this omg-

[@mikerider7779]

some parents are ignorant they can't understand our feelings and it sucks a lot, but we must go on and keep on trying to live the best we can🙂

[@cradica]

Yeah I am sis however my mom expects me to act so much like a man

[@jaeallen3060]

Hey, Sam! I live in a very unsupportive household, unfortunately. My mom is always acting against transgender movements, and she is also homophobic. My sister is neutral, since she is lesbian. But she doesn't support transgender rights, she tolerates it. I'm not out yet, im female to male. I've asked my mom to cut my hair, and she constantly responds with "you're not a guy. " I do wear all gender neutral clothing, and I wear boxers and I don't shave my legs or armpits because its what makes me feel comfortable. I can't bind yet, since im only 13 and I don't own a credit card. I'm extremely dysphoric, and its hard for me to look in the mirror. I do wear double sports bras, and wear baggy clothing, hoodies, and button up shirts. I'm also really short (5'2) so i wear fun colored shoes. (Does that help? I don't know) Anyways, I just wanted to thank you for all you have done. I didn't know I was trans until I started to watch your videos, and the amount of love and support you show is insane. I can tell you actually care, and I really respect you for all you have done for us! Love you, Sam. If anybody has any tips, support, or ideas for anyone else (or myself would be appreciated too) would you mind leaving them in the replies below? It would mean the world to me if I could get some support and tips on how to deal with this right now. Thanks again!

[@finder_]

hey, this is 2 years late but i just wondered how you are now? my parents are very homophobic and transphobic. im pretty young and have trouble identifying my gender, i was wondering if you have any advice or need any support?

[@jayden4287]

damn ur like 19 now! what happened since this comment

[@aleclorentus7834]

I thought when I came out they’d need time to understand so I told them totally respectful and optimistic but what was I thinking arguing with my narcissistic mom? 🤷‍♀️ On another note I’m here to support all of you and I hope you all have amazing supportive parents! If not I’m here to adopt you lol... and thank you for making this Sam

[@faustfelin9558]

I came out to my mom earlier today, she just said "You're stupid shut up." And refused to listen 😭

[@Moss-yv3mt]

thanks for this video man. my mother wll provavly never accept me, but ill try and make connections w supportive ppl. once she heard alex g sing "i am not the boy" (from song called boy) and she heard "i am not a boy". yelled at me for 2 hours after that. and before that one time where i came out as queer(not trans) she made me go to a public park (i have extreme social anxiety) and yelled there at me. idk for how long. it felt like it was hours. when i tried to walk away shed yell to come back and i did because i was scared. she banned me from all the rainbow ever since (2019). she thinks that "fixed" me, but im on my third attempt to yanno, not exist, and she doesnt know.

[@looneybin10]

i’m sorry that happened to you, it really sucks. so far, i have unsupportive parents as well. just know you are not alone.

[@milopenalozaosorio3992]

And also always keep in mind that time will past and someday you'll be old enough to make your own live how ever you want and you will make the transition And try to find more trans guys or girls that understand you :)

[@andersglud4664]

My parents don't understand it at all. My mom is trying to understand, but she is very critical about it. My dad does not at all understand it, and since I told him that I realized it after I saw a video about a trans boy and related a lot to it, he thinks I made it up as a spontaneous idea for some reason. And they both kind of think it's a phase. But I love my parents, and they love me, that's why they're critical about it; they don't want me to regret it later in life if I transition. But like I said, they love me, and I'm very close to them, and I know they'll come around eventually. But Sam, do you have any advice as to how I should confront them?

[@Zaidency]

It's a bit of the opposite situation with me. My mom doesn't understand it, and she thinks it's just because everyone online and my friends are trans and it's a trend.

[@pixieninga]

Hey Sam, could you do a video about getting testosterone? Like the process you have to go through, costs, insurance, etc? I've been trying to do research about it for next year once I start college but the internet has been super sketchy.

[@quinngeary7759]

i needed this today. thank you

[@bogisstrange3548]

My parents started shouting when I asked if I could get a hair cut because i hate the length of my haid and they said I would look like a boy- like thats the point-

[@elliot_the_simpleton]

I feel you, it sucks

[@micaelamengarelli8760]

I love how you always want to help others, doing this kind of videos and answering their questions, I love the kind of person you are, keep it up please, i'm so proud of you, love you sam!

[@jewelya-yr9uo]

You're so inspirational, you helped my brother through his transition. Thank you! Love you! 😇

[@chelseasmith2603]

I have given my parents 4 years to come to terms with me being ftm transgender and they are just so angry about the whole thing I don't understand.

[@ashleyching7894]

Surround yourself with people who accept you for who you are.

[@wonderingaround945]

I'm going to come out as ftm to all my friends. I'll tell my parents in 3 or 4 years.

[@mrmisterio6137]

Thank you Sam, thank you for giving me hope. I won't give up on my transition no matter what people say :)

[@gurllllls]

Wow I'm so proud of you. I find so amazing how you help so many people. You're truly amazing sam

[@milofinnliot1617]

My family, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, are all talking about how its "confusion" and "demonic" etc, and I'm always just sitting there at the table like uhhh, as they dehumanize my entire existence

[@elenarabano3075]

thank you sam, you can always make everyone feel better

[@jadibdraws]

I appreciate your realism Sam. Too often I hear unrealistic advice like just do it anyway you can't really do that when your under someone elses roof and not financially stable. Im not trans but I amvunsure of my sexuality. I knew for a while I was sexually attracted to women more so than I'm attracted to men. My moms side of the family is extremely religious they condemn homosexuals all the time and I know if they ever knew what was going on with me they'd condemn me and try to "pray the gay away". It just makes me sad because I am closer to my mom than my dad and it makes me feel like she can never really know me because of her homophobia.

[@staciechandler5574]

hi my name is Stacie to my parents I want my name to be Raegan I have tried to come out to my parents about 5 times but I doesn't work and I have got to say this video made me a lot happier because I know that things will come around with or with out my parents by my side

[@thwipthwap8870]

stacie_ chandler You don't want your name to be raegan

[@donathanbonch976]

stacie_ chandler just fucking tell it to them how it is, the way I came out is i just told them I was really struggling and I needed this, they were really confused at first, but they are supportive now, just say it's not a phase and this is who you are

[@Sabrina1377]

I came out in late 2015 and my whole family literally turned on me. I lost so many friends. On December 2016 I went back to the closet and only allowed to wear female clothes and just say it's all fine.. They even told the doctor that I don't feel that way anymore before I could speak. So, I'm going through depression badly cause I miss the past and where I used to live I was accepted a bit (in 2015 and early 2016) then I moved from Corpus Christi,Tx to New Braunfels,Tx in August 2016. My new school turned their entire backs on me. I'm still a bit hated, but now that I'm faking that I'm not trans, they are being nicer..

[@atissot2380]

I really needed this video today, thanks a lot Sam

[@terreplowell4691]

Thanks for the tips, Sam...personally I think if someone wants, they can write an email to their parents so that they can get out what they wanna say without getting interrupted or anything. I would find it much easier...then afterwards you can have a chat based on that email...idk just my opinion.

[@anayameadow9980]

My parents are unsupportive as well... I'm here for you! 💕 and you're exactly right!!!

[@iwatchedtoomuchsaikik8949]

im eleven years old and i am a demi boy (or so i think). Ive know i was trans since i was seven, but my parents dont support me. They told me i have to be born acting like a boy in order to be trans.. but they dont understand because THEY chose whst i weared, THEY always pressured me to fit in with girly stereotypes! (Sorry ik its a stereotype, not all girls are like that) I always told them i hated dresses and skirts and tights and dress shoes and high heels, but they thought it was a "phase". I came out when i was ten and i was crying, and then they told me they didnt beleive me and that i was wrong. That night i lost it. Ever since then my parents have always mocked my gender choice, and used it whenever we were angry at eachother. They even took everything in my room away from me a couple days later after i came out, what a coincidence./: to be fair i am eleven, i may be to young to be thinking about this. Ive researched along time but their is still a chance im wrong Idk tho, maybe i am rushing into this? Do you guys think im to young to know, because that might be true?

[@haemolacriac]

i haven’t come out yet but i remember many times when my dad was transphobic like when i was nine and playing a south park game where you picked if you were trans or cis and i accidentally picked trans and he said “thats bad unpick that” and he insulted one of my trans friends :(

[@gracerobbins2371]

I agree with Sam on all of this video, but majorly on the part where he states that if someone truly loves you, they will come around to accept you eventually, whether this be 3 months or 3 years. As a early teen transguy, I deal with a transphobic & homophobic mother. She's the only parent I live with and she is completely unsupportive. I came out to her last August about being pansexual and transgender and she was not having it. She said many things I'm not going to list here, and she claimed that she would never accept me for that no matter what. It's March and she is currently ignoring it and when I bring it up she acts like she has no clue what I'm talking about. Personally from knowing my mother, I know she's more than likely never going to come around to accepting me. I'm perfectly fine with waiting until I'm 18. that's like 3 and a half more years, but I can handle it. I've surrounded myself with people who love and accept me and people who care about my happiness, so everything is good. I don't believe my mother loves me in the way a mother should love me due to many other reasons, not just ones regarding how unsupportive she is. but... I do believe that if she did truly love me, she would accept me for this. this is just my story for this video, so ye c:

[@H_eather11]

I saw the comments and lowkey most people relate with others so let us all run away from family together and live how we r supposed to lmao

[@RDrawzDragonz]

My mum ; I'm not transphobic! so you'll accept their pronouns? My mum; no.

[@Fostero7]

Relatable

[@LGBTR3naissance]

Commend you 100% for making this video Sam. No doubt it will open minds and hearts against the sexual bigotry still prevalent in the world. Having positive support and encouragement plus confidence in yourself is really important when someone wants to come out, whether they be family or friends. A willingness to understand and accepting mindset is what everyone should have. Ignorance, internal prejudice and stereotypical attitudes only sow the seeds for toxicity that crushes a person's self-esteem.

[@annaberry5051]

Anytime I bring it up around my mom she goes “well I know you like guys”... I can tell she won’t be supportive

[@robotictobi8148]

Its ironic because my transitioning boyfriend is named Sam. But...my parents don't like the thought of me being trans and so that's great...but my Friends are beautiful people. My friend Alex gives me tips while IM transitioning and I give him tips from yours and Miles' videos. Your videos help me and I went through gender disphoria but now I'm putting myself in a place of comfort and getting a binder soon. I love my friends and I had one of them say "This is Tobi and he is one of the cutest boys I know. He is the green bean." I love this so much and even though my parents don't support me, and won't even let me step into target *cough*...I love what you do and I appricate everyone who is trans, queer, androgynous, bi, gender fluid, and even straight as a stick. Thanks Sam. -Ukulele Gay Boi

[@ElliottAaronn]

thank you so much sam i honestly been struggling with my mum and her un acceptance with my transision and this just made me feel so much better. thank you so much

[@toastandoatmeal7085]

My parents refuse to acknowledge the difference between gender dysphoria and body dysphoria two vastly different things and even after telling them at least 23 times and sending links to articles (that they refused to read) they still think I’m just mad that i don’t like my body aka they think its the same thing as a girl hating her tummy fat... just the other day my dad just said a slew of things to me aka he was talking with my teacher and he repeadely called me the bst lady and the lretiset girl....and it fucking hurt and i was in a glum mood all the way back home and when he asked what was wrong and I told him he just kinda....looked mad and then shouted “WHY!” it honestly seems like he thinks I do this to annoy him idk what to do anymore

[@kaydenmicheal9161]

I hate not being out as trans because before I accepted myself and came out to a friend of mine who is the only person who knows; I was in such a bad place mentally that I wanted to hurt myself every minute or every day. I accepted myself as trans a bit ago after questioning for a year and a half for certain trans but was questioning my gender 3 years before that and only came out to my friend not too long ago as trans at least. But since then I haven't even thought of hurting myself and I've been happier because I started dressing how I wanted and stuff. Next step is getting a plan b before coming out just in case I get kicked out because if my family I live with won't accept me than no one else will and I mean like no one. But thank you; your a big inspiration to me because you've been such a big help in me finding myself. :D Have a lovely day!

[@nopenah7259]

It’s not safe for me to come out and it’s very difficult to deal with dysphoria when I have to act like a girl, look like a girl, be a girl, etc. All the time. But I can’t do anything about it cause I already get in trouble for asking to get my hair cut or even mention the lgbtq+ community. I secretly bought a binder, men’s jeans, an oversized t-shirt and a beanie so I deal with my situation by in my own room just trying to look more like who I am inside with putting my hair in my beanie and stuff and I just look in my mirror and just validate myself and that I’ll be in a better situation one day.

[@jacksamer8795]

I understand it is hard to deal with dysphoria so try coming out to an adult you know supports you. Later when you turn 18 try to be in a good financial situation and start transitioning. Don’t let people tell you who you should or shouldn’t be, stay strong.

[@raygunjones7057]

ok, so I the type of person that keeps thing hidden from people because I have really bad anxiety. i myself for years was figuring this out. I'd known I was trans for two years and the 2 years before I was figuring out what it was. I finally got enough courage to tell my mother and she doesn't believe me because I've never said anything about wanting to and that there's not story's of people that "just turn trans". She feels that this is a phase. Do you have any ideal of how I could change that? if you reply- Thank you. love your videos btw-

[@kyloreilly4384]

I only just came out to my friends and family. The advice here is the best I have heard so far, I have been shunned and beaten down but I will try to help them understand. Thank you.

[@haillybailly1669]

Thank you so much for this video! You really help me so much honestly, you are such a big inspiration and always there with ur videos to help people. I love you for that. I've been really struggling recently with my parents cause they aren't accepting me at all and call me ill for being transgender... so this video really helped me a lot, thank u sam

[@blockofsugar]

Aw, I came out to my parents the day you posted this. (Unfortunately I didnt see this video before hand) My parents told me I'm crazy and that it's all because I spend too much time on the internet. I assumed that they didn't understand so I told them what it means. My parents didn't bother to listen and just told me that they don't want that in their family. I'm scared to tell my friends (some know already) because I over-heard some kids in my class making fun of transgender people and making rude jokes about it. I'm also not quite sure if I should even tell anyone because I'm ftm but I am attracted to guys.. I'll try to remember the poinyts made in the video when I try again. Thanks x

[@ashflint7865]

My mom calls me by my name but my whole family pretty much calls me by she her claiming they’re trying and constantly going ASH MY BEUTIFUL GIRLLLL and they know I’m on the verge of suicide already

[@lorenzoabrick5188]

A video about trans advice Light pink shirt. White bed. Light blue walls. I don't care if that was intended or not, but I love it.

[@spazmatismsf385]

Homestuck Obsessor me too! 😁

[@ssilverware]

Thank you so much for this video omgg.. It's been almost a year since I've come out to my mom and when I did she unfortunately didn't believe me and I've been too scared to bring it up since. I'm planning to talk with her again after I turn 18 this May to discuss everything and.. I hope all goes well. Thank you again, you're amazing and I always enjoy your videos

[@BIjimmy1961]

I am so proud of Sam,Thanks

[@hannahmagno4996]

tell us the story of the first time u cut your hair !!

[@devinvillegas8881]

I came out to my transphobic parents.. long story short, I'm gonna need new and accepting parents😕

[@marsmri3180]

u are so kind still understand people who dont support :xx very rare

[@kalegirouard8705]

I told my mom I was trans a little over a week ago, maybe a week and a half now. right off the bat she wasn't accepting. I do get that it takes time for people, especially parents to get used to the new names and pronouns, but my mom told me she will not enforce the new name or pronouns, and she thinks it's a phase but I've been in denial for 2 years. she told me she will forever call me by my deadname and my old pronouns, even if I change my name. So at the moment I feel unsafe in my home, but not a bad unsafe. just like a... uncomfortable unsafe.

[@mary34567]

I came out to my mom this week and she was awful with it, so this video was appreciated thank you! 💕💕

[@donathanbonch976]

Mary Maertens I hope your mom gets better at understanding the situation, it sucks not having an unsupportive parent, but just educate them and they will eventually understand

[@Olivereliocorcordium1983]

thank you for this video sam ive been struggling with this and im an adult i live on my own but my mom right now is in control of my financial situation since i am having hell finding a job right now this video has given me hope of transitioning soon 😊 thank you!

[@ysabiau4058]

My parents act like they’re supportive but aren’t. They won’t even let me cut my hair or get a chest binder, they claim to do research but only are trying to find counselors, and they don’t acknowledge i’m sad. My brother bullies me even though he doesn’t know i’m trans and i’ve gotten into self harm. My life is falling apart.

[@hylan4864]

My mom doesnt accept me and she just refuses to believe that I'm trans. It sucks,, but I'm not letting that stop me,, I made an appointment for me to start T on the 14th since I dont need her consent

[@AnukaCat]

"2 years have been enough mom, stop being a bitch!"

[@rxchelsteph]

i have unsupportive parents, im not even allowed my hair cut or wear gender neutral clothes. only my friends are supportive, and from my experience, just having a few people who accept you is better than none

[@FormigaFit]

My parents don't understand that I don't care about them enough to fear disappointing them. If they roll around in their graves disappointed by me, I could care less.

[@basicindiebro]

My parents told me I embarrassed them. That was 10 years ago. No change. Sometimes you have to accept that it is what it is sometimes.

[@lsouthern890]

THE COLOUR SCHEMING IS BOMB

[@tiffanymchardy7030]

I just watched this with my friend josh who is trans and has unsupportive parents and he says thank you, this helped him so much. We love you Sam! 💖

[@marshy_man]

my family claims that they'll support me no matter what but every time I try to talk to them abt anything gender related they just tell me I need to try and stop thinking about it for a while and that I need to embrace my "female side" whatever tf that means and the one time I tried to tell my mum I actually wanted to transition she told the rest of my family and they all said that's fine but I'm not allowed to get a binder because I could hurt myself and they think I'll get cancer, I'm not allowed to see anybody for it (gender therapy or anything medical), they always go on about how trans people don't need to medically transition they can just accept themselves and their bodies but also act supportive when people do get surgery and stuff and say that real trans people do get all the surgeries so they're just very mixed up in their views. I'm basically not allowed to do anything except wear mens clothes lol like they were calling me my name and pronouns for less than a week to see if it felt good for me but they stopped bc I wasn't doing my schoolwork and said they'll gender me correctly when I start "giving back" bc they try so hard for me and all that and they never started gendering me correctly lol they didn't even bring it up again so at this point I give up I'm just gonna go with saying I'm lesbian my whole life i can't be bothered anymore

[@Xic_9096]

i’m sorry that’s happening to you :( although in your situation i would try to go behind my family’s back and try gender therapy but idk i wish you luck :]

[@Geeky.rainbow.vampire]

my mum is fairly supportive, and has actually considered taking me to a gender therapist and starting T... Dad has been pretty close to just either kicking me to the street, or sending me to shock therapy... so... yeah...

[@m1ckzilla]

I’ve known I was not female for over a year and still haven’t told anyone I wanna tell my friends then come out to my mom but everyone I know is homophobic and transphobic so... idek what to do anymore

[@spookytom]

Thank you so much for this, it really helped me. Love you dude!

[@abbibuckman567]

My grandmas transgender and my family never talks to her anymore and they all hate her and I'm transgender also but I haven't told my parents yet only really close friends my parents hate the whole idea of being trans because there really Christian and we also live in Texas which doesn't help and all I want to be is a boy but I can't 😫

[@shadowofthedarkness7321]

Lmao coming out was my bigest mistake I wish I just ran away and NEVER told my dad. Im tired

[@saram.langelaar9123]

w0t the heck sam. this was such a nice and safe video and you honestly are so helpful! thanks, i love you boii :)

[@spaceaesthetic3543]

I'm crying. My mom said I can't cut my hair to look like a boy's hair style. (I haven't came out yet) and she said I can't because I'd look like a lesbian trying to be a boy. At least she got the boy thing right. I need help. :( (Also I'm FTM )

[@headybrew]

I think your advice about coming out to parents is probably very good. But I (a cis parent, an ol' white guy, ha!) would just like to add that you shouldn't assume that your parents will take it badly. If my little boy ever wants to tell me that he is questioning/trans/etc. I want him to know that it's OK with me and I will love and support him(her?) either way. In fact, as he becomes old enough to understand, I intend to tell him as best I can about gender issues so that he will be accepting of others, and so that if he ever does have anything to tell me, he will never even feel the need to hesitate.

[@WolvesDogsGaming]

I can not stress this enough if you don't feel safe coming out to your parents then DONT. Do not feel like you have to come out to your parents. I see kids get kicked out of their parents house/physically/emotionally abuse their child because they come out as gay/bi/trans etc. There will always people who will love and support you for who you are.

[@alexmaxwell4194]

I found this video super calming and it give me a lot of hope,thanks Sam x:)

[@kailer9839]

I always used to think that I was a boy or that I wanted to be a boy, but my mum kept reminding me that "I'm a girl and always will be" or that "I'm being ridiculous and It's just a phase" and it maked me feel like sh*t. I brought it up again a few weeks ago, and guess what! She said it again! That I'm being "ridiculous" and it's all a "phase" and her knowing very well, I've been like this my entire life. 14 years is a while if it's "just a phase"... I'm terrible at explaining things, so how do I explain what transgender is..? (also the fact that I suck that English)

[@feralpossum2089]

I came out to my sister (12) and she said.. oh ok. Be happy. But my mum reacted so different.. She called it a mental illness, said I am too young (16), that I am just faking it, asked me in the face "what did I do wrong?" and got loud. Now she won't let me wear a binder, boys clothes, does not allow me to cut my hair and does not want to talk with me about me being trans... Also since I don't have a dad, it hurts even more because I just have her..

[@anerd1844]

I told my mom about 1 year ago and I told my dad 4 months ago through letter. My mom never talked about it much but today my dad talked to me. He kept telling me that he's cool with how I express myself and how I feel and how he wants me to be comfortable and confident with myself but..he kept saying that he'll never see me as a guy or call me his son. He told me that "youll always be female, you'll never have male parts or look like a guy" and omg when he left I started laughing and crying at the same time about how uneducated he is about the transition process lol

[@v_reads807]

Sorry to dump, but i wasn't sure if i was trans. I just wanted to get top surgery. My family called it self mutilation and threatened to send me to a mental hospital. Now i feel more inclined to be myself, but what if theyre right? i dont know, i just want to be happy.

[@pilluche2664]

My dad thinks that top surgery and T are mutilation and that if I do go through with my transition he won't support it but can't prevent me from doing so. He compared it to taking drugs so now even though I know top surgery will make me happy I'm not sure if I should go through with it anymore. (Sorry if that didn't make sense English isn't my first language)

[@princessjulianaa]

the only way i'm getting through high school as a trans guy is having supportive friends, so if anyone here ever needs someone to talk to just hmu on tumblr (excalibrs) cause yall should never have to feel alone !! yall deserve the best

[@damnianbobert1559]

Thank you so much. I’m terrified to tell my parents because of religion. What you say always helped me feel amazing. I want to be male though my birth gender is female I don’t know if I’ll look good as a male. I don’t know if it’s just a phase. I’m going to wait about a year to make sure I’m 100%. Thank you for your love and support to your fans.