Victorious or Victimized? Gabor Maté REACTS to Kelly Clarkson's Trauma Anthem "Because Of You"

This clip is from Episode 4 of the brand new podcast "LET'S GET LYRICAL With Carice and Daniel". Thanks for watching!
• SUBSCRIBE here and on your favorite podcast platform:
linktr.ee/cari...
• To WATCH the entire EXTENDED video version containing 50 minutes of bonus content, and to get full access to ALL extended video episodes, go to / letsgetlyrical .
ABOUT THE SHOW:
Award-winning actress Carice van Houten (Game of Thrones) teams up with acclaimed musical theatre composer-lyricist and bestselling author Daniel Maté (The Myth of Normal) for a freewheeling new podcast all about one of their favorite topics: song lyrics. All topics, all eras, all genres... ALL lyrics, ALL the time.

[@frankingenito]

Kelly's dad left when she was 6. She wrote this song when she was 16. She was the first winner of American idol. Kelly is now 40 and has had a very successful music career as well as hosting her own talk show for the last 4 years. I know you were focused on the lyrics, but Kelly has an incredible voice and can sing any genre of music. She is arguably the best singer of the last 20 years and for me, she is my all time favorite singer. By the way, I'm not a young pop music fan. I'm a 64 year old music lover.

[@sodoffbaldrick3038]

Her mother couldn't cope with the breakup of the marriage, and so as Kelly said, she leaned on Kelly and talked to her as an adult about things she had no right to burden her with.

[@HarlowTheoryX]

THANKYOU!!! 🖤🖤

[@englishwithease1439]

The song is actually about her parents. Her dad left her when she was a kid, so most of the song is about abandonment. But it's also about her mom when it goes: "you should have known better than to lean on me". Kelly said this on The Voice to a contestant who sang her song.

[@shigemorif1066]

Because of you, I’m ashamed of my life because it’s empty. So brave to say that aloud and be that open about your pain. Amazing song.

[@ronsmock1879]

An even more powerful follow up song to this one "Piece By Piece" from the American Idol season before they took an extended break.You want to watch this live show where Kelly breaks down on stage while singing.

[@CLCM28]

yes...Piece by Piece is even more raw than this one.

[@Remmysage]

Then she wrote Rock Hudson, and re wrote piece by piece finding out her hero is actually herself.

[@rhettmitchell]

It was crazy to watch this and see people not understand the song at all after trying to examine the lyrics lmao. Especially older guy on the bottom. Not everything has to have a happy ending. She eventually got to that point, but she wrote this song at 16 while still dealing with so much familial trauma, so the point of the song is not to celebrate healing, it’s to show that she’s went through pain and that she’s acknowledging it and taking the first steps TO healing. This song is just Kelly baring her soul to the world and it was a huge hit bc of how real it was, especially for pop radio

[@angiedemoncada2603]

If you watch the video the anger comes across more clearly

[@janesmith3123]

She has overcome so much. A great song, she wrote when she was 16 yrs old.

[@lane-petcarechildcare3341]

Oh, I love this song so much. I used to listen to it obsessively many years ago, it's such a powerful song. Here's my interpretation. The first thing in dealing with trauma is acknowledgement. It has nothing to do with victim mentality to acknowledge that yes (in this case), as a parent you've failed me and there are so many things that I struggle with as an adult as a direct consequence of the childhood I've had. And, as an adult, it is up to every individual to work on themselves, to rebuild themselves - which would be the next step. However, in my understanding, that next step is not what this song is about. There is a certain process of grief that comes with this acknowledgement of trauma and this song explores precisely that, imo (it's crushing overwhelming grief I hear when I listen to it - and yes, a tinge of anger/resentment during the "I was so young / You should have known better" part).

[@azarmajedi]

Very interesting. I'd never listened to the lyrics and used to find the song cheesy. But now wow! interesting. The father-son dynamism is so interesting. Love it. A fan of Gabor, was funny to see Daniel challenging him and Gabor takes it without any argument.

[@danielmatemusic]

lol well he held his ground but ultimately agreed. of course it started with me interrupting him. which is very much our dynamic.

[@azarmajedi]

@@danielmatemusic I'm a mum! and my adult kids interrupt me or try to show me I think I know a lot, but! It's all good-hearted. But it's our dynamism. I really try hard not to interrupt them, but they, well! Love it. I really enjoyed the podcast. Your insight to the song is amazing. Had never thought much of this song. Honestly thought it was cheesy.

[@richardh776]

Cheesy! That is an insult. The song is NOT CHEESY. It is a great song.

[@Evdailey01]

Please check our piece by piece as well. It’s a more biting bookend to this song. She wrote because of you when she was only 16. Pxp was written as a married woman. Much different perspective

[@gayleconvey5118]

She rewrote Piece by Piece after her recent divorce. It is even better. Now she is picking up her own pieces.

[@gayleconvey5118]

This song was about her mother and it helped me with my feelings and expression of those emotions about my own mother. Kelly was young when she wrote it and has matured beautifully since then. She has recently divorced but I can guarantee she will never mirror her mother’s behaviour with her own children.

[@kerry378]

I barely heard the chorus of this song in 2005 as I was going through a divorce and a mourning...It struck every childhood and adult wounds and traumas. Her latest songs match it...yes, like a wail...an emotional wail. Me (her latest single) is the culmination of her growth many years later.

[@charlesbeausejour1902]

I'm sure they would have been in real awe, if they saw the film version of it!

[@jorymcmillian3432]

Check out Piece by Piece (2015) by Kelly Clarkson! 😊 Thanks.

[@r.rodriguez1257]

Piece by Piece American Idol finale version and I Don't Think About You are great videos about her dealing with personal issues.

[@Remmysage]

She is the original American idol. Do y’all live under a rock?? Lol

[@InvalidatedSyd]

Please also react/dissect lyrics to kelly clarkson’s song Piece By Piece which is almost a sequel to Because of You which she also co-wrote.. this touches on the same trauma and how it informed her future kzbin.info/www/bejne/rZCXe5p9g5eof8k

[@cariceanddanielgetlyrical]

Thanks for the suggestion! We tend to prioritize requests from our Patreon subscribers and will be doing an all-request stream sometime in the next few months. Link in video description if you want to check it out.

[@Remmysage]

Her father left her at 6 years old…. Of course she is a victim

[@t.johnson2966]

Wow! I feel so blessed to listen in on such a genuine reaction. Your father has taught me so much on how to deal with my childhood trauma. Thank you!

[@melodytannerclark]

Dr Mate’s dismissive insult to a whole nation’s people is interesting in light of his comments about Kelly’s song being about blaming. Sounds very much like a victimizer’s reaction. People who go through this kind of extreme trauma have a damned right to assign blame. It is healing.

[@Caperhere]

Thank you.

[@Kelly-rs8ut]

You really should watch the video of the song. It explains her trauma much better

[@rj-zz8im]

Dive into Kelly's music. I don't understand how you can love music and not know Kelly lol

[@donnasackett8005]

She wrote this at 16 yrs

[@mariaangelini949]

Nope-this song is about her mother. Piece by Piece is about her father.

[@mspalzak]

Its so nice to have you father on the podcast… you will get through this together… I see he is working on his mistakes … Daniel, I wish you great success with this podcast.

[@kevyak]

The official video explains it better

[@caitlin2418]

It was American Idol ;)

[@cariceanddanielgetlyrical]

yes, a live viewer gave us the correct answer.

[@Willyp6064]

Watch the official video kinda pictures it more.

[@treada1583]

interesting....

[@MarleneAug2010]

Kelly wrote this song when she was 16. Victim mentality?

[@LuisVasquez-qv1tx]

React to 3 doors down here without you

[@billiestevens5333]

Who are these people? Victim mentality? Our upbringings has a big affect on the adults we beome. These people have completely missed the point...hope these people are not therapists, they're rubbish at it.

[@ilcu4p]

The third person seem not to understand trauma. He is so piss off rude and I don’t have anything nice to say to him because he thinks victim is being bad.

[@JVSfit23]

But if you watch the video you see how she fixes it. You just watching the lyrics so you miss the outcome of Kelly thinking about her past. So to judge just on the lyrics show how you 3 are pathetic and clearly don’t go out of your way to see the whole picture. To judge just the lyrics is lazy. Actually watch the video to get the full picture before you judge based on one side of it. Pathetic